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No Gentle Desires

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She could feel the sweat gathering under her collar. Her body temperature was rising as events progressed. She jerked the restraints holding her wrists and sighed, content to be so surely tied. There was a sound of movement behind her and she felt the tendrils of the flogger strike across her shoulders.

"No need to tug on those, you know." And the flogger struck again, across her ass.

"I'm sorry."

She heard something, something fall to the floor, then felt hands on her shoulders; they rested there for a moment and she felt the press of another body into her back. The hands slid from her shoulders to her breasts. Strong fingers found her nipples and pinched them hard.

"You will be."

* * * *

It was a cliché. A basement bar, appropriately dark, music loud, but not so loud that it ruled out conversation, and a crowd of people in various forms of leather and latex and less. No, not people. Women. Only women. She had never been there before, but she hadn't looked that hard to find it either. She crossed the floor to the bar, trying not to look too obvious in a dress-down version of fetish wear. Only a leather halter top that barely covered her breasts, with a battered pair of button fly jeans, and an old pair Doc's. She yelled her order into the ear of the bartender and was rewarded with a drink. Though not her usual brand, it was cold to the point of frost; she gripped the bottle tightly and fought the tension in her neck as she took a drink. The beer burned in her throat but even the smell of something as familiar as beer calmed her. She turned and leaned her back against the bar, trying not to adjust the shirt again even though she found it difficult to believe that she had chosen to wear a shirt whose neckline plunged to her navel in public.

The other patrons did little more than look in her direction before returning their attention to their drinks and friends. How so many managed to be holding conversations with the music and the activities in the bar amazed her. The woman in her fifties chatting away as she stroked the breasts of a girl who looked little more than a teenager who knelt beside her chair. She fought the urge to ask for id. In a corner, one woman held another's arms behind her back as she kissed her neck and crawling toward the bar, heavy leather restraints on her wrists, a collar, and nothing else, was another woman. She whistled as she came to bar and the bartender, nonplussed, took a piece of paper from under her collar. She then returned with a tray of drinks and somehow managed to balance them on the woman's back, who then crawled away.

Thoroughly engrossed in what she was watching, fighting with herself, her own desires balanced against everything her job had shown her, she didn't notice the woman encased in black vinyl stand walk up and stand beside her. She only felt the tightening of muscles in her stomach and the need to swallow to keep from drooling openly. The crawling distraction allowed her to be shocked when the woman beside her spoke and moreover, spoke directly to her, and already knew her name.

"I never expected to meet you here, Olivia."

Olivia jumped; the music had reached a crescendo so no one heard her gasp, not even herself. Someone spoke to her, shattering the spectacle of ass and cunt slowly crawling away from her, and someone knew her name. She turned to face her would-be conversationalist. At first, the face made no sense; it could not be attached to a body standing next to her in shiny black vinyl, one zipper up the middle of her chest and one on each of her legs until covered by boots. The outfit revealed far more of the figure than anyone at the precinct had ever seen.
"Aren't you going to say hello?"

"Hi Alex."

Alex smirked and Olivia fought her shock to find something more to say. "Nice outfit."

Alex laughed outright and gave Olivia an appraising look. "Thanks, you too."

Olivia started to adjust her shirt and then stopped, deciding there was no real reason to be nervous. She knew this woman. Though she did know this woman, so perhaps that was reason to be nervous, though whether the Alex Cabot she knew and the woman standing beside her were at all alike remained to be seen.

Alex leaned against the bar. Olivia grinned, trying to figure out something to say. "I bet Ms. Manners never covered this."

Alex laughed and brushed some stray hairs from her eyes. She had never thought of Olivia Benson as strictly vanilla, but she had never imagined she was this far from vanilla. She had debated whether to say anything to her at all, to even move from her table to say hello but as Olivia had leaned against the bar and tried to look relaxed Alex felt obligated to throw her a life line -- and she felt something else as well: intrigued. "I suppose I could ask what's a woman like you doing in a place like this?" Alex asked, glancing around at the bar and its inhabitants.

Olivia laughed. "I could ask you the same thing."

"Should we leave it at we have some things in common other than the pursuit of justice?"

"Sounds good to me."

"Great. Want to join me?"

"What the hell, lead on."

Alex laughed and leaned into Olivia, "Be careful who you say to around here," and walked toward a table. She started, then laughed, followed Alex and hoped she was kidding.

An awkward silence built after they sat; they both sipped their drinks, and both struggled for a way to release any one of the hundred questions meeting each other in this bar raised. Instead, neither said anything for several minutes and simply watched the few couples swaying on the dance floor, taking time to recover from mutual shock. Alex found herself content to stare at Olivia, appreciating the woman in a way she had never allowed herself before. Though she tried to police her fantasies and keep her co-workers from them, Olivia had cropped up from time to time. Now Alex found herself wondering guiltlessly if Olivia's breasts turned as red as her face when she blushed.

Olivia, however, grew more nervous and started to talk to break the tension. "You know Alex, I never would have pegged you for being into this." Not a subtle comment, but an effective one.

Alex's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"


"I could say the same thing about you."


"I mean, I figured you for a nice straight girl. In every sense of the word."

"And again, I could say the same thing about you."

Alex smiled. "So we can agree that you shouldn't make assumptions."

They both laughed and the tension eased somewhat. She stood and held out her hand to Olivia. "So, want to show me just how bent you are?" Olivia took it and Alex led the way to the dance floor.

There were only a few other couples on the floor but the bar was so small it seemed crowded. The two women moved easily to the music, the steady bass vibrating in their ears, pounding in their stomachs. Dancing was far easier than talking. Alex pulled Olivia to her as the music's tempo changed and wrapped one arm around her waist, lazily draping the other across her shoulders. The way Alex grabbed Olivia, directed her movements, pressed their bodies together left no question in Olivia's mind as to Alex's role, nor did Olivia's acquiescence leave any doubt in Alex's. Alex proved the point further by quickly turning her so Olivia's back was pressed to her front. The tempo changed again and Alex's hands moved with it as Olivia reached behind her to keep Alex's body as close to hers as possible. She had forgotten how good, how right it felt to let go, to cede control to someone else, to accept what the other person was willing to give. And Alex gave freely; she let her hands wander from shoulder to breast to back to ass to stomach and repeated with endless variation. They both allowed themselves to sink deeper into the music, into the steady warmth of flesh and leather. Alex rested her chin on Olivia's shoulder and spoke into her ear. "You're liking this?"


"I wonder what else you like?"

"I like lots of things."


Olivia turned in Alex's arms. "I think I should finish my beer." There was no way to mistake what was happening; Alex was pursuing her and Olivia was slowing down, waiting to be caught.

Alex ran a hand down Olivia's cheek loving the softness of the skin under her fingers, wondering what the texture of Olivia's skin was like elsewhere. "Yes, you should finish your beer," she said, leaning closer to Olivia, so close that Alex's lips were on Olivia's cheek, leaving the faded mark of lipstick behind. Alex worked her way in easy kisses from Olivia's cheek to her ear and whispered, "and when you're done with your beer we can discuss what you like and what I like." She bit lightly on Olivia's earlobe and then broke away to lead Olivia back to their table.

"What do you like, Alex?" Olivia asked quietly when they were sitting.

Alex grinned and toyed with a napkin as Olivia took a nervous swallow of beer. "Oh let me see, the ocean, first rainstorm in spring, bondage, John Waters movies, snow peas, a good bottle of red wine, a woman screaming my name as she orgasms, you know, the usual.

Olivia nodded but didn't meet Alex's eyes.

"What's wrong Olivia?"

Olivia shook her head.

"Tell me what's wrong."

Olivia was afraid to speak; she knew that her voice would crack when she tried. She tried to swallow away a lump of fear, of all her fears, in her throat, but it didn't work. Alex took her chin in her hand and tilted her face upward. "Scared?"

Olivia nodded.

"No need to be."

"It's just ... "

"I know but it's okay."

"Is it?"

"Absolutely fine," Alex said, taking Olivia's hand. "Nothing will happen that you don't want to happen. And you wouldn't be here if you didn't want something to happen." Olivia thought for a moment, then looked at Alex, smiled and nodded.

Alex stood and took Olivia up with her and pulled them through the crowd to the back of the bar. The lights from the dance floor flashed like fireworks on the wall, the stopped altogether as they rounded a corner. Alex's grip was tight on Olivia's hand. She chucked her hip against the door of the washroom and sniggered as she led Olivia into one of the stalls. She pushed Olivia against the wall; they were very close, their breasts were touching. Alex looked at Olivia and saw the excitement in her eyes and all but whispered, "If you want to keep going look at the floor. If not, look at me and tell me this never happened." Olivia looked at the floor, saying nothing, moving only her eyes. Alex leaned closer and kissed Olivia, her tongue easing past her lips, tracing her teeth. She drapped her arm around Olivia's waist and Olivia repeated the movement.

"You know to use the traffic signals right Olivia?" Alex asked as Olivia rest her head on Alex's shoulder, peppering her neck with kisses. "Mmm-hmm," she said against Alex's ear.

Alex broke away from the kiss. "Turn around and bend over." Olivia tried to be graceful but the stall was a tight squeeze and she brushed against Alex as she moved. She put her hands on the back of the toilet and felt Alex's hands on her ass, stroking a pattern of eights. Then a hard smack which made Olivia gasp even through her jeans. "Nice ass," she said, "now turn around and undo your shirt."

Olivia untied the string holding up her shirt. Alex uncovered her breasts; she took one in each hand and traced Olivia's nipples with her thumbs. She leaned closer, resting her lips against her ear, lightly biting the lobe. Olivia shuddered, pushed her body closer, loving the feel of her skin against the vinyl of Alex's outfit. "You enjoying yourself?"
Olivia moaned, pushed harder against her. Alex grabbed her nipple and pinched it between her thumb and forefinger and pinched it. "When I ask you a question answer either yes Alex or no Alex. Now are you enjoying this?" She punctuated the question with a hard nip at Olivia's ear.

"Yes, Alex."

Alex eased off her grip on Olivia's nipple as she laid a trail of kisses down Olivia's neck. Olivia fought not to shiver but the goose bumps on her skin gave her away. Her hands shook with the urge to open her jeans and show Alex just how excited she was.

Alex started to speak between kisses and nips. "If there's something you want or want to do it's please Alex and if you want to stop or slow down, traffic signals, red and yellow." She slid her hand to the top of Olivia's jeans and undid the buttons. "Of course, is you think you can stand more, there's always green. That fairly clear?" Alex slid her hand into Olivia's jeans and slipped between her thighs.

"Yes, Alex," Olivia moaned as she found her clit. She bucked her hips against Alex as she played with her clit and pushed two fingers inside of her, happy that Olivia was so wet, so eager. She started and easy rhythm of thrusts and then said, "No coming, Olivia."

Olivia's eyes popped open and it was only then that she realised she had closed them. Her mouth opened, and a smart comment about to escape when instead she moved her body harder onto Alex's finger's and said, "Please, Alex."

"No, I think you should wait."

"Please, Alex."

"Not here, not now." She withdrew her hand, lightly passing her fingers over Olivia's clit before pulling her hand from her jeans. Alex started to button her fly as Olivia struggled not to moan, not to beg, not to throw herself at Alex, pin her to the side of the stall and fuck her. None of them were gentle desires so she chose instead to do nothing.

"Yes, Alex."

"Do up your shirt." Alex opened the door to the stall and walked out. Olivia tried to tie the leather strips quickly but her sudden panic at Alex's departure left her clumsy. She stepped out of the stall to see Alex leaning against the wall. She shot Olivia a familiar toothy grin but her eyes didn't match the smile. They promised something else entirely.

"You really should come home with me, Olivia."

"Yes, Alex."

* * * * *

Alex wrapped the collar around Olivia's throat, carefully centering the D-ring in the middle of her neck. Olivia twisted her neck and shoulders‘, knowing the collar was neither too tight nor too loose. Alex moved away and perched on the arm of the sofa, watching as Olivia tried to stand casually in the centre of the floor. There was no conversation; no outpouring of feeling neither was sure she felt, no protests of friendship or fidelity. There was only clarity, the certainty of right action, of needs being met, drives sated. Alex spoke one word. "Strip."

She watched greedily as Olivia loosened the tie holding up her shirt and then pulled it from her jeans. She didn't hesitate as she pulled it away from her body and dropped it to the floor. Alex noted the slight movement of Olivia's breasts as she unbuttoned her jeans and started to pull them from her hips. Even from a distance and in the easy light of her living room Alex could see the sheen of sweat on Olivia's skin. Olivia pulled her jeans to her thighs and realised she was still in her boots and bent down to untie them. She kicked one, then the other off and the second flew across the room and hit the wall. "Sorry," Olivia muttered.

Alex rose and stood in front of her, and Olivia saw the smile ease across her lips. "It's okay, I like slapstick," she said, pulling Olivia's jeans and pants down, then providing a steadying hand as Olivia stepped out of them. Her hands rested on Olivia's hips and she stood and pulled their bodies together. "Funny has a place," she said as her hand slid from hip to pubic hair, slightly tugging. Olivia luxuriated in the sensation of vinyl on her skin and made no sound, merely bucked her hips against Alex's. Alex slid her hand over the lips of Olivia's cunt and smiled when she confirmed her suspicion of how much wetter Olivia was. "Of course, this is pretty serious too. You are seriously wet, Olivia." She whispered this last into her ear as she traced the terrain of it with her tongue, all the while rubbing her fingers over Olivia's outer lips. Olivia tried to remain calm but she felt herself starting to shake with desire. "Please Alex."
"Please what?"

"Please fuck me."

Alex chuckled and pulled herself away from her, only far enough to unzip enough to allow Olivia a first look at her breasts. "Would you like to touch them, Olivia?"

"Yes, Alex."

"Would you like to kiss them, lick them?" she asked, cupping her breasts, offering them to Olivia.

"Yes, Alex, very much."

"Then you should."

Olivia took the one step between them and brought her hands to Alex's breasts. She brought down her lips, laying a kiss on one and then the other. She took each nipple in turn, rolling it over her tongue, sucking slightly at first and then harder. Alex gripped Olivia's shoulders, her head back, revelling in the sensations sent by Olivia's tongue and teeth. "That's enough," she muttered. Olivia continued until she felt a hard sting on her ass and heard the crack of Alex's strike.

"I said that's enough," Alex said, grabbing a handful of Olivia's hair, pulling her head up until they made eye contact. "When I say that's enough, you stop, do you understand?"

"Yes, Alex, I'm sorry."

"But you were doing a very good job. Were you enjoying yourself?"

"Yes, Alex," Olivia whispered.

"Good, I think you'll enjoy this too," Alex said. She let go of Olivia's hair and traced her hand down Olivia's cheek. She then took her arm and led her into the bedroom. Olivia was split -- half-hoping Alex's teasing was about to end yet wanting more than a light slap and tickle. Alex turned her toward the wall and lifted her hands above her head. Olivia felt each leather restraint wrap around each wrist in turn, then they were hooked to the wall. Alex drew her hands down Olivia's arms, to her shoulders and laid a soft kiss between her shoulder blades. She kissed her way down her spine to her waist and brought her hands up Olivia's legs, easing them farther apart. Alex stood and Olivia heard her step away and the sound of a drawer opening.
"Do you remember your safe word Olivia?"

"Yes, Alex."

"Do you want to keep going?"

"Yes, Alex."

The first blow was light, and hit at the juncture of ass and thigh. The second was higher and harder and after that Olivia quickly lost count, caught in the sound of the lash on her skin, her own breathing until there was only sound. Alex was careful with the blows, watched the colour brighten in Olivia's skin, noted her tensing slightly before the fall of each blow and then relax.

There was a sound of movement behind her and Olivia felt the tendrils of the flogger strike across her shoulders. She was surprised to feel a new heat on her body. Slipping again into sound and sensation, Olivia tugged on her restraints.

"No need to tug on those, you know." And the flogger struck again, across her ass.

"I'm sorry."

She heard something, something fall to the floor, then felt hands on her shoulders; they rested there for a moment and she felt the press of another body into her back. The hands slid from her shoulders to her breasts. Strong fingers found her nipples and pinched them hard.

"You will be. Still enjoying yourself?"

"Yes, Alex."

Leaving the restraints on her wrists but detaching them from the wall, Alex turned Olivia around and wrapped her arms around her, careful to lay her arms between the rising welts on Olivia's shoulders and ass. She kissed her easily at first and then more strongly. Her lips still on Olivia's, Alex walked backward toward the bed; Olivia matched her steps. She fell back onto the bed and drew Olivia on top of her. She busied herself with Olivia's breasts, first taking each in hand as she broke from their kisses.
"You did very well, I'm pleased."
Olivia rested her hands on her shoulders and then dared to slide them down Alex's body to her breasts. Alex smiled. She took her nipple in her mouth and bit until Olivia gasped. Olivia grinned as Alex lay back and then she bent over and kissed Alex's sternum, then her breasts. She worked her way to her navel and started to unzip the rest of Alex's suit. Olivia saw she wore nothing underneath and traced the outer lips and quickly slipped two fingers inside her. Alex bucked against the fingers, lifting her hips off the bed. Olivia was more than willing to indulge and her boldness left Alex speechless. She eased herself down the bed and planted her mouth at the top of Alex's cunt. "After all, I should say thank-you, shouldn't I Alex?"

Alex simply grunted as Olivia lapped at her clit for the first time. Olivia assumed this was a yes. She caught the rhythm of Alex's hips with her right hand, and the thrust of her fingers brought a groan from Alex's throat. The sound sharpened when she added a third finger and drew deeper on her clit. Olivia grinned at the sight of Alex as she writhed, and knew by the contractions of muscle she felt on her fingers that Alex's orgasm was close. Olivia stopped moving completely. Shocked, Alex opened her eyes to see Olivia grinning at her from between her thighs.

"Did you want me to keep going, Alex?"

"I didn't tell you to stop."

"No, you didn't, Alex."

"So until I do, keep going."

Olivia laughed as she grabbed Alex's legs, pulling them apart and lifting them onto her shoulders. She pushed her fingers back inside and found that Alex was wetter still. She made long, slow strokes over Alex's clit and just as Olivia fought her own orgasm, Alex came, grinding her cunt into Olivia's mouth. Olivia sucked and licked until Alex quieted. She brought her hand to rest on the top of Olivia's head, and pushed her hair off of her forehead. Neither spoke nor moved for several minutes until Alex grabbed a handful of Olivia's hair and pulled her sharply away from her.

"Topping from below Olivia?"

"I was only saying thank-you, Alex." Olivia swallowed hard, trying to keep eye contact but struggling with the angle of her neck. Alex sat up, not releasing her grip. She grabbed Olivia's nipple with her free hand until she gasped, and then kept the pressure at that point as she spoke. "When I want you to do something Olivia, I'll tell you. Do you understand me?" Olivia could only nod her response, fighting the pain in her nipple that headed directly for her clit. Alex released her holds and Olivia struggled to stay in the same position. Alex slid out from underneath her and rose off the bed. Olivia shut her eyes and dropped her head onto the bed; she was afraid she had shattered the scene, and that Alex would simply tell her to dress and leave. She felt Alex get of the bed and walk away. She braced herself for what Alex was about to say.

Alex stood at the end of the bed and looked at Olivia: her ass and back still red, a few welts on her skin, her legs sprawled over the edge of the bed. She stepped closer until her legs were between Olivia's thighs. She bent over and pushed Olivia's legs further apart roughly until she could see the sheen of wetness on her thighs. Olivia edged her way further down the bed to bring her legs in closer contact with Alex's. Alex brought both her hands to rest on the back of each of her legs and trailed them up towards her cunt, then over her ass. Olivia groaned at the touch, then groaned louder still as Alex brought her hand down hard on her ass.

"What do you think is an appropriate number for a submissive who has taken too much initiative, Olivia?" she asked as she brought down her hand in another slap, on the other cheek of Olivia's ass. Olivia mumbled something into the bed and Alex slapped her again, in the same place as before, intensifying the pain. "I didn't hear you, Olivia. Speak up." Olivia lifted her head off the bed and tried to speak but another hit intervened. She tried again. "Whatever you think is best, Alex."

Alex laughed as she struck Olivia again. "That's the right answer Olivia. Glad you figured it out. Now do you think you can hold up for ten more, to please me Olivia?"

"Yes, Alex, to please you."

The words ran like an electric charge down Alex's spine. She took a step back from the bed to gain a better advantage and delivered the first blow. Olivia hissed out her breath. Alex alternated her blows over the whole of Olivia's ass as Olivia ground her hips into the bed, gasping, trying not to shout. When the tenth blow fell, Alex dropped to her knees and ran a series of kisses over her cheeks. Still kissing, she brought her hand to Olivia's cunt and easily slid two then three fingers inside her. Olivia bucked against the fingers so suddenly inside her. Alex fell into a steady rhythm, working her thrusts against Olivia's. "You see Olivia, when you're a good girl, you get a reward."

Olivia understood. The tension in her body was centered on Alex's fingers and she knew that she would do almost anything to please Alex at the moment, simply to release the orgasm that had been growing in her since the bathroom at the bar. She pushed herself harder against Alex until she responded and added another finger.

"You're going to be a good girl and ask before you come, aren't you, Olivia?"

"Yes, Alex."

"Good," Alex replied and brought her other hand to Olivia's clit. She lightly circled it with her hand and then Olivia felt Alex's tongue slide down from her fingers to her clit. She sucked on it lightly and then started quick licks on each side. She brought her lips over her teeth and bit lightly and that sensation alone almost brought Olivia over the edge. Alex continued to lick and thrust and Olivia's whole body began to shake.

"Please, Alex, may I come now?"

"Yes, Olivia."

Alex eased herself out and away from Olivia's body once her orgasm slowed. She climbed back onto the bed and gathered Olivia into her arms, kissing her intensely.

Olivia clung to Alex like a limpet, wrapped her arms around Alex's waist and held her like something lost only just found. Alex lay back on the bed and Olivia rested on her chest, bringing her hand up to cup one of Alex's breasts. They rested, sated.

Alex brought the duvet up to cover them.

"So should I say something smart to break the mood, Alex?" Olivia asked.

"I don't think so. You're staying for the night?"

Olivia nodded. Alex kissed her forehead.

"Should I ask the obligatory questions?"

"Like what?" Alex asked, brushing a stray hair from Olivia's forehead.

"What about work, what about tomorrow morning?"

Alex shrugged. "Tomorrow morning we get breakfast and go to work. Beyond that, it's up to us." She kissed Olivia again, and then turned off the light.