You didn’t usually eat much because you were never very hungry. When you went out, you’d order an appetizer or just eat a small amount. Your weight was always something you were conscious about, and you got nervous when asked to wear tighter clothing.
You never talked to anyone about it… until now.
“Ok Fam! No. Gang? Team! We’ve been invited to Yaz’s Sister’s birthday dinner at her flat!!” The Doctor says excitedly as she hops around the console, “Will there be food? I hope there will be food! Pakora… No… Samosas!”
“Doctor, it’s a birthday dinner. Of course there will be food!” Yaz quips back at her
“I can nip to the shops by Park Hill and grab her some chocolates, a bottle of wine, and a card.” Graham suggests
The Doctor beams.
“A card!! I really want to sign that card!” she says
“Doc, now you’re just being weird.”
“Don’t kill the mood, Ryan. I’m just enthusiastic about parties, that’s all!” The Doc replies
You shuffle your feet on the floor quietly. You always stayed in your room instead of eating with the Team. You blamed it on time adjustment from traveling in the TARDIS, but in reality, you didn’t want them to see you eat. It’s still a tough point for you.
“Y/N, we’ve landed! Want to come up to Yaz’s flat with me and begin setting up for the surprise party?” The Doc asks
You look around and realize that Graham and Ryan have already left, and that Yaz is waiting in the open TARDIS door.
“Oh- Yeah! One sec, let me grab a sweatshirt from my room.” you reply
“Ok! We’re not in a rush, we are here really early!” Yaz calls as you walk off to your room
You open the door to your closet and grab a large (Y/F/C) sweatshirt. You pull it on and head to the mirror.
Still not enough
You adjust the shirt, fix your hair, and do a quick rinse of your face.
You head up to Yaz’s flat where her mum and dad were beginning to cook for Sonya’s party.
“Yaz’s Mum!” The Doctor calls as soon as you all enter the flat
“Doctor! It’s so lovely to see you! Y/N! You too!”
Najia comes over and hugs both of you. She’d become like your second Mum since you’d been traveling with Team TARDIS.
You and the Doc hang streamers while Yaz helps in the kitchen.
“SURPRISE!!” everyone cheers as Sonya walks through the door “Happy Birthday!”
“Oh my god! Hi!” Sonya replies, obviously shocked
“Let’s eat!!” Hakim says
Everyone settles into the table and starts tucking into the Pakistani feast that the Khan’s had prepared. You grabbed a bit of rice and some bread.
The Doctor ate like a child in a room full of pizza, and you were slightly concerned that she’d go quickly into a samosa coma.
“Want any chicken tikka or naan?” Yaz asks you
You put your fork down.
“No thanks, but thank you though! I’m not terribly hungry.” you reply
“You sure? We haven’t eaten together much, but you don’t eat a lot when we do.” The Doctor says quietly to you
You take a sip of water and adjust yourself on your chair. You really don’t like talking about this.
“I’m fine, Doc.” you lie, “I had some snacks on the TARDIS and kinda filled up on those.”
She looks at you again, concern in her eyes.
“Ok. I just don’t want you to be hungry later.” she replies
“Thanks.” you smile
After Sonya opens her presents from Team TARDIS and her parents it’s pretty late, but she decides to watch a movie with Yaz.
You head back to the TARDIS to head to bed. The TARDIS chirps at you as you enter.
“Hey you. How’ve you been?”
VWOORP PING VWOP
“Yeah? Me too. What am I saying… I can’t speak machine. It’s useless.”
“She’s concerned about you.” a voice calls out from behind you
You turn, startled, to see the Doctor standing in the closed doorway.
“And I am too.” she finishes
Your heart drops. Has she figured it out?
“It-It’s nothing, Doc. Really.”
“It’s not nothing, Y/N. There’s obviously something bothering you, and when people I care about are struggling, I want to help.” she says softly, walking toward you
You look down and shuffle your feet uncomfortably.
“I’m… I don’t feel like I’m enough.” you choke out
“Wha-? Y/N.” the Doc starts
“Ever since middle school I’ve felt like this. I try so hard but I can never lose enough weight. I can’t be who I want to be at… this weight.”
The Doctor is a little thrown
“Y/N,” she says softly, “Oh Y/N.”
Tears fill your eyes and she wraps you into a tight hug.
“They teased me. They made mean posts about me. I was the ‘big one’ and no one wanted to be friends with me.” you sob into her shoulder
“Hey,” the blonde says as she tilts your head to meet her gaze, “I’m your friend. And so is Ryan, and Graham, and Yaz. We adore you! And never ONCE have I thought about weight. You are you and I don’t care if you tell me that you’re secretly a fish or that you have 3 arms or no bones in your body because you are you. Weight doesn’t define personality at all. Not in any way. You are absolutely amazing, and brave, and selfless, and wonderful just the way you are. Nothing can change who you are. We love you.”
You choke over your words but are met with her hazel eyes looking into yours.
“Thank you, Doc.”
“There’s not a magic wand that I can wave to help you. Sadly, what happened happened. But I want to help. There’s absolutely no judgement from me, or anyone on here for a fact. You are safe here. And if you ever need to talk, my room is just across the hall from yours!” she says to you
“You are extraordinary” you say back to her, “Thank you.”
She smiles her goofy smile and pulls you back into a hug.
“No. You’re extraordinary.” she says while placing a kiss on your forehead.
You pause a second, arms wrapped around her, alone, in this moment with her.
How on earth did I manage to make the best friends?
“Hey Doc?” you ask
“Can I eat dinner with you guys tomorrow night?”
“Of bloody course!!! Yes!!! We’re making pasta!” she laughs
“Sounds amazing!” you say