Jester/Jack Harkness: Way back in days of olde
There was a legend told
About a hero known as James Galavant
Peasant Woman #1: Curved jaw and perfect hair...
Peasant Man #1: Cojones out to there...
Peasants: There was no hero quite like Galavant
Blacksmith: Tough, plus every other manly value...
Children: Mess with him, he'll disembowel you.
Peasant Woman #2: Yay!
He ruled in every way!
Peasant Man #2: A fairy tale cliché!
Peasants: And people called him Gaaaaaaa-laaaaaaa-vaaaaaaaaaaaant!
Jack: The man we're speaking of
He had a lady love
And dear Lucia, she was one fair maiden
Long legs and perfect skin
A body built for sin
With cleavage you could hold a whole parade in!
Ah, true love was never this ecstatic
Nor as wildly acrobatic!
Yes! He loved her to excess
Thrice daily more or less
And she'd be screaming...
Jack: One tiny problem
Soon would arise
Harold, a nearby king
Of wealth and stature
He watched Lucia
Lust in his eyes
And he asked her for her hand...
Well, more like a demand...
Well, more like had his henchman snatch her
Lucia: Galavant, help!
Jack and Company: Which brings us to today
The Royal Wedding Day
No one can stop it now but Galavant
Poor Lucia waits
Behind King Harold's gates
For the arrival of her Galavant
Now, at last begins a true adventure
Epic! Wild! A real butt-clencher!
So, Huzzah and tally-ho!
Sit back and here we go!
Attend the tale of...
Lucia and company: Gaaaaaaaaaaa-laaaaaaaaaaa-vaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant!