I finally got up from sitting on the ground. Picking up the robotic arm, I turned around and looked up at my red car. Two of my soldiers were sitting in the front seats. Sighing, I walked over and pulled myself into the back seat. “Let’s go.” That’s all I said before looking out the window at the rubble of my giant robot, which was now in pieces on the ground. The shining metal harpoon going through the control panel made me wince. Thomas’s words repeated in my head I’m not your friend! Along with, I thought we were friends! from Edward. My heart sank. I’m such a fool how could i even relatively think that this was a good idea? Power hungry, I thought. The one thing I needed to help my army was laid out in pieces on the ground because I was power hungry. I don’t… I can’t… my head is spinning at a million miles per hour right now; I’m too dizzy to think. I felt my eyes close as a sudden tiredness rushed over me. I can’t stay awake, I know I can’t fight it, but what if I die? I mean, in that short period of time I did lose a lot of blood even when my arm was bandaged up. I groaned a little as I let my eyes fall closed. The last thing I saw was Thomas, Edward, and Matthew walking along the sidewalk to Thomas’s new house. I couldn’t believe I was so close to ending something that needed to be over, but instead I broke the only true friendship I had. What’s wrong with me?
I woke up, but not in the car, nor in a room. Okay, maybe it was a room I actually wasn’t sure. I was tired and the pain hurt a lot. what hurts? Why am i hurting? What? I thought, I looked around and saw nothing but black until I looked down where I was standing. Where my feet were placed, there was red. Not like blood just …. Bright red like my hoodie maybe brighter like a light of some sort. It was just around my feet. I took a step back. The red bloomed under my feet again, but there was still a print where I was standing before, but it faded after a few seconds. I put my hands in front of my face. I could see me perfectly fine. I didn’t have to squint to see. It was like... there was a light on me but, I had no shadow. I was severely confused; and not knowing where I was just confused me more. What? I groaned a little and started to walk around, looking for a way out of this odd place. I saw someone in the distance. It made me feel uneasy- very uneasy. I quickly made my way over to the person. I found that it was three people. It was them why are they here? Thomas, standing farthest away, and Edward, standing the closest with Matthew in the middle. My stomach churned when Thomas looked at me coldly. A shiver went through my body. I hadn’t felt this feeling in a long time It was fear. I was scared. Why? I didn’t know. I slowed to a stop to look at them. My legs locked up as Thomas started towards me. I couldn’t move. Why can’t I Move? Move damn it! Thomas’s hands were clenched into fists. He started to come at me quicker.
“Tom, wait,” Edward reached out to Thomas.
My legs could finally move. I began to run, but stumbled and fell, although I didn’t stop trying to get away. I crawled back away from him, getting on my feet and running. He grabbed my hood, pulling me back choking me. I coughed at the pressure on my neck. The rough pull was enough to bring my back to the ground, knocking the air out of my lungs. Gasping for breath, I looked up at him, terror glazing my eyes as I watched him pull out his bass guitar, Susan, from his hoodie pocket.
How it fit in there, I’m not sure but i know one thing. I wasn’t focused on logic I was focused on what he was going to do with the bass. “Thomas! Wait please!” I screamed as he raised his bass above his head.
“ Burn in Hell, fucking commie,” Thomas said as he swung the solid instrument down at my head. Tears filled my eyes, too shocked to roll out of the way, I gasped the last few milliseconds before the bass came down between my eyes.
I shot up, gasping and holding my forehead where the base would have hit. It was bright- very bright- as my eyes adjusted to the bright room. A faint beeping started to become audible, ringing in my ears. Some pain started to catch up to me; I was wincing at it. The sting on my face and arm began to intensify. My mind and body started to come back to reality. Was it a dream? Wait… I’m confused, I’m not in my room like I requested. Did I request to be in my room? I’m not sure to be completely honest, I thought. I looked around, squinting at how bright the room was. It was then that the beeping was starting to become annoying. As I rested my hand in my lap, I realized after a minute of watching my heart beat on the monitor that I was in the hospital. Wait, maybe I’m in the medical area of the base? Am I home ? I have no idea. For all I know, those two idiots took me to a actual hospital after I passed out. I swear to God, if they did I’m gonna- my thoughts were interrupted when Oh! Speak of the devils, It’s the two idiots, but they’re my most trusted soldiers, too. I looked over to them as they slowly walked over to me. They seemed nervous… well they seemed several emotions right now, I raised a brow at them as the taller one of the two, Patryck, looked at me, inspecting
“Your up! How do you feel sir?” he asked as calmly as he could. His voice cracked as he spoke, showing be he was overly emotional at the moment. I responded after a minute of processing what Patryck asked.
“Indeed, I am awake…” I sighed and mumbled a “Thank God” before finishing my sentence. “ I hurt. I feel hungry and a bit dizzy. My head is throbbing.... ugh... “ I took more details of the room in... and myself... my right arm was in a sling and thickly bandaged. The brownish red did show in small blotches here and there, but they seemed to look more like a sweat stain then a blood stain. My Left hand lifted as I rubbed my forehead, noticing bandage around the right side of my face. I allowed my hand to feel down my bandaged cheek and onto my neck. There were more bandages. Sighing, I tucked my hand under my right arm. “How long was it dead?” I asked, a joking tone hinting in my voice, the image of the bass coming toward my face flashed in my eyes. I flinched slightly.
Paul, The shorter more--how do I say--chubby of the two finally spoke up. “Heh… fourteen weeks, sir.” My eyes widened. Fourteen weeks? What’s that, three and a half months? Oh… Oh man that-that’s why was I out for so long?
“Soldier! Tell me why was I out for so long!” My voice raised from the sudden shock of what was supposed to be a small nap that turned into a 4 month coma. What’s today’s date? Oh, god all those important meetings I had set up with other armies, who’s been running this one! I started to slightly show I was panicking.
“Sir, calm yourself,” Paul insisted, putting up his hands. “ Everything is fine. Everything has been taken care of, The blood loss got to you by the time we got here, the back of the car was soaked in blood, so we quickly brought you in and they promptly rushed you away.” I Blinked at him like there was supposed to be more. Patryk must have realized the question I was about to ask. “ You went into a coma due to a head injury from the crash-”
“The crash?” I asked, cutting him off. The two soldiers only looked at each other and looked back at me.
“ Yes, the crash …. you know the giant, red robot?” I looked at them partly confused trying to remember.
“.... Ah! I see… it's just …. a bit …. foggy right now. I remember little bits like how Edward asked if we were friends, and how Thomas had exclaimed that we were not.” There was a long pause. “I can't seem to remember much more. The robot exploded and-” I broke off. “ How did it explode? Wait, I remember my arm got hit with something sharp. It was metal, pointed, and long? A spear? I-I can't remember exactly.”
I tried to remember My “friends” faces but it seemed a bit clouded like as if a cloud covered their faces. I can only recall a few details: Edward smiled a lot and was a bit chubby. Matthew was fairly tall, and his chin was a bit more square compared to the others. And, I remember Thomas was-he was taller then me, but I can't remember how tall exactly, and his eyes were different from everyone else's. How? I can’t remember.
“Memory loss?” Paul asked, looking at Patryk who only nodded.
“Probably, but he seems to know a lot more and is forgetting only a few details. So, with some effort, he’ll regain them... at least somewhat.” Patryck seemed so sure about his words …. or he’s repeating the medic in his own words.
I want to see myself in the mirror. I decided to get up wincing a little the two soldiers tried to keep me on the bed, but I yelled at them in frustration. I know for a fact that I’m stubborn. They ended up helping me in my almost celestial ascension from my over-glorified hospital bed. I put my left foot down first then my right. Pain stung me in a few spots, but I tried to brush it off. The soldiers helped me get to the bathroom. I limped over to the sink, looking in the mirror. I could see some of the scarring from under the bandages on my face.
I looked … dead to be completely honest. My right arm, which was bandaged and in a sling, felt numb. I stared at my fingers through the mirror and tried to wiggle them. Nothing. I tried to move my elbow. Nothing again. I moved to my shoulder. I paused. That moves just fine. So, from my elbow down, my arm doesn’t work …. Great. I sighed, going back to the bed to rest. What will I do when I’m not in this room? How with the other soldiers react when they find out our plan with the robot can’t be completed till we build a completely new one? How will they react when they find out their leader has forgotten things and is now handicapped? ‘They’ll reject you and throw you out’ A voice in the back of my head whispered to me. I started to think about that. What will I do if I get thrown out? I have no place to go. Unless Edward accepts me back ‘till I get my own place. I don’t even know where he is! Let alone--how would I convince him to take me back? How can I even convince him if I can barely remember what he looks like? I was stressing. What about Thomas? And Matthew? How would they react? I’m a dead man out there, still wanted: dead or alive with a pretty pound over my head. I would be executed on the spot-- who knows, maybe my execution would be done publicly depending on who caught me.
I was lost in thought ‘till i felt a hand on my left shoulder, I looked up at Paul.
“Are you alright Red Leader?” concern filled his voice. Red Leader? I looked at my arm, I don't deserve that title. I don’t deserve a title that makes grown men have nightmares for weeks.
“I’m alright Paul. Just fine… just tired.” I breathed out, closing my eyes.
“Get some rest, sir. We’ll be back tomorrow.” Patryk smiled slightly at me, and I flashed one back as they walked out of the room. I leaned back on the bed, grabbing the remote to the TV. My eyes glanced upon my phone before I glanced at the monitor, turning it on. Some weird show was on in a language I didn’t understand, which was odd, considering I knew quite a few languages. It’s probably some a baby show, I told myself. I changed the channel quickly. I began to doze off. My eyes and shoulders felt heavy. I sighed, turning off the tv and getting ready to retire when my phone rang. Loudly. Not thinking about it I looked for my phone. once I found it, I answered it without looking to see who it was. “Red Leader, hvem er det?” I mumbled my native language into the phone.
“Tord?” I felt sick and I didn’t know why the voice sounds so familiar, I felt like crying but I don't know why.
“Hello,” I inhaled a shaky breath “,w-who is this?” I questioned as tears started to stain the bandages on my face. “You answered! Oh god. Thank god you’re okay! “ I flinched at the suddenly happy voice.
“ You didn’t answer my q-question,” I swallowed hard before continuing, “ Who is this?” the person stayed quiet for a moment.
“It’s me, Edd.” He seemed hurt. Edd? Edward? Is that why I feel-- why I am crying... Do I feel guilty? These questions raced through my head as Edd spoke again. “Are you okay? You sound like you’re crying” thanks for stating the obvious, Edd.
“E-eh? No. No I’m not crying, Edd. Not a bit…. Sick is all, no worries!” That is a complete lie …. Ugh, I’m a disappointment to my army.
“I… Tord… Why? Why are you lying? I want to know the truth.” Edward sighed as I started to choke on my sobs. Why? Why am I crying? I’m the leader of the feared Red Army! I am the Red Leader! The Red fucking Leader! I shouldn’t have that label… I’m pathetic… Ugh!
“Edd. I’m not lying, I’m just a bit sick, okay?” I’m lying … damn it! Faen! I can’t do this anymore I can’t keep lying …. It hurts. “Just come to town some time and we can talk about …. What happened ok? I just want to know you were ok and that … you didn’t die.” I heard his voice crack as he chuckled. I huffed pulling my ear away from the cell phone to see what time it was, quickly doing the math in between the time zones. “Go to bed edd …. It's late.” I said.
Edward made an annoyed sound “But you’re awake-”
“But I just woke up,” I cut him off. Edward made another annoyed sound.
“Fine,” he yawned. “Just come visit me sometime or at someplace, please.”
“Alright edd I’ll see what I can do…. Now get some sleep.” Edward hummed and replied with an ‘aright’, then we said our good-byes and hung up.
My eyes and cheeks felt uncomfortable from the dry tears that resided. Why did I cry? I don't cry to pain, I don’t cry to death, but I fucking cry to guilt? That's another feeling I haven't felt in awhile too huh…. Well I need to get back on track. I looked over to the clock, I’m wide awake, and it’s one o'clock in the morning here in Norway. Groaning, I rose up and out of bed stumbling a bit due to my wounds. The explosion fucked me up a lot… Ugh… I need a cigar… I need ten cigars right now. I grabbed my clothes out of the medical bag sitting on one of the chairs in the room, and quickly put on the clothes, ripping the IV and cords off of myself. The flatline filled the room with its sharp, continuous beep. It annoyed the piss out of me. I turned off the machine, hoping no one had noticed it yet. I slipped on my shoes, and moved to adorn my favorite red sweater. The whole right sleeve was ripped off, and my poor hoodie was burnt and covered in my own dried blood. Finally, I walked out of that damn bleach-smelling room.
God, the whole section of the base smelt as though someone was trying to cover up a murder scene. I mean, technically, occasionally, they were. I was just happy to be leaving it. Ganted, I had to sneak out. I was very anxious to get back to my office and start plans to rebuild that robot--maybe even continue the true plans for this army. That sounded fantastic actually. I snuck through the soldier-filled halls as these thoughts swirled through my brain, giving me inspiration. Finally, I had made it. Grinning to myself, I opened the door to my office and walked in, nothing had changed since I’d left except for the old, dead flowers that were on my paper cluttered desk,. They had been alive and well when I left.
I sat back in my leather swivel chair. It was way more comfortable than that bed. That comfiness only lasted about a minute. After that minute is when I realized I needed to get so much work done, and I needed it done now. I groaned loudly as I slid a small stack of papers in front of me. I really, really didn’t want to do all of that damned paperwork. See, the only thing that really makes me dislike this job and rank is all the paperwork it comes with, but this place would fall apart if no one ran it so… lucky me. I felt my head slowly fall into my arms onto my desk. Everything was black.
I shot up from my desk, knocking a few papers off and cursing under my breath. I must’ve fallen asleep while filling these out. I stood up from my chair, picking the papers up and setting them on my desk. I looked down at my clothes, and quickly went to my wardrobe. I needed to change out of these cursed ones. I threw my hoodie off and slipped out of my ripped pants, kicking them to the side I opened my wardrobe. I finally got to see fully what my body had become. There were many new scars on it: a few on my right leg. The side of my arm seemed to have gotten the worst of it. My face was likewise. But my arm, my arm didn’t move; it was useless. I grabbed a new hoodie, and a coat with a fluffy hood along with my uniform’s dark blue overcoat that I have to wear. Slipping them on one at a time, I had some trouble. I got them all on eventually. Tightening the red belt around my waist, I looked at my reflection once more, surprised that I managed to get my clothes on by myself. I looked at my right eye, yes, it’s still there, but it’s dull like a white glaze was over it fading my pupil, I don’t have time for this. I walked back at my desk, looking at my now sloppy signature from writing with my left hand instead of my right. It wasn’t horrible; it just wasn’t as neat.
I pulled down a rolled map that had been written on with red sharpie. I circled the other bases owned by the red army--by me. The feeling of having that much power was almost intoxicating. Knowing that, I started this new plan on my own and watched it expand into an almost genius arrangement.
“What a sight,” I said out loud, breaking the silence of my office. I smiled proudly at my work, but my smile quickly diminished. In retrospect, the real reason I’d ended up in the medical region of the base had been because of that same feeling of power. I ruined everything. All of my plans need to be rebuilt and put on hold.
“Ugh, I don’t need to deal with this! The idiots in my army are enough stress to deal with,” my yelling seemed to echo throughout my lonely office.