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Moonlight Sonata

Chapter Text

Jimin absentmindedly doodled in his notebook as he waited for his friends to arrive. A few curious glances and hushed whispers didn't go unnoticed by him. It should have irked him. But sixteen (almost seventeen) years of practicing a neutral expression in public had taught him well.

Sure he was the Kim Jimin. Youngest son of the Jeon Jungkook and the Kim Seokjin, retired K-Pop idol and Korea's favorite actor. Brother of the Kim Hoseok, famous underground rapper.

But Kim Jimin was also a human and the whispers of his peers made him insecure.

In the middle of the winter his parents decided to leave the Busan sea and return to the Seoul city life. The salty taste of the fresh air changed to a muggy thicker one in his mouth. But as much as he hated Seoul, he couldn't be selfish. Because his father had just gotten signed to an entertainment company to help train the newest boy group. And his other father decided to open up an acting school. The move wasn't very difficult. The amount of people Jimin would miss he could count on one hand. For being the son of infamous celebrities, no one wanted to be friends. Most of them were presumptuous that Jimin was a spoiled rich brat who had everything handed to him. And while his parents dressed him in lavish clothing and bought him all the new models of all the technology. But he didn't see it that way. You can't choose the family you were born into.

More times often than not, Jimin found himself wondering why his parents couldn't just stay retired.

"Hey Jimin." Yugyeom side hugged him as he took a seat side him and pulling Jimin out of his thoughts. "It's been two weeks already and people are still gossiping."

"I'm used to it." Jimin shrugged. And sure he was used to it. But he shouldn't have to be.

He looked around the table at the smiling faces of Jaehyun, Yugyeom, and BamBam. Some how he managed to squeeze his way into their little trio. They accepted him with open arms. Because that's the type of people they were. Good. Jimin knew these boys were honest and caring. Not because he was a celebrity. But because they recognized him for what he was. Human.

"So I completely failed my English test." BamBam sighed dramatically as he absentmindedly chewed on some grapes. His mouth puckered up in a little pout. "I'm an idiot."

"You are not." Jimin fiercely told him after drinking some of his favorite banana milk. "Bam this is one test out of the many you're going to have. You fail today. You study harder tomorrow and ace the next one."

"Thanks Minnie. You always know what to say." BamBam smiled, looking more enthusiastic to eat.

Jimin was about to continue to go on a rant about the corrupt education system of South Korea when a deep voice interrupted him.

A tall older boy stood at the side of their table. The first thing Jimin noticed was his eyes. They were a light brown color where everyone else had deep almost black eyes. His hair was a little long and needed a trim. But unlike everyone in Seoul who bleached their hair, this boy stayed his natural black color. Jimin's favorite part was the deep twin dimples on his cheeks. All in all the boy was pretty decent looking. He was in no way unattractive. Just average looking. But Jimin found that charming.

He recognized him from his English class. His name was Namjoon and he didn't speak much. Jimin had even once thought he didn't know Korean. But he came to learn that Namjoon was repeating the class. He was probably bored out of his mind sitting in a classroom of juniors.

"I saw you guys looking sad." The boy smiled. "Can I show you a magic trick to cheer you up?"

And Jimin replied yes, not knowing that one simple word would change his life.

Chapter Text

Although Jimin was having such a hard time at school, one thing that was always constant was his family. His parents were completely infatuated with each other. Sometimes it was cute. Sometimes it made him gag. But Jimin would proudly tell anyone that Jeon Jungkook was crazily in love with Kim Seokjin. And vice versa.

And although there was a few behavioral problems with his Hoseok hyung in the past. It was nothing he grew out of. Hoseok was the best older brother Jimin could have asked for. He listened, gave great advice, and talked to Jimin as if he was a young adult. Which was highly appreciated. Sometimes his older brother was fiercely protective which landed him in trouble often. Hoseok, in their childhood, tended to talk more with his fists than mouth. And if needed, Jimin would beat someone down for even looking at his hyung the wrong way. But he knew that even if the entire world was against him, Hoseok would stay by his side.

Currently he had climbed into his bed and inhaled his hyung's lavender scent. Their parents were out on date night and probably wouldn't return until the morning hours. Hoseok typed away on his laptop. The elder had been working on his mixtape nonstop. The entire family was concerned about his work habits but Hoseok just laughed it off and told them he inherited their parents diligence and perfectionism.

"Jimin baby can you take out the red shoebox from my closet?" Jimin grinned and happily retrieved the shoebox. This was his favorite thing to do with his brother when their parents were out and the maids were asleep.

Hoseok, after saving his current draft, made his way to the bed and watched as Jimin grind enough weed for a blunt. His hyung rolled the blunt and Jimin watched with amazement. He still hadn't quite mastered the art of rolling but who needed to when you have an older brother to do it for you? Hoseok and Jimin loved to smoke together. After a fat blunt they'd eat their weight in cake and cuddle up in Hoseok's bed. When they first started their little hobby together, Hoseok made Jimin promise him three things.

One, he could only smoke three times a week.

Hoseok didn't want Jimin to start depending on weed.

Two, never to smoke without him.

It wasn't a selfish thing. Hoseok was protective over his little brother and didn't want him to get too involved with drugs.

Three, don't hang out with drug dealers.

If Jimin ever needed weed, he'd ask Hoseok. And if Hoseok wasn't around, Jimin would have to wait. Drug dealers only brought trouble.

"People still giving you trouble?" Hoseok questioned as he passed Jimin the blunt and went to open his window to let the cool air slip in.

"Not really. They just stare and whisper." Jimin shrugged and followed Hoseok towards the window so he could see the moon. His favorite person. "Even though I made friends...I still hate it here hyung."

"I understand baby. It was easy for me to move because I'm not tied down to any companies. But you left your whole life in Busan." Hoseok wrapped his left arm around Jimin's shoulder. Jimin passed the blunt back to him and Hoseok took a puff before continuing. "I was considering getting my own place but I threw that idea away when I realized I'd be away from you."

"Hyung don't-" Jimin began to complain but Hoseok cut him off by blowing smoke in his face.

"In this fucked up world Jimin, you're the person I love the most. Hell probably even more than our own parents." Hoseok chuckled and kissed the side of Jimin's head. "Although I was young, I remember when you were born. We lived here in Seoul back then. Papa was out with a few colleagues and Daddy gave birth on his own. You were an impatient little fucker. Daddy passed out from exhaustion and the maids were trying to clean you up and calm you down. Everyone tried but Jimin you really had powerful lungs."

Jimin could feel the high settling in. His mind wandered to his birth and felt bad for being an impatient baby. Hoseok was there to witness it all though.

"Finally the maids handed you to me. And the moment we looked at each other, you stopped crying. I made a promise then and there that I would never let anything hurt you. You're my world." Jimin could feel his eyes welling up with tears. He leaned into his hyung's embrace and inhaled the smell of his lavender and coffee scent. "Hyung will give up everything for you Jimin."

That night Jimin fell asleep, curled up next to his big brother knowing that as long as he had Hoseok, nothing and no one could hurt him.

English class dragged on but Jimin didn't mind. Mr. Lee was one of the best teachers he had ever met. The lessons were entertaining and the teacher possessed a young soul. After finishing classwork they were even allowed to play on their phones.

Jimin quickly finished his classwork and homework as Mr. Lee graded papers. English was easy for him which meant that he could slack off in this class and still maintain the best grade. Jimin always strove to have the highest grades in his classes. It was a bad habit he couldn't shake off. But in this class, Jimin and Namjoon were always tied for the highest grade. It irked him.

As he pretended to play on his phone he observed Kim Namjoon. The senior was focused on his phone, typing furiously with an angered look on his face. Jimin felt bad for whoever was on the other side of that conversation because Namjoon looked terrifying when angered. His phone vibrated, pulling him out of his thoughts.

Hyungie <3: Hey kiddo. I'm close to your school so I can pick you up after lunch and you can ditch your last two classes.

Jimin thanked whatever deity was up there before responding.

Jimin: Id love that! Can we get smoke and get greasy burgers?

Hyungie <3: Sure! Also Daddy wants to know what you want for dinner.

Jimin: Chinese food!

Hyungie <3: You can't have fast food two times in a row!

Jimin: Yes I can :)

"Kim Namjoon. Kim Jimin. Since you two look bored, do me a favor and clear the board." Mr. Lee suggested and gestured to the whiteboard which was filled with lessons. Jimin quickly got up with a smile on his face, still excited over ditching theater and pottery class. Namjoon finished angrily texting and stood up as well.

In his two weeks of going to this school, Jimin realized that Namjoon never stared at him. He never whispered about him. Never even gave him any sort of acknowledgement. It annoyed Jimin just as much as it pleased him. Namjoon didn't care about his money or fame. But he didn't even look at him either.

Jimin decided to clean the left side which left Namjoon to the right. He sprayed both their parts with cleaner and the two began to work in silence as the rest of the class hurried to finish their assignments. Jimin's mind tried to remember any time he acknowledged Namjoon's existence before but couldn't come up with anything. The boy was easily passable and his quietness in class added on to the fact that Jimin never bothered to look at him.

The bottom half was clean which left the top half. Jimin stood on his tip toes but he still couldn't reach the very top of the board. His lips formed into a little pout that resembled a baby duckling. He swore under his breath in frustration. A chuckle took his attention away from cleaning.

Namjoon easily took his own rag and cleaned the rest of Jimin's part. Those dimples were on display again and Jimin tried so hard to resist touching them.

"Tiny." Was all Namjoon whispered to him before heading back to his seat.

The four friends sat in a section of the cafeteria reserved for only seniors. It was rumored that if you were a junior caught in the section, you'd get publicly kicked out. But no one had ever said anything to the four juniors who invaded their space. Jimin finished up another diary entry as his friends arrived at the table. BamBam looked much brighter and happier than yesterday.

"The teacher is allowing retakes!" BamBam grinned so wide Jimin thought his face would split in half.

As much as Jimin liked his new friends, he could tell their friendship wouldn't last after graduation. After all, he wanted to go home to Busan. And although Yugyeom, BamBam, and Jaehyun took him in, he wasn't like them. Of course he cared about his grades. But that was all the trio ever talked about. School and grades. It made Jimin wonder if they had any hobbies outside of school.

As he drowned out BamBam, a peculiar scene caught his attention.

Namjoon sat down beside another senior. His eyes glanced around, making sure no teachers were watching before pulling out a clear bag from his pocket and passing it to the boy next to him. Jimin watched intensely as the boy analyzed the weed in the bag and shook his head, passing it back to Namjoon. The two exchanged some sort of weird handshake before Namjoon got up and moved to another table.

Jimin wasn't sure what prompted him to make his next move but his mouth acted faster than his brain.

"Bam can you get that guy's attention? The one standing up with the white t-shirt." Jimin quickly interrupted his friend's talk about an upcoming assignment. BamBam turned around as he was closest to Namjoon and called out.

"Kim Namjoon sunbae!"

Namjoon quickly turned around, looking for who called his name. BamBam waved and watched as the long legged boy made his way towards them. After coming to a stop at their lunch table, BamBam pointed to Jimin.

Jimin's heart seemed to do a backflip as the boy took a seat beside him. His friends, after a few curious glances, decided Namjoon wasn't interesting enough and went back to talking about school. As he faced Namjoon, Jimin almost forgot how to breathe.

Kim Namjoon wasn't a pretty boy. He didn't have the signature perfect bowl cut hair or white skin that every boy in Seoul wanted. He didn't have a face that people would look twice at. But Jimin thought he was handsome in a way that messy paintings were still considered masterpieces.

"You sell?" Jimin asked in a light musical voice, as if he was just coming out of a trance.

"Yeah." Namjoon grinned widely. His eyes sparkled with what seemed like a million galaxies inside them. Jimin found himself smiling only for the reason that Namjoon was too. "I'm trying to get rid of what I have right now so it's only five for a gram. I have other stuff too."

Jimin could already imagine his hyung being pissed that he had broken one rule. Behind those dimples and sharp eyes, Namjoon was still a drug dealer.

"Just the weed." Jimin shook his head. And then eyed Namjoon suspiciously. "Five for a gram? What's the catch?"

"No catch." Namjoon shook his head. Jimin was close enough to notice hidden freckles on his tan complexion. "I just think you're pretty."

Jimin felt his face heat up. He smiled at the boy. No one had ever complimented him so upfront. Everyone was too scared.

"Oh thank you." He ducked his head down and reached in his pocket to hand over a five thousand won bill. Jimin didn't need to look at the weed. He was much more interested in the boy sitting next to him.

"Don't you want to look at it first?" Namjoon scrunched his eyebrows at Jimin's naivety. How could he trust a drug dealer so easily?

"No." Jimin answered. He felt as if he had no control over himself now. Every action was taken over by his sudden interest in Namjoon. "I'm kind of desperate and I don't know anyone else."

"Well anytime you need weed you can come to me okay?" Namjoon grinned and handed over the plastic bag discretely, which was difficult in a crowded lunchroom. Jimin jumped slightly as a large hand dragged along his thigh. Out of the corner of his eye he watched to see if his friends were noticing what was going on beneath the table. They didn't. His breathing quickened as did his pulse. It felt as if the air had thickened in those few seconds.

The hand moved closer and closer to his inner thigh. A few inches away from his center. Underneath the wandering hand, he felt the package. Jimin slipped his hand beneath the table, and received the weed from Namjoon's own one. The dealer took his sweet time removing his hand from Jimin's thigh.

"Jimin?" Namjoon suddenly said his name and Jimin decided he wanted to hear it more often.

"Yes Namjoon?" He responded, loving the way the name rolled off his tongue.

"Don't buy weed from anyone else in this school. Any one of them would go straight to the media about this." Namjoon informed him with a serious look on his face. Jimin didn't know why, but he trusted that Namjoon wouldn't sell him out. "Do you want my number for whenever you need anything?"

Jimin found himself handing over his phone faster than he could reply. He watched as Namjoon's long fingers typed away on his screen. How there were pink spots on his fingers, probably from his lighter.

"Thank you." Jimin muttered, taking his phone back.

"No problem." Namjoon smiled at him once more and patted his knee. Jimin gazed at how the tall senior walked away towards his friends. How he seemed to know everyone but at the same time kept to himself. How all their surroundings seemed to fade back into reality as Namjoon left. Almost as if they had been trapped in that moment of exchange.

Jimin realized something at that moment. Something that made him tremble in fear but made him smile just as well. He didn't buy weed from Namjoon because he needed it.

He bought weed from Namjoon because he wanted to talk to him.

Later that night Jimin was working on homework. He searched his bag for a highlighter but instead found a five thousand won note tucked into the side pocket. The sides of his mouth tilted up into a smile.

Chapter Text

It was a week later when Jimin realized he still had Namjoon's weed in his backpack. His car was still in the workshop and had been relying on Hoseok for rides to and from school. But Hoseok was in a meeting this morning and Seokjin was the only person who could take him to school.

"Do you smell something weird my love?" His Daddy asked him. Jimin was suddenly conscious of the stale weed buried underneath his books.

"Hyung bought me a new cologne." Jimin answered swiftly, mentally congratulating himself for being such a quick thinker.

"Hmm." Seokjin hummed as he pulled up into the parking lot of the school. "Give me a kiss before you go."

Jimin grinned. Unlike most kids his age, he didn't feel embarrassed to show affection towards his parents. However, when someone pointed out the Kim Seokjin in their school parking lot, everything became hectic and Jimin's smile fell from his face. Students crowded the vehicle like a mob with their cellphones recording the scene. Camera flashes lit up the the darkness of the dawn. It should have been terrifying. But this happened every time Kim Seokjin was spotted in public regardless if he was with his family.

Jimin, despite being uncomfortable, leaned over and pressed his lips to his father's cheeks.

"I'm sorry Minnie." Seokjin frowned and gestured to his fans.

"It's okay." Jimin lied.

No one noticed when he headed to the direction of the baseball field instead of the school. The bleachers were still ice cold and wet with morning snow. Using his sleeve, Jimin wiped away a small section of space to sit down on.

His fingers shook as he searched his bag for the weed. It was at the bottom, squished by the weight of his multiple schoolbooks. It was only then that he realized he had neither a lighter or anything to smoke out of. Jimin sighed, his warm breath turning white in the freezing winter air. Looks like his plan of smoking before class was ruined. Jimin didn't necessarily want to be high. He wanted to forget. He wanted to pretend that he wasn't Kim Jimin. That his Daddy wasn't world famous actor Kim Seokjin. That he was a regular high school student who just got dropped off by his regular father who worked a regular nine to five job. 

"Dilemma?" A voice called out from behind him. A girl with short hair and a smirk on her face climbed up the bleachers to get to Jimin. She was gorgeous with honey skin and hair that was an odd mixture of pink and yellow lemonade colors. The girl could have been a model due to her extremely long legs and sculpted face. He recognized her from a few classes they had in common. They never spoke though because she often sat in the back corners. Jimin nodded at her question. "I'm Taehyung."

"Jimin." He responded with a wave. "You wouldn't happen to have a lighter and rolling paper would you?"

"I don't." She shook her head. Her lips tilted upwards in a delicate but mischievous smile. "I have a pipe and a lighter though."

They say that you learned a lot about people when you smoke with them. That was true. In under thirty minutes Jimin learned that Taehyung was a junior like him. That she was a bit of an outcast. She loved photography and art. And that she had a knack for getting in trouble. Taehyung was by far the second most interesting person that Jimin had met at his new school. The first place was held by a certain someone with light brown eyes and dimples.

"You should be careful." Taehyung coughed and politely covered her mouth after passing the pipe to Jimin. He fired the bowl of weed up and inhaled sharply. "I know a lot of people at this school who would go to the public about you smoking weed."

"Yeah my dealer," It was weird to call Namjoon that. "warned me as well. I'll be careful."

"Who's your dealer?" Taehyung shook her head as Jimin offered her the pipe to finish off the rest of the weed. She was still coughing a bit and Jimin could hear her voice becoming raspy.

"Kim Namjoon." Jimin answered before hitting the last of the weed. Taehyung hummed in response. "You know him?"

"Not well. I don't really know anyone here. But he's always been nice to me." Taehyung answered. "Anyways you're probably too high to have noticed but class started ten minutes ago."

Jimin's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. He hadn't skipped a single class since he was a freshman. His parents let him off with a warning saying that it was typical high school freshman behavior. If they found out he was late, they'd definitely punish him. But Jimin wasn't afraid of his parents as much as he was afraid of Hoseok. His hyung, although goofy and laid back as he was, hated when Jimin did anything to jeopardize his education. If there was one thing worse than disappointing Kim Seokjin and Jeon Jungkook, it was disappointing Kim Hoseok.

Maybe it was the weed talking, but Jimin didn't care if he missed one class. It was history and he excelled at the subject. So much to the point where his teacher told him he didn't belong in a regular history class. He offered to bump him up to advanced placement but Jimin declined. That would have caused even more gossip around school that the teachers favored him.

"What should we do?" Jimin pondered, looking towards Taehyung to answer. "I can afford to skip history. We can smoke the rest of my weed."

"I can skip my math class. There was a huge project and I didn't do it." Taehyung giggled, her eyes red and shiny from the effects of the weed. "How about we smoke a little more, listen to music, then go to chem together."

"Sounds like a plan." Jimin grinned and reached in his bag for more weed. "We could come here during lunch as well and smoke again."

"Kim Jimin..." Taehyung grinned. And for the first time Jimin noticed that she had a rectangular sort of smile that was pure sunshine and rainbows. "I think we're going to be good friends."

Yugyeom: Hey. Where are you?

Jimin: Skipping lunch. Gotta study!

Yugyeom: Eat a snack! Study hard!

Jimin: Will do!

"You know what's weird?" Taehyung asked him later that day as they snuck away from the lunchroom and made their way to the baseball fields.

"What?" Jimin responded, kicking a rock out of his way. His eyes were glued to the ground, lost in thought.

"I thought about you all day. Even in chemistry. No one ever sat next to me before in that class. But you did today." Taehyung admitted. Unlike Jimin, her eyes were focused on the blue cotton candy sky above. "And then in English class you moved your seat next to mine."

Jimin felt his face heat up. He didn't even think about how those small acts could make Taehyung happy. And if just being in her presence made Taehyung smile, then Jimin would do it every day. He didn't know Taehyung yet. But he knew that she deserved a friend.

"Taehyung. You and I are friends okay? Hell, I like you more than the people I have lunch with. You're probably my favorite person at this school and not just because we shared a pipe this morning." Jimin linked his short arm with Taehyung's long lanky one. "Girl, boy, non binary. Everyone deserves a friend."

"Thank you." Taehyung whispered.

Jimin and Taehyung spent the majority of chemistry, homeroom, and English class talking and getting to know each other. They both recently moved to Seoul, Taehyung coming from Daegu. Taehyung had a boyfriend back from her hometown who she absolutely gushed about. And she even loved to dance just like Jimin.

As they climbed up the bleachers, they watched around, making sure there were no wandering security officers that would escort them back to the lunchroom.

"So I gave him a blowjob and he just ended up getting softer." Taehyung chuckled as Jimin prepared the pipe. He learned that she had little to no filter and was definitely more experienced than him. Jimin hadn't even had his first kiss yet.

"From all the fanfictions I've read, that doesn't usually happen." Jimin answered. "Maybe your boyfriend just doesn't like sex."

"Maybe. But it kinda hurts. Imagine getting all prepared to lose your virginity and then it...just doesn't happen." Taehyung pouted. Jimin decided that she deserved the first hit more just for that. "Are you a virgin too?"

"Yeah." Jimin nodded and passed the pipe that was stuffed with weed. "I've never done anything actually."

Taehyung took her first hit and her eyes fluttered close. Jimin could physically see her body relax, muscles becoming less stiff. He smiled a little knowing that he helped her in some sort of way.

"Why not?" She pondered out loud before taking her second hit.

That made Jimin think. There were a few boys here and there that caught his attention a few times but it never lasted. Most of them were dull with little to no personality. And it was the same for the boys in Seoul. His friends only talked about studying and the rest of the male population were spoiled rich kids. Jimin was definitely the type to fall in love first before anything sexual happened. And so far no one came close.

He remembered when Hoseok started dating in high school. The first one completely broke his hyung's heart. He thought back to the nights where he'd wake up in the middle of the night for water, and would accidentally hear sniffling noises from Hoseok's bedroom. Some nights he'd sneak in and cuddle him, allowing his hyung to be the little spoon. The second one came a year later when Hoseok thought he was ready but wasn't. It was Hoseok who ended up breaking the other person's heart. The third helped heal his hyung. And although they didn't last, Jimin was still grateful to that person who helped stitch his hyung back together. All of this made him reluctant to fall in love with anyone.

"I don't like anyone enough." Jimin answered truthfully. A movement from the corner of his eye caught his attention. He was momentarily afraid that it was security. But it was two students instead. Squinting a little, he noticed it was Kim Namjoon and a girl.

She was small with cat-like eyes and a permanent pout on her face. Jimin didn't recognize her from any of his classes. But he did remember that she sat two tables away from him at lunch.

"She's pretty." Taehyung mumbled, her face flushing a pretty pink color that complimented her caramel complexion.

"Hey." Jimin playfully snapped at her. "You have a boyfriend."

Namjoon noticed the two sitting and motioned for the girl to follow him. They sat one bleacher below the two juniors. And even then, Namjoon was the same height as Jimin. He mentally cursed his Daddy for passing on his short legs to him.

"Hey Jimin. Hey Taehyung. This is my best friend Yoonji." Namjoon introduced the girl who shyly waved. And Taehyung, although brave most times, mumbled a greeting while barely looking at the girl. Jimin wanted to laugh at her obvious crush. "You smoking my stuff?"

"Yeah. It's pretty good." Jimin nodded and took the pipe from Taehyung to get a few hits in.

Namjoon's curious eyes watched Jimin's lips wrap around the pipe. He wanted his customers to be satisfied. And it seemed like Jimin was very much so judging from how spaced out he looked after only two hits.

"You want to hit this?" Jimin offered the pipe to the dealer. But Namjoon shook his head and held up an already rolled blunt. It was fat and rolled perfectly.

"I guess we all had the same idea." Namjoon chuckled.

"I've never tried a pipe before." Yoonji commented, eyeing how Taehyung was hitting like an expert. Jimin fished out the rest of the weed from his pocket and passed it to Taehyung.

"Here. You and Yoonji sunbae can smoke the rest from your pipe." Jimin grinned. Truthfully, he was still stoned from this morning and he could go the rest of the school day without smoking anymore.

But he couldn't deny it when Kim Namjoon offered to share his blunt with him.

He allowed Jimin to light it up and hit it first. Which made the junior's heart do weird things in his chest. Namjoon was...nice. There was no way else to explain it. Hoseok had told him that drug dealers were often stingy and sometimes even cheated people out of the full amount they were paying for. But Namjoon was generous enough to share his blunt with Jimin and even allowed him to light it.

"I got more if you want to buy again." Namjoon offered and took the blunt back when Jimin passed it to him. He watched as Namjoon pushed the smoke back out of his mouth with his tongue only to inhale it with his nose. Jimin didn't know any smoking tricks but it was attractive when Namjoon did it. "Not on me right now but you could pick up after school."

"I won't have my car until Sunday." Jimin frowned.

"No worries." Namjoon grinned, showing a row of perfectly white teeth. "I could come by if you want."

And Jimin would have answered yes. That he wanted Namjoon to come by and to talk to him more. But Hoseok would be home and Jimin had already broken all three of his rules.

"My hyung will be home so I can't." Jimin felt like he was missing an opportunity which made him blurt out, "But we don't have to meet at my house. I could meet you at the park or something."

"Sure." Namjoon agreed, flashing another smile that made Jimin feel like he was sweating. As he passed the blunt back, he smacked lips together. Namjoon ran his pink tongue along those plump lips of his making Jimin feel like he was about to faint just from the sight. "Are you wearing chapstick by any chance?"

Jimin furrowed his eyebrows. He didn't usually wear chapstick because they usually made his lips drier. He slightly panicked, wondering if he left a bad taste on the blunt that Namjoon picked up. He shook his head before taking another hit and making sure his lips barely touched the blunt.

"I guess your lips must taste naturally like cherries then." Namjoon commented which caused Taehyung to choke on the hit she was taking. Even Yoonji's eyes widened at Namjoon's revelation.

Is this flirting, Jimin thought to himself, is this what flirtation looks like? For some miraculous reason, Jimin didn't feel embarrassed or shy. It was as if a spark of confidence lighted with within him.

"I guess they do." Jimin replied.

Chapter Text

Jimin's weekends were usually spent with Hoseok. They'd eat as much fast food as they could digest, watch movies until the early hours of the morning, and then end up cuddling. It was often that their parents found their two children curled up the the main living room, snoring softly and clutching on to each other as if their lives depended on it. On weekends that Hoseok had to work or was out of the country, Jimin felt lost. He still hung out with his parents. But there was nothing like falling asleep on his hyung's warm chest. Weekends were sacred to Jimin.

When Jimin headed home, still high, he avoided Hoseok as much as possible. Hoseok could always tell when he was under the influence even before Jimin realized it himself. If his hyung found out he's been smoking behind his back it would mean big trouble.

Jimin quickly finished his homework and thought back to the baseball field. After smoking, Namjoon headed back to the main campus first to be on lookout for security. When the coast was clear the three girls hurriedly ran back to campus as well. Although his heart was beating from running a quarter of a mile, Jimin could also tell that it was because of Namjoon. He had risked himself getting into trouble just so the girls wouldn't have to.

TaeTae: Is this cute? [Photo Attachment]

Jimin: Did you just send me a nude?

TaeTae: Yeah I wanna know if it's cute enough to send to my boyfriend

Jimin: Yeah but give a guy a warning first okay? I could have been with my parents. Your nudes are very nice and if he doesn't pop a hard one I'm gonna fight him

TaeTae: You're the best Jimin. It makes me insecure sometimes. Makes me feel unwanted.

Jimin: He probably feels insecure too

TaeTae: Probably. It's hard being long distance.

Jimin: Well he's lucky he has a super hot girlfriend to send him nudes to cope with the distance

TaeTae: :( You're the greatest friend

TaeTae: By the way...Namjoon couldn't keep his eyes off you the entire time we smoked

Jimin felt warmth flood his body after reading that last text. He wasn't naive. He knew that while Taehyung and Yoonji talked about their favorite hair dyeing methods, him and Namjoon hadn't talked but merely passed the blunt back and forth. As much as Namjoon made Jimin feel nervous there was still an air of comfort that he felt around the older boy.

A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts.

Hoseok barged in with a bright smile on his face which wasn't abnormal. He wrapped his arms around Jimin from behind and pressed an upside down kiss to his little brother's forehead. One of his favorite things about his hyung was his scent. He always smelled of fresh lavender flowers. The scent was so comforting that Jimin automatically felt the need to yawn whenever he smelled anything with lavender engraved into it.

"How was school darling?" Hoseok questioned, peering at the completed homework on Jimin's desk. He made a hum of approval when he noted that the work was finished.

"Good." Jimin replied, trying not to sound like he was on drugs. "I'm hungry though."

Hoseok swiveled his chair around to frown at his brother. His dark brown eyes scanned him over, making sure nothing was out of place. Thankfully he didn't seem to suspect that Jimin was high. He sighed after examining his baby brother. Hoseok's face scrunched up in worry.

"You look pale and tired." His hand came up to press against Jimin's forehead. "You're not warm."

"I didn't sleep well last night." Jimin lied. He didn't know if it was the high causing him to not feel the guilt he would have felt if he was sober.

"We can skip movie night if you need to catch up on sleep." Hoseok suggested, as his fingers ran through Jimin's hair. The younger felt himself leaning into the touch.

"I'll just take a nap." Jimin suggested with a lazy smile. The lavender scent was already pulling him to sleep.

"Okay baby. I have some errands to run, then I'll pick up some takeout and come back later tonight." Hoseok informed him. He pulled Jimin out of his chair and practically pushed him onto the bed. After making sure his baby brother was neatly tucked in, he pressed another kiss to his forehead. "Love you."

Jimin could have sworn that he only meant to close his eyes for five minutes. But when he opened them again, the sunlight that once poured into his room was replaced with moonlight. Groaning, he checked his phone. The brightness of the screen burned his eyes, indicating that he had been asleep for a while. His eyes widened as he noticed three missed calls from Namjoon. The older boy had saved his constant name as "Joonie" which made Jimin smile.

With his heart pounding in his chest, he redialed. The ringing seemed to prolong forever when in reality it took about ten seconds for Namjoon to pick up. Jimin bit his lip nervously as he waited for the call to connect.

"Hey Jimin." Namjoon picked up. From the background it sounded like he was driving.

"Hey hyung. You called?" Jimin's voice was deep with sleep and he was still a little bit out of it. His voice was breathy through the phone.

"Yeah. Why didn't you pick up?" Namjoon suddenly asked and Jimin felt his heart pound faster. Was Namjoon looking forward to talking to him that much? He grinned. No one had ever wanted to communicate with him that desperately before.

"I was sleeping. What's up?"

"I was doing some deliveries and wondered when you wanted to pick up."

"Oh. I can meet you now if that's okay." Jimin suggested and gave Namjoon the directions to the closest park in his neighborhood.

He hurriedly changed out of his school clothes and put something on that would look cuter for Namjoon. After five minutes of searching he decided on tight black leggings and white cotton sweater. With a dab of lipgloss, he was ready to face his dealer. It wasn't until Jimin reached the front door that he was stopped by one of the maids.

"Mr. Park it's quite late." She commented, eyeing the way Jimin was dressed. He looked like he was going to a date. But the old maid had gone through Hoseok's brief rebellious phase and was prepared for Jimin's any day now.  "What should I tell your parents?"

"Tell them I went to go buy ice cream for mine and hyung's movie night."

His family owned a total of six cars. Both of his dad's wanted a practical car and a luxury car. Hoseok owned a luxury one that was sleek and black and resembled a viper. And Jimin owned a cute smart car. "A tiny car for a tiny boy." His dad told him on his birthday.

He thanked his lucky stars that his daddy had taken the luxury car so he'd be able to drive the regular one. While his Papa didn't care much for luxury, his Daddy did. Seokjin loved to wear designer head to toe, dripped in jewelry everyday, and drove a car that only had two others like it in the whole world. Although Jimin could afford the replacement if anything went wrong, it was a bit embarrassing to drive a super car to a park. So he settled on the Tesla.

The drive was short but Jimin felt as if it lasted forever. In the dimly lit parking lot, he could see Namjoon listening to music in his own car. Pulling up next to him, he waved to get the other's attention. He gestured for Namjoon to enter his own car and unlocked the passenger side door.

"Nice car." Namjoon's eyes widened as he entered. It was a nice car. But cars didn't matter to Jimin. Getting to the point was what's important.

"I guess." Jimin blushed, immediately wishing he was in his smart car. The last thing he wanted to do was make it seem like he was flaunting his wealth in front of Namjoon. Which was why he only bought, at the most, ten thousand won of weed at a time. "You smell really good."

He hadn't meant to say that. But the scent of cologne hit his nose almost instantly.

"Yeah I went somewhere earlier." Namjoon grinned and changed the subject all too quickly. "How much did you want?"

Jimin had thought about this on the drive. He had brought fifty thousand won with him. If Jimin bought five grams, he knew that would make him Namjoon's number one customer. That would put him on a pedestal. But five grams of weed would take forever to smoke and he wasn't sure he could wait that long for Namjoon to talk to him again. In the end he settled for two and a half grams. That way he could smoke it all within four days and buy again from Namjoon soon. After Namjoon finished weighing the weed, he refused the twenty five from Jimin and settled for twenty.

"Why do you never let me pay full price?" Jimin pouted, trying to think of some way to sneak the extra five into Namjoon's pocket.

"Cause you're Jimin." Namjoon answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. And Jimin tried so hard to not smile. He really did. "I have a blunt in my car. Do you want to smoke with me again?"

"I've already smoked twice today. And I don't think I could drive back." Jimin answered truthfully. He thought of his hyung and how Hoseok didn't want him to become dependent on weed. "Oh. I didn't realize there was a full moon tonight."

The statement made Namjoon look up. Jimin did a little victory dance in his head for making the older boy smile.

"She's beautiful." Namjoon whispered so softly that Jimin had to turn the radio down to hear him. "I've always felt a connection to the moon."

"Me too." Jimin nodded in agreement. "I used to watch Sailor Moon everyday and would imagine myself as the moon prince. and I are her children."

"Moonchild." Namjoon replied. "Can I call you that?"


It didn't take long for them to delve into deeper topics. Such as the stars, space, and scientific theories. Jimin found himself more engaged in the conversation. No one knew of his love for space. No one knew that he spent his free time watching Into The Cosmos (the original version of course). No one knew that he thought earth was boring spent most of his days with his head above the atmosphere. Until Namjoon said he did the same things. There were people who claimed to be into space and aliens just for aesthetics. Jimin could usually tell who they were and lost interest. But not only did Namjoon keep up with Jimin's space talks, he also provided his own theories and insight on the world above the clouds.

"I heard it costs over a trillion to recreate a gram of antimatter." Namjoon told him as they laid in the car, seats drawn back so they had a view of the night sky. Due to pollution, they couldn't see the stars. But that didn't mean they weren't still there.

"That sucks. I've read about anti matter but I feel like the only way to study it is to be in contact with it." Jimin commented, his eyes becoming droopy again. Maybe it was the weed from earlier but he felt as if he could catch a few more hours of sleep. He stifled a yawn down but closed his eyes. He'd rest for five minutes before heading home.

"I agree." Namjoon responded sounding equally tired. They'd already spent an hour talking about space. And although Jimin wasn't tired of the conversation, he felt the same way around Namjoon as he did with Hoseok's lavender scent. It was comforting to him. Like the scent of the Busan sea. Like home.

It wasn't until Jimin was hanging on the cliff between consciousness and unconsciousness that he hard Namjoon speak again.

"I promise one day, you and I, we'll make mass amounts of antimatter."

Jimin woke up when a park ranger tapped on his driver's side window. A groan next to him alerted him that Namjoon was still in his presence. The ranger told them they had ten minutes to wake up and leave the park.

"How long did we nap?" Jimin rubbed his eyes before looking at his phone screen. A jolt of panic ran through his body as he noticed about ten missed calls from his dads and hyungs. And on top of that it was also eleven at night. "Fuck I'm gonna be in trouble."

"We slept for three hours. Fuck I'm late." Namjoon said as he stretched his body as much as he could.

"Late for what? Bedtime?" Jimin asked wondering what the hell Namjoon was late for at this hour.

"Sure." The dealer smirked. "I have something for you by the way."

He reached in his pocket to pull out a tin can about the size of a plum and handed it to Jimin. He took the can and examined it closely. It was white with brown teddy bears and red hearts on it. Jimin guessed that it was from the Valentine's Day sale at the store. Inside was a package of little chocolate hearts. It was the cutest present Jimin had ever received before.

"I noticed you didn't put your weed in anything and I didn't want it to smell every time you opened up your school bag." Namjoon watched carefully as Jimin twirled the cylindrical tin can in his fingers.

"Thank you Namjoon. That's so thoughtful." Jimin wasn't sure how to feel. He was thankful of course but he felt bad that he had nothing to give back to Namjoon. "I really love it."

"It's nothing." Namjoon brushed off and opened the Tesla's door. "I'll get going now. Drive safe okay? Text me when you've reached home."

If Jimin's heart was pounding at the gift then it was absolutely crashing against his ribs at Namjoon's words. No one ever told him to drive safe before other than his family. No one cared enough that he reached home okay. The dealer made him nervous but at the same time he gave him a warm feeling throughout his body.

"I will. Thank you Namjoon." Jimin replied once again. And if the words before melted Jimin into a puddle of mush then the fact that Namjoon waited for him to safely leave the park first made Jimin disintegrate into a pile of mush.

Now he had to deal with the possibility of getting grounded.

Chapter Text

Jimin: Just got home. About to walk in and get yelled at lol

Joonie: Don't lie. Just say that you went to the park and accidentally fell asleep.

Jimin: Will do! Thanks again!

Joonie: You're welcome :)

Jimin sighed and opened the door to be met with the face of his Daddy and Papa. Seokjin pulled him into his arms and squeezed him as tightly as he could.

"Where have you been Jimin?" Jungkook asked, looking over his son for any injuries.

"I went to go get ice cream and accidentally fell asleep in the park while I was eating some." Jimin answered half truthfully. He even raised up a plastic bag to show a tub of vanilla ice cream that he had hurriedly bought in the rush to arrive home.

Hoseok eyed him just like Jungkook was, making sure that nothing had harmed the youngest member of the family. Jimin had always been a good son and rarely got in trouble which was why his parents so easily believed him.

"Baby you shouldn't be out this late. Don't do it again okay?" Seokjin muttered as he kissed every possible inch of Jimin's face. "We were so worried."

"Jiminie was feeling really sleepy after school." Hoseok added and Jimin could feel a surge of love for his brother in his heart. "He was pale and fell asleep almost immediately."

"Are you feeling sick?" Jungkook questioned, placing his hand to Jimin's forehead.

"No just exhausted." And it technically wasn't a lie. Jimin had been tired but that was from the weed. "But I'm still up for movie night."

Hoseok grinned and pressed a kiss to Jimin's chubby cheek. He took the bag of ice cream and went to the kitchen to put it away as their parents fussed over Jimin. But one thing he loved about his parents was that they weren't overbearing. They knew when to push and when to pull back. Which is why after ten minutes of kissing and cuddling, they deemed Jimin was loved up enough and headed to bed.

The movie of the night was Mean Girls and Jimin found himself completely immersed into the movie as if he was Cady herself. It must have been the weed from earlier. Halfway through the film when Cady's arrogance ruined her friendships, Hoseok paused it.

"So who's the boy?" The question was so sudden that Jimin choked on the mouthful of popcorn he was chewing. His face turned red and he coughed loudly, bits of popcorn flying everywhere. Hoseok slapped his back and offered him a glass of juice while chuckling.

"What boy?" Jimin croaked out from his sore throat.

"The boy you went to go meet." And Jimin could never lie to his hyung. So he knew that he might as well be honest.

"How did you know?"

"You said you ate ice cream and then fell asleep but the tub of ice cream was sealed still." Hoseok smirked, knowing there was no escape and no excuses Jimin could make. He had his little brother trapped with no way of breaking out. He reached in his pocket and produced Namjoon's gift. "And this little teddy bear tin can of chocolate hearts you left in the bag?"

Jimin sighed. There was no lie he could make in front of Hoseok. And he didn't even want to lie to his hyung. Hoseok had done so much for him. He couldn't take his hyung for granted.

"I'm interested in someone." He revealed. Hoseok grinned triumphantly as if he just won a medal. To make things less serious he added, "It's not a crush yet but they have my attention."

Hoseok's grin faded to a pout. And his mouth did the ㅅ thing that Jimin found absolutely adorable. It was the truth as well. Jimin knew what a crush felt like and he didn't have one on Namjoon. It was too soon. But Namjoon did have his attention. The dealer made Jimin excited to go to school and a little disappointed to come home where he couldn't see him. He wanted to more. He wanted to know what was going through that beautiful mind of Namjoon's. What his thoughts were on pulsars and Oort clouds. What his secrets and ambitions are. What made him who he is. Jimin just wanted to know.

"Just be safe okay? And I don't mean that in a sexual way. Seoul isn’t Busan. There's lots of people here who would date you just to exploit you." Hoseok frowned and wrapped his arm around Jimin's delicate shoulders. He rested his head on his big brother's chest.

"If they do that then good luck to them." Jimin chuckled, cuddling up to Hoseok's warm body. "Because I have a big brother who will beat them up."

"Damn right you do baby."

Joonie: I just got some shrooms if you're interested

Jimin: Hm I'm not sure. What are the effects?

Joonie: It makes you trip. Sometimes trips are good or bad. Depends on your mindset when you do it. So don't do it on a day that you're really sad.

Jimin: How intense is it?

Joonie: I had an out of body experience

Jimin: I think I'll pass. I'm too scared lol

Joonie: Well the offer is still there if you change your mind :)

Winter stepped out and in came the spring. Windy days replaced freezing ones. And on the last few weeks of spring, a sudden heat filled the country as it prepared for summer. Jimin was happy to be leaving school for a while. To leave the stares and pictures that students would take of him when they thought he wasn't looking. Finals were coming up and he forced himself into a studying frenzy that began early in the morning and ended late at night. Jimin smoked in the nighttime hours after studying. He didn't even rely on Hoseok anymore.

His friendship with Taehyung blossomed. She began to sit with him at lunch and they'd often go to the baseball field to smoke. They hung out after school and his family adored her to the point where she even exchanged phone numbers with them. She won their hearts by doing a play by play reenactment of Seokjin's first drama and a cover of Jungkook's debut song. She also knew all the words to Hoseok's music. Even the SoundCloud stuff. They spent most of their free time together before finals came in. It was safe to say Taehyung was the closest friend he'd ever had. She didn't care about his wealth or fame. She only cared about who he was as a person. Jimin had gotten sick one day when the pollen was at its worst and couldn't go to school. He was awoken by Taehyung cuddling up to him in bed and medicine on his bedside table. It warmed his heart immensely. And when Taehyung held a tissue to his snotty nose and told him to blow into it, that only strengthened their bond.

The only thing Jimin wasn't looking forward to was the senior’s last day of school. The seniors were allowed to leave school earlier than the rest of the students and after that they were not permitted on campus anymore. It was a privilege that his school gave as a gift for working so hard for four years. Which meant that he'd never see Kim Namjoon again. Throughout the few months Jimin and Namjoon hadn't fully become friends. But instead Namjoon became a presence in his life that was always there. They worked together along with Taehyung in English class. They sat within a ten feet distance of each other at lunch. And would always exchange friendly smiles in the hallways. Jimin still wasn't sure of the feelings he had for the dealer. In reality he hadn't even had time to think about his feelings. His weekdays were spent going to school, studying, smoking, and hanging out with Taehyung. His weekends were spent with Hoseok either at home or exploring Seoul. With finals around the corner Jimin found himself talking to Namjoon less and less and not even buying weed from him that often. Taehyung had found another dealer and shared his weed with Jimin. So there was no need to go to Namjoon anymore.

Until his last day of school.

Namjoon had texted him the night before that he had wanted to talk to him. And Jimin told him to meet him at the baseball field. It was early in the morning that day but Jimin was already feeling hot and sweaty. He hated the summer weather. It was unnecessarily humid and sticky. Times like this made Jimin feel sorry for taking the coldness of the winter for granted.

Jimin heard giggling as he rounded the corner to the bleachers and paused. He was cautious of smoking around anyone else. If his secret spot had been compromised Namjoon couldn't meet him there. But a familiar head of aqua blue hair caught his attention and Jimin felt like screaming at the scene in front of him.

Taehyung was sat on the bleachers with her tongue in Yoonji's mouth and her hand up her skirt. The sight made him want to rip the two of them apart and give Taehyung a lecture. After all, Taehyung still had a boyfriend in Daegu and that wasn't fair. Jimin wasn't a snitch at all. But even he knew that cheating was wrong. Even if his best friend was doing it. He felt sick to his stomach and fought back the urge to cry. From what Taehyung had told him, her boyfriend had been head over heels in love with her. And now she was ruining his trust. Jimin didn't know what to do with this revelation. He loved Taehyung dearly. But this was wrong.

Jimin: Meet me at the football field instead

Even as he waited for Namjoon, he couldn't get the sight out of his head. Taehyung was a good person and he still thought of her that way. She cared about him, listened to him, and supported him through anything. She provided him with warm hugs when he was down and bright rectangular smiles when he was happy. Taehyung was the best person he'd ever met. And nothing had changed. Except for the fact that she was breaking someone's heart. But Jimin couldn't stop her from doing what she wanted. He could complain and rant. But Taehyung's choices were her own and Jimin would continue to be her best friend no matter what.

"Hey." Namjoon's voice suddenly startled Jimin. His heart felt like it was bursting out of his chest. "What's wrong? You look sad."

"I'll be okay." Jimin replied with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "You wanted to talk?"

"Okay two things." Namjoon grinned at Jimin showing those deep dimples that he loved. "First I want to ask you some advice."

Jimin perked up a bit. He wondered what he could help Namjoon with since the boy seemed to know more about life than anyone else. Namjoon was so mature and older that he didn't think he'd be of much assistance to him

"I want to ask Taehyung out."


Suddenly Jimin's stomach was void of any fluttering butterflies from a minute before. He swallowed harshly, trying to prevent himself from screaming his frustrations about Taehyung. But he was also envious. He didn't realize that Namjoon harbored feelings for Taehyung all along. Maybe it was because Taehyung was so pretty and funny and interesting that she's caught his attention. Jimin tended to be much shyer and laid back. He felt like a wallflower. Invisible but still very much there. At that moment Jimin decided that any interest in Kim Namjoon would stop right there.

"She has a boyfriend." Jimin admitted and hated the way that Namjoon didn't seem to be affected. He just nodded in understanding. "He lives in Daegu so they're long distance."

"So I shouldn't try?" Namjoon questioned with his smile faltering a bit.


He felt bad for everyone. Yoonji. Taehyung. Namjoon. Mostly for Yoonji and Taehyung's boyfriend. They didn't ask to be dragged into this mess. After a few moments of silence Namjoon continued on.

"The second thing is that I have Xanax and I wanted you to try it." Namjoon offered and pulled out a clear plastic baggy of small blue pills.

And Jimin should have said no. He really should have declined. Drugs ruined people's lives and he had a bright future ahead of him.

But all he could see was the vision of Taehyung being unfaithful and accepted the drugs.

His skin was even hotter than it was before and he found himself in a focused and angry state. He avoided Taehyung all day. He didn't speak to her in class and avoided the routes Taehyung usually walked. Jimin knew that if he saw her, he'd probably explode at her. And he couldn't ruin the one amazing friendship he had. So he ignored her that day.

Maybe it was a bad thing to do. But what Taehyung did was so much worse. The guilt of knowing what happened followed him around like a dark shadow that day. He hadn't even said goodbye to Namjoon. The dealer didn't do anything wrong but Jimin felt anger towards him as well. He thought Namjoon used his friendship to get closer to Taehyung. But maybe that was the Xanax speaking.

"You okay honey? Your face is a bit red." Jungkook asked his son as he entered the mansion. Jimin shook his head and proceeded upstairs to take a nap. Everyone was annoying him and he felt like screaming at his Papa for even asking that question.

Everything and everyone sucked.

Jimin: How much do shrooms cost?

Namjoon: For a single use it's ten

Jimin: Can I pick up?

Namjoon: Sure but I thought you didn't want to do other drugs

Jimin: Shit happened

Namjoon: Wanna talk about it?

Jimin: No

It was late at night when Jimin left his house to pick up some the shrooms. This was his first time sneaking out and he couldn't find it in himself to forget the consequences of if he was caught. Jimin just wanted to forget. And weed couldn't help him forget something like this. He was lost in thought the entire time. Namjoon, Yoonji, and Taehyung's boyfriend were captivated by Taehyung so easily. Tears welled up in Jimin's eyes as he realized he would never be pretty like Taehyung. Never funny like Taehyung. He was the best friend of the pretty girl whom no one looked at. But he was still a person. And being overlooked fucking hurt. Jimin wanted to hate Taehyung. He wanted to hate her for being so beautiful and captivating. But he couldn't. Because despite her actions, Taehyung was such a good person and Jimin was only a second lead.

"Are you okay Jimin?" Namjoon asked once he was seated in Jimin's car. His long legs didn't fully stretch all the way out so he looked a bit funny as his knees almost came to his chest. "You seriously look like you're about to cry."

"I'm fine." He gritted out between clenched teeth and handed Namjoon the ten thousand won. The boy accepted it and in turn, gave Jimin the blunt he had been smoking.

"Here. You look like you need this." Namjoon offered him. Any rules about smoking and driving had been thrown out the window by then and Jimin accepted the blunt. It had been a few days since he last smoked so Jimin got stoned relatively quickly.

After a few moments, Jimin finally opened up.

"If you cared about someone deeply but know they're hurting someone else. What would you do?" He questioned, staring out the window at his favorite person. The moon.

"I'd tell them straight up that they're being a dick." Namjoon shrugged easily as if that was the most obvious answer. "Friendships are tested by the truth. And if you can't tell them the truth, are you even a true friend to them?"

Namjoon was right. He was being stupid by avoiding Taehyung. When he woke up from his nap yesterday, he had ignored her messages. If telling the truth made him lose Taehyung then at least he was honest.

"Why didn't you say goodbye to me today?" Namjoon asked with a hint of desperation in his voice.

"Because I didn't want to." Jimin answered the dealer truthfully. And he decided if he was going to be honest then he'd go all out. "Maybe I'm not ready to say goodbye."

"I'll still be around. Anytime you want to see me, I'll come to you." The promise made Jimin smile. But he knew that friendships didn't last after high school. He had watched his hyung go from being the most popular boy at school to only keeping in contact with three people. "By the way, why did you stop buying weed from me?"

"Taehyung and I usually smoke together so she started buying and sharing with me." Jimin frowned as he thought about his best friend again. Quickly changing the topic of conversation, he turned to Namjoon with a teasing smile. "Why? Are you jealous?"

"Very." Namjoon chuckled and took a few puffs of his blunt before continuing on. "You're only allowed to come to me. Got it?"

"Got it."

Namjoon didn't seem to be in a rush this time so Jimin thoroughly enjoyed his company. They talked all night about aliens and multiverses. Jimin found those feelings for Namjoon that had been muted for a few months, building up again. He didn't know how to act on these feelings. Could he like a boy who was interested in his best friend at some point?

"I just think it's ridiculous how people are so quick to dismiss the multiverse. There was a time where we once thought the earth was the center of the universe and didn't know better until we developed our technology. The multiverse could be out there but we'd never know because the technology isn't there yet." Jimin passionately told Namjoon.

The dealer watched him closely. How his lips seemed to pout, blaming humans for not being more competent. How Jimin's eyes widened when he argued about how we were just one tiny drop of water in a whole ocean of universes. And Namjoon found himself realizing that he had never met anyone who loved the unknown as much as Jimin.

"We'll probably never live to see the day that the theory is confirmed." Namjoon answered, taking his eyes off Jimin to focus on the moon. He too felt a connection to the huge satellite.

"I know and that upsets me so much hyung. I'll die before the earth gets pulled into the sun, the Milky Way and Andromeda collide, the solar system gets eaten up by the supermassive black hole in the center." And Jimin was genuinely upset he'd miss those great events. It was something he thought about late at night. How his brain couldn't handle the tons of information that the future generation will.

"You can't dismiss how far we've come though. Humans invented the internet which is like a whole brain connected to other brains. We recreated the most important and complex organ." Namjoon grinned. And Jimin supposed he was right. His mind was stuck in the future so often that he forgot to look back. He was thankful for Namjoon's intellectual insight.

Jimin returned him with shrooms in one hand and his phone in the other, constantly texting Namjoon. And it made him forget about his day. As he laid in bed after a shower, Jimin had a sudden epiphany.

The feelings that drugs gave him and the feelings that Namjoon gave him were exactly the same.

Chapter Text

Finals came along and the entire school was rushing to turn in last minute assignments and projects. Jimin considered himself lucky since he only needed to submit two projects. After that he could slack off as much as he wanted and smoke an entire marijuana farm as he pleased.

After a few days of avoiding the inevitable he texted Taehyung to meet him in the school bathroom. The two talked through their feelings like mature young adults which was surprising to Jimin. He had been so afraid that he'd lose his friend by speaking the truth. The two best friends locked themselves into a stall and solved their issues.

"I know about you and Yoonji." Jimin revealed as he absentmindedly played a lose white thread on his sweater. "That's why I've been avoiding you."

"When did you find out?" Taehyung questioned with wide eyes. "I was gonna tell you but you just suddenly stopped talking to me."

"Last week." He frowned. "I'm not going to lie Taehyung. I'm disappointed in you. And I'm terrified that I'm going to lose the greatest friend I've ever had if I speak my mind. But I have to do what's right."

Taehyung took in the information calmly. Her thick eyebrows furrowed together as she tried to come up with something to say.

"I'm disappointed with myself." She responded with a whisper. "My feelings overcame me and I wasn't thinking. Especially not about him. When I'm with her all I can focus on is Yoonji."

"Then be fair to both of them Taehyung." Jimin interjected, his voice rising a bit in volume but not to the point where he was shouting. "You're hurting both of them. Take care of it now before it gets ugly."

"...will you tell her?"

Jimin sighed. As much as it was unfair to Taehyung's boyfriend and Yoonji, it wasn't his place. The only thing he could do was encourage his friend to do what was right.

"No." He replied firmly. "But I hope you do the right thing."

Taehyung came forward to place her hands on Jimin's shoulders. Her deep brown eyes came in contact with Jimin's own ones. The look she had was firm and promising.

"I will." She promised him. "I'm going to leave my boyfriend."

Jimin pulled her into a tight hug and inhaled her flowery scent that he had missed so much. He had suspected that Taehyung felt more for Yoonji than her boyfriend. But now it was confirmed. He felt giddy for his best friend's love life. If he didn't have one then he'd live through Taehyung's. Sharp light brown eyes flashed in his mind.

It was later in the day that Jimin heard from Namjoon. He was resting in his bed after a half day of school. Music blared trough his headphones as he scrolled through Instagram.

Joonie: I miss seeing you every day

A face splitting grin formed on Jimin's face as his heart did backflips. What in the world was Kim Namjoon doing to him?

Jimin: I'm always a phone call away

Joonie: It's not the same. Wanna meet up tonight? I have something for you.

Jimin: More gifts? You don't have to

Joonie: I would give you the world Kim Jimin

It was easy to fake a stomach ache which excused him from family dinner. Behind his parents' worried frowns was Hoseok's pouting. The Jeon-Kim family didn't have dinners together often. But it was precious event when they did. A twinge of guilt settled in his stomach as he snuck out while his family enjoyed dinner without him.

Namjoon's car was already there when he parked beside it. This time, Jimin entered Namjoon's. It was quite clean and smelled faintly of weed and cologne. The dealer looked fancy that night. He wore a black button down shirt and black jeans. His long dark hair was slicked back and curled into his neck. The light brown eyes that Jimin had never seen in a Korean before shined almost as bright as the moon.

"You look beautiful." Namjoon eyed the way Jimin's silk shirt was a little too large and exposed his collarbones.

"Thank you." Jimin grinned, his eyes turning into little slits and cheeks turning pink.

Namjoon leaned over and for a moment Jimin thought he was going to do something that he wasn't ready for. But the older boy reached into his glove compartment, arms brushing against Jimin's thighs to retrieve a piece of paper. It was a thick paper that had been ripped out from a journal and folded into a neat square. Jimin's hands trembled as he took the paper from where Namjoon was offering it to him.

"Jimin" it read on one of the folds. From out of the corner of his eye, Jimin could see the dealer beginning to roll a blunt. He focused his attention back to opening up the piece of paper.

"when the moon illuminates upon this world
when this city rests her eyes
when the ordinaries fall deep into slumber
that's when i'll meet you
beneath our oak tree that listens in on our talks
she soaks up all of our stories and memories
this special place is where i'll meet you
you who speaks of foreign galaxies and worlds unknown
you who holds the stars in his eyes
you with an angelic voice that follows me home
i miss you even when you're here beside me
please stay a little longer
please stay with me"

"Namjoon..." Jimin's eyes widened as he reread the poem once, twice, three times more. His voice cracked. He didn't cry. The shock after reading the poem caused his throat to close up.

"I wrote it while thinking of you this weekend. Like I said, I miss seeing you everyday." Namjoon smiled and glanced at the paper in Jimin's delicate hand.

"Do you often write poems to your friends?" Jimin wondered out loud, not meaning to. The smell of weed filled the car when Namjoon lit up the blunt.

"Only you." The dealer winked after taking a hit and passing it to Jimin.

The two talked more that night but somehow it felt more different. If Jimin was engaged into conversations with Namjoon before, now he was completely obsessed. He hung on to every word that the older boy spoke. Even if he was high, he found himself more focused than ever. Namjoon spoke with such intelligence and intellect that Jimin found himself staring at those plump lips, waiting for the next sentence to come. For the first time in his life, he thanked whatever deity was up there for bringing someone like Namjoon into his life. He truly felt as if there was an unknown force that intertwined the roads of their lives to collide eventually.

It felt as if the world had shifted and made a special place beneath the large oak tree. An alternate dimension where only the two of them could slip into during these moments. The universe, with all her power, changed destiny and allowed the two of them to meet. The two twin souls that seemed older than creation and fit together without any missing spots.

Jimin was scared.

This feeling arrived so naturally and settled deep into his bones and he hadn't even realized. Behind dimples and sharp brown eyes came a sudden feeling that nothing else mattered in this moment. Just him and his soulmate, Kim Namjoon. Life would never be the same again.

But as much as it was terrifying, it was addictive. It was a rush that tainted his veins like a drug. A burst of energy that made him felt as if he was going a hundred miles per hour while blindfolded. A feeling of standing at the edge of a cliff with one foot raised to take the next step.

When the dawn arrived the two boys bid each other farewell. This was the latest Jimin had ever stayed out and the buzzing feeling beneath his veins was so intense that he didn't care about the consequences. Not even when he arrived home to his worried family.

"Jimin where have you been?" Seokjin almost shouted as soon as he walked through the door. "I went into your room to wake you up and couldn't find you! Have you been out all night?"

Jimin's eyes felt heavy and he just wanted to shower and get to school before his exam started. He couldn't find the energy to lie to his Daddy as he had done before. With a nod, he made his way upstairs and into his room. Seokjin's yelling was drowned out by his drowsiness.

After a shower, he felt as if he could make it through the day. He remembered to slip the poem into his pocket, eager to finally tell Taehyung about his growing crush on Kim Namjoon. He hadn't meant to hide his feelings. But maybe he wanted to keep the secrecy of finding a beautiful soul like Namjoon to himself for a while.

"...has never done something like this before. What's gotten into him?" His Daddy's voice filtered from the kitchen as he complained to his husband of Jimin's behavior. The junior rolled his eyes as he strode into the kitchen to grab an apple before school.

"Talking shit about me?" His voice interrupted his parents as he leaned back against the counter and munched on the apple.

"Language Kim Jimin!" Seokjin scolded with a face almost as red as the apple. He looked a bit silly and Jimin tried to hide his smile. But ultimately failed. "Does this look like a funny matter to you Jimin? Where were you all night?"

Jungkook decided to intervene at that moment. And Jimin was grateful. He didn't want to say something that would cause his Daddy to get even more angered. But at the same time, he didn't care what came out of his mouth.

"Seokjin, Jimin's going to be late to school. Let's talk about this when he comes home okay? Remember that you and I were teenagers at some point as well." Jungkook wrapped his arms around his husband and almost immediately Seokjin melted into his touch. Jimin found himself wondering if he'd react the same way if Namjoon touched him like that. "But Jimin I'm disappointed in you as well. I hope you know that."

"I know." And Jimin strolled out the kitchen without another word.

Throughout the exam, Jimin found it hard to focus. It was as if all the studying from before had evaporated from his brain. All he could think about was last night and what he would tell Taehyung at lunch. His mind came up with thousands of possibilities of Taehyung's reaction. Would she be happy for him? Would she be concerned? Would she support him?

The "what if's" floated through his mind for two hours until the exam finished. He decided that Taehyung would be excited for him. She would probably even suggest double dates with Yoonji. It was perfect. Two best friends dating another pair of best friends.

Dating. It seemed as if that was where he was heading with Kim Namjoon.

Jimin stripped off his jacket as he and Taehyung sat on the bleachers. The nervousness from before had disappeared when it was time to confess his crush on Namjoon to her.

"I have to tell you something Tae." He attracted her attention away from her phone where she was furiously typing. Most likely texting Yoonji. Her curious round eyes rested on his face and Jimin took a deep breath before spilling his secret. "I like Kim Namjoon."

Taehyung's eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. So Jimin continued on with his explanation.

"We've been talking and meeting up at night. He's so different Tae. He loves space and the moon. He's so smart. Like one of the smartest boys I've ever met. He's so different. I've never talked to anyone like him before. And-" Jimin fumbled around in his pocket to retrieve the poem and handed it to Taehyung. "He wrote me this poem."

Taehyung looked as if she wanted to say something but Jimin thrusted the poem into her hand before he got the chance. She raised an eyebrow at his name scribbled into the folding before opening up the paper fully to read it. Jimin averted his eyes, giving her privacy to react to the poem. It was a few moments before she said anything. And her tone was not happy.

"Jimin...I'm sorry to say this but..." Taehyung placed a finger underneath his chin, and turned Jimin to face her. Her eyes were filled with sorrow and regret. "Namjoon has been texting me all morning and he sent me this exact poem."

Taehyung fumbled for her phone and shoved the screen in Jimin's face.

Kim Namjoon: Hey Taehyung I wrote you a poem while thinking of you

Taehyung: Really?

Kim Namjoon: [Photo Attachment]

Taehyung: That's really sweet Namjoon but I'm not really into space and what oak tree are you talking about?

Kim Namjoon: Just a fantasy I have of us. I really like you Taehyung. And I miss seeing you every day.

Taehyung: You're a nice person Namjoon. But I have someone I like already.

It was Taehyung. Of course it was Taehyung. Perhaps Namjoon wrote that poem with Taehyung in mind, using his memories with Jimin to help.

It was Taehyung. Gorgeous, hilarious, and interesting Taehyung that Namjoon liked. How could Jimin be so stupid to think Namjoon could see him behind the beautiful Kim Taehyung?

It was Taehyung.

"I have to go." Jimin suddenly stood up and grabbed his bag from the bleacher below them. His heart was racing a mile a minute as he ran from the baseball field. Quickly shoving his bag into his car, he sped away from the school.

Jimin didn't cry. He didn't scream. He didn't hate Taehyung. Who could? Instead, he felt stupid. How foolish of him to think that a boy like Kim Namjoon would like him.

I don't care, Jimin told himself, it was just a brief crush.

He was sure he broke a few road laws when he arrived him within five minutes. But he couldn't find the energy to care. Seokjin and Jungkook were still home when Jimin arrived. The two looked ready to talk to him and possibly ground him. But one glance at his face, made his wonderful parents wrap their arms around him. How could he take his parents for granted over a boy that didn't even matter?

But he did matter.

Which was why Jimin finally broke down in his parents embrace. He could keep it together in front of Taehyung and in the car. But surrounded by the people he loved so passionately, his walls crumbled down like his heart. Non stop tears soaked into his parents' designer shirts as they held their baby boy. Jimin wasn't aware but Seokjin and Jungkook knew their son was having his first ever panic attack. The way he told them his chest was tightening and felt heavy, his sobbing that sounded like screams, the way he gasped for air as if he was being suffocated.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Jimin chanted as he inhaled and exhaled loudly. "I didn't mean it. I'm sorry Daddy, Papa. I'm so sorry."

Seokjin gave Jungkook a look before pulling Jimin out of his chest. His baby was gasping loudly with a red face of tears. Jungkook lifted up his shirt to wipe away the snot on Jimin's nose as if he was a child, disregarding the expensive material. Jimin was far more important.

"Breathe baby, breathe." Seokjin murmured, bringing Jimin into his arms like a baby. Jungkook pulled his son's thighs into his lap. "Shh...Daddy and Papa are here. We love you so much."

"Think about Busan." Jungkook whispered to the small boy as he rubbed up and down his calves. "Think about the ocean."

Jimin's breathing even out as he closed his eyes. He could picture himself by the ocean, warm sand between his toes and the salty taste of the air on his tongue. And slowly, he fell into a deep slumber in the arms of his parents.

Joonie: Hey :)

Joonie: I miss you

Joonie: I hope you didn't get in trouble this morning

Joonie: I really miss you

Joonie: I want to see you again tonight

Joonie: How about it?

Joonie: I read about a new theory that we can discuss

Joonie: Maybe we could write poems together tonight?

Joonie: Text me when you can

Joonie: I fucking miss you Kim Jimin

Joonie: You okay?

Joonie: I hope you're okay

Joonie: I want you to always smile

Joonie: Your smile is so beautiful

Joonie: What are you doing to me Jimin?

Joonie: I can't stop thinking about you

Joonie: Please text me as soon as possible

Joonie: I really want to hear your voice tonight

Jimin: I know what you did Kim Namjoon

Joonie: What...?

Jimin: I feel like a fucking idiot. I really thought you were different from all the boys in Seoul. If you liked Taehyung that much you should have told her as soon as possible. I can't even begin to think of a reason you would do that to me. Do you like seeing people get hurt Namjoon? Is that what excites you? You're heartless. But that's fine. You're just another lesson I learned. Next time I'll make sure never to open my heart to someone. Delete my number and don't ever talk to me again.

Namjoon: Oh Jimin. Even when you're mad you still entertain me. That's all you were. Entertainment. Just another little slut that I can use and throw away. Did you think you were the first? There was so many more before you. So innocent and naive. You were so ready to give everything to me. You would have given everything to me if I asked. It's too bad you figured exactly who I am so soon. I would have fucked you so good. I would have made you cry while begging for more. I hope I made you cry when you found out. I would have loved to see it. It would have made my dick hard. But you know what would arouse me even more? To see you hang yourself. Kill yourself for me baby.

Jimin: I will.

Chapter Text

Jimin didn't kill himself that night.

But he did take the shrooms.

His legs wobbled as he made his way to the bathroom and took a long hot shower. His head was still a little woozy and he felt as if he smoked ten pounds of pot the night before. Jimin didn't remember much. He had dipped the shrooms in hazelnut spread so they wouldn't taste like dirt. After ten minutes he felt mild disappointment thinking they weren't potent as he still felt sober. But within another ten minutes Jimin could feel his soul leaving his body. His mind flashed with random images of telling Hoseok he couldn't hang out last night, hearing voices in his head singing in sync, and thinking he could suddenly walk through walls. After what happened the day before, Jimin was lucky that he had a good trip.

After the crying session with his parents, he was forgiven for being rude. As he rounded the corner to the kitchen, the scent of breakfast wafted to his nose. There were stacks of pancakes, piles of bacon, and mugs of steaming coffee. Seokjin greeted him with kisses all over his face and Jungkook by lifting him up and spinning him. Hoseok must have been filled in on what happened so he suggested they go dancing like old times after school. As he enjoyed breakfast with his cheerful family, Jimin made a promise to never disrespect them again. Especially not over boys.

Jimin met Taehyung in the library as he needed to print out an assignment. As soon as he caught sight of his best friend he began to profusely apologize for running off yesterday. But Taehyung felt sympathetic towards him and admitted that she would have probably reacted the same way if she had been in his shoes. Taehyung was sat down on one of the library desks and next to her was the monitor on which Jimin was working on.

"So what happened yesterday?" Taehyung questioned, biting into a breakfast bar.

"I...cried." Jimin admitted as he pulled up the document. He quickly scanned through it, making sure his assignment was perfect.

"Oh baby." Taehyung frowned and placed her delicate and perfectly manicured hand on his shoulder. "I can't believe he did that."

Jimin sighed. He didn't want to think of Kim Namjoon. But he felt as if he owed Taehyung an explanation. Maybe it was because he never really had a good friend before. But Jimin still found it a bit difficult to open up.

"That's not even the worst of it all." He frowned and unlocked his phone, allowing Taehyung to read his messages from last night.

She gasped at the disgusting messages. He felt bad for making her lose her appetite. But her eyes teared up. Taehyung's face showed a monopoly of emotions ranging from anger to disgust to sadness.

"Jimin he's psychotic." Taehyung shook her head and pulled Jimin into her chest. She placed kisses to his forehead and Jimin found himself relaxing in her embrace. "It's good you found out so soon. You didn't try harm yourself last night because of what he said right?"

Jimin's eyes widened. He'd never consider self harm or suicide. And Kim Namjoon wasn't that important to him. He had too much to live for and no boy would take that away.

"Of course not. I'm fine. I swear." Jimin grinned. But he wasn't sure if he was lying.

He focused back on his document and clicked the print button. He hummed a catchy pop song he'd heard on the radio that morning as he waited for his assignment to print. Looking to his left, Jimin noticed Jaehyun and Yugyeom sitting in the comfy library couch and waved at them. They each gave him bright smiles before turning back to their textbooks.

"Jimin..." Taehyung whispered suddenly, taking his attention away from where he was watching his document being printed. "...Kim Namjoon is watching you."

Jimin felt his heart drop suddenly. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. But he kept his eyes focused on the computer in front of him.

"Fuck. I think he knows we're talking about him. He's smiling and just staring at you." Taehyung whispered and Jimin cursed at the printer for not going faster. He wanted to get out of there and as far away as he could from that man.

But a sudden realization made him panic.

"Taehyung he can't be here." Jimin's eyes widened. "He's not a student anymore. Taehyung he's going to get arrested if anyone recognizes him."

"So let him get arrested! It's what he deserves!" Taehyung fiercely told him. "I should report him."

Jimin snatched his assignment from the old printer and placed it neatly into his history folder. He packed up his bag and slung it onto his shoulder. Averting his eyes from the row of books where Namjoon stood watching him, he turned to Taehyung.

"Let's just go. I don't want to be here."

And even as he walked out of the library, he could feel those sharp eyes staring at his back.

It was in the middle of history class when he felt his phone buzz. The class was two hours longer due to exams and his teacher had no more lessons. Students excitedly spoke to each other about what they'd be doing over the summer. His teacher looked five minutes away from falling asleep. And soft piano music filled the room.

Kim Namjoon: Do you hate me?

Jimin: No.

Kim Namjoon: Do you still like me?

Jimin: No.

Kim Namjoon: I still like you

Jimin: I hate you

Kim Namjoon: I want to see you. I want to explain myself. Please. I'll be waiting behind the art building. If you decide not to come I'll understand and I'll leave you alone.

Jimin didn't go at first. When the bell rang, he headed to his next class. He was sure he had made up his mind. Kim Namjoon would just become a name that he'd forget eventually and Jimin would continue on with his life. He'd graduate, go back to Busan with his brother, spend the rest of his life with his best friend. Then eventually he'd find a man who cherished only him and was faithful to him.

When Jimin opened his backpack to write in his journal, an object caught his eye. It was the cute teddy bear tin can of chocolate hearts that Namjoon had given him to hide his weed. He had never used it for weed. He hadn't even eaten the chocolates. His fingers ghosted over the the cartoon bears printed on the design and felt his heart ache. One more chance, Jimin told himself after making a decision.

The teachers, slacking off because of exams, didn't even bat an eyelash when Jimin asked to go to the bathroom with his backpack. In fact, she even wrote him a hall pass and told him to come back eventually. His heart seemed to beat faster as he approached the art building. Namjoon gave him a smile as the younger boy approached him hesitantly. Jimin found it hard to believe that the boy with such a sweet smile said those horrible things to him last night. But people can be sly and Jimin had his guard up.

Namjoon was about to speak first but Jimin interrupted him.

"What are you doing here Namjoon?" He asked. "You could get arrested."

The older boy frowned and avoided his eyes. He focused on the top button of Jimin's shirt instead. Jimin could see his jaw tense and relax a few times.

"I was scared." Namjoon admitted with a low voice a few moments later. "Last night I tried calling you but only got your voicemail. I thought- Jimin I thought you-"

Jimin briefly remembered putting his phone on airplane mode as he played video games for a few hours while on the shrooms. He shouldn't have. His chest felt tight knowing that he made Namjoon distressed.

"You thought I killed myself." Jimin finished for him, saying what Namjoon was too scared to admit. The older boy nodded.

"I had to see you today." Namjoon took a step forward and rested his hands on Jimin's delicate shoulders. Almost as if he was making sure the junior was real and not just a figment of his imagination. "I had to see that you're okay. That you’re alive."

But Jimin took a step back, out of Namjoon's reach.

"Why did you play me Namjoon?" He pondered out loud.

The man dropped his hand to his sides. He looked defeated. As if all the hope had been sucked out of his body when Jimin moved away.

"I did play you. Only because that's what I'm used to. Using people and then moving on." Jimin should have felt disgusted at this confession. But the way Namjoon looked as if he was having internal conflict with himself made him feel bad for the dealer. "But Jimin, you're so different from anyone I've ever met and I got scared. But I know what I want now Jimin. I stayed up all night thinking about you and hoping you were okay. It's you. You're the one I want."

"There's lots of smart people out there." He argued. Maybe he was feeding into his own insecurities. But he needed to be reassured that Namjoon only wanted him.

"They're not you Kim Jimin." Namjoon whispered, taking another cautious step toward the younger. "They're not my Moonchild."

Jimin didn't move away this time. Instead he took one step forward and opened his arms. Namjoon smelled of cologne and cigarettes. And the way he held onto Jimin was as if he was made out of precious stones. As he rested his head on Namjoon's chest, he could hear the other boy's heartbeat and how it was thumping quickly. I did that, Jimin told himself, a smile forming on his plump pink lips.

"Kim Jimin you're changing me. So much. You make me want to be a better person. A better man for you." Namjoon's deep husky voice whispered into his hair. He held him a little too tight. But that was okay. Jimin didn't mind.

"I promise I'll never hurt you again."