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Provided reasons to live

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"Now I ain't saying she a gold digger"
New school. Same me. Same person blasting Kanye in a cheap Toyota while rapping along to every word. If someone's car was right next to mine, they'd get a good view of me making a fool of myself. But honestly, I don't really care.

I'm what they call an ambivert. Some days I feel like I can talk to anybody. Like I can crack a joke in my friend group and everybody would laugh. Other days I keep my head low and put my music on full blast. My mom says that it’s really bad for my ears. “You're going to be deaf before your thirty” is her favorite quote. To be honest I don’t believe that. As long as I take a break from listening to it once a while I would be fine.

At my old school, I was known as the person who always had their headphones in there ear. I had a friend group but I really just zoned out and ignored everyone. Sometimes I would put my earphones in without music just so people wouldn't talk to me. But that would be rare. usually, I always was listening to something.

We just moved here over the summer because our other neighborhood was terrible. Violence was all around and my mom didn't want us to always be around that. The last straw was when my brother died when he got in the middle of a drive-by. My family has never been the same since. My brother is the one who introduced me to most of the people I listen to now. But the people he really hooked me onto is Kanye and The Weeknd

I have their albums over my wall. Along with Brockhampton, Twenty one Pilots, and Xxxtentacion. My music is all over the place. It can go from alternative rock to underground rap. I will literally listen to everything besides country. I probably have the biggest music collection my age. But the one person I idolize is Kanye.

I pull up in the parking lot of the high school. Shit, this looks so different than my old school. As I'm walking up I spot these guys near the dumpsters. They look like football players. I look closer and I see this really pale kid with a nice jacket on. He looks really scared. Then all of a sudden they pick him up, probably attempting to throw him in the dumpsters. Before I can process what’s happening I drop my stuff and start running over there. I couldn’t get there in time and the kid is covered in trash.

As I reach the dumpster I look at the first guy near me. He had a mohawk and this predatory smirk. “Get him out of there,” I say in a calmly matter. He looks at me and just smirks. “What if I don’t,” he says in a smug voice. “Then I’ll make you” I respond. I'm not scared of them. “How about this, you step away and leave us alone and maybe we’ll make out later”. I look at him with disgust. “First of all, I don’t play for your team so that’s not happening”. I look him up and down with my own smug look. “Second of all even if I did you would be the last person on earth that I would kiss”. I hear a chuckle from the dumpster and realize I forgot what i came over here for.


Another one of the douchebags starts talking. “You hear that puck, she’s a homosexual”. The guy with the mohawk looks at me with a conflicted face. “But she’s a girl, I can’t. He tells the other guy. “Fuck that, let's give this Homo a warm welcome to McKinley high”. Before I know it, im being lifted up and thrown in the dumpster. Thankfully I landed on my back. So much for surviving high school.

I try to sit up and climb out but I fail and trip over a can or something. I fall and I feel something weirdly shaped under my back. A faint ow rings out and I realize again I'm not alone in this dumpster.

“Oh my god, I'm so sorry” Jesus, my memory sucks today. I start ranting on how I was only trying to help. He lets out a faint chuckle and sticks out his hand. “Kurt Hummel.” “Unappreciated and the only out gay kid at this school,” he says in kind of a high pitch voice. I shake his hand. “Star Hamilton. “Really hungry and drenched in dirt.” he lets out another laugh. “You're really funny, if never really heard someone with a sense of humor without insulting everybody.” I let out a dry chuckle. “Well, I kind of just insulted that other guy”. “That doesn't count,” he says back. “That was well deserved.”
We get out the dumpster without me tripping and falling on him.

when we finallly touch the cocrete again, i take the time to analyze him. he has a all black coat with fur on his collar, shades that managed to stay on his face somehow, and black dress shoes. "Special occasion?" I ask."honey, you should always dress like your spending you last day on earth at a fashion show.

“Your new right?” he asks as were walking inside of the building. “Yeah just transferred here,” I say back. “Well, they always say a new school can be the best thing ever or your worst nightmare”. Like five seconds after he said that a football player with two slushies in his hand chucks it at us. “Welcome to McKinley LOSERS”. He walks off and high fives another football player.

Yep. this year is going to be fun.