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Why Not Us

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The TARDIS dematerialises out of Norway and back into the time vortex with all of her passengers on board safe, if not a little shaken up from the events of the day.

“If everyone doesn’t mind I think I’m just going to go and be quiet for a bit, if that’s okay.” Graham says. He’s trying to wrap his head around seeing an almost perfect replica of his late wife

“Sure thing, tell you what the library is that way two rights and then four lefts. It’s quite relaxing in there when I want some quiet.” The Doctor suggests. She doesn’t see him leave the console room because she’s busy applying some sort of ointment to Ryan’s head where he was hit by a door to the face.

“How hard was it for him?” Ryan asks the woman patting his head with cotton wool.

“Quite hard I think.” She sighed. “He kept believing it was actually her until she basically told him to chose her over looking after you.”

Ryan doesn’t say anything in return, only smiles. Seeing how happy this information had made him the Doctor felt her hearts warm at the thought of the two’s relationship only growing stronger.

“There, that should work. Don’t touch it for 12 hours and it may start to sting around the 10th hour.”

“You’re starting to sound like and actual doctor, Doctor.” Ryan says as he moves to follow Graham to the library, just to check if he’s okay. “Thanks, Doc.” The Doctor nods in recognition while she puts away the ointment.

Yaz appears from the other side of the control panel with a question on the tip of her tongue but she doesn’t know how to go about it. She had noticed that in the mirror-verse Graham had his Grace, and Erik had his dead wife but herself and the Doctor had no one. Was it because the other universe hadn’t prepared for them? Or was it something else?

“You scared me back there.” The Doctor tells Yaz as she comes into view. “When you got zapped back into the antizone. I didn’t know what had happened for a second and it frightened me.”

“I was alright. We all got out in time.” She reassures the Doctor. She heard her shout her name as she was being thrown back and it added to the panic Yaz refused to show, because the Doctor had never sounded so distraught around them up until that moment.

“Doctor why didn’t the mirror verse have a copy of a loved one for you?” Yaz asks.

“Not sure really.” The Doctor perches herself on the console as Yaz steps I front of her. “I’ve loved so many people in my time, platonically and romantically. Perhaps there were just too many to choose from. If they put all of them in the universe would probably collapse there and then, so it probably just ignored me.”

“And what about me? I didn’t have anyone.”

“No you didn’t did you? That’s quite strange that. I think we just have to assume that universe wasn’t expecting us to turn up so didn’t formulate anyone. It called for Graham and produced Grace but we didn’t get called at all, we went at our own will.”

“ ’spose so.” Yaz shrugs.

“Or…” The Doctor does that thing Yaz hates where she loses herself in her own thoughts for minuets at a time without telling the person in the conversation with her what she’s thinking.

“Or What?” Yaz prompts to get her to talk out loud.

“Or we just didn’t look hard enough. Maybe they were there but we we’re too busy on trying to get out we didn’t pay attention. Could’ve been right in front of us.” The Doctor theorized.

“Maybe. The world was set up for the pair in question to have solitude alone together, so if there was anyone for either of us they might not have been able to approach us because we were together the whole time. ”

The Doctor nods. “We were, weren’t we. Alone together for a bit too.” She acknowledges, looking gently at Yaz, and Yaz looks up to meet her eyes. The Doctor looked as if she was wanting Yaz to realise something, something she didn’t want to bring up herself. But the Doctor could tell Yaz wasn’t catching on, she just looked confused. Either PC Khan really didn't know or she was choosing to ignore the obvious. “I guess we’ll never know. Another mystery of the universe!” She brushes it off and Yaz smiles at the other woman’s enthusiasm.

“Right,” Yaz slaps her thighs. “I need to get out of these muddy clothes from falling flat on my backside in the antizone and you need a shower. You smell from running about."
The Doctor sniffs her armpits and scrunches her face in disgust.

“Oh, yeah, no that’s nasty.” The Doctor grimaces while Yaz starts walking away laughing. The Doctor walks in the other direction away from the control panel. She reassures herself that the reason neither of them had a loved one was because the universe wasn’t expecting them. Yeah, the universe hadn’t planned for them, that’s why. And she repeats this until the other option leaves the forefront of her mind, because the other option can’t happen. Can't it?