Regina never liked Bill Murray. Well, she never liked him as an actor. She didn’t know the man personally, of course, so she couldn’t speak to whether she’d like the person or not. However, as an actor, she found his choice of roles juvenile, moronic, and irritating. His choice of comedy styling was somewhere between a 10 year old boy’s humor and someone with the mental capacity of a turnip.
To put it quite simply, she felt Bill Murray was an idiot, in an artistic sense.
When Henry was around 4 years old, he discovered Bill Murray, much to Regina’s annoyance, and he began to go through the man’s entire repertoire of movies. She managed to filter out the R rated movies, but that didn’t save her from having to listen to everything else, and, it was during this phase of Henry’s obsessive entertainment needs that he decided ‘Groundhog Day’ was his new very favorite movie ever.
This, of course, meant that, by the time her son moved on to his next obsessive thing, she knew every line of the movie by heart, much to her aggravation.
It came to a point where, instead of thinking about what might be happening on the screen, Regina began to consider the logistics of the main character’s situation. After all, she was stuck in a similar situation, and, despite it being Bill Murray, it was nice to have some character somewhere to which she could relate. She managed to figure out that he was probably stuck in the same day for about 34 years based on his skills by the end of the movie, which seemed like a fairly short amount of time compared to her situation in which she would be stuck for all eternity with no real way out.
Her sympathy of the character’s plight was a bit on the low side.
However, she did take a few things to heart the movie showcased Phil doing over those years. He learned some very handy life skills, and, she reasoned, she could do the same. Based on what she knew of the curse, the town was going to live through the same weekly routines for eternity, so why shouldn’t she learn some new skills? She’d already learned how to cook. How hard would it be to take up something else?
She’d always wanted to learn to play piano. She had started learning as a young girl, but her marriage had cut that education a bit short. It couldn’t hurt for her to learn a new language. It would be good for Henry to learn one, too, and they could learn together. She’d been wanting some decent apple cider, but there was none in the town. She had the tree. Why not make some herself?
There were so many things she could learn or at which she could become better. Being mayor of a town that didn’t change and had an exacting equilibrium which meant it required no attention to run whatsoever, which freed up a great deal of her time, and, now that Henry didn’t need diaper changes, it seemed like a great time to take a cue from that idiotic film and learn a few things.
What could it hurt?
The film also made her appreciate that she wasn’t actually reliving the exact same day over and over again. It was more she was living in a very extreme rut of the same routines. The very idea of waking up to ‘I’ve Got You Babe’ for 34 years in a row became one of many things she put on her mental list of ‘own personal hell,’ along with being friends with Snow White, having sex with Whale, and spending longer than a few minutes in the same room with Gold.
Of course, that list change significantly after Emma Swan arrived, and Regina’s personal Groundhog Day situation ceased to exist.
No longer did she have a routine at all. Instead, she found herself going from one emergency, life threatening situation to another. What she wouldn't give for just a few weeks of her old, boring routine. Her life was becoming more ridiculous than anything she could have made up on her own. For example, in the course of less than a week’s time, she’d been nearly tortured to death, saved Storybrooke from destruction via a trigger she’d created, left through a portal to Neverland, fought Pan’s Lost Boys, retrieved her son, gone back to Storybrooke, fought Pan again, and then destroyed her original curse which reset everything and forced her to say goodbye to her son forever.
Who has weeks like that?
Apparently, she did.
After all of that, she’d found herself without a memory of an entire year and back in Storybrooke, so, to her, that rounded out her week, which, she mused to herself, sounded about right for how life rolled along these days.
Of course, it took Emma Swan’s arrival to change her situation yet again, and, in less than four days’ time, Regina found she had an older half-sister, Gold was still alive, her soul mate was Robin Hood, her mother had lied to her for her entire life, she fought Zelena and was nearly killed, she broke a curse and defeated her sister using light magic, and then lost her soul mate because of Emma Swan’s incompetence.
Far be it for major happenings in her life to go on over the course of a month or more. No, of course not. The saying was, “When it rains, it pours,” and that seemed to be fully accurate.
With a heavy sigh, Regina downed the rest of her cider and walked over the dry bar to pour another glass. She plopped down on her sofa and resumed watching ‘Groundhog Day,’ not really paying attention to the movie. She let her mind wander over what her life had become.
Somewhere in the universe some higher powered being had decided she was going to be the whipping boy for every bad thing to happen to a person ever, and she was getting tired of taking the licks. Every single time something great happened in her life, it was ripped away from her within days, literally days, of the happening.
Villains don’t get happy endings, they tell her. Really? Gold not only has his true love, but is married to her. That filthy pirate somehow managed to wear idiot Charming number 3 down enough to give in to his misogynic advances. They got happy endings, and what did she get? She got a decent apple cider and ‘Groundhog Day.’ That’s what she got.
They received acceptance and love because they somehow redeemed themselves, and she was given a swift kick by whatever force in the universe decided to hate her to an extreme measure.
She swirled the cider around in the crystal glass in her hand and snorted. She let her mind trail off into a lovely buzz of nothing as she watched Phil take the groundhog on a joy ride. A random thought occurred to her. Maybe she should just leave town? What could it hurt? There wasn’t much keeping her here except Henry, but he could leave town and come visit her. Maybe Miss Swan would hand over her apartment in New York? It was the least she could do after bringing Marian back from the great beyond to steal Robin away.
She shook her head. No, not steal. Marian was Robin’s wife, and, in all fairness, Regina, as the Evil Queen, had ordered the woman’s execution. She couldn’t really be mad at either Robin nor Marian for being together.
She could, however, be angry at Emma Swan for bringing Marian back and changing the timeline. That she was perfectly in her rights to do, and she was taking full advantage of it. She took another sip of cider, watching Phil work on his piano skills. She could probably find a job in a political office in New York. She had enough skills, and she’d spent years learning the laws of this realm. She had plenty of money, enough to probably last the rest of her lifetime, such as it was. It wouldn’t take much to leave.
She could pack up and be out of town within the week. Of course, getting a moving truck to move…
She sat up in her chair, startled by another thought. She couldn’t leave town. If she did, she’d lose all her memories because, this time, she hadn’t been the one to cast the curse. She was stuck here just like everyone else, and, unlike everyone else, she didn’t have a second identity. If she passed over the town line, there’s no telling what would happen. She could potentially be a completely blank slate, or she could revert to some younger version of herself, or she could have some other personality that the curse did create but was lost because of how the curse was implemented. Who knows?
Flipping the television off, she walked back to her dry bar and poured her fourth glass for the night as she mulled it over. If she crossed the line, it would erase everything… everything. She shook her head and frowned. It would erase Henry, and she didn’t want to give him up. He was everything, but, then again, he wouldn’t be around forever. He had his own life to live, and maybe he’d be better without her? Maybe it would be better if she wasn’t there with the massive amount of emotional baggage she carried with her?
Maybe… maybe she could keep Henry and get rid of everything else. What she needed to do was be very prepared.
With a nod to herself, she downed her glass and put it away before heading upstairs to prepare. This was going to take her some time to get right, and she didn’t want to miss any detail. It could mean the difference between losing everything but Henry and losing everything.