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I'm Okay Now

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   Jack sat next to you as you read the lore book Sam had suggested. Since being at the bunker he insisted on a crash course in the supernatural especially when it came to angels. Castiel had confirmed that you were, in fact, pregnant with a Nephilim. Meanwhile, you had bonded with Jack the most. He was like the little brother you’d never had and was committed to helping you with the baby given he was a former Nephilim.

  You sighed closing the book tired and hungry when you saw the initials. It was clearly Sam and Dean’s although you’d never noticed them before. You traced your fingers along the carvings over Dean’s initials a part of your heart aching for a man you’d never officially met. Well, he did tell you to run and led you to Sam, but that was hardly a greeting.

  “Jack? What was Dean like?”

  “Why do you ask?”

  “I don’t know. He saved my life and I just feel some kind of connection to him. It’s weird I guess but also technically this is our child. Michael may have been running the show and supped up my child but essentially it’s Dean,” you ran your hand across the small bump. “It’s dumb I know.”

  “I don’t think it’s dumb. Dean’s a really good person. I think he’s afraid to let people see him be vulnerable though,” Jack answers thoughtfully.  

  “I hope they find him and get rid of Michael. I hate being stuck here while they go after him,” you pouted but then again you’d probably be completely useless.

  “I don’t like it either but if they can save Dean. Sam, Bobby, and Mary will make it happen.”

  “Jack! Y/N! They’re back!” Castiel calls from the hallway that from what you remember leads to the garage. Jack smiles like a kid at Christmas flying out of his chair and disappearing down the hall after Castiel.

  You swallowed pushing back from the table before standing. You didn’t know what seeing Dean would be like since the night he told you to find Sam. You slowly made your way past the other hunters before finding the stairs that led to the garage. You could hear voices behind the door and opened it just enough to hear the conversation but they couldn’t see you.

  “So she’s here?” you recognize his voice.

  “Yeah, Dean, she’s here and she’s safe. She doesn’t leave the bunker,” Sam answered and you watched him put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. Dean kept his head down but nodded.

  “You should tell her I’m here. She probably doesn’t want to see my face since I gave her a death sentence. She knows that the baby is going to kill her, right?”

  “Dean she knows all of that. Rowena is looking for a way to stop that and we are combing the lore books again. We won’t let her die this time.”

  “Well, tell that to Kelly,” Dean looks up glaring at Sam but stops meeting your eyes. You shake your head disappearing back into the hallway heading toward your room. You shut the door behind you ashamed that you couldn’t face him right now. Your heart was broken at the thought of causing him more pain.

  He was there again just watching you from the corner of the room. His entire body lit up in magnificent ice blue fire. Michael smiled spreading his wings as you climbed off the bed protectively covering your belly, “Get away from us!”

  “I’m only here to protect you. To protect our child,” the fire vanishes and he steps forward. “Our child will change the world and only I can make sure you’re here to see it.”

  “Why do you still look like Dean? He’s free of you,” you ignored his ramblings. It wasn’t the first time he showed up in your dreams.

 “Is he Y/N?” Michael reached out pulling you against him as his lips pressed against yours. You fought back pushing him away not kissing him in return. He pulls away smiling leaning into your ear, “I’ll be watching you.”

   You gasped sitting up sweat pouring off you. You looked over and realized you must have fallen asleep when you left the garage. The clock now read a little after eight in the evening and your stomach grumbled angrily. You climbed out of the bed slipping on a sweater and using the restroom before stepping out into the hallway. Things are never really quiet in the bunker with all the hunters around but you don’t meet anyone as you found the kitchen. You open the door to the fridge finding the pecan pie you’d made a couple of days ago.

  You turn to the table and Dean is sitting there nursing a beer as you stab into the pie with your fork, “It’s not what it looks like.”

  “It kind of looks like you’re eating all the pie without sharing,” he teases.

  “Ha,” you grab another fork heading to the chair across from Dean. You hand him a fork and take another bite, “Technically I am sharing.”

  “Baby doesn’t count,” he speaks through his large bite.

  “Umm yes it does,” you stuck your tongue out taking another bite. Dean watched you with a slight smile.

  “I’m Dean by the way,” he finally says. “I mean officially I just thought I should introduce myself.”

  “I’m Y/N but I assume we know each other enough to move past the awkwardness.”

  “What awkwardness? Oh, you mean the angel possessing me getting you pregnant with a child that will definitely kill you,” Dean deadpans and the soft smile has faded into a frown.

 You sat down your fork pushing the pie away reaching for Dean’s hands. Surprisingly he allowed you to take them but refused to look up at you, “You know Dean the blame for this doesn’t lay at your feet. I know why you said yes to Michael. Sam and Cas wouldn’t tell but Jack did and honestly, I get it. Of everything I’ve heard about you sacrificing yourself to save them seems pretty much in your wheelhouse. But this,” you let go of his hands placing yours on the baby bump, “I let him into my home. I did something I’ve never done because he was handsome and I thought he wanted me. I guess he did although not in a way that I hoped for.”

  “So you think I’m handsome?”

  “Clearly not the point of the conversation, Dean,” you chastise him but it’s good to get a laugh out of him. “The point is I made the decision to sleep with him. I wasn’t forced or anything it was my choice. The only person who didn’t have a choice was you.”

  “Who are you?”

  “Y/N, trauma nurse, and mother to be,” you smiled shrugging.

  “You know we’re going to do everything in our power to save you right? I mean that.”

  “I know Dean but you realize the baby is part of you too. So we need to think of some really good names.”

   “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

   “Makes sense,” you look down tracing over the outside. “He inhabited your body and doesn’t really have any sperm himself. He just kind of Superman’d yours.”

  Dean sat back his mouth opening and closing as if searching for an argument to make. He finally threw his hands up in the air, “I’ve never thought about it like that so I can’t argue with that logic.”

  “See you’re already learning that Mama knows best,” you teased pulling the pie back to you.

  You stayed in the kitchen with Dean until the pie was finished and you could barely keep your eyes open. He offered his elbow and led you back to your room but when he went to leave you stopped him grabbing his arm. Dean tensed but didn’t move.

  “Y/N, are you okay?”

  “You’re sure Michael’s gone, right?” you had wanted to be strong but now the idea of going back to sleep had reminded you of the dream. Michael had said he’d be watching and he still looked like Dean in your dream.

  “I’m positive. Not to mention he couldn’t get in the bunker if he tried using me as a ride or not,” he moved out of your grip and took your hands into his. “You’re safe, Y/N.”

   “Okay, I trust you,” you leaned forward pressing your lips to his cheek. “Goodnight Dean.”

   “Goodnight Y/N. I’m right down the hall if you need anything.”

    You stepped in closing the door leaning your head against the wood imagining Dean on the other side. You had wanted to invite him in but it didn’t seem proper given the circumstances. At least it was until the knock sounded and you opened the door. You’d barely opened it when Dean pulled you into his arms pressing his lips to yours in a heated kiss. You slammed the door shut and began pawing at his shirt your hormones dictating where this was going.

   “Tell me to stop,” Dean begged but you couldn’t even if you wanted to. You answered by pushing your sweater off and pushing your leggings down. “Fuck,” Dean gasped pushing you back to the bed.

    “I want you, Dean. Please,” you begged as he positioned over you. Your hands grasping his warm skin, “I need you.”

    “I’ll take care of you, Y/N,” he moved quickly mouthing at your neck bringing gasps from you. He pushed his pants down and without preamble or need to prep because of your wanton need slipped his cock easily into your core.

   “Dean,” you gasped holding the back of his head. It was a mistake letting your guard down as it would come to light later. Dean’s body was locked with yours but his eyes were wide and burning a bright blue. Michael wasn’t about to let his best weapon out of his sight, either of them, in fact, his sword and his child.