They carve a path on the bridge, past the stairwells, past the subway entrances, past the populated streets. Tall, thin apartment buildings with scattered lights run parallel to one another on either side of the sidewalk. Below the residences, small businesses with bright, welcoming signs in baby blues and fuchsias flash to attract customers.
It’s captivating, National City’s nightlife.
Into the quieter areas, they stumble through dark streets and alleyways with gentle laughter bubbling inside their chests, being foolish and nonsensical as they look at one another.
There is no one in sight, and for the time being, she and Lena are, effectively, alone.
There’s a breeze that prettily tousles Lena’s hair, black curls falling over black curls. When Lena slows down a little, with a grin on her face, Kara exhales softly and smiles as she stretches her arm towards Lena with her palm open. Lena doesn't hesitate as she tangles her fingers with Kara’s.
The concrete and sidewalks glimmer like stars and reflect off passing cars. Small puddles dyed deep green, crisp yellow, and blood-red paint the street, changing with the stoplights. Kara captures these images in her mind, stores them somewhere for her to recall later.
They come across through quieter neighbourhoods and alleyways, running and then not running—filling the air between them with more laughter and foolishness. Kara’s heart feels as light as a butterfly wing. She gives Lena’s hand a squeeze, leading her to somewhere, a place that is more private and familiar. Where there is no noise from the outside world and where they could be just them, just be—
Making a detour and into another alleyway, it’s Lena who stops first, pulling Kara into a hug. Her back hits against the brick wall as she wraps her arms around Kara’s shoulders.
“So, maybe I should’ve said yes to you flying me back instead of running back,” Lena says, burying her face in Kara’s neck.
She lets out a quiet laugh against Kara’s skin. With her hands on Kara’s back, slipping underneath Kara’s shirt, she seems to be taking as much warmth as she can, like a cat seeking the warmest spot, as she rubs her nose on Kara’s collarbone.
Kara finds it infinitely adorable. It’s cold—really cold outside, Kara understands.
“We’re almost home,” Kara whispers, and Lena pulls her face back to look at Kara.
There’s a silence.
Lena’s eyes widen a bit, as if to take in what Kara just said, lips parting gently.
“This feels familiar,” Lena jokes, eyes going left and right. Her cheeks go pink a little.
Running past through streets and alleyways in the middle of the night, acting like silly, carefree teenagers. Kara smiles softly. Nods.
“You know that time when we were at the bar with our friends… and when we were running back to your penthouse,” Kara mumbles, and it comes out low and gentle. She draws a long, disjointed breath, before resting her forehead against Lena’s. “That was when I really realized it. What you do to me—just how much I adore you, and think about you. I just... I've always loved you, Lena.”
Fingers clutch the fabric of Kara’s coat tightly. The familiar sound of a heart beating fast reaches Kara’s ears, and it makes Kara smile.
Lena’s eyes bore right through her, not analysing or judging; they’re contradicting, both all-knowingly and all-questioning.
“Home,” Lena repeats, quietly.
“Yes. Um.” Kara licks her lips and adjusts her glasses. “Your place. We don’t have to do anything, it’s just, you know, we should probably talk some more? Also, I kind of wanna sleep with you. Not necessarily like that, just like, sleep-sleep—”
Her breath uneven as she rambles, a terribly embarrassing, shy smile on her face, and the whole thing is gradually falling apart at the seams—Lena laughs like a music box, like pins plucking gentle clear notes out of the prongs of a steel comb, like something you really would want to put in a box and wind up over and over again.
“I understand, but personally I would like to have sex,” Lena says, causing Kara’s thought process to halt and forgetting words exist.
“Lena,” she says, biting the inside of her cheek.
Lena only grins. Still the same Lena—of course.
“You’re so cute.”
It’s Kara who leans in first, fingers along Lena’s jaw turning her face towards her, and closing the distance between them. Lena’s mouth opens for her, exchanging slick and soft kisses.
“Rao,” Kara whispers, pulling back slightly, and exhales against Lena’s lips as she rests their foreheads together, her breath condensing into tiny effervescent clouds in the night air.
She keeps that distance, the stillness, trying to imprint in her mind exactly how she feels, exactly how it happened. And they stay like that, just breathing for a few moments, Lena’s hands now curled into Kara’s shirt, Kara’s hand coming up to stroke Lena’s hair.
“We should keep going, your building is just right over there,” Kara says. Gently, she thumbs at the pulse that beats against Lena’s neck. Lena leans into the touch like she's starved for it.
“Okay,” Lena whispers, looking up at Kara warmly. There’s a streetlight to Lena’s right that casts a yellow hue on her face. Pretty.
And when Kara lets herself stare at Lena a little more before they get back to moving, she starts to get a little breathless—watching Lena’s expression—and Kara feels her heart knocking against her ribs, knowing that Lena feels the same way about her.
this time, with feelings
It turns out that Lena really meant what she said.
It’s clear in the way that Lena’s fingers move over the door knob that there's a certain urgency to her right now. She flings the door open and walks inside, Kara following close behind.
The room is mostly dark except for the soft glow of the lamp on the bedside table and the city lights outside the window.
They're no longer dancing around each other, not even close. Kara follows her pull as if one hypnotized, her throat working visibly as they finally lock gazes.
It’s almost like the breaking of a dam, need and want flooding through their veins with the force of rushing water. A month of avoidance feels like a year, and Kara can't stop thinking about how much she's missed this person. Her person. Lena.
Kara’s still kicking her shoes off rather clumsily when Lena’s mouth finds hers again, distracting Kara from her task. Lena’s mouth is so hot and wet under hers, and Kara can’t get enough of it. Of her. She wants all of Lena.
“God—I missed you so much,” Lena murmurs against Kara’s mouth.
Her hands hold Kara’s shoulders as Kara starts walking backward in the direction of Lena's bed. Kara's been here before, and she knows the way well. She lets herself be pushed, getting lost in the feeling of Lena’s mouth against hers and her touch on her body.
Even in haste, Kara and Lena know each other like the backs of their hands. Their mouths seem to know exactly where to press, where to kiss and to lick, hands mapping out familiar contours of each other’s bodies.
Kara's shaking a little, tiny shivers like she’s cold, but she’s not. Just so, so overwhelmed.
“You okay?” Lena asks, quietly, cupping Kara's face when she pulls back.
“Yes,” Kara breathes, and she means it, even if her hand trembles in Lena’s and her heart is pounding wildly in her chest. “Very okay. More than okay.”
It’s playful. Lena has that coy smile on her lips that makes Kara lose her mind. At this point she knows exactly how to press each and every one of Kara’s buttons, and she makes sure to do so. Neck kisses as she loosens her clothes, right before taking off her own shirt and bra, letting Kara stare at her for a couple of seconds before she starts kissing down her neck.
They’ve done this so often now that it comes easily, even under the dim lights.
“Your bed, now,” Kara mutters. “I want you,” she says, pushes a peck to Lena’s lips between words, “as close as possible. So sit on me, maybe.”
Now Lena laughs endearingly, dimples appearing in her cheeks and she looks so—happy that Kara’s heart just melts.
“How could I resist that,” Lena says, but then Kara is already sitting at the edge of the bed, pulling Lena in by the waist to stand between her knees.
Undressing Lena doesn’t hurt this time because this time it’s not just fucking. It’s beautiful, absolutely beautiful this time. Kara presses soft kisses on Lena’s belly as she undoes Lena’s belt, and then her pants, and pulls her closer once they’re discarded to the floor, pulls her until she’s straddling Kara's lap.
Lena’s hands find her shoulders again. Kara smiles small and warm and leans in, rubs her cheek against Lena’s, and cranes her neck up to kiss her brow bone. The crest of her cheek, the tip of her nose, the top of her cupid’s brow, her chin, the softness under it. Down her neck, to her collarbone, up to her ear, and over her cheek again. Her hand goes up and down Lena’s side, her soft skin.
She's afraid that the other would somehow disappear between her fingers because this all just feels like a wonderful dream, but the feeling of Lena on top of her plants Kara into reality.
This is Kara's reality.
Lena’s thighs slide farther apart until she’s fully seated in Kara’s lap, solid and soft against her, Lena's arousal coating Kara's pants. Kara groans quietly, holding Lena closer, one hand on the small of her back, the other running over Lena’s thigh.
Then Kara drops her head down a little, means to kiss Lena's chest but just rubs her face into it, holds Lena there with her hands on her sides, breathes in and out and feels how Lena is breathing, too.
They fall into a silence—gentle gentle gentle as their hands trace over each other’s skin. Lena wraps her arms around Kara’s middle, palms travelling firm and slow across her ribs and the expanse of her back over her sweater, feeling how she fits into Kara’s arms, feeling how her lithe body responds to Kara’s touch.
Lena fits perfectly in her arms. Perfect.
Eventually, Lena breaks the silence, tugs lightly at her sweater, and says, “You too, Kara.”
Lena lifts her arms so Kara can pull her sweater up and off, and then Lena's hands are on her skin again, down her spine and up her sides and over her collarbone, everywhere. Lena kisses her and touches her and Kara falls back against the mattress.
Their eyes meet and hold when Lena pulls back. She bites her lower lip, her fingers tracing the lines of Kara’s abdomen.
“What?” Kara asks breathlessly when she doesn't continue, eyes darting to her lips, then back up to her eyes when she feels Lena looking intently at her.
“I’m not—it’s just—this isn’t just sex for me.” A pause. “It's us. You know? It's different.” Lena hesitates, searching her gaze for something. “I'm just really in love with you.”
Kara’s chest fills with a tingling, pleasant warmth, her breath hitching as an unbridled smile blooms on her face.
“Yeah, I know. Come back here,” she says softly, tugging Lena closer and presses their mouths together. “I missed you,” Kara breathes, words muffled against Lena’s soft mouth. “Rao, I missed you so much.”
Lena melts and whimpers softly into her mouth. Kara presses her teeth into Lena’s lower lip—she loves the way it feels, the low groan that rumbles in Lena’s chest when she does it. The quietest of sounds escapes Lena, and it only serves to make Kara want to hear more—to make her feel good and loved—show her just how much she’s always wanted her.
Kara sits up, picks Lena up, and gently tosses her higher on the bed.
Lena laughs with her eyes closed, barely making a sound, flushed cherry blossom pink, that big, bright smile, and Kara is grinning too as she comes up to lie along her side, hooking her right leg over Lena’s. And Kara’s just here, like, in love, she’s completely and utterly gone and it’s only been less than an hour since the bridge.
Lena comes up and kisses her deep, moves her hand from Kara’s side to rest low on her belly. She kisses Kara’s face, and her neck, and she runs her hand over Kara’s hip, urges her left leg open to trace lines up and down the inside of her thigh.
Once they’re settled, she lifts off Lena, blinks into the dark room and turns on the red lamp. Lena smiles up at her, smiles small and prettily and familiar, and Kara has no choice but to lean down to kiss that smile, and then the tip of the nose above it.
She leans down over Lena, touching Lena’s cheekbone, just with the pads of her fingers; soft, soft. “Lena,” she whispers reverently, and her breath ghosts over Lena’s mouth. “You’re so pretty. So beautiful and so good.”
Nuzzles at Lena’s cheek until Lena brings her mouth back to hers, kisses her, lets it get deeper and more open. Lena’s fingers dig into the flesh of Kara’s back, forcing their bodies harder against each other.
“Good hands,” Kara says. “Like your hands.” She licks into Lena’s mouth, and Lena moans. “Like your mouth. Like your—mm—like your lips.”
One hand drifts over Lena’s collarbone, down the slick slope of her chest, down down down until it reaches at her breast. Kara cups, kneads, drags over the tip of Lena’s nipple, and a soft noise catches in Lena’s throat.
“Kara,” Lena says, voice deep and shaky.
“Yeah, baby?” Kara asks absently, circling a finger around one of Lena’s nipples.
“That feels good,” Lena mumbles. “Don't stop.”
Kara glances up. Lena’s got her bottom lip caught between her teeth, eyes half-closed. Her throat bobs as she swallows.
Kara sighs. “Really missed touching you, Lena.”
Lena does a full body shiver, tipping her head back as Kara’s tongue trails over her skin, moving steadily south, nipping and lightly biting down the column of her neck. And when her mouth engulfs one breast, her gaze flicks up to meet Lena’s. Lena’s eyes are fixed on hers and that makes her hum low and deep in the back of her throat. Kara laps at the hardened tip of a nipple, runs her tongue in tight circles around the edge, never once breaking eye contact.
“Fuck, Kara,” Lena says, exhaling roughly, back bowing, as if she’s trying to stuff more of herself into Kara’s mouth. Kara lets the nipple go and turns her focus to the other breast, sucking at the stiff peak until it’s as red as its twin.
And when Lena’s legs tighten around Kara, her body writhing and squirming under her, Kara comes back up to kiss her, heated—slow and deep.
The kiss slows, angles deeper and dirtier as Kara’s palms fit around Lena’s breasts. Lena moans, humid and heavy into her mouth when Kara thumbs over her nipples. It’s broken, shaky, and the sound makes heat coil in Kara’s belly.
“Kara, please, I—I need—”
“What do you want, Lena?” she asks, quiet and close.
“I want you to make me feel the way you always do,” Lena says. She touches Kara's neck, her cheek. “I want you to make me feel like I’m never going to think about anyone else other than you.”
That does it for Kara. The look in Lena’s eyes has so much weight to it.
“I want you to fuck me like you love me,” Lena says, cheeks flushing. “Fuck me until you’re all I can think about.”
Kara feels out of breath, heart leaping inside of her chest. “I do,” she says. “Rao, do I love you.”
Kara is a giver, and she’s always liked to please.
“I’m going to use my mouth, okay? You’re so good. Want to take care of you.”
“Okay,” Lena whispers. Her lips are parted, gaze hungry and stuck on Kara’s mouth. Wild, blown pupils, eyes hazy, cheeks flushed, lips slick. She looks every bit as strung out as she sounds.
Kara begins to kiss her way down Lena’s body, pausing to nip at Lena’s lower belly, down down until—
“Spread your legs for me, Lena.”
Lena complies, planting her feet further apart. Her body shakes and she moans, tossing her head back from the slick contact of Kara’s tongue. Kara traces Lena’s folds, dips low to circle her opening, ploughs up through the wetness to swipe at the swell of Lena’s clit. When she licks into Lena, Lena whimpers and squeezes her eyes shut—and something in Kara rears up a little, no no, I don't like that, and she says—
“I want to see you. Eyes on me, baby,” Kara says, voice low and hoarse, holding, placing a soft kiss on Lena’s inner thigh. “Look at me. Tell me who you look like this for.”
It’s sappy—Kara knows, and maybe too sappy for Lena. But Kara wants to see her, look into her eyes, and fall in love a little more. Fall in love with Lena more, but also fall in love with them and who they are together more.
Lena doesn't react for a second. She's breathing hard, her chest flushed in the lamplight. Then she seems to realize Kara’s stopped working her up, and she squirms a little and blinks back to reality.
“You,” Lena says, voice shaky and husky, “you, it's for you, I'm all yours, this is just for you.”
“Tell me who you're wet for,” Kara goads, kissing up the inside of Lena’s thighs, sucking and nipping at the tender skin there.
“You, always you, it's always been you, Kara—please.” Lena’s fingers dig into the sheets, her eyes half-lidded but still on Kara’s face, meeting her eyes. “Nobody else, just you, Kara, please—”
Kara gives Lena another long, smooth lick—making her girlfriend moan brokenly, hips jutting forward into the drag of her tongue. Lena’s hands fly to Kara’s head, her fingers tightening in Kara’s hair.
It has Kara smothering a smile.
“Yes, yes, Kara, more,” Lena chants.
Kara goes slow, licks up the length of Lena’s slit, the salty-sweet tang of Lena. Swirling around the swell of Lena’s clit, enjoying and loving the tremble of Lena’s body, the choked out, “Oh, god, fuck” as she explores, the way Lena deeply shudders and curses again when Kara pushes inside her.
Lena’s so wet, sopping really, and she soaks Kara’s face and chin with slick arousal. And, Rao, nothing could've prepared her for the reality of touching Lena like this again. Kara groans quietly at how good it feels. She fucks Lena with her mouth, thumb on her clit, as slick arousal runs down her chin, her ears overflowing with Lena’s whimpers and hisses of pleasure.
“Oh,” Lena breathes, and bucks and squirms, fingers twisting in Kara’s hair, “oh, god, Kara. Kara—”
Kara finds it difficult to breathe. It’s been so long since they’ve done this and Kara has every inch of Lena’s body memorized but somehow, it still feels new.
It feels new even though it’s not, Lena’s skin feels softer underneath Kara’s fingertips. The way Lena’s breaths gradually become louder, the way Kara’s heard her moan and call her name so many times and yet she almost blacks out when she hears it again.
Kara presses Lena’s restless hips to the mattress, revelling in every shaky moan and curse of encouragement. She sinks her tongue deep into Lena. Curls, strokes against fluttering walls, dragging as much of Lena’s arousal into her mouth as she can.
And Rao, it’s so nice and satisfying to hear Lena get breathier and breathier, all because of her. Kara watches the expanse of Lena’s body, the twitch of abdominal muscles, flushed skin, the rapid rise and fall of her chest. Hands no longer in Kara’s hair—one arm flung above her head, a white-knuckle grip on the pillow. Her other hand clutches at her own breast, fingers circling one nipple languidly, and it makes Kara wish her mouth could be two places at once.
Lena keeps her eyes on her, too, dark lashes, heavy, so, so pretty.
Kara doesn’t stop; she keeps her pace even though her jaw’s aching, fucking into Lena until—until Lena shakes, thighs quivering on either side of Kara’s shoulders and comes with a strangled gasp—a sticky writhing mess pressed tight to Kara’s face, shuddering and stilling for a long moment.
Kara leaves her tongue, heavy and wet, on Lena’s clit until she comes down from it. Breathes out that little sigh of satisfaction. She leaves a soft kiss against the inside of Lena’s thigh before cleaning her face using the sheets.
It’s quiet; gentle silence settling on them. Kara rests her chin and hands on Lena’s lower belly.
When Lena’s panting turns to soft exhales and her body completely softens—relaxes, Kara chooses that moment to come up to press a soft kiss on Lena’s neck and start stroking her clit again slowly, softly.
“Darling,” Lena says quietly, reaches out to trace Kara’s jaw with her fingertips. She slides her hand across Kara’s jaw and around her neck to pull her into a soft, searching kiss.
Kara lets herself be kissed—her lips pried gently apart by Lena. Lena tastes herself in Kara’s mouth as Kara coaxes her into another orgasm.
“Want you to come for me again, baby,” Kara whispers, and tips their foreheads together. “You look so pretty when you come. Wanna keep making you feel good.”
“But I want to touch you, too,” Lena says, just as quiet. She licks her lips—she looks so much less composed now, and Kara feels a sudden rush of pride knowing it's all her doing.
“You can, if you stay good for me. Can you do that?”
Lena bites her bottom lip and nods, tugs Kara closer and buries her face in Kara’s neck. Two fingers swipes over Lena’s clit. Circling, pressing, rubbing, as Lena lets out soft moans and whimpers. Kara slides a finger in, and Lena trembles, wraps an arm around Kara’s shoulder. When Kara adds the second, Lena releases a ragged moan against her neck, nails trailing fire on Kara’s back.
“Now. It’s been a while, hasn’t it, Lena?” Kara murmurs, kissing from the centre of Lena’s forehead to her temple. Her hand nudges against Lena's bottom lip, coaxing Lena into opening her mouth. Lena's jaw goes slack, letting the side of Kara's hand slot between her teeth.
As her only warning, Kara tells her, “Bite.”
And Lena does, uncertain at first, but then with force and a string of moans to follow when Kara adds another finger and pushes into her. One firm thrust, all the way in, until she's knuckle deep and satisfied.
“Breathe. Eyes closed,” Kara coaches, as she pushes into her, slow and deep and hard. Lena’s teeth sink into her skin, leaving reddened indents. She can feel the vibration of Lena’s low-pitched moans in her knuckles and wrist. “Breathe. Don’t think, just breathe.”
Lena is quick to adjust. She quiets herself around Kara’s hand, but the soft whimpers continue to spill from her lips. Her eyelashes, long and pretty, fan out over her high cheekbones. Her eyes squeeze shut whenever Kara pushes in, the wrinkles on her forehead begin to smooth out with each stroke into her, calming.
“That’s it, baby,” Kara praises, tipping her head to mouth at Lena’s neck again. Finally, she removes her dampened hand from Lena’s mouth, and says, “You’re being so good, Lena. Stay good for me.”
Within no time, Lena’s legs are shaking. “Kara,” Lena breathes. “Oh, god. Fuck—”
Just like she missed every aspect of her relationship with Lena while they were apart, Kara missed this. She missed the closeness she feels right then, the intimacy. She feels the tightness and warmth of Lena around her. She loves the feeling of Lena’s warm, sweaty skin against her own. She loves being in between her parted legs, inside of her.
Kara’s fingers thrust hard and fast and everywhere inside of Lena, filling her from every angle and beyond every capacity. Lena stretches and pulses and shudders, and she comes and Kara keeps going, shoving her into a deeper, wetter, third orgasm, with Lena clenching and shaking around her.
“Feel so full,” Lena whines, crying out as she curls her whole body up into Kara’s. “Feels so good, feels like… fuck, can you please go faster, I need—”
Kara’s always done everything Lena asked of her, and this time is no different. She increases the rhythm and force behind her thrusts, her fingers sinking into Lena with every stroke.
“You’re so beautiful, Lena,” Kara tells her softly, looking down at her, her voice hoarse. “So beautiful. So perfect.”
The tender words are at a sharp contrast to the fast and unapologetic way she’s fucking her, but it seems to be exactly what Lena wanted to hear.
“Kara,” Lena whimpers, her heels digging into the mattress so hard Kara can feel it dip a little. She sounds like she’s close to tears. “Kara, Kara, I—”
Her come is so warm and wet, dripping all over Kara’s fingers, and Kara can't even think; she just fucks Lena through her orgasm, muffling her moans, sinking her teeth into Kara’s shoulder. Kara doesn’t mind the pain—in fact she welcomes it. Lena is trembling, gasping, little oh-oh sounds, her entire body tense and then: languid, helpless, soft against Kara’s body.
“Remember to breathe, baby.”
Lena draws in a shaky breath.
“Now one more,” Kara coaxes, tucking messy stray locks of hair behind Lena’s ear and kisses her neck just behind her ear. “Mm, that’s a good girl,” she praises, and Lena groans quietly.
Lena’s face is beautiful and wrecked. Her eyes are deep pools of darkness and her cheeks are stained pink and every time Kara pushes back into her, her eyebrows squish together and her lips push into a pout and a muffled whimper escapes from the back of her throat.
“Kara, love. Please,” Lena says hoarsely. It’s like a plea, like she’s asking for help, like she’s making sure Kara is there, that she’s going to take care of her.
“You’re okay,” she soothes, nudging her nose with Lena’s. She touches Lena’s face and offers another soft peck and Lena’s lips part, her tongue catching on Lena’s upper lip. “I got you. I'll take care of you always, sweetheart,” she promises.
Kara keeps moving her aching fingers, keeps moving her mouth over Lena’s neck. She tastes so good and Kara feels crazy, like she could never get enough of this, could never get enough of making Lena act this way, making Lena feel this way.
“You mean so much to me, I love you so much, baby—” Kara whispers against Lena’s mouth, and—fuck, fuck, her girlfriend moans so so sweetly that Kara just melts and falls in love a little more, almost comes from the sound—just how can someone sound so hot and cute at the same time? Rao.
“Yes,” Lena says. Her hand grips at the pillow under her head, back arching prettily. “Yes, yes, yes.”
It feels so good feeling Lena around her, feeling Lena’s lips against hers, but Kara is greedy and her heart is beating so fast, body aching for Lena despite Lena being right there. She keeps her fingers going until Lena comes again with a shaky, broken moan, hiding her face in Kara’s trembling shoulder.
Lena stops Kara’s hand, too sensitive.
Satisfied with her work, she brings her fingers to her lips to taste the come, warmth and salt and musk.
“Darling,” Lena slurs, and Kara realizes that Lena is watching her; that Lena saw her lick the come off her fingers. “You're—unbelievable, oh my god.”
“Tastes like you,” Kara says, wiggling her eyebrows, and laughs when Lena smiles that flustered, shy kind of smile, and slaps weakly at her shoulder.
Lena’s breath is all over the place. Kara grab hers wrist—her pulse is all over the place too.
She grins down at Lena’s messy hair, her heavy-lidded eyes, her flushed, sweaty skin, the trail of bruises and bite marks. Lena looks blissful and thoroughly fucked and beautiful. Kara made Lena look that way. A warm pang of something delicious spikes through her.
Lena covers her eyes with her arm, recovering.
Reaching the bedside drawer, Kara grabs a bottle of water and chugs down the content. Lena makes a quiet sound behind her. Then another one, which sounds like a sniff—
“Did you say somethi—” Kara stops and turns. “Lena. Oh, no, sweetheart—are you crying? Baby, are you okay?” She sets aside the bottle, cups Lena’s face.
Lena whimpers and leans into the hands smoothing her hair from her forehead. “I’m baby?”
“Sorry. I’m—I’m a mess—I’m just a little…” Lena’s voice trembles when she speaks. She shakes her head, wipes under her eyes, and gives a small, watery laugh.
Kara’s heart lurches at the sight of the wet tracks on high cheekbones, the teardrops that cling to Lena’s dark lashes. She offers Lena a small smile.
“Made you cry,” Kara murmurs. She wipes the moisture from Lena’s cheeks, lets her thumb skate across Lena’s bottom lip. Rubs the side of Lena’s nose with the tip of her own, and then their eyes catch and hold. The sheen of tears makes the green and blue of Lena’s eyes all the more vibrant.
Lena looks at her for a long, weighted moment.
Her eyes widen then, just a little. “You still haven’t…” she trails off, and starts moving—
“Relax,” Kara says, and touches Lena’s shoulder, thumb lightly rubbing her neck, and keeps her there.
Lena looks completely spent and exhausted. Her eyelids are heavy and her hair is a disaster and she’s covered in sweat and saliva and come.
But she looks up at Kara and furrows her brow. “Wanted to touch you. You need to come,” she says, touching Kara’s hand on her shoulder.
She isn’t wrong. It actually really does hurt.
“I’ll do it,” Kara tells her. “Let me clean you up and tuck you in. I’ll take care of myself later.”
“It’s okay. You can make it up to me next time.” She wipes Lena’s face, her neck, her shoulder—cleans her up, then Kara scoots closer until they’re sharing the same pillow. She buries her fingers in Lena’s dishevelled hair, gently kneading the back of her head. Just the way Lena likes.
Lena closes her eyes and lets out a soft sigh.
“You tired me out,” she says quietly, nose scrunching up.
Kara’s smile softens. She rakes her fingers through Lena’s hair, runs her foot back and forth between Lena’s ankles. Lena makes a pleased noise, and Kara sighs in relief. She knows Lena won’t be entirely coherent for a while.
“You’re so good to me,” Lena murmurs. She looks like she wants to say more, but seems too tired to do anything more.
“You’re so good to me, too,” Kara says back, quietly, and brings the blanket up to their shoulders. She cups Lena’s cheek, then tucks a loose strand of hair behind Lena’s ear.
A silence settles, stretching for what could be minutes, and Kara begins to wonder if Lena has fallen asleep.
Exhaling softly, Kara closes her eyes. Seconds pass, and then something soft touches her mouth. Lena mouths a silent “I love you” against her lips. Hears a slight hitch, the whispered, barely audible “Kara” before Lena shifts a little, snuggles into Kara.
It's the softest and sweetest kiss of the night. As quiet as the world and as gentle as the feelings coating Kara’s insides.
Kara wakes up slowly and is still in that half-asleep, half-awake state; that position that’s somehow in-between. She first remembers, like she always does, what happened before she passed out. She remembers skin on skin and her sore hand and Lena’s pleading. She remembers the satisfaction mixing with the pleasure and the heat and the love, deep inside her belly.
And maybe because she’s familiar with the feeling and her body and brain are on autopilot, that sense of loneliness and disappointment starts to register in her head, seeping in underneath the warm head rush. That's how it always goes. She remembers that it happened, and that it was incredible, but that she was alone afterwards, and she’s alone now, pretending that she isn't in love with her best friend.
But the thing is, she isn’t alone this time. Kara is not alone at all and she no longer has to hide her feelings. She didn’t fall asleep curled into herself on the bed, caught somewhere between joy and hurt. She fell asleep curled into Lena’s warm skin and soft hair and gentle breathing.
As she starts to remember, she still isn't awake, but when she shifts her body it feels real. Lena is solid and present as Kara leans into her, burying her nose into the space beneath the nape of Lena's neck. She breathes her in and sighs—it feels good and right, so Kara leans into it even more. She pulls Lena even closer, nuzzles into the back of her head, Lena’s back snug against her front. Kara’s hand is cupped around something soft and round and squishy, and when her fingers twitch, purely reflex, Lena makes a soft, quiet noise.
Lena’s breathing is slow but she’s not asleep. Kara knows, with careful intimacy, what Lena sounds like when she is asleep.
A warm hand worms its way up to the hand Kara forgot to remove from Lena’s breast, fingers entangling for a moment before she feels her turning around to face her.
Kara’s woken up with Lena so many times before, but this time feels different. Her heart feels so full. It’s not just because it’s been a long time, but because it feels like the very first time somehow.
“Good morning,” Lena says. Her voice is gravelly, smoky. Kara feels it vibrate through her.
Their eyes meet, lock in, and Lena blinks like she’s taking everything in. The early morning sunlight catches Lena’s hair, the glow of her skin, the soft curve of her smile. What happens then could be likened to stepping into a warm light, or the spring arriving, or whatever the general consensus of the most beautiful thing in the world is. It starts with her eyes, her heterochromatic eyes, the lovely green and blue, vast and soft and gorgeous, the smile which then reaches her mouth, grows there like a flower in fast-forward, lights up her whole face, her eyes literally, and Kara does mean literally, outshining all the stars in the universe.
Kara can only just stare, in awe, in love, think, wow, and name it the eighth wonder of the world in her head.
“Good morning,” Kara replies, entranced.
Lena rubs her eyes and stretches under the blanket big and wide, spread hawk, then goes tiny tiny tiny like a cat, curling into Kara. She falls into Kara’s chest, and Kara is quick to wrap her arms around her shoulders. She smells good. Like Lena. But also like Lena and Kara—them.
Lena makes a content sigh. Kara thinks that if Lena were a cat she’d be purring right now.
“I could get used to this,” Lena says.
It’s whispery and soft, her voice crackled with the last remnants of sleep. She says it right next to Kara’s ear and then places the softest little kiss behind it. Their hearts hammering against each other disjointedly, and Kara breathes unevenly; thinks how achingly intimate this is and feels like her heart could burst.
Lena raises her head, props herself up on her forearms; they look at each other, and the words are stuck in Kara’s mouth, underneath her tongue. Lena looks at her, and for a moment Kara feels like they share the same thought; feels like everything’s there on her face to be read like an open book, feels like she’s reading the same thing off Lena’s.
In the end, neither of them says it. Lena smiles, shy and sweet, then dips her head down, kisses Kara, tentative, slow, aching. Kara keeps her eyes half open.
Lena pulls back.
“Can I appreciate you now?” she asks.
“Um… yes?” Kara is still kind of half asleep and doesn’t know what Lena is talking about.
And then Lena grins, bright and wicked, and places a finger over her lips, indicating for Kara to be quiet, and she dives under the covers and puts her mouth on Kara’s neck, and then down down down—
Good morning indeed.
Unfortunately, Kara doesn’t get to shower and eat breakfast with Lena, because as soon as she opens the bathroom door she gets called for an emergency.
It’s nothing big. Just a fire breaking out in the city, that takes Kara a little over twenty minutes to wipe out and make sure everyone in the area is safe. When she gets back, she sees Lena before Lena sees her, in the kitchen setting her cup of tea down.
Lena’s dressed in her customary wine red three piece suit, neat and sleek, and her hair is tied into a ponytail. She’s wearing black high heels, and Kara thinks, wow, they're ridiculously high. With each step she makes, it cracks against the floor like a whip.
Lena looks sharp and beautiful and like starlight, and Kara almost trips on air as she makes her way towards her.
“I want to hug you so bad, but I haven’t had a shower and I just spent twenty minutes putting out fire. I stink.” Kara scrunches her nose as she sits on the stool behind the counter.
Lena laughs and pushes the plate full of pancakes towards Kara. “This is something I’m going to have to get used to, hm? You having to run off at any given moment,” she says lightly with amusement in her eyes. As Lena checks the time on her watch, Kara takes a bite of her pancake. “Oh, no. I have to go. Early meeting.”
“Remember the times when we kept telling each other how we'd be too busy for relationships.” Kara's eyes soften as Lena walks towards her, moving effortlessly in her high heels. “That our lives are too abnormal for such things. But look at us.”
“That’s right.” Lena hums, head tilting a little. She pauses. “This isn’t anything new to us—we don’t have to get used to anything. We’ve always been like this… we always made things work.”
It’s true, and Kara really does feel embarrassed, cringing inwardly as she recalls everything she’s said to Lena in the past.
“All this time, we’ve been saying things when our actions have been completely opposite.” Kara chuckles and looks down at her lap, scratching her cheek. “It’s just, looking back—all the things I’ve said? Thinking about it makes me feel silly.”
“I’ve said things, too,” Lena whispers.
Kara looks up when Lena takes her hand into hers, thumb brushing her knuckle.
“I’ve said things, deflected and dodged questions,” Lena continues. “I was scared of saying too much, scared of ruining things and somehow being faced with rejection.”
Kara lets out a shaky breath. If one of them had taken the first step they could have avoided all the pain.
They’re not perfect. Kara is scared, too, and Lena is maybe too much of a martyr; she’ll put Kara's comfort and security before anything, even herself, and if Kara isn’t careful she’ll end up letting her. That nearly happened yesterday. That nearly took all this away.
Lena is it for her. She wants her forever. So starting today, she’s going to be brave.
“Unbelievable,” Kara says.
“We are unbelievable,” Lena says, dimples peeking out around her grin. “I can’t believe we danced around each other for so long and neither of us said anything.”
Kara groans. “Fools,” she agrees.
That pulls a smirk out of Lena. It softens a touch when Kara flushes. “I’m honestly embarrassed, too, so I try not to think about it. In the end you got the girl, and that’s what’s important.”
“You got the girl, too,” Kara says. “You beat me to confessing first…”
Lena’s eyes are crescented and smile stretched and shaped in a way that doesn’t turn up like most smiles do. The smile turns into a gentle tug of her bottom lip, a shyness peeking through. There’s that softness in her eyes—a side of her few see. A side tucked away for more intimate moments like this.
It’s intimate by the way the atmosphere stills for them, the way Kara’s heart beats in her chest despite everything else around them slowing down.
She loves Lena. She’s known that for years.
She’s in love with Lena, too. She’s only known that for a few months.
Her heart beat and the back and forth of the gentle waves are the only constants and it’s the calmest she’s felt in months.
Lena suddenly freezes and checks her time again. “I have to go now, darling.”
“Okay, go kick some butt. I’ll see you after work?” Kara smiles impossibly soft when she hears Lena’s heartbeat pick up its pace.
“After work,” Lena echoes softly. She nods. “Yeah.”
Before Lena turns to leave, Kara reaches for Lena’s hand, stopping her best friend from leaving. Instead of going for a hug, she cups the side of Lena’s face and presses a soft kiss to Lena’s lips. Squeezes her shoulder, and then pulls back.
“Okay,” Kara murmurs. Her chest seems to dip in, all the air leaving her lungs, and the smile that blooms over her face is brilliant. “You can go now.”
Lena blinks slow, and then, very quietly chuckles—her smile turning quizzical as she looks at Kara’s face.
“Why do you look like that?”
“It’s just, remember all those times when we’d accidentally kiss each other on the mouth instead of our cheeks?” Kara can't stop smiling as thinks about it. “Wow, we’re actually unintentionally really funny.”
“I—Kara, please.” Lena’s cheeks turn pink, and Kara beams at it. “No more recalling embarrassing things.”
“No more accidental kisses. Only intentional girlfriend kisses,” Kara says, grinning lazily, and leans in again, giving one pink cheeked Luthor a final kiss before they part ways.
Kara Danvers isn’t nervous.
She had another amazing morning with Lena, making out in the bed, in the shower, in the kitchen, and then in the car. They also had a great time scrolling through silly posts and videos together and spamming the group chat consisting of Alex, Kelly, Nia, Brainy, and Winn. In Lena’s car, they jammed to N’Sync and Taylor Swift, and they held hands. They also sent a photo of them pulling happy and funny faces along with a caption that only said ‘hey, guess what’ to Alex, and before Alex could even reply, they immediately warned her to keep it hush hush with her life at least until tonight, otherwise they’d paint flowers on her treasured motorbike.
Alex, after a hurricane of text messages of what??, is this real life, you’re not joking right, oh my god, tells Kara and Lena she can definitely do that, but she can't guarantee it won't spill out of her mouth with Kelly.
There are already people inside Alex’s apartment—there is chatter, glasses clinking, and music playing in the background.
Good. That's—really good.
They’re about to find out, and Kara is pretty sure it’s going to be hilarious; she is also not nervous about this—
“Oh hey, Lena is here!” Kelly exclaims, excitedly waving her hand at someone behind Kara, and Kara’s heart does a weird pirouette. It pounds against her chest, probably beating twice the normal speed. Her cheeks heat up, and so do her ears, and she repeatedly tells herself it must be the wine.
Okay, so maybe she is a little nervous after all. Kara touches her glasses, shifts a little.
“Hey, guys,” Lena says once she’s in the room. Kara keeps a straight face, tries to seem nonchalant because that was their plan, but she can’t help but freeze in surprise when Lena’s hand lands on her forearm and squeezes it. Her hand travels up, and her thumb does a little fucking move, stroking Kara’s neck. “Sorry I’m a little late—I got stuck in traffic and I had to find parking around the other block. How are you, Kara?”
“Lena, hey,” Kara starts, smiling as she turns to face Lena. She brings her own hand over to the one Lena placed on her shoulder, squeezes it, and after that, Lena leans in to greet her with a kiss on the lips, just like they said they would do.
Kara means to keep it a short and sweet kiss, like a natural greeting between lovers, but then she gets a little too into it, and she cups Lena’s cheek with her other hand as she kisses her for a moment too long.
It's light and doesn’t go on long enough that it’s impolite, though. Lena rubs Kara's neck (which is turning a light shade of red), and she smiles at Kara as she pulls back.
The chatter has stopped, and so has the music playing in the background. The silence in the living room is deafening—Kara doesn’t even have to look around to know that everyone (except Alex and maybe Nia, too) has their jaw on the floor, eyes bulging.
“Sorry,” Kara apologizes with a shy smile, and Lena waves a hand dismissively at her as Kara scoots over to make room for her.
“It’s okay. Did you just get here?”
“Yeah! How was your day? Got to spend time in the lab?”
“Yes, but time went by too fast, so I found myself buried in meetings towards the end of the day. Made a lot of progress, too, with that prototype I was talking about earlier. How about you?” Lena asks her, and Kara can’t help but be impressed by her acting. She's a natural. The pretty dusting of pink high on her cheeks are the only giveaway.
“Aw, really? That's great! Ugh, my day was boring,” she says, looking at Lena as she takes her hand over her thigh. Kara knows that Lena always runs cold, and it’s a chilly evening, so she squeezes it, hoping the gesture will warm her up if only a little. No one's said a thing yet, and it’s just as funny as it is worrisome, but she goes on like no one's losing their minds. “I mean, it was kind of weird and super quiet today. At CatCo, you know it's always busy, but today was—“
“—wait a damn minute, hold up,” someone blurts, his voice loud and panicky through Kara’s lame small talk and Lena’s laughter. It’s Winn, who is sitting with Kelly and Alex on the other couch, just on their right side.
Kara looks at them and she can barely contain her smile and laughter. Brainy looks hilarious, frozen stiff with his eyes wider than they have ever been. Kelly is leaning forward on her seat, as if she can't believe what's happening right in front of her, and Winn only blinks and blinks, looking like he's still trying to process. Nia opens a packet of chips, and it makes a loud crackling noise. She makes an oh, shit, that came off too loud look.
“Am I going mad, or—or did you guys—did you kiss? You saw it?” Winn asks Alex, but then he turns to the others. “Guys, they kissed, right? On the lips? Tell me you saw it too—”
“No, no, I saw it too, Winn,” Brainy says, and he hasn't stopped looking at Kara and Lena, eyes moving back and forth rapidly.
“Okay, cool, cool, cool.” Winn nods his head, his brow furrowed, and Kara swears that she can see the gears in his brain turning. And then: “Wait. I mean—are you guys just back to sleeping with each other, or... you know, are you guys together together?”
Brainy squints at him, and then at Kara and Lena. “Together together?”
Kara grins excitedly.
“Oh? Wow, holy shit. I—Finally,” Winn says, recovering his speech with a grin. In fact, he looks borderline smug, like he got it all figured out in seconds. Nia goes ’oh snap’ next to him. “Like, let me just ignore the past four-ish years and talk about the past month. The breakup? Seeing you two being so awkward with each other, tiptoeing around, like. Those were dark times, I tell you. Dark times!”
Brainy looks like he’s thinking hard.
“What is it, Brainy? You've never noticed how Lena looks at Kara?” Alex says, wrinkling her nose.
“No, I'm not that lost, Alex, but—what? How does Lena look at Kara?”
“Like she wants to, I don’t know. Eat her alive? And then cuddle her afterwards?” she shrugs. “They're kind of weird like that.”
Kara blinks fast, flushing. Lena's fast heartbeat reaches her ears.
“I have no idea what that even looks like,” Brainy says.
Kelly practically squeals. “We can finally go on double dates!”
“—hold up, hold up, you knew about this?” Winn turns to look at Alex, looking and sounding like he got betrayed in the worst possible way.
Alex just shrugs, twirling her beer in her hand.
“Why do you look so surprised? I’m her sister,” she says smugly. “And that's a big yes to the double dates, Kelly!”
“Don’t listen to her, we only told her a few hours ago,” Lena mentions, smirking.
“I always knew you had the hots for my sister, but geez.” Alex huffs loudly—it took you this long, Luthor, this fucking long—and throws a cushion at Lena. Lena catches it easily.
Kara snickers at that, not as embarrassed as she is amused by the chaos. Lena squeezes her arm and moves closer so she can lean her head on her shoulder, comfortably, like she belongs there.
“Alright, that's enough!” Nia clasps her hands together, a wicked grin on her face. “Now that everyone finally knows, it's time for all the losers to pay up. I want it all by cash, thank you.”
Winn literally screams, and it startles Brainy. “Don't tell me, are you talking about—? Holy crap, Nia. Come on, that bet is like, five years old?”
“Okay, and? This bet doesn’t have an expiry date,” Nia quips.
Alex has a grim look on her face and she looks down at her trembling hands, quietly cursing a fuck under her breath.
“A bet.” Kara balks. “Wait, you guys bet on our relationship? Nia!”
“Hey, I’m not the person who started it. Look at the miserable one over there with her hands in her hair, rethinking her life decisions.”
Kara yelps. “Alex started it?!”
“But seriously, Kara, Lena, I’m happy for you two.” Nia’s smile is warm and genuine, but there’s a glint in her eye. “It’s been a long time coming—and, hey, don’t look at me like that, Alex. You were the one who started it. You, Winn, and Sam are the OG members.”
Alex sighs. “I love you, Kara and Lena—I’m truly happy for you guys. We all are. But god,” she mutters, half-smiling, half-wincing. “I had forgotten about that bet. Fuuuck, I don't know what to do with myself.”
“Hold on a moment,” Brainy says, calmly standing up. “Nia, you probably saw this coming. This is cheating. You—you have the power of precognition.”
“No, I really didn’t see it coming,” Nia tells him with a grin. “I placed my bets way before I got to learn how to use my powers.”
Brainy bites his bottom lip, shooting Nia a skeptical look.
“Aw, lighten up. Just because you didn’t see this coming, considering you’re from the future.”
Winn wheezes at that, while Brainy just deflates with a cute frown on his face.
Nia smiles, pats him on the head. “Anyway, Winn and Sam guessed it’d take Kara and Lena less than two years,” she explains smoothly, earning a grumpy glare from Winn. “Alex, Brainy, and Kelly, three. I’m the only one who said four and over.”
And with that, Nia hastily clicks her fingers at the groaning losers’ way, making sure they don’t forget to hand those bills later.
“Alex,” Kelly mutters, sighing. “Call Sam.”
“Fuck,” Alex says, and pulls her phone out of her pocket. “Sam, hey? Guess what...”
“Well, I want to die,” Lena says.
“A betting pool,” Kara mumbles, disbelieving. She makes a quick, terrified eye contact with Lena, who looks like she wants to melt into the floor, then lets her head droop, shooting angry puppy eyes in the instigator’s (Alex) direction. “It’s... okay. This is fine. They would’ve found out... either way.”
“Oh my god,” Lena says, smushing her face into Kara’s shoulder. She starts laughing weakly, despite herself, and Kara joins in a moment later.
Maybe it was obvious—them ending up together.
Maybe it had always been obvious, but Kara had always been too comfortable with their friendship to see it. Rao.
It’s a little later when everything starts to quiet.
Right now, in the dim light of the TV, with everyone curled in the faded couches, are really some of the happiest times, Kara thinks. Alex, Kelly, and Winn are shoved together onto the couch, Winn’s arms clutched protectively over the popcorn that is ten light years away from Kara because as Winn puts it: “You guys are going to be gross anyways. We’re lonely so we’re keeping the popcorn.”
“Hey, I have a girlfriend.” Alex had huffed but that’s beside the point, making Kelly laugh.
On the other smaller couch, Nia snores softly, long fallen asleep after ten minutes of the movie, head lolling onto Brainy’s shoulder; while Brainy’s eyes are glued to the TV, making slight, excited jerks when something happens. Their legs are a tangle of limbs. You wouldn’t know where one started and which one ended.
Then there’s Kara and Lena. Lena’s not watching the movie, Kara can see her watching her out of the corner of her eyes. Eyes curved into slight crescents.
“Hey,” Kara says, chest warm, warm, warm.
“Hi,” Lena replies, voice gentle. She turns to grin at her, yawns a little, then leans in to tuck her face in Kara’s neck. Kara cups her cheek, strokes it.
“Stop being gross!” Winn says around a gigantic mouthful of popcorn.
Kara merely pokes her tongue at Winn before reaching down to tangle their fingers in a mess that was theirs.
“Sleepy?” Kara asks quietly.
“A little,” Lena says, just as quietly. “Just a little tired.”
Kara bites her bottom lip. “Lena Luthor,” she says, so softly, so carefully, almost choking on it. Clears her throat, then asks, “Do you think Winn is right?”
“That we’re disgusting?”
“Okay, you can let me out, guys. I promise I’m civil. The most peaceful person.”
“You tried to jump Nia just two minutes ago,” Kelly says, slipping the doorknob she removed from the inside of the bathroom door into her pocket. “Winn, I promise you this is for your safety.”
“Yeah, I know, Nia needs all the safety she can get,” Winn grumbles on the other side of the door. “I get it.”
“I meant your safety,” Kelly says. “Nia would kick your ass, let’s be honest here.”
“Kelly, I have gadgets, resilience, and sharp nails,” Winn huffs. Kara, standing next to Lena, makes a face.
“Winn.” Lena makes a pained sound. “You don't cut your nails?”
Winn groans, ignoring Lena. “I’d claw my way out of here if it wasn’t for Alex's painting on the door. I can’t ruin this pretty masterpiece. You should thank Alex for your life, Nia.”
Everyone turns to Nia, who’s sitting on the couch and eating popcorn, looking extremely cozy and completely unbothered.
“Thank you, Alex,” Nia says.
“No problem,” Alex says. She blinks, still trying to figure out what the fuck is happening.
“Alright. Will you promise not to fight if I let you out?”
“Kelly, my fight is not with you,” Winn says solemnly.
“Try again,” Kelly says drily.
“Okay, fine,” Winn moans, “I won’t fight. Probably. Maybe.”
Brainy leans over to Nia, munching on popcorn. “Why is he being like this? All you did was win against him in pictionary.”
Nia smirks. “I maybe used my powers to win, too. If you saw how everything happened, well—his reaction is understandable. Plus, he had some Four Loko.”
“Winn, look at the painting on the door, maybe it’ll calm you down,” Kara suggests.
“It’s the one with the huge thunder, that might not help,” Lena remarks, drumming her fingers against her hips. “Kara, Kelly, we locked him into the wrong bathroom.”
Eventually, Kelly lets Winn out of the bathroom and the latter spends a good portion of the evening glaring at Nia and muttering under his breath, even when they squeeze around the kitchen table to eat.
“You're such a baby,” Nia says drily, and before Winn opens his mouth, she says, “Let me apologize. I’ll buy you food for a week—anything you want off the Noonan’s menu.”
Winn glares at her for a couple of seconds, biting his bottom lip, thinking about it.
Alex just shakes her head and sighs, looping an arm around Kelly’s neck.
“What the hell, guys. You’re all adults,” Alex says. “This is supposed to be a bonding activity.”
Generally, this is how one of Kara’s days goes: she drags herself up early enough to watch the sun touch the edge of sky, gentle pink unfurling over the world as she grumbles and bangs around and tries to wake all the way up; she breathes deep and meets Lena by the street side bus stop and they go for coffee (they take turns bringing each other muffins and sweets, sticky and crumbly and delicious); she goes to work, has a decent time, switches to her suit and goes patrolling; she crashes Lena’s office hours, makes her laugh and goads her into drinking water and eating some snacks; they walk under the evening sky together, too; later, at night, she confesses her secret shames, all the biting bits of her day that are hard to talk about anywhere other than under the covers; Lena does the same.
And so, as they say, it goes. All the touches turn into something closer to casual domesticity; eventually, Lena stops texting to ask if they’re going to meet up—they just do.
Being with Lena has always felt easy, has always been comfortable. With Lena, Kara isn't just a superpowered alien; she isn't a public figure or the upbeat, positive presence in every group of friends. She doesn't have to be brave or strong or funny or cautious. With Lena, Kara is simply herself; no airs and graces, no pretence.
Being with Lena is late night conversations and belly-aching laughter. It's the steady, rapid beating of her pulse against her chest and fingertips as Lena and Kara lie down side by side and listen to music through a shared pair of earphones. It's binge-eating their favourite snacks and slacking off of work to giggle into each other's shoulders without any guilt or remorse. It's gentle breezes and silver-blue moonlight that paints their skins copper under the streetlights as they walk to the convenience store and back at two in the morning, talking about everything and nothing.
Currently, Kara has her hands folded over her belly, the sweet aftertaste of uninhibited laughter still sitting on her tongue long after the two of them have gone quiet. Lena’s breathing is shallow and slow, a sure sign that she's drifting somewhere between the realms of sleep and wakefulness.
They’re both sat on the carpeted floor, their backs leaning against the couch.
It's a calm moment, quiet contentment blanketing them warmly despite the December chill.
Depending on the season and the hour of the night, the different phases of the moon tended to bathe them in different shades of orange and blue. Tonight, the moon is full, and the light that scatters over Lena’s pretty features is a greyish blue.
Shifting a little, Kara turns to look down at Lena, a fond smile playing over her lips. She lets a few moments pass by in silence, gaze traveling down her girlfriend's features and over her closed eyes. Long, long lashes dust over the highs of Lena's cheekbones, and Kara's eyes follow them further down to her nose, and to the prominent cupid's bow of her lips; Kara's eyes trace over everything that makes Lena irresistible.
“Lena,” she calls out softly, pulling Lena from her sleep induced haze. “Wake up, pretty.”
Immediately, Lena’s lips curve down into a pout, the bridge of her nose scrunching up a little. She whines softly and Kara chuckles, leaning in and pressing her mouth to the soft curve of Lena's cheek.
“‘Time is it,” Lena asks, still not opening her eyes. Her hand finds Kara’s shoulder, finger stilling there, a small frown appearing on her face as she keeps her fingerpad pressed steadily against Kara’s skin. It's a constant, Kara thinks, a physical reminder that Lena is there with her; not that she needs one, but it's their thing.
They like to touch. And it's not anything sexual or possessive, not at all. But when they're together, they like to touch each other. Kara likes to have her hand on Lena’s thigh, Lena likes to run her fingertips over Kara’s forearm. Lena’s presence alone is enough to make Kara feel at ease, but her touch is a constant reminder that she's there, and that she's hers.
“Late. You can’t sleep on the floor. Even with me as your pillow, you’ll wake up with a sore back.”
Lena only makes a quiet noise, ‘m too sleepy and I’m comfortable like this, and just tucks her face into Kara’s neck.
“You always smell so good,” Lena murmurs helplessly, unmoving.
“Lena,” Kara tries again. She nuzzles her nose against Lena’s temple, pulls back, then tucks a loose strand of hair behind Lena’s ear. “Babe…”
Suddenly, Kara hears the sound of Lena’s heart picking up pace.
Lena shifts in Kara’s arms, looks up at Kara, a light red high on her cheeks. “Carry me to bed?” she whispers, and then Kara shakes her head with a fond smile before scooping Lena up.
The apartment building is quiet when Kara closes the door, locking it. With her personal laptop in hand, she starts walking towards the elevator.
“Kara! Sweetie, hey,” a deep, gentle voice calls out behind her. Kara turns around, and immediately, her face softens at the sight.
“Ah, if it isn’t my favourite neighbour,” Kara says, and the older woman chuckles, giving her a hand wave in the air. She carries a box of cat food over her chest and her keys are in the keyhole of the door, just hanging there. It looks like she just got back from grocery shopping.
“You’re about to leave? It’s been hard to catch you lately, Kara.” Friendly Old Neighbour tilts her head, eyeing her laptop. “I miss bothering you at your doorstep and shoving large portions of food into your hand.”
“Aw, golly.” Kara scratches her cheek, grins a little bit. “I miss your cooking.”
“Has work been okay? Have you been feeding yourself properly?” Her eyes are scrutinizing, and it kind of confuses Kara, as well as makes her nervous.
“Oh. Yes! Everything’s fine on my end.” Kara adjusts her glasses, smiles shy. “I’ve been staying mostly over at my best friend’s place. Doing my work stuff. Eating and sleeping there. Yeah.”
The older woman studies her for a long, single moment. Then smiles as if she’s about to tell a secret, narrows her eyes, and asks, “Are we still going to call her that?”
It’s quiet, and Kara’s eyes widen.
She breathes out a laugh, her free hand pawing the nape of her neck. “Okay, you got me. It's not like I was trying to keep it a secret. She—Lena, she’s… my girlfriend now.” Kara licks her lips. “My person. Yeah.”
The lady’s smile widens, delighted and bright, and nods as if she isn’t surprised at the turn of events at all.
“Well, this sucks. Pros: Kara has a girlfriend. Con: who’s going to be my guinea pig, eating and testing my cooking now?”
Kara gasps. “Hey,” she protests. “I’m still your girl for that.”
“Well,” the older woman says after a moment, regarding Kara warmly. She nods. “Congrats, Kara. I’m happy for you. I like that Luthor girl—she seems really sweet and lovely.”
Kara flushes. “She is. Sweet and lovely, I mean. Thank you.”
“Oh, and before you make your way to your girlfriend’s—I assume that’s where you’re headed to now—let me pack you up some food? I cooked earlier.” Her neighbour finally twists the key in her lock and opens the door. “Please tell me your girl likes pasta.”
Kara’s face instantly brightens at the thought of home-made pasta. She grins, nodding fast—Lena likes pasta, too. Who doesn’t like pasta?
The hallway is silent, dim light shining through from under the different door cracks of each room. Kara's footsteps are light against the floor, tapping gently as she makes her way to the door on the left, right down the hall. She hums as she makes her way towards the said room, excited to finally settle down in the comfort of love, after a long day.
It's not even her home—but. She prefers it anyway, this place is bigger, warmer, more comfortable. This place has the solace of familiarity, knowing she can rest her heart in the palms of someone who will always hold it ever so gently. This place has something—someone—that her own place doesn't have. Someone who has love to give, someone who has a warm heart. Someone to come home to, when everyone else has gone home.
In the private elevator, she places her palm on the biometric scanner. It recognizes her finger prints, lights green, indicating that she has access to the highest floor of the building. She steps out of the escalator once the door opens, arriving at her destination.
Making her way through another hallway, she opens the door and is greeted with Lena's back towards her, sitting on the sofa facing her monitors. Lena has her tablet on the coffee table, a book in her hand. Kara smiles, the sight of Lena just reading a book makes her heart warm. She's so focused on her book that she hasn't heard the door open—which means she doesn't know Kara's here.
“Lena,” she finally calls softly, careful not to startle her girlfriend.
Lena looks towards the door, face breaking into a soft smile as she spots Kara standing there. “Kara,” she answers.
“Hi,” Kara murmurs, walking to the couch. “You’re home early.” Early as in, not really early—Lena worked normal office hours. Early as in, she didn’t stay back today to work overtime like she usually does.
“Yeah,” Lena mumbles. “You said you were coming home right after work.” Home. Kara’s heart leaps in her chest.
Lena rubs her eyes behind her glasses, then takes her glasses off. Places the book gently onto the stand next to the sofa, and then turns to Kara opening her arms wide. Kara goes willingly, curling herself up next to Lena. When she's settled into a comfortable position, she slips her hand into Lena's. Stroking the back of Lena's hand, she massages it gently. She knows that Lena's hands often cramp up after clutching a book for too long, fingers frozen in one position.
“Here I am.” Kara hums. “Have you eaten?”
“No, not yet. Was waiting for you.”
Lena interlaces their fingers. Kara squeezes it and brings their joined hands to her mouth, kissing the back of Lena’s. It’s easily one of Kara’s favourite things about this; just holding Lena’s hand. She doesn’t care how lame it might sound. She likes holding hands. Loves holding Lena’s.
When Lena looks up from their joined hands, Kara’s looking back at her, her smile impossibly soft, and Kara feels light-headed, wind-swept, kind of like she’s been falling for a long time, is still falling.
It’s quiet for a while, until Lena says, quietly, “Kara? I don’t want you to think you have to take care of me.”
“I don’t think that. I don’t think I could ever think that. You take such good care of you.”
“I want you to—take care of me. I do want that,” Lena says, sitting up a little straighter. “And I want to take care of you. But I don’t want you to think that I…need you. Is that…”
Kara holds their hands close against her chest. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”
“That’s why I want to be with you. One of the reasons.” Lena smiles, small and gentle, all pink cheeked and pretty. “You take care of people, and you love with everything. And I like that. I’m just—I’m afraid to need that. Afraid of what I’d do to you by needing that.”
“I’m not afraid of what you’d do to me.” Kara lifts their hands, kisses Lena’s fingers. “I’m afraid of what I might do to you. But hey, maybe if we’re afraid, it means we’ll be careful, and there won’t be anything to be afraid of.”
Lena's eyes are bright with fond amusement. She bends her head forward, and Kara mirrors her, until their foreheads touch. “I really, really like you.”
Kara’s heart is so full she feels like she can barely carry the weight of it.
She clears her throat. “So, um. I kind of have a bad track record of relationships. I don’t know how to be in one, and I’m not sure I know how to be a good girlfriend,” she says quietly, into the space between their lips. “I don’t know if I know how.”
Lena shakes her head and squeezes her hand. “Honestly, I just want what we already had. I want you to be you. You don’t have to be anything different, you don’t have to change anything about yourself, or anything about the way you act.”
Kara’s lips part slightly. She flushes.
“Just be you,” Lena says, almost pleads. “Be you, because…” Her heart is full, so full of affection that it has no choice but to spill over into her words. “Because I’m in love with you. I’m in love with you, exactly the way you are. You treat me well.”
“That’s sweet,” Kara says with a smile. “You’re sweet. You treat me well, too. Things will be different now. In a good way, I think. But different. There’ll be times I don’t know what to do. I know you feel the same way as me when it comes to this stuff, but we can learn together.”
“Yeah.” Lena hums. Her eyes flick down, and back up. “I guess the difference will be—knowing? Not just feeling, but knowing. That we can count on each other, and we’re in this all the way.”
“You can lean on me.” She nudges Lena’s nose with her. “And I can lean on you.”
Lena presses her lips to Kara’s. “Yeah. And it’s okay if you don’t know.” She chuckles under her breath. “Just talk to me. We’ll figure things out together.”
“Yeah,” Kara breathes, and holds Lena even tighter. Lena doesn't move for a moment. Then she lets out a quiet, shaky breath and moves one hand to the small of Kara’s back, the other still in her hair. They are so tangled up in each other, Kara thinks, in so many ways. She closes her eyes and loses herself in the headiness of Lena right in front of her, Lena’s hair brushing her jaw, Lena breathing against her. There are no words for this, she thinks. No words for what they are to each other, no words for the way Lena’s body feels against her own. Best friends doesn't seem right, but neither does girlfriends or lovers.
My person, Kara thinks. My person who I love, endlessly, in every way.
“Lena?” she says very quietly.
“Let’s keep going for a long time.”
Lena burrows even closer, pressing her face to Kara’s throat. “Yeah,” she says. “Yeah, okay.”
She tightens her arm around Kara, her other hand cupping Kara’s face as she leans in to give Kara her mouth. Everything is so soft and gentle and unhurried and it feels like one gigantic, fiercely powerful feeling, like Kara loves Lena in her bones and her muscles and her heart and her stomach. Their mouths press together over and over and over again as Kara takes the lead, kissing Lena until she’s dizzy and gasping for air. She brackets Lena between her arms, whispering a confession that goes heard beneath the TV’s noise.
Nipping at Lena’s bottom lip, Kara takes hold of it and sucks it in between her teeth, before she releases it with an appreciative hum. Lena tastes of home and of a future that Kara’s never wanted more badly in her life than she does at this moment.
She lets out a soft noise against Lena’s mouth.
It makes Lena smile, at the same time she holds the back of Kara’s head and pulls her down for another kiss. It ends up in Kara kissing Lena’s grin, but she likes it. It’s clumsy but sweet—just like they both are.
She traces her fingertips along the side of Lena’s face, down the bridge of her nose, and presses them to her lips. She lets her hand rest against Lena’s cheek and keeps it there.
Pulling back, her heart pounds in her throat, pulse roaring in her ears.
“So. I’ve been thinking… it’s just—you mentioned home, earlier.” Kara pauses to touch her glasses. She licks her lips. Takes a deep breath. “Um. Would you want to move in with me? Or I could move in with y—I should probably move in with you, would you want that? Or um. We could get a new place for the two of us I don’t know, what do you think—?”
“Kara,” Lena says, and Kara quiets, flushing a little. Lena rubs her neck slowly, looking at her with a quiet reverence. “You really want to live with me?”
Kara sucks in a breath, gives her a tiny nod. “Yes.”
Lena smiles, the quirk of her lips unveiling dimples, so obscenely adorable. Kara wants to bite it.
“I’d love that. You, moving here, I mean. What’s the point of you keeping your apartment and the rent when you’re here most of the time anyway?”
Lena looks around and sees Kara’s books in her bookshelf, the grocery she recently bought in the kitchen, Kara’s clothes inside the closet and drawers, Kara’s laptop and charger on the coffee table. More personal items in Lena's bed and bathrooms.
A tiny cactus plant sits on top of the kitchen counter. Little Prick. She smiles at it.
“So…” Kara drags the word out slowly, ears pinking. “That’s, um. That’s a yes, right?”
“Of course the answer is yes,” Lena says, sounding amused. “I want you here with me.”
Kara beams. “Okay, yeah. Just checking. Yeah, that’s cool.”
She feels Lena’s palm on her cheek; Lena is smiling, expression softening, and Kara feels two contradictory things: like she’s in love and like she’s still falling in love. She thinks that might be how she’ll always feel with Lena. Like she never quite hits the bottom.
Hands cup Kara's face, tilting her head back up to meet Lena's eyes. Kara sees a lovely shade of green and blue until her face gets pulled. She closes her eyes. They are so close, in each other’s body warmth, though Lena is always colder than Kara.
And maybe that’s the most beautiful thing about Lena, Kara realizes.
With her, she doesn’t have to choose a single moment. Lena will spread out across days and months and years—thousands and thousands of moments, and Kara gets to keep them all.
“I love you so much,” Lena mumbles against her lips, the words muffled.
Kara is happier than she’s ever been right now, but this isn’t their happy ending, and Kara knows that very well. Because this, right here in Lena’s living room, Lena in Kara’s navy blue sweater and cold toes pressed against Kara’s leg, is just a continuation of their story. A story that began when they locked eyes for the first time in Lena’s office, the morning sunny and bright and clear. A story where there were tears, a story where there was sex, a story where there were countless nights where Lena made Kara feel ridiculously in love. A story that Kara never thought would end up with her feelings being returned, being loved back, yet look at how things are now.
It’s not their happy ending—not yet. Brushing a hand softly against Lena's cheek, she kisses Lena again, and again, and again. No end in sight, just as Kara wants it. Always, every way, endlessly.
It’s not their happy ending—not even close. Kara knows there is a lot more to come: lots of laughing until their bellies hurt, lots of late night walks and pancakes at two in the morning and an endless amount of realizing how Lena is, undoubtedly, the love of her life.
Minutes or hours or maybe even decades later, Kara pulls back. Lena’s flushed a gorgeous red and she’s smiling, still, and she nuzzles gently against Kara’s cheek in a way that makes Kara completely weak at the knees. Kara inhales, exhales shakily. She reaches over to lace Lena's fingers with her own. They fit together in their own way, like they had from the very beginning.
“Lena? Before we make dinner, I just have one more important question.”
“What is it, darling?” Lena tucks a lock of blonde hair behind Kara’s ear.
“Can we adopt a puppy and a cat?”
Kara smiles as she asks this, soft and warm, and like a flower tilted beautifully towards the sun, Lena blooms.