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Sanders Sides One Shots

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Thomas tore his eyes away from his reflection in the mirror to glance down at the pill bottle in his hand. His anxiety had been extremely heightened recently, and he wasn’t sure why. The medication was only a temporary thing and would hopefully get him through the stressful few months of video making he had ahead of him. Surely the medication wouldn’t affect Virgil, let alone harm him. Thomas shrugged before pouring out a single pill and swallowing it.
“Hello, hello, let me tell you what it’s like to be a zero, zero.”
Virgil sat up in his bedroom, sitting cross legged on his unmade bed. His purple comforter and blankets were littered across his bed and his purple pillow cases were stained black from years of eyeshadow stained tears. He had a window on the wall next to his bed, but it was always covered by deep blue spider curtains, not allowing any light into the anxious side’s room. Next to the door hung posters of a few of his favorite bands’ most iconic album covers. Welcome To The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance, Blurryface by Twenty One Pilots, Death Of A Bachelor by Panic At The Disco, and American Beauty/American Psycho by Fall Out Boy. His desk was against the wall across the room from his bed with his sick nasty Nightmare Before Christmas posters hanging over it. On his desk sat his laptop that had a sticker of his logo stuck to it, the black sweater and deep purple pajama pants he wore to bed were flung over his desk chair. Above his bed hung a cork board, that displayed his logo, a black tag that said anxiety, his card from Patton back from the accepting anxiety videos, and a photo of Logan, Roman, and Patton holding a sign that read “Happy birthday, Virgil!” in purple marker. On the wall next to his bed, he had a string of purple lights that had three photos clothespinned to them. The photo on the left was of him and Logan at Disneyland when Roman and Patton abandoned them, the photo on the right was a selfie Patton had taken with him, and the photo in the middle was of all four of them right after the accepting anxiety videos. On his black bedside table sat a picture frame that read “Patton’s Birthday In Disneyland” and the photo was of all four of them. Two hooks hung above the foot of the bed, the left hung his normal, patched purple jacket, and the right hung his old, black checkered jacket. Underneath the jackets were a pair of purple Converse and a pair of black Converse.
Virgil sat in his ripped, black skinny jeans and ripped, long sleeved, purple shirt. His black headphones were nestled on his head, blasting Imagine Dragons new album.
“Let me show you what it’s like to never feel, feel, like I’m good enough for anything that’s real, real, I’m looking for a way out,” Virgil sang along.
Virgil opened his mouth to sing the next lyrics when a sudden headache hit him. He cringed, ripping his headphones off of his ears.
“Ow,” Virgil mumbled, rubbing his temples as the headache pounded harder.
The anxious side responded to this headache by chugging down water and finding something on YouTube to watch while he tried to turn his focus to his fidget cube, hoping it would distract him from getting overly anxious about the headache. The headache didn’t go away.
It came back worse the next day. The logical response would be to tell the others, but Virgil had his reasons for refusing. One, he was anxious about it, and two, Virgil may have been a light side now, but some dark side tendencies still resided inside him. One of them being never admitting weakness. Virgil also wasn’t Logan, so why would he take the logical response?
Everyday Virgil gradually got worse. His headaches turned into nausea. He stopped being able to eat because he would throw up everything he ate. He stopped being able to sleep so the headaches, nausea, and now extreme hunger eating at his stomach was endless agony. It was only when he started coughing up blood, that Virgil realized he should probably say something.
“Hey guys,” Virgil called, trying to ignore the extreme dizziness he was feeling as he made his way downstairs to the kitchen.
Virgil entered the kitchen to see Logan sat at the dining table, reading yet another novel, while Patton and Roman were having a conversation.
“Guys,” Virgil repeated, leaning against the doorway.
“Yes Virgil?” Logan asked, looking up from his book.
“Everything alright, kiddo?” Patton asked.
“Not exactly,” Virgil answered.
“What’s wrong?” Roman asked.
Their conversation was cut short by the familiar tug of Thomas summoning them.
“Thomas needs us,” Logan commented. “Can this conversation wait, Virgil?”
“I guess,” Virgil mumbled.
They all appeared in their regular spots in Thomas’s living room. Virgil almost fell over before catching himself on the railings of the staircase.
“Whoa, you okay, Hot Topic?” Roman asked, concerned.
“I’m fine,” Virgil grimaced, lying.
“What’s up, Thomas?” Logan asked.
“Roman and I came up with a new video idea, and I wanted all of your opinions,” Thomas said.
“Thomas, that’s so sweet,” Patton cooed.
“It’s a great idea actually,” Roman bragged. It’s about-”
Roman’s sentence was cut short by a coughing fit coming from the staircase.
“Virgil, are you okay?” Logan asked.
“Can you guys get sick?” Thomas asked.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, we can,” Logan answered.
“Have you been feeling sick lately, Virge?” Roman asked.
“Yes,” Virgil snapped, once his coughing subsided, “that’s what I was coming to talk to you guys about before Thomas summoned us.”
“Sorry,” Thomas apologized.
“Don’t worry,” Virgil reassured. “It’s not your fault.”
“How have you been feeling, Virgil?” Logan asked.
“It started with a headache,” Virgil explained. “Then it turned into nausea. I feel dizzy right now. I haven’t eaten in days because I can’t keep anything down. I haven’t slept in days. My ribs hurt because I’ve been coughing so hard. And to top it all off, I’m now super anxious because I have no idea what’s wrong with me.”
“Wait,” Thomas started.
“Thomas?” Logan asked.
“How long has this been going on for?” Thomas asked.
“About a week,” Virgil answered.
“Oh no,” Thomas muttered.
“What is it?” Patton asked.
“I don’t know if this has anything to do with what’s been happening to Virgil, but this week I started taking anxiety medication,” Thomas explained.
“You did what?” Roman exclaimed as Patton gasped.
“I’ve been really stressed out recently and my anxiety’s seemed a little heightened,” Thomas mumbled.
“Thomas, that hurts me,” Virgil stated.
“I didn’t know,” Thomas defended.
“He’s right,” Logan reasoned. “There’s no way he could’ve known anxiety medication would hurt Virgil.”
“Well it kind of seems like common sense right?” Roman snapped.
Their conversation was cut off by yet another coughing fit from Virgil, this time blood came out onto Virgil’s hand.
“Can I get a towel?” the anxious side asked, holding up his hand.
“I got you, son,” Patton responded, summoning a paper towel roll and tossing it at Virgil. Virgil caught it, wiping the blood from his hand as Thomas grimaced.
“Can I see the bottle?” Virgil asked, clearing his throat.
“Yeah,” Thomas answered, walking over to the kitchen and grabbing the pill bottle before tossing it at Virgil, “here.”
Virgil caught the bottle and examined it. His purple eyes widened as he read the back.
“Oh God,” Virgil whispered.
“What?” Thomas asked.
“Thomas,” Virgil looked up from the bottle, “you’re killing me.”
“What?” Thomas repeated.
“Do you realize how strong of anxiety medication this is?” Virgil asked, holding up the bottle.
Thomas took in a shaky breath, shaking his head.
“Pretty fucking strong,” Virgil swore.
“Language,” Patton mumbled.
“This could kill me in about two weeks,” Virgil explained.
“Good thing it only takes a week for the withdrawal symptoms to wear off,” Thomas exclaimed. “I’ll stop taking them and you’ll be better in a week.”
Virgil nodded before saying, “I just don’t get why you need medication this strong. I’m not that bad, am I?”
“No,” Thomas answered quickly, “you’re not bad, Virgil.”
“Then why?” the anxious side asked.
Thomas stayed silent, trying to think of an answer but nothing came to mind.
“He doesn’t know,” Logan whispered.
“Something just felt off,” Thomas responded.
“I’d been feeling off before this week,” Virgil admitted. “Maybe I just became a little careless so your anxiety felt worse.”
“Why were you feeling off?” Patton asked.
“I was thinking too much,” Virgil replied, “remembering things I didn’t want to remember.”
They all stood in silence for a few seconds before Virgil lost his balance, catching himself on the railing.
“We need to get you into bed,” Patton said.
“I like that idea,” Logan said. “Thomas, it was nice chatting with you but Virgil needs some assistance.”
“You’ll stop the medication right?” Roman asked.
“Of course,” Thomas answered.
“Good,” Roman replied, sinking out.
“Come on, Virgil,” Patton said softly, also sinking out.
“I’m sorry, Virgil,” Thomas apologized.
“Don’t worry about it, Thomas,” Virgil choked, as him and Logan sunk out.
Once back in the mindscape, the other sides got Virgil into his pajamas and into bed.
“Everything’s going to be okay,” Patton reassured. “Thomas will stop taking the medication and you’ll be okay in a couple of days.”
Virgil nodded.
“And if you ever need anything, don’t be afraid to ask,” Logan informed.
“Thanks guys,” Virgil croaked.
“Anything,” Roman smiled.
Logan, Roman, and Patton left Virgil’s room but left the door open just in case. Just like Thomas said, he stopped taking the medication and in about a week the withdrawal symptoms faded away and Virgil gradually got better. But no matter what, Thomas will never be rid of the guilt of almost killing his anxiety.

Chapter Text

The memories kept flying past Virgil’s eyes, no matter how much he tried to push them back. A year. It’d been a year since it all ended. Yeah, Virgil was happier now that he was friends with Logan, Roman, and Patton, but that didn’t stop him from thinking about what he had with him. Before the others accepted Anxiety.

There were rooms in the mindscape that Logic, Princey, and Morality hardly visited. That’s where Virgil would reside. Those three never really wanted him around anyway.
The anxious side sat on the couch, feet resting on the coffee table as he scrolled through Tumblr on his phone.
“Hello Virgil,” he greeted.
“Sup Dee,” Virge replied.
“No insane dilemma on Thomas’s mind today?” Deceit asked, joining Virgil on the couch.
“Nope, not today,” Virge responded.
“At least you don’t have to deal with the freaks upstairs then,” Deceit commented.
Virgil scoffed. “To them we’re the freaks.”
“Feelings mutual,” was all Deceit said.
“Do you mind getting me some Crofters?” Virgil asked, putting his phone down and gesturing to the kitchen behind them.
“Do it yourself, you lazy emo,” Deceit insulted.
“Thanks,” Virgil replied, rolling his eyes.
Virge stood up from his place on the couch and made his way to the kitchen.
“How bad are the light sides?” Deceit asked, as Virgil dug through the fridge.
“Let’s see,” Virgil began, thinking, “Logic insults me 24/7, Princey calls me names at every opportunity he gets, and the Dad guy practically ignores me.”
“That’s Logan, Roman, and Patton for you,” Deceit mumbled.
“What?” Virgil asked.
“Logan, Roman, and Patton,” Deceit repeated. “That’s their names.”
“Oh,” Virgil responded, “I didn’t know that.”
“Surprised you didn’t overhear with all the time you spend upstairs,” Deceit said.
Virgil responded to that by throwing an orange at the back of Deceit’s head. Deceit just laughed.
“It’s not like they pay any attention to me anyway,” Virgil mumbled, returning to the couch, Crofters jar and spoon in hand.
“Let’s stop thinking about the perfect angels for a minute,” Deceit suggested, rolling his eyes at the perfect angels part, getting a laugh out of Virgil.
“Sometimes I forget you actually laugh,” Deceit commented.
“It’s such a rarity,” Virgil smirked.
They both started laughing. It was times like these Virgil realized he didn't need the light sides. He had everything he needed right here, with Deceit.
-
Deceit sat in the downstairs living room, sitting reading a book. It was a calm half hour like that before the infamous Anxiety came rushing down the stairs.
“Fun day, huh?” Deceit commented.
“Shut up,” Virgil responded, throwing himself onto the couch.
They sat in silence for awhile, Deceit reading his book and Virgil enjoying being in the company of a side that actually wanted him around.
“What are you reading?” Virgil asked.
“What do you think?” Deceit responded.
Virgil sighed. “It’s like you have an obsession with lying.”
“Well constantly going upstairs and partaking in discussions where the others in said discussion don’t appreciate you seems to be doing wonders for your mental health,” Deceit explained.
“Somebody’s got to,” Virgil muttered. “If I left everything up to those three Thomas would be publicly humiliated everyday.”
“Is that you or the anxiety talking?” Deceit asked.
“Is there a difference?” Virgil responded.
Deceit didn’t respond. He put his book down on the coffee table and turned to look Virgil in the eyes. “Answer me this, Virge.”
“Yes?” Virgil replied.
“How big of a panic attack are you holding back right now?” Deceit asked.
“What?” Virgil asked.
“How big?” Deceit repeated.
Virgil sat up, staring Deceit in the eyes. Deceit watched as Virge’s breath slowly sped up and tears began streaking down his cheeks. Deceit held his arms out to Virgil.
“I just want to be accepted,” Virgil sobbed, sinking into Deceit’s embrace. “Why can’t they just accept that anxiety’s apart of Thomas’s life? Why can’t they just accept me?”
“I don’t know, Virge,” Deceit replied. “I don’t know, but you don’t need them. You have me.”
“You’re the only one who really gets me, Dee,” Virgil commented.
“It’s what best friends are for,” Deceit smirked.
Just Deceit’s presence, his best friend’s presence, was lifting the panic attack off of Virgil. Virgil never felt more calm then he did with Deceit.
-
Virgil had never been happier. He finally got what he’d always wanted. He’d been accepted. They’d all realized how shitty Thomas’s life would be without him and they’d finally let him be their friend. Logan was done insulting him, Roman was done calling him names, and Patton was done looking through him. Virgil wasn’t going to let go of these new friendships, no matter what the cost. Virgil wasn’t expecting anything bad to happen when Deceit called him to his room.
“Hey Dee,” Virgil greeted, entering Deceit’s room. “What’s up?”
“What’s up?” Deceit repeated. “I don’t know, Virgil. What is up?”
“Dee, what are you talking about?” Virgil asked.
“Why?” Deceit asked. “I just want to know why.”
“I don’t understand,” Virgil replied.
“Why the light sides?” Deceit asked.
“Oh,” Virgil realized, “you mean Logan, Roman, and Patton.”
“Yes, them,” Deceit spat.
“Look,” Virgil started, “I can be friends with all of you.”
Deceit bitterly laughed. “It’s like I don’t even know you anymore. You finally get accepted by the light sides and now you’re a completely different person.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” Virgil asked.
“You’re not a light side, Virge,” Deceit explained. “You’re a dark side, like me. The bad guys.”
“I never wanted to be the bad guy,” Virgil muttered.
“Yeah, well we don’t get to make that choice,” Deceit stated. “So the light sides stay with the light sides, and the dark sides stay with the dark sides. You can’t cross the line.”
“You know, I don’t get it,” Virgil started.
“Don’t get what? I thought I was making it perfectly clear,” Deceit questioned.
“I don’t get why you seem to think you need to control everything in my life,” Virgil spat.
“I don’t get why you seem to think you need to run off and become friends with the light sides either, but that’s just how it is apparently,” Deceit shot back.
“They’re my friends, Dee,” Virgil repeated, through gritted teeth.
“Don’t you remember anything?” Deceit asked. “About the times they all made you feel unwanted? All the times Logan insulted you? All the times Roman called you names? All the times Patton completely ignored you? All the times they gave you panic attacks? You know, the panic attacks I fixed?”
“They were there for me when you weren’t,” Virgil pointed out.
“Oh yeah?” Deceit asked. “When?”
“I tried to kill myself today,” Virgil whispered.
“What?” Deceit asked.
“And they witnessed the way Thomas acts when I’m not around, and they stopped me without even realizing it. So yeah, you were there for me and you fixed some panic attacks, but you weren’t there when I really needed you.”
“Virge, I-”
“I don’t want to hear it,” Virgil interrupted. “You’re just a pathological liar.”
Deceit stepped back, as if physically hurt by Virgil’s insult. “Well if I’m a pathological liar, then you’re a baby who overreacts over everything and can’t deal with his own problems,” Deceit spat.
“I hate you,” Virgil mumbled.
“What was that?” Deceit asked.
“I hate you,” Virgil repeated, louder. “I hate you and your stupid snake face with a fiery burning passion.”
“Virge,” Deceit whispered.
“Don’t call me that,” Virgil said. “Goodbye.”
Virgil gripped the doorknob and ripped the door open, exiting Deceit’s room and slamming the door behind him. Deceit didn’t stop him. All he did was sink to ground and let the fact that he’d just lost his best friend sink in.
-
It’d been awhile since the others accepted Virgil and he had moved upstairs. Virgil hadn’t seen Deceit once since their fight, he couldn’t care less.
Him and the other three were dealing with another one of Thomas’s dilemas, whether he should lie to Joan or not. Virgil’s answer was no. All lying did was make him feel more anxious, but Roman was convinced Thomas should lie. At least Virgil knew Patton was on his side, but something seemed off about Patton. It wasn’t until towards the end of Thomas’s dilema, that Virgil realized why.
After Roman’s crazy performance and attempt to convince Thomas to lie, Patton switched views, deciding that Thomas should in fact lie, which didn’t seem like Patton.
“I can’t lie to them,” Thomas said.
“I’m so proud of you, Thomas,” Patton said, clapping. “You’re so mature.”
“Thank you,” Thomas said, confused.
“I knew something smelled fishy,” Virgil said.
“I smell it too, I told Thomas to take the trash out,” Logan said.
“Not that, it does smell bad,” Virgil said, “but I was talking about Patton.”
“Oh, you mean how he’s obviously-”
With the flick of Patton’s wrist, Logan’s mouth was zipped shut.
“Oh, I get it now,” Roman grimaced.
“What?” Thomas panicked.
Virgil explained to Thomas that there were sides to him that he didn’t like to know about, and he’d have to give them permission to tell him.
“Would you like to learn something new about yourself?” Roman asked.
Logan nodded.
“I don’t know,” Thomas said.
“I don’t know either, Thomas,” Patton taunted. “You might not like what you find.”
“Fine, tell me,” Thomas exclaimed.
“Deceit!” Logan exclaimed, ripping his hand off of his mouth.
That’s when the snake was revealed. Virgil’s ex best friend.
“Virgil, I love the more intense eyeshadow,” Deceit lied. “It definitely doesn’t make you look like a raccoon.
“Nice gloves,” Virgil shot back, “did you just finish washing some dishes?”
Deceit glanced down at the yellow gloves on his hands. “Yes.”
Virgil rolled his eyes.
The rest seemed to drag on. Thomas, Logan, and Deceit had a discussion before the real Patton showed up making Deceit leave. Virgil knew exactly what he was doing after Thomas didn’t need them anymore.
Virgil made his way downstairs, to the old living room him and Deceit used to hang out. Virgil saw him when he made it to the bottom of the stairs. Deceit was sitting on the couch reading a book.
“What was that?” Virgil asked.
Deceit looked up at him. “Virgil, I wasn’t expecting to see you. I thought you were too good to come down here now.”
Virgil rolled his eyes. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“I was just doing my job, Virgil,” Deceit replied. “Getting Thomas to lie. You know all about that.”
“Taking the form of Patton? Really?” Virgil spat.
“You seem to like Morality,” Deceit commented. “Tell me, Virgil, what does he have that I didn’t?”
“Is that what this is about?” Virgil asked.
“No,” Deceit responded, standing up. “I don’t care about you anymore, Virgil. I don’t need you and honestly I never did. So you can go have fun with your light side friends all you want.”
“Stay away from them,” Virgil ordered, grinding his teeth.
“I’ll try,” Deceit giggled. His giggle forming into an evil laugh.
Virgil hissed at Deceit before turning and walking back up the stairs.
“I see that Logic hasn’t made you anymore mature,” Deceit called up the stairs.
-
“Doesn’t it ever make you sad to remember that?” Patton asked.
“Sometimes,” Virgil answered. “But like he said, he doesn’t need me anymore, and I don’t need him.”
“Well thank you for finally sharing your history with Deceit with us, Virgil,” Logan responded.
“Yeah, it was quite intriguing,” Roman added.
“Whatever,” Virgil grunted. “The past is the past. There’s no point in looking back. Besides, all he ever was was a pathological liar.”

Chapter Text

The Flight

Patton was childish. It wasn’t shocking news. He might’ve been the father of the group but that didn’t take away from the fact that he was childish. The other three of course knew that about Patton.
The emotional trait’s birthday was creeping closer with each passing day and the others wanted to do something special for it. Keeping Patton’s childish nature in mind, Logan and Roman bought them all tickets to Disneyland.
Patton couldn’t have been more excited when Roman excitedly told him where they were going.
“We’re going to Disneyland!” Roman exclaimed.
“Really?!” Patton asked.
“Yep!” Roman answered.
“Why?” Patton asked, giggling. “What’s the occasion?”
“Your birthday, of course,” Logan explained. “We wanted to show you how much you mean to us, and we thought a trip to Disneyland was perfect.”
“Virgil, are you okay with this?” Patton asked, knowing how bad the darker trait’s anxiety got.
“I’m a little uneasy about it, if I’m being completely honest,” Virgil answered. “But it’ll be worth it for you.”
“Aww well thank you guys!” Patton cooed.
“Of course, Pat,” Logan replied.
A few weeks passed and it was finally the day before Patton’s birthday, the day they were leaving for Disneyland. Before they knew it, they were getting settled into plane seats.
Thomas had revealed that the sides were real, and a lot of people had sides, so no one really questioned seeing four people in public who looked exactly the same.
Logan and Patton sat in one row while Roman and Virgil sat in the row behind them. Roman and Patton got the window seats, since Patton was really excited about flying and Virgil had enough anxiety about flying as it was.
“Virge, are you going to be okay?” Roman asked.
“I want to be,” Virgil answered, laughing a bit.
“Just let me know if you need anything, or your anxiety gets too bad,” Roman said.
Virgil gave him a thumbs up as he slipped his headphones on.
They all found something to entertain them for the four hour flight. Virgil listened to his edgy PG 13 music, Roman kept his attention on one of the many Disney movies he brought along with him while also keeping an eye on how Virgil was doing. Logan was deep in a book and Patton was staring out the window.
One hour into the flight, Logan realized Patton had been staring out of the window for the majority of the hour. The logical side peered at his boyfriend out of the corner of his eye.
“Everything alright, love?” Logan asked, marking his place in his book before setting it down.
“Yeah,” Patton answered, turning to look at Logan. “Why wouldn’t it be? My birthday’s tomorrow and we’re going to Disneyland!”
“You just looked a little bored,” Logan explained.
“Kind of,” Patton sighed, leaning his head against his seat.
Logan stared into Patton’s ocean blue eyes. “You’re pretty,” he whispered.
“We look the same,” Patton giggled.
“You have different eyes though,” Logan pointed out.
“You always have liked my eyes,” Patton smiled.
Logan smiled back before leaning in and pressing his lips against Patton’s. Patton happily kissed back. They kissed for a few minutes, neither wanted to break the kiss. Logan cupped Patton’s cheek as Patton wrapped his arms around Logan’s neck, pulling him closer. It wasn’t until the kiss was deepened, that Logan felt a hard kick on the back of his seat.
“Get a room!” Virgil exclaimed.
Logan raised a middle finger over the top of the seats at Virgil, earning a laugh out of the anxious side. Patton giggled, pulling away from Logan.
“Later,” he whispered, pecking Logan one last time.
Two hours into the flight, Roman glanced over at Virgil to see he was biting his fingernails. Roman lightly tapped his shoulder, earning a jump from the anxious side before he slid his headphones off.
“What?” he asked.
“Are you doing okay?” Roman asked.
“Yeah,” Virgil answered. “Why?”
“You were biting your nails and that’s something I’ve noticed you do when your anxiety’s picking up,” Roman explained.
“Oh,” Virgil glanced down at his nails. “It’s picked up a bit, but not enough for an attack.”
Roman nodded. “Do you think you’re actually going to have an attack?
“I’ve had one every time I’ve been on a plane,” Virgil explained. “What would make today any different?”
“Not everything in life stays the same,” Roman reasoned.
Virgil shrugged. “It might happen, and it might not. If it does happen I’ll be prepared for it. Attacks aren’t new to me.”
“I know that,” Roman said.
Virgil nodded slightly before going to slip his headphones back on.
“Wait,” Roman said, grabbing Virgil’s wrist. Virgil grimaced a bit at the contact. “There’s something I want to ask you.”
“What?” Virgil asked, pulling Roman’s grip off of his wrist.
“It’s about Deceit,” Roman stated. Virgil cringed at the mention of his name before gesturing for the prince to continue. “Were you guys just friends, or more than that?”
Virgil stared at Roman after the question left his lips, taking in a shaky breath.
“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it,” Roman added.
“No, it’s fine,” Virgil sighed. “It was never official but, there was something there.”
“Really?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded. “Why him?”
“He was the only one who understood me,” Virgil explained. “Or I thought he was at least.”
Roman nodded, leaning back in his seat.
“Are we done?” Virgil asked.
“Yeah,” Roman answered, waving his hand. “Go back to your music.”
Virgil smiled before putting his headphones over his ears again.
Three hours into the flight, all four of them started watching Frozen together. They let Virgil pick the Disney movie since he was trying to fight his anxiety. He said Frozen was his favorite because the darker meaning behind it was depression and anxiety.
“How exactly is this about depression and anxiety, Virgil?” Logan asked.
“Well let’s just take a look at Elsa for a second,” Virgil began, “because of her powers, she pushes her sister and everyone else away, she cries and is unhappy a lot, she lost interest in building a snowman with Anna, she feels like no one will understand, she feels guilty, empty, hopeless, and she clearly has bad anxiety.”
“Wow, she sounds like you,” Roman pointed out.
Virgil scoffed, hoping no one realized what Roman actually said.
“You make a valid point, Virgil,” Logan stated.
“So Elsa’s depressed?” Patton asked.
“Exactly,” Virgil explained, “Elsa is just a metaphor for depression.”
“How’d you discover all this?” Roman asked.
“Tumblr,” Virgil muttered.
“Of course,” Roman scoffed.
“So your reason for liking a Disney movie is because it’s about depression?” Patton asked.
“Well yeah,” Virgil said, “it speaks to me.” He mumbled the last part.
Four hours into the flight, the sides were ready for it to be over. They had nine minutes left until they would touch down in California.
“Nine minutes left,” Logan announced. “Everyone okay?”
“I’m good,” Patton chripped.
“As perfect as ever,” Roman bragged.
“Virgil?” Logan asked, looking back at the darker trait.
Virgil glanced at Logan before giving him a thumbs up, immediately pulling his sleeve back over his hand.
“Are you sure?” Logan asked.
Virgil nodded. Roman glanced at the anxious side, suspiciously.
“Virgil, we know you,” Roman started, “we’ve known you for awhile now, and we know how to read you.”
Virgil glanced at Roman, knowing full well what he was talking about. At this point Patton had turned around to see what was going on.
“Are you having an attack?” Roman asked. Virgil quickly shook his head. “Then say something.”
Virgil’s breath caught in his throat. He felt more anxiety well up inside of him because of the way everyone was looking at him and what they were expecting him to do.
“Come on, Virgil,” Patton encouraged.
“I might not be okay,” Virgil stuttered, his voice echoing.
“It’s okay, Virge,” Roman reassured.
“It’s okay to not be okay,” Patton whispered.
“Just breathe, and everything will be okay,” Logan said as Roman placed his hand on Virgil’s thigh, tapping his fingers in a 4-7-8 rhythm.
Virgil followed their advice, breathing and trying to calm himself. After a few minutes, Virgil felt his heart rate slow back down to a normal speed.
“Are you okay?” Roman asked.
Virgil took in a sharp breath. “Yeah,” he stuttered, his echo gone.
“Good,” Roman smiled, removing his hand from it’s place on Virgil’s thigh.
Finally, the plane landed.

Chapter Text

Virgil sat in his bedroom, pushing his headphones closer to his ears, but no matter how high he turned the music up, he couldn’t block out the loud yelling coming from the room next door. He don’t know what they were fighting about and he didn’t want to know.
It wasn’t until he heard the door slams that he took his headphones off. Virgil groaned, holding his head in his hands. He slid his hand over to his phone, pausing the Panic At The Disco song he was listening to before pulling up his text conversation with Patton.

Virgil: Pat
Patton: Hey kiddo! How’s it going?
Virgil: I heard the yelling…
Patton: You did?
Virgil: You wanna talk about it ?

Virgil watched as the texting bubble came up but then quickly pulled away. A few seconds passed before there was a knock at his door.
“Come in,” he called, shoving his hands into his pockets.
The door cracked open and Patton popped his head in.
“Hi Patton,” Virgil greeted.
“Hey kiddo,” Patton whispered, entering Virgil’s room and closing the door behind him.
“Everything okay?” Virgil asked.
That’s when Patton burst into tears.
“Patton,” Virgil muttered, holding his arms out to him.
Patton made his way over to Virgil’s bed and snuck into his embrace, wrapping his arms around him.
“Logan and I-”
“Shh, don’t say anything,” Virgil whispered.
They sat there for a few moments, Patton sobbing into Virgil’s shoulder as he rubbed his back. It wasn’t until Patton had calmed down a bit, that Virgil pulled away.
“What happened?” Virgil asked. “What did he do to you?”
“He didn’t do anything, Virgil,” Patton answered.
“What?” Virgil asked.
“I started it,” Patton mumbled.
“But, why?” Virgil questioned. “Patton, I thought you loved Logan.”
“I did,” Patton answered, quickly. “I do.”
“Then what happened?”
“I don’t know! It just happened, I don’t know why I said those things but I said them. And I regret every single thing.”

-

“I don’t know!” he exclaimed. “It just happened, I don’t know why I said those things but I said them. And I absolutely hate myself for it.”
“Logan,” Roman started.
“Yes, I know, Roman,” Logan interrupted. “I’m a terrible boyfriend, I always have been.”
“Don’t say that about yourself, Logan,” Roman said. “I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye, but from what I can tell you’re a great boyfriend, and Patton loves you so much.”
Logan looked up at him. “So what should I do?”
“I think you should give it some time,” Roman suggested. “Give him some time to cool off, sleep in your own room.”
Logan nodded, adjusting his glasses. “Thank you for your help, Roman.”
“Anything for my nerdy, left brain friend.”

-

“Virgil, what do I do?” Patton pleaded.
“I think you should give it time,” Virgil suggested. “Give him some time to cool off, have a little time to yourself.”
Patton nodded, smiling a bit. “Thank you, Virgil.”
“Anything, Dad.”

-

A few weeks passed since Logan and Patton’s fight. They still hadn’t talked to each other, both taking Roman and Virgil’s advice. Logan slept in his old, abandoned room and Patton slept in his strangely empty feeling room. They were both starting to think the advice wasn’t working out for them.
Ever since they started dating, Logan practically moved into Patton’s room. Meaning most of his clothes and other belongings were in there. Tears would well up in Patton’s eyes whenever he would open his dresser, to get dressed in the morning, and see Logan’s clothes. Or when he would stand in front of the bathroom mirror, to brush his teeth, and his eyes would wander to the unused, navy blue toothbrush sitting in the cup. Or when he would open up his closest, deciding to wear his cat onesie, but then seeing the unicorn onesie hanging next to it. The obvious bags forming under his eyes became a thing too. Patton had once mentioned how hard it was to fall asleep without Logan. It hurt the most when Patton remembered the cat hoodie he was constantly tying around his shoulders was a gift from Logan. He hoped no one noticed when he went back to his original gray cardigan. Everyone noticed.
Things weren’t going well for Logan either. He couldn’t focus on anything for work or for what Thomas needed, his mind was on Patton all of the time. Falling asleep wasn’t a breeze either, so he was also sleep deprived. Just the lack of Patton’s arms around him and Patton’s kiss on his lips made his eyes water. Just the lack of Patton’s goddamn smile was making Logan sad.
One day, they couldn’t take it anymore. So Logan pulled out his phone and read him and Patton’s old text messages. He didn’t stop reading until he could barely breathe because of how hard he was sobbing. Patton pulled on one of Logan’s black shirts and looked through old pictures of them on his phone. He didn’t stop looking until he was distracted by a soft knock at his door.
“Who is it?” Patton called.
“It’s Logan,” the person on the other side hesitated.
Patton sighed, locking his phone and dropping it on his bed. “Come in.”
Patton’s door slowly opened and Logan entered the room, closing the door behind him. Patton immediately noticed the red around his eyes, Logan immediately noticed his shirt on Patton’s body.
“Lo,” Patton whispered.
“Is there a special reason as to why you’re wearing my shirt?” Logan asked.
“It smells like you,” Patton mumbled, pulling on the collar of the shirt.
“I’ve missed you too,” Logan admitted, under his breath. “Patton, I love you so fucking much, and I am so unbelievably sorry about everything that happened that night. I didn’t mean any of it.”
“I’m sorry too.” Patton smiled through the tears that were now streaming down his cheeks. “And I love you so so much.”
Logan smiled as Patton put his arms out, making grabby hands towards his boyfriend. Logan joined Patton on the bed, pulling him into his lap and pulling him to his chest. Patton snuggled into him, wrapping his arms around his neck.
“What were we even fighting about?” Patton giggled.
Logan laughed. “I don’t know.”
“Why did we let this drag on for so long?” Patton asked.
“Well I was just taking Roman’s advice,” Logan answered.
Patton giggled. “And I was taking Virgil’s advice.”
Logan laughed along with his giggly boyfriend, pulling him impossibly closer to him.
“I love you,” Logan whispered into Patton’s hair.
“I love you too,” Patton replied, pressing a kiss to Logan’s neck.
“There’s something I’ve wanted to do for a month now,” Logan started.
“And what’s that?” Patton asked.
“This,” Logan answered, cupping Patton’s cheek and guiding him to look at him. He stared into those ocean blue eyes he loves so much before leaning forward and connecting their lips. Patton eagerly kissed back.
“I’ve wanted to do that for a month too,” Patton said against Logan’s lips once they pulled away.
Logan smiled before leaning in for another kiss.

Chapter Text

Patton’s Birthday

Once they made it to the hotel, they decided to hang out for the rest of the day. They wanted to spend the entire day at Disneyland so they decided to wait until Patton’s actual birthday.
They made it to the hotel room and they couldn’t have been more excited. Roman had got them the hotel suite, so they entered into a room with a couch against one wall with a coffee table in front and a TV hanging on other wall. There was a mini kitchen in the corner and a door on the left wall that led to the bathroom. There was a doorway on the far wall, that led into another room with two double beds, a bedside table in between them, and a TV in front of them. There was a door next to the TV that led into the master bedroom. It had a double bed, a TV, and a door that led to the bathroom.
There was already an unspoken agreement that Logan and Patton would get the master bedroom, so Virgil immediately claimed the corner bed.
They got to California around six, so Logan and Patton hung out in their room and Roman went for a walk, giving Virgil time to himself. He basically just spent it listening to music and scrolling through Tumblr. It wasn’t until it got dark that Roman came back.
“How’s it going, sweetheart?” Roman greeted, flopping down on his bed.
“I have a name, and it’s not sweetheart,” Virgil snapped. “And we’ve also been over this already, you’re in the friendzone.”
“Sorry,” Roman apologized. “I just wanted to see how you’d react.”
Virgil scoffed.
“Did you hear anything from their room yet?” Roman asked, gesturing to Logan and Patton’s room. “I heard these walls were pretty thin.”
“You’re really ruining my innocent image of Patton, Ro,” Virgil stated.
“Sorry,” Roman laughed.
The night passed. Logan and Patton went to sleep and Roman forced Virgil to go to bed before three am so they could get to Disneyland early. Then morning came, and it was Patton’s birthday.
Patton’s eyes fluttered open as sunlight soaked into his room. He smiled when he felt Logan’s arms wrapped around him. He turned around to find that Logan was awake.
“Good morning, love,” Logan greeted, kissing Patton’s nose.
“Morning,” Patton giggled, wrapping his arms around Logan’s neck.
“Happy birthday,” Logan smiled, leaning his forehead against Patton’s.
“Thanks Lo,” Patton smiled back.
“Should we wake the others so we can get ready for our drive to Disneyland?” Logan asked.
“But I want to stay here,” Patton whined, burying his face in Logan’s shoulder.
Logan chuckled, running his fingers through the moral side’s hair. “Well I suppose we could stay like this for a little while longer.”
“I love you, Lo,” Patton mumbled.
“I love you too, Patton,” Logan replied.
A few peaceful moments passed before their bedroom door flew open and banged against the wall, startling Patton and making him bury himself farther into Logan’s embrace.
“Alright, lovebirds, it’s time to go to Disneyland,” Roman exclaimed, prancing into the master bedroom.
“Roman, what the hell?” Logan questioned, slipping on his glasses.
“I’m excited about Disneyland, okay?” Roman stated.
“Don’t worry, Patton, it’s just Roman,” Logan reassured his boyfriend, who was gripping tightly onto the logical side’s waist.
“Roman, did you scare Patton?” Virgil asked, pulling his sweater sleeves over his shaky hands.
“I didn’t mean to,” Roman defended.
“It’s his goddamn birthday, Roman,” Virgil snapped.
“Stop,” Patton interrupted, sitting up. “This isn’t what I wanted.”
“Sorry, Pat,” Roman apologized.
“Happy birthday,” Virgil mumbled.
“Let’s get ready for our drive,” Logan sighed.
The sides got dressed, ate breakfast, and did other essential things before piling into their rented car. Logan drove with Patton in the front seat, and Roman and Virgil in the back.
The drive was an hour long, so Virgil slipped on his headphones and stared out the window for the majority of the drive. The rare moments when an edgy song wasn’t being blasted into his ears, were pretty funny though.
He took his headphones off twice during the drive. First he witnessed Roman obnoxiously singing along to the Disney songs playing on the radio and annoying Logan. It really was a mistake it play those songs.
“Let it go, let it go,” Roman sang.
“Roman, kiddo,” Patton began, turning around in his seat, “if you don’t stop annoying Logan, we’ll turn this car around.”
“But-” Roman started.
“Stop singing or I’ll crash this vehicle into a fucking wall,” Logan snapped.
Roman responded to that by glancing at Virgil before they both started screaming.
“Okay, kids, calm down,” Patton raised his voice.
“Sorry,” Roman giggled.
Patton rolled his eyes, turning back around as Virgil laughed to himself.
Second he witnessed Roman purposely singing badly along to the songs on the radio. He was singing them pretty bad since Logan had turned off the Disney songs and those were the only songs he actually knew the words to.
“Hey who sings that song?” Patton asked.
“Kesha,” Roman answered, confused.
“Why don’t you let her sing it?” Virgil suggested.
Roman made an offended noise as Logan and Patton laughed from the front seat.
“Burned,” Logan stated, putting his hand out to high five Virgil. The anxious side smirked, high fiving him.
Roman rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and looking out the window. “You guys are so mean to me.”
“Shut up, Hans,” Virgil insulted.
Roman gasped. “You take that back!”
“Make me,” Virgil smirked.
“Prinxiety,” Patton giggled.
“Patton,” Virgil groaned as Roman laughed.
Finally they made it to Disneyland. Patton and Roman were so excited.
A lot of events took place during their day at Disneyland. They rode rides. On certain rides, Roman and Patton would go as fast as possible while Logan and Virgil would take it calmly. Roman took Logan on the rides Virgil was too anxious to ride.
“Hey Roman,” Patton greeted, approaching the creative side. “What’re you doing?”
“I think that guy’s flirting with Virgil,” Roman spat, pointing at Virgil and this other guy.
“And maybe he is,” Patton stated.
“Can I kill him?” the prince asked.
“Not in public,” Patton answered.
They watched as Virgil shook his head and retreated from the guy.
“Hey guys,” Virgil greeted, approaching them.
“Was that guy flirting with you?” Roman questioned.
“Oh hell yeah,” Virgil answered. “But I shut him down.”
Roman made an offended noise, glaring back at the guy.
“Whoa, calm down, Princey,” Virgil said. “Tuck your jealousy back in.”
“Sorry,” Roman mumbled.
“Come on, guys,” Patton started, “let’s go find Logan.”
They started walking through the crowds, trying to find Logan, when someone pushed past Virgil.
“Sorry,” Virgil mumbled.
“Why are you apologizing?” Roman asked. “He’s the one who wasn’t paying attention.”
“I’d rather avoid confrontation,” Virgil answered. “It’s fine.”
Roman shrugged, letting it go as someone pushed past Patton, who was walking in front of them.
“Hey, watch where you’re going, you piece of-” Virgil yelled.
“Virge, calm down,” Roman interrupted, grabbing Virgil’s arm and pulling them to the other side of Patton. “Avoid confrontation, remember?”
“Right,” Virgil sighed, pulling his jacket sleeves over his hands.
Soon night fell and they had time for one more ride.
“Guys!” Patton exclaimed. “Let’s go on the Ferris Wheel!”
“No,” Virgil laughed, “I’d rather not.”
“Why not, Panic At The Everywhere?” Roman asked.
“Anxiety,” Virgil snapped, gesturing to himself.
“Right,” Roman sighed.
“You guys go ahead,” Virgil said. “I don’t want to hold you back on your birthday, Patton.”
“Virgil,” Patton started.
“Why don’t Virgil and I stay behind?” Roman suggested. “You two haven’t really had any time alone today.”
Patton glanced at Logan. The thought of being alone at the top of the Ferris Wheel with his boyfriend on his birthday did seem pretty great.
“Okay,” Patton agreed, looking back at Roman. “Meet you guys at the car.”
“Got it,” Roman replied.
“See you, Dad,” Virgil responded. “And happy birthday.”
“Thanks kiddo,” Patton giggled, intertwining his fingers with Logan’s and leading him towards the Ferris Wheel.
They paid their tickets and climbed into an outer car. They sat in silence as the car rose to the top, Patton staring at the view and Logan with has arm around Patton. Finally, they made it to the top.
“The view is truly beautiful,” Logan gasped, amazed.
“Not as beautiful as you,” Patton replied, turning to face Logan.
“That was so cheesy,” Logan pointed out.
“I know,” Patton giggled.
Logan smiled, sliding his hand, from around Patton’s shoulders, to his cheek. Logan took a moment to stare at his boyfriend, before Patton eagerly connected their lips. Logan smiled against Patton’s lips, kissing back.
“Happy birthday,” Logan whispered, pulling away.

Chapter Text

I sat at up at my desk. It couldn’t be true. There was absolutely no way. I stayed up long hours into the night, googling the symptoms. Sweating, increase in heart rate, etc. All google said was I was “in love”. Yeah right. I was Logic. Thomas’s logical thinking side. I couldn’t fall in love. I didn’t have emotions.
The logical explanation would be to go to Patton for help, since he was Thomas’s emotional side. So what was holding me back from going to Patton for help? Maybe it was because Patton was the one making me feel this way. Maybe I truly was in love with Patton. It seemed illogical, but there was only one real way to find out.
“Logan, I wasn’t expecting you,” Roman greeted, opening his bedroom door.
“Hello Roman,” I replied.
“What brings you here?” he asked.
“I may need your assistance,” I answered.
“With?” he prompted.
“Emotions,” I hesitated.
A concerned expression crossed the prince’s face before he stepped to side, allowing me into his room. I entered Roman’s bedroom and he closed the door behind me.
“Why’d you come to me?” Roman asked. “Why not Patton?”
“It’s complicated,” I replied.
“Okay, go ahead,” the prince stated, “explain.”
“I began feeling this emotion around a month ago and it’s been eating away at me,” I explained. “I normally don’t feel emotions so this was a strange experience for me. After a little investigating, I came to the conclusion that this emotion was originating from a person. Google said I was in love, but I was unsure. I thought since you’re the romantic one, I’d come to you.”
“Wow,” Roman sighed. “Logan Sanders is in love?”
“Don’t make a big deal out of it, Princey,” I snapped, rolling my eyes.
“Sorry,” Roman chuckled. “So who’s this person these feelings have been originating from? Hot Topic or Dad?”
“Roman,” I groaned.
“What? I’ll be more help if I know who it is,” Roman defended. “But I have to say, it better not be Virgil because you are no match against me.”
“Last time I checked, you’re in the friendzone,” I mumbled.
“I’m working on it,” the prince sighed. “But seriously, is it Virgil?”
“It’s not Virgil,” I grimaced, shaking my head.
“Oh, so that’s why you didn’t go to Patton for help,” Roman realized.
I sighed, nodding.
“Well this shouldn’t be too hard,” Roman muttered. “I suggest doing something with him that he likes.”
“What does he like?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Roman answered. “Shouldn’t you know? You’re the one who’s in love with him.”
I groaned.
“Go ask Virgil,” Roman suggested. “He’s got to know at least something Patton likes, right?”
I sighed. “I guess you’re right.”
“I’m always right,” Roman laughed.
“I don’t see a necktie,” I smirked, pulling open Roman’s door and stepping out into the hallway.
I heard Roman’s groan before swinging the door closed. I took a deep breath, glancing at Virgil’s room. Did I actually want to do this?
I knocked on the anxious side’s door, hearing shuffling before the door swung open.
“Oh, hey Logan,” Virgil greeted.
“Hello Virgil,” I replied. “May I come in?”
“I guess,” Virgil muttered, stepping to the side and allowing me to enter.
Virgil closed the door behind me before making his way back to his bed. “What’s up?”
“You know Patton pretty well right?” I asked.
“Yeah, he’s my best friend,” Virgil answered.
“Is there anything he likes to do that he could do with some company?” I asked.
“Well yeah,” Virgil responded, “he likes to bake. Why?”
“No reason, in particular,” I answered.
“Oh my God,” Virgil gasped.
“What?” I asked.
“You’re in love with him,” Virgil exclaimed.
“What?” I asked, shaking. “That’s ridiculous. I’m Logic. I can’t fall in love.”
“Just admit it, Logan,” Virgil responded. “You’re in love with Patton.”
“Preposterous,” I replied. “I’m not in love with Patton.”
I watched as Virgil picked up his phone and put it to his ear.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Calling bullshit,” Virgil snapped.
I rolled my eyes.
“Bottling up emotions isn’t good for you, Logan,” Virgil explained. “I’d think you’d know that the best.”
I sighed, sitting down at Virgil’s desk chair. “I don’t get it. I’m not supposed to have emotions. I’m Thomas’s goddamn logic. But when I’m around Patton, everything feels different.”
I was interrupted by a knock at Virgil’s door.
“Who is it?” Virgil asked.
“It’s Patton,” the person on the other side responded.
“Come in,” Virgil called, smirking at me. I glared at him.
The door swung open and Patton entered the room.
“Logan!” Patton exclaimed. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”
“Hello Patton,” I greeted. “Virgil and I were discussing something, but I was just leaving.”
Virgil glared at me.
“Well okay,” Patton replied. “I was just coming to say dinner’s ready.”
“I’ll be down in a second, Pat,” Virgil said.
“Okay, kiddo,” Patton flashed a grin at Virgil before smiling at me, making my heart flutter.
I slammed my hand on Virgil’s desk once Patton had left the room. “That’s it, I’m killing him.”
“Or you could just man up and ask him out instead,” Virgil suggested.
“But killing him would be so much easier,” I muttered.
Virgil laughed. “Patton’s heart is already yours, Logan.”
“What?” I asked.
“He already loves you, idiot,” Virgil explained. “He talks about you nonstop. I would know, I’m his best friend.”
“Really?” I questioned.
“Really,” Virgil confirmed. “Tell him you want to talk to him after dinner.”
“Okay,” I agreed. “I will.”
Virgil smiled at me before standing up and heading out of his room.
During dinner I was shaking with anticipation, thinking about what I was going to say, how Patton was going to react. Before I knew it, Roman and Virgil had left the dining room and Patton and I were standing side by side, washing our dishes.
“Patton, can I talk to you?” I asked.
“Of course, Lo,” Patton replied. “What’s up?”
“I’ve just been thinking recently,” I began.
“Thinking about what?” Patton asked.
“You,” I answered.
“Me?” the emotional side asked, pointing to himself.
“Yes, you,” I confirmed. “Now, here’s the problem, Patton.”
“I’m a problem?” Patton interrupted.
“No,” I answered, quickly. “You’re not a problem. You’ll never be a problem, Patton. I’m a problem.”
“What do you mean?” Patton asked.
I sighed. “I do not understand feelings. I’m not supposed to have them, you are.”
“Where is this going, Logan?” the moral side questioned.
“I feel, Patton,” I blurted out, “and it makes no sense.”
“Logan,” Patton whispered.
“And I’m scared,” I mumbled.
“What are you feeling?” Patton asked.
“Patton, I think I’m in love with you,” I explained.
Patton stared at me, wide eyed.
“Sorry,” I replied. “I realize that this isn’t what you expected.”
“No, Logan,” Patton interrupted. “I think I’m in love with you too.”
“Really?” I asked.
Patton nodded before blushing and looking down at his feet. “Will you go out with me?”
“Yes, I believe that would be satisfactory,” I replied.
Patton looked up, smiling at me. “You won’t regret this.”

Chapter Text

Virgil leaned his back against his bedroom door as it closed. He didn’t know why he even tried anymore. They never listened to him and always treated him like the bad guy. And every time this happened when Dee wasn’t around, it was the same unhealthy coping mechanism he used. He hated himself for it, but it was just another thing to add to the long list of things he hated himself for.
No one else knew he did this. Not Logic, not Princey, not Patton, and not even Dee.
Virgil took his checkered black jacket off, tossing it onto the bed before pulling out the key he always kept in his jeans pocket. He crouched down in front of his bedside table and slid the key into the lock, turning the key and pulling the drawer open. Inside the drawer was a single, silver blade. Virgil reached into the drawer and picked up the slightly crimson tinted blade. He held it in his hand before glancing down at his exposed wrists, taking in the sight of the scars permanently etched into his skin.
He knew he’d never be able to get rid of them, but he wore a hoodie all year long so did it matter?
Soon, he brought the blade to his wrist and created more permanent marks. He sucked in air through his teeth as he watched the crimson liquid drip down his arm.
“Hey kiddo!” a cheery voice from behind him exclaimed.
Virgil froze.
“Hey Patton,” Virgil stuttered.
What the hell was Patton doing in his room?
“What are you doing?” Patton asked.
“Nothing,” Virgil answered quickly, reaching over and grabbing his jacket, slipping it on and holding the blade in his fist before turning around to face Patton.
“Anxiety,” Patton started, “what’s in your hand?”
“Nothing,” Virgil repeated.
“Your sleeves don’t go down that far, kiddo,” Patton pointed out. “I can clearly see that you’re holding something.”
Virgil let out a breath.
“I won’t be mad,” Patton whispered.
Virgil closed his eyes, holding back tears as he opened his fist and revealed the blade drenched in fresh blood.
“Anxiety,” Patton whispered, taking the blade from Virgil.
“You said you wouldn’t be mad,” Virgil responded quickly, snapping his eyes back open.
“I’m not mad,” Patton replied. “But why?”
“Well you guys treat me like shit,” Virgil explained.
“Language,” Patton snapped.
“Sorry,” Virgil sighed.
“Can I see?” Patton asked.
“What?” Virgil questioned.
“Can I see?” Patton repeated, gesturing to the blade in his hand.
“Oh,” Virgil responded, before hesitantly sliding his jacket off his shoulders.
Virgil’s jacket hit and ground and he shakily held his wrists out to Patton. The light side just stared at Virgil’s wrists in shock. Deep scars ranging from fresh and old littered the anxious side’s arms along with the thick crimson streaks dripping down his left arm.
“We make you feel this bad?” Patton asked.
“No Patton,” Virgil responded quickly. “It’s not you.”
“But I’m one of them, Anxiety,” Patton whispered.
“Patton,” Virgil snapped, placing his hands on Patton’s cheeks. Patton tried to shy away from him but Virgil held a steady grip. “This isn’t you.”
Patton took a deep breath, tears now streaming down his face. “Does anyone else know?” Virgil shook his head. “Even the other dark sides?” Virgil shook his head again.
Patton glanced at the stained blade in his hand before sliding it into his pocket, making Virgil grimace.
“Here,” Patton began, taking Virgil’s right arm. He conjured a black hair tie and slipped it onto Virgil’s wrist. “Anytime you feel like doing it again, snap that against your wrist.”
Virgil gripped the hair tie and snapped it, cringing at the stinging pain. “Why are you helping me?”
“That’s my job,” Patton replied. “If I’d known you were doing this, I would’ve helped you a long time ago.”
Virgil stayed silent for awhile, before responding, “Thanks Patton.”
“Anything for you, Anxiety,” Patton replied, smiling.
Virgil realized how wrong it felt to be called Anxiety in that moment. “My name is Virgil,” he spit out before he could stop himself.
Patton glanced at him, smiling even larger. “Anything for you, Virgil.”

Chapter Text

The Gem

“Guys,” Roman exclaimed, popping up in the living room.
“God, Roman,” Virgil exclaimed, jumping a bit in his seat. “Could you maybe warn us first, before popping up out of nowhere.”
“Sorry, Panic At The Everywhere,” Roman sighed. “Anyway I found something mysterious in the Imagination.”
“You control the Imagination,” Logan stated. “Nothing in there should be mysterious to you.”
“Shut up, Microsoft Nerd,” Roman groaned, before pulling a clear gem out of the ruffles of his prince outfit.
“What is that?” Virgil asked, sinking further into his chair.
“I don’t know,” Roman answered. “I found it in this cave I found and thought it looked cool.”
“What were you doing exploring caves?” Virgil questioned, bitterly.
“There was this legend going around in my kingdom and I just had to dig deeper,” Roman explained.
“What’s the legend?” Patton asked, leaning forward in his chair, seeming very interested and excited about what Roman was talking about.
“Legend goes that there was this certain gem that if you rubbed it, you’d wake up the next morning and get to live another life for one day.”
“That sounds physically impossible, Roman,” Logan stated.
“Anything is possible in the Imagination,” Roman smirked.
“What exactly does that mean?” Patton asked. “Waking up the next morning and getting to live another life for one day?”
“I’m not sure,” Roman shrugged, “but I want to find out.”
“Are you sure it’s safe?” Virgil mumbled, pulling his sleeves over his hands.
“Of course,” Roman answered, waving off Virgil’s question. “Now, who wants to go first?”
Roman looked around at the other sides. He felt his features fall when no one spoke up.
“I’ll go,” Patton exclaimed.
“Patton,” Logan started.
“Don’t parent the parent, Logan,” Roman scolded. “Let the man live his life.”
“That man happens to be my boyfriend, and I don’t want him getting hurt,” Logan snapped.
“I second that,” Virgil added.
“Guys, it’s fine,” Patton giggled. “Would Roman really bring home something dangerous?”
“Yes,” Logan and Virgil answered at the same time.
“Just give me the gem,” Patton said, rolling his eyes.
“You just have to rub it,” Roman repeated, handing the gem to Patton.
“Like this?” Patton asked, rubbing the gem with his thumb.
The other sides watched as the clear gem started to glow a dark blue.
“Whoa,” Roman gasped, his eyes widening.
“What did that do?” Patton asked, as the gem faded back to it’s original clear color.
“I don’t know,” Logan mumbled.
“My turn,” Roman called, grabbing the gem from Patton’s hands.
“Roman, maybe you shouldn’t,” Virgil mumbled. “It could be dangerous.”
“Stop worrying so much, Virge,” Roman ressured. “Everything will be alright, and besides, it’s only one day.” Roman began rubbing the gem. It changed from clear to a deep purple, before fading back to clear.
“Purple,” Roman commented. “Patton, you got dark blue right?”
Patton nodded. “Logan, it’s your turn.”
Roman handed the gem off to Logan. “Alright, fine,” Logan sighed.
“Logan, you’re really going to do this bullshit?” Virgil asked.
“Language,” Patton scolded.
“I guess,” Logan replied, rubbing the gem. The gem turned to a vibrant red for Logan. “Red,” Logan reported.
“Virgil,” Roman started, as Logan held the gem out in Virgil’s direction.
“Fine,” Virgil groaned, taking the gem and rubbing it. For Virgil, the gem turned to bright blue. “Light blue,” Virgil sighed.
“And nothing happened,” Logan commented.
“Yeah, I noticed,” Roman stated, annoyed as he took the gem back from Virgil, putting it back into the ruffles of his shirt.
“I don’t know what you were expecting to happen, Ro, but it obviously didn’t happen,” Virgil stated.
“The legend says it’s not supposed to happen until tomorrow morning,” Roman defended.
“Give it up,” Virgil snapped. “Nothing’s going to happen.”
Virgil stood up from his chair, making his way upstairs to his room.

Chapter Text

“Baby, it would be adequate if you’d go to sleep,” Patton heard Logan mumble from behind him.
Logan laid in Patton’s bed as the emotional trait stared at his calendar.
“What’s so important on that calender anyway?” Logan asked.
“Lo, how many more days is it until December 19th?” Patton asked.
“Three,” Logan replied.
“Shit,” Patton muttered under his breath.
“Did our sweet cinnamon roll of a father figure just swear?” Logan asked jokingly, sitting up and putting his glasses on.
Patton just shrugged it off.
“What’s so important about December 19th anyway?” Logan asked.
“December 19th is Virgil’s birthday,” Patton answered.
“What?” Logan asked.
Patton sighed. “You didn’t know that did you?”
“No,” Logan mumbled.
“Well we can’t just sit around and do nothing about it,” Patton stated. “Tomorrow me, you, and Princey are going out and preparing for Virgil’s birthday.”

***

The next day Patton dragged Logan and Roman out of the house before Virgil woke up to prepare for his birthday. They bought all necessary ingredients to throw the perfect birthday party for Virgil and they got back home before he even woke up.
Patton did all the preparations. Wrapping the gifts, writing “DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT TOUCHING, VIRGIL ANXIETY SANDERS” on the cake box, and making sure all the decorations were ready.
The day passed and it was finally Virgil’s birthday. Logan, Roman, and Patton woke up before Virgil (as usual) and put their plan into action. Roman worked on decorating, Logan worked on getting the gifts set out, and Patton worked on putting the candles on the cake. Soon, everything was ready.

***

Virgil groaned as he sat up in bed. He rubbed his eyes before climbing out of bed. He did his usual morning routine. Taking a shower, getting dressed, and doing his makeup, before he shoved his hands into his hoodie pockets and made his way downstairs.
Immediately after leaving his room, Virgil could tell something was off. All the lights in the house were turned off. The only light coming into the house was the sunlight coming in through the window. Virgil blew air out through his mouth, anxiety already filling up inside him. He trudged through the darkness and down the steps when all the sudden the lights came on. Virgil hissed at the sudden brightness, pulling his hood over his head and squeezing his eyes closed.
“Surprise!”
Virgil slowly opened his eyes. He was met with the living room decorated in black and purple streamers and balloons. There was a purple banner hanging above the main window that read “Happy birthday Virgil!” in black letters. Standing in the middle of the living room was Logan, Roman, and Patton.
“Oh, hey guys,” Virgil stuttered, pulling his hood down. “What’s this for?”
“Your birthday!” Patton exclaimed.
“Oh,” Virgil responded, pulling his phone out of his pocket and turning it on. Virgil noticed that the date did in fact read December 19th. “I guess it is my birthday today, isn’t it?”
“Wait, you didn’t know?” Roman asked.
“Nope,” Virgil answered.
“How could you have not known?” Logan asked. “It’s your birthday.”
“I’ve never really celebrated my birthday before,” Virgil replied.
“How?” Patton sputtered.
“The dark sides didn’t really like birthdays,” Virgil explained, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. “They just looked at them as a day marking you closer to death, so even if I did celebrate my birthday, it would be very depressing.”
“Well then we’re going to make this the best birthday you’ve ever had,” Patton exclaimed.
“Yeah,” Roman agreed.
“It would be adequate if we’d do that for you, Virgil,” Logan stated. “Birthdays are a special time of year and we wouldn’t want you to miss out on that.”
Virgil stared at all three of them for a moment, before a small smile spread across his lips. “Thanks guys.”
Patton crossed the living room, grabbing Virgil’s hand and pulling him to the couch. Virgil sat down as the others pushed their presents towards him.
“This one’s from me so you know it’s the best one,” Roman stated, pushing forward a present wrapped in red with a gold ribbon.
Virgil rolled his eyes, ignoring Princey’s present and instead going for the present wrapped in light blue with a gray ribbon. Virgil grabbed the tag attached to the ribbon. To: Virgil, from: Patton :). Virgil smiled slightly, undoing the gray bow and throwing the ribbon to the side before ripping open the light blue wrapping paper. Inside was a box. Virgil opened the box to find a purple teddy bear with button eyes and stitched markings on it’s body.
“Patton,” Virgil said, pulling the teddy bear out of the box.
“For when I’m not there to comfort you,” Patton explained.
“I love it,” Virgil claimed, pulling the teddy bear to his chest.
“What are you going to name him?” Patton asked.
Virgil pulled back from the teddy bear, giving it one good look. “Pat,” Virgil replied.
Patton smiled at him.
“Mine next,” Roman exclaimed, breaking the wholesome moment.
“Fine,” Virgil huffed, putting Pat down and pulling forward the red gift.
The tag read To: Hot Topic, from: Princey <3. Virgil rolled his eyes before tearing the gift open. Inside was a small package. Virgil opened the package to find a gray shirt.
“A shirt?” Virgil asked, raising his eyebrow.
“Read what it says,” Roman prompted.
Virgil sighed before pulling the shirt out and reading what it says. “It’s not you, it’s my anxiety,” Virgil read out loud.
“Do you like it?” Roman asked, laughing a bit.
Virgil stayed quiet, before chuckling slightly. “Yeah.”
“I guess that leaves me,” Logan stated.
Virgil grabbed the small package wrapped in dark blue with a black ribbon. He read the tag. To: Virgil, from: Logan. Virgil tore the wrapping paper and was met with a box. He opened the box and gasped at the sight.
“You’ve had your other ones for so long, I just thought it was time for a change,” Logan explained.
“I love them,” Virgil breathed.
“What are they?” Roman asked.
Virgil responded by pulling them out of the box. In Virgil’s hands were a new pair headphones, designed specifically for Virgil. They were black and in purple written on one side was “I actually don’t have anything bitter or cynical to remark” while written on the other side was “Panic At The Everywhere”.
“Those are cool, Logan,” Roman stated.
Logan smirked, adjusting his glasses.
“Thank you, Logan,” Virgil stuttered. “And thank you guys for you gifts too.”
“Of course, Virgil.”
“Anything, Virgil.”
“You’re welcome, my chemically imbalanced romance.”
Next it was time for cake. The cake Patton got was a chocolate cake with purple frosting, and written in black icing on the top was “Happy birthday Virgil!”.
Patton insisted they light the candles and sing happy birthday, so that’s what they did.
“What did you wish for?” Patton asked, once Virgil had blown out the candles.
“He can’t tell you, Patton,” Logan responded. “That would defeat the entire purpose.”
“Surely, he can tell us, Microsoft Nerd,” Roman replied.
“I didn’t wish for anything actually,” Virgil answered.
“What? Why not?” Roman asked. “There are so many great things to wish for.”
“What could I possibly wish for when I already have everything I could ever wish for?” Virgil replied, smiling at all of his friends.
And in that moment, Virgil couldn’t have been happier to now be a light side

Chapter Text

Who’s Who?

Patton stirred in his sleep. He felt his fluffy blankets cuddled around him and the warm body of his boyfriend in his arms. But something felt off. Normally, Patton was the one with his arms around Logan’s neck and his head resting on his chest. But this morning Logan was the one with his arms around Patton’s neck, and Patton had his arms around Logan’s waist.
“Lo?” Patton asked, eyes fluttering open.
Imagine Patton’s surprise when he looking down at who he thought was Logan, and found himself. In Patton’s arms he found another Patton, sound asleep and wearing the blue sweater Patton normally wears to bed.
Patton screamed, jumping away from the other Patton. The other Patton woke up with a start at the sound of Patton screaming. The other Patton looked at Patton before their eyes widened and they screamed back.
“Who are you?” Patton asked.
“What do you mean?” the other Patton asked. “I’m-” The other Patton trailed off when they looked down at their hands.
Suddenly, the door burst open to reveal Roman.
“You two. Downstairs. Now,” Roman stated.
The two Pattons nodded before grabbing their glasses and following Roman downstairs to the kitchen. In the kitchen they found Virgil standing in the middle of the room. The other Patton’s eyes widened at the sight.
“Which one of you is Roman?” Roman asked.
“What do you mean?” Patton asked.
“What’s going on?” the other Patton stuttered, pulling their sweater sleeves over their hands.
“I’m Roman,” the Virgil said.
“What?” Patton asked.
“This must’ve been what your stupid legend meant,” the Roman explained. “We switched bodies.”
“If you’re Roman,” the other Patton started, “then who are you?” they pointed to the other Roman.
“I’m Logan,” the Roman said.
“Logan,” Patton gasped. “It’s me! Patton!”
“Hello Patton,” Logan smiled at him.
“So you’re Virgil,” Roman stated, pointing at the other Patton. The other Patton nodded.
“Of course, it all makes sense,” Logan said.
“What?” Roman asked.
“When I rubbed the gem, it turned red,” Logan explained. “Which is why I became Roman. When Patton rubbed it, it turned dark blue. Which is why he became me. When Virgil rubbed it, it turned light blue. Which is why he became Patton. And when Roman rubbed it, it turned purple. Which is why he became Virgil.”
“Well how do we turn back?” Virgil snapped.
“The legend said it’s just for one day, right Roman?” Logan questioned.
“Right,” Roman replied.
“Then we should turn back tomorrow,” Logan stated.
“Tomorrow?” Virgil asked. “But what if Thomas needs us? I can’t do Patton’s job. I’m Anxiety, not Morality.”
“Well you’re Morality for today,” Patton chriped.
“I can’t do Patton’s job,” Virgil insisted. “That’s not how I work.”
“I agree with Hot Topic,” Roman said. “How do you expect me to be dark side?”
“Watch it,” Virgil snapped.
“Sorry,” Roman muttered.
“Just deal with it for today,” Logan huffed. “There’s nothing we can do about it.”
So the day went on. It was nearing 2pm and the sides thought they were in the clear. But they spoke too soon because right at 2, Thomas summoned Logan and Roman, who were actually Patton and Logan.
“Hey guys,” Thomas greeted, not looking up from his computer.
“Hey Thomas,” Patton cheerly exclaimed.
“Wow Logan,” Thomas said, looking up at Patton. “You’re energetic today.”
“Oh, yeah,” Patton muttered.
Thomas proceeded to ask Patton and Logan for their help for videos.
“What do you think of this idea, Roman?” Thomas asked.
“That idea’s very illogical, Thomas,” Logan responded.
“What?” Thomas asked.
“I mean it’s good,” Logan replied, quickly.
Thomas continued to ask Logan for ideas and ask Patton if the ideas would logically work. Logan and Patton tried their best to seem like Roman and Logan, and they did pretty well. But Thomas could tell something was off.
“Okay guys, I think that’s good,” Thomas said. “Thanks for your help.”
“Anything for you, Thomas,” Patton chriped.
“Are you guys feeling okay?” Thomas asked.
“Of course,” Logan answered. “Why wouldn’t we be?”
“You guys just seem a little off,” Thomas explained.
“Nope, we’re feeling fine, right Roman?” Patton questioned.
“Yes, Logan,” Logan replied. “I’m feeling fine.”
“Okay,” Thomas responded, as Logan and Patton sunk out.
Next Thomas summoned Patton, who was actually Virgil.
“What’s up, Thomas?” Virgil asked.
“Patton, you seem a bit down today,” Thomas pointed out. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Virgil answered.
“Not hiding your emotions with a fake smile again?” Thomas questioned.
“Nope,” Virgil responded, trying to sound cheery.
“Okay, well I need your help with something,” Thomas said.
“What is it?” Virgil asked.
“I still have some video stuff to work on, but Joan just asked if they and a few friends could come over to hang out,” Thomas explained. “Which should I do?”
“Well obviously you should say no and get your work done,” Virgil responded. “Something bad could happen if you don’t get this finished, so it’s better if you say no.”
“Patton, that doesn’t sound like you,” Thomas stated.
“You know, you’re right,” Virgil sighed. “You should invite them over. Have fun with Joan.”
“Okay,” Thomas responded. “Thanks Patton.”
“Yep,” Virgil sunk out.
Next Thomas summoned Virgil, who was actually Roman.
“You called?” Roman asked.
“Virgil, I need your help,” Thomas said, urgently. “Joan’s having a panic attack.”
“Why do you need my help with that?” Roman asked.
“I need help calming them down,” Thomas explained. “You’re my anxiety, you should know how to do this.”
“Okay Joan,” Roman stuttered. “There’s nothing you need to be panicking about. The world is so amazing, there’s no reason to be worrying about anything.”
“Virgil, that doesn’t sound like you,” Thomas stated.
Roman sighed. “Okay Joan, just breathe. 4-7-8, remember?”
Joan nodded, following the 4-7-8 pattern Roman mentioned. Soon, Joan calmed down.
“Okay?” Roman asked.
“Okay,” Joan confirmed.
“Virgil, are you and the others okay?” Thomas asked. “You guys have been acting really weird today.”
“Uh,” Roman glanced at the clock. 11:59. “You’ll see.”
“What do you mean?” Thomas asked.
12:00. Roman watched as red and purple started to swirl around him. When the colors cleared, Virgil’s hoodie was replaced by Roman’s usual outfit.
“I’m back,” Roman exclaimed.
“Roman?” Thomas asked. “That was you the entire time?”
“Yep,” Roman smirked.
“Roman, appears your little gem has been reversed,” Logan stated, rising up.
“Logan, you’re back to normal too,” Roman exclaimed.
“Guess who’s back,” Patton exclaimed, rising up.
“My precious bangs, thank god,” Virgil gasped, appearing.
“What is going on?” Thomas asked.
“Roman brought a strange gem back from the Imagination that made us all switch bodies for a day,” Logan explained.
“Wait so who was who?” Joan asked.
“I was Logan, Roman was Virgil, Virgil was me, and Logan was Roman,” Patton explained.
“That actually makes a lot of sense,” Thomas stated.
“Well I’m glad we’re back to normal so now we can actually help Thomas properly,” Virgil said.
“Amen,” Patton chriped.

Chapter Text

“What?” Virgil asked his empty room.
He slid his headphones off for a second before putting them back on, but that didn’t stop the noise from reaching his ears. He wasn’t sure exactly what he heard, but it sounded like it was coming from next door. Virgil slid his headphones off of his ears again and listened.
“Logan-”
Virgil’s breath hitched in his throat as his eyes widened. Was this actually happening right now? Virgil’s train of thought was cut off by another sound coming from Patton’s room. Virgil groaned. He did not want to know about that part of Logan and Patton’s relationship. Virgil ignored the loud sighs coming from the other room and put his headphones back on.
Virgil sat on his bed, with his hood on and his hands in his pockets while listening to music, before he heard his phone go off. Virgil sighed in protest before reaching over and grabbing his phone, finding a text from Roman.

Roman: Can you do something about the noise? It’s making me very uncomfortable

Virgi: Why do I have to do something about it? Why can’t you?

Roman: Patton’s YOUR best friend

Virgil: So?

Roman: So… he’ll listen to you

Virgil: Fine… give me a second

Virgil tossed his headphones onto his bed, getting up and heading towards his door. He threw the door open and marched down the hall to where the… sounds were coming from. Virgil stood in front of Patton’s bedroom door as he heard screams coming from inside.
Virgil cringed, banging his hand on the door. “Alright, lovebirds, quiet down!”
When the noises didn’t stop, the anxious side gripped the doorknob and pushed the door open. The sight he was greeted with was not one he was expecting.
Logan and Patton were sitting on the floor in front of Patton’s TV, with Nintendo Switch controllers in their hands.
“How did you beat me at Mario Kart again?!” Logan exclaimed.
“Black magic,” Patton giggled.
“This is what you guys have been doing?” Virgil questioned.
“Well yeah,” Patton answered, looking over in Virgil’s direction.
“What did you think we were doing?” Logan asked.
“You know what? I’m done,” Virgil sighed, putting his hands up. “Just try to keep it down next time.”
“Got it,” Logan replied.
“Bye Virgil!” Patton chirped, as Virgil turned on his heels and walked out, closing the door behind him.
“What do you think he thought we were doing?” Patton asked, putting his controller down.
“I’m not sure,” Logan replied, also putting his controller down. “But now that he’s gone, would you enjoy copulating?”
“Sure,” Patton smirked, leaning in and connecting him and Logan’s lips.

Chapter Text

They all sat in a circle on the carpet of Thomas’s living room. Thomas was bored so he summoned the sides and suggested they play Truth Or Dare. As you could probably guess, their game started out pretty wholesome.
“Logan, truth or dare?” Patton asked.
“Truth,” Logan responded.
“How many dogs are there in the world?” Patton inquired.
“Patton, you realize you’re supposed to ask Logan a question about himself right?” Roman asked.
“Let him have his fun,” Thomas responded.
Logan smiled at his boyfriend’s adorable question. “It’s estimated to be about 900.”
“900 puppies,” Patton cooed, gasping.

“Thomas, truth or dare?” Roman asked.
“Dare,” Thomas responded.
“I dare you to g note Virgil,” Roman replied, suppressing a laugh.
“Hey!” Virgil exclaimed. “Leave me out of it!”
“Sorry Virge,” Thomas apologized. “A dare is a dare.”
Virgil groaned as Roman summoned a piano into the corner of the room. The anxious side cringed in anticipation as Thomas got up from his spot in the circle and approached the piano. Thomas’s eyes scanned the piano keys before they found the one he was looking for. He pushed his finger down on the key, earning a yelp from Virgil when the note played. Roman burst into a fit of laughter.
“It’s not funny,” Virgil snapped through gritted teeth, pulling the hood of his jacket over his eyes.
“It’s very funny actually,” Roman laughed.
Virgil rolled his eyes, wiping away the few tears that had streamed down his cheeks.
“Whoa, are you okay, Virge?” Thomas asked, sitting back down in the circle.
“I’m fine,” Virgil stated.

Then Roman got bored with the wholesome questions and dares, and decided to make things a little more interesting.
“Patton, truth or dare?” Roman asked.
“Dare,” Patton responded.
“I dare you to kiss one of us,” Roman replied. Patton glanced at Logan before Roman added, “besides Logan.”
“Uh,” Patton choked, a blush spreading across his cheeks.
Thomas and Virgil stared at Roman, wide eyed, while Logan glared at him. No one really knew this about Logan, but he got jealous very easily. Especially when it came to Patton.
“A dare is a dare,” Roman smirked.
Patton swallowed before turning his head towards Virgil. “Virgil?”
Virgil stared at Patton, mouth agape. “Me?” he asked, pointing a finger at himself.
Patton averted his eyes as he nodded. He leaned in before planting a soft kiss on Virgil’s lips. They both pulled away quickly and looked anywhere but each other. Meanwhile, Roman bit his lip, slightly jealous that Patton had gotten to kiss Virgil before he did. Deep down he was hoping Patton wouldn’t chose to kiss Virgil. But Roman’s jealousy was nothing compared to the fuming jealousy Logan was trying his hardest to hide.
Their game of Truth Or Dare ended pretty quickly after that since Roman was the only one who was really in the mood anymore. The sides said their goodbyes to Thomas before sinking out back into the mindscape.
“Hey,” Roman started, before everybody split off into their rooms, “sorry about my dare back there. It was kind of uncalled for.”
“It’s okay, kiddo,” Patton chriped.
“It was kind of awkward, but it’s not that big of a deal,” Virgil shrugged.
Logan stayed quiet.
Virgil and Roman immediately retreated to their respective rooms afterwards as Logan and Patton made their way to Patton’s room.
Once Patton’s door had closed into place, Logan pressed himself against the moral side. A yelp escaped Patton’s lips before he sunk into the forceful kiss being pressed against his lips.
After a few minutes of kissing, Logan pulled away.
“Virgil’s lips didn’t feel better than mine, right?” Logan asked.
“Aw Lo,” Patton exclaimed, wrapping his arms around Logan’s neck, “are you jealous?”
“Yes,” Logan mumbled. “I actually get jealous pretty easily, mostly surrounding you since you’re so adorable. I mean, how could someone not love you?”
Patton responded by planting a loving kiss on Logan’s lips. He pulled back before saying, “Lo, I love you and only you. Yeah, I kissed Virgil, but that doesn’t mean anything. It was just a stupid dare. My feelings for you haven’t changed just because I kissed my best friend.”
Logan nodded, a small smile making it’s way onto his lips.
“I love you, Logybear,” Patton smiled.
“I love you too, Pattycake,” Logan whispered, leaning in to kiss Patton once more.

Chapter Text

Virgil took another deep breath, pulling his blanket over his head. He couldn’t believe this was happening again. Virgil had panic attacks at night but recently they’d been worse. So bad that he’d gotten about thirty minutes of sleep in the past three days, this was the fourth day. Virgil cursed under his breath, hearing the echo that followed.
Virgil threw his blanket off of his head, getting off his bed and pulling his bedroom door open. He softly made his way down the hallway, heading to the kitchen for a glass of water, but stopped in his tracks. There was light seeping in from underneath the door to Virgil’s right. The light in Logan’s room was on. This confused Virgil since Logan was all about going to bed at a decent hour and he normally sleeps in Patton’s room.
Virgil softly knocked on Logan’s door. “Logan?”
The door creaked open to reveal Logan. “Virgil? What are you doing up this late?”
Virgil opened his mouth to answer, before remembering the echo his voice currently had. All the sides knew what it meant when Virgil’s voice was echoing.
Virgil swallowed before replying. “I could ask you the same thing.”
Virgil noticed Logan’s features fall at the sound of the echo. “Do you want to come in?” Logan asked.
Virgil thought for a second before nodding. Logan stepped to side, allowing Virgil to enter the room.
“Are you okay?” Logan asked. “Why are you having-“
“I get them at night sometimes,” Virgil interrupted. “It’s been worse recently.”
Logan stepped closer to Virgil. “4-7-8.”
Virgil nodded, following the 4-7-8 pattern. Logan breathed along with him. Virgil felt his heartbeat start to slow down.
“I’m okay,” Virgil sighed, his echo gone.
“How bad has it been?” Logan asked.
“I’ve gotten about thirty minutes of sleep in the past three days,” Virgil responded. “Why are you awake?”
“I could not fall asleep,” Logan answered.
“Not even with Patton?” Virgil raised an eyebrow.
“Not even with Patton,” Logan confirmed. “Anyway, you may hang out in here as long as you like.”
Virgil nodded, smiling slightly Logan.
They ended up just sitting in silence, enjoying each others’ company and talking here and there. Logan sat in his desk chair while Virgil laid on his bed.
“What was the first emotion you felt?” Virgil asked.
“Love,” Logan replied.
“For Patton?” Virgil questioned.
Logan nodded, smiling to himself. “When was the first time you had an attack?”
“Too long ago to remember,” Virgil groaned.
After awhile they both fell asleep, both knowing who to turn to whenever they couldn’t sleep.

Chapter Text

The sides sat in the living room watching Sleeping Beauty. Roman sat in a chair, Logan and Patton sat on the couch cuddling, and Virgil sat on the floor leaning his back against the couch.
“Are you sure you don’t want to sit up here, kiddo,” Patton asked.
“I’m okay,” Virgil mumbled.
“Isn’t this movie great, guys?” Roman asked, excitedly.
“Not exactly,” Virgil answered.
“What?” Roman exclaimed.
“I mean it’s not that bad, but it’s not that good either,” Virgil explained.
“You monster,” Roman gasped.
Virgil laughed in response, waving off Roman’s comment. But the longer they sat and watched the movie, the more Roman’s comment started to bother him.
It echoed in his head. You monster. More voices started to echo in his head. His own voice. You’re a monster. You don’t help Thomas. You hurt him. You’ve become a monster. You’re just a dark side. You’re horrible, terrible, worthless, useless. You’re a disorder, a mental illness, a monster. You’re a bad guy. You’ve always been the bad guy, and you always will be.
Virgil’s breathing sped up as he listened to the voices. Some were old voices from before he was a light side, some were new ones he’d never heard before. He closed his eyes, holding his head in his hands as he blinked back tears. His mind arguing over whether the voices were lying or telling the truth.
Virgil’s heartbeat got so loud he swore the others could hear it. He was about to have a full on panic attack.
“Virge?” Roman asked. “Are you okay?”
Virgil looked up at the others.
“Are you-?” Patton trailed off, but Virgil knew exactly what he meant.
Virgil shook his head, taking a deep breath. “No.”
“What’s wrong?” Patton asked.
“I know you meant it in a joking way, Roman,” Virgil started, “but getting called a monster kind of triggers me.”
“Wait really?” Patton asked.
“Virgil, I’m so sorry,” Roman gasped.
“It’s okay,” Virgil sighed.
“Why does it trigger you?” Logan asked.
Virgil hesitated. “I used to call myself one all the time before,” he trailed off.
Patton pulled away from Logan and scooted over, tugging on Virgil’s hoodie. Virgil lifted himself up, getting onto the couch with Patton. Patton hugged him.
“We love you, Virgil,” Patton whispered. “You’re not a monster and you’re definitely not the bad guy. You’re the goodest guy to ever good.”
Virgil laughed. “Thanks guys.”