The first time she read from the broken and frayed book was on a whim; a very depressed whim. Her best friend was into magic, spells, and general other world theories. She’d told her the small book was genuine, that it’d summon a demon to do her bidding, but at a cost. Of course the cost was always different, depending on the demon. She didn’t believe in demons or magic, but it had been years and she was desperate. Years since she’d been touched, kissed, and or wanted by another human being.
She had been drunk, sipping whiskey alone in her one bedroom apartment on New Year’s Eve. She was the only one she knew spending the festivities alone. It was her own decision to stay in, but it was based on previous experience. Who wanted to go out and be the only person not getting a kiss at midnight? She had never been confident with herself or her slightly larger than average body and she didn’t need a room of strangers kissing everyone but her to remind her of that. So she watched romance movies all night while going through the brand new bottle of Jack her bestie had gifted her with at Christmas. She was halfway through when the small faded grey book had caught her eye.
“What the hell.” She’d immediately known it was fake when it required no drawings on the floor or sacrifices. Simply a few sentences in Latin which she barely slurred through and a prick of her finger. She barely felt the needle pierce her skin as she leaned back against her headboard and waited. She lasted nearly 10 minutes before she was laughing to herself. The laugh turned into a wretched sob, her tears sprouting forth like a river. She pressed her palms against her eyes as she wept, her body jerking with emotion. She was alone. So very alone. She just wanted to feel someone, anyone. She wanted to be touched, to know someone wanted to touch her body, to feel wanted.
The baritone that filled the room was loud, booming to the point that she yelped and covered her ears in surprise, her tears forgotten as she looked around the room, not seeing anything. She blinked rapidly for a few seconds as she held her breath, waiting, listening.
“I must be losing my mind.”
“No. Pathetic, but not crazy.”
The voice seemed to come from every corner of her room, her eyes frantically searching for any movement as her heart hammered in her chest.
“Pathetic and stupid.”
The tone of the voice was softer now, but full of irritation, the sound hitting her nerves, frustration and anger taking over her fear as she grit her teeth.
“Better than a coward who stays hidden.”
The voice was silent for a moment before a dark chuckle rolled over her body, the sound making her shiver.
“If I came out you’d die from shock little kitten, so keep your claws to yourself before it angers me.”
Her eyes went to the small book on the end of her bed, her mind immediately running at the possible implications.
“Ahhhh it seems the kitten isn’t completely stupid. That’s right. Think it through.”
She shook her head, “That’s impossible.”
The voice seemed to be circling her as it spoke, “Yet here I am. And we’ve established you aren’t crazy.”
She snorted and looked to her left into darkness, “And I’m supposed to believe the voice from the shadows? That sounds crazy to me.”
That laugh again, rolling down her spine, the voice to the front of her now, “Feisty kitten. I assumed this would be boring as I saw your pathetic display when I arrived, but maybe…”
“That’s called crying. Do voices not cry?”
“Only humans cry, kitten. Do you think I am human?”
She looked back at the grey book, the voice behind her now almost directly in her ear.
“No lies now kitten.”
She whispered, her anger and bravery quickly fleeing, “No.”
Hot breath hit her ear making her jerk as a warm breeze drifted down her arms, “Good kitten.”
“Why are you here?”
The breeze left as the voice moved to her right, exasperation lacing it’s tone, “Don’t go back to stupid, it’s boring.”
She squeezed her eyes shut, her brain desperately trying to make sense of what was happening. Maybe it was a dream. She had drunk so much tonight. Maybe she’d passed out and her mind was picking up where her stupid drunken actions with the book had left off.
“Ahhh kitten don’t act as if you didn’t do this. Don’t blame that tiny brain of yours. You know you’re not that imaginative to think of something like me.”
She was shaking, her eyes still closed, “It’s impossible. You’re…not possible.”
A deep growl hit her right ear, “I’m over this. Open your eyes.”
She shook her head, her lower lip trembling as an immense presence filled the room, warm steady breath coming from in front of her.
The voice was louder now, “I said, Open. Your. Eyes. Now.”
Her eyelids rose as if forced, her head tilted back by a firm breeze, her lips parting as she gasped at the creature before her. He was massive, he’s head only a foot from her ceiling. He was black, almost as if a shadow, his body seeming to shimmer and shift yet somehow stay whole. He had large horns, two on each side of his head, one set pointing forward and the other pointing up. He had a skull like face with glowing orbs of fire as eyes. She shivered as her eyes traveled down past his mouth, sharp teeth peeking out behind black lips as a thick, snake like tongue flicked past them. His body was massive and solid, the most built specimen she’d ever laid eyes on. Her mouth went dry. Flicks of red and orange were sporadically shimmering over his body, the flecks becoming brighter where ever her eyes traveled. She looked down his arms to his hands, his claws seeming to twinkle at her. She gave his waist a quick glance, only noticing it was flat, before looking at his massively clawed feet and the long set of twin tails resting on the ground next to them. Her eyes traveled up the figure again, her brain trying to process what was before her.
“Now that your eyes are satisfied kitten, tell me what you want.”
His lips didn’t move as he spoke, his voice still filling the room around her. She couldn’t stop looking at his mouth, her own still gaping open with shock. All at once he disappeared into a wisp of smoke, one of his hands cupping her throat from behind as his voice was in her ear again.
“Try to speak kitten, I have very little patience.”
He growled in frustration, his free hand held out in front of her, his palm up, “Let’s do this the easy way then.”
Her eyes got big as a vision filled the room before her. It was her, just twenty minutes ago as she said the few sentences of Latin.
“Tell me now kitten, this is your last chance.”
Her body got tense as she watched herself, her thoughts and voice filling the room around them from the past. I just want someone, anyone, please…
The vision faded as she hung her head, the pressure on her throat getting tighter as she leaned into the hand, feeling the scratch of the claws against her skin.
Her voice was so quiet she knew a human wouldn’t be able to hear her, but he could of course. He stayed silent for a moment longer than she expected. His fingers moved up to her jaw, cupping it and tilting her head back, her eyes closed with shame.
“Is that what you want kitten? Me to touch you?”
She bit her lip, tears falling from the corner of her eyes as she felt his warm breath on her face. She thought of her last boyfriend, of him telling her she wasn’t good enough anymore. She thought of the numerous guys at college that had felt her up, laughing to their friends afterwards, mocking each other for being “chubby chasers.” She thought of her father telling her no one would ever want a fat girl. She thought of all the nights she’d stayed inside, feeling alone while her friends went out to dance the night away. She’d been so afraid no one would want to dance with her. All she wanted was to be touched, to be wanted, to experience something outside of the hate and pain of her real world.
She slowly opened her eyes, meeting the fiery orbs of the demon behind her, her voice still silent but unwavering as she spoke, “Yes. Please. Touch me.”
The demon stared down at her in silence before his voice filled her head again, this time it was noticeably softer, but laced with a low growl, “There is a price.”
The growl was louder now as the demon’s thumb slowly traveled down the front of her throat, the action making her head tilt back more as she bit her lip.
“Tell me kitten. Tell me exactly how much to touch you.”
She stared up at him again, her eyes traveling down to his lips, his tongue flicking out at her gaze. She looked back up into his eyes, hers dark with building desire.
“Until I beg you to stop.”
The demon moved in a wave over her, his body seeming to touch every inch of her skin, one hand sliding under her shirt as the other delved between her legs. He wasn’t slow and he didn’t ease her into his touch. He growled into her ear as her back arched hard, her fingers digging into his arms as her body felt like fire.
“I’ll give you even more than that kitten.”