Devotion does not remember her creation. She thinks, perhaps, it happened long ago. But it may have only been recently, as well.
Time does not always make sense to her.
She remembers being asked to take a physical form. Something pliant, and tactile, and weaponizable. He tells her that true loyalty is hard to come by, in current days. That he needs someone he can trust. But she can feel herself beginning to change, becoming something other than Devotion. She knows it is his other half attempting to quell whatever is taking root inside of her. She has begun questioning each time someone is sacrificed; Was their devotion not enough? It certainly seemed to be. Each spirit and person destroyed in shows of power and retaliation, and for what she can only find to be vanity at its roots, sending shocks of doubt through her.
Des tells her she is lucky to be given the opportunity. She supposes he must be right. Surely Desire would know better than she. And certainly her Elgar'nan would only have his peoples well being at heart. It was his devotion to them that had formed her, after all.
She agrees to take the body he has crafted for her.
Perhaps another perspective will help her to see things more clearly.
The body is a thin, but strong thing. More dramatic looking than many of the others she has seen in the floating city. There are sharp cheekbones and a pointed chin. Tanned skin and long white hair with ivy green eyes, and his markings in white adorning her face. Muscles beneath the tight fitting skin, with long fingers and legs that seem a tad too long.
Walking is very difficult, at first. But she learns quickly.
A skill that ends up benefiting her greatly, as her new body is put through its paces. She learns how to fight, and how to cast spells. She cuts her hair short when it gets in the way of her tasks and her training, and though he disapproves of the change in aesthetic, he understands why she made the choice.
Choice is new. She likes it.
They give her several weapons, teach her to use daggers and swords and bows, but in the end she prefers her bare hands, and the occasional staff. The flames feel stronger that way, and Elgar'nan approves of her choices, which is what matters in the end, she supposes.
She learns that she is to be a weapon. An extension of him, to reach where he physically can not.
There are others with the same title.
She likes the comradery that comes with them.
She likes people, she finds.
She roams the towns and greets the children and laughs with those she calls 'friend’ and discovers that some people even like her.
But it is not always in ways she approves of.
The first time someone attempts to touch her sexually without her consent, she sets them ablaze.
It feels very satisfying.
She is still young, and brought before Elgar'nan for her punishment when the incident is reported.
For a moment she wonders if perhaps he will punish her as he punishes the rest. But it seems as though her own nature will lend her a modicum of flexibility; a rare opportunity from her Lord, and not one she intends to squander.
“They attempted to sully the gift you gave me,” she explains, twisting the situation to make it seem as though it were an affront on himrather than to herself “I would not presume that merely anyone were capable of handling such a carefully crafted thing, after the effort you put in to creating it and the care we have taken to preserve and utilize it. Was I mistaken, My Lord?”
“No.” he answers immediately. He is contemplating the situation now, readjusting the information he had been given, she can see it. Perhaps she could get out of this entirely by dropping the right piece of information…?
She drops into a more formal bow, answering the questions of the event as he poses them to her, and subtly weaving in the offenders connection to a known traitor to the conversation, before she is dismissed.
By the end of the week, the offender has been killed. Apparently they had been selling secrets, and Devotion is commended for her continued loyalty to Lord Elgar'nan.
Perhaps this would be a suitable space for her within his ranks, she wonders. Ferreting out those who are not so devoted as they should be.
It is several more centuries of footwork before she is moved into that particular position, officially. He changes her name, changes her into Selene, in yet another effort to appease his wife. Some sort of moon related name, to make her appear more theirs than his. The Lady Mythal seems to be wary of Devotions shift into a soldier.
Selene thinks she is right to be wary, but keeps that particular thought tightly locked away.
She is still loyal to her Lord, still obeys his commands without question and ferrets out those whose loyalty needs to be taken into question. She goes where he sends her, and returns without complaint. She burns, and she takes vengeance where it is due in her quest to keep the people safe from outside threats.
She is a good soldier.
She reminds herself of that each time she has doubts. Writes them down, and burns the parchment.
Devotion does not doubt.
Then time passes, and Selene begins to wonder if she should. When she watches as people are killed, some of the slaughtered those who are loyal, who have done nothing truly wrong. It is not her place to judge. But there are times she wonders why it is their place.
Perhaps she needs another new perspective.
She approaches Sympathy, for advice on how to approach their Lord. Sympathy sighs and hugs Selene, and Selene does not burn them because it feels nice and she quite likes Sympathy besides. They tell her to wait until after their time together to approach him.
So she waits.
And when she asks Lord Elgar'nan if she might be permitted a change in scenery, he obliges.
Selene makes a mental note to approach Sympathy more often in the future.
He offers her leave, to take time away from her service but she is not entirely sure what she would even do without her duties. She politely requests to stay in his services, merely to be positioned somewhere else for a time, so that she may better serve him upon her return.
He agrees that the experience could be beneficial, and offers her a position to join away team he has been forming to keep an eye on his sons territories. The Lord Dirthamen.
She has seen him in passing, she supposes. As much as one can see him, beneath his cloak and his masks and the various rumors surrounding his activities and preferences.
Apparently, Elgar'nan has similar concerns. He is not entirely certain what is happening within his sons territory, and that unsettles him. Selene’s experience in seeing precisely where peoples loyalties lie should serve her well in his lands. She will remain there on a trial period, for only a decade, before returning. At that time, they will reassess where she will be best suited for a more permanent position, and if this particular itch for travel and change has been sufficiently satisfied.
She accepts, and leaves with the sun in the morning.