Shade has added Reinhardt, Lukas of the Deliverance, Prince Berkut, Anthony, Deftater Peeler and 99+ others to the chat!
Shade has renamed the chat to This is so sad, Azura sing Lost in Thoughts all Alone
Berkut: SHADE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IT'S 3 AM
Shade: I figured this way we can spread important info and data from battles faster
Berkut: BUT NOT AT 3 AM GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP
Shade: There are children in this chat
Ike: Well there goes all my plans of sleeping in to avoid fantastical fitness hour
Shade: OMG YOU LEARNED MY SLANG
Shade: Eliwood is the tru dad friend
Shade has changed Eliwood's name to Tru Dad
Tru Dad: Thanks Shade. Now get some rest, I know your anxiety keeps you up at night.
Shade: Good Night
Tru Dad: Sweet Dreams
Shade is now Idle
Berkut: h o w??????
Tru Dad: Nini and Roy IG
Tru Dad: Plus experience from myself. Nothing I need to ramble on at 3 am
Ike: Whatever. Shade won't mind if I add a couple of my bros from smash?
Ike has added Richter Belmont, Pit Icarus and Daisy Sarasa to the chat!
Ike has changed his name to RADiant Hero
Richter: the fuk Ike. It's 2 am over here.
RADiant Hero: Blame my insomniac summoner. She started this.
RADiant Hero: Also Tru Dad is Eliwood aka Roy's dad
Tru Dad: Hello!
Richter: I can smell the dad friend smell off of him.
RADiant Hero: Plus Anthony misses you. A lot.
Frederick: WHY IS EVERYONE DISTURBING MILORD'S SLEEP!?
Richter is now offline
Tru Dad is idle
RADiant Hero is idle
Berkut: I'm trying to fucking sleep so beats me.
Berkut is idle
Anthony has changed Frederick's name to Frederick Kruger
Anthony is offline
Frederick Kruger: This'll be a disaster won't it?
2 CHAPTERS 1 DAY I'M HYPED FOR MORE BEASTS
Anthony: So I'm just gonna slip the new heroes into the chat
Anthony has added Kaden, Keaton, Velouria and Selkie to the chat!
Anthony has renamed the chat FURRIES UNITE
Gaius: Woah woah kid u forgot someone
Gaius has added Panne to the chat!
Shade is online
Shade has renamed the chat This is so sad, Azura sing lost in thoughts all alone
Shade: Anthony we don't change the name.
Anthony: But new heroes!
Anthony: And their furries!
Gaius: Panne is a taguel. Not a furry
Keaton: Kid, the term is wolfskin and kitsune
Shade: This is what happens when you expose this pure child to the internet
Shade: Also your waifu has 7 alts
Keaton: how do u know?
Shade: She ded ass told me she was into you
RADiant Hero: O O F
RADiant Hero has changed Keaton's name to Titmilla Sucker
RADiant Hero: I think that fits.
Lon'qu: The fuk did I miss since you people want to be up @3am
Shade: Nothin much
Frederick Kruger: Shade, we need to put a limit on who can change names.
Shade: Lissa got your tongue?
Anthony is now offline
Lon'qu: That explains it.
Reinhardt: Morning! <(^.^)>
Reinhardt: Shade, new announcement
Shade: Anthony told me by renaming the chat into something bout furries.
Gaius: Furry porn?
Shade has changed Gaius' name to Rabbit Furry Fucker
Reinhardt: S H A D E
Shade: I know what goes on Gaius.
Shade: I have the power of the Helix Fossil and anime on my side.
Shade: Also mood name Frederick.
Chrom: Why is the device pinging so rapidly?
Shade: Notifications. Mainly for important stuff
Reinhardt has changed Chrom's name to Shitty Ike clone
Shitty Ike clone: Rude
Shitty Ike clone has changed his name to Google Chrom
Google Chrom: Much better
Richter: Should I even ask?
Shade: How did you even get in here?
Richter: @RADiant Hero
RADiant Hero: rude thanks
RADiant Hero has changed Richter's name to A MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS
Shade: Nah it needs to be more appropriate
Shade has changed A MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS name to Alucard's Whore
Alucard's Whore: ok FIRST OF ALL
Shade: You like vampire dick.
Google Chrom: @Sigurd, this guy's getting roasted harder than you at the Bellhalla BBQ
Sigurd: Fuck off Chrom
Arvis: I was going to make a comment but then I realized this thing will fall apart on itself
Sigurd: Like your marriage TO MY WIFE and YOUR HALF SISTER!?
Arvis: I TOLD YOU I'M IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH @Fjorm NOW!
Shade: Don't drag her into this. I know you want to fuck each other.
Reinhardt: S H A D E W H A T T H E A C T U A L F U C K
Reinhardt has banned Shade from This is so sad, Azura sing lost in thoughts all alone.
Reinhardt: Now maybe the chat will be more civilized.
Reinhardt: Or at least calm down till Shade can control herself.
Reinhardt has changed Alucard's Whore's name to Richter
Reinhardt had changed Rabbit Furry Fucker's name to Gaius
Gaius: Tiny hands how did you even ban the creator of the chat?
Google Chrom: Don't get mad about the hands thing, he just calls everyone by a nickname.
Anthony is online
Anthony: Dude, I saw the entire thing. How are we this messed up?
Anthony: When I was hiding from Frederick, Lissa was able to show me how this thing imploded on itself.
Anthony: Like Shade's self esteem.
Berkut: WHO DOES THIS SASSY CHILD BELONG TO?!
Google Chrom: Prolly u fucker
Now with more sex jokes
Reinhardt: Ok now that Shade is gone we need to establish rules. We’re keeping the name, but we need to restrain the swearing. Especially if Anthony is here.
Anthony: But i say the F word all the time.
Berkut: *spits out dick*
Berkut: I MEANT DRINK
Lon’qu has changed Berkut’s name to Dick Drinker
Reinhardt: WAIT WHAT F WORD!? WHO TAUGHT YOU TO SWEAR!?
Lon’qu: Crisis averted. Now can we add Shade back?
Reinhardt: Hold on a sec, she forgot to add the Askr trio
Reinhardt as added Prince Alfonse, Princess Sharena, Commander Anna and Shade to the chat!
Shade has removed Prince Alfonse and Commander Anna from the chat
Shade has banned Prince Alfonse and Commander Anna from This is so sad, Azura sing Lost in Thoughts All Alone
Shade: Too buzzkilly for me man.
Sharena: No wonder you didn’t hold me back from calling him a cockatoo.
Shade: Nice nickname Berkut. Did Fernand set it up?
Dick Drinker: No, your shit.
Shade: My what?
Dick Drinker has changed Lon’qu’s name to Shade’s Taco Bell Shit
Shade: Ok i just went through the chat and…
Shade: How does this child know about Fergalicious?
Shade: And my emotional issues?
Shade: Also petition to keep Keaton’s name as Titmilla sucker
[Shade has sent Something About Castlevania Animated. Mpv]
Shade: I found your grandpa’s sex tape.
Richter: That’s not even a sex tape?
Shade: But it sounds like it.
Reinhardt has muted Shade from This is So Sad, Azura sing lost in thoughts all alone
Reinhardt: Also that voice clip was that OG Richter voice?
Richter: Maybe… Puberty’s wierd
Lyn: If you think about it, funerals are just family reunions but with one less member and a lot more hate
Richter: And u are????
Reinhardt has unmuted Shade
A moment to pay respects for the new chapter (SPOILERS)
Shade: A moment of silence for the lost of Gustav. Press F to pay respects
Gustav: But I’m not even dead?
Shade: @Sharena I don’t remember inviting your dad to the chat. Also @Gustav how are you alive? We saw your head get cut off by Rita Repulsive.
Eir: @Shade you should be suprised how efficiently @Lyon helped me make a random corpse look like him.
Shade: Someone explain to me what’s going on
???: Hel might be death itself but I command death. So Hel is essentially my bitch.
Shade: Ok who are you and why is your name blurred like that.
???: I cannot reveal that at this time. L8r nerds
Shade: Was that Lyon?
Lyon: No I’m right here…
Shade: *thinking emoji*
Eir: Well at least we have one less body count on our hands?
Shade: Yeah. Still doesn’t explain where my orbs went.
Ram Squad unite!
No Greil or Ike... But Gray showed up
Alm has added Gray to the chat
Alm: @Kliff @Tobin @Faye @Lukas @Celica
Alm: Look who showed up!
Alm: Ram squad!
Gray: Ram Squad!
Kliff: I can’t even hear you and I know you two are chanting in unison
Gray: Shut Up Kliff.
Lukas: Settle down guys, let them be happy
Alm has changed Lukas’ name to Mom
Mom: We seemingly have adopted like 5 or 6 kids
Reinhardt: Make that 8
Reinhardt: I may or may not have adopted Anthony and Berkut
Mom: What the actual fuck
Faye: That’s GRAYt guys, you made Gray come home and Lukas swear bc of you
Celica: Make it 9. If I’m adopted, then Conrad is adopted.
Conrad: Celica no!
Alm: We’ve gotta better mom than Commander Mom
Reinhardt: istg Alm. I don’t want to be at her blade at my throat bc of you lil shits.
Alm: @RADiant Hero, Get your mom into this chat
RADiant Hero: My mom is dead you prick!
Alm: The other one.
Alm: Also how can I be a prick if my mom’s dead too?
Mom: *thinking emoji*
RADiant Hero has changed Mom’s name to Lukas
RADiant Hero: Let’s just pretend this conversation never happened.
Anthony is now Offline
RADiant Hero: Shit.
Chapter brought to you by tumblr
Richter: Imagine if someone were to hand you a box of all the things you lost throughout your life
Berkut: It would be nice to get my sense of purpose back!
Anthony: Oh my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding it
Zelgius: My will to live! I haven’t seen this in decades!
Reinhardt: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!
Shade: Mental Stability my old friend!
Richter: @Shade @Zelgius @Reinhardt @Berkut @Anthony @Berkut Could you guys lighten up a little?
Lyon: I think I left my heart and soul in there, could I check it?
Soren: Actual happiness thank you!
Lukas: There’s those pesky emotions.
Elise: Guys. Stop
Elise: I’m still looking for my sour gummy worms could you be depressing and emotional somewhere else?
Random Messages through out a week or so
Shade: Dude people in Muspell are so afraid of gluten. Like I could've killed Sutr with a bagel if I wanted to.
Shade: Hell I could've bargained back Ylgr and Veronica back while eating a box of twinkies
Cecilia: @Reinhardt You are actually a disgusting excuse of a Mage and General and we think that you should be fed off to @Nino for something more useful. Also you have tiny hands
Reinhardt: I came here to have a good time and honestly I feel attacked.
Arvis: I'd walk through fire for Julia. Well not fire as it's super dangerous for you @Sigurd @Rinea . But like a super humid room. But not too humid, because my hair
Berkut: Your ass is lucky I'm in the middle of the tempest.
Alm: Vitamin C means Vitamin Yes.
Shade: I don't need anything on Black Friday. I just need to get in a fight to feel alive.
Chapter 8: The Lords Chat!
Shade makes a Lords Chat bc 3 houses is coming soon and she don't need more spoilers
Shade has created Together We Noot
Shade as added @Marth @Almond @Celica @Sigurd @Seliph @Leif @Roy @Lyn @Eliwood @Hector @Eirika @Ephraim @Ike @Michaiah @Chrom @Lucina
Shade has made Marth Admin
Shade: 3 houses is coming soon
Shade: So here's a chat to get everyone acquainted to the new lords when they release.
Chrom: @Shade Where are the Fates lords and the Askr Trio
Shade: We don't need them. Plus Fates doesn't have lords. It has mary sues.
Chrom changed his name to Google Chrom
Ike has changed his name to RADiant Hero
Hector has changed his name to #Rektor
Hector has changed the chat name to #FuckFates
Eliwood: ALM'S IN THE CHAT HECTOR
Eliwood: YOU KNOW WHAT BERKUT AND LUKAS WILL DO TO YOU
#Rektor: Fuk u eli
Marth: Everyone settle down. I'm sure the main chat is just as hectic as this one.
Shade: I leave the chat to you marth.
Chapter 9: Smashing Chatroom
Ike has created Smashing of The Bros
Ike has invited Marth,Roy,Robin (M), Reflet, Lucina, Chrom, Corn (M) Corn (F),Richter Belmont, Pit Icarus and Daisy of Sarasa to the chat!
Robin (M): Wait how is Pit in this chat if he can't read
Pit: Text to speech.
Pit: Nino has something similar but it has ur guys voices for everyone's messages.
Roy: Makes a lot of sense
Ike: Shit forgot 3 people
Ike has added Zelgius, Tiki and Lyn to the chat!
Ike: Now everyone's here.
Zelgius: Why Ike
Chapter 10: Rando Chat 2
Jakob: @Felicia How do you fuck up rice?
Flora: @Felicia And how do you fuck up so badly it comes out in one cylindrical mess?
Felicia: I'm bad at everything
Valter has sent Tounge.vid
Lucius: @Valter you know church is free right?
Lyon: And so is death what's your point Lu?
Anthony: If everyone assumes guys with long hair are gay and girls with short hair are lesbians then that means all bald men are secretly eagles.
Elise: I knew something was up with Hans.
Shade: If blood is thicker than water, and syrup is thicker than blood
Shade: Holy shit Pancakes are more important than people
Sharena: Shade have you been in the cleaning supplies again?
Reinhardt: nah, she's prolly secretly a canadian.
Reinhardt: Carpe Diem means seize the day
Reinhardt: Carpe Noctem means seize the night
Reinhardt: Carpe Natem means seize dat ass
Olwen: @Reinhardt this is why at 26 you still haven't lost your virginity.
Berkut: Based on last night, I'm sure that's not the only thing he lost.
Reinhardt: I lost Mario Kart ;-;
Richter: For y'all who says Reinhardt is a shitty parent
Richter: Just remember Simba was raised by a gay warthog fucker and a gay meerkat lookin ass and he's the king of fucking africa now
*In a private chat with Alfonse and Anna*
Alfonse: This whole chatroom idea was a fucking mistake.
Anna: Can't believe Shade banned us.
Shade: Sit on my face UwU
Lyn: SIT ON YOUR OWN DAMN FACE SHADE!!!! I'M BUSY WITH FLORINA!!!
Berkut: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Niles:( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Reinhardt: *( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) INTENSIFIES*
Florina: It's not what you guys think. We're watching Korra together! (^-^)/✿
The one where I finally have Mist and Greil. Mist is +atk -def and her papa is neutral.
Mist has started a new chat
Mist has renamed the chat Greil's Memeceraries
Mist has added Ike, Greil, Titania, Soren, Oscar, Mia and Zelgius to the chat!
Ike has changed his name to RADiant Hero
Zelgius has changed his name to Burger King
Mist: I'm gay.
RADiant Hero: Is it for Jill?
RADiant Hero: Because if it isn't, I owe Haar 20 gold
Mist: You know the green haired dancer girl?
Soren: The one who hangs out with Thundercock's sister?
Burger King: His name is Reinhardt Soren.
Burger King: You know damn well he could and will kill you if someone invited him to this chat.
Mist: This is why I made it private so Anthony cant ruin it.
Mia: Oh! Lene?
Mist: Yeah... I'm not sure how I was gonna break it to you guys.
RADiant Hero: Hold on for a second, lemme add the rest of the Radiance Bros
RADiant Hero has added Elincia, Reyson, Leanne, Michaiah, Nephenee, Sanaki, Naialah, Tibarn and Naesala to the chat!
RADiant Hero: My sister's gay. You heard it here folks
Tibarn: Did you people invite Oliver here?
Mist: No. I have him blocked for the time he sent me...
Mist: Well he called it a brave sword but it looked more like...
Mist: Not much of a weapon
Titania is offline
Burger King: Wait she was here the whole time?
Michaiah: Who wants to watch this shit go down?
Naesala: Whoever added Leanne to the chat and forgot she can't read Tellius.
Reyson: She's been picking up on Shade's lingo. Actually doing a lot better on it
RADiant Hero: Oof.
A failed attempt at poetry
Kagero: She was poetry but he couldn't read
RADiant Hero: His name was Jared he was nineteen
Anthony: When his parents built a very strange machine
Arvis: Watch that scene dig in the dancing queen
Hector: AAY Macaerena
Shade: What the actual fuck did this chat devolve into.
Shade and Lyon are filthy homestucks
Shade: Tag your god tier
Shade: I'm Knight of Heart
Lyon: Mage of Void
Marth: Lord of Hope
Alm: idek @Celica Help
Celica: IDK either!
Seliph: Heir of Light!
RADiant Hero: Rouge of Blood
Lucina: Knight of Time
Shade: Luci... That belongs to an actual character
Lucina: I know
Reinhardt: Mage of Mind
Raquesis: Sylph of Light
Tiki: Sylph of Heart
Hector: Lord of Rage
Lyn: Rouge of Time
Tru Dad: Muse of Heart
Lucius: All I know is the light aspect. Possibly Maid
Lon'qu: Rouge of Mind
Shade: Am i like the only knight?
Shade: That isn't canon?
Julia: Mage of Space
Shade: I'll take that as a yes.
RADiant Hero: @Zelgius is a Knight of Hope
RADiant Hero: He killed my dad.
Berkut: Prince of Rage
Lukas: Page of Blood
Shade: No wonder, you have to put all the blood back into rein
Anthony: Seer of Life!
I have GT headcanons for every lord +other of my favorites but I forgot the Renais twins, Almica, Micha sue and Chrom's
Chapter 15: The one where Sharena finally reveals her true feelings
Sharena: So me and Shade are watching Digimon as she calls it
Sharena: My god one of the characters is a fucking mood.
Shade: Kari maybe?
Sharena: He's just the mood of the century. Always being in your more famous brother's shadow, and when you do get something interesting they drag you away from it.
Sharena: Of course I wouldn't wish for Alfonse to be hit by a car or disappear...
Shade has changed Sharena's name to Askr Emperess
Shade: Ur welcome
Shade: Wait who'd be Wormmon then?
Anthony: Probably me.
Anthony: Don't worry, I'm used to being whipped by people.
Anthony: Mainly Anankos
Askr Emperess has changed Anthony's name to Anthonymon
Reinhardt: I knew I was referred to as Davis for a while
Reinhardt: But jesus...
Berkut: And people still think I'm his and Shade's child.
Berkut: Even though he's a fictional character from her world so no way in ass that could happen.
Shade: My god I realized something
Shade: Kari has the same va as Olwen's alt.
Shade: Kari and Olwen both admire their older brothers
Shade: Tai is secretly Reinhardt confirmed.
Reinhardt: Please stop.
Shade has added Idunn, Rutger, Thea, Sue and Lugh to the chat!
Rutger has changed his name to Critger
Critger: Why do you have the same title as me?
Lon'qu: More like are you the copy of me?
Shade has sent CritterMan.jpg
Shade: This is literally the exact same picture.
Lyon: So is Lugh and Raigh mine and Nino's or is Jaffar the father?
Jaffar: *knife emoji*
Shade: Jaffar, no.
Shade: Go attack Valter.
Shade: Or Oliver
Shade: Just not Lyon he's a sweetheart
Matthew: Or Leila for that matter!
Matthew: You fuckin edgy cunt
Shade: I think Matt just went Fe!Scottish for a minute
Critterman.jpg is literally that spiderman image of him pointing at himself but with Lon'qu and Rutger's heads plastered over the spideys.
Chapter 17: The One Where everyone has stoner thoughts
Because it's 3 am and Shade has insomnia again
Shade: Dude I just realized something
Shade: It's raining men and let the bodies hit the floor were about the same thing
Shade: But one was more optimistic and the other was pessemistic.
Tru Dad: Shade
Tru Dad: It's 3 am go to sleep
Alm: Lasers were seen as a scientific breakthrough, now we use them to play with cats
Alm: Computers were seen as a technological advancement of the century, now we use them to look at cats
Alm: Therefore it's safe to assume that the hypothesis of science being made for cats is valid.
Niles: Imagine having sex with a ghost and someone walks in and they see your asshole opening and closing for no reason and your moaning.
Lucius: Imagine going to church, praying to Naga and realizing there are innocent children in this chat?
Lucius has banned Niles from This is So Sad, Azura Sing Lost in Thoughts All Alone
Tru Dad: When did you get admin powers?
Lucius: Mod powers. Shade gave her main 8 mod powers.
Valter: You can't spell advertisements without semen between the tits
Lon'qu: The fuck did I just read?
Lon'qu: @Eirika @Ephraim @Lyon I am so sorry you have to deal with this man
Lon'qu has banned Valter from This is So Sad, Azura Sing Lost in Thoughts all Alone
Lon'qu: Omg Reinhardt has to delete so many comments when he wakes up to prevent Anthony from seeing them
Anthony: Too late, already screenshoted them.
Lon'qu: @Shade @Reinhardt @Lukas
Lon'qu: The lil gremlin is out of control
Seliph: Pizza should have a poison in the sauce and the antidote in the thick crust part so we can kill off the people who don't eat the crust
Lon'qu: S E L I P H
Lon'qu: @Sigurd I know your awake fucking Dierdre
Arvis: Bold of you to assume that
Raquesis: She's in here with me and some of the other girls. We're finishing up a game of Bullshit and heading to bed.
Lon'qu: Is Sigurd having gay sex with Arvis?
Lon'qu: Oh god.
Lon'qu: BURNING ASHES IS CANON
Finn: Edit, I just checked in on them, Arvis got stuck in the toilet bowl lid.
Finn: Eldigan and Quan are laughing their asses off
Finn: This is the shit I have to deal with folks
Tiki: Are Medusa's leg hairs tiny snakes?
Pit: Hold on
Pit: Is she even here
RADiant Hero: Hol on
RADiant Hero has added PaluBAEa to the chat!
Palutena: Sup nerds.
Pit: Are Medusa's leg hairs tiny snakes?
Palutena: Pit. It is 2 am. Go the fuck to sleep.
Palutena: All of you. Sleep now.
Google Chrom: Fitbits are Tamagotchis
Google Chrom: Except the Dumbass Creature you have to keep alive is yourself
Google Chrom: Why can't this be digimon?
Henry: Cannibalism can solve both overpopulation and the world hunger epidemic
Lyon: How long does it take for Grave Robbing to become Archeology
Marth: Based on genital structure, men should be wearing the skirts and women the pants
Pit: NO PANTS MARS
RADiant Hero: NO PANTS MARS
Richter: NO PANTS MARS
Caeda: NO PANTS MARS
Gordin: 5 POINTS!
Titania: EVERYONE GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP! SOME OF US WANT TO BE PRODUCTIVE TOMORROW
Anthony is offline
Titania is offline
Marth is offline
RADiant Hero is offline
Richter is offline
Caeda is offline
Gordin is offline
Alm is offline
Seliph is offline
Lon'qu is offline
Lyon is offline
Henry is offline
Google Chrom is offline
PaluBAEa is offline
Tiki is offline
Finn is offline
Arvis is offline
Sigurd is offline
Raquesis is offline
Tru Dad is offline
Shade: Hello Darkness my old friend.
Arvis: I'm making fuckin mac and cheese.
Alm: Weren't you banned from kitchen duty?
Fjorm has sent selfie lol.jpg
Fjorm: Not with me in the kitchen (^_^)~*
Seliph: Two bowls please, both extra cheesy!
Julia: You know how to make mine dad.
Julius: Wait, am I still in this family even if I'm from another timeline?
Dierdre: We need the dad
Shade: Sorry to inturrupt but can someone grill me a cheese?
Shade: I have lost my voice and my head feels like f2p anuses when Reinhardt shoves his hand so far up their asses he can make people into muppets.
Arvis: @Reinhardt @Ishtar @Olwen
Arvis: Pls explain
Reinhardt: It's a joke. Please don't think I can do that. You know my sleeves are just really big and I don't do that thing
Reinhardt: Also 3 bowls of mac and cheese please. 1 with cayanne please
Berkut: Make that 2 more. Anthony wants some and I'm wanting to try this food
Fjorm: ALL RIGHT YOU HEARD WHAT THEY SAID LET'S GET SOME KRAFT BOILING!
Shade is literally my mood right now and everything she says is 500% accurate aside from the muppet part. We are still testing if his hand goes that far up people's asses.
Marth: @Shade I forgot to add some of my friends from smash. Is it ok if I add them?
Shade: Sure as long as they don't cause trouble. I don't need that stuff rn
Marth has added Zeldamn, Really Shulking It, Arm Pit, Lasagaroar, Big Mac and T̴̪͇͙͉̖͈̲̯̻̤̲̬̀̓͋̒́͗ͅḨ̴̖̮͇̞͓̳͖̱̿́͝E̴̜͑̈́̍̀̂̌̀̎̽̍̓̉̈́̎̆ ̶̘̫͇̣̲̠̮̳͙̓͆̇̊́̈́̒̒B̵̛͈̻̺͇̥͖̯̊͋̃̎̆̉̋̅̇̓̋͊͝͝Ą̸̙̝̲̬̘͇͈̤̺̪͙͉̽͌̔̏̌́̚͘͘͜B̶̨̪̩͔̤̻̀̌͒̈́̈Y̷̡̯̭̺̣̰̟̲͐͌̉̈̈͒͑̍ to the chat!
Samus: Who's Lasagaroar
Marth: Incineroar. I'd feel bad if I didn't include one furball.
Marth: Normally it's Pikachu but Pikachu can't type.
Samus: But Pit and Nino are here????
Shulk: It's good not to question things like this.
Shulk: @Lucina TIME BROS
Lucina: TIME BROS!
Dark Pit: Alright, where's that fucking faker with my voice.
Shade: N O I A M N O T D E A L I N G W I T H T H I S
Shade is now idle
Richter: Now look at what you've done, you've scared Shade!
Anthony: She's not scared, just 500% done with life
Zelda: Is Incineroar lurking or...?
Zelda: Because he has like no reason for a chatroom
Marth: I added him.
Daisy: So is this like a smash/fire emblem reunion?
RADiant Hero: No it isn't. We just get bored a lot
Zelda has added Peachy~ to the chat!
Zelda: Meme time.
Lon'qu: Not right now. I have the powers of moderators and Jojo on my side!
Anthony: U didn't even meme it right.
Reinhardt: As long as we don't add the dads of smash to this chat nothing will collapse on itself.
Reinhardt: The dad jokes shall be contained.
Arvis: Dude, there's more than enough dads here. Why would we need more dads?
Reinhardt: I didn't think this through did I?
Next time...? Possibly dad jokes
Chapter 20: The One With The Dad Jokes
Sans is approving of me
Google Chrom has added Bowser to the chat!
Google Chrom: So what do you call a nosy pepper?
Robin (M): An abomination?
Shade: Nah that's me.
Google Chrom: Jalepeno Buisness!
Arvis: What did one eye say to the other eye?
Julia: pls no
Arvis: Between you and me, something smells!
Corn (F): What concert cost 45 cents?
Berkut: A shitty one
Corn (F): 50 cent featuring Nickleback!
Shade: How do you fit 5 Snorlaxes and 3 Wailords onto a bus?
Reinhardt: You don't
Shade: Nah, ya just gotta POKEMON!
Reinhardt is offline
Google Chrom: Did ya hear about the Italian Chef who died?
Google Chrom: He pasta way
Anthony has logged off
Julia: Now look at what you've done.
Arvis: I guess he just ran out of thyme.
Julia has logged off
Tru Dad: Here today, gone Tomato
Leo: Just no
Leo has logged off
Bartre: His wife's still in shock, I guess cheeses still not over it
Richter has logged off
Pit has logged off
Tiki has logged off
RADiant Hero has logged off
Lon'qu has logged off
Raquesis has logged off
Lukas has logged off
Boey has logged off
Lucius has logged off
Seliph: I guess they never sausage a tragedy coming!
Hector: Ashes to Ashes, Crust to Crust
Sigurd: There's just not mushroom in this world for chefs these days
Bowser: We cannoli do so much for them
Quan: Currently sending olive the prayers to the family
Greil: I guess he'll become a pizza history
Titania: I'm sorry but
Titania has logged off
Shade: What do you call a pencil without lead?
Google Chrom: Dude, my wedding was so great even the cake was in tiers!
Frederick Kruger: No it wasn't.
Seliph: What did the shy rock wish for?
Seliph: That they were a little boulder!
Lissa: Seliph, please stop enabling them.
Takumi: I HAVE TAKEN CORN HOSTAGE! STOP THE JOKES OR I WILL SHOOT HER
Anthony is online
Anthony: Come on guys, people are drinking on these jokes, we really need to raise the bar!
Lyn: What was with the screaming from Corrin's room?
Shade: I'll be here.... ALL THE FUCKING TIME!
Shade: AND THANK YOU SIDE WALKS FOR KEEPING ME OFF THE STREET!
Google Chrom: You all were blessings.
Takumi: L E A V E
Take Takumi's warning however you want. Anthony just enabled him
Chapter 21: The one where Shade's sick
Shade: I need the soup of the Ramen
Reinhardt: SHADE I AM IN FUCKING GOD KNOWS WHERE I CANNOT GET YOU RAMEN
Shade: Is there anymore medicine I can take so I don't feel like I was cursed with the 9 day curse?
Lucius: Actually getting some sleep and not texting me.
Shade: Grill me a cheese
Berkut: Can't. Stuck dealing with uprisers in Muspell rn.
Shade: Does releasing sexual frustrations help cure a head cold? Asking for a friend
Raquesis: NO! >:0 GO TO SLEEP!
Shade: I have coughed up the plague. I need the ades of power
Lyon: I don't know what your talking about but I'll send Henry to collect the plague sample so we can figure out what went wrong
Shade: @Peri Can you kill me already? I am ready for death
Peri: I am coming up with the soup!
Nino: And I have the tissues!
Shade: Let Soren, Innes, the morgans and Arvis know I am putting tactics to them today. I cannot deal with anything
Sharena: Who's on Anthony watch then?
Shade: I'm sure he can't cause too much trouble right?
Sharena: He changed the wifi password to penis because Michaiah offered him $5 and a bag of gummy worms.
Shade: Pass the child off to someone who won't cause him harm
Shade: Like Hector.
Chapter 22: The One With the Gay
This is just my gaycanons
Reinhardt has created a new chat
Reinhardt has renamed the chat to Everyone is Gay!
Reinhardt has added Leon, Mist, Lene,Lukas, Leo, Hrid, Alm, Seliph, Faye, Olwen, Florina, Lyn, Lucius, Raven, Lyon, Knoll, Ephraim, Innes, and Ike to the chat!
Ike has changed his name to RADiant Hero
Innes: Why is there a straight in this chat?
Reinhardt: He's amBIguous.
RADiant Hero: I like guys sometimes, sometimes I like girls, other times I just like meat.
Mist: Brother this is my wonderful girlfriend.
Lene: ^_^ /
Innes: Not the straight I was going for
Lukas: I'm ace aro Innes. I thought we were over this.
Innes: But you and
Lukas: He's pan.
Lukas: Also fuck off your having an orgy with Lyon, Knoll and Ephraim.
Ephraim: Sorry. Polyamory!
Leon: Shit wait if that counts then I need to add Zeke/Camus
Leon has added Camus, Nyna and Tatiana to the chat!
Leon has changed his name to zegayLorde
Camus: Gay chat? Why am I here?
Reinhardt: Everyone is gay. You too. I consider Polys to be gay.
zegayLorde: *cries in gay*
Seliph: Fyi I think I'm Solarian (aka he/him and they/them)
Reinhardt: Can i still call you Seli on the they/them days?
Knoll: Glad to see I'm not the only one struggling with identity
Lene: Pardon me for asking but why?
Lyon: We're trying to help him transition better but Grado is better at fucking up than medicines.
Reinhardt: @Knoll @Lyon Arvis is looking over my shoulder and he's offering to help you transition.
Reinhardt: Also he's offering to help people make blankets of their flags.
RADiant: Are bis valid in this chat
Reinhardt: It's always bi appreciation in this house
RADiant Hero: @Richter
RADiant Hero: He's got a gf who went batshit and is now fucking a bat.
Richter: Ok 1, fuk u
Richter: 2 I'm not a furry for fucking Alucard
Richter: So piss off with that.
Lyon: So no one is creeped about the whole Knoll/Me/Ephraim/Innes thing?
Camus: Nah dude. We gucci w that
Lyn: Bi squad up!
Tatiana: Wait is Lucius trans as well?
Lucius: No I am not. Just really gay
Chapter 23: The One with Bruno
Veronica adds her brother to hell
Veronica has added Bruno to the chat!
Veronica: My brother's gonna be summonable for the 2019 bun banner
Bruno: Fuck off. I did not consent to this.
Alfonse: At least we match Zac.
Shade: Wait @Bruno do we call you Bruno or Zacharias? I just don't wanna make you uncomfortable
Bruno: Either or. I don't give a shit
Loki: Am I the only one who is super unnerved by this?
Loki: Especially since Sutr and Hel won't let me be in my more comfortable form
Loki: Doesn't help that my female form is the summonable one
Loki: Now I have to wear a bunny suit that exposes my cleavage
Sharena: Wait your trans?
Shade: Wait Alfonse's not banned from this chat?
Loki: Yeah. I'm trying to go FtM but these fuckin devs won't let me
Loki: FFS you have camoola for a reason
Loki: Let me transition in peace dammit.
Loki: I like the aesthetic colors of the fem!me but
Loki: I don't like the tiddies
Shade: @Lucina would like to have those tiddies
Loki: So none of you have a problem?
Shade: Reinhardt's pan
Shade: Fernand is demi
Shade: Lukas is ace/aro
Shade: And I'm fuckin trash ur point?
Shade's a mood
Shade: Loki's spring form makes me uncomfortable
Shade: It's this close to showing her clit
Loki: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Loki: IT EMPHASISES THE TWO THINGS I HATE ABOUT MYSELF: MY GENETALIA AND MY TITS
Loki: Aesthetic? Cool. Bow? Cool.
Loki: Boobs and almost showing clit?
Loki: Not cool
Loki: At least I can sympathize with Lucina and Cordelia now
Lyn: AND ME I HAVE SEEN SOME SHIT
Chapter 25: The One With The Gay Chat Part 2
It's a game of guess the gay.
Reinhardt: @Seliph is Solarian/probably gay
Reinhardt: @Knoll is Trans/Gay
Reinhardt: @Loki is Trans
Reinhardt: @Mist, @Lene @Florina are Lesbians
Reinhardt: @Lukas is Asexual/Aromantic
Reinhardt: @Fernand is Demisexual
Reinhardt: I'm Pan
Reinhardt: @Lyn @RADiant Hero are bi
Reinhardt: @Ephraim is polyamoric and gay
Reinhardt: @Leon is hella gay
Reinhardt: @Innes and @Raven won't admit they're gay
Reinhardt: And @Lucius is gay.
Reinhardt: Did I miss anyone?
Olwen: Reinhardt you dumbfuck
Olwen: I'M BI
Olwen: @Faye is Bi @Leo @Hrid are gay
Alm: I'm probably queer, I haven't figured it out yet
Alm: @Richter is Bi @Lyon is probably gay
Anthony: And I'm here for some reason. Who added me?
Julia: Whoops wrong chat I invited you to. Also #bisquad
Chapter 26: Leo's Story Time
A short thing
Leo: True story from Nohr's bullshit of rulers
Leo: Someone accused Iago and Hans of raping a girl
Leo: So they got the lawyer and he's like "Just normal business clothes"
Leo: Fuckers showed up to court naked and Hans had a whip
Leo: Immediately convicted but some how we still keep the fuckers because my dad is a fucking pile of shit for brains who doesn't take rape seriously.
Arvis: Then we overthrow the Nohrians
Oboro: OVERTHROW THE NOHRIANS!
Chapter 27: The One Where Chaos
Red is the only color I'm into for this banner
Michiah has added Yune to This is So Sad, Azura Sing Lost In Thoughts All Alone
Shade: Since when can birbs type
Yune: I am no ordinary birb
Yune: I am goddess birb
RADiant Hero: More like Loli Goddess
Yune: Bite my ass you subhuman fucker
Michiah: Why can't we have nice things in the main chat?
Yune: Someone tell the gremlin to stop throwing bread at me.
RADiant Hero: Which gremlin?
Yune: The one who looks like a feral child.
RADiant Hero: Oh
RADiant Hero: @Anthony
RADiant Hero: Throw baguettes at her. They'll feed her longer
Michiah: I K E
Chapter 28: The One with the Pun
True story. Yune is +def -atk
Shade: Yune came home on the free summon
Yune: I guess you can call it
Yune: God Bless
RADiant Hero: Shut the fuck up I'm trying to sleep!
Chapter 29: The One where it's just vines because I've been watching too many vine comps
Reinhardt: There is only one thing worse than being killed
Reinhardt: Anthony getting killed
Xander: So your saying Anthony is the problem? I knew we should've killed the little shit
Lukas: REINHARDT NO
Shade: @Chrom @Robin (M) @Frederick
Shade: Three bros chillin in a hot tub, 5 feet apart cuz their not gay
Marth: @Shade is that a police here?
RADiant Hero: I'M CALLING THE WEED
Shade: Taco Bell has Fresha Voca Do and I've never felt more alive
Shade: DEEZ NUTS
Hector: Dammit Kid, this thing buzzed so loud I almost dropped my fuckin croissant
Anna: It's like the inn gives you bottled water to pay for and it's like there's free fuckin water in the tap you asshole
Reinhardt: I AM THE TIER DESTROYER DESTROYER OF THE TIERS
Berkut: THE META QUIVERS BEFORE HIM
Reinhardt: @Yune @Every Green Unit FUCK OFF
Frederick: Why aren't the dishes in alphabetical order?
Shade: The fuk does that even mean?
Leon: @everyone Move I'm gay. I've got rights to be the first 5*+10
Arvis: My hair is red
Arvis: Sigurd's is blue
Arvis: Why did you leave me @Azel
Arvis: What did I do?
Henry: I have taught a bunch of animatronic snowmen how to chant Hail Grima
Henry: Today is a good day
Berkut: SO YOUR THE ASSHOLE
Ryoma: So both Corrins spilt an entire gallon's worth of Listerine on themselves
Anthony: And that is my problem how????
Alfonse: So we're passing notes during the war meetings huh?
Alfonse: @Shade read what you've been passing or I'm sending you to deal with Niles' bullshit
Shade: Why's @Gustav's and @Alfonse's dicks hanging on the floor?
Alfonse: What the actual fuck
Alfonse: Why the fuck do I hear talking during the war meetings?
Shade: U got ears u dumb fuck
Anthony: @Lukas @Sigurd @Arvis @Quan @Eldigan @Finn @Eliwood @Hector @Bartre @Canas @Dorcas @Seth @Greil @Chrom @Frederick @Lon'qu @Xander @Ryoma @Reinhardt
Chrom: DO ANY OF US LOOK LIKE YOUR FUCKIN DAD
Alm: He can't help he has no father figure in his life!
Zelgius: Pass the popcorn
Michiah: This is a funeral
Zelgius: THIS MOVIE SUCKS ASS!
Fernand: @Arvis' mac and cheese sounds like my wet dream of a threesome involving me Mathilda and Clive
Rinea: @Berkut and this is the man you chose for your vassal?
Wrys: I fear I am the only normal one left in this chat room
Chapter 30: The One with The Shitty Feh channel
Everything said here is and was 100% my live reactions
Shade: @Feh Your doing amazing sweetie but we've gotta find better updates
Shade: Pair Up just made Reinhardt nuking things much easier
Shade: And no one's gonna care about Aether Resort or Allegiance battles. We want orbs.
Shade: Also the fuck is up with demoting people I get sick of as 4* into 3*, they'll be more common.
Ike: And the 5* from before Frozen 2 won't be summonable
Ike: The fuck. I want to fuck people's rates up
Lyn: Dude Same
Julia: Already pulled it on Shade
Azura: Did it to Shade numerous times
Anthony: And i'm still not summonable ;-;
Anthony: I just want snuggles from more summoners
Chapter 31: The One Where I want to adopt seliph
Private Chat (Sigurd+Seliph)
Seliph: Dad... I need advice
Seliph: See, I'm kind of having one of those they/them days, and Leif kept saying that nonbinary people are a phase and that I need to grow out of it since I'm the future of Judgral...
Seliph: What do I do
Sigurd: eye emoji gun emoji
Sigurd: Quan's in so much trouble
Private Chat (Sigurd+Quan)
Sigurd has sent screenshot.1.jpg
Sigurd: Mind explaining this?
Sigurd: I won't hesitate eye emoji gun emoji
Quan: The fuck?
Private Chat (Quan, Ethlyn and Finn)
Quan has sent screenshot.1.3.jpg
Quan: The fuck is this?
Quan: @Finn what was Lief taught
Quan: I'm holding you responsible since I got stabbed
Finn: I told him everyone is a queen sir!
Ethlyn: Dude you should just see the chat Lief is in right now. He's not going to need a colostomy bag by the time Reinhardt's done with him...
Private Chat (Reinhardt, Lukas, Boey, Lucius, Alm and Leif)
Reinhardt: @Leif What did we tell you about being NBphobic?
Reinhardt: And homophobic for that matter?
Leif: Shut up you useless pan pizza. Isn't that just being bi, which is also just being gay?
Lukas: I sense a disturbance in the force.
Reinhardt: What the fuck did you just fucking say to me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Friegian Army, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on the Loptyrians along with your home country, and I have over 9000 confirmed kills. I am trained in magical warfare and I’m the top mage knight in the entire Friege Army. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to Seliph about nonbinary people not being valid? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting the Gelben Ritter across the rift and your location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Order of Heroes and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kid.
Alm: EVERYONE IS A QUEEN LEIF!
Lucius: I'm a healer but. ^-^_/
Chapter 32: The One with Ike Owing Haar $5
As of me writing this, Haar is 5* level 15. It is the day he released.
RADiant Hero has added HakunaMatata, Nottafurfag, Catwoman, Mordecai and I'm Too Old for this Shit to the chat!
RADiant Hero: Mist's gay Haar
RADiant Hero: This girl named Lene.
Lethe: What's the point of this?
Ranulf: Does it look like I know?
Caineghis has changed his name to Simba
Ranulf: At least I don't have to explain this to his royal furry king
Shade: Ike, I just realized we need an update to the text to speech mod.
RADiant Hero: Y
Shade: Mordecai can't read. I'm pretty sure he only understands ancient tounge.
Haar: Why does this thing keep waking me up?
Haar: And it's not the chat.
Haar: It's some tiny gremlin.
RADiant Hero: What does it look like?
Haar has sent getthislittleshitoffofmebeforeikillhim.png
RADiant Hero: That's Anthony. He won't do much harm. He's probably trying to scout you out. He always does it to the new heroes
Haar: But he's interrupting my nap.
Shade: According to Lene you got a full 45 minutes on the battlefield and only woke up when Lucius almost had to knock you conscious to not die
Haar: Hell yeah! Nothing in my life matters!
Mist: And here we see a Gen Z stuck in a Millenial's body.
Chapter 33: The Adventures of a Little Gremlin
This is Anthony the chapter.
Ranulf: @RADiant Hero
Ranulf: Pls help
Ranulf: There's a kid who won't stop playing with my ears and tail.
RADiant Hero: That's Anthony
RADiant Hero: He's the least of your worries considering Alm's, Celica's and Rinea's cat obsession.
Oscar: So I finally got Anthony to eat his vegetables without getting threatened by a lobster
Sakura: But Ryoma wants nothing to do with him.
Berkut: I'm sorry for being an ancestor to that Walmart. Anyways how did you get him to eat his vegetables?
Oscar: The fact you can put cheese on anything.
Berkut: Ok so why is Shade smothered in cheese sauce.
Shade: Pretzel Pizza is a fail so i did the next best thing ;-;
Camilla: Who ate all of the cookies?
Camilla: I didn't see him in the kitchen
Anthony: That's the joke. No one ever sees him.
Lucius: So I asked Anthony what his favorite part of the book is.
Lucius: He said the part when Gollum fell into the lava with the ring
Lucius: Never trusting Azama with his religious teachings again
Anthony: I accidentally spilled ice cream on Baby Lucina and long story short Chrom saw me lick the baby
Anthony: @Reinhardt help pls
Anthony: Mia isn't the fastest hero
Anthony: That would be Reinhardt when he hears that I've gotten myself into more trouble than I should for a 13 yr old.
Titania: We are no longer having glitter in the order
Titania: Anthony keeps spreading it to places there shouldn't be glitter
Anthony: The can opener is broken. Incineroar keeps wanting tuna
Shade: Then it's a Can't opener?
Berkut: So Alm dropped a chicken nugget on the floor, offered it to Anthony
Berkut: He said no, Alm then offered it to Ike
Berkut: Then Shade ran off of it like she stole the fucking hope diamond.
Hector: @Anthony we told you to stay in bed at these hours. Quit spookin us!
Anthony: But I keep seeing scary things!
Hector: Scarier than a pissed off me?
Anthony: Yes! Valter and Oliver having s-e-x!
Hector: OH SHIT
Alfonse: Why is Anthony's bed in my room?
Alfonse: And why does he have a race car bed?
Shade: Temporary moving arrangements. He keeps seeing Valter and Oliver buttfucking. It's why he kept getting out of bed.
Shade: Anthony called Ranch "Salad Frosting" on accident and now I can't stop thinking about it.
Shade: Ok Lucius wanted it quiet so he could say grace
Shade: And Anthony starts fucking howling like a dog, and then gets Naiahlah in on it.
Shade: Folks, we either have an immortal or he worships a different god than us.
Shade: Nino wants to be a sage to help people like Lloyd and Linus did
Shade: Anthony just wants to hide under couch cushions and poke people with needles
Shade: Welcome to Askr!
Chapter 34: The One With Homestuck
Happy 4/13 ya Homefucks
Calliope: Who changed the names?
Calliope: And why can't we change them back?
Equius Zahhak: D-> and what's up with this ST00PID typing quirk
Kanaya Maryam: So Let's Figure Out Who's Who.
Kanaya Maryam: This is Lukas
Karkat Vantas: BERKUT
Karkat Vantas: OK WHY THE FUCK CAN'T I TURN OFF CAPS LOCK!?
Calliope: Anthony ^-^
Andrew Hussie: Shade
Andrew Hussie: Ok what the actual fuck
Damara Megido: マース
Damara Megido: 誰もが実際にこれを読むことができるのを待つか、これはほんの少し日本語に翻訳されていますか。
Damara Megido: そうでなければ、葉はこの惑星に住むに値しないクソ女です
John Egbert: Marth no!
John Egbert: Also this is Seliph
Equius Zahhak: D--> Reinhardt
Aradia Megido: eir
Dave Strider: lucina
Bro: I don't think for the sake of Eir's life I should reveal myself
Bro: But @Lord English is Lyon
Lord English: PISS OFF SAMUEL
Lord English: 4/13 ONLY HAPPENS ONCE A YEAR
Andrew Hussie: So I'm guessing this'll happen when 6/12 rolls around?
I did so much fucking checking if I got the quirks right. I don't think I did the Dave/Bro/Dark Lord Hussie quirks right.
Chapter 35: The One with the Phantom Theives
Happy birthday for Matthew (my hc) and happy smash day Phantom Thieves!
Matthew has added Joker to the chat!
Jakob: Oh hell no.
Matthew: So kid, do you have a name or do we just call ya Joker
Joker: Well... The most common name the games have me under is Ren Amamiya but I also go under Akira Kurusu.
Shade: Smash newb?
Shade: Good luck kid. This is the game where everyone dies.
???: Doesn't everybody?
Shade: @Eir your weird ass friend's here.
Eir: That's not mine though... Mine was Haar...
Shade: So what the fuck.
Chapter 36: The One Where I nearly Scream at Midnight
Berkut: Someone translate that
Berkut: And that
???: *earrape screeching*
Berkut: Not that
Ike: Genny, Lukas and Felicia got alts for the new banner. Also if played correctly, Lukas get's like +20 defense on foe turns.