Chapter 15-Two Face
I am about six months pregnant by now and I haven't been out of the house since I found out I was having a baby. Marcus for some reason wanted to keep me here until HE was ready to tell everyone the news. He acted like it was such awful news and he doesn't want people to look at him differently. I am not sure where he got this idea in his head that having a baby was the equivalent of getting caught looking at yourself in the mirror but I don't want to upset him and have him hurt my one chance at salvation. This baby could change him. Maybe he will get out of this monstrous phase and become a loving husband and father. Maybe he will realize the error of his ways and become the gentle and kind Marcus I fell in love with. But I know those dreams are just dreams. Nothing can bring back the old Marcus.
While looking out the window in my bare room, I hear the door slam and his familiar voice
I call back quickly because I know he get pissed when I don't answer
His feet come up the stairs and he walks into our bedroom. He regards me before saying, "Get dressed. We are going to my election meeting."
And the truth comes out. He wanted to hide me from everyone so he could use his pregnant wife for leverage. People love it when their leaders seem human and look like loving fathers and an almost new father. And even people who don't care for him can't deny him their vote out of selflessness to the baby and me. If Marcus lost the election because of their denial that would be selfish because they are putting Marcus out of a job and he can't provide for his family.
An hour later smiling faces and people constantly asking to touch my swollen belly surround me. And of course I can't say no. I have to play my part if I don't want Marcus to beat me later and I literally just got over his beating from last week when I wasn't listening to him because I had to go barf due to my nausea. So I would prefer if I didn't get a huge welt on my face tonight.
Marcus is playing his role well. He is talking with everyone and shaking hands with complete strangers. From time to time he will come up and ask me how I am feeling like he is a concerned husband that he will never be. This whole meeting is painful because it shows me how Marcus could be at home but he chooses not to. He choses to be the monster that tortures his wife and unborn child. If I think of it too much my nausea kicks back in and I can't throw up here.
In the end Marcus wins by a landslide. The celebration (if you can call it that) is basically him talking about his huge thanks to everyone and his plans for the community before everyone says goodbye to each other and leaves. Once we get home, we silently go upstairs to get ready for bed. I change and get into bed and soon enough Marcus follows me and curls up against my backside that faces away from him. He leans into my ear and whispers
I am so shocked by the slightest kindness towards me that before I can even react he has turned away and fallen asleep. And the little burst of the old Marcus is gone and I am alone in my thoughts once more.