Actions

Work Header

gotham : a conspiracy thread

Chapter Text

t(i wanna die)m 
@nightwingsass

i touched nightwing’s ass once, and immediately
made a fan account. i'm not actually batman. 

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://batdrake.tum…

 

1,236 following      164.8k followers

 

 

pinned tweet 📍

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

saw a conspiracy that i was batman, and i 
would like to publicly state that i'm not 
actually batman... which is what batman
would also say, so believe me if you want. 

3:32 AM • May 10, 2018 • Twitter for iPhone

2.4k Replies  25k Retweets     435k Likes

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

happy two year anniversary of the day that
@cryptidwayne followed me & told me that he
didn't actually die and get replaced with a look 
alike.

6:32 PM • May 9, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

26 Retweets     4k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

legend has it if you whisper orphan three times
in front of a mirror with all the lights off bruce
wayne will come and adopt you

2:50 PM • May 9, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

12k Retweets     118k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m retweeted

Jason Todd-Wayne @cryptidwayne
"@stephbrown: y'all ever just thank god that
bruce wayne didn't 
adopt you." fuck you. 

 

 


 

 

 

Tim Drake
@timjdrake

Timothy Drake, future CEO of Drake Inc.

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://catherinetoddfound...

120 following      64.2k followers

 

pinned tweet 📍

Tim Drake @timjdrake

I'm hosting an adoption day at the
@GothamHumaneSociety Sunday June 2nd, 
we're hoping to home a lot of animals that day.
so please come out and join us more
information here. bit.ly/1432234

3:20 PM • May 9, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

12k Retweets     118k Likes

 


 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

i haven't done a conspiracy thread in while, 
what do y'all want to hear about today???????

16% voted Is Superman A Clone? 
43% voted The Truth About Bruce Wayne
23% voted What Happened to the first Batgirl
18% voted The Court of Owls

this poll has ended

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

jokes on everyone who chose truth about bruce
because y'all were sick of clone theories cause 
It's still a clone theory. 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

so alright without further ado let's fuckin do this,
the truth about bruce wayne, a conspiracy thread (1/??) 

2:14 AM • May 10, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

2.4k Replies  32.5k Retweets     635.2k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

so this conspiracy actually starts the night of the
murder of Martha & Thomas Wayne by Joe Chill
(which i also have conspiracies about if y'all
want to hear those). (2/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

Bruce Wayne had actually died that night, and
bc of all the money & influence the Wayne's had
on Gotham, the government needed at least one
of them alive (3/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

bc the news of the Wayne's death had already 
reached the public, they decided it would be
bruce bc he was still a child, they wouldn't
have include him by name if he had died 
(4/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

there was also a john doe matching bruce's 
description & age that had been found shot
to death a few streets away from crime alley
(actual bruce?) (5/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

also @ older gothamites who lived pre-wayne
death, was it called crime alley back then or 
did the wayne's death inspire it??? cause i'm
p sure it was like called the park row tragedy
or smth in the papers (6/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

anyways back to the conspiracy, was young
bruce wayne was replaced with a clone to 
keep the wayne enterprises afloat and to 
eventually become .... (7/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

Batman! that's right, the bruce wayne we
know and love, isn't actually bruce wayne at all.
he's actually someone the gov. had made to
become a superhero (same as superman)
(8/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

and now we get to the proof. 
* bruce wayne mysteriously vanished for three
years only to come back mere weeks before 
batman made his first appearance. (9/??)

 

 t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

the official story was that he was studying 
abroad, but during that time he would've 
conceived damian, the son of the daughter
of known "bad guy" R'as Al Ghul (10/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

what was bruce wayne doing with the
daughter of the "demon head", y'know
the guy who runs a league of assassins,
probably batman training. (11/??) 

 

 t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

* right around the time bruce wayne took in
lil' flying dick grayson, the first robin appeared
soon after. (12/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

all of y'all responding "first robin?" get the fuck 
outta here, it's 2019 and y'all still think there's
only one robin??? fuck sake, robin was a blond
girl for like a whole week. (13/??)

Image result for robin! steph

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

anyway, back to theory. the amount of kids
bruce wayne has always directly correlates w/
how many bats there are. (14/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

minus the batgirls, who's sole purpose
are to shit on batman's career. I stan,
am i a nightwing stan or a batgirls
stan idk?? (15/??) 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

batman also will slightly change in 
apearance, as in varying sizes, and the 
way he fights, and this different bat
always appears when bruce is 
out of town (16/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

in conclusion, bruce wayne died the same
night his parents died and he was replaced
by a government made being to come the
batman and all of "bruce's" kids are (17/??)

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
responding to @nightwingsass

also government made children that are
training up to be the next batman. if you're
reading this pls don't kill me batman (18/18)

2:54 AM • May 10, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

53.5k Retweets     745.1k Likes

 


 

 

The very next night, nearing four am, Timothy Jackson Drake wakes in the middle of the night with the unsettling feeling that someone was watching him. Tim being Tim dismisses it with a long sigh, and an out loud thought of "Shut the fuck up paranoid Tim, we don't have the fucking time for this you edge-lord." And rolls over to go back to sleep. Now facing the large windows that overlook the city. 

 

Minutes later Tim is woken again, someone now standing right in front of him. He blinks twice, ultimately deciding it's just another bout of sleep paralysis and turns away. 

What the fuck you can't move during sleep paralysis? Tim heart beats out of his chest as he swings his arm around to his bed side table to find something to throw at the intruder. Unfortunately for him, the first thing he happened to grasp were his glasses. He hears them hit the window and clank against the floor and (most likely break) as the shadowy blob moves out of the way. (Tim would later learn that the blob didn't move at all, his aim was insanely off.) 

"Tim Drake." 

"Jesus Christ," Tim clutched the blankets to his chest like some 1800s maiden who'd been caught sleeping with the stable boy, "...Batman? This is a fucked up dream, I always imagined it'd be nightwing who'd come into my room late at night to ravish me."

 

Tim doesn't remember falling asleep but the next thing he knows he's waking up again just in time for 10am astrophysics class. 

 


 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

the real reason batman hasn't responded to my conspiracy
thread is because he's jared, 19.

9:54 AM • May 12, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

23k Retweets     120k Likes

 

 

Chapter Text

t(i wanna die)m 
@nightwingsass

i touched nightwing’s ass once, and immediately
made a fan account. i'm not actually batman. 

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://batdrake.tum…

 

1,236 following      342.8k followers

 

pinned tweet 📍

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

saw a conspiracy that i was batman, and i 
would like to publicly state that i'm not 
actually batman... which is what batman
would also say, so believe me if you want. 

3:32 AM • May 10, 2018 • Twitter for iPhone

4.2k Replies  32k Retweets     521.5k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

oh god. i just woke up to so many new
followers, i'm???? hello i guess??? 

4:32 PM • May 13, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

 

 

 

 

 

nina @batgirlsbitch
replying to @nightwingsass

you just woke up???
it's 4:30 gotham time, I-

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
replying to @batgirlsbitch

i'm a college student that didn't have
classes today :))) you should be
surprised i'm awake now.

 

sasuke @grxxnxrrxw
replying to @nightwingsass

yo they featured you in a buzzfeed
article that's probs why.
https://bit.ly/2HwoPzd

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

the real reason batman hasn't responded to my
conspiracy thread is because he's jared, 19.

 

scroll down to view more. 

 


 

 

Not that Tim doesn't love his parents, because he does love them very much. It's just spending long periods of time with Janet and Jack Drake can be quite overwhelming. Even more so since the divorce. 

 

The story of Jack and Janet Drake is pretty simple in the grand scheme of things. Jack and Janet had been business partners for quite some time, and friends for even longer. There had been a brief flicker of love (probably lust) between the two and they'd became each other's bed mates for some weeks. Janet ended up becoming pregnant and they'd decided to marry to satiate their parents (and high society Gotham.)

They lived in a (romantically) loveless marriage for years and had filed for divorce before Tim was even finished packing his bags for college. Then when the accident had happened (almost two years ago now) they'd both enthusiastically moved on on their own. Tim has a soon to be new step-mom who went to the same elementary school as him (she was in 6th grade when he was in 1st) and his mother has a string of lovers in Brazil, Italy, France, and Spain. Their relationship while divorced is infinitely better than it ever was when they were ever together, and Tim couldn't be happier for them. 


However, they are still Jack and Janet Drake. So he has to listen to lots of rants about his father's archaeology trips that doesn't understand in the slightest, and deal with his moms inability to not tell him that he needs a haircut, no matter the fact that it's not even that long mom. Then add in Dana into the mix, where Tim doesn't know whether to talk to her like a potential parental figure or how he talks to his peers considering she's only five years older than him. So it's usually turns into awkward conversations where he pretends to watch Grey's Anatomy and she pretends to know who Hatsune Miku is. 

So it's safe to say he was less than enthused to go to this family dinner tonight.

Even more so when his mother starts asking about his summer plans, she didn't need to know that he planned spending the summer not wearing pants, catching up on all the anime school had made him miss out on and finally hack into batman's to discover his true identity.

But he couldn't say nothing, cause she'd try to sweep him away on some trip in Europe where he has to make awkward eye contact with the men that leave his mother's bedroom in the morning, cause he hadn't gone to bed yet and was awake long enough to be hungry again and the men felt entitled to make some type of conversation.

Please dude, don't talk to me, I don't want it, don't make this more awkward than it needs to be, he'd try to say with his eyes but none of them would ever really get the picture. 

"Uh, I was gonna talk to Gavin, about working at the office this summer. You know, CEO training and all that." Is what he says, and he immediately regrets it, you fucking dumbass Tim, because that means he now actually has to talk to Gavin because that's the type of shit his parents would look into.

Why didn't he just say he was spending the summer in Kansas visiting his singular friend Conner, cause they'd eventually leave him alone for the summer because there's no chance of him getting some poor girl knocked up if they thought he was back together with Kon.

Which they weren't ever really together, Kon is straight, that had simply been a deciding point in Tim's life that he was more than bi-curious and Kon deciding he was not. His parents just happened to come home at a really unfortunate moment. 

"Don't bother Gavin, that man is busy enough. He doesn't need the stress of dealing with you for the summer. Speaking of which, remind me to send me fruit basket," Janet says tucking a strand of honey brown hair behind her ear, a grimace on her red stained lips as she takes a sip of wine older than her son, "I was asking because I spoke to Lucius Fox recently and they're taking in a few interns for the summer, and I think you should apply." Please, the only way I'd work with Bruce is if I was applying for the position of Robin.

"I mean, are you sure?" Tim asks nervously chewing on the end of the plastic straw, before quickly moving away realizing the disapproving look on his mother's face, "Wouldn't it be bad business working with our number one competitors?"

Jack scoffs, "Bruce is a old time friend, I'm sure he'd teach you everything he know. You'd be crazy to miss this opportunity." 

Before Tim could come up with a logical reason for him not to do it that wasn't 'But what about the new season of Attack on Titan', Dana was speaking to him. 

"Hey, Besides you could totally investigate all those conspiracy theories you have about the Wayne's." The fact that his dad is married to someone who unironically uses the word totally wasn't completely lost on him, but it was overshadowed by the fact that she was 100 percent right.

"Yeah, I'll email my application to Lucius." He said, and actually meant it. 

 

 


 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass

today i will be presenting my #batsona,
furries please do not interact.

8:43 PM • May 13, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

so my batsona's name would be shrike. 
not the usual bat-agnst y'know but 
shrike's are pretty badass.

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

but i am, uhm on the shorter size, so like
tiny murder, bird hell yeah! 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

or maybe a kiwi, they look pretty
hardcore??? like those long ass 
beaks??? 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

imagine you're a villain and you get
pummeled by this short ass dude 
wearing a furry costume called
kiwi, think about it. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

ahfsliufd imagine being one of the 
first people to get your ass kicked 
by batman. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

it was uh, it was a man with a bat 
on his chest and like dog ears on his
mask.. i mean might've been bat ears
but i'm not sure what bat ears look 
like. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

and like yeah, it's okay dude,
batman clearly doesn't either. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

anyway back to the #batsona,
i, kiwi, would have a suit that
literally is furry as hell, and 
like carry a fucking sword. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

y'know representing their long ass 
nose, which i won't get over. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

and just stab villains with it. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

for all of y'all calling that unheroic,
little robin has a sword and i would've
went with penguin, but that's already taken.

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

or canary, and i could've made a machine
to project my voice to unsettling frequencies
like a canaries cry but that's already taken
too. 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass
replying to @nightwingsass

anyway drop your batsona's cause i wanna
hear what fucking monstrosities y'all come
up with. 

 

 


 

 

 

to: luciusfox@wayne.ent
subject: W.E. Summer Internships

Dear Lucius,

I would like to formally apologize if this email is received past the application dates, my mother had just informed me of the internship at dinner tonight.  
I've attached my application if you're still receiving applications. Thank you 

Sincerely, 
Tim. 

 

Timothy Jackson Drake
timothy.drake@drake.inc
(212) ***-****

 

 

 see attached : Application.dox

 

re: W.E Summer Internships

 

Hey Lucius, 

uh sorry uhm I accidentally attached the wrong document. Please don't read it. Just like ignore it completely. Like for the sake of my dignity and yours. Thanks. 

Also, mom and I still hope to see you, Tam and Tanya for lunch this weekend. 

Thanks again, 
Tim.

 

see attached : Actual Application Pls Don't Read the Other One.dox

 


 

Application

Reasons I Should Be the Next Robin 

 

Dear, Mr. Batman Sir,

I should be appointed the next robin. Although, I fear I've already out grown the robin title. Much like Robins I, II, and III I however am very attached to the Robin title so i would like to go with a similar title. Red Robin, which is sticking to the theme more than Robins I & II, I mean, Nightwing is pretty creative, but why did Robin II go with the first known alias of the joker, some sort of personal vendetta. But honoring the fact, that he was my robin, I.e, the one I looked up to the most, and who'd saved me himself, I've chosen to honor his titles from Red Hood and Robin the boy wonder. 

Now for why, I'm qualified for this job. Well, Mr. Batman sir, I'm very determined. Sure, I'm not in the best shape and I've never jumped from rooftop to rooftop before but i'm very skilled with a computer and i could practically be your eyes in the sky,. oh wait, that's oracle. Huh, bet you thought i didn't know about her, well I do. Even more so the point I should be hired. I mean, I clearly am good at my job if i could even figure that out. and I think you could teach me all the necessary things to be properly equipped for the vigilante lifestyle. I mean I already have the odd sleep schedule. Sure, I'm not an orphan, since i know those are your type ;), but like hey, I could pretend. And with my familt being out of country so frequently it's pretty much the same thing. 


Anyways, I would love to be hired on as the next Robin, or even the next oracle. 

Sincerely, 

(future) Red Robin. 

 

p.s. how fucking dope does red robin sound. y'know like i can even meme it and just start going "yumm" at people

p.p.s thanks for considering batman sir. 

 


 

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass

akjshfdlkjahfd you guys,,,, i just sent in a joke
application i made to be the next robin to an 
actual professional job summer internship
application thing on accident. i'm crying,

3:43 AM • May 14, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

22k Retweets     121.5k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass

what strain of weed will make me forget this
ever happened omg asdkjl fsalkjfd hsa
my mom is gonna murder me in public

3:46 AM • May 14, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

22k Retweets     121.5k Likes

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass

 

update: just drank like five four loko's and
sent a follow up email with the proper
application attached. prayer circle that this
man doesn't read the first one. 

3:52 AM • May 14, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m  @nightwingsass

 

lmao @ everyone saying why the fuck did you 
drink five four loko's do you want to die,
yes i fucking do bethany!!!  

3:56 AM • May 14, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

 

Chapter Text

t(i wanna die)m 
@nightwingsass

i touched nightwing’s ass once, and immediately
made a fan account. i'm not actually batman. 

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://batdrake.tum…

 

1,236 following      352.1k followers

 

pinned tweet 📍

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass

saw a conspiracy that i was batman, and i 
would like to publicly state that i'm not 
actually batman... which is what batman
would also say, so believe me if you want. 

3:32 AM • May 10, 2018 • Twitter for iPhone

4.2k Replies  32k Retweets     521.5k Likes

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

what the fu ck !!!! i GOT THE FUCKINJG
JOB ASODSAHGKDSFHGAD Y'ALLL !!!!!

1:19 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

denkichu @ironstarks
replying to @nightwingsass

'grats bro 

 

kon💥 @superboii
replying to @nightwingsass

lkjfdsfdhg ik u already told
me but like still akjdsfaf ur 
life is wild 

 

nina @batgirlsbitch
replying to @nightwingsass

leak the robin application
bitch,, we need to read it,
it must've been bomb for
you to still have gotten the
job 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
replying to @batgirlsbitch

sfdkjgkhlskjfhgsfd dm me 
and i'll link you dskjflfg. 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

like yeah, someone could walk up to me
and say, Keanu Reeves is batman and I
would believe them wholeheartedly.

2:37 AM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

was i wrong this whole fucking time????

2:36 AM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

whoaaaaa, is Keanu Reeves batman???

2:36 AM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 

i just fought god in a batburger parking lot.
could've just been Keanu Reeves though. 

2:34 AM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

scroll down to view more.

 


 

 

twinkothy 
 Y'ALL HOLY FUCK 
KJHFHGIREUHGEIU

twinkothy
dJAHJSAF I GOT
tHE FUCKINGF JOB

konair 
adjkasfds u'r fuckin
kidding fkdsjhskj 

brat
this 100% proves 
that bruce wayne is 
batman there's no way
he'd hire u otherwise. 

lesbib
or good all fashion
nepotism?? 

twinkothy
yea probably

brat
valid

lesbib
congrats anyway
Timmy !!! 

twinkothy
pls don't call
me timmy :))))

konair
ye for sure
timmy :)))) 

konair
hey clark is goin
to gotham next week
i think i can tag along
if u want >:))))))

twinkothy
no, my appartment
is a straight people
free zone :)))) 

konair
i'll be there monday

brat
yo can i come


 twinkothy
ofc u've never
done anything 
wrong in ur 
life ever and we 
all love you. 

lesbib
big agree

lesbib
bart is too 
good for us. 

brat
thanks guys :')

brat 
love you too

brat
timmy >:))))

 

twinkothy has left the groupchat

 


 

 

 

Tim Drake
@timjdrake

Timothy Drake, future CEO of Drake Inc.

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://catherinetoddfound...

120 following      64.2k followers

 

pinned tweet 📍

Tim Drake @timjdrake

I'm hosting an adoption day at the
@GothamHumaneSociety Sunday June 2nd, 
we're hoping to home a lot of animals that day.
so please come out and join us more
information here. bit.ly/1432234

3:20 PM • May 9, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

12k Retweets     118k Likes

 

Tim Drake @timjdrake

Excited to announce that I've been accepted for
a summer internship at W.E. this summer. 
Thank you for letting me do this, and I'm ready
to learn all you have to teach me @BruceWayne.

2:20 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 


 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

@ everyone asking me to make a youtube
channel to post my conspiracies, uh no. 
i'm not exposing myself as being attached to
this account sjfdjfd

6:19 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

but since so many of y’all are like damn, ur life
is really just like this, uhh, yes it fucking is
fjskskskd have a fucking story time. 

6:20 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

idk if y’all know this, but I am a very dumb, very
very gay 19 year old boy. ok like I’m bi, but that
means I love and respect all women and dick grayson. 

6:21 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

so last year, when I was barely 18, I did what all
dumb gay 18 year olds do, I went to a fucking
party drank till I threw up and made out with
some ‘straight’ guy. 

6:22 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

i'm not being trash by saying 'straight' just 
letting y'all know at the time he considered 
himself to be straight, and was still figuring
out shit.

6:23 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

has since come out as gay, and has even asked
me on a date a few times, but like he's not my
type,,, and by that i mean, he's like too nice 
sdjhflsadjf 

6:24 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

anyway,, back to the story. we're at the party,
and like it's the nice part in the outskirts of
gotham that's not really Gotham but it is.

6:25 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

and it's like a bunch of teenagers having a
bonfire and like under*ge drinking and shit
but also it's rich kids so someone's probably
snorting coke or some shit. 

6:26 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

and someone calls the fucking police! y'know
like fuck them kids, rebecca not in my good
catholic neighborhood. 

6:27 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

and lo and behold, the police show up
and people are running around like crazy
all of my friends dip and i'm left there
looking like a dumb high jackass. 

6:28 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

which i probably was, like if you're
gonna make dumb decisions might as well
get cross faded. 

6:29 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

but guess who the fuck comes up to me!!!
detective fine ass grayson.

6:31 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

look i know he's not a detective get the fuck
out of my responses, police officer sounds
dumb as fuck, when you look that good ok.

6:33 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

me, being, the dumb faded gay that i was,
i wouldn't miss my shot ok. like never miss
a shot ok. like never.

6:35 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

what would kobe do? (not that i know who i
kobe is, but i could hear my best friend's 
voice in my mind saying that.)

6:35 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

so i shoot my fuckin shot, 18 year old,
drunk, high, gay, depressed me, looks 
at this beautiful fucking man and deadass
goes

6:36 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

"arrest me sir, i've been a really really
bad boy."

6:36 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

or something equally embarrassing and
cringey

6:37 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

and he's staring at me like he recognizes
me, and i put my arms behind my back
cause i want this man to [redacted] me 
on his [redacted] y'know. 

6:38 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

then he fucking does! arrest me that is, 
he's laughing the whole fucking time he 
cuffs me, and he puts me in the car and
says something to the other officers there.

6:39 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

now that i think back to it he was probably
saying that he knows me and is taking my 
dumbass home.  

6:40 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

so we're driving for awhile and i'm talkin
shit y'know, cause i wanna get laid, y'know
just saying shit about him taking me back
to his house to [redacted]

6:41 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

and then he calls me by my fucking 
childhood nickname, that i hate w/ a
burning passion, but it like sounds 
nice when he says it so i'm not too 
pressed.

6:42 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

he's basically like, "yeah kid, we're
not gonna do that. i'm gonna take you
home and you can tell your mom what 
you were doing."

6:43 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

boner instantly killed, and i'm suddenly 
having a mental breakdown in the back 
seat of a cop car with the man of my
dreams staring at me like i just lost
my mind.

6:44 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

cause apparently he didn't know my mom
was in the hospital and i explain that to him
after he'd finally managed to calm me 
down. 

6:45 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

which he did by pulling over on the side of the
road and cradling me in his arms in the 
backseat. can i just say he gives the 
best hugs in the whole world. 

6:46 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
responding to @nightwingsass

moral of the story is that i would die for
dick grayson.

6:48 PM • May 17, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

 


 

 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense

wait guys,, i think i know
who @nightwingsass is.

2:22 AM • May 18, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

gonna take a note from his book and make
a conspiracy thread. 

2:23 AM • May 18, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

@nightwingsass' is tim drake,
a conspiracy thread. 

2:24 AM • May 18, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

Chapter Text

noah ❀
@noahfense

virgo, 19. chem major at gotham u

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://catherinetoddfo....

 

392 following      4,521 followers

 

pinned tweet 📍

noah ❀ @noahfense

since y'all are looking at my account
cause of the @nightwingsass conspiracy
here are some shelters for lgbt youth
you should donate to in gotham 

9:32 AM • May 20, 2018 • Twitter for iPhone

1k Retweets     3.5k Likes

 


 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense

wait guys,, i think i know
who @nightwingsass is.

2:22 AM • May 18, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

gonna take a note from his book and make
a conspiracy thread. 

 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

@nightwingsass' is tim drake,
a conspiracy thread.

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

so, i went to the same high school as tim,
like we sat next to each other in chemistry in
sophmore year and he like slept the entire class
or watched anime in the back row.  

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

and one day he like offered me one of his
headphones and we watched blue exorcist
together, true weeb solidarity. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

anyways after that we became p close friends,
which leads me to believe that he's @nightwingsass

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

if there's one thing tim drake loves more than
weed and coffee it's conspiracy theories. 
(sometimes anime.) 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

like if you've ever talked to this guy
he could convince you that government
created corn for like population control
or some shit. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

and the weird ass theories on @nightwingsass
has tim drake energy all over them. like? the
one about that missing pilot being green  
lantern? tim drake is written all over it. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

now that i've stated my original thoughts, 
here's some proof (sorry i have no clue 
how to do these theories guys.) 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

so, in start the whole dick grayson 
story time is what really solidified it
so we'll start there. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

i had left before the cops had showed,
but i heard all about it at school the 
next day. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

and mandy told me that tim got 
arrested, which i callled bullshit
he's got a clean record they would't 
actually arrest him for that. 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

since he wasn't at school i texted him
and told me what happened. which 
is an exact recant of what happened

( see attached image ) 

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense 

which lines up perfectly with what
@nightwingsass tweeted about their
expirence w/ dick grayson / the party

 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

and has anyone noticed at the same
time @nightwingsass talks about the
whole application mishaps and getting
the job, tim also announces getting
accepted into an internship w/ W.E.

 

denkichu @ironstarks
replying to @noahfense

if u're friends wit tim y 
r u exposing him? 

noah ❀ @noahfense
responding to @noahfense

we were friends, and then 
he fucked my boyfriend :) 

 

Lacey @batmen
responding to @noahfense

Image result for and i oop gif

 

 


 

 

13 times Tim Drake 'Nightwingsass' was a Mood

" We stan this nightwing stan. " 

 

Posted on May 22, 2019 at 2:10 PM.

 

On Saturday night a twitter user, Noah Bernacki (@noahfense), a 19 year old student at University of Gotham (Gotham U) posted a thread about who she theorized the owner of the iconic account '@nightwingsass' is. And well, we've got to agree with that theory. Tim Drake or @nightwingsass have yet to respond and make a statement on the theory, which has well over five hundred thousand likes so there isn't a chance they haven't seen it, Confirmation of ownership?

 

Either way the owner has some iconic moments that were 100% a mood. 

 

1.  That time he contemplated what he'd be willing to do for extra credit

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass 
if i cry enough will my professor 
not fail me or should i like just 
suck his dick or like both idk i
got options. 

 

2.  Catwoman's Leather Thigh High Heeled Boots, enough said.

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
i know i'm like a nightwing stan and
i'm all about like justice or whatever
but like catwoman if you see this pls
step on me in those leather thigh
highs please. 

 

3.  Which led to him thinking up new costume designs for Nightwing.

 

 

t(i wanna die)m @nightwingsass
coULD Y'ALL FUCKING IMAGINE
NIGHTWING IN THOSE THIGH HIGHS
I- 

yes, we really really could. 

 

 

 click to read more

 


 

 

teafaerie:
non gotham trying to figure out
what the fuck is going on

Related image

wlwbatgirl rebbloged
gotham is trending because of tim drakes thirst for nightwing
i love 20biteen. 

 

beyoncesassisamericasass reblogged

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

mattyheelies posted

i love how the internet is losing their shit over the fact that a rich asian twink is running a nightwing stan account, meanwhile i'm having a fucking aneurysm over the fact that gotham is a real place. like wow y'all really like fucking live that??? how are y'all even alive???? 

wlwbatgirl reblogged: 

batman and spite. mostly batman. 

 

 

 


 

"You fucked her boyfriend!" Cassie shrills with laughter on the other side of the line, Tim grimaces at the amused smirks at Kon and Bart who sat across from him on his truly disgusting if it could even be called a couch. 

Tim groans and runs a hand down his face, "We didn't actually have sex, I gave him a subpar handy in the backseat of his truck and then he cried." 

 His three friends burst into laughter, Tim was pretty sure Bart might actually choke with how hard he was laughing. His entire body moving with the force, well he's always in constant motion so it could just be him being him.  He hits the end call, he'd rather get ridiculed by two idiots, than three. 

"Why did he cry? Was it that bad?" Kon asks after he's calmed enough to actually get words out. 

Tim slid down on the floor, that was surprisingly clean for once. (Tim's definition of clean at least, there weren't plates or cups on the floor, therefore clean.)  

"No, it wasn't that bad, probably good old catholic guilt or something." His friends laugh again, and he sighs like a teenage girl in a 2003 disneychannel original movie, "Guys that's not the point. I don't know what to do. Like everyone knows I run the fucking account. My mother is actually going to murder me. Janet Drake is gonna fucking murder me and get away with it. She'll like dress in that one black coat that's been sitting in her closet forever, and those big ass shades."

Kon cuts him off with his own input on his mom's potential funereal wear, "And those big ass pearls, she's been saving those for a special occasion."

Tim ignores him and goes back to his rant, "She'll play the role of grieving mother and everyone will fall for it because she's such a fucking actress. God. I mean it's not like i'm not ready to die, but then my dad will be sad, and I don't want him to have to deal with the stress of hiding the fact that mom murder me. His blood pressure is pretty high, he can't deal with that stress and planning the funereal would like kill him, y'know?" He pauses for a second, he breathes for the first time in over a minute like he forgot that he was supposed to and that his body required it to function. It's not like Tim often thought about what was best for his body, the mug sitting an inch away from him half full of coffee and a fourth of vodka and five hour energy was an testament to that.

Like a little Tim inside of his mind flipped a switch, he started speaking again, "Will you get Dick Grayson to come to my funeral please? No, actually no, I couldn't ever have him crying over me, he's too pretty to cry. Like I think I would like actually nut on spot if I ever see him cry. Whoa, whoa, whoa wait. Whoa, do I have crying kink, is that like a thing?"

Kon and Bart answer at the same time, "Yes it is." "Dude you're not gonna die." 

Tim took a swig of his death brew in the cheesy ass nightwing mug Kon bought him when he was still a decent friend. "But what the fuck am I supposed to do? Like people know it's me I can't like avoid it. She literally pulled up text messages."

Kon, being his best friend, and a literal asshole, says, "You should've thought about that before giving her boyfriend a shitty hand job." 

"How about you just take a break from social media. This whole thing will blow over eventually." Sweet, sweet Bart. Tim wishes sixteen year old him had better taste in boys, he and Bart would've been amazing together. 

"Right, yeah I can do that. I think." 

"Cool, now hand me a controller and prepare to get your ass beat." 

 Tim and Kon snicker at the same time and chirp, "Phrasing." 


 

twinkothy retweeted

twinkothy @nightwingsass

omg omg omg i just touched nightwings 
ass, i can die now. pls and thank you. 
i've reached my peak in life. 

3:32 AM • July 13, 2016 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass 

that's where this all started and i'll fucking
stand by it. 

1:32 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass 

y'all : tim drake is @nighwingsass
me, an intelluctual: tim drake is masked
vigilante kiwi, alexa send fucking tweet. 

1:34 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass 

since this is like out there, i would like to 
thank not only god, but batman himself, 
that my mom doesn't know how to use
twitter. 

1:35 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass 

anyways, happy fucking pride babes, better
not catch any straights in gotham or i'll meet 
you in my fur suit with the fucking sword
in the batburger parking lot. 

1:38 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass 

since i'm back, let's get back into the swing of
things, vote for the next conspiracy/story time

a) the court of owls

b) my robin application

c) the story behind wonder woman

d) superman isn't actually an alien. 

2:08 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

Chapter Text

twinkothy
@nightwingsass

i touched nightwing’s ass once, and immediately
made a fan account. tim drake for robin 2k19

📍 Gotham, NJ 🔗 http://batdrake.tum…

 

1,561 following      566.9k followers

 

 

pinned tweet 📍

twinkothy @nightwingsass

saw a conspiracy that i was batman, and i 
would like to publicly state that i'm not 
actually batman... which is what batman
would also say, so believe me if you want. 

3:32 AM • May 10, 2018 • Twitter for iPhone

2.4k Replies  25k Retweets     435k Likes

 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

since i'm back, let's get back into the swing of
things, vote for the next conspiracy/story time

34% voted the court of owls
16% voted my robin application
10% voted the story behind wonder woman
40% voted superman isn't actually an alien

this poll has ended

2:08 AM • June 1, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 


 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales

i love how y'all are all acting shocked,
that tim just like 100% embraced this
and just went back to theories like
that isn't the most tim drake thing
to do. 

9:15 PM • June 2, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

28 Retweets  172 Likes

 

denkichu @ironstarks
replying to @smilesmorales

i don't live in gotham, i know
nothing about tim drake besides
his thirst for dick. 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
replying to @ironstarks

i really can't tell if you mean
dick grayson, or like, dick...
either way mo o d.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales

uh, but for non-gotham/people
who haven't met tim drake
here are some of my tim stories. 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

so i also,, go to gotham u
like every other person on this 
hell site apparently.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

and had officially met tim in a 
study group freshman year, and 
we had found out we were going
to the same concert so he invited
me to hang w his friends

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

it was gorillaz btw

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

anyway, i meet his friends, and 
i've heard him like talking about them
before so i was expecting like a group
of nerdy dumbasses, but lo and behold

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

they're all stupidly hot and could
clearly kick my ass.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

LIKE, YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS STUPIDLY 
TALL HOT AS HELL PUNK DUDE IN A 
LEATHER JACKET IN THE MIDDLE OF SPRING
BREAK COSPLAYS AND PLAYS DND.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

also i had a convo w/ him by his self when
everyone went to bathroom i had asked
how old he was cause he has one of those
faces where you really cant tell

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

he literally just goes "idk i'm baby"
like ,,, mood. anyway back to tim 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

so we're at the concert and having a 
good time when tim just suddenly 
starts crying. for no reason.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

and i looked at his friends super
alarmed because i've never seen him
show emotion besides pure chaotic 
energy.

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

like it wasn't sobbing or anything just
like silent tears streaming down his face
but he's still like singing and awkwardly
bouncing to the music. 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

"is he okay?" i ask hot blonde girl 
and she just laughs and goes
"yeah, he does this at every concert
since hatsune miku." 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @smilesmorales

i, was clearly, confused, like, 
someone please come get your kid. 

 

sara  @sarawithoutanh
responding to @smilesmorales

Is the hot blonde girl Stephanie Brown?
Cause boy do I have a story about
Steph and Tim. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

shyla 🌼 @smilesmorales
responding to @sarawithoutanh

No her name wasn't Stephanie,
but please share the story. 

 

sara  @sarawithoutanh
responding to @smilesmorales

 

I'm at work rn but I'll definitely share it later. 

 


 

 

Steph 🍆 
@stephbrown

Will send feet pics for 500 dollars. 

📍 Gotham, NJ  🔗 http://catherinetoddfound...

120 following      64.2k followers

 

Steph 🍆 @stephbrown

and I literally mean little, he's 
barely 5'4.

4:32 PM • June 4, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

10k Retweets     143k Likes

 

Steph 🍆 @stephbrown

I have like twelve hundred tim 
drake stories. what would y'all 
like to know about the little nerd?

 4:31 PM • June 4, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

Steph 🍆 retweeted

Jason Todd-Wayne @cryptidwayne
"@nightwingsass: jason todd kicked my
ass once and i still have the scars to prove
it. don't try me i'll call my lawyers
Shut the fuck up you fell out of a tree
and cried cause my dog came to see if
you were okay.

11:32 AM • June 3, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 


 

 

Tim imagined this moment for years, this is how he thought it would go: 

 

Tim Drake stood in front of the Wayne manor, practicing his speech in his head again, 'Look Batman, you need a robin and I'm your guy.' Firm but not too demanding, it gets the point across. Bruce wouldn't answer the door when he arrived, obviously not. Alfred would be there and lead him down a long path of hallways, when he demanded asked politely to speak with Mr. Wayne. 

Mr. Wayne would be in his office doing paperwork or whatever it is he does when he's pretending not to be batman. Tim would state his case, that he knew he was batman, he's done the research. Mr. Wayne would deny it but Tim would come prepared. He'd bring a chart mapping out all the major injuries batman has had appeared to the time Wayne has left for "random business trips". When that would ultimately fail to prove his point Tim would bring out the recordings, the comparisons of the way Robin I moved and Dick Grayson. And when he finally had Bruce cornered he'd beg demand to be the new Robin, he's earned it. 

That is not how it goes. 

This is how it goes:

Tim is in an Ice Cream shop ten minutes before closing, wearing a sweater four sizes too big for him hair pulled back (into technically a bun??? even though most of it still hung around his face) quietly singing along to the song playing through his working headphone "I'm done chasing parties, I'm done chasing baddies, I'm done getting home past two." He's squinting at his laptop screen even though his glasses are sitting on the table two feet away from him. He knows he should probably leave but he's here enough at this time to be friends with the person who closes so she lets him stay after closing sometimes. 

He's debating getting up to get more ice cream when someone sits across from him. He squints at them, it's clearly not Sara, who's closing tonight. It's gotta be like a kid or something, it's face is quite pudgy. Perhaps a demon? 

The demon tuts before speaking, "Father really is a fool for thinking you know anything."

"Uh, Rude." Tim's not sure who's kid this is, but he knows everything thank you very much. "I know plenty, you tiny goblin." 

He hears a snicker from across the shop, followed by a voice he's all too familiar with, "Dami, what size do you want?" 

He chokes, Dick Grayson is here? While he looks like this, it's tragic really. 

"Father said I could have a large." The Goblin-demon replies, who is probably Damian Wayne, he should probably apologize and beg him not to tell his father so he doesn't lose the internship. 

"No I did not." Another voice comes in from his left, how did Tim not know they were here. He shoves his glasses back on and lets out a scared whimper seeing Bruce Wayne standing ominously in the corner, perhaps he was scarier than batman. It got worse when he smiled, "Timothy would you like some ice cream?" 

"Uh, no thank you. Sir, I uh actually have to get going they're closing pr-" Tim's cut off by Wayne.

"Dick get an ice cream for Timothy too."

Tim does want more ice cream, but should probably save his sanity and leave as soon as possible before he ruins his chances even more. But then he looks at Dick Grayson now that he can see, and wow, he's a weak man, cause he smiles at him and calls him Timmy and asks what kind of ice cream he'd like and Tim has to physically restrain himself from saying 'yours' and panics and says chocolate. He doesn't even like chocolate ice cream. But he smiles again and Tim is determined to eat it all. 

Dick walks to the counter to order from Sara, who's just as starry-eyed as Tim feels and he's left awkwardly sitting across from his new boss's son who he'd mistaken for goblin-demon, what it's Gotham? And his soon to be new boss, just saw him stare at his eldest sons ass and Tim would like to die now. 

"So, uh Mr. B-Wayne, Sir. I'm really excited to get the chance to work with you this s-" 

Bruce gives him an uncomfortable smile, like he'd rather be anywhere else but here, Tim could relate.  "Please Tom, no work talk with ice cream."

"Right," He closes his laptop and stuffs it haphazardly into his backpack to make room on the table for Dick returning with the ice cream. "And actually sir, it's Tim. But you, uh knew that. You called me Timothy twice, unless you thought my name was Tomothy, and I just misheard you. But that's a pretty unusual name and you'd have had to have read my application for me to get in. I mean, unless Lucius,  I mean Mr. Fox did all the work, which wouldn't surprise me hearing what people say about you.  Not that uhm, people say anything about you,  just uhm," He racks his brain for one nice thing he's heard people say about Bruce, "that you're an, okay dad. Fuck wait, that's not what I meant, fuck I didn't mean to say fuck in front of you or your goblin child. Fuuu-" 

"Eat the ice cream, Tom." Bruce says pushing the chocolate ice cream to him. 

"Yeah, okay Sir. " 

Damian gives his father an incredulous look, like he'd made the dumbest decision of his life hiring in Tim Drake, and he might just be fucking right. 

 


 

 

The Gazette @GothamGazette

Wayne's oldest, Richard Grayson
announces engagement to long-term
partner, Wallace West. Read their story
here. bit.ly/x2g53

6:32 PM • June 12, 2019 • Twitter for WebClient

291k Retweets     935k Likes

 

 

 

 

 

nina @batgirlsbitch
replying to @GothamGazette

idk where @nightwingsass is
rn, but i know he's crying. i 
just know it. 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
replying to @batgirlsbitch 

i'm :) happy :) for :) him :) 

 

 

 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

it goes against my moral code to 
thirst after a married man, so like
if anyone like wants to date me
pls do so now. :) 

6:35 PM • June 12, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

guysss, i"m really drunk ugly
cryng lsitenig to 'heartache'
by one ok rock, send hlp[

1:20 AM • June 13, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy retweeted

 

nina @batgirlsbitch

dick grayson: *gets enaged*
@nightwingsass : sO THIS
IS HEART ACHE!

1:31 AM • June 13, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

all of y'all are like, wow why're you crying
over dick grayson when you've still got
nightwing, and youre' right i fuckin stan
y'all sm;

2:22 AM • June 13, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

4.6k Retweets     12k Likes

 


 

 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

alright, bitches, i'm back.
with conspiracy theories dumber
than ever.

11:47 PM • June 14, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

2.4k Replies  25k Retweets     435k Likes

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

y'all voted and we're gonna talk
about who the fuck superman is.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

before y'all even start, no
I don't think bruce wayne is
superman, i've seen that theory.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

but, someone involved in that theory
is in fact the real superman.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

so y'all know that reporter that always,
does interviews w/ superman.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

he's superman. that's it. that's
theory.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

ok but for real, there are two reporters
that have actually interviewed superman
besides the whole shoving a camera in
his face when he's out doing superman
stuff.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

but tim? what does this have to do with
the theory that superman isn't actually
an alien. patience, my child.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

before working for the daily planet,
Clark Kent went on a road to self
discovery traveling the world as one
does.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

instead of backpacking across europe
like a normal college student. kent, went
to the arctic.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

There he stumbled upon a spaceship,
I know this sounds made up as hell,
but this is from an articile Lois Lane made
that got taken down by the gov.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

here's a pic but with redacted shit, cause if i
postedthe whole thing they'd probably snipe
me and i'm waiting for area 51 to die sooo....

 (see attached) 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

Basically upon going into the space ship,
it triggered an automated system that fucked
with his genetics. actived some type of
meta-gene and became a fucking superhero.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

basically what i'm saying is,
Superman is just some guy with the
midwest that has an actual comic book
origin.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

Superman didn't really become active
until after Kent's excursion, and there
were reports of a man fitting Kent's
description sans cape and tights

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

also since i have dated his brother(?)
son(?) idk they're very unclear of their
relationship, anyway, i've seen pictures
of him w/o the glasses and he looks
a lot like superman

(see attached)

 

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

i've also seen baby pictures of him from the
80s so more proof on the not an alien part
unless his planet dropped him off here when
he was like a newborn.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

and just think about the fact,,
that only he & his wife,, have
actual interviews w/ superman.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

basically, superman is a normal dude
from the midwest who happened upon
a thing that changed his genetic make-up

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

and instead of becoming a villain
(i'm looking at you, gotham rouges)
he became the hero.

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

but lmaooo yea, superboy is
a clone, y'all are right about that.
he's half superman / half lex luthor

(see attached)

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass
responding to @nighwtingsass

anyway,, if any radioactive spiders
wanna bite me, or any doctors wanna
try experimental medicine on me to
give me superhuman abilities i'm game.

12:21 AM • June 15, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy retweeted

maru @redarrowss

all i'm taking from this
is the fact that tim drake fucked
superman's brother. legends only.

12:31 AM • June 15, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone

 

twinkothy @nightwingsass

Can't believe I get to be non-problematic
Shane Dawson. link in my bio."@nghtwing:
remember when tim tweeted that he wouldn't
make a youtube channel bc he didn't want to
be attached to this account. well secrets out
now, start the channel coward." 

3:19 AM • June 15, 2019 • Twitter for iPhone