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Let’s go to Jake’s party, he said, it’ll be fun, he said. And then, only ten minutes after getting there, red cups in their hands, Jeremy had abandoned him to offer one to Christine.

Squip should’ve known better, really. Jeremy didn’t even particularly like house parties (the fact that the first time he’d gone to one had been filled with traumatizing experiences might’ve had something to do with it), it was odd that he’d been so insistent. But maybe it would be fun, if Jeremy wanted his company that much. However, watching Jeremy get cozy with Christine in the couch, looking at her with adoring eyes as she animatedly chats about something, kissing once in a while, is definitely not being fun.

At some point Jeremy seems to remember he exists and signals him to come over, a gesture Squip promptly pretends he didn’t see. There’s an array of human emotions that he seems to be getting the hang of very easily, and he hates most of them. Leaning against the wall, Squip quietly sips his drink, eyes flickering to where Jeremy is every once in a while, until a loud group of people blocks his field of vision. It’s probably for the best.

It also means he doesn’t notice Jeremy getting up and walking over until he’s standing right in front of him.

“What do you want?”

“Hm. You c-can join us if you want?” Jeremy says, not put back by his ex-supercomputer’s brusque manners. “We’re just talking, we’re not, like, doing anything.”

“Why? Do you need assistance talking to your girlfriend? Or is the ‘doing anything’ part that seems to be the problem?”

“No…” Jeremy frowns. “I don’t need ‘assistance’, but you’re just kind of standing here alone and-“

“Exactly, you don’t need me.” Squip says bitterly and takes another sip from his drink. “And I don’t need your company either, I like observing people. Just move along.”

Jeremy looks hurt for a second, which makes Squip almost regret it, but then his features change into something more concerned and while it’s slightly touching, it’s mostly annoying, especially when he starts speaking again. “Maybe you shouldn’t be drinking… Alcohol isn’t good for… SQUIPs” he adds the last word in a whisper, looking around to make sure no one’s listening, as if anyone would care or know what he was on about. Jeremy reaches for the cup but Squip moves it away from his grasp.

“I’m perfectly fine, Jeremy. Don’t make Christine wait.”


Somehow, on his quest to get as far away from the noise as he can, Squip ends up outside, sitting on the grass, leaning against the garden shed wall, alone with Chloe Valentine.

He’d rather sulk by himself, but Chloe’s just checking her phone, the light from the screen illuminating her face, and she looks just as uninterested in her surroundings as he is. He figures maybe she won’t bother him. A loud splash comes from the direction of the pool and then laugher mixed with sounds of disgust. He sighs, with absolutely no desire to know what happened. He should’ve stayed with Jeremy, accepted his pity invitation. If he had, he could just cling to him, none of the drunk people around them would care, and he’d be able to pretend he was back inside his head. Everything was easier then. But he can’t go back now, neither to Jeremy’s mind nor the couch, he’s probably not even there anymore. They're probably together, having fun somewhere else. Maybe in private. Maybe that's why Jeremy was looking forward to this party, a chance to be alone with Christine without worrying about parents...

“Do you have a lighter?” Chloe suddenly asks, moving closer to him.


He doesn’t bother looking at her. She doesn’t move back to her previous spot but she doesn’t speak anymore either. He considers walking away, but he got here first, so he just picks up the same drink he’s been carrying all night and takes a large sip. The fizziness surprises him, he’d expected it to have gone stale by now, but whatever. It makes his skin feel warm and tingly, which is nice, but also a little strange. Squip sighs and closes his eyes for a moment.

When he opens them, he’s awfully aware of how close Chloe is, of their knees almost touching, of her arm casually brushing his. “Do you,” he starts, but his voice sounds off and he clears his throat. “Ahem, do you need anything else?”

She brings her hand to his jaw and, before he can ask what she thinks she’s doing, Chloe’s suddenly kissing him, biting his lip. He opens his mouth to complain, but she uses the opportunity to let her tongue in, moves her hand across his chest, and Squip melts into it, whatever he was going to say replaced by a moan. He pushes her away then, blood rushing to his face and to his groin.

That was not a normal reaction.

“Wow, it actually works, huh?” Chloe says, and she bites her lip a little, a curious expression on her face.

“What does?”

“The White Out. Rich told me about it but I wasn’t sure it’d do anything, you being human now and all.”

Squip looks at her, confused for a few seconds until realization hits him. “I wasn’t aware you needed to spike people’s drinks to get their attention, Valentine.”

“Oh, please! I can get anyone I want. But this party’s being so boring, don’t you think? Entertain me a little.”

“You’re a bitch.” But neither the insult nor the glare on his face seem to cause her any trouble. In fact, she only looks more amused.

“Yeah? What’re you gonna do about it? Run to Jeremy?”

Squip just turns his face away from the offending question. He’d like nothing more than to do just that, but he can’t, Jeremy doesn’t want him. It’s time to leave this conversation, so he gets up but she quickly follows, backing him up against the wall.

“Ohhh, did I hit a spot?” She says, placing her hand on his hip, looking up with a predatory smile on her lips and twinkle in her eyes. “Why don’t you have some fun with me instead?”

He’s about to push Chloe away for the second time, when she puts her leg between his, rubbing her body against him, and he can’t contain a whine. Her voice is a low purr when she speaks, “Come on. I think I know what kind of fun you’d like.” This is probably, surely, a bad idea, but he’s tipsy and needy and sad, and locking himself in a bathroom to try to deal with it alone seems an even sadder option. Or, even worse, having Jeremy find him and ask what’s wrong. That would be simply humiliating. So.

Why not.

She takes his hand to lead him back into the house and he downs the remaining contents of his cup, proportions of alcohol and Mountain Dew unknown, none of which he should’ve had, much less mixed. But two negatives make a positive, right? Sounds just like the kind of fallacy Jeremy would justify his actions with, which must mean he’s doing great at being human.


Chloe locks the door behind them and wastes no time in getting rid of his leather jacket and pushing him into Jake’s bed.

It makes Squip feel dizzy, but she doesn’t give him much time to consider it, as she gets on top of him and kisses him rough, hand digging into his hair, pulling a little. She tastes of vodka and citrus, and he moans into her lips, kissing back hungrily as she rolls her hips against him. She raises his shirt, not completely taking it off, and presses her hand down on his stomach, feeling him up, licks a trail up his abdomen. Every touch feels like it’s been amplified, his skin is too sensitive, and he gasps softly when her tongue goes over his nipple. She plays with it until it’s hard, and then sucks on it, making it darker, teasing the other one at the same time. When she pinches it, he makes a noise he didn’t even know he was capable of.

She straightens her back for a moment, takes off her top, throwing it to the floor, as he watches through half lidded eyes, breathing quick through parted lips. Chloe looks down to admire her work, her fingers brushing through his already disheveled hair. “You look so much better like this than when you’re all broody and shit.” She presses herself against him once more, the texture of her lacy bra tickling his skin. He can hear the smile in her voice more than he can see it. “Maybe Jeremy would want you if he saw you in this state. Should I send him a picture?”

“Fuck off, Chloe,” he says, but his voice is a little breathless and she giggles in his ear.

“That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

She kisses him again and unexpectedly gets up, leaving him alone in the bed, and starts rummaging through Jake’s closet.

“What are you looking for?” Squip asks impatiently. She spiked his drink because she was bored, the least she can do now is actually get him off.

“You’ll see. Get yourself ready meanwhile.”

Assuming she’s talking about his clothes, he unceremoniously removes them, and they join her top on the floor. Chloe soon joins him, now naked, and he widens his eyes at the objects she’s brought.

“Surprised Jake also likes taking it up the ass?”

Chloe adjusts the straps around her waist and thighs, puts a condom over the dildo and lubes it up, as Squip watches in mid fascination. Then she puts her hands on his knees and tells him to lie down and spread his legs. He obeys but squirms under her when he feels the cold tip of the strap-on touching his skin.

“You can’t just shove that in.”

“Relax, I know what I’m doing.” Her fingers tease at his entrance, cold and slippery with lube, and he shudders, letting out a needy sound which makes her smile. “Unlike you.”

Thankfully she doesn’t care to specify what it is exactly that Squip doesn’t know and adds more lube before slipping in a finger, making him gasp. It’s not a completely foreign feeling, he’s touched himself before (something he could never admit to Jeremy, not after all those months of telling him masturbation was not allowed), and he tries to relax his body as she adds a second finger. He moans as she curls her fingers upwards, pressing against him just right. She does it a few more times, but when he reaches down to stroke his erection she immediately removes them.

“No touching.” Chloe says, shoving his hand away, and he throws her an offended look, which would’ve been more effective if he wasn’t looking so desperate already and his voice didn’t sound so much like a whine.

“You don’t get to give me orders.”

“But I do, Squippy,” she says in an annoyingly chirpy tone. “Do you wanna get fucked or not?”

Squippy? He stares at her in disbelief and then realizes she’s actually waiting for an answer. “I do.”

“You do what?”

“I want you to fuck me. Just do it.” But she’s still waiting, hand lightly fondling his thigh, teasing, and he groans as he lets his head fall back to Jake’s pillow. He doesn’t want to see the satisfied look in her face, even if he’s sure to hear it in her voice. “…Please.”

“That’s better.”

She moves her fingers back inside him, adding a generous quantity of lube, and then leans down to kiss his throat. The kiss quickly turns into a harsh bite, and when she sucks on it he moans, hoping it doesn’t leave a mark, but moving his head to the side to give her better access all the same. He moves against her, sighing softly, and he absentmindedly thinks of the Halloween party where he wanted Jeremy to get drunk and lose his virginity to Chloe in Jake’s house, compares it to his current situation. He’s too on edge to feel embarrassed about it but he can still appreciate the irony. It’s an outcome he could have never predicted.

At least she’s not wearing a sexy baby costume this time.

“Turn around.” Chloe says, lightly slapping his thigh once she’s done stretching him open, and Squip does, positioning himself on his hands and knees, not without throwing her a glare first.

He hopes she knows he’s doing this because he wants to, not because she’s telling him, and it suits him fine, because this way he can pretend it’s Jeremy behind him and he doesn’t even care how pathetic that sounds right now, he can just blame it on the Mountain Dew. Chloe spreads his legs further apart, grabs his hips and enters him. Squip shudders at the sensation. Chloe moves her hands across his stomach and his sides, almost soothingly, and he sighs, relaxes into it as she slowly starts thrusting. They move their hips together, and Squip touches himself, his skin is hot, he wants to be touched all over.

She lightly runs her nails across his back, “Do it harder”, he says. Chloe complies, scratching down from his shoulder to his lower back and then up again, and he arches his spine and hums in pleasure. He wonders what it would be like if it really was Jeremy… He knows every inch of Jeremy’s body, knows how it feels from the inside, what would he feel like from the outside? Jeremy’s hands caressing him, his bitten nails going over Squip’s back instead of Chloe’s gel ones, his chapped lips kissing his neck, Jeremy moaning, he’s so easy to provoke, Squip is sure he’d make lovely sounds in this situation too… Jeremy thrusting against him, Jeremy coming inside him, Jeremy filling him, Jeremy, all Jeremy…

“Oh my god.” Chloe suddenly says, bringing him back to reality. “Did you really just say Jeremy out loud while having sex with me?”

Did he? He didn’t even notice. “What’s it to you? It’s not even me you want to be fucking, is it?”

“What? Just shut up, will you?”

Squip smirks, feeling like it’s finally his turn to hit a soft spot. “Can’t get someone you want after all?”


“Is it Jake? Did he finally tire of getting back together? Or perhaps Brooke? That would explain a lot of your—” past actions he means to say, but he doesn’t get to finish the sentence because Chloe unexpectedly thrusts harder and deeper than she had ever before, and Squip cries out in a mix of pleasure and pain.

She digs her nails into his hips, in a way that’s sure to leave a bruise, and fucks him roughly now, Squip has to bite the pillow beneath him to muffle his moans. He strokes himself faster too, the heat he’s been feeling all over concentrating in one place, and it doesn’t take long for him to come all over his hand and Jake’s bedding.

Chloe pulls off and he just lets himself fall on the mattress. He closes his eyes, concentrating on his breathing and his heartbeat, the adrenaline dissipating, enjoying how his body feels. He barely registers the sounds of Chloe unclasping the harness, her light moans as she finishes on her own.

She doesn’t need his time to recover and so she quickly gets dressed, puts everything back in its place, and then picks up his clothes from the floor to throw them at him. He frowns but starts getting dressed again, silently appreciative she did not let him fall asleep.

He’s already putting on his jacket when he notices the remains of his seed still in Jake’s bedding. Chloe’s eyes follow his gaze and she smiles.

“Shouldn’t we clean that?” he asks.

“Nah, just leave it.”

Squip considers it. In theory, he knows it’s inappropriate and that he should feel bad for Jake, but he’s neither in the right mindset for it nor is empathy a human trait he feels any connection to. He fixes his hair and follows her out, the sounds of the crowd and music clearly louder in an instant.

“You’re a real piece of work, aren’t you?”

“I try my best.”