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Bittersweet Ignorance

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Chapter 1: Fuck the Buddha Box!
Tweek’s point of view
I’m in my room, bawling my eyes out while stuffing my face in mocha and caramel ice creams. Ever since Cartman is supposedly diagnosed with “anxiety,” he comes up with his invention called “Buddha Box.” A Buddha Box! I can’t believe he has the balls to admit he has anxiety and encourage everybody to get a Buddha box! I have anxiety in my life. Sure, I can’t handle the amount of pressure on my shoulders and worry too much leading to a series of panic attacks! But I learn to cope with my anxiety with or without coffee, the things I do to calm me down, and my boyfriend, Craig! Ex-boyfriend to put it this way because I broke up with him after the therapy session! Cartman is just using it as an excuse to be on his phone and can’t get his shits together; he decides to be a complete fucking asshole to everybody. It fucking pisses me off! Because of him, everybody seems to fall for this piece of crap to “relieve anxiety.” Especially my parents and ex-boyfriend. What am I supposed to do now without him?! Why do I even associate with that fat weasel?! It’s always about Cartman, Cartman, Cartman! That’s it! I can’t be in my room, moping around! I have a lot of things to do on my hands by myself!
No one’s point of view
Tweek did everything he can to spend times for himself without anyone else. Especially his old flame. He invests himself in singing and playing the piano after school. He works out at the gym in the early mornings. He makes baked goods for Token, Kenny, Kyle, Butters, Stan, David, and Jimmy; his baking skills come to hands in school fundraiser with Jimmy, Wendy, David, and Heidi. Speaking of Heidi, Heidi is the one-person Tweek comes to for comfort. Luckily, Heidi is back to her old sweet self after she broke things off with Cartman. Heck, she’s one of the people who didn’t fall for the Buddha box because of him.
Tweek’s point of view
It feels so good to do things for myself without any worries. Baking, singing, playing the piano, and working out makes me forget what I’m infuriated at. I mean I feel better mentally and physically from the exercises. I guess I don’t need coffee to calm myself down. Okay fine, I sometimes drink coffee in a brief period of time. I find music as ways to immerse myself in a place outside of school, work, and relationship. Best of all, I even get to try out new recipes and help my friends out on school events. Especially Heidi who I now become friends with. Ha! Beat that, Buddha boxes! She saw me singing and playing the piano after school.
“I hear you’re the one singing in the music room,” Heidi pointed out, smiling at me, “You have an amazing voice. What the song’s called?”
“‘Thank You, Next’ by Ariana Grande,” I answered. Ariana Grande’s “Thank You, Next” is one of the new songs on the radio I find enjoyable to listen. Being hooked by the melody, I hum this tune on the piano. The song hypnotizes me to practice it constantly to miss recess and lunch through after school until my shift to the coffee shop.
“Hey, I like that song,” commented Heidi.
I thanked her for her compliment. I can tell that Heidi is getting better after she ended her relationship with Cartman. Good for her! Me and Heidi start hanging out at her house, discussing what we’re doing with school, our interests, friends, and dreams. Until then we get to our love lives, I began to shut down. The mention of love winces me back rock bottom. My heart cracks a little at the one thing I am lost without Craig.
“Tweek? Hey, you seem to be despondent. Are you okay?” concerned Heidi where I find myself looking down at the ground. I can sense the dire force of sobbing to conceal my face with my hands.
“What’s wrong, Tweekie? Don’t cry.”
“I just feel that Craig has changed so much lately! He barely even talks to me anymore!” I let my distress out to her, “It’s all Cartman’s fault! I hate him for his Buddha Box bullshits! Because of Cartman, I can’t deal with everybody! Mainly Jackass Craig! I’m fucking done with everything! Fuck Cartman! Fuck Craig! Fuck everybody else! And fuck everything!”
“Don’t be upset, Tweekie Bird,” Heidi reassured me while holding me, “Remember what happened with me and Eric?”
I nodded at her as I listen to her confession, “When I broke up with him, I learn to never blame myself thanks to someone else’s mistakes. Especially someone else’s mistakes cost me to lose the people around me and this person who cared about me all this time. So, I decide to redeem myself such as redoing the Special Ed Science Fair, committing to help others, improving my grades, and exercising with my friends and family. I also devote myself to gardening and makeups to become a Youtuber. Despite mistrust among the people I caused them misery, there are some people forgive me.”
“Though I am gratified by what you did and learn from Cartman, I still have doubts in my head,” I trembled, quivering my lips, “I am unsure if I can go on coping without Craig.” My heart screams out ‘Yes!’ for Craig. On the other hand, my mind objects to come back in Craig’s arms! She rubs my back in small circles, using her fingers to wiping my tears away.
“Thanks, Tweek! You know Tweek, you are so much better than Cartman and Craig combined. Forget about them! Hell, Fuck the Buddha Box!” I look up at her, “I’m going to give you some advice. I hate to see my friend in tears and a broken heart over a guy ditching you for a box.”
“Yeah, Fuck the Buddha Box!” I raised my voice to repeat the phrase into a chant, “Fuck the Buddha Box! Fuck the Buddha Box! Fuck the Buddha Box!”
“You go, Tweekie Bird! Don’t lose the battle and war to them!” Heidi encouraged me. My eyes water up in tears. This time, they are tears of joy. Thank you, Heidi.
“Right now, I’m going to clean your face up because tears, red eyes, puffy cheeks, and quivering lips ruin your pretty face,” Heidi takes me to her bathroom, washing my face with a damp towel, “Time to call for some help.”

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: Heidi's Rules

Tweek’s point of view
Rule number one: Don’t pick up the phone!
“Pick up the phone and you will never get over them, you can taste defeat!” ~ Heidi Turner
I love the piano, not because of the tone or how it is easy to play than other instruments. I love the piano because the piano is the only thing I can get my shits together from these stressful situations. Before Craig and the whole yaoi thing.

Feeling used
But I’m still missing you and I can’t
See the end of this
Just want to feel your kiss
Against my lips and now
All this time is passing by
But I still can’t seem to tell you
It hurts me every time I see you
Realized how much I need you

The song, I Hate You I Love You, embodies my heartbreak. It is true how love is. Love used to be sweet at first. So sickeningly sweet! Love is a piece of shit people believe in from fucking fairytales! 

I hate you, I love you
I hate that I love you
Don’t want to, but I can’t put
Nobody else above you
I hate you, I love you
I hate that I want you
You want it, you need it
And I'll never be it

I hear my phone ringing on the piano as I pause for a second. I grab my phone to see who is calling me. The screen on my phone says ‘Craig.’ I wrinkle my face at his name. Ugh! Un-fucking-believable! What he wants from me this time!? He has his *retch* it, so why fucking bother me?! Should I answer or not?
I recall what Heidi says to me and the phrase I said earlier. My index finger immediately taps on to the red decline icon. My phone is silence. I aim my phone to a chair but rather lands on the floor. Scoff! Should I care about my phone being shattered on the floor?! Shattered like my heart! I continue to harmonize the melody on the piano. I channel my anger at them and the bullshits into the rhythm to sing out the lyric. The lyric pushes me on the edge of battling my emotions! I don’t fucking care if I get the impression of my face heating up and tears are dripping from my green-hazel eyes!

I miss you when I can’t sleep
Or right after coffee or right after when I can’t eat
I miss in my front seat
Still got sand in my sweaters from nights we don’t remember
Do you miss me like I miss you
Fucked around and got attached to you
Friends can break your heart too
And I am always tired but never of you
If I treated you like you wouldn’t like that
Held out my hand for you
But you didn’t touch that
I wrote a text but then
I deleted that
I got these feelings but
You didn’t realize that
Oh, oh keep it on the low
You’re still in love with me but your friends don’t know
If you wanted me you would just say so
And if I were you,
I would never let you go

On the flip side, he lets me go in the blink of an eye. Wow… I would be so dumbfounded if he regrets choosing it over me. Big surprise! Boo-hoo cry me a river! Who am I to him?! Second place?! Third wheel?! Hmph!

~Flashback (at Heidi’s house) ~
“You know Tweek, you are so much better than Cartman and Craig combined. Forget about them! Hell, Fuck the Buddha Box!”
“Yeah, Fuck the Buddha Box!"
“You go, Tweekie Bird! Don’t lose the battle and war to them!”
~Flashback ends (back to the school’s music room) ~

I hate you, I love you
I hate that I love you
Don’t want to, but I can’t put
Nobody else above you
I hate you, I love you
I hate that I want you
You want it, you need it
And I'll never be it

The music distracts me from having to pick up my phone. Heidi is right. I can do better than Cartman and Craig. She is the reason to hold my head high and stand on my own two feet. I don’t fucking care about them anymore! Buddha box or not, I’m going to prove myself that I come out stronger than them. Fuck them, fuck the Buddha Box, and fuck this bullshit! 

All alone I watch you watch it
Like it’s the only thing you’ve ever seen
You never cared, you never did
You don’t give a damn about me
Yeah, all alone I watch you watch
Like it’s the only thing you’ve ever seen
How is it you never notice that
You are slowly killing me
I hate you, I love you
I hate that I love you
Don’t want to, I can’t put
Nobody else above you
I hate you, I love you
I hate that I want you
You want it, you need it
And I’ll never be it

Rule number two: Revenge makeovers
“Spite them with a brand-new face and style!” ~ Heidi Turner
“I talked to Nichole and Bebe about fashion tips for you,” Heidi mentors me, “I told them about your broken heart from Craig and Bebe, Nichole, and I come up with a style together for you.”
“What is it?” I follow alongside Heidi as we are strolling around the mall. Heidi tells me that Bebe and Nichole are experts at fashion out of her friends in her group. They are so cool enough to become fashion icons. This is something that I didn’t know because the guys mock the girls, joking about them. Of course, Cartman! Geez, it’s all about him! I have to listen to his rants every fucking day to give me a headache! Thank god, I come to Heidi. Unlike him, Heidi never complains about anything; is good at giving advice and listening.
“Well, you’re nice, cute, and you have a face of an angel,” her comment makes me blush. Nobody calls me cute or anything. Not even my ex. I remembered being number #8 on the girls’ secret list. Nevertheless, I forgot what happened to it.
“Then again, I want to see the inner badassery out of you!” Heidi smirks at me. She knows what she’s talking about. Hmm...Cute and badass..., “So badass and stylish that they’ll regret it for sure! In fact, payback is a bitch to them. Bebe and Nichole know where to shop for clothes of this specific style!”
We go stores to stores, shopping for new clothes and shoes money can buy. At first, I feel out of my element about the outfits we’re choosing. Heidi notices me being self-conscious and puts her hand on my shoulder, “Hey, don’t think about what they say and think. This is the 21st century, so who gives a damn about wearing feminine or masculine. Clothes are just clothes.”
I get to model the outfits, strutting down the fitting room and did flirty poses and smizes. Heidi takes pictures on her phone while applauding me, “Yes, Tweek! Flaunt your curves because honey, people and the Buddha boxes are not ready for this cute booty of yours! You’re like a supermodel on the runway!"
The clothes and shoes we brought are mixtures of dark and soft colors. They have textures I’m not familiar with including leather, lace, velvet, and other materials. The guys and dads ridicule girls’ and moms’ clothes and I look back to the metrosexual fad in 3rd grade; I feel regretful to beat up Kyle because he just wants to be true to himself. I wonder what and how Kyle is doing after the Heidi’s and Cartman’s splitsville.
Of course, until PC principal comes to the picture. Speaking of outfits, I am wearing the ones Heidi pick out for me right now! Believe me, they highlight my “curves” nicely and are comfortable. I swear I feel like Cinderella to her glass slipper when wearing high heels and boots! I love these shoes! Minus her prince charming. Sorry, not sorry to the prince charming!
“There’s more,” I follow her to a salon where we are treated to massages, spa treatments, and mani-pedi. I got to admit I never had any relaxation like this before. I never had the times to take care of myself. I always work at my parents’ coffee shop after school; spend times with him. My shoulders and back aches from my times with work and relationship.
“Wow, your face looks fresh and gorgeous,” praised Heidi as we pay for the massages and spa treatments.
“Come on, I’ll show you my favorite store,” She takes me to a cosmetic store. She brought me a makeup box, wipes, remover, and facial treatment products, and a shitload of makeups. I feel bad for her to pay the kinds of stuff for me even though I can pay them myself, but she insisted. She tells me how the box can fit so many eyeshadow palettes, lipsticks, lip liners, blushes, eyeliners, false eyelashes, and mascara. It also comes with makeup brushes, makeup sponge, facial lotion, concealer, and other things in this box. Holy shit! This box can hold a lot of stuff and costs more than what Token have at his house!
When we got home, Heidi teaches me how to do makeup. I used to have the same awkwardness on makeup as I did with the new clothes. The guys and dads badmouthed makeups as a waste of time and other shits. Until before PC principal comes to our town. However, Heidi’s words encourage me to screw them and their judgments. It turns out makeup is like art on my face. I somehow find respect in makeups after all.
“Treat yourself like a princess with some facial masks, cleansers, and moisturizers,” Heidi offered the facial bottles and jars plus makeup kits to me as gifts which I thanked her deeply.
Rule number three: You, Yourself, and Only You
“The only person worth your time is you and not them!” ~ Heidi Turner
I’m already finished practicing Ariana Grande’s song, “Thank You, Next.” It’s just that I need to work on rewriting the lyrics. Instead of Sean, Ricky, Pete, and Malcolm, I put the names of my crushes and sure, Craig. I remembered my celebrity crushes like Chris Hemsworth from Thor in Marvel, Keegan Allen from Pretty Little Liars, and Jamie Dornan from Fifty Shades of Grey movies. I did binge-watch these ‘provocative’ movies and a tv show for ‘chicks’ according to certain somebodies in my laptop when I broke up with Craig, so don’t judge me! I also replace ‘Ari’ with ‘Tweekie’ after the nickname Heidi gave me. The last change is ‘my mama’ with Heidi and ‘my dad’ with Cartman. It makes senses considering Heidi outgrown Cartman. Completed! I open my mouth to sing my rewritten version of Ariana Grande’s Thank You, Next.

Thought I end up with Chris
But he wasn’t a match
Wrote some songs about Keegan
Now I listen and laugh
Even though I almost got married
And for Jaime, I’m so thankful
Wish I could say, “thank you” to Craig
Cause he’s an angel
One taught me love
One taught me patience
And one taught me pain
Now I’m so amazing

I rolled my eyes at the words ‘angel’ and ‘pain.’ True, he taught me pain with the Buddha box! I shrug it off to not think about it. Ironically, he is only an angel to me and our baby, Stripes! Before the Buddha box!

I’ve loved and I’ve lost
But that’s not what I see
So, look what I got
Look what you taught me
And for that, I say
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next
I’m so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I’m so fucking
Spend more time with my friends
I ain’t worry about nothing
Plus, I met someone else
We have a better discussion
I know they say I move on too fast
But this one gonna last
Cause his name is Tweekie
And I’m so good with that
He taught me love
He taught me patience
He handles pain
He’s so amazing

That’s right, Tweek! The only person who is worth my time is me. I love me more than anyone else. Anyone else who broke my heart doesn’t deserve me. Including you, Craig! Boys are such players and fuck machines! 

I’ve loved and I’ve lost
But that’s not what I see
'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)
Ain't no need for searching
And for that, I'll say
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next
I’m so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Say thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I’m so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
One day I will walk down the aisle
Holding hands with Heidi
I’ll be thanking to Cartman
Cause she grew from the drama
Only wanna do it once, real bad
Go on make that shit lasts
God forbid something happens
At least this song is a smash
I got so much love
Got so much patience
I’ve learned from the pain

If it wasn’t for Craig, then I wouldn’t learn the hard way of how a love story ends with heartbreak. 

I turned out amazing
I’ve loved and I’ve lost
But that’s not what I see
'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)
Ain't no need for searching
And for that, I'll say
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next
I’m so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Say thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I’m so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Yeah, yee
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next

I croon along to the end of the song. Wow! I want to sing this song again! I am getting the feeling that it will get stuck in my head! Ariana Grande is the best at handling with her breakups! While I’m smiling, tears flooded down my face down to my dress and the keys. He is why I cried thousands of tears every day and night. The pain from him is why I’m still here. Breathing and fine on my own. Thank you, Craig! 

Rule number four: Eyes on the prizes!
“Are you ready for your time to shine? Show them what you got!” ~ Heidi Turner
“Hey Tweek, you should try out for the talent show and cheerleading,” Heidi and I did our yoga session in the gym. I join her along since she narrated me about her daily visit to the gym with her friends and sometimes her family.
“You really think so?” I questioned, “When are the talent show and cheerleading tryouts?”
“Absolutely Tweek! The talent show is on Wednesday during lunch or after school and cheerleading tryouts are on next Friday!” she informs me, “You have musical talent in piano and singing and you’re flexible like a pretzel! Also, we need a boy in the cheerleading squad!”
A talent show!? Cheerleading!? This is too much pressure! There are going to be so many people watching me! What if I’m not good enough to be in the talent show and the cheerleading squad!? I’ll let everybody including Heidi down!
“Hey, I will always be there for you no matter what. Put your heart into the talent show and cheerleading,” Heidi convinces me considerately as I thank her, “Show them what you’re made of!”
~The next day~
“On Wednesday, We Wear Pink!”
I stride confidently in the school’s corridor to find the sign-up sheet for the talent show and cheerleading. The sign-up sheets are posted on the school’s board. Luckily, the talent show is blank. The cheerleading sheet consists of only a few of the girls’ names. Blissfully and anxiously, I shakingly write down my names on both papers. Damn! Even without coffee, my handwriting is anything but all over the place! Who cares?! I am ready to demolish Cartman, Craig, and the rest of the fucking Buddha boxes! They are going down and they haven’t seen the last of me!
“Let’s do this!” I accepted my challenges at the sign-up papers, “Bring it on, Cartman, Craig, and Buddha boxes!”

Chapter Text

 

Chapter 3: Bye Old Tweek, Hello New Tweek

Tweek's point of view

"Tweekie, you look so exquisite!" Heidi has her phone out to snap a selfie with me. "You'll have some heads turning when you show up in this outfit of yours!"

"Thanks, Heidi!" I said, "Hey, I should give you, Bebe, and Nichole credits for the makeover."

"No problem honey," Heidi taps on her phone, "I already send a photo on Instagram and tag you, Theresa, Isla, and the rest of the girls. By the way, are you ready for the auditions?"

"Let's hope, Heidi because I have been going through the lyrics for hours!"

"Don't overexert yourself. I'm going to be there for you, watching you do your best," She smiles at me, "I'll practice the cheer moves with you at the gym."

No one's point of view (cue the music! ~ Black Magic by Little Mix)

Heidi is right. Ever since Tweek's breakup with Craig and his makeover from Heidi (plus Bebe and Nichole), he got reactions from boys and girls in the school. Some are shocked and confused, including Stan, Kyle, Token, David, and Jimmy. Butters beams at him kindly, while Kenny, of course, has a lustful look on his face (As the narrator, I would've whacked him in the head for being a perv).

"Holy shit!" Kyle is amazed at the unexpected beauty from Tweek, then he disgustedly looks away from the presence of Heidi leading Tweek. He even lets out a scoff at her. Tweek notices his behavior towards her; he tries to put his finger on it.

"What the hell?!" exclaimed Stan. He can't believe that 1) Tweek isn't with Craig as usual (before the Buddha Box incident by *ahem* Cartman, so no shit, Sherlock!), 2) He's turned into one of the popular girls in drama movies, and 3) Tweek turns out fine without Craig on his side.

"Oh lord, Tweek..." Token blurted out as he sees his friend, dressed in pinks, white, and golds and makeups painted on his face, walking with Heidi.

"D-Damn Tweek, damn!" stuttered Jimmy.

"Aye yai yai, Tweek!" David's jaws dropped.

Bebe and Nichole are squealing at the blonde-haired boy's metamorphosis thanks to them and Heidi, clapping for him and Heidi. Wendy gives them an approving look on her face as well as the other girls. Except for the raisin girls who are sneering at them which Tweek and Heidi don't give a flying fuck.

~Time skips towards lunch! (no time to do the recess part!) ~

Tweek's point of view

"Tweek Tweak, you're up next," PC principal announced on his microphone. Taking a deep breath and reminding myself to calm down, I come out on stage. I can see PC principal, Strong Woman, Mr. Mackey, and a brown-haired man with a thin mustache. He is wearing a pink-collar shirt, grey pant, and black shoes. I can also see Heidi seating in the middle row, giving me a thumbs-up.

"Tweek, what song are you going to sing for us?"

"Umm... This song is called Thank You, Next by Ariana Grande," I answered in the microphone, "And it is my favorite song dedicated to Heidi and the ones that got away."

"Oh, glorious choice!" the man in the pink shirt chimed in a flamboyant voice, "Show us what you got!" That guy is an extra!

The music is starting and I envision myself in the music room after school, going through the pain from them and the love and patience because of Heidi. At the count of three, I open my mouth to sing in the microphone.

Thought I end up with Chris
But he wasn't a match
Wrote some songs about Keegan
Now I listen and laugh

I snap my fingers and sway my hips to the beat. I can see Heidi's friends coming to sit down with her. It is so awkward of me to dance in front of people especially the judges, Heidi, and the girls. No, Tweek! Just go with the flow!

Even though I almost got married

And for Jaime, I'm so thankful
Wish I could say, "thank you" to Craig
Cause he's an angel
One taught me love
One taught me patience
And one taught me pain
Now I'm so amazing

I smile as I chant 'One taught me love, one me taught patience, and one me taught pain, now I'm so amazing' out. I think about the people who made me become who I am. Especially Craig. He may break my heart to wonder if I love him or not. But I'm going to be okay from now on.

I've loved and I've lost
But that's not what I see
So, look what I got
Look what you taught me
And for that, I say

Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next

I swing my hand up and down and making circles clockwise and counter-clockwise left and right.

No one's point of view

Unbeknownst to Tweek, a fan is turned on to a high mode from outside the theatre. The wind from the fan gives him movements as he's dancing along the music. The blonde boy looks breathtaking when his hair is flying in different directions. The spotlights suddenly shine above Tweek. They shimmer the pinks, golds, and white to make him look surreal.

I'm so fucking grateful for my ex

Tweek's point of view

I slightly dip down not far from the ground and up. I pat down the bottom of my dress when I feel a gust of air blowing across my legs. Where the gust of air comes from? My feet are doing their dance show as they are kicking and tapping on the floor.

Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I'm so fucking
Spend more time with my friends
I ain't worry about nothing
Plus, I met someone else
We have a better discussion
I know they say I move on too fast
But this one gonna last
Cause his name is Tweekie
And I'm so good with that
He taught me love

Bouncingly, I put both hands on my chest and hips. Holding on the microphone, I pop my shoulders playfully. Not too little, not too much.

He taught me patience
He handles pain
He's so amazing

I've loved and I've lost
But that's not what I see
'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)
Ain't no need for searching
And for that, I'll say
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next

I throw my left arm in the air, flicking my hand up and down. I rotate my arm around clockwise down and again with my right arm. Once more, I throw both arms and wave them side to side.

I'm so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Say thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I'm so fucking grateful for my ex

With my arms still up in the air, I circle them while turning around as well. I stop with a kick in the back from my left leg, placing my hands on my hips. Nodding my head, I drop low to do the squat pose girls do on Instagram. I don't care if the wind randomly is whisking my dress up.

Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
One day I will walk down the aisle
Holding hands with Heidi
I'll be thanking Cartman
Cause she grew from the drama

Oh god! This is the part where I feel overwhelmed. A mix of pain and bliss are tickling me to let my tears out like a Niagara Fall. No, Tweek! Stay strong!

Only wanna do it once, real bad
Go on make that shit lasts
God forbid something happens
At least this song is a smash
I got so much love
Got so much patience
I've learned from the pain

I turned out amazing
I've loved and I've lost
But that's not what I see
'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)
Ain't no need for searching
And for that, I'll say

I give myself a twirl. I did my own small can-can dance while my hands are on the microphone.

Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next
I'm so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Say thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Next)
I'm so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Yeah, yee
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next

I blow out a kiss at the end of the song. Smiling and relaxing, PC Principal, Strong Woman, and Mr. Mackey are clapping as well as Heidi and the girls. The guy in the pink shirt is actually crying.

"Wow, Tweek. I never knew you have something in you. Great performance. Mkay."

"The song is romantic, cute, and sweet. There are so many expressions someone can relate to," said Strong Woman.

"Oh my god! It is so ethereal and heartwarming! I love it!" sniffled the guy in the pink shirt.

"Thank you for that lovely performance, Tweek." I can hear PC Principal mutters out, "So progressive of a boy to wear clothes and sing a song outside of the gender norms and he is proud."

As I get down from stage and PC Principal calls out the person's name to audition, Heidi and the girls come dashing towards me to congratulate me.

"You rock, Tweek!"

"You look like an angel!"
"Way to go, Tweekie!"

"I'm glad that you did it! I knew you nail it!" Heidi hugs me in a way I close my eyes to cry on her shoulder. Thank you, Heidi, for being there for me. Thank you, Craig, for making me believe I'm fine on my own without you! I love you, Craig and I'll never forget you for what you did to me through the heartbreak and glee.

"What's wrong Tweek?" noticed Wendy as she becomes concerned. The rest of the girls have the same expression as her.

"Craig is going to pay for what he did to Tweekie," Bebe puffs out furiously while Nichole looks at her in fear. Her sky-blue eyes are flaring and her fist smacks against her hand. She makes a bone cracking sound.

I shake my head at Bebe. I don't want Bebe beating the crap out of Craig. What if Bebe gets suspended or expelled from the school?! Even if it is Cartman's fault for my breakup with Craig, violence isn't going to solve anything. Heidi taught me to be better than Cartman, Craig, and the Buddha boxes. Because of her, I learn to love the person who is worth my time more than anyone else. Me. Tweek Tweak.

~ At my house~

Washing my face from bawling my eyes out, I look myself in the mirror. I stare at myself with a smile on my face. Try to make me self-destruct, huh? Guess what? I am still here, so try again! I don't care about Cartman, Craig, and the Buddha Box anymore. I'm getting over them!

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: Tweekie Got the Moves

No one's point of view

~ The next day ~

The boys and girls are gathering around at the bulletin board. They're here for the list PC principal and Strong Woman posted to see who is accepted to perform the talent show. Some scream out 'Yes!' and did their victory dances. Others, unfortunately, groan as they droop their heads low in disappointment.

Tweek, being the last one standing, approaches towards the list. He uses his index finger to guide through the names on the list. As he checks every name from top to bottom, he stops at the mid-bottom section. Tweek Tweak. He starts to giggle, showing his irresistible smile. He can't believe that he got accepted to perform the talent show!

Tweek's point of view

"I did it!" I cheered as I tell Heidi about the news, "It is all because of you, Heidi."

"That is outstanding, Tweek. I knew you can do it!" Heidi hugs me as she did when I sang Ariana Grande's "Thank You, Next" to the judges, her, and the girls, "Hey Tweek, how about you and me practice the cheer moves at the gym?"

"Yes," I nodded at her. Today is Friday and we need to let out some steam after hours of being in the classroom with work plus more homework piling up on us.

~ At the gym ~

"So, if you want to be in the cheerleader squad, you have to learn the cheer moves and dances," Heidi required me as we are setting up in the gym, "I know this is new to you, so I'm going to teach you baby steps by baby steps."

I nodded at her. Yep, this is new to me since I mainly play sports with the guys. Of course, I only did it since me and Craig becomes a couple. Because of my relationship with Craig, I didn't get to explore other things that didn't revolve around him. I never get to do anything besides being arm candy to him.

No one's point of view

Heidi and Tweek went through warmups, cheer moves, and the cheer chant. They even practice the moves with pom-poms and cheerleading equipment. Tweek is strong at flexibility according to Heidi because he did his daily workouts at the gym in the early morning. However, he struggles on the cheer chant considering how he isn't an extrovert. He usually screams and stumbles on words when he opens his mouth besides "Gah!", "Oh, Jesus!", and "Too much pressure!"

"We are Cows, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo moo! Go Cows!" Tweek chanted in a rather soft but almost loud tone, clapping to the rhythm.

"Louder, Tweek!" ushered Heidi.
"We are, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo mo! Gooo Cows!"

"Again, Tweek!"

"We are, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo mo! Gooo Cows!" Tweek vocalized, managing to bring confidence in himself, "We are Cows, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo moo! Gooo Cows! We are Cows, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo moo! Gooo Cows!" He finishes off with a jump.

"You got it, Tweek!" applauded Heidi as she jumps up and down cheerfully, "You got the flexibility! You got team spirit! Now it is time for the choreography! Let's see if you got the moves!"

"Hit the music!"

~Cue the music! (Song #1: "Ready for It?" by Taylor Swift) ~

"5, 6, 7, 8!" Heidi counted to the music as she begins the choreography and Tweek follows alongside her.

Next, they break it down to a dance battle which they end up having fun, laughing with each other.

~insert dance scene (Song #2: "Sorry Not Sorry" by Demi Lovato) ~

watch?v=a3kD1ry7SMA, Tweek as Veronica and Heidi as Cheryl

Lastly, they are going to take turns for their own dance moves. Tweek watches Heidi's dance as she moves gracefully and rigorously and did her gymnastics stunts.

~ Heidi's dance~ (Song #3: "New Rules" by Dua Lipa)

When the music stops to a finish, she strikes a pose. He is amazed by her performance to cheer for her.

"Your turn, Tweek," Heidi reminded him. He walks over to the center where Heidi did her dance. His heart is drumming in his chest as he keeps his composure. He thought to himself, 'Don't freak out, Tweek! Do it for yourself! Do it for Heidi!'

~ Tweek's dance~ (Song #4: "Shape of you" by Ed Sheeran)

The music starts off as poppy and upbeat with a tropical vibe, so Tweek dances in a playful, flirty way. He twirls, leaps, and did gymnastics moves.

Heidi's point of view

When I watch him dance, I never knew that Tweek has something in him. He has a sense of style. He sings like an angel at the talent show audition and music room. He even got the spirit and moves to be a cheerleader. Overall, he continues to grow as his own person without him. Most importantly, he is the only person who actually has sympathy for me after the things I had done. Sure, I have the girls as my friends; they instead made me feel bad about myself for my choice to date Eric let alone didn't bother to at least comfort me.

I still remember the tears falling from his eyes to his face as I give him a hug and wipe them away with my fingers. He reminds of me when I broke up with him. Hurt. Betrayed. Angry. Having no one to turn to. I never forget the looks on my classmates and the whispering from them. Of course, I did deserve to be shitted on or snubbed. Especially the person who did help me; now hates me.

~ Flashback (at school) ~

"Oh my god, it's that girl who ruined the Special Ed Science Fair."

"Didn't she used to be with Cartman?"

"She's such a bad girl for breaking a great guy's heart!"

"Hmph!" I winced at the way Kyle scowls and turn away from me. This is worse than the comment he said to me since the "President" incident.

~ Flashback (the "President" incident) ~

"I would never have the hots for the person you are now!" he hissed at me. I shouldn't call his brother stupid. Heck, I shouldn't insult him or his own people in front of everybody at school in the first place.

~ Flashback ends ~

"Hey Heidi, are you okay?" Tweek taps me on the shoulder as I snap myself to reality, "I'm already done with my dance. Do you want to go grab a bite to eat?"

"Sure, Tweek," I can hear the sound of my tummy growling, "And I know a place we can go."

No one's point of view

Heidi and Tweek go to their separate ways to take a shower and change to their usual outfits. They both exit out of the gym. They walk together to an Asian restaurant where they sit by the window. Heidi orders a Thai papaya salad with peanuts and mint and avocado smoothie while Tweek orders a Vietnamese fish and noodle salad with dills and an iced Vietnamese coffee.

"Wow, this place is very nice," Tweek complimented when observing around the place. The place looks rustic and contemporary with authentic Asian twists, "Thank you, Heidi, for taking me to this salad place."

"No problem, Tweek. This is the place I know that have fresh and healthy foods and authentic." They remember City Wok as the only 'Asian' restaurant in this town before PC Principal, Strong Woman, and the PC babies come to town, "I remember he tricks me into eating a bucket of fried chicken from KFC without knowing it is not vegan."

"It's all right, Heidi," Tweek comforts her, "Cartman is always like that with people. Manipulative, obnoxious, and condescending. But you turn out better without him and I am proud of what you did back then. I used to be in his gang until he kicked me out and I start to hang out with Craig, Clyde, Token, and Jimmy. Even Butters."

Heidi smiles at him as they're munching and sipping on their foods and drinks. Tweek sighs and said, "Heidi, I'm sorry that the guys used Butters to dress up as a girl in order to infiltrate and makes fun of you and the girls all these times."

"Hey, it's okay. I have no hard feelings," Heidi cheers Tweek up, "We all did something terrible in our lives such as how me and the girls shitted on Wendy for not being a 'stupid, spoiled whore' or called her 'jelly' or 'hater.'"

"Let's not forget about the Skankhunt thing." They both shuddered at the horrible mayhem caused by an adult when Heidi finds out who is Skankhunt44. They can't imagine the boys and girls breaking up and feuding with each other. Butters pulled down his pant to reveal his 'weiner' and Nelly shouting at Butters that 'she's going to kick his ass.' Tweek is relieved to know that he and Craig didn't break up at the time of the Skankhunt44 episode.

Passing the time at the restaurant, they start their usual conversations such as their classes, friends, and other topics in generals including the talent show, cheerleading, and dancing. Tweek never went out anywhere else due to how he always spends his times at his parent's coffee shop.

"Tweek, I got to admit that you have the potential in singing, dancing, and cheerleading. Why hide it away from everybody?" the question Heidi is asking shooks him to the core.

"Well... besides being busy at the coffee shop, I've been spending times with Craig that I never had times for myself or do anything else. I can't believe I did everything out of my infatuation for that boy." Tweek stare down at his plate cleaned of his food, "I feel like a damsel in distress, trophy housewife, or ragdoll to him."

"Don't say that. You're more than just Craig's boyfriend," affirmed Heidi, "What's important is you become strong and independent in no matter what. Don't make the same mistake as I did."

"You're right, Heidi," Tweek grins at Heidi.

~Time flies ~

In consideration of Heidi's encouraging pep talk with Tweek, he works hard to open himself up to the people he knows and on the moves for the cheerleading tryouts throughout the week. Heidi is crying out tears of joy to see her friend blossoming from a bud to a flower.

Friday is coming and today's the cheerleading tryout after school. Tweek look at the girls in his school stretching and practicing their moves. He even finds a bunch of girls from Raisins applying their makeups, doing their hairs, and looking themselves in their compact mirrors.

Tweek's point of view

These girls are real competitions. They look like they're trained their asses off. Should I feel intimidated at them? I mean I'm the only boy to sign up for cheerleading? For what reason besides to spite them?! The only exception is the Raisin girls. They are just skins and no substances whatsoever. I roll my eyes at them as if I doubt that they can make the cheer squad.

I immediately spot Heidi in the middle section as she waves at me. I wave her back and come to her direction.

"Hey Heidi," I greeted her as I hug her, "How are you?"

"Hey Tweekie Bird," Heidi greeted me as well, "I'm doing good. What about you?"

"I tutored Lisa Berger after school at the library for her homework, made Karen, Ike, Dougie, and Tricia lunch, and helped David run his family's restaurant," I tell her how Tricia, Karen, Ike, Dougie, and David are left to take care of themselves because of their parents busy in the Buddha box, "I also helped Butters and Scott Malkinson on their project."

"That's great of you to do anything else! I told you that you're more than just Craig's boyfriend."

"Yeah, I am proud of you, Tweek!" I turned to see Butters and Scott.

"Hey Butters and Scott, what are you doing here?"

"Oh, I am here to thank you for helping me and Scott on our project about the book, The Outsiders."

"Yeah, it is nice of you to help us on our project, Tweek," Scott interjected, "You're the only person who is nice to me besides Butters."

"You're welcome, Butters and Scott," I smile at them both admiringly and regrettably. Butters and Scott are the sweetest out of the guys. They didn't deserve being treated badly by everybody in school. I wish I could've apologized to Butters for the bad things I did to him; fail to defend him against Cartman.

"By the way, good luck on cheerleading tryouts!" He and Scott give me a thumb-up alongside Heidi.

No one's point of view

The whistle blares in the school gym to indicate the girls and Tweek to line up to audition for the spot in the cheer team. Every girl and Tweek are lined and called by last names. To Tweek's surprise, the Raisin girls have last names besides Lexus Martin such as Mercedes Bradshaw Porsche Hargensen, Heather Thompson, and Ferrari Clark. But he shrugs it off since nobody actually cares about the Raisins girls. He bets ten or twenty bucks that they didn't make it to the cheer team.

Tweek's point of view

I watch them do their auditions. Some did phenomenal to put me in shame; some did decently. Others didn't do well. I do feel bad for the other girls because they put their best efforts out to the cheer captain, judges, and the coach. The Raisin girls are no exceptions considering how they did their whore dances in front of them. One of the judges looks like he is about to have an orgasm and he's older than my dad and Stan's dad. Please tell me why the hell they hired him?

"Um…ahem," the cheer captain cleared her throat out, "That's very interesting… Tweek Tweak, you're up!"

I quickly come to the center where she, judges, and the coach are facing at me as she calls my name up. The horny judge gives me a weird look at me before another one nudges him. I guess he never sees a boy trying out cheerleading. I pick up the pom-poms from a chair. Tweek, you can do it! Do what Haidi taught you! Do what you've worked for!

"We are Cows, proud and true! Count on South Park, moo moo moo! Gooo Cows!" I chanted, shaking these pom-poms left and right and punching them up and down in the air.

Cue the music! (Song #5: "Finesse" by Bruno Mars ft Cardi B)

"5, 6, 7,8!" counting to the beat, I did a back handspring twice and back tuck once to land my feet on the ground. I twirl around as I grab the pom-poms on the ground.

No one's point of view

Tweek busts the moves as he did at the gym, letting his body flow to the beat. He tumbles, cartwheels, kicks, and did the spread eagle. Everything he dances is fresh, lively, and sharp. Everybody in the gym is mind-blown at the boy's movements. They never expected someone like Tweek to bring something amazing to the tryout. When the music comes to a finish, he hinges his leg and strikes a pose.

"Woah! Go Team!" he cheers with a genuine smile on his face, rattling the pom-poms in the air.

Everybody is shocked to erupt the gym a standing ovation to the blonde boy. Scott whistle loudly with his fingers at him.

"Yeah, Tweek!" Butters holler out loud.

"You go, Tweekie Bird!" shrilled Heidi.

Tweek's point of view

I am feeling so ecstatic to give my shot to try out for cheerleading. First is the audition for the talent show and now, cheerleading tryouts! I show them the real side of me. I show them I can be more than just 'Craig's boyfriend.' Why put up with Cartman, Craig, and everybody else? I prove them wrong I can be strong and independent. I don't give a crap what people says or thinks of me for a long time.

"He's a spaz!"

"Freak show!"

"Why can't he be normal"
"Ew, he drinks coffee all the times!"
"Dude, we can't work with this kid!"

Knock me however you want! Suck it, Cartman, Craig, and all these fucking Buddha Boxes! Because I am Tweek Tweak! Not Craig's boyfriend nor a spaz! Tweek Tweak!

Chapter Text

Chapter 5: Valentine's Day Sucks!

Tweek's point of view

2019 sucks! Valentine's Day sucks! Today is supposed to be a special day where love is in the air and people spend times with their soulmates. But no! Cartman has to fuck Valentine's Day up for everybody! Because of him and the Buddha Boxes, people are in their fucking phones! It's no surprise that every store closed on Valentine's Day while I'm here in the coffee shop working my ass/booty off! Un-fucking-believable! Great, I just throw the baked goods my parent brought them from the store away to make them from scratch for nothing! I even started grinding the fricking coffee beans in the fucking coffee machines! But hey, the coffee shop is a lot better than a certain somebody's house; thank god I dumped his ass! Should I be at home crying and binge-watching rom-com or sad movies?! Hell no, I am fucking better than this! I know how to get my shits together unlike certain somebodies! I'm not anyone's boyfriend, so do I have a ring on my finger!? Hell fucking no! I'm fucking done with guys anymore! You know who else is done with guys or girls stomping on people's heart!? Elle Woods from Legally Blonde, Torrance Shipman from Bring It On, and Bridget Jones from the Bridget Jones movies. Sure, they have their hearts broken in pieces by these jerks, but they find someone better than them in the end.

Look on the bright side, Tweek. At least you have times to try new recipes for Valentine's Day. That will your mind off of what's pissing you off. Second, there are people I know who deserve a valentine than these jackasses including Heidi, Token, Jimmy, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and the rest who are not in a Buddha Box. I can make them cupcakes, edible fruit arrangements, and drinks. Also, Butters told me about Scott's diabetes, so I think I can find something I can make for him without killing him. What if I put him in a coma!? What if he dies?! I don't want him to die because of me! Time to get some ingredients!

No one's point of view

Tweek take off, fold, and place his apron on the counter and turn off the lights. Flipping the sign over from 'open' to 'closed' on the door, he exits out and locked the door with his key. He swears if he left the coffee shop unlocked and unattended, the place will be robbed or worse! He brisks to the street to go to an organic supermarket. Heidi told him about the fruits and vegetables, dairy, and everything in the store are fresh from the farm without any pesticides or preservatives. He zooms in the market to grab and pay for everything he needs. Chocolates of all kinds, fruits, berries, vanilla beans, edible flowers, and other ingredients for baked goods and drinks. He carries bags of groceries to the coffee shop.

Tweek's point of view

I rush into the kitchen in the back to preheat the oven. Placing the bags of ingredients from the organic market, I rush to gather bowls, rolling pins, mixers, whisks, piping bags, skewers, knives, rubber spatula, baking pans, cupcake tins, cookie scoop, and measuring cups and spoons. What should I start with? Let's start with the cupcakes first and then fruit baskets. Maybe making drinks would buy me times to bake these pastries. I'm thinking of 'cherry and cinnamon mocha,' 'vanilla peppermint bark espresso,' 'iced rose and lavender latte,'dark chocolate velvet frappuccino,' 'dark chocolate and mint cappuccino,' 'caramel apple cinnamon macchiato,' and 'chilli pepper triple chocolate frappuccino.' Because cupcakes take 15-20 minutes or more if I can make something for Scott, I put the fruits and berries in the fridge.

No one's point of view

Tweek works through the bones combining and stirring the ingredients together to make the batter of different flavors. Dark chocolate, vanilla, and red velvet. He even did zucchini and carrot ones for Scott. Out of boredom, he hums and dances to the song he sang in the audition for the school's talent show. Placing cupcakes tins on all cupcake pans, he adds some cooking spray all over the pans and tins. He then scoops the batter into these tins one by one. As he put the pans into the oven, he moves on to making the frostings both sugar and sugar-free and syrups for the drinks from scratch. He rewrites down the menu on the board for the new drinks:

'Sweetheart' for 'vanilla peppermint bark espresso'

'Single Forever' for 'dark chocolate velvet frappuccino'

'Mr. Right' for 'dark chocolate and mint cappuccino'

'Heartbreaker' for 'cherry and cinnamon mocha'

'Handsome Devil' for 'chilli pepper triple chocolate frappuccino'

'The Apple of Tweekie's Eyes' for caramel apple cinnamon macchiato'

'Beautiful Nightmares' for the 'iced lavender latte'

'Sweet Dreams' for the 'iced rose latte'

These new drinks grab the attention of people coming to his coffee shop. Most of them are singles. Tweek expects them with their Buddha Boxes. He assumes nobody else bothers to come to his coffee shop. At the same time, he figures out that they come to his coffee shop because of their partners with their Buddha Boxes or they have nothing to do on Valentine's Day. He feels sorry for them since he can relate to his situation with his old flame thanks to Cartman and the Buddha Boxes.

The timer rings for the cupcakes to be taken out of the oven and chill on the cooling rack. He moves to chop up the fruits into hearts, flowers, leaves, stars, and moons; inserting them through skewers. He is proud of himself for slicing strawberries and tiny mangoes into roses much to his pitifulness. In fact, he did it without silting himself! He put them in the fridge and switches his focus on the cupcakes to take them on the counter. He ices them one by one at a time into roses. He garnishes them in ganaches, edible flowers, berries, and caramel.

As for Scott's, he takes extra care of them with some nuts on the carrot cupcakes and dark chocolate pearls on the zucchini cupcakes. The aroma of vanilla bean, cream cheese, chocolate, fruits, berries, and cupcake batters fill the kitchen to uplift the blonde boy. He put the bowls in the sink and cleans the kitchen until there are no spots left.

Tweek's point of view

The cupcakes look scrumptious to pack them in small boxes with notes I've written. As for the fruits, I position them in pots and ornate tissue papers. One, two, three, four, … Until I finish up to about fourteen arrangements. I search and take my phone to check the time. It is 5:59 pm?! Oh crap, I need to deliver them right now! There are so much stuff to carry! Wait, I remember I have a delivery bag and a big box. I carefully put the boxes of cupcakes in the delivery bad and the fruit arrangements in the bog box. Man, how can I carry these two without ruining them?! What if I can't make it on time?! What if it's too late?! I'm too young to die! Suck it up, Tweek! Do it for them! Do it for Valentine's Day! Even if I take it back about Valentine's Day!

No one's point of view

Tweek closed down the coffee shop and head out to the neighborhood to deliver the cupcakes and fruit arrangements on foot. Token (the coffee shop is near his house and he texts him about the cupcakes and fruit arrangements), Heidi, Bebe, Wendy, Jason, Dougie, Jimmy, Craig (he knocks on the door and surprise Tricia with these homemade gifts), Kenny, David (he goes to his restaurant and leave them outside to knock the door), Dougie, Scott, Butters and Kyle. The final destination is Stan's house which is in Tegridy Farm takes him an hour or so to get the job done. He scans the time on his phone. It is 6:45 pm!

Tweek's point of view

My job here is done from now on. My feet are killing me from so much walking to deliver them to my friends. The best part about this day is that I get to do something for them on this holiday called Valentine's Day. I feel proud to put my times and efforts to make and give them love on Valentine's Day; I want to see the looks on their faces when they see the gifts made from me. One thing I didn't know is that Stan lives in a weed farm instead of the neighborhood next to Kyle. Until Kyle told me where Stan's house is. Hmm... I wonder why. As I stride my way back to the town of South Park, I feel a drop of drizzle on my face. Oh crap, it's raining! Can this day sucks?! Then again, I am the only one without a special someone, so I guess Valentine's Day sucks even more!

I hurry to a nearby diner to take a seat at the corner. To give no fucks about Valentine's Day and mend my broken heart, I order chili cheese fries, a bacon cheeseburger with a side of fried calamari (extra garlic and cheese), spicy chicken Caesar salad with avocado, fettuccine alfredo with extra garlic, and iced cold water. What? I'm heartbroken because of Cartman and the Buddha Boxes, so I deserve this 'feast' fit for a queen. Are you calling me fat?! Gah, don't fucking judge me and shits like that! To complete my mood on Valentine's Day, the diner is playing my favorite song: "Thank U, Next" by Ariana Grande.

While enjoying a lovely meal alone in this diner, I glare at the lovey-dovey couples. I feel like a third wheel to put my head down in shame to sniffle and cry. It hurts to be around them with their PDA, cheesy romantic gestures and conversations, roses and flowers, and other shits. What's next, marriage proposals?

Cause his name is Tweekie
And I'm so good with that

He taught me love

He taught me patience
He handles pain
He's so amazing

Through the tears I shred out of my eyes, I slowly smile at the words in the song. Why feeling salty and bitter for myself because of him and them? Who loves me now? The answer is right in front of me the whole time. The only person who deserves love the most is me and only me. Why love someone else who never love me back when I fail to give love to the only person: myself. I love me for me inside and out and I should be grateful for myself.

I got so much love
Got so much patience
I've learned from the pain

I turned out amazing
I've loved and I've lost
But that's not what I see
'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)
Ain't no need for searching
And for that, I'll say

Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next (Thank you, next)
Thank you, next

I'm so fucking grateful for my ex
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Yeah, yee
Thank you, next
Thank you, next
Thank you, next

 

Chapter Text

Chapter 6: Mystery Guy

Warning: sexual harassment and suggestive languages/contents!

No one's point of view

"One time on Instagram, I saw Tweek wears an oversized sweater and thigh-high boots, so I wear an oversized sweater and thigh-high boots," said a girl with curly red hair and freckles who is wearing a baby-blue oversized sweater, galaxy leggings, and metallic purple thigh-high boots.

"I heard that Tweek broke up with Craig, so I broke up with Clyde," Lisa Berger stated.

"Tweek looks so gorgeous! My brother, Craig, is an idiotic fuckboy for letting him go over a Buddha box," commented Tricia to Karen.

"True and he made cupcakes and fruit arrangements for me and my brother on Valentine's Day," she tells Tricia.

"I want to know what's his secret for his body and skin," inquired Islah, squealing with Teresa.

"Tweek is so thoughtful for giving me a fruit arrangement and these sugar-free cupcakes on Valentine's Day," grinned Scott.

"I saw Tweek k-kills the a-a-audition with Ariana G-G-Grande's 'Thank You, N-N-N-Next'," stammered Jimmy, flashing his signature smile.

"I can't believe Tweek turns out better without Craig ever since Cartman started the 'Buddha box,'" Stan tells his super best friend, Kyle.

"Come to think of it, Tweek becomes a different person. He is breaking the ice to become a social butterfly who can stand on his own two feet," Kyle pointed out.

"He even made these Valentine's Day gifts for all of us. Except for Cartman for obvious reason! Aka Valentine's Day ruiner!" Kenny points at Cartman who is still in the Buddha box. Yep, Cartman is the one who fucked up Valentine's Day for everybody else.

"Agree," Token nods his head, "I got to hand it to Tweek because he did save Valentine's Day with these cupcakes and fruit arrangements he made. Thanks to him, I get to share them with Nichole. Aside from that, he takes care of us when our parents didn't give a damn about us at all."

"Hey fellas, guess what? Tweek made it to the cheer squad!" Butters addresses the news to the gang.

"What?! How do you know about Tweek's in the cheer squad?!" Stan inquires at the news of one of his friends in the cheer squad.

"I overheard Tweek's conversation with Heidi that he found his name on the list to see who made the cheer team," Butters notifies the gang.

Cartman lets out his usual pestering snickers, "Tweek's in cheerleading?! Gay! Cheerleading is for chicks! And here Tweek is now awesome and kewl! In anyone's dreams!"

"Look who's talking!" Kyle confronts his fat, manipulative, selfish, and insufferable frenemy. He remembers the shenanigans Cartman pulled in the past involving cross-dressing, "At least Tweek knows how to get his shits together unlike certain somebodies."

Token scowls at the chubby bigot called his classmate and "friend." Thanks to him, his parents and two of his friends completely didn't pay him attention. The only people he can turn to are Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Butters, Jimmy, David, and Tweek. Additionally, Tweek must assume and take on the role of a mother figure to the boys, Tricia, Ike, Dougie, and Karen when all of their parents do is being on their Buddha boxes 24/7.

"Yeah nice one, fatass!" he muttered out to Cartman.

"Whatever Kahl. Screw you guys, I'm going to where I can't be bothered by you making my anxiety worst!" Cartman walks away from Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Butters to go someplace else to deal with his "anxiety." They all roll their eyes at Cartman out of vexation.

"Hey guys," the five boys turn around to see Tweek who is wearing a pink chiffon short dress wrapped in a lavender ribbon, mauve sweater, and lavender ballet flats.

"Tweek, congratulation on making it to the cheer squad!" Butters claps for Tweek who is blushing.

"Oh, it's no big deal," Tweek softly smiles at Butters.

"Tweek, I want you to say thank you for the gifts you made on Valentine's Day," appreciated Kyle. "And I'm sorry about Craig, Cartman, and Buddha box."

"Same here," interjected Stan, "I saw you walking in the rain after you deliver these gifts at my door. Are you okay?"

"Hey, no problem. Kyle, I'm sorry how you put up with him the whole time," Tweek reassures Kyle as his smile saddens slightly at the mention of Craig, "I'm done with Cartman's bullshits. And Stan, of course, I'm okay."

"Eh, you and I are on the same boat when it comes to him," Kyle shrugged it off.

"Same here," Token included.

"Tweek, you look divine today," Kenny takes and kisses Tweek's hand, wiggling his eyebrows at him. As a bonus, he leans and embraces close to him to smell him, "My, my, Tweek, did you fell down from heaven because you look and smell like an angel."

"Thanks?" Tweek is stunned and flustered at Kenny's flattery. Should he be fancied by him? He looks at Stan and Kyle who are cringing at Kenny's "tangible" flirting and Butters in a weird look, "Umm... I should go because I need to go grab something in my locker."

As Tweek leaves, Stan nudges his orange parka friend on the arm, "Dude, what the hell did you do?! You make Tweek fucking uncomfortable!"

"Oh god," Token facepalms at Kenny's evident attempt to toy with Tweek, "I hope Tweek is okay, so I better go check up on him."

"Yeah Kenny, there is no way you can make a move on Tweek," suggested Kyle, "Besides, 'did you fell down from heaven because you look and smell like an angel' is really cheesy as fuck and getting old really fast. Second, don't treat Tweek like an object!"

"I mean you will face the wrath and lifetime of ass-beatings from Craig for trying to get Tweek in your pant, Kenny," added Butters. Even the innocent Butters knows what he is talking. Say to the boy who shows off his weiner to everybody at school during the 'Skankhunt' episode. He even the biggest weiner by 2.4 inches.

"Hey! Tweek broke up with Craig because of the fatass with his Buddha box and his anxiety bullshits, so technically he's single and free. So technically, Tweek isn't Craig's anymore," Kenny backs off, putting his hands up in the air in protest.

Tweek's point of view

I can't believe Kenny of all people! Fucking Kenny! He has the balls to woo me like every other guy! Ugh, Boys and men these days! All they want from me is to fulfill their sick desires and fantasies! They see me as just a fucking pretty face! I remembered one time some douchebag hitting on me at the gym; I hear a conversation between two guys about me in the locker room.

~Flashback at the gym's locker room~

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this juicy, sweet ass!"

"I want to grind and bang on that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

~Flashback ends~

I shake these horrible thoughts and images off of my mind. Thank you next, boys and guys! I twist and turn the combination lock to open my locker and get my stuff for my class. A fresh bouquet of pink, white, red, and purple roses falls out of my lap along with a piece of paper written in black ink cursive. Who put them in my locker? I unfold the letter to read them.

Tweekie,

Your eyes shimmer like the Aurora Borealis

Or the forest at dawn

Your hair is the light to my shadows

Your smile as warm as the sun to my moon

Your voice and laughter, music to my ears

Melts my heart to make a rhythm

Your lips are what I miss touching against mine

You're the person I want to give my heart to

The person I want to protect against bad things

The person I want to hold in the street

Kiss in the rain or anywhere else

The person I love eternally

Your curves and edges

Even if you're crying, I can't resist the beauty of yours

Your beauty is deeper than the cosmos or any galaxies

The person I want to call you mine

My darling, sweetheart, and everything

~ Secret Admirer

I find it sweet and charming of someone being a gentleman to brought me flowers and write me a love letter or poem. Unlike these disgusting, condescending, and arrogant pricks. They think they can take me for a fool to get down and dirty and left me in the dirt. I don't fucking think so! Especially you, Craig and Kenny! Too bad it is from a secret admirer.

"Hey Tweek, I'm sorry about Kenny," Token comes up to me.

"It's okay," I turn to him and walk with him to class.

"Congratulation on being in the cheer team, Tweek."

"No problem, Token. I'll cheer for you, Jason, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny."

No one's point of view

Unbeknownst to Tweek, someone is watching over him: a boy in a blue hat with a yellow puffball on top of his head, blue jacket, black pant, and black sneakers.

~ Time Skips (lunchtime!) ~

"Oh la la Tweekie! Look like you got yourself a secret admirer!" Bebe cooed at me as I give her the letter or poem. She then passes it onto Wendy and to Heidi.

"Hmm... who could he be?" Heidi examines the letter or poem and bouquet of roses, "It can't be Kenny because I know he can't afford this bouquet of roses at a fancy French flower shop." Oh, I forgot to mention how I told Heidi about Kenny's attempt to ruffle my feathers with his 'sexual advances'.

"First, you rock the talent show audition and cheerleading tryout and now you score yourself a cute secret admirer!" cheered Bebe in a singsong voice. Wow, I always thought Clyde is the only person who's an extra to annoy the crap out of everybody.

"How do you know?" I asked Bebe.

"Heidi showed me and Nichole the video of you at the tryout! I never knew you got some moves! You should be confident in yourself!"

"Since you're new in the cheer team, here's what we do in this team," Wendy instructed me, "We have cheer practices on Tuesdays and Thursdays after school at 3:30 pm until 4:45 pm. Usually, there are games on Fridays. We sometimes have cheer competitions and pep rallies on certain days and times."

"For the cheer uniform, you can wear a shirt and shorts or skirt," Heidi informs me, "I have a cheer bow I can give to you for your hair."

"I choose to wear a skirt and I don't give a damn about everybody's bullshits, so fuck all of them!" I said. Bitch please, the new Tweek is already slaying outfits of the days, talent show audition, and the cheerleading tryout; I make it on this team because I work my ass off on it. I even save Valentine's Day from being shitted on or fucked up thanks to this fat weasel!

*insert DJ horn sound effect*

watch?v=Ss7SRjiOCCs

Damn Tweekie, since when you're savage as fuck!" Bebe, Heidi, and I high-five each other.

I nod at Wendy. Cheerleading practices are on Tuesdays and Thursdays and cheering at games is usually on Fridays. At least I don't have to go work at my parent's coffee shop. In fact, if my parents aren't here in the coffee shop, then I've been in the coffee shop for nothing! For nothing! Hey, I have to work in this shop to help my-fucking-self! I'm acting like a single housewife and mother to them when their parents only give a shit that fucking thing over their own children.

Meanwhile, I'm still focused on the roses and love letter or poem. Who could've sent them to me? Sure, I am flattered by them, but should I find another guy or stay single? I don't want to be hurt in the process the way he devastates me. Heck, I'm over being toyed around in the name of love.

My first real break up with him is in a superhero game over the franchise plans between two sides: Coon and Friends and Freedom Pals. Sure, we have petty arguments at the beginning of this division. If wasn't for my dad, we never end up making up and working together as a team at Mr. Mackey's couple counseling by defeating the therapy kids. I eventually realize the mess made by Cartman. Gah! Here goes the 'Cartman show!' Fool me once, shame on me. This time, I'm not going to be fooled twice because of him, him, and them!

Craig's point of view

I'll be damned if Tweek broke up with me! I thought that spending times on the Buddha box is worthwhile for myself on my phone. To be honest, Tweek had been suffocating me with his constant needs and wants.

~ Flashback~

"Don't you wish you had more quality one on one time with your phone" Cartman persuaded me.

"On my phone?"

"I see it in you, Craig. With your parents and relationships? Imagine being able to shut them out for a little while, Craig, so you can focus on what matters. With Buddha Box, you can cut out all the unwanted noise. Not have to deal with conversations that are of no interest to you."

I sighed as I explain to him about my relationship problem with Tweek before he interrupts me by putting his Buddha box back on, "Well, I have to admit: sometimes, when me and Tweek are together it's... it's like he wants my attention."

~ Flashback ends~

Having some alone time for myself on my phone is satisfying. Scratch that, was satisfying. The freedom from my time on my phone recently wears me down. I feel sluggish and grouchy from not getting enough sleep; I get after-school detentions for being late to school (Like I care about going to school). My head hurts as fucking hell that I can't concentrate on anything. It is my fault for neglecting Stripes! Worst of all, it's awfully too quiet and boring. Something or someone is missing in my life: Tweek.

I haven't talked to him for who knows how many days, weeks, or months. From what I heard from Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Token, Jimmy, Butters and my own sister, Tricia, I never knew what Cartman's Buddha box idea do to my Tweekie. He is now relaxed, self-reliable, and confident. I get to see his lovable smile. Hearing his cute laughter gives me butterflies in my stomach to let out a sigh. He looks like a precious doll or angel in girls' clothing and makeups. I saw what Kenny did to Tweek with his kiss on the hand, eyebrow wiggling, taking him close to whiff him, and lame pickup-line. I'm going to beat the shit out of him for it! I mean if I saw Tweek in tight skirts, dresses, and pants, then I would be turned on! I enjoy the view of his ass! His ass is voluptuously large and perky that I, myself, want to touch or have on my lap! Yep. I, Craig Tucker, am an ass man for my Tweekie.

It's not like I steal one of the cupcakes (made by Tweek) from Tricia on Valentine's Day. Or how I check him out on Instagram and start liking his pictures. Or the fact I'm the one who knows the code to his locker to put the bouquet of roses brought from a French flower shop and love letter or poem I wrote for him. Do I miss him? Did I make a mistake of letting him go so easily?

Who am I kidding? Without Tweek on my side, I feel somewhat both guilty and empty. My universe is nothing than the stars and sun. I need Tweek! I want him back!

 

Chapter Text

Chapter 7: Sad Song and the Nightmare

No one's point of view

~ At the school gym~

Tweek and the rest of the girls who made it to the cheer squad are seated in the bleachers. They are given directions and safety within this team. Beginning to understand what to do, they went through warmups, jumps, tumbles, and other drills in cheerleading. Tweek is familiar with some of the moves Heidi showed him. However, there are new techniques he has troubles with, so Nichole provided pointers on how to do it.

"It takes time to get it, so don't be discouraged. Don't second guess yourself. It is only the first day," Nichole inspired him. Thanks to her, he tells himself, 'She's right, I can do it! I'm never giving up!' Sticking to his words, he persisted on applying corrections to the complicated techniques again and again.

"5, 6, 7, 8!" counted Wendy, the cheer captain, as she demonstrated the moves and chant to her cheerleading comrades.

"We are green, black and white! We are proud! We are true! We never hold back! We are here to show you what we got! Go Cows!" they intonated in sync.

~ Time skips (until 4:45 pm)~

"That's a wrap, everybody!" Wendy announced, "We'll continue this on Thursday! Do your best and don't give up!"

"Here are the cheerleading uniforms for you, Tweek," Heidi handed her blonde friend a neatly folded black, white, and dark green clothing. It looks new and fresh; not the old, smelly hands-me-down. "We have someone making these uniforms. By the way, I know you have a small waist, but a big booty. So, you're a size small for the shirt and skirt."

"Oh thanks, Heidi," blessed Tweek though he is slightly bashful of her mentioning him having a 'big booty.'

As Heidi and the girls are putting their things in their bags and leave to go home, Tweek goes to the opposite way to the gym. He knows that he dreads going to that place because of what happened with him and random guys; he has no choices on what place to go to practice his cheerleading.

Entering the gym, he signs up at the front desk and goes to the room. At the room, he first-handed does some warm-ups and stretches including ten pushups, sit-ups, lunges, squats, and miscellaneous workouts. It is excruciating to the point where he wants to take a nap. But he can't give up, so he must suck it up and deal with the pain. No pain, no gain!

He goes to a treadmill to do some jogging. Then, he presses the button to pick up the pace; he did get into a fiery competition with one or two people to see who can run on the treadmill the fastest or something. He could care less if he intentionally or unintentionally challenges them to a treadmill face-off.

'Bitch please, I run this shit like cardio! Fact!' he smirks at them and did his hair flip as if he imagines them as the Buddha boxes, Cartman, and Craig. In fact, he did remember the civil war between him and Craig over the franchise plan. Sadly, Craig defeated him, 'Ha! Take that, Buddha boxes, Cartman, and Craig! I'm slaying the game, so I give them a run for their money!'

He stops the treadmill to go to the next station which is where they have all of the equipment. Unfortunately, he feels a hand smack on his booty on his way. He darts to see one guy older than him giving him a wink and sadistic smile.

"Tight ass, sweetheart," his comment left Tweek blushing like a tomato. Tweek, bothered and enraged, is about to open his mouth to say something, but somehow stay quiet and submissive. He hesitates as his mind rings to the previous comments made from other guys he heard. Not to mention, how Kenny acted toward him in a similar manner at school. He wants to shrug it off, yet he feels a sense of something else.

'It is okay when Heidi comments me on my booty. With guys, on the other hand, it is weird,' he internalizes, 'Should I be okay with it?'

In the next station, he sets up some equipment to do tumbles, handsprings, backbend, heel stretches, and other acro exercises. He wants to make sure that he gets it better, so he practices them over again and again. His legs and arms are burning like a thousand of suns and as wobbly as jello to take a break.

Tweek's point of view

Cheerleading is a lot of work! I'm sweating and burning up to thousands of degrees! My legs and arms are hurting like hell! What if I have muscle cramps?! What if I dislocate my shoulder?! Or sprain my ankle?! I don't want to break bones or bleed out! I'm too young to die!

Catching my breath and wolf down some water and coffee, it's time for me to work on the choreography; I put all of the equipment away. I turn on some music on my phone and get into position.

~ Cue the music! (Song #1: "The Middle" by Zedd ft. Maren Morris)

"5, 6, 7, 8!" I count down to the beat to start his choreography. I glide agilely and energetically along the music with my body. I also infuse gymnastics and cheerleading moves into my dance. The way I light up his feet and having fun by twirling, flipping, and streaming with a smile on my face mirror the same fire. The same fire I had with Heidi in this place and at the cheer tryout.

So why don't you meet me

In the middle, In the middle, middle

As the song comes to the end, I finish off with a backflip split! Last, but not least: the cheer chant

"We are green, black and white! We are strong! We are brave! Come South Park fight, fight, fight! Go cows moo moo moo!" I shouted out as I did the bow-and-arrow motion left and right, low v, dagger, and high v, "C-O-W-S! Let's go cows, let's go!"

"Green, black and white! We are proud! We are true! We never hold back! We are here to show you what we got! Go Cows!" I clap along with the chant and punching my left fist in the air. In the end, I did a tuck jump, "Go team!"

I go toward my bag to check my phone. It is 6:50 pm?! Damn, how long I've been practicing?! I need to go home ASAP! As soon as possible! I grab my bag, pay the front desk with a $20-dollar bill, and exit out of the gym. It is dark outside with the exception of street lights. Oh man, it is scary as fuck! What if there are a bunch of dangerous people trying to mug or kill me?! Sure, I went to the gym from school by myself; getting home at night is a different story! Tweek, put your panties on and let's go home because there is no time to centralize my anxiety and who knows what! Gulping my fear and anxiety down my throat, I willingly stride through the streets. Should I be concerned, right? No, keep going! I am pretty sure that it's just only me, myself, and I and nobody else.

While walking, I feel someone's footsteps behind me. Should I look back or keep going? I peek slightly back only to see a silhouette of what I can try to assume. Maybe it was someone larger than me. Should I be intimidated by this person? Nah, maybe it is either just my imagination or something else. Of course, I can hear my heart pumping in the chest and the sensation of goosebumps!

I turn on my back once more to see this person 'catching up to me.' Holy shit! Is this person following me or something?! I don't want to end up dead somewhere else! Or have my body mutilated and thrown into a ditch or lake! Or worse! Sticking to these uncomfortable thoughts in my mind, I waste no time but make a run for it! Run, Tweek, run! Run like the wind! It horrifies the shit out of me that I have to hold my urge to scream. I never ran this fast in my entire life! My legs are going soft and numb like marshmallows. I can feel my feet excruciating to have scars, blisters, corns, or plantar warts!

Once I made it to my house, I turn the knob to find out it is locked. Oh wait, I forgot that I have the keys the whole time. I open and dig through my bag to hear tiny jiggling metallic sounds. I insert the key into the door hole and open the door at an instant. Shutting the door down behind me, I bolt the door solid shut. Fuck, there is the back door in the kitchen, so I rush to the kitchen to inspect the back door. To my relief, it is sealed completely. Phew! I need a nice warm bath because 1) I smell like the men's locker room and 2) I need to calm myself down after this incident which I'll be scarred for life!

But first, I open the fridge to grab two bottles of the lavender and rose lattes I made yesterday and chug them down. The floral and fragrant flavors from the flowers mix with the delicious coffee ease me to the core. Putting the two empty bottles in the recycling can, I grab my bag and go upstairs to my room. I set my bag down on the floor next to my bed to take out my phone. I get my pajamas and goes to the bathroom.

I fill the bathtub with hot water and a bath bomb which frizzles into a rosy pink hue. I submerge myself in the homely, aromatic tub where I did my little spa and bathe in sweet-scented soaps and shampoos. I drained the water down after finishing my mini 'boujee' bath. I puts on a dark green mini babydoll and black robe with pockets to stuff my phone inside; walk towards the bathroom sink to brush my teeth and apply toner and cleansing lotion on my face, neck, and shoulders.

Returning to my room, I dive down to his bed. I reach to grasp my backpack for my pencil and homework. Ugh! So much homework! To keep myself busy, I plug my earbuds in my laptop and turns on my music. Without Craig, I guess I gain various interests in music genres such as modern pop, R&B, and EDM.

~2 or 3 ½ hours later~

Phew, I'm fried from so many homework! English, social studies, math, and science! It is too much pressure! What if I fail?! I don't want to be held back in the fourth grade! Or be the oldest person to stay in the fourth grade! Or having to live in the street to sell my body to some creeps and pervs! The one thing to calm me down is music. Especially Camila Cabello's song called Consequences. Her song is the most beautiful of all because of the piano's melody and how it relates to me when it comes to my heartbreak to someone I know. I have anxiety today thanks to the person who's following me at the night I was about to walk home from the gym. Without a doubt, I can't believe a certain someone who chooses that thing over me; look who got nearly killed from walking home at night alone. Because of that experience, I learn to be cautious of myself from now on.

Camila's Consequences is perfect for the talent show! Oh no, I forgot about the talent show! I check my phone to see it is 10:45 pm. Tomorrow is Friday and oh god! I put my completed homework in my backpack, charge my phone to an outlet, and endeavor to sleep through the night. Every time I close my eyes, I have these uneasy hunches on the unknown person coming after me to harm me. I even wake up to the mental picture of this person breaking in my house to kill me and my parents. Though it is all in my head, it has me shuddering to curl myself in a ball and cry.

~The next day~

"Woah Tweek, you look very tired," Token raises his eyebrow at me concerningly, "Also, you look really pale today, so I got something for you."

He hands me a granola bar which I take and opens it up to eat my "breakfast".

"Oh, thanks Token," I give him a small smile and "tell" him, "I'm just beat from homework and stuff." I let out an awkward laugh. Indeed, I didn't want to inform Token about yesterday's "incident." I close my locker and trudges away to his class. If by means of trudging to class, I mean waddling like a penguin from both the treadmill and running from some creepy person.

No one's point of view

"What's up with Tweek?" Kyle asked Token, looking at him curiously.

"I don't know, but Tweek looks like he's going to burn out. He needs a break," Token voices out his regard.

~Time skips (school dismissed) ~

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let me my defenses

But loving you had consequences

Hesitation, awkward conversations

Running on low expectations

Every siren that I was ignoring

I'm paying for it

Loving you was young, wild, and free

Loving you was cool, hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let my defenses

But loving you had consequences

No, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Said, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Hey, yeah, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Mm

Loving you was dull, dark, and vain

Loving you will still take shots at me

From loving you was sunshine

But then it poured

And I lost so much more than my senses

Cause loving you had consequences

"Tweek, what are you doing here at the music room? Today's Friday," Tweek turns around to see Strong Woman.

"Just choosing a song for the talent show."

"The talent show is actually next Saturday," appraised Strong Woman, "You should go home and rest."

Tweek gets up from his seat, stuff his lyric sheets in his backpack, and push the seat in. He takes his phone in his pocket, "Thanks, Strong Woman."

"Tweek, are you sure you're okay walking home on your own?"

"Oh, it's okay, Strong Woman," he politely said to the female vice principal.

"All right then."

~Outside of school~

Tweek's point of view

I rush home and lock the door of my room. I am at ease to be home not really late, but I break down in tears on my bed. How can I deal with it?! What if this person who'd followed me at the night I was walking home from the gym is some maniac or something?! Who is this person?!

~ Flashbacks~

"Tight ass, sweetheart."

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this sweet juicy ass!"

"I want to grind and bang that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

"Tweek, you look divine," Goddamnit Kenny!

"My, my, Tweek, did you feel down from heaven because you look and smell like an angel," Kenny's voice and gestures by giving me the eyebrows and taking a sniff at me as a pervert pushes me over the edge.

~ Flashbacks end~

Stop it! Get out of my head! I wish they would just go away. Is it my fault for this situation?! What did I do to deserve this?! Is it the way I'm dressed or what?! Is it because I'm a homosexual?! Ugh, why should I be treated like a fucking vibrator to them?! I should've done something better than this! Goddammit Cartman and his Buddha box bullshits! I don't know who should I tell! Should I pretend that this incident never happened in the first place?! Am I safe wherever I go besides school?! What about the coffee shop?! The gym?! What people including my friends might say and think of me if I were to tell them about it?! What am I going to do?

 

Chapter Text

Chapter 8: Talent Show

No one's point of view

"Yeah, the dress is here!" Tweek rips open the cardboard box that has an Amazon logo. The blonde-haired boy clutches on the berry purple long dress, "Let's try it on."

~ 3-5 minutes later ~

Tweek's point of view

"Wow!" I look at myself in the mirror of my bathroom. The dress is classy, stunning, and fits like a glove. I'm like Giselle from Disney's movie, Enchanted. Except with blonde hair and is a boy. Overall, I'm at bliss that the dress looks exactly like the picture. Whoever thought buying a dress online isn't as bad as at the mall. The dresses at the mall are so expensive; I have the same anxiety and distress as last week. I remembered having a hard time breathing, trembling like an earthquake, and hysterically sobbing my eyes out to go back home!

~ Flashbacks~

I went to the fitting room to try on these dresses. As I was undressing, I feel powerful flashing moments of awful images and voices in my mind.

All of these voices resemble guys and men from the gym and of course, Kenny! Worst of all is that I have these nightmares. Nightmares of the same unknown person who followed me last week and these intimidating men and guys with these comments and vile gestures to me. I recall the same unknown person attack behind me on the street, lifting me up to violently kiss and touch me in this nightmare. Oh god, what if this same unknown person is going to kidnap and despoil me?! Or worse?!

"Tight ass, sweetheart."

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this sweet juicy ass!"

"I want to grind and bang that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

"Hey baby, you're looking fine today."
"Damn, I'm liking this view of you!"

"Just wanna ram you in bed until you moan!"

Why they are here in my head?! I don't want to see or hear them! They're freaking me out! Gah, I can't do this! It is too much! Out of sheer panic, I immediately change back into my normal clothes, take the dresses and exit out of the fitting room to return them back to the sale clerk, and leave out of the store and the mall. Again, I spend hours crying in my room until I blacked out thanks to exhaustion.

~ Flashbacks end~

I check my phone to see what time is it. It is 4:45 pm and the talent show starts at 6 pm. I waste no time prepping my makeup, straightening my hair, and putting out shoes and accessories which is a purple and silver hairbow clip, silver butterfly rings, and matching satin long gloves.

~ 45 minutes later ~

Holy shit, I have half an hour to get to the school for the talent show. I run out of the house and to the street like he's on a marathon. Because I'm wearing heels, my feet become sore and my dress is so long that I have to gather the skirt part of my dress up. I finally arrive at the school where I open the door and go to find the door of the auditorium. I continue up on the stage and to backstage where the other participants are getting ready and reciting their performances. I sit down on a chair and go through the lyric sheet, humming to memorize what's written on it. I hear a booming sound of a microphone and Jimmy Valmer's voice.

"W-W-Welcome everybody to S-South Park E-E-Elementary School Tal-Tal-Talent Show," Jimmy announced, "I'm Jimmy and this is Timmy."

"Timmah! Timmy!" Timothy Burch's voice echoed through the microphone.

"In this talent show, we will announce the p-p-performance per part-part-participant and do an award ceremony after the tal-tal-talent show," Jimmy flashes his million bucks smile, "Me and Timmy hope you enjoy this tal-tal-talent show."

~ 6 or 7 performances later~

What if I just froze up on stage?! What if I can't remember the lyrics or sing the wrong words?! Oh god! Suddenly, I hear one of the phrases in a Chris Brown song from one of the performances that go:

Just let me rock

fuck you back to sleep girl

don't say a word no

girl don't you speak

My whole body begins to heat and tense up. My heart is racing at high velocity. My eyes begin to water up as I'm holding my chest with both hands.

My mind whooshes back to the voices and another nightmare. This time, it depicts me on a couch with my wrists bonded by a belt and this same unknown person climbing above me to taking off his pant. What's tearing me apart are the voices uttering out revolting comments to me.

~ Flashbacks ~

"Tight ass, sweetheart."

"Ow, ow, baby got back!"
"Bang bang, baby!"
"Look at that peachy ass!"

"Nice legs, pretty boy!"
"Woah, you have a nice ass, cutie!"

~ Flashbacks end ~

"Tweek, are you okay?" Wendy's voice snaps me out of this torment, "Hey, hey Tweek, here's a paper bag and a bottle of water."

I open the bottle to steadily drink some water; I breathe heavily into a paper bag, watching paper bag inflate and deflate like a balloon. As I mustered my strength to calm myself down, Wendy wraps her arm around me and wipe the tears away with a tissue, "Thanks, Wendy."

"It's okay, Tweek," Wendy hushed me, "Tell me what's wrong?"

"I-I am… scared," I uttered out to Wendy. I feel terrible for lying to her, but I can't tell her about this situation of mine. I mean since the Buddha box episode, nobody cares about me and my issues. Not even my parents and him. Because of it, I'm on my own to deal with my issues.

"There, there Tweek," she hugs me.

"I don't know if I can go on!"

"Tweek, look at me," she cups my face and said, "You got this. You work very hard on this song. Forget about the Buddha box, Cartman, and Craig. Don't psych yourself out and do your best. I'm here for you."

"Up next is Tweek Tweak and he's going to sing "Consequences" by Camila Cabello!"

I look at her and she gives a thumbs-up. Thank you, Wendy, for shielding away the painful reminders. Thank you, Wendy, for giving me courage. Holding my head high, I walk onstage and face toward the audience. There are people I know in the audience such as Heidi, Nichole, Bebe, Butters, Scott, David, Token, Karen, Ike, and Tricia. Of course, Clyde and Craig are here. The music starts to play and I open my word to sing.

Dirty tissues, trust issues

Glasses on the sink, they didn't fix you

Lonely pillows in a stranger's bed

Little voices in my head

Secret keeping, stop the bleeding

Lost a little weight because I wasn't eating

All the songs that I can't listen to,

To tell the truth

Loving you was young, wild, and free

Loving you was cool, hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let down my defenses

But loving you had consequences

Hesitation, awkward conversations

Running on low expectations

Every siren that I was ignoring

I'm paying for it

Loving you was young, wild, and free

Loving you was cool, hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let down my defenses

But loving you had consequences

No, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Said, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Hey, yeah, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Mm

Loving you was dull, dark, and vain

Loving you will still take shots at me

From loving you was sunshine

But then it poured

And I lost so much more than my senses

I lost so much more than my senses

so much more than my senses

Cause loving you had consequences

Loving you had consequences

Loving you

The audience applauses as I smile and give them a bow. What's even better is how the burden of anxiety and distress is lifted off of me. I did it! I did it! I did it! I walk backstage and hug Wendy as a return.

"Thank you, Wendy," I tell her.

"Anything for a friend like you, Tweek," I smile at her while still in her embrace. Although, I hate hiding the truth from her, Heidi, or anyone else about my situation and how this situation is why I have a panic attack at the mall and here. How this situation is why I spend my time crying in my room at home. And why I feel trapped.

"Wendy, can I tell you something?"
"Sure, Tweek. What is it?"

"Umm... oh nothing," I deflated. Nice job, Tweek for holding back.

"I have faith in you, Tweek." Out of the corner of my eyes, I see another bouquet of fresh flowers which are white roses and gardenias and an elegant piece of paper. It must be from my secret admirer!

Can this day be a whole lot better than what I expected?! Stumbling on words, wailing, and other embarrassing things I might do to make a fool of myself?! Focusing on what's put me in a position to crumble?! No, I have good friends by my side! Wendy, Heidi, Bebe, Tricia, Ike, Karen, Butters, Scott, and anyone else I can think of.

I wish someday I'll tell them about my ordeal I'd experienced. If only I have the balls to do so. What if they hate me for it?! What if I'll end up losing them in the process?! I'll be alone or something! I guess it means I must handle my issues on my own.

Wendy's point of view

I feel bad for Tweek right now because I can tell he is not okay. I mean he turns out fine since he broke up with Craig. In fact, he did everything well for himself; cares about everybody. I remembered he made delicious cakes for the bake sale towards building shelters for homeless LGBT. He did awesome in this talent show with a song and is on the cheer team. He shows the fire, tenacity, and spirit in this team; that is what a cheerleader is about. He even steps outside the box when he's dressed in cute outfits and didn't care about everybody's judgments.

On the other hand, I'm worried for him and I hate to see him in a state of a panic attack. Maybe he overworks himself. Or something else. I saw him running out of the store, breathing heavily and quivering tensely with tears on his face; I need to know what's going on. Luckily, I'm glad I come to his aid for his panic attack before it gets worse. It pisses me off that Tweek is now struggling to cope on his own thanks to Craig, Cartman, and the Buddha boxes!

First, he plagiarized his essay back in the third grade to win the essay contest! Second is my presentation on breast cancer awareness! Third, he called me out on the school's morning announcements! Fourth is his "awareness" on suicide just for attention! Fifth is the abuse and manipulation towards Heidi! The last straw is his lies about anxiety and Buddha box crap! Oh, he will get it for sure!

Craig's point of view

I am so happy to see Tweek up onstage. My baby. My honey. The love of my life. He looks like a beautiful princess out there. His angelic singing makes my knees weak to the ground. God, I fucking love him! I love him so much!

"Wow Craig, you are a fucked-up idiot for dumping Tweek for a Buddha box," Clyde tells me, "

"Did so, Lisa Berger broke up with you because of that thing," I retaliated back to him, "Look who's not a ladies' man now."
"Take that back!" cried Clyde, "You can be a dick, dude!"

"Hey, you two are lucky that I take you to this talent show only because of Tweek," Tricia rudely insinuated that I flip her off, "By the way Craig, you owe me for this and the cupcakes you steal from me on Valentine's Day."

"Hey, I was hungry," I argued back at her. I don't have time for Clyde being a crybaby and Tricia being a pain in the ass.

"Say to the guy who eavesdrops on me about the talent show your ex is going to be in," Damnit Tricia! Yep, I did overhear her conversation with my cousin, Red about the talent show Tweek is in. I even overhear squealing about him singing to a fricking Ariana Grande song in the audition.

"Say to the guy who sent him flowers and sappy poems," she added. Double damnit Tricia! She can be annoying as fuck!

"Oh! you got told off by your own sister!" Clyde chimed in, "Tweek looks cute in a dress and makeups."

"Shut it, Clyde," I flip him off as well.

 

Chapter Text

Chapter 9: Panic Attack and Solace

No one's point of view

"Thank you, Tweek for helping me in my restaurant," David smile upon Tweek.

"Sure thing, David," welcomed Tweek, "Same goes to you for teaching me how to cook Hispanic cuisines."
"Hey, at least you're putting efforts into my foods just like the Valentine gift you made for me," noted David, "By the way, your performance at the talent show esta maravilloso."
"Umm..." The blonde boy bewildered at what his Latino friend is saying to him.
"Oh, I meant to tell you that your performance at the talent show is wonderful. Amazing." acclaimed David.

"Thanks," Tweek blushed at him. He is surprised at the compliment coming from David. He knows David is a nice guy he can trust among people like Stan, Kyle, Token, and Jimmy. Even the perverted Kenny which he forgave him. Unlike those guys and men he encountered at the gym. Still, he feels a sense of fear and doubts: 1) The fear of the same unknown person who "stalked" him on his way home from the gym and 2) the doubts of trusting guys and men after what they did to him.

"Don't be modest. You deserve some credits for your talent and hard work," insisted David, "Hey, I need ingredients for the tres leche cakes, flans, and pan dulces."
"I can take care of it for you," Tweek ventured, "I usually did deliveries for the coffee shop."

"Great! I have the list and money for you," David hands him a piece of paper written in blue-ink pen and a 20-dollar bill, "There is a local market in a Mexican plaza downtown."

"All right," Tweek exits out of the restaurant while looking at the piece of paper.

Tweek's point of view

I look at the list David gave me to buy at a local market in a Mexican plaza downtown.' On the list, it says sugar, dry yeast, flour, eggs, butter, evaporated milk, condensed milk, whole milk, heavy cream, chocolate, berries, cinnamon, and mango juice. I know where downtown is and it will take me about half an hour.

~ 30 minutes later of walking ~

Once I arrive downtown, I spot and go towards a large store that says "Fresco y Amor". Hmm... this market is as big as the whole foods market. I walk inside the market and I am flabbergasted to see the produce area, huge selection of delis, meats, fishes, and cheeses, and numerous aisles of foods, drinks, and other kinds of stuff. OMG, this is awesome! Oh god, what I am waiting for?! I need to get the ingredients for David.

No one's point of view

Tweek causally gather the things listed on this piece of paper from areas to areas. After he got everything according to the inventory, he goes for the register line. When it is his turn, he places the stuff on the conveyor belt. The cashier scans all of the items and Tweek pay him the 20-dollar bill. He puts the 20-dollar bill and kindly gives him some change.

As Tweek carries the bag of groceries out of the door, he unawarely strides by a boy who is seven or eight years older than Tweek. He is dressed in a black T-shirt, denim sagging jeans, Jordan shoes, black leather jacket, and chains. His black hair is styled into a mohawk with hair mousse or gel; also has tattoos on his left arms.

He looks over at Tweek where Tweek bends over to pull his socks on. Licking his lips and wearing a deviant look on his face, he takes it an opportunity to sneak up on him and did the unthinkable.

Tweek's point of view

Pulling my socks on, I jump up to someone's groping my ass. I turn to see a boy much older than me who is smirking at me. He looks like he could in a gang or jail.

"Nice ass, fag," he taunts me in a husky, horny tone. Excuse me, mister?! How dare he calls me the F-word and talk to me like I'm a piece of meat to him!?

"What do you want from me, jackass?!" I tell him off. I try to sound very dominant to that jerk.

He deeply chuckles at me and grabs my face to forcefully look at him. He replies to me depravedly, "You're so cute acting all feisty and shit. I love it when you're playing hard to get, kitten."

Is that douchebag is for real to have the balls to say that to me in public?! I want to smack him and tell him to back off and leave me alone. Before I could, he roughly shoves his lips onto mine. He fucking kisses me! He tastes like cigarettes and alcohol! I want to get out of here! I want to get away from him! I never want to see him again!

I try to push him off of me, but he is too strong. So, I bite his lips off and shove him off of me. I pick up the groceries David needs for his restaurant and take off. I just keep going and never turn back that creep after what he did to me! I don't care if my feet become sore from all this running! He fucking crosses the line with me! I can't get him out of my head; they're coming back! Oh gah, they're coming back! It is too much pressure!

~ Flashbacks~

"Tight ass, sweetheart."

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this sweet juicy ass!"

"I want to grind and bang that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

"Hey baby, you're looking fine today."
"Damn, I'm liking this view of you!"

"Just wanna ram you in bed until you moan!"

"Ow, ow, baby got back!"
"Bang bang, baby!"
"Look at that peachy ass!"

"Nice legs, pretty boy!"
"Woah, you have a nice ass, cutie!"

~ Flashbacks end ~

David's point of view

I hear the bell rings from the door. I see Tweek is here with the ingredients I need for my restaurant. However, I can also notice Tweek is shedding tears from his green-hazel eyes. His eyes and face are red and puffy; he is holding his chest, gasping for air.

"Que pasa? What's wrong, Tweek?" I pull Tweek in an embrace.

"I...I...I," he tries to explain to me what's happening to him. He looks like he was about to break down or pass out, "He... He... He..."

"Shh, esta bien. It is okay Tweek," I hush and comfort him, "Let's go outside, so you can calm down. Okay?"

He nods at me and I take him through the kitchen to the back door. Opening the door for him, I go outside with him to sit down. I want to know what's going on with him to be in this upsetting position. It takes about half an hour or 45 minutes of him to collect himself.

"I... I... I... He... He..."

"Take your time, Tweek. Dime que pasa, amigo?" I patiently wait for him to hear him out.

He takes a deep breath and quietly, "Can you promise not to tell anyone?"

"I'm all ears and here for you, amigo."

"Umm... after I paid for the stuff you need for the restaurant, as I was pulling my socks up, I..."

"Go on, Tweek."

"As I was pulling my socks up, I was touched behind by a boy much older than me," I listen as he steadily working on his side of the story, "I remembered he wears a black T-shirt, denim sagging jeans, Jordan shoes, black leather jacket, and chains. His hair is black and in a mohawk and has tattoos on his left arm. He...umm..."

"What did he do or say to you?"

"Well, he... he says that I have a 'nice ass' and called me the F-word. I told him off and he grabs my face and retorts me with 'You're so cute acting all feisty and shit. I love it when you're playing hard to get, kitten.' It pisses me off that I wish I could tell him to back off and leave me alone, but he kissed me! he fucking kissed me!" I lean down on him, so he can put his face down to cry on me.

"Tweek... Lo siento. I'm so sorry," I let him know of my sympathy for him, "He is an asshole for putting a hand on you."

"No, it is my fault for letting it happen to me! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

"Don't say that. It is never your fault. He did this to you. What he did to you is awful."

"I wish this couldn't happen or at least pretend this didn't exist."

"Hey, hey. at least, you come to me to talk about it" I said to him, "Did you tell anyone else besides me?"

He shakes his head and said, "Everybody is busy on their phones, so they don't give a damn about it. I can't even tell Heidi, Wendy, Token, Stan, Kyle, or anyone else. I'm scared of what they're going to think and say about it."
"Again, it is never your fault. I'm not mad at you for what you're dealing with right now"

"There is also one thing or two I haven't talk to you about and why I'm freaked out about it. It happened last week ago," he added.

"Tell me more."

"I recalled hearing these horrible comments about me at the gym. One guy slapped my ass one time and called me 'sweetheart.' The scariest is when there is someone 'following' me when I was walking home from the gym."

"Oh my god. Tweek, I'm sorry that you have to go through this alone," my blood boils at the guy who groped and kissed him and all of the guys who put Tweek through hell. I can imagine Tweek being disturbed by these incidents from them.

"I am terrified right now. I can't eat, sleep, or do anything because of it. I spent my time crying in my room."

I am also enraged at that fatass, Cartman and Craig, Tweek's boyfriend. Because of them, I have to work so many hours in my parents' restaurant! If it wasn't for them, Tweek would've been scarred for life! Look at him! He's scared and he cried his eyes in his room! He can't eat, sleep, or go anywhere else! Craig supposed to be there for Tweek. But instead, he rather be on his phone to never give a damn about him.

"Tweek, I can protect you at all causes. I don't want you to suffer like this."

"David, it's sweet of you to do it for me but I can handle it myself. I have recovered from it."

"No, Tweek. You have endured too much pain and anxiety. Let me protect you from all of the bad things. In a meanwhile, I'm going to cook you something."

"Umm... it's okay. I'm not that hungry," I can hear his stomach growling like wolves in the street of Idaho.

"I think your stomach says otherwise."

No one's point of view

David cooks some food for Tweek. After Tweek finishes his meal of the day, David cheers him up with things that make him laugh.

"So, you gave him a burrito with your father's semen? That is so gross and mean. At the same time, he did deserve it because he's nothing but an asshole." Tweek giggles at David. Tweek is glad that he has someone like David he can talk to about what he'd dealt with since the Buddha box episode.

"Hey, you're right about him. I put up with his racist remarks for way too long and he claimed to be a Yelper as an excuse to be a major asshole," David admitted to Tweek. Of course, it makes him laugh even more to let out a snort. David is happy to see the admirable smile of the blonde-haired boy. He looks through the window to see it is dark outside, "I am taking you home. Do you know where your house is?"

"Oh, my house is in the neighborhood where Kyle lives," he informed the Mexican boy.

"Okay, let's go. First, I have to close the restaurant," He puts on a coat and turns off the lights. Opening the door for Tweek, he shuts and locks the door. He grabs Tweek's hand and continues on the street of South Park. Since it is cold outside and Tweek is wearing a short-sleeved short dress, David wraps himself and the coat around Tweek.

"Thank you, David."

"No problem. Oh, one thing," he bends down to kiss him softly on his forehead, "You deserve to be shielded from terrible things out in the world. Especially these people."

"I love you like a brother."

Chapter Text

Chapter 10: There for Him

No one's point of view

"Ew, Tweek looks like a girl and a hippie!" bantered Cartman at Tweek and David, "Tweek, why are you with that Mexican boy? Should you be with your boyfriend, Craig?"

Tweek and David continue to walk down the hallways, completely ignoring their obnoxious, fat classmate. The two boys know that Cartman is causing too many troubles for everybody else. It is getting old really fast; Tweek learns that it's better to never care about Cartman and his bullshits.

After all, it is his fault for the pain, anxiety, and conflicts Tweek have to suffer through. Not to mention the circumstance regarding how one creep harassed Tweek by groping and kissing him without his consent. Still, Cartman and the Buddha box impact him into the better person he becomes. If it wasn't for them, then he wouldn't have good friends such as Heidi, Bebe, Nichole, Token, Jimmy, Wendy, Butters, Scott, and anyone else. Especially David who is the only person he reaches out to and understands his issues.

"Thank you for taking me home," gratified Tweek, "I really enjoy your company. You're a nice guy."

"Hey, that's what friends are for. Just letting you know that you don't deserve the pain from them," David reminds Tweek, "I would've beat the shit out of that fatass, Craig, and the creepy pig for what they did to you. Unlike me, you're the kind of person who doesn't do revenge."
"That's true. I mean..." Before Tweek can say anything, Tweek and David come across Kyle.

"Hey Tweek, I see you're getting along with David," noted Kyle.

"I helped him out in his restaurant. He did a great job teaching me about Hispanic cuisines," Tweek tells his Jewish friend, "He also keeps me company. Don't worry, me and David are just friends."

"Yeah, I saw you walking with David," added Kyle.

"Tweek told me where his house is, so I can take him home safely,"

"That's nice of you, David," Kyle praises David.

"He did make me laugh about how David made a burrito with his father's 'sauce' for Cartman," Tweek happily suggested it to Kyle which Kyle cracks at what the blonde boy is talking about along with David.

"Yeah, he has it coming for the bullshits we put up with," David mentions to Tweek and Kyle.

"Agree," Kyle and Tweek chimes in unison.

Ring! Ring!

"Oh god, we have class," groaned Kyle.

"Oh no, I don't have class with you," Tweek saddened as he says bye to his friends and takes off, "I will see you at lunch."

David sighs and turns to Kyle, "I guess you and me have Cartman in Mrs. Nelson's class."

"Oh god, why him?!" David grunted and advise Kyle, "But let's just ignore him. Don't acknowledge him."

The two boys nod at each other and walk together to Mrs. Nelson's class.

Tweek's point of view

"All right class," my teacher, Ms. Wilde announced, "Today, we are going to do an assignment on creative writing. Creative writing is something you are free to express yourself but are difficult to do so. You can do either a narrative paragraph, short story, poem, or a song about whatever you want to present yourself. If you have troubles coming up with your writing or need help, don't be shy to ask me."

One kid raises his hand and said, "Do we have to present it to class?"

"If you like, it's totally fine," she said, "You can turn it either hand-written or type on Google Docs and send it to me Google Classroom. It's on due on Wednesday, but we're only doing a rough draft. Get to work and try your best please."

As everybody is taking out a paper and pencil out of their backpacks, there are the morning announcements chiming in during class. They usually publish on clubs and organizations, fundraisers, and what to do if staying after school. Until…

"On Friday, we have a football game against our school rival, The Beavers next Friday. Come on and cheer South Park's Cows for the victory! Woah!"

~ Time skips (Lunch!) ~

I text Kyle and David on my phone.

Tweek Tweak: "Hey guys, I'm busy doing a creative writing assignment for Ms. Wilde's class, so I'm going to be at the library."

No one's point of view

~ Meanwhile at the school cafeteria~

"Hey Stan and David, Tweek is at the library to work on an assignment for Ms. Wilde's class," Kyle informs Stan and David as they grab their foods and sit down to eat. Unbeknownst then, someone overheard their conversation: Clyde Donovan.

"Tweek is very busy lately," Stan points out to Kyle and David.

"Yeah, Tweek helps me at the restaurant," David

"I know right, Tweek quits the sports team for cheerleading," David listens to his friend, nodding at the information from him. Though he promises to keep the discussion between him and Tweek a secret, he feels guilty for hiding it away from Kyle.

"Ms. Wilde is a new teacher from Lima, Ohio," said Stan.

"How you did know?" Kyle inquires to his super best friend.

He shrugs at him before the three boys continue munching on their foods.

Craig's point of view

"Tweek is in the cheer team with a bunch of girls?!" Clyde blurted out, "How I didn't know about it?!"
"Umm...is it you're always in your Buddha box to not bother about it?" grumbled Token, "What am I? Chopped liver? I already know about that last weeks ago."

I spit my milk out of shock. What?! Tweek is in cheerleading?! How I didn't know about it?! Other than the fact that I half-listens to Red and Tricia about that news. Tell me more about how Tweek is doing without me!

"I also overhear David and Kyle that Tweek is in the library, doing an assignment for Ms. Fabray's class. I wish I can in her class someday," I roll my eyes at him. Of course, Clyde is now crushing on the new teacher, Ms. Fabray.

"Clyde, what do I tell about eavesdropping on others? You can't butt in people's businesses," Token lectures Clyde like a mother. I get up and throw away my lunch in the trash.

"Hey, where are you going?!" I hear Clyde's voice booming in my ears.

"I am going to the library," I answered.

"Something tells me it is going to be a bad idea," Token scoffs, "There's no way you can go and find Tweek to talk to him. He's over you."

"Fuck off, I want to see Tweek," I flip Token off and zoom out of the cafeteria in search for Tweek. How could Tweek be over me in 'I don't know how many days or weeks?'

~ 15 minutes later ~

I inhale as I turn the knob and open the door of the library. I scrutinize around the area for Tweek. Until I spot someone's head, blonde hair, is laying down on the table. Blonde hair?! Bing, it is Tweek! He wears a light greenish-blue floral long-sleeved short top, blue shorts, and dark grey boots. His eyes are half-lidded which I can tell that he's half-sleeping. Hmm... he must be tired or something; he looks absolutely dainty!

I was about to approach him quietly until I hear whimpering sounds coming from him. Like he's crying. What's wrong with him? Why is he's crying? He gets up, puts his burgundy hat on, and packs his stuff away in his backpack to leave. He didn't notice me, so I follow after him where he runs out of school. Since I have long legs, it is easy for me to catch up to him. Once I find him going halfway toward his house, he nearly trips; I reach out to catch him. His hands cover his face as I hold him in my arms.

Too bad, I can't bring him back to school. If Clyde, Token, Jimmy, or anyone else saw me with a crying Tweek, then it would've been awkward. Plus, they'll think I'm a heartless jerk to Tweek which I am not. I guess I have left no other choice but to skip school to take him home to his house.

I make my way to his house. I open the door and get inside. Closing the door behind with my foot, I carry Tweek princess-style upstairs and to his room. So what if I'm his ex and ex shouldn't do that?! At least I care about Tweek more than anyone else in the world. I'm sorry for making Tweek sad because of the Buddha box and Cartman!

I lay Tweek down on his bed and take his hands off of his face. I strap off his backpack to place it on the floor adjacent to the side of his bed. My heart aches to see his pretty face drenched in his own tears and smeared makeups. Time to wipe the gunk on his face clean. Wait, how the fuck to remove the gunk called makeup off his face?! Our moms and girls in my school know about makeups more than us and our dads! Then, there is Tricia and Red. Despite her being six or seven years old, I remembered her wearing makeups when either playing with dolls or on her iPad or phone. Red is my cousin, so she knows a lot about makeups, but I forgot that she's mad at me for ditching Tweek for that thing.

I pull my phone out of pocket and text Tricia.

Craig Tucker: "Hey Tricia, do you know how to remove makeups? I'm with Tweek at his house."

Tricia Tucker: "Craig, why are you in his house? I swear to fucking god if you ever try to do something with Tweekie Bird, Craig Thomas Tucker! Craig Thomas Tucker now wants Tweekie Bird back?!" 😡

Craig Tucker facepalms at what Tricia have texted him. At the same time, he never knew that Tricia calls Tweek by a nickname. Tweekie Bird. I wonder why.

Craig Tucker: "Listen you little shithead, I may have fucking hurt him, but I just want to see him right fucking now! Tell me how to remove fucking makeups off his precious face!"

Tricia Tucker: "All right. To remove makeup, you can use makeup wipes, makeup removers, or baby oil if Tweek has those in his house. You can find them in Tweek's bathroom."

Craig Tucker: "Thanks."🖕

Tricia Tucker: "Np, Craigo the fuckboy." 🖕

Craig Tucker: "Hey, I care about him and love him indefinitely!" 🖕

Tricia Tucker: "Whatever, Romeo."

I turn off and put away my phone in my pockets to go to the bathroom to find a bottle of makeup remover, makeup wipes, and those white round things. They are in a basket next to a shit ton of makeups! Goddamnit, how did Tweek can afford these things!? One thing I don't like about makeups besides being a guy and I think makeups smell shitty is the cost! They cost more than what Token brought! As I grab them all, I look at the trash can to see numerous multicolored streaks of stained wipes and round things. Geez, why Tweek need to wear that much makeups?! I also grab a small towel and turn on the water from the bathroom sink to soak and wring it.

I return back to his room and to Tweek. Even still in a daze, he looks so cute! Sitting on his bed, I position his head on my left hand and his shoulder on my lap. I pull the makeup wipes out and start polishing his whole face. Because he's caked in makeups, I have to tear a bunch of wipes out and pour the makeup remover on his face. With every wipes and splash of makeup remover, I am able to get them off of his face; I wash his face clean to see the natural beauty of the love of my life. Honey, you look so much better without the makeups.

I hear a little sniffle from him as a couple of tears drizzle out of his eyes. I kiss him on his forehead and cheeks.

"It's okay, my angel," I whisper to him, swabbing tears off of his face. I'm sorry Tweek for making you cry. I'm sorry Tweek for giving you the pain you have to put up with. I'm sorry Tweek for not being there for you.

I get up from his bed and take the towel, makeup remover, and dirty wipes and round things to the bathroom. I throw shit tons of soiled wipes and round things into the trash can and put the makeup remover and towel back to the sink. I reenter to his room to lay on his bed next to Tweek. I come close to him and cuddle him to give him a soft peck on the lips.

"I love you," I said to him before letting out a yawn and drifting myself to sleep beside him.

Tweek's point of view

~ 4 or 5 hours later ~

I open my eyes and get up to be in my room. Hmm… how did I get here? I trace back to the last time I was here before home. I remembered trying to think of creative writing for Ms. Wilde's class and the next thing I know is that I'm crying in the library to run out of school and almost to my house. Wait, who took me to home?! I look to see my ex sleeping peacefully next to me. Should I hate him? I'm still hurt and betrayed by him, so I feel my hand is moving toward his face. I want to slap him in the face for abandoning me for that thing! Instead, I caress his face gently and kiss him on the cheek. What am I thinking?! Do I still have feelings for him? After what he'd put me through? The tears I poured out every day and night for him and them?! Especially, I have to deal with that guy from outside of the market! I don't know if I love him or not. He is the first boy I ever loved and lost. Love is complicated. I'm glad Heidi is single without that fat weasel!

As I rose up, I dig into the pocket of my shorts for my phone. I turn it on to see it's 5:00 pm. Did I pass out? Dang it! Then again, I find one text message from David that reads:

David Rodriguez: "Tweek where are you? I haven't seen you in school."

I tap on the text message and type down:

Tweek Tweak: "Sorry David, I somewhat pass out and now I'm at home." 😔

David Rodriguez: "It's fine, Tweek. Give yourself a break because it is my day off from work as well. I have homework to do. How's your creative writing assignment for the new teacher, Ms. Wilde?"

Tweek Tweak: "Still working on it. I forgot to tell how I'm at home and you couldn't believe."

David Rodriguez: "Tell me."

I take a deep breath and write down what happened at the time of how 'I got home.'

Tweek Tweak: "At the library, I've been having these uncomfortable thoughts about the 'thing' we discussed on. It is too much pressure on me to the point I want to get out of school to stay home and cry in my room. Craig is there at my home, so I figure he's the one who took me home."

David Rodriguez: "What? Why Craig of all people? I'm going to beat the shit out of him for what he did to you."
Tweek Tweak: "Hey, you don't need to because I don't resort to retaliation and remember that it is Cartman's fault for it. At first, I was mad at him, but I realize that from how he took me home, he really cares about me."
David Rodriguez: "I guess you do have a point. I hope Craig isn't going to hurt you or something."

Tweek Tweak: "Let's hope for the best. I have to go. Nice talking to you."

David Rodriguez: "Anytime, Tweek. Bye."

Tweek Tweak: "Bye."

I turn off and set my phone on the dresser. All this crying and passing out makes me want to take a hot bath. I arise to get my pajamas and go to my bathroom.

~ At the bathroom ~

"Ahh..." my body tingles when stepping in this relaxing bath I made from hot water and bath bomb. I did my usual routine of washing myself in shampoos and soaps and giving myself a facial spa; I brush my bath and moisturize myself with a toner and cleansing lotions after I finish my 'luxurious' bath. I put on a white lacy babydoll and exit out of the bathroom to go to my room. Of course, Craig is still snoozing in my bed. Despite how he's never there for me, I thank him for this day. I still love him. Still, that doesn't mean I'm getting back together with him. I want to teach him and Cartman a lesson on what they'd put me through. How I learn to get my shits together whenever I have anxiety. How I learn to 'be capable more than I think.'

~ Flashback (The Yaoi Episode) ~

"You can do it, Tweek! You're capable of more than you think."

"I'm a terrible actor!"

"You just follow my lead, and try and make it believable, okay?"

"Oh, gah-okay. Oh, God!"

~ Flashback ends ~

They don't know what I'd been through to get where I am now. Because of them, I am now living in fear, pain, and vulnerability over sexual advances from guys and men. Mostly this older guy who groped and kissed me outside of the market. I settle myself down on my bed to slumber.

Oh, I give him one last kiss on the cheek.

"I love you," I uttered out him if only he knows. If only he knows. Thank you, next, Craig.

Chapter Text

Chapter 11: On the Edge

Disclaimer: I don't own the songs or anything else. The songs Single Ladies belongs to Beyoncé, Kill This Love belongs to a K-pop girl group, Blackpink, and the reference to a song, Thank U, Next belongs to Ariana Grande.

Warning: Mild NSFW, sexual harassment, violence, rape, and other things considered inappropriate and graphic!

Craig's point of view

I wake up to find Tweek next to me. My face heats up when I see Tweek looking so sexy and angelic in a nightgown. He never wears anything flirty or scandalous. He has the face of an angel, but the body of a devil! I mean white highlights his creamy pale skin and lovable character. Or how transparent the nightgown is to let me see peeks of his skin. What hits a home run is the white panties that reveal his curvy hips and thick thighs. These hips and thighs had me horny and hungry!

I lick my lips at the sight of them. Damn, Tweek, damn! Tweek, you're such a tease and I love you even if you broke up with me! A naughty boy! How come I didn't get to see that side of you?! I'm a dumbass for missing out on it! I would've imagined him sneaking into my room dress up like that in my dream! Enjoying the sensations of Tweek's lips when he and I kissed, the sounds of him moaning for me, and the urge to touch his body in any other ways.

~ Craig's dream ~

"Oh, Craig!" Tweek runs towards me as I hold out my arms to embrace him. His face pressed against my chest, "You had me worried sick!"

"Miss me?" I smirk at him as I grab his chin up to my face see the innocent look on his face. How adorable of him.

"Pfft! In your dreams, dick!" Tweek huffs out in anger and slaps me in the face. I know I deserve it, but the slap from him turns me on even more, "You dumped me for that thing. Motherfucker!"

"You're so cute when you're feisty," I place my lips on his neck. I chuckle at how he tries to push me away or hit me in the shoulders or chest, so I snatch his hands to control him. Even in my dream, I can imagine Tweek's mad at me because of the Buddha box. He is so damn sexy when he's acting like this to me.

"Fuck you!" He hisses from the kisses I give on his neck, "You're bluffing me."

"Damn Tweekie, keep playing hard to get and I'm turned on even more," I purr at him. One of my hand travels down from his waist to his thigh and my other hand cups his face to give him a big kiss. When kissing him, I sink my teeth into Tweek's lips which Tweek attempts to fight his urge to resist. Ultimately, he gives in to the point he becomes a mess of pleasure.

To up the ante, I grab his ass and jam myself against his hips. I start off slow and steady as I grope his cute, perky ass. I speed it up to pound him harder and harder to make him cry even more out of desire. I even spank him on his ass as payback for hitting me.

"Oh, C-Craig! Craig, you fucking pervert!" he turns to kiss me. He sounds infuriating; however, I can tell he's hiding his lust from me. Damn, he is such a minx and an angel, "You don't know that you're driving me crazy!"

"I know, honey," I persist on making out with Tweek. Again, I bite down his lips as a command to open his mouth. This time he obeys me; I slip my tongue to explore his mouth, "You're a great kisser, babe."

"Gah! Oh, Craig! Oh, you dirty bastard!" he moans out to me as his hands are clawing on my back, "Craig, can I touch your penis?"

"Honey, why not do this in the bedroom?" I look at him slyly. I take a handful of his ass before I spank him. I am so happy to be an ass man for Tweek, "I can take a gander at your asshole."

"Will you discard me like other rude fuckboys?" His vexation waters down to sadness as his beautiful eyes become teary. His face presses against my chest as I hear him sniffling and weeping. Even in my dream, I feel guilty for walking out of the door for something materialistic and superficial. I feel guilty for the pain and heartbreak Tweek have to put up with. I know why he has every right to be mad at me.

"No, I won't discard you like these assholes. I promise I always and will never hurt you," I cup his face to give him kisses on his forehead, "You're my princess."

"For a tough sexy man, you have a heart of gold. I love it and I love you," he kisses me one more time, "I'm sorry for bothering you, Craig."

"Don't be, I'm sorry for leaving you in the dark. I love you, too Tweek." I carry him just like I did yesterday noon or afternoon. Yep, Princess-style because not only it's nice and boring just the way I like it. I want Tweek to be treated like a princess. My princess to his knight in shining armor.

"Of course, Craig. Let do this in the bedroom."

"My pleasure, princess."

~ Craig's dream ends ~

I put out my phone to see it's only 4:45 am early in the morning. I should be home around 6 am or so. I'll be going to be bitched by the little monkey-ass aka my sister, Tricia as well as my friends for it. Like I said to them: Fuck off! My stomach growls to signal me to eat some breakfast. I expect my stomach to wake Tweek up.

I turn toward Tweek who fortunately is still asleep like Sleeping Beauty. Smiling at him, I slope closer to softly kiss him on the lips.

"Sleep tight, my princess. I love you and I always and will never hurt you," I rise from his bed and exit out of his bedroom to go downstairs. I go to his kitchen and pop open the refrigerator to see only eggs, three cartons of coconut and almond milk, loaves of bread, few berries, butter, and bottles of some weird liquids. It is brown which I can assume it is coffee; it infused in pink and purple. Tweek's parents didn't even bother to buy some groceries at all. Tweek could've starved to death. Oh wait, it's all because of that fatass! I guess it's time to go to a 24/7 convenience store.

I took maybe one or two bottles of these weird liquids before closing the refrigerator door and wolf them all down. These weird liquids sure taste like coffee, but I can savor the sweet and flowery flavor: roses and lavender. I race upstairs and into his room to grab my stuff; come back downstairs. It's a good thing I have my wallet in my backpack if I want to buy something.

No one's point of view

Craig goes outside and makes his adventure to the 24/7 convenience store in the cold early morning.

~ 15-20 minutes later (thanks to Craig's long legs) ~

He eventually makes it to the 24/7 convenience store. He enters himself inside to search for the foods for Tweek. He manages to find a jar of Nutella, bananas, canned spam, shredded cheese, pancake mix, oranges, and whipped cream.

'Hmm… I can make him pancakes and scrambled eggs and spams with toast,' he thoughts to himself, 'I know it's cheesy as fuck, but this breakfast can make Tweek so happy.'

After he got what he needs, he goes up to the checkout counter and paid the things to a chubby middle-aged white guy (comically resembles a grown-up version of Cartman that Craig tries to suppress his laughter to himself).

He quickly brisk-walk to Tweek's house to begin prep cooking in his kitchen. He combines the pancake mix and the ingredients Tweek have in his cabinets and pantries in a large bowl. Putting the pan on the stove in low heat, he drizzles the pan in oil. As he pours the batter into the scorching pan, he fills them with Nutella and let them cook. He flips them after seeing the pancakes bubble with a spatula. Once the pancakes are done, he assembles them in a simple plate. He garnishes them in slices of strawberries and banana and whipped cream.

As he takes out two slices of bread and put them in a toaster, he moves on to the eggs and ham where he beats four eggs, chunks of butter, shredded cheese, and a splash of almond milk. Adding some butter on a hot pan, he put the egg mixture in a pan and stir it. Getting the eggs to become creamy, fluffy, velvety, and moist, he seasons the eggs in some shredded cheese, salt, and pepper.

He grabs the two slices of bread which pop up from the toaster. He spread butter on both toasts and place them on another plate along with the scrambled eggs next to them. He opens the can of spam to cut the spam into slices; lay them on the pan. He watches them sizzling to let out the aroma of pork and its grease and pigmented into a golden-brown color to take them out to the plate of buttered toasts and scrambled eggs. Lastly, he squeezes out orange to make orange juice in a cup.

Craig's point of view

Looking at what I made for Tweek, I'm sure Tweek is going to love them. I'm not Gordon Ramsay, but at least I don't suck at cooking like Stan's dad. I remembered Stan's dad used to work as a chef for my school cafeteria. He and the other chefs kept me and my friends and classmates starved in the cafeteria because of some fucking cooking competition on TV.

~ Flashback starts~

"Alright now, for my baked ziti, we are gonna start off by getting some extra-virgin olive oil into the pan. Oh yeah, get that all over there. It's all slick. ...It's all wet and slick. Oh..." I look at Stan's dad who is pouring extra-virgin olive oil into the pan to make his 'baked ziti' even though I just want some fucking food.

"Can we have some food, please?" I tried to tell him. But of course, he is too fucking busy with his 'baked ziti' for his 'cooking show', 'Cafeteria Fraîche'.

"Now olive oil does have a low smoke point, so keep that heat low, and keep it fraîche."

~ Flashback ends ~

His cooking sucks and he thoughts he will be a famous chef on TV, but he is really delusional. Man, Stan's dad is really delusional and batshit crazy. Hmm... it is no wonder why I can't stand Stan. How the fuck Stan puts up with him? Then again, my dad is equally insane; so does everybody's parents. I guess it's just South Park. Full of batshit surprises, adventures, and bullshits.

I take the tray of breakfasts upstairs and to Tweek's room. Tweek is still asleep soundly. Checking up on him to put the tray beside him, I put my hand on him. Fuck, he must be freezing to death like a popsicle! I unzip my jacket to wrap it around Tweek for warmth. There, much better. I check my phone to it is 6:29 am. I have to get home before Tricia! I'll be damned if Tricia or Red are going to be fucking pissed at me for getting near Tweek! Grabbing my backpack, I whisper him in his ear 'I love you' before kissing him on the lips and exiting out of his room and house to go home.

Tweek's point of view

I wake up to the smell of pancakes, eggs, and spams that I get up to see a tray of stacks of pancakes, scrambled eggs, slices of spams, and toast with butter. I'm sure it is not my parents since all they made for breakfast is mainly coffee; lefts me with Craig because he did take me home all of a sudden from yesterday. Oh yeah, I forgot that I have his jacket. He must've left it there.

Since Craig, the guy who always flips people off, prefers boring things, Stripes, and space, and his favorite color is blue, did something as cheesy as fuck to make a romantic breakfast-in-bed for me?! Even though I broke up with him, I still feel something weird inside me. Are my feelings for him still there? Do I love him despite the fact he broke my heart into pieces and brushed me off, so I have to deal with what guys did to me to scare me? Especially that jerk from outside of the market! Because of what they did to me really freak me out, do I trust men?

The snarling coming from my stomach interrupts my thoughts. I guess I can eat what Craig made. Picking up a fork next to the plate, I dig into the pancakes and take a bite of it. Wow, the pancakes taste delicious! Again, I stab deep into the eggs, spam, and the buttered toast; it is so good that I gobble the rest of them all up. I even wolf them down in fresh-squeezed orange juice. This is better than Stan's dad cooking back there. Oh yeah, Stan's dad is something... I remembered him yelling at the baseball game and fighting with the other dads of the opposite teams to got himself in jail. I can't wash away the images of him being half-naked to start a fight.

~ Flashback starts ~

"What'd you say?!"

"You heard me, asshole!"

"You want me to kick your ass right here?!"

"You want a piece of me?! 'Cause I'm pretty sick of your Goddamned mouth!"

"You'd better shut up, asshole!"

"I'm standin' right here! How do you wanna handle it?"

"I told you to SHUT UP!"

"Fort Collins can't play!"

"Why don't you shut your mouth before I kick your ass!"

"Come on, let's go! I'm right here!"

"Sit down before you get hurt!"

"Oh, I'm sorry! Why don'tcha get 'im on chars in America, I'm sorry!"

"Goddamnit Brian, swing!"

"Greeley sucks! Greeley sucks!"

"What, is this a Communist country or something?! I thought this was America!"

"¡Vamonos Pueblo! ¡Viva la Pueblo!"

"¡Pueblo, no bueno! ¡Pueblo es muy mal!"

"This is America! This is an honest America!"

~ Flashback ends ~

Wow, Stan's dad did pissed the dads from the other teams off back then. Although it is mortifying, I find it so funny as fuck to laugh out loud! Giggling like a little girl and snorting like a pig on a farm! Stan's dad may be bat-shit crazy and offensive like the one when he said the n-word. If it wasn't for Stan's dad, then me and my friends would've played long days or seasons of boring ass baseball.

After I'm finished with my breakfast made by Craig, I go downstairs to wash the plates in the sink and return back to my room. Oh shit, I forgot about the assignment for Ms. Wilde's class! The last time I tried to come up with this assignment, I ended up crying because of these 'thoughts'! I pull out a piece of paper and a pencil from my backpack and start working on it. This time, I need to beat them all at my game! Cartman, Craig, the Buddha boxes, men, and the guy who sexually assaulted me outside of the market!

~ 3 or 4 ½ hours later ~

I manage to write what I can think and feel into my poem following shit tons of crumbled-up paper balls. This poem I wrote is deeply personal to me and only me. Then again, I can give it to the person I know to read. The only person who understands me the most when 'someone' left me in tears. David

Bittersweet Ignorance

Sitting on my bed,

Tears stain on tissues,

Indulge in ice cream

Creamy and rich like the good times we had

Frigid like the room we're in

Or your voice when we have conversations

Specks of fires fade to coal

I guess it is time to say farewell

To him,

He whom I loved and lost

He who protected and forsaken me

He who cherished and martyred me

Without a knife to my back

What a way to throw

The love of his life, his everything

The love we had

Away for something superficial

I should've been warned

About them and men like you

Playing around my heart and mind

I pause for a second to tighten my grip on my pencil. I cross out everything I wrote on the paper.

Ugh! What's with these feelings?! I was in love with Craig fucking Tucker! My ex of all people! First, I fucking love him and the next, I-I … Ugh! This is why love is fucking complicated! This is why men are fucking complicated that I can't trust them! Men and love are blowing hot and cold on everything! To add lemon to the wounds is fucking Cartman and his bullshits! Why?! Why?! Why?!

My face is heating and tensing up, yet I feel a sense of self-destruction to collapse and cry on my bed. My bed muffles the sound of my 'ugly cries'. Why this one boy I fell love with has to break my heart into piece?! Why does every guy I come across have the audacity to flirt with me even if I'm not in a mood to be in the dating game?! Craig, Kenny, and the guy who disgustingly kissed and groped me outside of the market! I want to be alone in my room and nothing else. Like yesterday, I did pass out for an hour or so.

No one's point of view

~ 2 or 3 hours later ~

He gains consciousness from his passing out. He takes out his phone to check the time. It is 1:15 pm. He put his hand on his forearm in agony.

"Ow! Headache!" he grumbled to himself, "I need a break. It is getting boring in my room after all. Let's go outside to work out. I forgot that next Friday is the football game and I need to practice my cheer."

He gets up to his closet to pick out something to wear which are light mauve and white leggings with pockets, periwinkle purple top, white mesh crop top, grey sneakers, and white socks. He puts on a pink workout headband.

"Hmm... I need to go to another gym after what happened," He opens his laptop to type down 'gym near me' on Google Map. Entering the keywords, he sees several as he clicks on the 'zoom in' button. While he narrows out gyms that would take him hours to walk, his eyes light up at what he finds.

"Bingo!" Closing his laptop, he grabs his phone and earbuds; race downstairs. He inhales in the refreshing air as he opens the door.

"Oh yeah. Let's do it!" he plugs his earbuds to his phone and put on some music to begin his journey to the new gym. Beyonce's song, Single Ladies, is blasting in his ears, "Hell yeah! I love me some Beyoncé!"

~ Time skips to the new gym~

"Wow, this place is amazing!" he can't believe the new gym. He opens his mouth to sing a 'Hallelujah'. The place looks both industrial and modern in splashes of colors such as oranges, beiges, teals, and light greens. Huge windows. Vending machines. Wooden inspirational signs. LED lights. A massive jug of ice-cold water. There are even white towels on box shelves.

Tweek's point of view

To both my relief and nerves, there are so many girls in this gym. So, I don't have to be freaked out by a bunch of perverted creepos. Yet, I feel a pit of uncomfortableness.

'Gah! I'm the only boy in this gym! What if all of the girls are going to make fun of me?! Oh god, they'll be going to be meaner than the Raisin girls! Ngh, I don't want to go back to that horrible place! All of these guys are worse than the underpant gnomes or Steven Spielberg, George Lucas, and Francis Ford Coppola! Oh wait, I forgot that the fat weasel dragged me in this mess!

"Hello there. Come in to sign up. Don't be shy," I perk up to see a slender woman in the front desk. She has platinum hair, tan skin, and pearly white teeth when she smiles at me. Her smile is naturally genuine; not too fake like the ones in movies and TV shows where they have these plastic, beautiful girls or the Raisin girls.

I take a pen and put my name on a sheet of paper clamped to a clipboard, "Thank you."

"Anytime." At least she's really nice. Not like them and the Raisin girls who are snakes in the grass. She didn't judge me for wearing girly clothes since I'm a boy. Hey, this is 21st century, so to all the haters, suck it!

"Let's do this!"

No one's point of view

He prepares warm-ups and stretches. Next, he goes on the cardio machine and exercise bike for speed (as a cheerleader, he needs to be as fast as lightning) while drowning himself in pop, R&B, and hip-hop music. Then, he practices the tumbles, flips, cartwheels, and various acro moves on the gymnastics mat in another room of the gym; he did it with the equipment he sets up.

"Time to slay the choreography! I'm a badass bitch and I'm going to give it 'badass bitch'!" he turns on the music and gets into formation (no puns intended).

~ Cue the music (Song #1: Kill This Love by Blackpink)

"5, 6, 7, 8!" he busts the moves to the music. He starts off simple and clean, yet exudes energy and power. Once he gets to the rapping part, he dances confidently and aggressively like he owns this room and nobody ever! His facial expression is as ferocious as a lion or barbarian. Actually, he is thinking of beating the shit out of Cartman, Craig, and the people with Buddha Box.

Here I come kicking the door, uh

가장 독한 걸로 줘, uh
뻔하디 뻔한 그 love
더 내놔봐 give me some more
알아서 매달려 벼랑 끝에
한마디면 또 like 헤벌레 해
그 따뜻한 떨림이 새빨간 설렘이
마치 heaven 같겠지만
You might not get in it

Throughout the song, he is able to bring both grace, energy, and personality into his dancing. The grace of a lyrical/contemporary dancer; the energy and personality of a hip-hop dancer.

We must kill this love (Yeah! Yeah!)
Yeah, it's sad but true
Gotta kill this love (Yeah! Yeah!)
Before it kills you too
Kill this love (Yeah! Yeah!)
Yeah, it's sad but true
Gotta kill this love (Yeah! Yeah!)
Gotta kill, let's kill this love!

He did a turn and a pose which is a punch in the air with his right arm and the left on his hips at the end of the music.

"Last one is the cheer chant," he put away the equipment.

"Ready?! Okay! 5, 6, 7, 8! We're cute! We're sweet! We're proud! We're going to beat the game! We're going to rule this game! We're gonna shoot the scores to victory! Go Cows!"

"Thank You, Next! Thank You, Next! Thank You, Next! We're so grateful for our team! Thank You, Next! Thank You, Next! Thank You, Next! We're so thankful for our team!" he did a punch in the air and dip low to stuck his ass out flirtatiously.

"Let's go South Park, let's go! Come on, South Park! Fight, fight, fight! You got so much fight! You got so much spirit! Even if you lose, you can do it! Go South Park!" he winks and blows a kiss at the end.

"Come on, Cows! Come on, Cows! Knock them down and score some points! You can do it, I know you can! Go Cows! Go Cows! Go, go go... Go Cows!" he twirls around to shake his ass and did a backflip split.

Tweek's point of view

Catching my breath and drinking water from the glass jug of ice-cold water and a 'detox juice' from the vending machine, I check my phone to see it is almost 6 pm. My stomach is gnarring like crazy! I guess I didn't eat anything since I passed out for two or three hours.

I paid her at the front desk and wave her goodbye. She smiles and thanks me for coming to this gym, "Have a good day!"

"You too," I tell her as I leave out the door. Walking on the street, I survey the area for a place to grab a bite. I can sense my mouth is watering for something I can sink my teeth in. It's not until I come across a small restaurant where I have waffle fries and fried shrimps, buffalo chicken pizza with tomatoes and extra garlic, fish sub with coleslaw and spicy mayo, pasta primavera, and mixed berry cake. Enjoying my meal, I shockingly notice the same guy from the market. The same black mohawk. The same tattoos on his left arm. The same black T-shirt, denim sagging pants, Jordan shoes, black leather jacket, and chains. The same guy who kissed and groped me. I can't let him see me! I have to get away from him! I need to eat as soon as possible! But hey, at least he wouldn't kiss me since I have foods loaded with garlic, fish, and anything that gives me bad breath.

I hastily gobbling all of my foods and ask the waiter to give me the bill to pay for my meals, "Check please, sir!" I smash my money into the bill for him; I lay a five-dollar-bill tip on the table.

I look to see he's too busy with his business or something, so I take this as a chance to escape. Pronto! I get up to walk around to reach for the door. I turn my eyes back at him and I regret looking back at him because now he's about to cast his eyes at me!

'Holy shit! Tweek, run!' I say to myself to bolt the fuck out of here! Oh my god! Oh my god! Why do I have to run into him out of all people?! What's fucking worst are the people in the restaurant with their fucking Buddha boxes! I'm sprinting for my own life thanks to them, Cartman, and Craig! Fuck them! Fuck them! Fuck them!

Out of a sudden, I feel a hand covering my mouth and the other hand on my hips. Oh my god, not him! I try to break myself free by shaking him off or using my hands to pull myself away from him. Didn't work because he's too strong. I try to sink my teeth in his hand; he curses to let out 'Bitch!' and punch me in the face.

"You look even sexy in your workout clothes. Especially that pant of yours. Do you miss me, tight ass?!" his fingers gripping on my ass and his lips on my neck. Again, he reeks like alcohol and cigarettes! I feel something's huge and pointy poking at my ass. From behind, he bends down to kiss me on the cheek. Fucking pervert! I'm done being the sex toy to anyone else! I'm not owned by someone else!

"Fuck you, jackass!" I elbowed his face from me, "Get off of me! I say no! I don't want you! I fucking mean it!"

What he's going to do with me?! I have to fight back for my life! For the second time, I bite his hand and push him away from me to burst away from him. Additionally, I jab him in the face.

"Oh no, you don't!" He grabs me by the neck and both of my wrists. His fist impact my eye, "I'm taking you somewhere else! I'm teaching you prick a lesson for turning me down!"

He carries me to his car and drives me to a secluded, woody place. He gets out of the car and picks me up to go deep into the area. I was being positioned on the ground. As I'm defending me from him and smack him in his face, he nails me in my nose that blood is running down my face.

"Pull that shit again and you'll regret it!" He pins me tightly on the ground and roughly kisses me. Ew, alcohol and cigarettes! I battle my resistance to moan, but of course, he thrashes my jaw and squeezes his hands on my wrists. Jesus, it's just like in my nightmare! "Kiss me! Moan like a slut, you bitch!"

His tongue travels in my mouth and I foolishly release a moan much to his pleasure. While kissing me, he tears open my shirts. Without my shirts, I shiver from the cold air. His lips pull back from mine to go towards my neck, shoulders, and stomach. Until he reaches to my lower half. Oh god!

"You're even sexier without clothes on," He pulls down my leggings for the impossible! He snickers and whispers in my ear, "There, there baby boy. I am going to show you experience. I want my dick ramming in your ass and g-spot so hard. You'll be screaming out loud in this night."

I see him taking off his shirt and belt. He begins to unbutton and unzip his pant to reveal his boxer and his monstrous bulge. Damn. Damn.

"Time to bang you until I make you cum," he maliciously smiles at me. My tears trickle to prepare for the agonizing moment. Men scare the shit out of me!

 

Chapter Text

Chapter 12: Bruises, Tears, and Scars

Tweek's point of view

Beep... Beep... Beep...

I hear the sound of a machine next to me. I slowly open my eyes to the sound of chemicals. I can see myself, wearing a gown, in a hospital bed. I groan as I steadily rose from the bed. My body hurts like hell from what happened last night. Especially my ass and who knows what's down there. Overall, I feel like shit as fuck. From the pain on my lower part, I feel... soiled. Soiled of my dignity. Soiled of my innocence. Soiled of myself. Who am I? Who am I?

Also, how do I end up here in this hospital? The last time I can think of... I remember hearing voices. Voices of the awful guy. That same awful guy who groped and kissed outside of the market. I can't stand how he makes me feel... vulnerable. I can't stand how he talks to me that I attempt to suppress his comments. I can't stand how he lay his hands on me like I am a punching bag to him. I can't stand how he pounds me hard to make my toes curl up.

In...Out... In... Out... In...Out... In...Out... In...Out... In...Out... I count how many times he fucked me until I lose track of the numbers. This is the first time I lose my... you know what. The first dick inserted in me. However, this is different. Instead of love and passion, it is pain. It is against my consent. When I try to say no to that guy, he just pushes me over the edge.

~ Flashback starts ~

"Tight ass."

"Kiss me! Moan like a slut, you bitch!"

"You're even sexier without clothes on."

"There, there baby boy. I am going to show you experience. I want my dick ramming in your ass and g-spot so hard. You'll be screaming out loud in this night."

~ Flashback ends ~

I am at the brink of breaking down in tears. Am I a slut? Am I? Does 'having sex with an older man' makes me a slut? Does 'having every guy flirting at me' makes me a slut? Is it my fault for it? I should have done something else. I should have screamed louder or something. If it wasn't for last night, then I wouldn't end up here.

The door opens to see a woman in her nursing attire. She is around her twenties or something. She looks around Token's nationality with her black hair and dark brown skin. Her name tag reads 'Gillian Woods.' Quickly wiping my tears to hide away the pain, she comes at me.

"Tweek, I'm glad you're awake. You're at the hospital. I see that by your diagnosis, you're brutally assaulted and in a coma for what seems to be 3 hours or so," she takes out his phone to see it is 12 am. So that's how long I've been unconscious. But who took me there?

"On the other hand, we run some test on you and well," she breaks the news to make my heart drop, "We find out that you're sexually assaulted."

My mouth feels as dry as a desert at the word. The word 'sexual assault' hits me at a home-run. Sexually assaulted? Sexually assaulted?! What would people think of me being 'sexually assaulted'? I can picture the looks on everybody's faces including my friends, Craig, and fucking Cartman. They'll think that I am some slut, whore, or that 'person' soliciting sex on the street. They'll think that I am 'asking for it.' I can assume that they don't understand 'sexual assault' or something. Especially I am a boy and homosexual.

"Sexually assaulted?" I blurted out to the nurse. My stomach is twisting and churning that I want to vomit. My mind springs back to what happened last night. Episodes of panic attacks. Patterns of men patronizing with their disgusting comments and sexual advances. The noises I lament to listen to; still there in my mind. Why aren't they going away?! I want to shout at them to leave me alone.

~ Flashback starts ~

"Tight ass, sweetheart."

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this sweet juicy ass!"

"I want to grind and bang that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

"Hey baby, you're looking fine today."
"Damn, I'm liking this view of you!"

"Just wanna ram you in bed until you moan!"

Just let me rock

fuck you back to sleep girl

don't say a word no

girl don't you speak

"Ow, ow, baby got back!"
"Bang bang, baby!"
"Look at that peachy ass!"

"Nice legs, pretty boy!"
"Woah, you have a nice ass, cutie!"

"Nice ass, fag," the voice of that guy. That guy groped, kissed, and violated me, "You're so cute acting all feisty and shit. I love it when you're playing hard to get, kitten."
I recalled vivid images of how my pant is being pulled down at the night of the 'incident'. How he seizes my wrists with his big hands. How he grabbed me by the neck when I tried to get away from him. How he hit me in my face.

~ Flashback ends ~

"Hello? Are you okay? What's wrong?" the nurse shook me on the shoulder, "Is something you want to tell me? Talk to me."

I turn to face her before collapsing myself to bawl my eyes out. I can't take this anymore. Stress. Pain. Heartbreak. Anxiety and Fear. Everything I have to carry through the days and weeks. I am broken and nobody is here to fix it. It is because I had been suppressing them to deal with them on my own. Except I only told one person who completely understands me.

"I... I..." I struggle on the words.

"Take your time, dear. Tell me what's going on," the nurse hugs me and rubs my back in small circles. The same motion as what Heidi did when I broke up with Craig, "Deep breaths, dear. Deep breaths."

I did as she told me to do. Breathe in, breathe out. As I am calming myself down, I hold my head as my mind is bombarding with demons, questions, revolting images, and doubts. Should I tell her? Yes or no? I'm not sure if there are some ways to fix this. Is there are hope for what I've been through on my own and keeping secrets from them? The demons, questions, revolting images, and doubts are suffocating me!

I take one last deep breath and explain to her the truth. The truth about the guy, older than me, who fucked me last night. The same guy who groped and kissed me outside of the market.

"That's not the only case I have to deal with," I added, facing the nurse, "I remember uncomfortable comments and touches from men, so that's why I've been crying in my room, passing out, and other things. I begin to question myself in this situation. I am not sure if I can trust men. I am not sure if there are people I can reach out to. I am not sure if I can go outside without having a full-blown panic attack or something."

"I am so sorry you have to endure the pain, stress, and everything else. He did this to you, so it is not your fault. I get where this is coming from and you don't have to go through with it alone. I am going to tell you a story," the nurse wipes all of my tears with her thumbs, "There is this one girl who dreamed of being a police officer in her life. But that dream is shattered because of the trials and tribulations. Her father is an abusive alcoholic, her mother went out to clubbing and cheats on him with other guys, and as for her brothers and sisters, she has to take care of them every day and night. Not only that but because of the sexual assault she faced at age fourteen; her friends and community turned against her. Her parents disowned her to the point where she has to live in a homeless shelter or on the street. Without her friends, parental figures, or anyone else she can come for support, she went through depression and battles of self-harm, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts.'

I can't think of this girl's story. I guess she had it harder than me and I can relate to the pain I had been through as her. The anxiety. The pain. The concept of sexual assault. Without anyone by my side. What makes me grimace is how they become assholes to her because of sexual assault, "Tell me more."

"She's about to commit suicide by hanging herself when she can't handle life anymore. Nevertheless, it's not until she was taken to this hospital by an unexpected savior. This savior saved her from dark times. If wasn't for this savior, then she wouldn't have the choice to turn things around. She begins to focus on her education for a high school diploma and a bachelor degree in nursing. She takes her siblings from her parent's house to live with her grandmother. Her grandmother turns out to be the better parental figure than her parents to take care of her and her siblings," she narrative this girl's story, "You know, the girl in this story is right in front of you."

"You? You went through everything in your life?" I ask her, "Why? How?"

"Exactly," Her dark brown eyes tear up as she looks at me in my eyes, "Tweek, my dear, I know you and I both have pain and sufferings like human beings. I'm telling you right now to never go down that path as I did as a young girl. What's upsets me is how people didn't have the balls to lend me a hand. I did everything what I can do for myself and my brothers and sisters. From now on, I'm helping you from that pain and suffering. Here are pamphlets on sexual assault. You can talk to someone you can trust like a teacher, counselor, or even your friends in order to overcome this ordeal."

She kindly hands me a bunch of pamphlets of sexual assault. That's a lot of information to learn about sexual assault.

"I have a question."

"Go on, what is it?"

I open my mouth to say, "Is it common for a male to encounter this situation? Especially as a homosexual?"

She smiles at me and says, "There are some males in this ordeal, but like females, they are living in fear of confronting it because of society's judgments, ignorance, and hate. You're lucky to have the courage to talk to me about your ordeal. A piece of advice I can give to you: Don't let him and other people's judgments get to you."

"Thank you," I praise her. Though, doubts are clouding in my head about this situation. Who can I talk to? How I can cope with it? How can I recover? What would people think of me? Will I give up everything because of it? There is one question: Who took me to the hospital? Hmm...

No one's point of view

After Tweek is being discharged from the hospital, he is about to walk home. However, he turns around to the sound of a car honking. He expects some cat callers or creeps for the worst. However, the driver is no other than Skeeter.

"Hey Tweek, you need a ride home?" he called in his Southern accent.

At first, he feels hesitant about it. It's unlike of Skeeter to offer him a ride home after long histories of bigotry and conservativeness. Before PC Principal comes to South Park.

Although he senses a hint of mistrust towards men after what happened, he has no other choice but to give in. His house is hours away from the hospital.

He opens the door and gets inside Skeeter's car. Skeeter turns on the ignition in his car and begins driving. It is awkwardly quiet in his car. Tweek is slouching on his seat with his hands on his chin and his eyes on the ground.

"So, are you okay?" Skeeter asks Tweek which he nods his head, his eyes still glued to the ground. He didn't feel like facing Skeeter to have a conversation with him.

"Are you sure? You look like you're beaten up by someone. I remember I saw you passed out on the ground with bruises on your face, so I took you to the hospital," he informed the blonde boy.

"Uh… yeah," he nonchalantly answers and nods his head again at him. He suspiciously observes him before shifting his focus on the road.

~ 15-25 minutes later ~

"Here you are," He brakes at the reddish-brown house and garage that is his house. Tweek looks up to see his house. Unbuckling his seatbelt, he gets up to open the car door.

"Thank you for the ride, sir," Tweek responds to him with a small, sad smile.

"No problem, buddy. Call me Skeeter."

Once he closes the car door, Tweek looks back at the car and turns at his house. He rushes inside his house to go upstairs to his room. He locks himself in his room to change into his lilac purple nightgown and crash down to his bed.

Tweek's point of view

On my bed, I stare at the ceiling. I'm in my own thoughts on what will happen tomorrow or so. What if people react negatively about my incident with that guy? What if they think of me as 'sexually-active,' 'that boy', 'frisky,' or 'whore'? Or a bad influence to others? Or worse? I can't face everybody to go through the shame and humiliation! At the same time, I will destruct myself if I keep my 'sexual assault' silent. But who can I turn to? I feel terrible for lying to Wendy and Skeeter. Then again, David didn't treat me differently when I opened up to him about it. What about them? Token? Jimmy? Stan? Kyle? Heidi? Bebe? I don't feel like going to school and rather stay home.

Because of that incident, I am left hurting inside to drench myself in tears. Oh wait, I forgot about the creative writing assignment for Ms. Wilde's class. I pull out a piece of paper and a pencil to begin scribbling words. Maybe I can come to terms with my 'sexual assault' in the form of a poem.

~ 1 or 3 hours later ~

Done!

I look at my work. A piece of paper with everything I write from my heart. My pain. My feelings. Everything I'd suppressed from everyone else. It's been hours of writing and starting over that I have nothing to do in my room. I notice a blue jacket next to me. A blue jacket… Craig.

I forgot about Craig. After my breakup with Craig and the horrible incident with that guy who groped and kissed me outside of the market, can I trust men? Can I have a relationship after the 'thing'? What if I still have these things in my mind even in a relationship? Can I get back together with Craig? I mean he did take me home after the panic attack episode at the library and he did make me a romantic breakfast. On the other hand, ugh... I shake my head to think about him. What is the point of this? I can't deal with everything! It is all Cartman's fault for fucking everything! Every time he does is fucking everything up with his bullshits! He's full of shitty excuses! He never ever learns something from his bullshits and everything he fucked up! He just fucks things up and expects everybody else cleans up his own fucking messes! Ugh!

No one's point of view

Tweek gets up to go to the bathroom. Standing next to the bathroom sink and mirror, he opens the cabinet above the sink and mirror to find a box of razor blades. He tears open the box to take out a razor blade and put it back on the cabinet.

Staring at the razor blade, he presses and runs the blade on his arms. One, two, three…. He winces at the stinging sensation from the slicing of the sharp blade on his arms. Blood is running from the scars on his arms which is about a dozen or fourteen. It hurts, but he sighs in relieve as if he drains the pain and suffering out of him.

'I should not be doing this, but what choice do I have? People care about the fucking Buddha box more than anything and anyone else in the world. Including me,' he said to himself, 'What is the point of this? It is too much pressure! Sexual assault. Stress. The pain. Doubts. Heartbreak. Panic Attacks. Horrible images and voices in my head.'

He grabs a towel to staunch the bleeding on his arms. Once the bleeding stops, he goes back to the bathroom cabinet to get a first-aid kit. He wraps the wounds in sterile bandages. He returns to his room and locks the door; close the window curtain to shield the lights away.

Tweek's point of view

I get into bed to lay down. I push the blue jacket away from me as if I rather freeze to death than being warm up by him. It's just too much for me to bear. I close my eyes and sleep through the day; I let tears from my eyes to soak on my face and pillow.

Chapter Text

Chapter 13: Breakdown

No one's point of view

After Tweek's discovery about sexual assault, Tweek begins to deteriorate time after time. He starts to eat less and mostly spend his times in his room. He would either watch R-rated movies, listens to music, or continue to cut himself. He even sleeps through days and nights drowning himself in tears. Whenever his friends call him about plans to hang out, he would decline them by saying that he's busy. He didn't bother to respond to text messages or phone calls. Though he goes outside; he becomes paranoid and never at ease; he did his best to control himself from self-destruction.

Picking out outfits and makeups become an uphill battle for him with the voices in his mind dictating him what to wear and what not to wear.

'Ugh, why are they shitting on me?! Why can't they just leave me alone?! Don't they have something else to do rather than calling me out?!' he endeavors to resist them.

'Slut'

'Trashy'

'Promiscuous'

'Ew, Too much makeup!'

'Asking for it!'

'Whore'

'Begging for attention!'

'Bitch!'

Additionally, he didn't want his scars and bruises to be seen by people including his friends. Eventually, he ends up being covered up in dark colors, abundant of layers, and clothes with edgier aesthetics. Not to mention wearing punk accessories and caked in heavy makeups to look like one of those middle or high school girls.

In school, he tries to concentrate on his studies. At recess and lunch, he would be in the library reading a book or the pamphlets the nurse gave him or the music room with the piano rather than with his friends. He also did his homework in the library he was assigned and missing; turns in his missing works.

"Ew, Tweek looks like a faggot-ass whore/gothy and emo freakshow!" he turns around to see Cartman. The guy who is at fault for fucking everybody's lives. The guy who ruins his relationship with Craig. The guy who never learn from his mistakes and gets away with it. The guy who only and always care about himself and no one else, "Shouldn't you be with these ugly bitches? That Mexican boy? That fucking Jew? Your boyfriend, Craig? Or are you whoring around with a bunch of dicks?!"

Nice job, Cartman! Thanks to him, Tweek wasn't having it! His body begins to heat up from zero to hundreds or thousands of degrees. Veins are throbbing on his head. His blood is boiling and his heart is beating rapidly like a boxer taking blows at the punching bag.

"Shut the fucking hell up, fat weasel! Don't talk about my friends like that! Don't even think about bringing him up! Like you have the nerves to say something to my friends! Do you have something to say, huh?! If you do, then say it my face! How fucking dare you?!" he explodes at him. He is never the person to lose his temper, but he had enough of Cartman. He had enough of his bullshits. He had enough of him bashing on his friends. He had enough of him treating Heidi like shit. He had enough of people taking his side for the heck of it.

'Oh, I'm not done with him!' he shouted to himself, 'I want to teach him a lesson!'

"Oh, you think you're cool and shit and all?! Do people like an asshole like you?! Do people even put up with an asshole like you?! Not me because to tell you the truth, you suck! You suck worse than your fucking Buddha boxes and your little followers! I remember how you got your ass handed to you by a girl because of your bullshits!" he chews his fat classmate out, "For so long, I had been hearing you go on and on about your bullshits! For so long, I had seen you fuck everything up! Do you think you expect to have everybody clean your messes up?! Do you even think you can get away with your bullshits with you being fake-ass as fuck?! Hell no, you're nothing but an unforgiving, ignorant, fake, egotistical, manipulative, lazy-ass, unaccountable, and malicious jackass to call yourself a person or friend to anybody else! Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Butters, David, Craig, Clyde, Token, Jimmy, Heidi, Wendy, Bebe, Nichole, and anyone else! You're a liar and you know that!'

"You little motherfucker!" Cartman raise his hand at Tweek for the worst.

Slap!

"You better shut the fuck up! My ears hurt from your little bitching mouth!" he barks at him.

"Oh, make me! Or is it because you're a damn dickrag! All barks and no bites! At least you got more bites considering all of the junk foods you consume! In fact, fuck you!" he flips him off before walking away from him.

He could care less about the hand print on his cheek or who knows what Cartman might do to him. All what matters is that he finally stands up for himself! Without Craig or anyone else by his side. He never expects Cartman to slap him in the face. But he wears a victorious smile on his face.

'I hope that karma got Cartman real bad after years of his bullshits and I mean it!' he wishes to himself.

~ Time skips (after school) ~

Tweek's point of view

I stay after school to be with the piano. Music is the only way to escape from everything. The sexual assault. The Buddha boxes. Craig. Cartman. Geez, I still never forget that he slaps me after my rant to him. Well, other than dancing and cheerleading which I feel like I need to quit cheerleading because of 'it.' What would they think of me? A cheerleader who's raped by an older guy? Or whoring around with an older guy? I open my mouth to sing what I'm feeling about the sexual assault and everything that cause me pain and tears.

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did, I did
And you were strong and I was not
My illusion, my mistake
I was careless, I forgot
I did
And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won
You can go ahead tell them
Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the skyline
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know
Thinking all you need is there
Building faith on love and words
Empty promises will wear
I know (I know)
And now when all is gone
There is nothing to say
And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahead tell them
Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the skyline
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)
I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did
Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof top
Write it on the skyline
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy (I was happy)
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did

I slump down on the piano, covering my face with my hands. I can feel myself being caged and surrounded by rains, lightning, and dark grey clouds. My mind is bombarded with these thoughts, images, voices, and doubts. I am done with everything these days. I can't eat and do anything in my life these days. I guess there is no hope for me. I don't see what's the point of living in this world where bad things happen to me and I have to cope with them on my own.

A hand is planted on my back to shake me up. I look up to see my teacher, Ms. Wilde. She opens to her mouth, "Hi Tweek, I see you're here and I got to say that you're amazing at music. I remember the good times joining glee club back in high school."

"Thanks," I reply to her.

"How are you feeling?" she asks me a question.

"I'm okay, I guess," I answered.

"I notice you have been quiet and distant today," she scratches her head, "When I review your poem, your poem is very dark and exudes sentimentality, yet well-written. Is there something's going on? Tell me something. I can help you in any ways."

My mind is playing a game of tug of war. Should I tell her? I can't lie to her like I lied to Wendy or Skeeter. I will be a terrible person for being dishonest to her and them about my 'sexual assault' with the guy who groped and kissed me outside of the market! Heck, I'm a terrible person for putting on a fake smile to say that 'I'm okay!' Realistically, I'm not okay! I'm drowning! I'm hurting! I'm suffocating like the walls coming up at me! Oh my god, they're back!

~ Flashback starts ~

"Tight ass."

"Kiss me! Moan like a slut, you bitch!"

"You're even sexier without clothes on."

"There, there baby boy. I am going to show you experience. I want my dick ramming in your ass and g-spot so hard. You'll be screaming out loud in this night."

"Check it out on the blonde cutie, bro!"

"Damn bro, he got this sweet juicy ass!"

"I want to grind and bang that peach of his!"

"I want to ride him until I make him moan and scream louder!"

"Hey baby, you're looking fine today."
"Damn, I'm liking this view of you!"

"Just wanna ram you in bed until you moan!"

"Ow, ow, baby got back!"
"Bang bang, baby!"
"Look at that peachy ass!"

"Nice legs, pretty boy!"
"Woah, you have a nice ass, cutie!"

"Nice ass, fag."

"You're so cute acting all feisty and shit. I love it when you're playing hard to get, kitten."

The images of my pant being pulled by this guy. His big hands grasping on my wrists and neck. His fists taking jabs at my face. His lips, reeked of cigarettes and alcohol, are on my lips! How he fucking touched me! How he inserted something in me to feel the pain all over my body!

In...Out... In... Out... In...Out... In...Out... In...Out... In...Out...

~ Flashback ends ~

"Tweek? Tweek..." These feelings and haunting flashbacks prove too much for me to hold on! Why are they here?! Are they here to torment me?! I fall to the ground to let out a sob. I can't take this anymore! It's a bitter pill to swallow as if there is no way to repress them that long!

"Everything is not going to and never will be fine! I broke up with Craig and I thought I turn out better without him! But no! No! No!" I come clean to her, "I had been dealing with men checking on me to make me feel uncomfortable with their disgusting comments and gestures! I encountered this one older guy outside of the market who groped and kissed me outside of the market! He also did the horrible thing to me last night: he fucking raped me! This is my fault for this and I hate myself for this!'

"Tweek..."

"No, I want to be alone and deal with it on my own! I can't face him and them! What would they think of me?! Who can I trust?! Will I trust men?! Can I trust them?!" I roll my sleeves up to show her the scars I made in the bathroom, "I did this to myself since..."

"Tweek, listen to me," she motions me to look at her, "This is not your fault for this, so don't blame yourself. He did this to you and you don't have to deal with this on your own. Don't hurt yourself because of what he did. It is never too late to ask for help."

"How? There is nobody I can turn to other than the nurse who healed me and my friend, David! I... I... I can't take it anymore. I'm planning on quit the cheer team!"

"Tweek, no! You can't quit the cheer team because of what he did. What I'm proud of is that you did tell someone you can trust. On the other hand, what you did is unhealthy and you need help right now. I promise you that you're not alone," she hugs and comforts me.

I let it all out in Ms. Wilde's embrace. The pain and suffering I'd had been bearing every day and night. The bruises and scars I've been shielding from them. These flashbacks I try to conquer. I always thought that nobody cares about me at all. But I'm wrong. My dark times are over. The storms I'm in are over. The weights are being lifted. I am breaking free! I am the person I lost and finally find!

"You're not alone," she repeats to me.

I'm not alone.

Author's note: Another reference to South Park's episode, 'Beast Cancer Show Ever' and a hint on Kitty Wilde's past on molestation from the tv show's Glee.