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Hiraeth

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“Live.” Those last words the person she cared most for, said to her, before the grails vessel granted her vessels wish. Blond hair, and crimson red eyes are all that fills her mind, as Ruler Hakuno’s Noble Phantasm slowly vanishes, now that her vessel is gone. Ruler gave most of her mana to the girl in front of her, with long snow white hair. With no extra mana to supply her reality marble, she has no choice, but to disengage her Noble Phantasm.

Ruler’s mahogany eyes narrow, at the young girl, the grails vessel, body starting to fall forward, Ruler moves her own body quickly, in order to catch her.

“Illya!” Ruler calls out, as the small girls falls into her arms.

“I’m so glad….so glad, that you’re still here Ruler.” Illya mutters.

Ruler’s eyes dart around, as the reality marble around them, fades away slowly, like a dream.

“Don’t talk. Save your strength. Even if I did give you most of my mana, pulling off a feat, that is, sending my younger self back to Uruk, had to have drained you mentally, and physically.”

The girl in Ruler’s arms giggles, like a small child. “So serious. You’re so serious, Hakuno. You have a real body now, you should be happy.” Illya whispers, finally closing her eyes, resting her head against Hakuno’s chest.

Ruler frowns, calling her by her true name….she sighs, deciding to let it go. She needs to hand off this girl, whose now fast asleep in her arms, to someone, if she remembers correctly, the blond Saber should still be around here somewhere..

Damn. Ruler looks at her surroundings, charred earth all around her. They really did a number on this place.

The stench of smoke, and ash is almost too much for her senses. Ruler lets out a disgruntled sound, as hops out of the deep hole, that was created when the grail was summoned.

Enkidu would be so upset, at the destruction of this forest. It could have been a whole lot worse, if her younger self, didn’t stop the grails mud when she did.

Her heart hurts at the thought of her lovers best friend.

No, she can’t think about that right now.

“Ruler!” A voice calls out to her.

Ruler turns around, still holding the tired girl in her arms, as a girl with long black hair, a boy with redish hair, and torn clothes, and the blond Saber, Ruler was originally looking for, run up to her.

“Rin, Shirou!” Ruler calls back. Damn, now her own body’s fatigue is catching up to her.

This is why she didn’t want a real body. She didn’t want to become a human again.

“You’re okay!” Shirou gives Ruler a small smile, his eyes dirfting to Illya.

“And you have Illya too!”

“She’s tired.” Ruler holds out her arms, to pass the small girl, off to her big brother, who accepts.  

“Thank you, Ruler.” Saber utters, her eyes soften upon realizing that Caster Gilgamesh’s assessment was correct.

She promised that king she would look after this woman.

“It would appear, that my Master has gotten her wish granted.”

Saber glances at the golden Caster, this man who is much different from the Archer Gilgamesh that she’s come to know.

“Gilgamesh…”

“I have a feeling that my Master, will try to find a way to make Ruler happy as well.” Caster Gilgamesh turns his attention the short blonde hair boy, or are they a girl? Next to him, speaking in a language, that Saber has never heard before. They instantly stand up, at Gilgamesh’s words.

“As I was saying, as much as I hate to ask you, Saber, I would like you to look after, my queen’s Ruler self.”

Saber raises an eyebrow at that request. Is this man seriously, asking her for help?!

“I do not understand, why you feel the need to request my help, King of Heroes.”

“Hakuno’s other self, has had…..a rough life, so to speak. With myself, our children, my friend, and my younger self, heading back to our homeland, there is no one here to watch over her. I do not know, if my other self is actually dead or not. Hence, I am asking you.”

“I do not think you are thinking this through, Gilgamesh. In case you’ve forgotten, all the servants should be heading back to the throne of heroes soon.”

That causes the man standing across from her to scoff. “In the off chance you don’t return to the throne of heroes, I would like you to do as I asked.”

As always, this man knows more than he lets on.

Saber ponders for a moment, there’s no reason to refuse his request, and now that she is sure, that Ruler is Hakuno….well, she would like to know about her. She’s played adviser to Hakuno many times before, so watching over her shouldn’t be too difficult.

“I’ll do as you requested, Gilgamesh.” Saber finally responds, her eyes, focused on Ruler’s Noble Phantasm.

“Good. I would hate to have to forcefully make you do as I ask.” Caster teases. “Remember, that is my woman I am entrusting you with. If I find out that you have let anything happen to her, the next time we meet, I will not be lenient with you.”

“How are you feeling, Ruler?” Saber finally asks.

Ruler waves her hand. “I am tired, if I’m being honest with you.”

Of course she would be, anyone would be tired using a Noble Phantasm that powerful, servant or not.

“Do you have anywhere to go, Ruler?” Tohsaka, lightly touches Ruler’s hand.

Does she? She supposes she doesn’t, her vessels home was burned down.

Great. A new body, but no home to go to, no income to survive with. Off to a great start.

“No.” Ruler replies honestly.

Tohsaka and Shirou share a glance. “Why don’t you come to back to this guys place?” Tohsaka nods her head in Shirou’s direction. “I’m staying there as well, and so is Saber. You won’t be alone.”

“You won’t be alone.” Ruler inwardly laughs. She’s all alone again.  

“Tohsaka is right.” Shirou chimes in. “You’re welcome in my home, after what you’ve done for Illya.”

Ruler looks away, slightly embarrassed. “It was nothing…”

A slight pain runs through Ruler’s body. Dammit, the fatigue is really hitting her now.

“I-It’s fine, I’ll be okay. I don’t need you kids, to take care of me.” Ruler takes one step forward, before her body is falling to the ground.

Her world turns black.

Alone, Alone, Alone.  

Those thoughts snap Ruler awake. She brings a hand up to her face, groaning.

Where the hell is she? She looks around her surroundings, and sighs when she realizes that she’s back at that boy Shirou’s home.  

She stands up slowly, heading to the nearby window, to look up at the moonlight.

How long was she out for? She must have slept all day, into the night.

Alone.

That word keeps replaying over and over in her head, like a bad movie. Glancing down at the wedding band on her finger, she slides it off with her other hand.

This man lied to her. Again.

Said he would never leave her alone again, but yet here she is. Alone. Again. With a group of kids, all by herself. Again.

She’ll never see those arrogant eyes again, never see that half smile Gilgamesh would throw her way, will never get to hold him in her arms again.

Gods, she’s so angry. Ruler takes the small sliver wedding band into her palm, and begins to throw it out the window, but stops herself, falling to the cold floor, and bringing her knees up to her chest.

She does something she hasn’t done, since her Caster died in front of her.

She cries.