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book one - frerard

Chapter Text


"Remember, you are going to be completely independent when you are not participating in the activities the school organized. Do not bother the teachers unless you broke your foot or have a serious medical emergency. You have to decide with your tent partner what to bring. Remember to pack food for both of you that will last you the whole trip. We'll be leaving tomorrow at 9:00 sharp so you must arrive at the school at 8:00 since there are always delays. See you all tomorrow morning, class you are dismissed"

"Finally" I exhaled and turned to Frank, who looked absolutely and completely bored but his expression quickly changed to a more troubled one.

"I can't really wait until tomorrow, I'm in hot water for accidentally setting my kitchen on fire, it was just a bit by the way, but my mom wants to kill me" he said glumly, standing up and leaving the classroom with me.

"Ok, so, how about you go over to my house and sleep over tonight and you go really early to get your stuff without your mom noticing"

"Huh," he said, deep in thought. Someone accidentally bumped into him on the street and he didn't say anything which is quite the opposite of what usually happens (it usually involves him getting angry and mentioning his height) which could only mean that Frank was probably forming a plan in his head. "that could work, but I'd have to sneak in at about 5 am to make sure that she's really asleep. She loves staying up late watching Spanish telenovelas"

"I guess we'd just have to stay up really late then"

He groaned.

"Come on. I'm doing this for you and it'll be fun! We can stay up watching movies and playing video games. We can do tons of fun stuff"

"Ok, ok, I'm going, geesus christ! You don't have to convince me, you are literally preventing me from getting killed by a middle aged woman"

"You're a whiny bitch, you know that?"

"Ok, maybe I am, but do you know what you are?"

"What am I?" I said, skeptically.

"Never mind, I'll tell you later, we have reached your house" he said while dramatically pointing to it.

"And why would you wait"

"To make it more dramatic?"

"I don't really believe that's the reason"

"Well, I can't explain it in words"

I opened the door to my house and walked over to the kitchen with Frank, finding Mikey and Pete there, disastrously trying to make cookies.

"You're supposed to add sugar, not cinnamon you idiot" Mikey was telling Pete, who had probably ruined the cookies three times already, just because that's how he is.

"Well, in my defense, it looks the same!"

"It does not look the same and you know it!"

"Hi, Mikes," I said, making myself some coffee. I sighed and continued, "Hi, Pete"

"I love you too, Gerard" Pete said jokingly.

I don't hate Pete but he's annoying. Very annoying. He is gay as fuck, just like Mikey and I do not want them to date. Ever. Pete has been here all fucking week and it is ridiculous. It makes it more probable that they end up dating because everyone has to like Mikey because he's awesome. Just like Frank. But that's not the point. The point is that if crazy = genius, Pete = annoying.

When my coffee was ready, I put some in a mug for me and got a muffin for Frank.

"Why didn't you get me coffee?" he whined like the whiny bitch I said he was.

"First of all you don't even like it! You always complain that it's disgusting and you don't need something to make you even more hyper than you already are when you eat anything sugary. I was just being nice"

"Oh, you know that you're not trying to be nice, you're just lazy, and I could always develop a taste for it! You have an addiction to it so it's not like it makes you hyper, you are the laziest person I have ever met"

"I am nice! I also do not have an addiction!"

"Come on, you wouldn't survive a day without it - oh god, you're gonna die at camp"

"I'll find a way to have some"

"Sweet Geesus"

We settled down in the living room, not really ready to spend over 12 hours on that couch. We played video games for a while and I was really good at winning. Yeah, totally.

"COME ON GERARD STOP GETTING US KILLED" Frank yelled as I got killed for the tenth time in less than half an hour.

We changed the game after that and played Mario Kart where I could have totally beat Frank's ass but somehow he won nearly every single time.

"Come on! I can't beat you every time! Then you'll have to bow down to the king of the rainbow road, me!" he said as he got first place by a lot.

Just then, Mikey probably decided that Pete was so bad at cooking they should just stop trying [I could sense a burning smell coming from the kitchen] so they appeared right next to Frank and scared the living shit out of me. Damn teenagers.

Both of them sat on the couch incredibly close to each other. Great. I just wanted Pete to get the fuck away from my brother and there he is, getting as close as he possibly can.

"Can I play?" Mikey asked, completely ignoring Pete who was practically in his lap.

I gave him my controller so he could play against Frank.

Mikey won. By a lot.

"Dude, you are terrible at this game" he told Frank, giving the controller to Pete.

"No I'm not! I beat Gerard lots of times!" Frank argued

"Wait, you beat Gerard? But you're terrible and I've never beat him. You know I'm good" Mikey said surprised. I didn't say anything and it dawned upon Frank.

"You let me win!" he said pointing a finger at me.


"Yes you did!"

He then attacked me with a pillow and threw himself on top of me. We fell to the floor and suddenly our faces were inches apart, both blushing furiously.

"Come on, get a room!" Pete said while we groaned.

"It wasn't weird until you said that, thanks, Pete" I said while getting off of Frank and sitting back on the couch, still red-faced.

"You're welcome"

"Shut up!"

Chapter Text


After eating pizza and watching Home Alone [just because the stupid movie had gotten in our heads thanks to Jack who had a weird obsession and would not shut up about it that day at school] we ended making friendship bracelets for some weird reason like we were nine-year-olds at summer camp.

"I'm making yours with blue and black and maybe green because you love those colours" Gerard said, picking out the threads. "well, I'm making yours with blue and green" I told him very seriously.

"Green is not a creative colour" he said, giggling as he saw my face.

"No. Do not mention that. Ever. After watching that video I couldn't sleep for a week you evil prat" I said thinking of that time last year when Gerard had shown me "Don't Hug Me I'm Scared". I had been 15 but it still had scared the shit out of me.

He just chuckled and said "Let's get creative" so I chucked a pillow at him which ended up in a pillow fight in which I, not very gracefully, lost.

Gerard had only managed to win because I'm short which is totally unfair. And maybe the fact that I, accidentally and very clumsily, fell off the couch, nearly breaking the coffee table and my arm in the process, may have boosted his chances of beating me. But that's highly unlikely, since someone above [is there even someone above? Cause if there is, they're mean] didn't love me and made me short. Which is why I sometimes lose. Totally not because I'm the clumsiest person alive.

We resumed our painstaking task of trying to make these bracelets with the threads of hell. I had decided to call them that because they would get tangled up every five seconds. After trying twenty times I finally managed to produce something that sort of resembled a friendship bracelet but it was definitely not it. At least it had blue in it but I had ditched the green after Gerard had decided to mention that awful video. Instead I had done it with black, blue and red, because I know he loves those colours and it would match the one he was making for me that had green and black in it because he knows I love those colours.

I announced that I had finished and Gerard said that he had as well, showing me his. It was beautiful and nearly perfect so I put it on as he got mine on his wrist.

"Now we'll be best friends forever"

"Yeah, I guess. But there has to be a rule"

"What rule" he said skeptically.

"Absolutely no Don't Hug Me I'm Scared references"

"I can't promise anything"

I threw a pillow at him.

"Fine, fine, no more getting creative"

I threw another pillow at him.

"Ok, ok, I love you" he said, completely platonically.

"I love you too" I said, completely platonically as well.

We ate candy that got me hyper as fuck because I'm small and I have ADHD and sugar affects me just like coffee would so when we were singing along to Single Ladies while trying [and failing] to do the dance on the couch, it was kind of normal for me, seeing in the state I was.


I woke up with my head on Gerard's stomach.


The movie was still playing which meant that I hadn't been asleep for long, thank our punk rock god, Billie Joe Armstrong.

I had probably woken up when the Death Star exploded. It was nearly five am so I probably had to wake Gerard up.

But I didn't want to.

But I had to even though he looked beautiful.

What am I even thinking?

I tried waking him up but I didn't work so I just pushed him off the couch.

"What was that for!" he exclaimed after chucking a pillow at me.

"It's nearly five, we should go get my stuff"

"Oh yeah"

Gerard was so sleepy he appeared drunk since he stumbled ten times on the way to his car. Then he nearly crashed into about seven trees on the way to my house like the good driver he is.

When we finally arrived I had to climb a tree to reach my window since my room was on the second floor. After I got into my room I went downstairs and filled a bag with crisps, Doritos, a couple cans of coke, cookies and every other type of junk food I could find in my kitchen.

Suddenly I heard a loud beep coming from a car horn and someone saying "shit!"

Fucking hell, my mom will wake up.

I ran upstairs to my room and quickly grabbed a bag I had and started putting random things in it like my sleeping bag, my phone charger, a pillow and practically everything I had on my night table out of panic and then threw the bag out my window like it was a bomb. I found my guitar and climbed out of my room with it strapped to my back. I ran to Gerard's car after picking up the bag from the grass and after shutting the door I made motions for him to drive but he was sleepy as fuck and didn't respond.

"Gerard! Gerard, drive! Come on, drive! Drive, you lazy lump of fuck!"

I clapped a couple times to get his attention and it worked.

He snapped back to reality (oh, there goes gravity) and slammed his foot on the speed pedal. Gerard finally began driving like a normal person I decided to ask a question.

"What was that noise"

"What noise?"

"Oh you know, the car horn that woke up the whole neighbourhood including my mother!"

"Oh that noise. I accidentally fell asleep. And got stuck in between the seat and door and while trying to get back to how I was I accidentally elbowed the horn. Oops."

"Oh my fucking god, Gerard"

"What, it's five am and I'm tired! Don't blame me, you set your kitchen on fire!"

"And we're back to that tiny detail"


When we arrived at his house we passed out on the couch immediately, wishing we could sleep for days instead of less than an hour since we had to wake up at six thirty and it was already a quarter to six. Great, just great.

Chapter Text



Ah, don't you love waking up to your brother throwing a wet sponge on your face?


"Thanks, Mikey, now I'm drenched" I spoke even though I could barely move my mouth providing that I had woken up just a few moments ago.


"You're welcome, now you're not gonna be late"


"But I didn't even sleep for an hour"


"Not my problem"


"Ugh" I groaned, sitting up. I felt like I had a hangover even though I didn't drink anything last night.


I dragged my body to the kitchen to make myself some coffee so I could wake up at least a bit.


My car already had my bags so I woke up Frank. We had to buy food so he just grabbed a muffin out of my kitchen and got into my car.


At Walmart, we bought macaroni, soup, rice, sausages, spaghetti, noodles [basically every type of pasta you could ever imagine] and a lot of ice cream because we had a cooler. We also had tons of chocolate and Frank even bought a jar of Nutella. And cheez whiz. 

In case Brendon kicks Ryan out of his tent and goes to stay with us for a while. That boy has an addiction.


The school bus was packed but I managed to get us a spot behind Hayley and Ray which was cool but Alex and Jack were behind us. That's simply just so fucking great. I have never met anyone in my life with so much energy like those two besides Frank. They were an unstoppable force of chaos.


Frank fell asleep almost immediately and, thank god, Jack and Alex did too. I managed to get an hour of quiet until Alex, having just woken up, thought it would be a good idea to wake up Jack because he had to say that he "drools in his sleep"


Since those two were awake, there was no way anyone was going to be able to sleep. 


It started out okay because they were playing games like hangman but they got louder and louder and ended up bickering like an old married couple. 


Why, just why.


Half an hour later it seems like the torture will never end because the two of them are now fighting over the fact that they don't know if it's spelt "grey" or "gray". 


I politely told them that "gray" was the American way and that Alex used "grey" because he had lived in England before so they could both shut the fuck up. Although that ended that argument, they were both bickering after only three minutes of peace and quiet.


Frank was still sleeping, curled up in his seat right next to me and started snoring really quietly which was absolutely adorable. For someone who usually looks so fierce, it was strange to see him this way.


The younger boy turned around in his sleep and leaned his head against my shoulder. Fuck. I'm not good at this, I don't touch people and they don't touch me. I was as stiff as a board but I relaxed after a while, since, after all, it was just Frank.


Alex and Jack probably fell asleep after a while because there was finally silence in our section of the bus which made it quite peaceful and comfortable. I was bored out of my mind and couldn't sleep (I think I maybe had too much coffee. Nah, that's impossible) so I decided to take my notebook out and practice drawing real people.


I scanned the bus, looking for something worthwhile to sketch. I saw a red-head and a boy with a fro in front of me, lost in their own little worlds, doing what they like to help pass the time. Hayley was reading a book and Ray was listening to music while staring out of the window, contemplating life.


After finishing drawing Hayley, I suddenly heard movement behind me. Godfuckindammit, they were awake. I turned around, expecting a petty fight to start but was greeted with a quite different scene.


Alex was blushing, staring out the window, deliberately not looking at Jack, who was smiling down at his hand which was clasped in Alex's. Holy crap, I did not see that coming. And now it's so obvious, I mean, how they clearly care so much about each other although they're always arguing like imbeciles.


After a while they fell asleep again so I decided to sketch them. I'm not creepy, I'm just bored and think that this will be a good thing to give to them when they get together. Because they will. Because I'm obviously going to tell Frank about this and he ships them so much, he's going to make it happen. He's good at getting what he wants.


I heard a sputtering sound quite suddenly and then the bus stopped. I was pretty sure we weren't there yet. Frank was already awake when Mr. Serrano, our Spanish teacher arrived to tell us all to get off the bus.


"Mr. Serrano, what happened?" Vic yelled from his seat.


"Well, the bus has an engine problem and since it's going to take a while to fix it and we're not that far, we're going to have to walk to the camping grounds"


Jaime started cursing in Spanish.


"Jaime, I can understand you"


"Fuck" was all Jaime said because Vic had elbowed him so hard in the ribs, he couldn't speak.


After walking with the rest of the class and teachers for about half an hour, we finally arrived at the camping site. The teachers gave out the instructions and we would basically be alone for most of the time except that we would have inspections every day and sometimes we would have meals together (although we had to cook our own)


"remember kids, this is a school trip so you can still get detention, but instead of a normal detention, you get to cook for the rest of the teachers and wash their dishes afterwards"


Nobody wanted to cook for the teachers so I guess we'd have to behave. Well, that's why punishments exist. I should start thinking more.


The teachers left and we were alone again, looking for places to set up our tents. Everyone was pretty far away from each other so that we'd have some sort of privacy I guess. 


Frank is now pulling the tent out of the bag and I think it's a great moment to tell him that I have no idea on how set up one.

Chapter Text



"What do you mean, you don't know how to set up a tent," I said in disbelief.


"I just don't" Gerard shrugged. We had a small problem. We had a tent but no one knew how to set it up which was perfect.


"If you don't know how to set it up, and I don't know how to set it up, then who is going to set it up?" 


"I don't know. We can try, it can't be that hard"


Turns out it is that hard.


We gave up after half an hour and decided to look for people around the forest that can help us.


The first thing we found was a tent which wasn't really set up yet, it just had a stick inside it that held the roof up. Judging by its state and the giggling coming from inside it, it belonged to two very stupid people.


I was correct. 


They clearly heard us arrive because when I found the entrance and opened it, I found a very drunk Alex blinking at me about 2 inches away from my face and an also very drunk Jack laughing his ass off due to our situation. Just then, Gerard decided to trip and fall on top of the tent, crushing Jack beneath him and consequently, shutting him up.


"Would you like to join us?" Alex said solemnly, all of a sudden. "I mean, we're bored, you must be bored and you made a great entrance"


"Yeah - gET OFF ME GERARD - it will be fun!" Jack pushed Gerard onto the grass before he could even try to get up.


"Fine. But only for a while" I looked at Gerard and he looked at me with a please-don't-do-this-to-me look and I shot him a come-on-they-are-our-friends-and-you-won't-die look so he finally caved in and started to crawl into the tent.


"Ok, so let's play truth or dare. Cause we're drunk. And it's a stupidly fun game" Jack said the moment I managed to get in.


"We're not drunk," I said.


"Well, get drunk"


"We will not get drunk"


"Pleaseeeeeeeeee" Alex drunkenly begged.


Maybe I got a bit tipsy. But it's Jack's fault. He dared me to drink all that beer. I don't even like beer.


"Ok, ok, Alex, truth or dare"


"hm, I'm too lazy to do a dare so truth"


"Uhhh, how old were you when you got your first kiss"


He shook his head at me. "I haven't. Ever. Is it hard to believe because I'm so pretty?"


"You wish"


"It's my turn now. Gerard, truth or dare"


"Truth," he said, not even bothering to consider dare.


"What's the meanest thing you did as a kid?"


"Well, in kindergarten I once bit a boy's hand when he had stolen my chair. Because it was my chair. No one gets to steal my chair"


"Huh, I once got bitten on the hand for sitting on a chair in kindergarten" Gerard looked at me with an expression I'll never forget. "I'm just kidding"


He exhaled. "Oh thank god. I think the kid moved to Australia or something so I'll never have to see him again. Now Jack, truth or dare"




"I dare you to tickle Alex until he squeals" 


Jack approached him while doing a weird thing with his fingers and Alex inched further and further away from him until he bumped into me. The second Jack started tickling him, Alex squealed and his arms were flailing around him, trying to stop Jack.


"He's very ticklish, I'm telling you guys," Jack told us. "Anyways since it's my turn now, Frank, truth or dare"




Jack sat down and didn't say anything for over a minute, trying to think of something to ask me. He suddenly sat up straight (is there anything straight about him though?) and said: "what do you like about your crush?"


I groaned. Why did he have to do this to me? He suspects that I like Gerard and Gerard is right in front of me, oblivious to what's happening.


Also, do I even like Gerard? It's not like I take as much glances at him as I can when he's not looking. It's not like I always put his needs before mine. It's not like I need to be around him most of the time. It's not like I feel sort of empty when he's gone. Or maybe it is like that.


Maybe Jack isn't right but I'm not either. Maybe it's more than a crush.


"I like the way that I always feel like I can trust them. I like how they will always support me, no matter what. I like that whenever he smiles and I need to smile because it's so contagious"


"Wait, he?" Jack asked.


"Oh, haven't you heard the news?" I said, while resting my head on Gerard's lap and propping up my feet on Alex's, "I'm not straight"


I popped my gum.


A million expressions crossed their faces in less than a second. In the end, Alex had an I-already-knew-this-but-should-I-act-surprised look on his face, Jack was dumbfounded and Gerard's expression was so complex, I didn't know what it meant, yet I think he was surprised because of my sudden coming out.


"Come on, isn't anyone going to say anything? It's not like it was so hard to guess I swear-" I was speaking and then Jack spoke up.


"If you're not straight than what exactly are you?"


"Asexual. And biromantic. I think. But I mainly like guys"


"I'm asexual too!" I suddenly heard a voice say from outside. I stuck my head out of the tent and there was a redhead standing right outside it. Hayley came in and made herself comfortable, well, as comfortable as you can get sitting on the hard ground. "I'm aroace actually but you knew that cause I've said it quite a few times already. Also, hi, I'm here because my tent is already set up. I get to share one with Lindsey and Jamia and they were talking and I was bored so I came over here. Pete and Mikey are probably going to be here soon since they went looking for you Gerard. So, who's the ace here?"


"Me" I said and she high-fived me. I already knew about her so that's basically why I came out. It feels good not to he the only one, though I do suspect that most of my friends are not straight at all. I mean, look at Jack, could he be any gayer?


The truth or dare game began again, this time with Hayley and I was so distracted by it that I didn't really think about how my coming out would impact the others.














ok, so, fun fact, Frank in this fic is mostly inspired by myself actually (I actually use him and this story as a way to write my feelings out I guess, you'll see later on, my influence becomes much more potent) and the other characters are inspired by my friends. This chapter is basically an example of a casual interaction (pun intended) between us and although frank is me and I am frank, my relationship with my crush (who's one of my closest friends) is kind of like Alex and Jack's weird competitive/sort-of-dating friendship and I love her so much ahhhhhhhhh


ok bye.


oh, and that story about Gerard biting a kid's hand over a chair in preschool actually happened to me, that kid was mean and stole my chair so...

Chapter Text



We played for a while, Mikey and Pete arrived, the tent fell down a couple times since it wasn't really set up and I completely ignored what had happened before.


I mean, Frank came out, we were surprised, we accepted him (why wouldn't we in the first place?) and I didn't think once about myself and how I should do the same. Yeah. 


I was starting to get lost in my own thoughts as usual when Frank started snapping his fingers in front of my face. I quickly came back to reality where Frank was asking me something.


"Gerard, come on, what's your Hogwarts house? Alex and I are Slytherins, Jack and Pete are Gryffindors, Hayley is a Hufflepuff and Mikey is a Ravenclaw"


I frowned as a realization came over me. "Jack, is that the reason you coloured your blond streak, that makes you look like a skunk by the way, red with sharpies? Because you were feeling extremely devoted to your house?" 


"No. Maybe. Yes. But in my defense, Alex was going to colour his green, we just couldn't find a marker that colour since I lost most of mine a week ago thanks to someone" he fake coughed and glared at Pete who just shrugged and smiled innocently.


"Come on, what is your house Gerard" Frank was trying to annoy me into telling him because he kept poking me in the arm so I decided to tell them, "well I think I'm a Slytherin"


Frank and Alex yelled and high-fived each other. Pete and Jack reluctantly gave them money. 


"Did you make a fucking bet on me?" 


"" Frank answered slowly.


"You did! I demand 50% of the money you won, it's only fair"


"Fine" he handed me ten bucks.


We started playing truth or dare again and it was fun until Alex was dared to a grape on a cracker dipped in mayo. He ate it and nearly puked on Jack. Classy. 


In the end, Hayley, Mikey and Pete left but Frank and I stayed because we didn't have a tent to sleep in yet. Jack and Alex were perfectly ok with us staying but they fell asleep almost immediately. After all, it was really late.




I woke up at dawn because birds are freaking loud. 


Damn those pesky birds and their noisy habits.


I just stared at the tent roof for a while until Frank asked if I was awake. I told him I was though he could see that. Frank pointed at Jack and Alex who were basically cuddling at this point and said that we should go outside. 


We got out of the tent quietly and began walking in silence until we reached this beautiful creek which was actually pretty close to where our stuff lay, forgotten after that weird night we had. 


"I thought that we should give them some privacy and though it's cold, it's worth it because it feels so beautiful and surreal" Frank said, as we sat down on the ground, closer to each other than usual. 


"Oh you bet it's cold" I rubbed my hands together, trying to get some warmth. It didn't work and Frank noticed that.


He took my hands in his skeleton-gloved ones and I felt a jolt of electricity run through them. I looked at him and he smiled awkwardly, but as pretty as always. 


"Thanks for the gloves by the way," he started saying, ignoring our hands wrapped around each other,"I think they are one of my favourite birthday presents, even though they were simple, I really love them"


"You really do"


If I said that I didn't like him, I would be lying. If I said that this was completely platonic to me, I would be lying. If I said that I did not fall asleep after I rested my head on his shoulders, I would be lying.


I'm sorry but here's a list why I fell asleep (because I'm an obstinate fuck and I want to prove why what I did was valid though I don't have to prove it to anyone)


1. gee be sleepy

2. fronk be comfy

3. there was silence??? at last???

4. did I mention fronk be comfy???



Yeah, ok. Fuck you. You're not a judge. Don't judge me.


I can say that when I woke up, I was bright red because Frank has started stroking my hair. How was this supposed to be platonic when he did things like that? I'm sorry, but, this is pretty hard, trying not to have a huge crush on the boy that could not be any closer to me?


It's all pLaToNiC. 




I don't really like him that much, I mean, I don't start staring at him when he turns away. I don't think about anything we could be in the future. I don't spend hours remembering his touch on my hand when he brushed against mine, or the smooth tips of our fingers accidentally bumping against each other. Yeah.


I've got the hang of this 'impossible crush' thing, totally.


I opened my eyes to see his hazel ones looking back at me. He looked so innocent, just sitting there, observing the mess that I am.


Why would he though, why me? 


I bet he's comparing me to his crush, who he rather wishes to be with at the moment. He should be with him now, not me, having this completely romantic moment that it would be, if I wasn't me, and if I would disappear. 


I wonder, would anyone really notice? If I'd disappear? I always feel like I'm outside of things, never a real part of anything. Yeah, I have friends but, I'm not their only one. They have friends too and they wouldn't miss me. Would they? 


What about Frank? I consider him as someone really special to me, yet I don't think I'm that special to him. Just another friend he gets to see everyday and is there just because we're living.


I shook those feelings away. I should be focusing on the present, on Frank, who was incredibly close to me at the moment, his face, inches away from mine. Yet his eyes were elsewhere, for he was contemplating our surroundings, everything we could see, and maybe, even me.


Our eyes were fixed on the other and I saw a quick look flash through his eyes. I know that look. It's how I look at him. Does he really think of me, the same way I think of him?

Chapter Text



We stayed there until pretty late. Gerard was sleeping on me so there wasn't much I can do. Except stare at him while he sleeps. Wow I sound like a psychopath.


The thing is I finally had to get up because eating is a necessity and I was hungry as fuck. Who thought that not eating in a bit less than a day made you hungry?


I really didn't want to wake him up, but, what else can I do?


After unsuccessfully trying to get up without waking Gerard up, he was rubbing his eyes, still sleepy as fuck. I told him that we should go back to our tent and cook something. He agreed so we went back.


Of course, us being the smart boys that we are, we got lost and ended up at Ray and Mikey's tent (Gerard says that thank god Pete didn't share that tent with Mikey, he shared it with some guy named Joe who seems cool) and they fed us. Like, they had actual food. Not that type of junk food that we had brought. So we had this weird brunch that consisted of scrambled eggs on toast (made over this tiny stove that they had brought) with tomato and juice in exchange that we wash their dishes and pans. 


Of course, there were bathrooms here but there were no fucking places to wash dishes. Makes so much sense. So we headed down to the creek so we could clean Mikey and Ray's stuff.


When we got there we found Jack and Alex just fooling around, splashing in the water in their swimsuits because despite the fact that I was dressed entirely in black (yeah, goth, I know) it was getting warm enough to go swim.


Gerard began washing the dishes and cutlery almost immediately while I began jumping from the edge of the creek to the rocks in the middle of it, like stepping stones until I reached Alex, grabbing his shoulders and scaring the shit out of him. Jack laughed so hard that he slipped and fell on his butt, splashing water everywhere and making me laugh even harder. 


Alex turned around and just splashed me in the face! Rude! So I started jumping from stepping stone to stepping stone, trying to get away from the boy who was trying kill me. Of course, as if it was in slow motion, I slipped and fell into creek. Jack thankfully cushioned the fall (everyone has a knack for falling on top of him, poor boy) but I was drenched. The damage had been done and I was wet from head to toe.


I walked back to Gerard who took one look at me and just groaned.


"Frank! How!" 


"I just fell in the river. It's Alex's fault"


"Yeah, Alex's. You should go change, you can't stay with your wet clothes on"


I didn't respond to that.




"I may have forgotten to bring any clothes?"


"Goddammit, you are so stupid. I'll lend you some of mine. Stay here in the sunlight or just swim since you're already wet and I'll get you a towel and clothes"


I nodded gratefully and he made his way to where we suspected our tent was (it had been nearly a day and we still couldn't find it). I made up my mind and started washing the dishes Gerard had left here.


When he came back I may have looked guilty as hell of murder because I had hands covered in blood and Alex and I were also grabbing a struggling Jack by his arms and feet.


"Ok, Gerard, I know what it looks like but I am completely innocent" I said, and let go of Jack's legs which made him fall on his butt again. 


"I literally caught you red-handed. You have actual blood on your hands"


"Well, yes, but, it's my blood. I hurt my hand on a sharp rock"


"Ok, ok, I believe you. But don't go around murdering people. That goes to Alex and Jack as well"


"Why" Alex said in the most dramatic way he could possibly muster without laughing and raising his arms up at the sky.


"Because it's ilegal. Oh no, I'm turning into you guys' parents. This is bad"


"Yes daddy" Jack said in his usual annoying manner that always ruins conversations so I told him to shut up. 


I got out of the river and took off my clothes that were drenched in water, then wrapped myself around the towel that Gerard had just handed to me.


After a while, I got a bit dry so I decided to put Gerard's shirt on (it was a Misfits one that I like so much, I intend to keep it) I was only in my wet underwear inside the towel so I didn't really want to take it off but I had to put the shirt on. So I did.


I ignored the fact that Gerard was probably staring at me since there wasn't anything else you could really look at. I am not vain, okay, I just, ugh.


I can't really explain it. Yeah, right, it's ridiculous and painful, why do I even do this type of stuff. Definitely not so Gerard sees me or anything.


We stayed there in silence for a while, me in only my underwear and Gerard's cool shirt, waiting for my boxers to dry until it got too cold and we went back to the tent, leaving Alex and Jack (who were still in the water for some weird fucking reason, like, honestly, how on earth don't they get cold) to themselves, and honestly we weren't so sure if we should do that because they'd either end up accidentally (or purposefully, I don't really know with those two) murdering each other or ending up closer than they were before. It's never really clear, they have a really weird friendship.




author's note: so, hi, I just randomly decided to make an authors note because I have absolutely no fucking clue to what I should write on the next chapter so meanwhile enjoy this weird note I just made you read. yeah, bye.


update on that: it's about a month later and yes, I've written like five more chapters in which interesting stuff happens (yay) and I'm posting this chapter now yay

Chapter Text



I should stop doing this. Thinking about him in the way I am. I should stop staring at him as if he was the freaking sun, he definitely does not need that ego boost.


And about him, coming out (yeah I'm still thinking about this, it hasn't even been a freaking day) I had no clue, I mean you couldn't really tell. And how hasn't he noticed that I am absolutely and extremely gay. I mean, you take one (1) look at me and you can tell I am a flaming homosexual so really, what the fuck, Frank.


I was snapped to my senses thanks to the boy I was thinking about, who was asking me something. I hadn't really noticed that he had been talking, I guess I had been distracted thinking. About him. 


Frank repeated what he had said and it turns out that he was cold so we got in the tent (which Mikey and Ray apparently had actually set up earlier while we were down by the creek) and I gave him some pants and a hoodie cause the idiot (I love him so much though) had only one hoodie, which had been lost under the mess I had created when I was looking through my backpack.


I made us spaghetti while he made this type of sauce which was actually pretty good though he kept getting frustrated because he wanted to get it "just right". 


We hadn't talked since the creek so after an hour and a half of silence (the times when he cursed do not count), when we finally sat down outside, ready to eat our dinner, Frank decided to talk.


"What do you think this all means. I mean, life, death, does it really matter? What is there after life? Are we really living? If we're not going to remember this life, are they actually worth living, what makes them special?"


Woah, I was not prepared for that.


"I, I don't know, Frank. I'm confused by all of this too, the "why am I here, why did this happen?" questions swim through my mind way more often than you think but, am I supposed to have an answer yet? To the meaning of life?"


We sat down in silence for a while, enjoying each other's company until he got up and said; "I need to go on a walk"


I watched him leave, to go on his own adventure of sorts and then got up to pick up the plates so I could go down to the river to wash them.


There was no one in sight near the river so I sat down and washed each dish and fork and knife and pot, very thoroughly. I had hoped to find him but I gave up after everything was clean. I made my way back to the tent but everything was so lonely so I walked to the place where everyone would get together.


I found a bulletin board that informed us that we had to participate in some activities. I bumped into Ryan who told me who was going to do this weird activity tomorrow morning. Most of our friends were going to be there so I signed us (Frank and I) up.


I went back to the tent. Frank was already there so I explained everything to him. It was dark already so we just went to bed.


I turned off my flashlight and I realized that Frank was gettin uneasy. Poor boy, I thought to myself, he's probably scared of the dark.


"Frank, are you ok?" I finally decided to ask.


"Not really, I'm really scared of the dark. Terrified, actually"


"Do you want to hold my hand?" 


I said that in a sort-of-joking way but seeing the look of terror on his face and assuming that he felt absolutely awful, I didn't say anything else, instead just took his hand in mine.


After a long time (which I spent freaking out because we were holding hands) I finally fell asleep, thinking about Frank's questions from before and trying to think up answers.









author's note: the next chapter is Frank's point of view of the events that happened in this chapter up until Gerard tells him about the activity. It basically goes back in time and the chapter that comes after that is Gerard's point of view again and it's about the activity so I guess we'll never know what frank thinks about the hand holding and all that (at least, you think you'll never know) 

I'm also really sorry that this chapter is so short, I really wanted to write the next one so I wrote most of this one (up until frank enters) a while ago but now I got a tiny bit inspired and finished the rest.


Chapter Text

tw: mentions of past self harm, but nothing else




I had to leave because I wanted to be alone. I had to get away from those questions that were tearing me apart and the boy, who was affecting me the same way the questions did.


I just walked, not really knowing the direction I'm walking in, nor the destination. Apparently the answer was, in direction of the creek because sure enough, after ten minutes of walking, my brain wallowing in self-doubt, I was standing on the creek's edge, watching the water flow by.


I sat down on the grass, in some sort of daze and pulled out my utility knife from my pocket. I have been carrying this around for a long time and thankfully, it had been stored safely in my backpack when I had fallen into the river earlier today. 


It was a simple thing really, I had bought it to cut cardboard in art class over a year ago but I had kept it for another reason. 


I used to use it to cut.


I haven't used it in quite a long time now, I guess I just pulled it out of my pocket out of habit.


I remember that I had been horribly depressed last year and I had nothing to cut with except for this and the kitchen knives. The real knives hurt much less but this was easier to carry around and my mother didn't even know I owned this. 


I used to cut to be able to escape reality, but I did it in the most inconspicuous way posible, making small, superficial cuts that healed quickly so that no one would worry (not that they noticed anyways)


The stupid knife also reminded me of that time when I wouldn't feel anything. I got so depressed, I turned numb. I didn't feel happy but I didn't feel sad either. I was just, truly and completely numb. I would then cut, just to feel. It's horrible, not feeling anything, just being there physically but not there mentally. 


I eventually stopped cutting after I met Gerard. I started feeling again and I'm grateful for that. Sure, crushes suck and you feel let down a lot but at least you feel. It was much healthier for me to hang out with him instead of lying at home doing absolutely nothing. I began to feel happier around him and I finally have friends. It's not like I don't feel this urge to cut sometimes but instead I suppress it and focus that negative energy into doing something more useful, like playing the guitar.


I felt the cool metal of the blade on my skin but I didn't press it down hard, I just wanted to feel it, making sure that this was real, trying to differentiate the real world from my mind.


I retracted the blade back into its shell and put it back into my pocket, just in time to hear someone walking down to where I was. I quickly scrambled up a tree and saw Gerard carrying all of our dinner stuff. I watched him from the tree the whole time that he was cleaning our dishes in a way that was probably really creepy, goddammit Frank.


He may have been too busy washing to notice me but I caught on plenty of little things that he did. Like when his hair would fall to his face, he would blow so it would fly away but that usually failed. Or when he would get distracted and just sit there, watching the river flow by, not caring about the soap suds in his hands.


He finally finished washing our stuff and went back to our tent. At least I guess that's where he went because I stayed in the tree.


I don't want to admit this but I fell asleep after like twenty minutes. And then I woke up when I fell out of the tree. All I can say on that matter is that dirt doesn't taste very good. And I think I might've sprained my wrist so that sucks.


Walking back to the tent, I realized that there was nobody there. I went inside and lay down on my section of it.


Gerard came back after a while. He had probably gone over to Mikey's tent, or on a wall to kill time I guess, because of course we were going to avoid the activities organized by our school, why would we ever want to submit ourselves to that sort of torture? Would you ever catch me rolling around in the dirt and mud willingly for the sake of making my team win, when usually teammates are the world's biggest assholes? Yes, actually, I sound like a hypocrite. On those occasions I would do the same as always, smile politely, cheer on my team, be as optimistic as possible and would do anything to win. Even though I find that there's nothing worse than doing that, having good surroundings is the key to success, so I can't afford to be mean to others, so I keep my feelings inside my head and keep this fake mask on because someday, hopefully, it won't be a mask, it will be my true self.


Gerard entered the tent. "Are you okay now?"


"Yeah, sure, sorry about that," I said, brushing it off lightly. I shrugged and then continued "where did you go in the meanwhile?" 


"I washed our dishes, then went to find Mikey but he was with Pete so I steered away from there. I ended up at the picnic tables where everyone usually eats and there was an announcement saying that you had to participate in activities or you would get detention since, you're here for a reason, not just to live life in tents. So I signed us up for the next event assuming you don't want to get grounded"


"What is it?"


"I don't really know, I guess they'll explain it there. It's tomorrow morning and we'll have to wake up pretty early. Oh, and the rest of our friends are going to be there as well since they hadn't signed up for anything either. I think Alex, Jack, Ray, Ryan, Tay and Mikey are going to be there. Hayley, Brendon and Jenna might come but they've been participating in most of the activities so they don't need to. I guess Pete's gotta be there too"


I sighed. "I really hope this goes well"

Chapter Text



I somehow managed to actually go to the place where the activities began (this weird sort of field) and regretted it instantly, since I saw how everything was set up. Maybe detention would've been better.


We were quickly organised into five teams, and of course, Frank and I were separated. He was with Pete, Ryan and Hayley while I was with Mikey and Brendon. A few other nice classmates were with me as well, like Jaime and Jenna. Frank had rotten luck and was with some pretty bitchy people who just should've stayed home and not have gone on this trip at all. Oh yes, he was with the stuck-up rich snobs. They always go annoying everyone, and the best thing to do is ignore them.


The teachers who were there to supervise began explaining the activity. It was like a big game with different sections. First, you had run with a spoon in your mouth with an egg on it until you reached the first checkpoint. Then, you had to spin around fifteen times and try to thread a needle. When you did that, you had to climb a tree, in your dizzy state, and grab one of the ribbons on the branches. After that, you had to try and fit five marshmallows inside your mouth. Finally, you had to crawl through this field so wet; it wasn't mud, the grass was basically five centimetres underwater.


One of the teachers blew a whistle, and the game began. Brendon was running for my team, and Hayley was running for Frank's. In the first bit, Ray was competing, and he kept dropping the whole spoon, not just the egg. I shook my head.


The competitors reached the needle, and after spinning fifteen times, Brendon managed to do it on his first try. Hayley spent a lot of time trying to do it, but she managed to catch up pretty quickly in the tree-climbing part since she's an expert at that (also nimble as fuck) and Brendon sucked since he was still a bit dizzy. In the marshmallow part, Brendon beat Hayley by a lot and, showing off; he added two more in his mouth.


"ow de uck an you oo da" she said (or tried to since you really can't speak with that much marshmallows inside your mouth) probably meaning "how the fuck can you do that."


Apparently, Brendon interpreted 'Hayley Language" the same way I did because he took the marshmallows out of his mouth and said, "well, I have gotten practice with something else" and then winked.


Hayley groaned when she understood what he meant. Well, she couldn't actually groan, and the marshmallows just fell out of her mouth in an absolutely revolting way. Naturally, she just grinned. 


Meanwhile, all this had happened, another classmate called Zack, who I'm pretty sure was one of Jack's friends or exes, whatever, was nearly at the finish line. They quickly noticed that and just dived into the (flooded) mud field trying to make up for the time that they had lost fooling around, but after a few seconds, Zack won. 


The next person on my team to race was Jaime, and amongst the other people, he was against Jack and Alex. Uh oh. Those two are the most competitive pair I have ever seen in my entire life, and I don't think this will end up pretty.


I was right. In the first part, they tried to trip each other up multiple times. Then they tried to push the other off the tree while attempting to reach the ribbons at the same times. Finally, in the mud section, they ended up falling and began fighting on the wet ground. Their petty mud brawl distracted the other two competitors, Kellin (who was on Frank's team) and a girl whose name I don't know, but Jaime kept on running, and in the end, finally won. Maybe it's because Jenna promised him a burrito if he made us win.


After Jaime, Jenna was up against Pete, who was on Frank's team. Pete is a gay walking disaster, so when he finally managed to thread the needle, Jenna was already putting marshmallows in her mouth. I was supposed to go next, so I was wondering how on earth was I supposed to do this. I have literally no physical abilities or coordination whatsoever. I was lucky, though, because just then, something made the game stop.


A few of the rich snobs (the most stuck up pair of girls in history with the meanest boy in our class) were annoying Frank. How? I don't know, they were just talking to him, and he looked very uncomfortable. Ryan butted in the 'conversation' with a dark look on his face and started arguing with the other kids, probably defending Frank or standing his ground. He was clenching his fists, possibly to prevent himself from doing something stupid. I turned my attention back to the race and suddenly heard a loud crack, and a sharp cry rang out. 


I turned to look what happened, and I saw the boy with what appeared to be a broken nose with blood spurting out of it and Ryan clutching his hand, probably broken as well since I don't think he's ever punched anyone ever. 


Ryan turned around to see if Frank was ok and the boy was about to punch him back when Pete, having heard the ruckus, came up from behind and tackled him. Ryan turned around and was about to punch the boy again since he had yelled something at him I couldn't quite make out to be what it was, but the teachers finally reached the scene.


I couldn't hear what the teachers were saying, but I caught bits and pieces of what Ryan was.


"...IT WASNT MY FAULT, HE...BUT I WAS JUST DEFENDING...STANDING UP FOR FRIENDS IS IMPORTANT..." I couldn't make out much else, but Ryan was probably going to get two weeks worth of detention. The other kid got just one week since he didn't actually hurt anyone physically.


I noticed Frank was eyeing what had happened, but he suddenly turned around and began walking into the forest, in the direction of the creek he loves so much, probably trying to get away from this mess he probably thinks he had created. 


I accidentally caught Ryan's eye, who at the moment was still arguing with the teachers, and having seen the boy run into the trees, made a motion suggesting I followed Frank into the forest.


I took one last look at my peers and at Ryan, who just winked and lifted a thumbs up sign, and I disappeared into the woods as well, searching for my Frank.















that dude had it coming-

Chapter Text



I ignored them. I wasn't in the mood to talk to them.

"why are you so rude, oh my god"

If you don't like me, then why are you even trying to talk to me.

"come on, I have a question. since you always wear black and you're, uh, like you are, are you a gay emo"

"no" that was the first word I managed to muster.

She's got it wrong. I'm not gay. I am asexual. And biromantic. Not gay. I'm also not emo. I'm punk.

I felt a bit better because I remembered that Gerard would call me that and I called him a goth boy. I was quickly brought back to reality because she was staring at me.

"what are you looking at"

"oh nothing. but if you're not gay, how come you haven't dated anyone?"

god I wish she would shut up.

then a blond guy arrived.

"yeah, fag, how come you haven't dated anyone yet"

I just wish he could just shut up, shut up, shut his stupid mouth.

"maybe he hasn't dated anyone cause he doesn't want to or actually has standards, not like you do apparently"

I thank god Ryan had decided to step in at that moment.

"well, you haven't dated anyone either, how do I know that you're not a fag"

"you don't. and also, don't call Frank that, and don't say that word"

"well what are you going to do about it fag, punch m-"


Ryan had done exactly that. Blood was spurting out of the blond boy's broken nose. I don't really know what happened, it was all a blur but I saw Pete jump on top of that guy and tackle him to the ground. The teachers arrived and I couldn't take it anymore, I just turned around and left.

I was walking, not in any direction in particular, but away from the scene this time, not Gerard.

Why did I have to be so stupid. I could have stood up for myself, I could have said something but since I didn't, the boy ended up getting hurt and Ryan who defended me, ended up in detention. And me, who had been in the center, ended up being the last one standing, how did this make sense. I should be the one with a broken nose, I should be the one wasting their afternoon in a ratty classroom.

I ended up on the creek's edge, exactly like yesterday and I sat down on the edge. I took my shoes and socks off and submerged my feet in the really cold water, numbing them up completely.

I wanted to be numb again. Just like my feet were at the moment. Feelings sucked and no one should have to go through the pain of having them.

why couldn't I say anything?

I pulled out my utility knife from my pocket, screw it, I didn't care how long I had been clean, I guess I'd have to restart the clock again.

I lifted the blade against my arm and I suddenly Gerard appeared from behind me. I tried to hide the knife but it was too late, he had already seen it. Shit.

I retracted the blade back into its shell carefully before putting it in my pocket. Gerard sat down next to me and left a hand outstretched. I sighed and reluctantly fished the object out of my pocket and onto his outstretched hand.

"Wanna talk about it?" Gerard finally asked after neither of us had spoken or even moved for a couple minutes.

I shook my head and turned it away because I didn't want him to see me cry. He must have caught on because he just turned me around and hugged me. I cried into his chest and he held me close as we both shook thanks to how hard I was sobbing.

I finally calmed down after a while and let go of him. I dangled my legs back over the edge of the creek again and Gerard did the same, right beside me. When he put his hands next to him to hold up his upper body so he wouldn't fall on his back, he accidentally lay his hand on top of mine. I nearly exploded on the inside and I liked it a lot. Though I didn't protest he still took his hand away, how sad.

I gathered all the courage I could muster and did something I never would have done under normal circumstances. I took his hand and held it in mine. Gerard's face immediately turned red and I just smiled to myself because this was nice.

The river kept on flowing, the crickets had started chirping and the sun was slowly setting, disappearing behind the trees, only leaving long orange rays behind, illuminating the clearing in which we were sitting, by the edge of the creek.

Gerard was blushing at this point, in a ridiculous manner. I don't really know why, we're just holding hands, it doesn't mean anything to him since he doesn't like me in the way that I like him.

It was really nice to be like this, I was really enjoying myself but I felt like I needed to do something else, or that something was missing.


And at that moment I realized that I needed to do something, I couldn't talks this anymore. The boy next to me who had been nothing but kind to me the whole time was just sitting there, with a sparkle in his eyes and when looked into mine, something inside me snapped and I was pushed over the edge. I finally did something I had been wanting to do for a long time.

I kissed him.

kissed him. I kissed him.

I actually kissed him.

The moment our lips finally connected, he was startled but he melted into the kiss, kissing me back with passion but softly, as if he didn't want to hurt the fragile person he was getting to know and that had just stopped crying into his chest.

Chapter Text



A few hours later, after the whole incident, we were gathered around your typical campfire you see everywhere (books, movies, etc.) but at least no one was playing Wonderwall on an acoustic guitar.

There was a different sort of mood in the air, everyone was relaxed and happy, unlike the tension and hostility that there had been at the time of the incident.

Gerard, Hayley, Ray, Mikey, Tay and Jenna were playing truth or dare and I saw Jenna blushing, probably denying something since she was shaking her head and the rest were cracking up. Pete was a bit far away talking and trying to play a game of tic-tac-toe in the dirt with a reluctant Jack. Ryan was just sprawled out on his back resting his head on Brendon, smiling and talking to him. There was also a group a bit further away made up of kids that are nice but aren't really my friends who were playing some type of game I'm too lazy to try to understand.

I could see that everyone was having a great time and having a break from exhausting reality. Well, most of them.

Alex was all by himself, back propped up against a tree and hands hidden in his sleeves. I sat down next to him.

"are you okay?"

I didn't get a vocal answer, he just nodded, probably not trusting himself to speak but I could obviously see through it.

"I don't believe you, what's the problem?"

He stayed silent. I didn't think he was going to answer but after a minute he decided I was someone he could trust and uttered a small word.


It was said in such a quiet way I could've missed it but you could sense how hurt he was by the way he said it and looked over at him, across the campfire.

Jack didn't really look good either. I quietly observed him and Pete since Alex wasn't going to speak again and saw him with a miserable look too, despite Pete's efforts to cheer him up. After a lot of useless attempts, Jack spotted someone in the distance and went up to him. It was Zack and Alex frowned when he saw them.

I heard Alex mutter something to himself and then he told me that he had to leave since he had something to do. It was complete and utter bullshit but I let him, since being here wasn't going to help him just one bit.

I approached the group where Gerard was sat at playing truth or dare and saw that Pete had joined the game as well. I sat in between then and and rested my head on Gerard's shoulder who then later began running his fingers through my hair.

Pete then got dared to kiss the prettiest person in the group and he just smirked. He took his phone out of his pocket and proceeded to take a selfie.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing" Jenna began but just groaned when she saw that he kissed his phone screen. Pete had done the modern equivalent of kissing a mirror, that egotistical funny motherfucker that he was.

Ray then was asked what was his most embarrassing moment ever and he said that it was when he accidentally set his chemistry teacher's pants on fire by accident in seventh grade. Mikey was dared to eat dirt (gee, how original), Tay was dared to pickpocket something off Jenna which she actually did manage, she got her watch off her wrist. Hayley was then dared to do something but it was a secret so she just took off without and explanation.

Gerard was then dared to basically do the outside foresty version of seven minutes in heaven, he was just dared to go a bit into the woods and be alone with Pete for a while.

When they came back Gerard didn't have that annoyed expression on his face that he would get whenever he heard Pete speak and Pete wasn't rolling his eyes anymore like he did when Gerard put on that annoyed expression. That's, good, I guess.

"I don't hate him anymore" Gerard said as he sat down beside me again and put his hand in mine.

"Wait, really?" I was in disbelief. I mean since Gerard met him, his despised him with a passion.

"Yeah, he's actually much nicer than I thought. I'm not annoyed that he's basically Mikey's boyfriend at this point"

"Talking about boyfriends, isn't that what we are now?"

"I guess so. Frank, would you like to be my boyfriend?"

"Sure" I smiled and kissed him quickly before anyone could actually see.

At that moment I saw one specific redhead who had vanished earlier reappear behind an unsuspecting Pete, holding what appeared to be a raw egg in her hand. Hayley winked at us and then smashed the egg on his head.


ok, so this is the end of the book o guess. I'll probably do a sequel after I finish this collection. as you can see, I focused a lot on Alex and Jack in this chapter since it's all leading up to book 2, the jalex one which I'm currently writing. Gerard can finally stand Pete, which is important but you won't know why until the third book, which is the petekey one. the fourth book isn't going to be ryden since that ship already has a prequel, which is "my best friend is a ghost", a story which I'm currently updating. book four will most likely to be jardougall, frerard part 2 or maybe nothing at all, just the end of the series, we'll see later on.

I hope you liked this book, alex is now out-