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Don't Let Me Wander In The Dark Alone

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They say that your sins never wash away, they always come back to haunt you. At least, his certainly seemed to have.

Ben froze mid-step when he saw the man sitting on his stoop, arms balanced on his knees as he stared down at his hands. As if knowing that Ben had seen him, he raised his head slowly and met his eye. For a beat, Ben remained where he was before, then with great effort he continued walking, hitching his bag further on his shoulder and all the while holding that familiar gaze.

“What are you doing here?” he rasped as he reached the foot of the steps.

“Is that any way to greet your brother?” Kylo unfurled himself slowly, rising to his feet, his stance a mirror of Ben’s; feet apart, chest out, shoulders thrown back. Though, where Ben was all wiry, lean strength, Kylo was broad and brawny. And where Ben’s hair was worn just long enough to cover his damning ears, Kylo’s mane flowed to the top of his shoulders. The eyes though, they had the same liquid eyes that could change colour from amber to a deep whiskey with the ebb and flow of emotion. Right now, Kylo’s were dark and impenetrable. For the first time in a long time, Ben could not read him.

“And here you thought he would be happy to see you.” Ben lifted his eyes to the slim woman lounging at the head of the steps. He hadn't even noticed her, having only eyes for his twin.

“Rey,” he breathed, before turning back to look at Kylo, “I… how did you find me?” Even as he asked, Ben knew the answer. Maz. Of course. He should never have told her.

Kylo nodded, likely seeing the realization on his face, “Yeah, Maz pointed me in this direction. But not before putting me through the wringer.” He broke off and stepped closer, staring hard. “Want to tell me why?”

Ben broke his gaze, eyes flicking up to Rey and then back. It would have come to this, eventually, he supposed. And knowing Kylo, he wouldn’t rest till he got answers out of him. He swallowed hard before nodding towards the door, infusing his voice with false bravado “Let’s get out of this damned cold, shall we? I’m freezing my nuts off out here.”

Rey barked a laugh at his crude remark, “Looks like Benny got himself some rough edges, being on his own.”

“Don’t call me ‘Benny’,” he growled as he stalked past her to open the door and shove it open roughly, stepping into the gloom of the entryway and hoping it would hide the sight of his burning red ears.

“Whatever you say, Benny,” she snarked, following him in with Kylo on her heels. Ben could just hear the shit-eating grin in her voice.

 

*

 

As they entered his apartment, Kylo strolled in, hands shoved in his back pockets, taking in his surroundings. Coming to stop by the full-length, double-paned windows, he tossed a look back over his shoulder at Ben.

“Not too shabby, brother. You’ve got yourself a nice place here.”

Ben didn’t bother answering,  instead tossing his keys on the table and hanging up his coat before walking over to stand next to Kylo. He rubbed his suddenly damp palms on his jeans, before shoving his hands into his pockets, an unconscious echo of his brother.

“So… you in the city for long? Are you and Rey here on holiday?” Maybe if he kept to the mundane, they wouldn’t have to talk about… other things.

Kylo raised his brows and watched him silently for a moment, before playing along, “Naah, I’m only here for a couple days to meet a new prospect. I’m thinking it might be nice to check out the music scene in the city, see if I want to maybe come out here more.”

Ben gave him a sharp look. Kylo had never been interested in coming out East before, preferring the fluidity of what he could do back home. This had nothing to do with music, he would bet his bottom dollar.

Kylo quirked an eyebrow, returning a bland look.

Well, two could play at that game.

“That’s nice, good for you. Where are you guys staying at?” Ben asked as he looked over at Rey, watching as she strolled past his bookcases, trailing her fingers along the shelf indolently, before folding herself onto the leather couch and stretching her long legs out.

She grinned widely at him, before patting the couch, “Why, right here, Benny. Where else would we go?”

What?

Ben swivelled his head in Kylo’s direction to see him smiling smugly. “What, did you think I would come out here and actually go stay in a hotel?” He dropped the smile as he stepped closer to Ben, “Or did you actually think I wouldn’t come here? Wouldn’t come looking for you?”

Ben made an inarticulate sound, his mouth going dry. He shook his head, trying to form words but failing spectacularly.

Kylo looked past him to Rey and gave her a small nod. Behind him, he could hear Rey stand up and walk towards the door.

“Why don’t I leave you boys to get all caught up? I’m going to go take a look around.” She left, closing the door softly behind her.

With her departure, it felt to Ben as though the very air in the room was charged, thrumming with a tension that vibrated along his skin.

Kylo searched his eyes for a moment before sighing. “Ben, Why did you leave? I’ve missed you. I needed my brother, and suddenly you were gone. Why?”

He shook his head, unable to look away from Kylo, shame washing over him.

This was the longest they had ever been apart, having always stuck close to each other even as they pursued wildly different things in Life; always knowing what the other thought, what the other felt. They were like one soul in two bodies, people used to joke. And that had always felt right to Ben. Until, that day, almost a year ago.

“Why did you leave, Ben?” Kylo asked again, softly, as he stepped closer still.

“Don’t pretend you don’t know why!” Ben turned away, gritting his teeth.

Grasping Ben’s chin, Kylo turned him back to look him in the eye. “No. I don’t. Tell me.” It was not a request.

With a jerk, Ben wrenched himself out of his hand, stumbling back a few steps, feeling his control slip away. “What Kylo, what do you want me to say? That I had to leave? That I couldn’t live with the guilt of what I had done to you? Of what I felt? And how wrong it was?”

“And what did you do to me that was so wrong, Ben?” Kylo’s question came out as a whisper, just loud enough to be heard.

Ben sank down on the couch, his head clutched in his hands, pulling at his hair. He shook his head, before looking up, his eyes filled with despair, “I... How can you ask that? What sort of a person… ?” he broke off, unable to continue.

Kylo shook his head in response, “You did nothing wrong” he said, firmly. Recognizing that his brother was not going to be able to say the words, he said them instead, “All you did, Ben, was take care of me. At a time when I was going out of my mind, you helped me, you anchored me.”

“I jerked you off and came all over you while I was doing it! Not six hours after we buried Mom!” Ben shouted, snapping finally, the months of self-flagellation and anguish breaking through his barriers and leaving him raw, exposed.

“And what was wrong with that?”

Ben stared, dumbfounded at his brother’s soft question.

 **

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                                        Benlo-Ch-2-Grinchy-Moodboard

 

Growing up the sons of a single mom, Ben and Kylo had had a whole lot more freedom than their peers. And a whole lot more responsibility, at least where Ben was concerned. He was, after all, the elder even if only by a minute. While Leia, their mother, was always there for them, she also had her hands full keeping the household going, running her restaurant with the help of her old friend, Maz. The boys grew up under Maz's watchful eye, playing in the office, even when Leia was not around. As they matured, Ben learned to shoulder responsibility early on, studying and making his way into the technology field, quickly working his way up in a software company in the Bay Area. Steady, practical and devoted, Ben's life centred around his brother and mother, in that order.

Kylo, on the other hand, had inherited the free-spirit of their absent father. Wildly creative and hated to be tied down to anything structured. And yet, with enough of his mother in him that he was fiercely loyal to his family. It was no surprise to anyone when Kylo pursued Music Technology and Business, starting out as a DJ before eventually going on to become a partner in one of the best clubs in town.

Although they were wildly different in their personalities, interests and professional pursuits, Ben and Kylo remained as close as only two people born in almost the same moment could be, sharing a bond that didn't always need words as they orbited their mother. And while they may have fought and argued, as siblings always did, it never lasted more than a few moments. Their bond was their safety net, an anchor to ground them through any situation.   

It was only after Kylo introduced Leia and him to Rey that Ben began to realize that his brother was growing beyond him, to build a life that didn't always include him. A singer and songwriter, Rey was the perfect foil for Kylo, even Leia had had to admit. Although she had initially been taken aback by the willowy, leather-clad brunette pulling into their driveway on a 1970-era single seater Jawa. The snark and spirit that duelled with and challenged Kylo, at every turn, also hid a depth of kindness and devotion that rivalled his own.  

Leia watched Ben looking at Kylo and Rey, wrapped up in their own little bubble that no longer included him. “He still loves you, you know, that never goes away,” she assured her oldest, smoothing his hair back as he tried to hide the unsettled feeling that coursed through him, “He just also loves her.”

Ben knew it was an irrational feeling, after all, it wasn’t as though Kylo had never had a girlfriend before, even if Ben had stayed clear of the dating scene himself. This, however, somehow, this felt different. Rey… fit Kylo like no one else had before. Apart from Ben.

The day that Leia died had dawned as every other, for Ben. A hurried breakfast with his mom and Kylo, before running out the door to make it in for his 8 am meeting. It was as he made his way back home, daydreaming and making plans for what the trio would do the one day of the week they had persuaded Leia to take time off, that the phone call came in shattering his world.  A ruptured cerebral aneurysm they said, which would have only led to a stroke or other neurological disability in over 60% of the people. Unfortunately, Leia was not one of them, having collapsed in the restaurant during the prep for the evening shift and declared DOA at the hospital.

He barely remembered making the call to Kylo, who was supposed to have gone down to LA with Rey earlier that day. As the phone rang, Ben’s mind whirled, seeking and failing to find the words he needed to tell his brother that life as they had known it was over.

“Hey Benny, on your way home? We made it to Rey’s flight on time, so I’m driving back now. Should take me another couple of hours, tops.” Kylo cheerfully went on before he thought to ask, “What’s up? Why’d you call?”

“Kylo…” Ben’s voice was a broken whisper, and he had to stop for a moment before he managed to say, “It’s Mom… she’s… gone.” He could barely hear his own voice, but he knew Kylo heard him from the deathly silence on the end of the line.

Ben didn’t remember if he said anything else, he barely remembered keying in the details of the hospital on his GPS as he took the freeway exit to desolation.

It was in a state of resounding numbness that Ben got through the next few hours, sorting out what needed to be done at the hospital, making arrangements with the funeral home and everything else. Where he faltered, Maz stepped in and took things over, efficiently and quickly organizing, for the last time, for her friend of over 40 years. Only when Kylo finally made it back home, weeping and shattered in spirit, did Ben break through the vacuum surrounding him to be the strength his brother needed.

No one ever prepared you for how you would feel, after the loss of your mother, your only parent. They just told you how to act and what to do. And while Ben found it in himself to at least make the motions, Kylo could not rouse himself, the harsh truth of Leia's passing splitting him to the bone. Together, and with Ben holding Kylo up almost entirely, they somehow made it through the mundanities of burying a loved one.

After everything was done, and everyone was finally gone, Ben went around the house, checking to make sure the doors were locked, and armed, windows were secured and performing the absurd rituals of a domestic life that are the only things to get you through from one minute to the next when your heart is in ashes inside you. He had insisted that Maz go home, knowing that the strain would weigh heavy on her, much more, possibly, than on the both of them. Having completed his rounds, he paused at the entrance to the living room, seeing Kylo standing silhouetted against the windows of the Mexican-style extension Leia had had put in beyond it. It was the one space that was all hers, with her profusion of indoor plants and books and cosy armchairs.

As Ben watched Kylo swayed, raising a bottle and chugging straight from it, letting go with a faint pop. His shoulders shook, and he swiped the hand that held the bottle against his eyes, succeeding only in spilling the drink on himself. As Kylo cursed wetly, pawing at the damp patch on his shirt, Ben padded up to him and quietly took the bottle out of his hands. Placing it on one the innumerous little tables that dotted the space, crowded with uneven stacks of perpetually half-read books, Ben turned back to see Kylo looking at him in bewilderment, tears streaming down his face.

His heart broke afresh, knowing that for all his brashness and bravado, Kylo had been Leia's little boy and all he wanted in that moment was to find his momma. Shaking his head, as his own tears spilt, Ben wrapped his arms around his brother and held him while they both wept, finally giving rein to the grief ripping through them.

While his own storm eventually abated, Kylo's didn't. At Ben's urging, Kylo finally let himself be led back to his room, where Ben pushed his night clothes in his hand and propelled him into the bathroom. When Ben made to step back, Kylo's hand shot out and grabbed his wrist, and he mutely shook his head. Ben didn't need words to understand that Kylo did not want to be left alone, knowing the visceral fear that ripped at him that perhaps he may lose the only other person left to him. He knew because the same irrational fear thrummed through him as well, crowding and surrounding the void that the loss of Leia had left. Only, he masked it better. He had to. For Kylo's sake.

So, he stayed.

 

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                                         Benlo-Ch-3-Grinchy-Moodboard

 

Being twins, Ben and Kylo had grown up in the knowledge that they shared everything. Even their bodies, up to an age, were the same— mirrors of one another. There were no superfluous trappings of modesty or shame. How could there be, when they were the same, and had been shaped from the same source at the same time?  

There had never been any fuss made about stripping in front of the other, sharing a shower or swimming in the nude together. They had only stopped the practice after Rey had come into Kylo's life and Ben had become, more often than not, the inadvertent third wheel. So, he stepped back and gave his brother his space.

Now, however, space was not what Kylo wanted, or needed. Stripping out of his own clothes, Ben helped Kylo get out of his alcohol-splattered clothing and steered him to the shower stall that spanned a good half of the large bathroom. Since both of them were so largely-built, it had been a luxury to finally have the spaces around them expanded to fit their needs growing up — a lasting reminder of the thoughtfulness of their mother.

Much as he may have wanted to lose himself in the memories of Leia, Ben pushed them from his mind, so that he could function long enough to take care of Kylo. When the spray of water from the multi-jets started to run hot, he pushed Kylo to stand under them as he grabbed the shampoo and proceeded to work it into Kylo's hair. Smoothing the lather through the long strands of hair, so much like his own and yet so different, Ben examined his brother's face. Kylo stood there, limp, eyes eerily blank, as he gave in to Ben's ministrations, not responding the whole time that he was being bathed, letting his older brother take care of him.

It was only after Ben had rinsed him off, and was turning to wash the suds off himself, that Kylo broke his silence with a sob and wrapped him in a hug. Again, Ben held Kylo close, tucking his head under his chin, and rocking him as they stood under the hot flow of water, steam rising around them. He didn't know if the wetness flowing down his chest was from the shower or from Kylo's weeping, and he didn't care. He didn't want anything but to be able to sooth the jagged pain his brother bore; it was killing him to see Kylo like this.

Bending his head, Ben dropped a kiss on top of Kylo's head, crooning as he did so. It was something they had done as boys, when one or the other had woken terrified from a nightmare - held each other and slept, humming their comfort. As Kylo tightened his arms in response, pulling him closer, Ben softly kissed the top of his shoulder. Soon, he was pressing kisses wherever he could reach, feeling Kylo's turbulence abating, slowing.

When Ben lifted his head, Kylo pressed his face close and moaned against his neck. Ben couldn't help the shudder that ran through him at the feel of his brother's lips ghosting against his throat, and he reflexively clutched Kylo closer, if that was at all possible. The movement brought their hips flush against each other, and Ben could feel Kylo's cock hanging heavy and throbbing against his own. The friction caused an unexpected frission of delight to run through him, and Ben's head dropped back with a gasp. Like a puppy blindly seeking comfort, Kylo homed in on Ben's bared throat and pressed an open-mouthed kiss there, scraping his teeth along the cords of his neck as he did. Ben gripped Kylo's hair and pulled him back, breathing in harsh pants as he took in his brother's eyes glittering and half-lidded. But no longer dead.

Though lost in his own haze, Ben's instincts told him that if he could just help Kylo feel alive again, then maybe, maybe they could begin to heal, together. That, more than anything else decided him, in that moment. Pulling Kylo back to him, Ben dropped his lips over his, kissing him with desperation. Kylo moaned into his mouth, giving Ben the access he needed to sweep his tongue in, deepening the kiss till he felt Kylo kiss him back. As they warred with each other, Ben could feel himself become painfully hard, his cock now jutting upward and curving into Kylo's stomach. It felt good to rub up against his skin, against the body that was no different from his own, really. So good. Needing to share that, wanting Kylo to feel just as good, Ben dropped his hand between them and wrapped his fist around Kylo's cock, feeling it jerk at the touch of his hand. Kylo was quickly coming erect, becoming as hard as he was himself. Ben twisted his fist, letting the mix of water and precum lubricate them. Kylo began thrusting his hips lightly at first and then with increasing force, as he gripped Ben' face his hands and drank him in.

Ripping away from their kiss Ben watched as Kylo's eyes slipped shut and his head fell back, his arms lowering to clutch at Ben's shoulders. Ben dropped his other hand to cup Kylo's balls. He was sure he would know when Kylo was close, much as he knew his own tipping point. So Ben knew when to tug, where to stroke and how to tighten his fingers as he fisted his brother in the shower. He knew when he felt Kylo's balls tighten, that his release was close. A sense of joy ran through him, a knowledge that he was going to make Kylo feel so very good. It was enough to bring him close to the same edge that he was pushing his brother towards, rutting up against his body. Then, Kylo let out a low cry and stiffened, his arms tightening around Ben as he pulsed and came hard all over his hands. And as Kylo toppled over the edge, so did Ben, painting his brother's stomach with his spend.

 

Chapter Text

Ben stared at his brother in disbelief. What Kylo was saying, what it meant… then all these months of self-flagellation, of separation… but, how could he accept that he hadn't been wrong to do what he did?

He shook his head, knowing he couldn't let himself believe that there was even one thing right about him or what had happened. Before he could say a word, though, Kylo leaned forward and placed a finger on Ben's lips.

“No, don't. I need you to listen to me, not do what you always do and fucking overthink things.” His voice was sharp before he sighed and continued, “There's nothing wrong with you. Or with me. There's no difference between us. You and me? We're two parts of one whole person, Benny. I would have done the same for you if it had been the other way around. I don't hate you, I'm not angry with you. I want you back, not living across the fucking country from me. I need you, Ben. I can't make it without you. You hear me?”

As always, Kylo could see to the heart of his thoughts, knowing what anxiety had him in its fist. There was no judgement on Kylo's face, no accusation. Then, kneeling in front of Ben, Kylo cupped his face in both his hands, stroking a thumb over his cheek as he leaned in close.

“You know something else? You're not alone… I feel it too.” Kylo's eyes flicked down to Ben's lips before coming back and spearing him with a look that held a storm of emotion as he laid himself bare.  

Despite himself, Ben caught his breath, unable to tear his eyes away. He could only watch, a strange anticipation coiling in his gut, as Kylo closed the distance between them, capturing his lips in a soft kiss. It was like a wash of cool peace flooding his veins, as he felt all the acceptance, the forgiveness, the love that Kylo was trying to show him.

For the first time in almost a year, Ben felt that constant tightness in his chest ease, letting him breathe, letting him feel. With a sob he opened his mouth to Kylo, letting his brother in, letting him catch him as he fell headlong into whatever this was between them.

And Kylo didn't let him fall far, or alone. Moaning as he felt Ben respond, Kylo deepened the kiss, tasting, taking whatever Ben was willing to give him. Which at this point was whatever he wanted.

Just as Ben was reaching up to tug Kylo closer, the sound of the front door opening made him pull abruptly back, reality crashing in like a bucket of ice dropped down his neck. He whipped around to see that Rey had come back in, shutting the door behind her, and was leaning against it with her arms crossed, an indescribable expression on her face. Ben stared between her and Kylo, horror dropping a cold and heavy weight in his gut as he realized she had seen what they’d been doing. And then, just as quickly as it had left, that hated, familiar tightness was back, crushing his lungs in its hold.

He had to get out, he couldn’t do this. He had to leave before he made any more mistakes, screwed things up any more than he already had.

Surging up off the couch, Ben pushed past Kylo and made for the door, ignoring his brother calling him to come back. He paused by Rey, opening his mouth to say… something… anything … but he had nothing. Wordlessly shaking his head, he burst out of the apartment, letting the door slam shut behind him.  

His forward momentum petered out as he ran out onto the stoop, the frigid air of the late evening slapping him in the face. Stumbling forward till he hit the railings, Ben wrapped his trembling hands around the wooden column to lean his head against it, his breathing ragged as he tried to drag air in.

What was he doing? What the hell was he doing? Oh, God, and Rey! How could he forget about Rey? She was going to hate him. And Kylo. Oh, God! What if she left Kylo? What had he done?

Hearing the sound of footsteps, coming through the doorway, Ben gripped the column harder, working up the courage to say what he had to, to Kylo.

“Stop, don't come near me.”

Thankfully there was silence behind him, letting him continue, “I'm sorry, I just keep making things worse. You should leave. Just… go. Go back home.”

The boards creaked as the footsteps came closer, stopping so close to him he could feel his back warming.

“Kylo, don't do this… I couldn't bear it if you lost Rey as well, and because of me.” Ben closed his eyes, feeling the old despair wash over him, but knowing it was the right thing to do.

“Don't you think that's my decision to make?”

Ben spun around at the sound of Rey's voice.

“I…”

“What makes you think you can tell him, or me, what to do? You don't get to decide, Ben. Not when it was your leaving that almost broke Kylo.” She jabbed a finger in his chest as she glared up at him.

Mutely, Ben shook his head. He never meant to hurt Kylo. Hell, he'd left just so he didn't .

Rey wasn't finished though, pushing harder against his chest till he was leaning backwards, away from her bruising finger. Not that he was going to complain; he deserved anything and more she chose to dish out.

“Do you know what it's like to see the man you love fall apart because he feels incomplete ? Do you know how it feels to watch guilt tear him apart while he tries to figure out what he did wrong that he lost his family in one day?”

Her voice was thickening, tears casting a sheen to her angry eyes as she slapped a hand against Ben's chest, hard enough that he reached up and grabbed it, despite his intentions to quietly take the punishment. “Do you fucking know what it feels like to realise that you will never be enough to fill that void in him?”

“Rey, no…” Ben whispered, his heart breaking inside him as she recounted just about everything he'd hoped to avoid.

“You listen to me, Ben Solo. You and I both know that Kylo is the best thing in our lives. So you're going to come back in there with me, and you're going to help make him whole again.”

Ben reeled, hearing the words but not making sense of them as he gaped at Rey. Opening his mouth to answer her, he broke off with a grunt as she dug the fingers of her trapped hand into this chest, the nails biting even through the shirt he was wearing. He instinctively tightened his hold on her hand, to keep her from inflicting more damage.

“No, I don't want to hear it.” She shook her head, eyes glistening, voice hard. “Don’t tell me some shit about being wrong. You broke him, you fix him. That's it. I just want my Kylo back.” And then, as the tears spilt over, her fingers eased their hold on him, her head hanging forward till it rested on his chest.

Ben wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him. It shook him to see her cry - in all the time he'd known her, not once had there ever been tears or any sort of an emotional outburst. That she was not only currently sniffing against his chest but seemed to be suggesting what he thought she was...

Before he could stop himself, he was asking, “What do you need me to do, Rey. Tell me what you want.”

She stilled against him for a moment before saying in a low voice, “You know what you have to do, Ben. Come back to Kylo.” She raised her head and searched his eyes, “Come back to us.”

He drew his breath in sharply, reflexively clutching her tighter. “Do you know what you're saying, Rey?”

She pulled herself out of his arms and fixed him with a look. “Yes, Benny, I know. And I know what happened between you.” The use of Kylo's name for him wasn't accidental, or snark, he realised that now. She did know what she was asking him to do.

Softening, Rey reached for Ben's hand. “Did you think I would cut and run?” She shook her head. “Kylo is who I want to be with, and if that means I share him with you, for him to be whole, then that's just what we'll have to do.”

And just like that, Rey took control of the biggest fear in Ben's life and made it as nothing. Still holding his hand she turned,  leading him back inside, and he let her.



***













Chapter Text

 

At the sound of them entering, Kylo spun around from where he was pacing near the windows. He stood almost vibrating with tension as he eyed Ben and Rey, taking in their clasped hands while chewing on the corner of his lip, a nervous tic that was making a reappearance. Kylo watched silently as Ben exchanged a quick look with Rey before dropping her hand. Toeing off his shoes, Ben padded up to Kylo, pausing only when he was right up in his face. Raising a hand to grip the back of Kylo's neck, Ben searched his eyes.

“I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you.” Ben's voice was low, but sincere. Whatever Rey had said to him… Kylo looked past Ben to find his girlfriend watching them, a hand clasped over her mouth, her eyes intent.

“Kylo, are you sure you want this?” The sound of Ben's quiet question had his eyes snapping back to his brother.

“Are you? Or are you going to run from me again?” he countered.

Ben closed his eyes and dropped his head, tightening his hold on Kylo, “I guess I deserved that.” he whispered.

Are you?” Kylo couldn’t help asking again, roughly, feeling that familiar desperation rise. When he had woken up that day, after the funeral, to find that Ben had fled, leaving him alone for the first time in his life… and then again, not even a few minutes earlier… Kylo finally understood what it meant to be so desperate for something, for someone, you couldn’t breathe. Before it could spiral, consuming him as it had all those months ago, Ben lifted his head, his eyes bright, and nodded.

“I’m not running, I’m right here.” His voice rang with a clarity it had lacked before he'd bolted out the door.

“I’m right here.” Ben whispered again, shifting his hand to hold the back of Kylo’s head as he leaned forward and took his lips in a hard kiss. Kylo didn’t hesitate to pull Ben close, his own hand fisting in his brother’s shorter hair, letting him feel the depth of his anger, his want. It was a war of teeth and tongues, as the two of them fought for a balance that had been lost. It slowed into a soothing of lips and exchanged breath as they swayed together, finally breaking apart. When Ben wrapped his arms around him, Kylo tucked his head into his brother’s neck, accepting the apology and letting a sense of belonging wash over him.  

At a light touch on his arm, Kylo raised his head to see Rey standing next to them, watching him quietly, but with a question written large on her face. They had talked about this on their way into the city - what to do if Ben agreed. How to proceed if he didn't. Well, they didn't need to worry about the latter now, but he did need to reassure Rey. He'd put her through a lot while he fought his way back to the surface and truth be told, she was probably the only reason he hadn't drowned in depression.

Untangling himself from Ben, but still keeping a hold of him with one arm, Kylo drew Rey close, pressing a kiss to her forehead. She sighed and snuggled in close, pressing her face into his chest. For a moment they stood like that, the three of them connected as a unit, before Rey raised her head and nosed at Kylo's neck, nipping him lightly.

Chuckling darkly, Kylo smiled down at her, “Straight for the jugular, babe?”

She returned a wicked smirk before reaching up to pull the first button on his shirt open, “You want this, don't you? So, why wait?”

“Why wait indeed.” Kylo turned to his brother, reaching up to cup his jaw, smoothing a thumb over Ben's full lips as he did.

Ben's eyes were glittering, darkening as he opened his mouth to bite at the digit, teasing him before softly sucking it into his wet warmth. The sensation sent need arrowing through Kylo, the heat pooling in his gut as his twin looked at him in silent promise.

With a groan Kylo pulled him into a hungry kiss, clutching Ben close like he was a lifeline. He barely felt Rey's fingers continue to softly unbutton his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders. He did feel the open-mouthed kiss she placed across his back as her hands slipped around his waist. Shivering in response he turned his head from Ben to mouth at Rey. As she leaned up to kiss him, running her tongue against the seam of his mouth, Kylo could feel Ben kissing his neck, sucking hard enough to leave a bruise.

The dual assault was unlike anything Kylo had ever felt before - the softness of his girlfriend against his back, while his brother's hard body pressed up against his front. And speaking of hard, Kylo could feel Ben's insistent length against his stomach, a mirror of his own hot arousal. As Rey buried her fingers in his hair, holding him as she ravaged his mouth, Kylo shuddered at the feel of Ben trailing his fingers down to unbutton his jeans while his mouth teased across Kylo's bared chest.

When Ben cupped him through the jeans, Kylo moaned into Rey's mouth, his hips jerking in response. Feeling like he was drugged, Kylo pulled away from the pair of them, wiping his wet mouth against the back of his hand.

Knowing how disheveled he must look, Kylo pointed at them both, “Let's even this up, you need to lose some clothes…”

Smirking Rey cut a glance at Ben, before whipping her top off and shaking her hair loose. “C'mon Benny, let's see some skin,” she drawled, sauntering up to Kylo before turning to present her back to him, “Help me out of this?”

Growling, Kylo flicked the bra open and pulled it off of her. Cupping her freed breasts in his hands, he hauled Rey back against him and bent to kiss her neck. Moaning, she arched into his palms, winding her arms up around his neck. Kylo ground his hardness against her ass while he eyed his brother.

As he watched, Ben pulled his shirt open, baring his skin to Kylo for the first time in almost a year. With a pang, Kylo realised how much weight Ben had lost, the once well-defined planes of his pecs and abs having shrunk in the months that had passed. When Ben went to undo his pants, Kylo gently put Rey aside, pressing a soft kiss of apology to her. He wanted to be the one to undress Ben. He'd imagined this, hoped for this for far too long.

Brushing Ben's hands aside, Kylo gave in to his need to touch him, stroking his hands over Ben's chest. Bending, he pressed a soft kiss to the muscle over his heart, trailing his lips down to suck at Ben's nipple. When Kylo used his teeth, Ben clutched at him, pressing into his mouth with a gasp.

The response was gratifying, knowing he could make Ben feel just as desperate as he was.

Leaning back in Ben's grasp, Kylo held his eyes as he slowly unfastened his pants, drawing the zipper down and pushing the fabric off his hips. Ben's pupils were blown, his mouth open as he drew harsh breaths, openly shivering as Kylo snagged his boxers and peeled them down, releasing his erection.

Looking down between them, Kylo lightly traced Ben's cock with the tips of his fingers. He hadn't realized just how similar they were in that aspect. Wrapping his fingers around Ben, Kylo pumped him just as he liked himself, running his thumb over his bedewed slit. Moaning, Ben thrust roughly into Kylo's hand, his head dropping back in submission.

“Shhh, not so fast Benny,” Kylo crooned, releasing him and slipping a hand up to fist in Ben's hair,  bending to his ear, “we want this to last don't we?”

“I just… Kylo…” Ben gasped incoherently when Kylo nipped at his ear lobe, sucking it lightly.

“Look at you, how long have you wanted this?” Kylo growled, pulling Ben's head back by his hair. Irrationally, he could feel the hurt and anger coming back - he'd spent so much time feeling unwanted and, yet, here was Ben practically writhing at his touch. So much damned time wasted.

“Too long… please...” Ben tugged at Kylo, trying to close the distance between them, but Kylo's grip was tight, making Ben wince.

“Damned straight too long, Benny. You’re never leaving me again, you hear me?”

“Babe, you're hurting him.  Benny's here, he's not going to leave you,” Rey soothed as she ran her hands over Kylo's shoulders, hugging him from behind, “Why don't we show him what he's been missing?”

Reaching up, she tugged Kylo's fingers loose before spinning him around and pushing him backwards into Ben. Kylo let her take control, feeling arms come up to encircle him from behind, pressing his head back onto Ben's shoulder, baring his neck to his brother’s lips. Rey knelt, pushing Kylo's jeans and underwear down at one go, helping him pull his feet out before tossing his clothes away. Then she leaned in and blew over Kylo's engorged cock, wrapping a slim hand along his length before taking him in her mouth. As Kylo groaned and bucked his hips, Rey drew back slowly, hollowing her cheeks as she did. With a pop she released him and pressed a kiss to the head as she held him in her small hand.

“How about we get comfortable?” she asked huskily as Kylo slowly opened his eyes.

Ben lifted his head from where he was nibbling at Kylo's neck to nod towards a door. “The bedroom.”

Unwrapping himself from Kylo, Ben took his hand and led him to the room. Not wanting her to be left out, Kylo looked back over his shoulder at Rey to see her stepping out of the rest of her clothes before following them with a quiet smile in his direction.

“Go on, babe, right behind you.” The heated look in her eyes was more than Kylo had any right to hope for, and yet here she was, his beautiful girl, apparently anticipating what was to come almost as much as he was.

Entering the room, and flipping on a few dim lights, Ben led Kylo over to the bed and motioned for him to get on. Kylo stared, the confidence Ben was suddenly exuding making itself known even through his arousal. Ben smiled at him, leaning in to kiss him slowly, sucking at Kylo's lip before releasing him.

“I'm not afraid to want you anymore.” he whispered - of course Ben could sense what had flitted through Kylo's mind. This is what Kylo had missed, the connection, the bond, and now…

Now, he let himself be pushed back onto the bed and watched with a thudding heart as Ben climbed out of the rest of his clothes.

Rey came up and paused, taking in the sight of his nakedness before she looked Ben up and down. Kylo couldn't help the little thrill that ran through him at the sight of his girlfriend eyeing his brother. Apparently, Ben was equally as  affected by the scrutiny if the little jerk his cock gave was any indication. Flushing deeply, Ben looked up at Kylo, almost as though he was afraid of how he might react.

Kylo held his gaze, the heat coiling in his gut as he thought about the idea of Ben and Rey together - it wasn’t where they had started to go, but it may be where they ended up. And Kylo found that rather than be turned off by it, he was heading in quite the opposite direction. Taking himself in hand, he stroked slowly, still looking at Ben as he let a small smirk curl. Cutting his eyes to Rey, he was not surprised to see her looking between both of them, her eyes blown wide, breathing shallow as she dealt with the new development. Kylo knew she had been so focused on him, and his needs, she had probably not thought forward to what her own reactions would be. And considering that Ben was almost a facsimile of himself… Kylo could see the moment that the thought settled into her mind, as her eyes dropped first to his lazily moving fist and then to Ben’s equally turgid length.

“See something you like?” he asked her softly, making her eyes snap back up to his as she flushed in response. Quickly thrusting what she’d been holding at Ben, Rey climbed onto the bed, straddling Kylo as she bent to kiss him. Running his hands up to squeeze her breasts, Kylo could feel her heart beating rapidly under his fingers, her pebbled nipples pressing into his palms and her core drenched where she rocked her hips against him. He smoothed a hand down her body to touch her, his breath catching as his fingers slipped slowly into her wetness making her moan into his mouth.

Breaking away, Kylo searched her eyes before leaning up to press his forehead against hers. “It’s okay Rey, whatever you want…” he told her, watching as the understanding dawned in her eyes; as he told her just how alright he was with the situation.

Shaking her head, Rey resolutely pressed him back to lie on the bed, trailing her fingers down to his throbbing length, “This isn’t about me, babe.” For a moment as she held his eyes, Kylo could see a hint of the vulnerability she kept so well hidden from everyone else, before she was turning back to Ben, who was looking down at the bottle of lube and condoms she had pressed into his hands. Rey put her head on the side as she asked, “How do you want this? Do you want Ben to fuck you? Or...?”

Kylo held his breath - he knew what he wanted, but whether it was something Ben was willing to give him, that he needed to hear for himself. Even now, even with his brother standing naked in front of him, Kylo felt that old fear tighten inside him.

“Ben?” He asked, more than one question colouring the simple query.

Ben’s head reared up, his eyes glittering black, a muscle jumping in his jaw as he looked at Kylo for a moment, before he nodded - Kylo could see that Ben knew what he was asking. “I want you, Kylo. Get on your hands and knees...”

The quiet, firm declaration left Kylo breathless - he knew what was coming, had prepared for it even. But to hear his brother actually declare it, demand it … the tightness in his chest eased, giving way to a whole different type of coiling.

Rey quickly scrambled off of Kylo, giving him room to roll over and get up on his knees. As she settled back against the headboard, Kylo took her hand and kissed it before drawing it down to her pussy. Holding his gaze, Rey let her fingers circle her clit, dipping them in her opening. Her eyes flicked to Ben, a visible shiver running through her as her digits slowly pushed in.

Looking back over his shoulder Kylo shuddered at the look of blatant need written across Ben’s face, knowing it must be mirrored on his as well. He let Ben gently push at his shoulder, catching himself on his hands as he fell forward. Kylo gritted his teeth as he felt Ben run a hand over his back, slowing over the globes of his ass. His cheeks clenched as Ben suddenly pressed himself close, leaning over to kiss his way down Kylo’s spine.

He could feel Ben, hot, hard, pressed against his ass, so close to where he wanted him. The next sensation was that of lube trickling over his opening, as Ben slowly rubbed it in, letting his thumb circle him. Kylo bucked back against Ben, impatient after all the waiting, wanting, needing more.

“Shhh, Kylo... I got you…”

Ben reached around and took Kylo in hand, smearing the lube over his cock, pumping him a couple times before beckoning to Rey. He directed her to get on all fours in front of Kylo and stepped back, as Kylo pulled her hips against his.

"Can you take me, baby?” he whispered hoarsely in her ears, his fingers taking over from hers, thumbing her clit as his index and pointer fingers sank in, feeling her walls pull him in. As she frantically nodded, Kylo took his cock in hand, rocking against her before  guiding himself into her opening, letting them slot into each other as naturally as they always had. Rey moaned as Kylo sank into her, his grip tight at her hips as he filled her wet heat. The sensation of having her clench around him was not new, but everything about what they were doing was shooting sparks into his bloodstream, spiking his desire.

When Ben finally put his hands back on him, Kylo was ready to jump out of his skin. Fucking Rey was mind-blowing, but the anticipation of being fucked by Ben was something else.

Kylo paused, breathing harshly as he leaned over Rey, trying to relax as Ben slowly, slowly pushed his way in, breaching Kylo's not-so-virgin ass. However full he thought he'd ever been, with what he and Rey had tried in the past, nothing compared to being spitted by Ben, his brother's cock as massive as his own. Perhaps this is how Rey felt, Kylo thought deliriously, groaning as Ben sheathed himself inch by inch. Full, so full… like Ben was a very part of him, inside and out.

When Ben was finally seated all the way, he paused with his hips pressed hard against Kylo, panting from the exertion. If he didn't move, Kylo was certain he was going to die, the coiling in his gut ready to snap. Almost as though he knew what Kylo needed, and perhaps he did, Ben grasped him tightly and started to rut into him. The force of his thrusts were driving Kylo into Rey, the rhythm making it seem almost as though it were Ben who was fucking her. Almost. Again, the thought took Kylo's breath away, what little he had left from the pounding he was receiving.

Just when he could take no more, when it was all too much for him, sensation rippling across his skin, Kylo came hard, harder than he'd ever before. As he shattered, he could feel Rey squeezing the cum out of him as she followed him over the crest, and Ben collapsing on him as he painted Kylo with his hot spend. The feeling was enough to make Kylo's vision white out as he was clutched between the two people he loved.

Returning slowly to his body, Kylo became aware of the breath sawing in and out of his lungs, as though after a great race, and a tangle of limbs embracing him as he lay there.

He'd never felt so wrecked, or so satisfied, in his entire life.

There was no going back from this, Kylo thought dimly, pulling the arms closer around him as he closed his eyes and slipped into an exhausted sleep, mind and body finally at rest.

 

***

Chapter Text

 

As the early morning light filtered in through the blinds, Rey stirred in the nest of limbs they had slept in the night before. Feeling the weight pressing down on her, she blinked slowly and looked to see who was wrapped around her. Kylo had his arm slung about her with his head cushioned on her chest - a position he invariably ended up in at some point in the night.

What was surprising was Ben, who bracketed her on the other side, his face tucked into her neck while his arm stretched out across her, his hand tangled in Kylo's hair. It looked like they had all moved around during the night, though she was sure nothing else had happened. As the memory of what they'd done filtered through her mind, Rey looked down at the twins who held her between them, finding herself stirring at the thought of doing that again. Or anything else, really. Just, the three of them - together.

When she and Kylo had walked down this path, it had been about him -  she hadn't expected to find herself feeling as drawn to Ben as she evidently was. While it wasn't exactly a bad thing, Rey liked to think things through and know where she stood in her own mind before committing to a course of action. A lifetime of fending for herself had made her wary of jumping at decisions.

Needing the mindspace, now that her thoughts had headed down that path, she slowly eased out from between the brothers, gently shifting one and then the other onto their backs. As she crawled over Ben to get off the bed, his eyes fluttered open and he made to reach for her.

"Shhh… go back to sleep. I just need the loo." Whispering, Rey slung her legs over his massive ones and slipped off the edge of the bed, pausing to look down at him as he snagged her wrist and gave her a sleepy smile before letting her go with an indecipherable mumble. His eyes slipped closed and his breathing evened out, his face peaceful with just a hint of that smile remaining. Rey didn't know what to make of the little jump in her chest at the sight of such apparent contentment.

On the other side of the bed, Kylo rolled back over, a faint smile painting his face as his fingers reached for and met Ben's warmth.

Feeling suddenly like she was intruding, and remembering her own need to ruminate, she left the brothers to their slumber and slipped into the bathroom.

Standing under the pounding spray, in the glassed-off shower area, she tried to sort through what she was feeling. Her attraction to Ben had hit her like a sledgehammer, but there was no denying her visceral response to seeing him naked, watching him pleasure Kylo.

She'd always respected Ben—her boyfriend's quiet, seemingly-shy twin—even while she'd ribbed him hard and given him attitude. That was just the way she was. Only Kylo had ever broken past her barriers to the softness inside. The very softness that helped her see the answer to his suffering in the months after Leia's passing. It hadn't been easy for her to get Kylo talking about his attraction, his connection to Ben, or to convince him that she really didn't have a problem with him exploring that, if he could get Ben to agree. Yet, it hadn't been difficult considering how painful the alternative was - a Kylo with a hollow, empty space in him that she could never fill. It had never been her's to fill; she knew she occupied a very different place in his heart.

Seeing the contentment on both their faces, remembering Ben's involuntary reaction to her, and the warmth that had bloomed in her at the sight - it now appeared she may have a very similar capacity to hold both of them close to her. As intense as the sex had been, she knew in her gut that it had been more than the brothers scratching an itch. They had found a new balance, and one that included her. She just needed to be sure she was ready for that.

Rey's mind wandered to their exertions of the night before, lingering on Ben. Her mouth ran dry as she recalled the play of his strong limbs, his sleek muscles, his body very different from and yet just as beautiful as Kylo's. As the water sluiced down her body, she could feel another part of her getting as wet at the memory. Slowly, her heart beating hard as she did, she let her hand wander over her skin as she closed her eyes and visualised the brothers, visualised Ben. It was his eyes she imagined holding hers as her fingers slipped down to her core, stroking the slick wetness, her breath catching as how sensitive and ready she felt. From just the memory.

Rey groaned as she pushed two fingers into herself, whining as she realized it wasn't enough, she  wasn't enough. She wanted, no, needed more.

Lost in sensation, and deafened by the sound of the water still pounding around her, she didn't hear the door opening or the footsteps padding towards her, until the shower door slid open.

"Are you oka-" Ben's voice choked off.

With a gasp, she whipped her head around to see him standing there, a hand braced against the glass, his mouth still open in mid-speech, his gaze riveted where her fingers disappeared inside her.

As she stood, frozen, his eyes tracked upwards over her glistening skin, somehow making her feel even more exposed than the night before, even though everyone had seen everything. When he finally found her eyes, it took her breath away to see how his darkened, filling with a fire she'd only even seen in Kylo's. That she could elicit that response from Ben, who was responsible for her current state, made Rey shudder with a depth of need she didn't know she could feel.

Turning to face him, she backed up against the walls, and slowly pumped her fingers in her wetness before drawing them out and proffering them to him. There was no hesitation in her, not when she'd sorted through her own feelings. This wasn't something she needed to run past Kylo or seek his blessings on - not after the journey they'd been on, heading to where they were now.

Ben held her eyes for a long moment, his nostrils flaring as his grip on the edge of the door tightened. He looked down at the slick digits she was offering him, slowly being washed clean by the onslaught of water. Still, he stood at the door staring, while his cock twitched and stiffened.

"Go on, you know you want to."

Ben's head reared up at the sound of Kylo's soft proclamation. The twins locked eyes for a heartbeat before Ben was moving, like a bull released from his chute, crashing to his knees in front of her and enveloping her fingers in his hot, wet mouth. He moaned as he sucked her clean, his tongue dancing over her fingers as he laved them, his one hand wrapped around her wrist while the other gripped her hip.

Looking up from the sight of Ben lost in the taste of her, Kylo smiled faintly at Rey. There was no need for words between them, the understanding settling around them like a warm blanket. This, this was exactly what Kylo had hoped would happen even if he didn't say it in as many words. But then, no one could read him like she'd learned to.

Right now, not only was the sight of his brother and his—their?—girlfriend something that making him happy, it seemed to be making parts of him very happy. Rey watched him absently reach down to stroke his hardening cock as he kept his eyes on her.

Smiling softly, letting him see all the love she held in her eyes, she stretched her other hand out to him, beckoning him in.

Gently, he shook his head and nodded down at Ben. Of course, he wanted her to take care of him first. Lowering her hand to sweep back Ben's wet curls, she threaded her fingers through them as she drew her fingers out of his mouth, smiling at Ben's sound of protest.

"There's more where that came from, Benny. Don't you want to taste the rest?" She asked, teasingly.

He shouldn't have looked so wrecked from just sucking on her fingers, but his eyes were wild, his lips red and wet as he breathed hard through his mouth.

"Oh god, yes!" He groaned, "Can I?"

The look of ridiculous hope in his eyes made her want to wrap him up and keep him safe - with a jolt she realized that she'd never seen Ben with a woman. What if… ?

Her jaw dropped as she looked down at him, her fingers gentling as they slipped from his hair to cup his face.

"Ben, have you ever…? Is this…?" She didn't need to finish her question to read the fierce blush that stained his cheeks.

"How have you never?" She asked him, wonderingly. Even a blind woman could not be immune to the charm of Ben Solo, much less the body he sported.

Looking away he mumbled, as his grip flexed on her hip, "I never found anyone I wanted to… you know."

With a grin, she turned his face back to face her, "Oh, I think we are way past being shy with each other, Benny boy." Then, her voice softening, she continued, "If you want to, with me Ben, I'd love to be your first."

"I… of course, I want you." he gulped hard, seeming to realize he'd just said that to Kylo's girlfriend and tossed a quick, nervous look over his shoulder.

"Whatever you want, Benny…" Kylo was still smiling down at him, his eyes soft, "However you want us."

Having received the affirmation he was seeking, Ben turned back to Rey who was tugging him to stand up. As he gained his feet, she drew him close, wrapping an arm around his neck as she grinned up at him before leaning in to nip at his lips.

With a growl, he pressed her back against the shower walls, a hand slipping up to cradle her head as he mashed their lips together. All her mirth was wiped away in the fire that swept through her at his kiss. He may not have been with a woman, before, but Ben sure as hell knew what he was doing as he kissed her senseless, his tongue licking into her, demanding and giving in equal measure.  His hips pressing into her hid nothing of his straining erection, rock hard against the softness of her belly, prompting Rey to shift against him, reaching down to grip his ass and pull him even closer.

In a move that surprised a squeal out of her, Ben hoisted her, holding her weight up with one arm as he pulled her legs around his waist, groaning as her wet heat rubbed against him, his cock slotting under her.

Abruptly, the water beating down on them stopped, not that either of them noticed until Kylo tapped Ben on the shoulder, as he chuckled darkly, "It may be safer to take this back into the bedroom. I don't want either of you to slip and crack your skulls!"

Breathing hard, Ben and Rey looked at each other and then she nodded as she tightened her arms and legs around him, secure as he turned and walked out of the bathroom. Neither of them cared that they were dripping wet as he slowly lowered her to the bed.

Stroking his hands lightly over her, he knelt by the side of the bed and parted her legs, his eyes riveted on her exposed pussy. Leaning forward he gently blew a breathe across her wet lips as he held her thighs, thumbs stroking against the insides in a way that made her tremble. Her chest heaving, Rey lifted her head to watch as Ben nosed at her, breathing her in before he locked eyes with her and licked at her in a broad stripe. Cursing, she dropped her head back, hands reaching to clutch at his head as Ben went to town on her, licking and sucking as though he couldn't get enough of her. Just when she was sure she couldn't take anymore, and needed him to up the ante, he arrowed his tongue into her, pushing up her channel in anyway that made her buck her hips.

"God, Ben… please!" She thrashed under him, making him sling a heavy arm across her, anchoring her as he fucked her with his tongue, his eyes never leaving her face.

"Please, Ben! Please, baby… I need-" her sobs morphed into a piercing cry as he pulled back only to push a thick finger into her. At Kylo's quiet urging, Ben transferred his lips to suck on her clit.

"Jesus, Ben! Oh, more!" she begged and he gave it to her, working in a second finger and slowly pumping them, lightly scissoring and curling them in a bid to widen her opening. The fullness was different from when Kylo fingered her, though not as much as when his cock was in her. It didn't stop the pleasure from winding out from her core, tightening in a growing spiral of sensation till she was spasming around him, coming hard as he kept up his assault.

As she came down, she made a light sound of protest as he continued despite the heightened sensitivity. Opening languid eyes, she watched Kylo, whom they'd all but forgotten, step up to gently pull Ben back from her and indicate that he should get on the bed.

Ben scooped her in his arms and shifted till she rested on the pillows. Then, he settled between her legs, propped up on his elbows as he bent to mouth at her, pressing kisses across her ribs and nosing at her breasts and dragging his wet mouth across them.

"Nip her a little, she loves that." Kylo prompted as he stretched out next to them, close enough for her to touch if she wanted to, still lightly stroking himself. He could stay that way for a while, she knew, which just lent itself to possibilities. But first, Ben.

Smoothing her hands over Ben's back, she arched into him as he followed Kylo's advise, gently biting at her before taking as much of her breast into his mouth as he could, his tongue lashing at her nipple. His hand drifted up to play with the other breast before he switched targets, releasing the first with a pop. For someone who was doing this for the first time, Ben sure as hell knew what he was about, she thought idly as she undulated against him.

Tugging on his shoulders she pulled him up so she could kiss him properly, rubbing her damp core up against his hot, hard cock while she did. When he reflexively bucked against her, she smiled and tugged his lip between her teeth. Now that she had him where she wanted him, Rey wasn't about to let go. Reaching down between them she took a hold of him, smoothing along his unknown and yet familiar length, swallowing his groan as she did. Then, guiding his tip to where she knew they both wanted him, she pressed up against him, letting him catch at her entrance.

"Wa-wait… condom!" He gasped, trying to draw back. Tightening her hold, Rey pulled him closer, shaking her head.

"No need, I'm clean, on the pill. You're clean, aren't you?"

"God, yes!"

"Then, what are you waiting for, Ben? Fuck me…"

Ben thrust his hips, sliding into her wetness with just a little more difficulty than Kylo. Rocking to ease the motion, she released his mouth so she could gasp for breath - he was filling her, splitting her open and she wanted more. Once, twice and then suddenly he was sliding all the way in, moaning as he did.

For a moment they paused, panting as they adjusted to each other and then he was moving, his thrusts not as practiced or controlled as Kylo's not no less effective as he rutted into her. She could feel his completion nearing, his body trembling as she clung to it, legs slung around his hips. Then, with a tortured groan he came, arching against her as he did, warmth flooding in her as he painted her insides.

Ben's head dropped to her shoulder, as he struggled to stay propped up and not collapse on her. As he came down from his high, she stroked his arms and shoulders, peppering him with soft kisses. Raising his head Ben looked at her, his expression stricken while his breath still sawed out of his heaving lungs.

"God, Rey… I'm sorry, I couldn't… I don't even know if you finished!"

"Shh… it's ok, Benny… we have all the time we want." She couldn't help smoothing her fingers down his face, watching as he instinctively turned to nuzzle at her hand.

Then Kylo was there, wrapping his arm around her as he pressed a kiss to her neck. His hand skimmed down her body to where she and Ben were still joined, his fingers momentarily circling Ben before pressing against her, stroking back up to her clit. The electric jolt made Ben's length slip from her, releasing the cum dammed up in her. As Ben eased out and rolled off of her, Kylo scooped up his brother's spend, running his fingers through her before slipping them lower, lower and circling her other tightly furled opening. With a moan, Rey let her head drop back against Kylo, shifting till he was pressed up tightly against her back, his lips still assaulting her neck - he knew what made her weak for him.

Pausing his rimming only to haul her leg back and up over his hip, Kylo resumed his fingering. Rey's attention narrowed to the feel of his middle finger alternately circling and pushing against her, the cum dripping from her flowing pussy helping to lubricate as he did. Then, slowly he pushed into her, letting her accommodate his finger's width.

"Will you open for me, baby, will you take one more?" His whisper was harsh in her ear, but his kisses were soft. Frantically, Rey nodded. She was already wound up from Ben, and needed to be able to finish. A thrill of anticipation went through her as she sensed what Kylo was preparing her for. She'd just never thought they would actually get here.

Working her slowly, Kylo inserted another finger into her. By now, Ben was recovered enough to reach out to help, rubbing his fingers into her pussy and smearing his cum to help Kylo fit in her ass. Turning away for a moment, he came back with the bottle of lube and squeezed some over Kylo's fingers. Rey groaned at the sensation, the intrusion now more smooth, more filling as Kylo's ministrations were eased. As she lay, splayed obscenely over him, Ben leaned forward to lick a stripe between her breasts, watching her reaction as he did.

Her eyes half dazed, she reached a grasping hand out, calling him to her. Quickly, Ben obliged, shifting on to his side to sandwich her between their bodies as he slipped a knee between her and Kylo's open legs, kissing her wherever he could reach, nipping and sucking across her sensitive body.

She had no idea for how long, between them, the brothers worked her up, up, tuning her like a musical instrument until she snapped, jerking against them as she came with a gutteral groan. As she floated in a daze, she thought she heard Kylo whisper, "Now Ben, take her."

And then he was, hard and ready, his cock pushing back into her pussy as he held her hips steady. As Ben slotted into her, easier this time than the first, she welcomed him into her body, wrapping an arm to hold on to him, as much for her sake as his. He moved in her with shallow movements as she revelled in the feel of him. As Ben settled deeper in her, she protested as she felt Kylo slide his fingers out of her.

"I'm not going anywhere, baby, I'm right here." She felt the bed shift as he climbed off and then heard the crinkle of foil as he pulled out a condom. Smiling she closed her eyes and let her body arch up against Ben - she knew what was coming.  

In no time Kylo was back, gathering them both against himself as he pressed his lubed and sheathed cock against her ass. As Ben stilled, Rey widened her stance, hooking her leg higher around Ben, clinging to him as her attention narrowed to where Kylo was gently pressing against her, working his cock in where his fingers had been. By the time he torturously, slowly slid his way in, Rey was reeling from the onslaught of pleasure-pain sparking through her. She had never been so full in her life, stuffed back and front with the brothers' not inconsiderable lengths. Panting she tossed her head back onto Kylo's shoulder, feeling how tightly he held himself. By now he would be reaching his breaking point, she knew, having denied himself all the while.

"Kylo, fuck me baby, now, please..." In response to her, he bit on her neck, sucking hard enough to leave a mark as his hips trembled against hers. And then he was moving, easing out before she sucked him back in, building up a rhythm. Soon, Ben joined him, alternating his withdrawal and thrusts with Kylo's so they were pistoning in and out of her like clockwork.

"God, Ben, I can fucking feel  you in her, fucking her. Do you like this, brother, did you imagine this?" Kylo gritted out as gripped Ben's hip for stability as he pounded into her.

Ben's only response was a moan before he reached out to grab Kylo and messily kiss him over Rey's shoulder.

As the pleasure built up again, winding her even tighter than she had been before, Rey knew she wouldn't last long, not being fucked between them the way she was.

"I'm close, I'm close baby…" she babbled, "Come in me... please, Ky, Ben… need you… please."

In response their movements grew fiercer, more erratic and spinning her higher and higher till they flung her over the edge, their bellows of completion mingling with her own cry as they followed her, their bodies spasming around each other.

Rey's senses whited out, sensory overload crashing through her body as she collapsed between them, breathing harshly.

How long they lay there, unable to move as the world whirled around them, she didn't know. Then she was being cradled and settled back against the pillows, a warm, wet cloth was wiping at her, gentle against her as she was cleaned - Rey had no idea who it was, taking care of her, she had no energy to look, letting the darkness take her instead.

When next she opened her eyes, the twins were tucked close to her, one on either side, their arms crossed over to hold her as they slept. As she shifted, they tightened their hold on her and nuzzled closer.

Smiling tiredly, Rey let herself slip back into sleep - they were going to be okay. All of them.

 

***