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The Coochiebowl No. 4096: The Great Coochie Flood

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'Very Nice, Shiza-chan!" Joseph announced via loud-spatula as he ate a handful of [insert your worst fear here]. It was the 4096th Coochiebowl, the one that would decide it all. The fate of the universe lie in the six hands of Squidward J. Tentacles.

The Coochiebowl was a literal bowl. The Coochie Denizens watched the cephalopod strut into the center of the area. His time as Speedwagon's stand has made him very confident in his abilities.

"You know the rules folks!" Referee Ascension Okuyasu came into the area. His shirt had the face of his son, Josuke Metallica, adorned front and center. "First one to fill the bowl with soup wins!" The proud father announced, hamsters crawling out his pant leg.

"It pains me to fight you like this." Robert E.O. Speedwagon said as he descended from the heavens. "But if it's what you want, I'll oblige."

"I'm sorry, my sire." Squidward refused to look his best friend in the eyes.

Both men charged up their soup beams.

Guy Sensei sensed a disturbance as he sat on his Coochie Throne. The Coochkage turned to the left, and adressed his right hand man. The man sitting on a right hand.

"Has Piss Anasui repaired the Thanos Car?" Guy lightly caressed Kira Yoshikage's chin.

"I cannot remember, my love." Kira pulled the left hand from his ass cheeks and pressed it against Guy's right hand. "I will send the fingers in his ass boy."

"Which one?"



Nagito Komaeda and Rohan Kishibe sat in the 4th circle. The game of chess was in Nagito's hands, so was the cheese. 

"Wow Mr. Kishibe..." Komaeda sighed, "I wish you'd stick your fingers in MY ass."

"Too bad I'm a bottom." Rohan knocked out Nagito's Queen, "Besides, you couldn't afford my fingers."

Junko Enoshima jumped into the scene from the ball pit.

"Yass Queen!" She exclaimed as she fell through seven different circles of the Coochie Dungeon and landed in a split ontop of the chess board.

Both men knew what this meant.

Mashed potato orgy in Space Cancun.



"So this is what artificial coochie can do!" Shigaraki flexed his massive butthole. The coochie machines wailed in agony.

"I'll never forget his face." Santa Claus clutched his streeing wheel tight in the left hand of his right hand. "How DARE he fuck my wife! That DAMN green Sasuke." 

Fugo sat in the back, alone. He cried tears, they weren't his. They were Narancia's, Lars's and Josuke Metallica's... They were differenciated by different colors of paint which now dripped onto the flowers Lars had given to Fugo moments before Okuyasu ran him the fuck over.

"He's ready." Kazuichi Diet Coke emerged from the garage, "Gundam Wing Ascenion Gundam ready to give you the femdom."

"My twelve zodiac genitals are ready for cock and ball torture." Gundam Wing Ascenion Gundam ascended to Cock and Ball Torture Ascenion Gundam Wing Ascenion Gundam.

"Not so fast, hetero!" Komaeda and Rohan got fucked up at the Mashed Potaro Orgy.

"Hey Lois." Family Guy bust out of the woodwork, "Remember the time I kicked Rohan Kishibe's ass?"


Tasty Ass?


Guy Sensei got fucked up in the Coochie Dungeon once more. His ascension was needed to protect the order of the Nth Dimension.

He was now Christmas Parade Sourdough Ascenion Guy Sensei.

Rock Lee slapped his ass down in the Divorce Court with Eridan. His fusion with Kirishima was now complete.

"M-A-R-R-I-A-G-E A-S-C-E-N-S-I-O-N A-X-E-L Got it Memorized!?" From the fusion came Axel.

Christmas Parade Sourdough Ascenion Guy Sensei and Axel ascended from the depths of the Divorce Court.

It was time to pound some worm coochie.




It was the past now. Anasui sat alone at Olive Garden waiting for Abbachio to finish fucking tattooed ass for health insurance. He couldn't wait for his tea, so he drank some of Abbachio's.

Wrong move, Narciso. You're pregnant now.


"I can't believe my father and other father concieved me in an Olive Garden!" Kazuichi Diet Piss cried to his therapist, Hohenheim.

"That's how I created my sons too." Hohenheim patted the back of the diet piss boy. "Olive Garden was the Coochie Dungeon before it was cool." Hohenheim slipped on his glasses and jammed to Arctic Monkeys.

"Sir." Kronk walked in holding a bottle of dumb bitch juice, "We just fed this to the fingers in his ass boy."

"Good." Hohenheim smiled, "Any word on Josuke Metallica?"

Kazuichi Diet Sprite sweat nervously, he had fallen in lesbians with the dreaded marsupial. 

"Time to bust out the L word." Hohenheim looked to Kazuichi Dr. Pepper.

"Lesbian?" The Piss goblin shuddered.



Squidward had the upperhand, his eight tentacles shot soup out at critical mass. His prowress was no match for Speedwagon's critical ass. 

Josuke held Okuyasu's hand. He wasn't supposed to be on the field but who gives a shit. 

"Honey have you picked our son up from Art class?" Josuke whispered into Okuyasu's ear.

The Coochie Quaked, the ground shaked and most importantly Jotaro's ass shaked. Real terror filled the hat wearing asshole.

"Rohan Rohan here to give you the femdom!" Artificial Coochie Descion Rohan arose from the Pumpkin Patch with Markiplier, his mouth full of gohan (the actual food and several funko pop figures).

"Yare Yare Daze." Jotaro said. "This is the end of our great days."