Summer of 61'
The candy shop was filled with people, but only one caught Sam’s eye. A short older man, well built dirty blonde hair. And his eyes. You can get lost in them for hours. Sam scanned over the leather jacket he wore, almost drooling all over the candy. “Sam.. Earth to Sammy.” Charlie Bradbury giggled, waving a pack of m&ms in front of Sam’s face. Sam diverted his eyes to the candy, ignoring the commotion around them. His heart was beating out if his chest. Licking his lips with his tongue, he replied. “Hmm. What Charlie?” He asked peeking another look at the handsome stranger. Drool began to dribble down his mouth. Damn. This stranger was so captivating. “Well. Before you were checking out that hot guy over there…. “ Sam slapped a hand over her mouth. Terror struck his stomach. “Someone may hear you!” Sam snapped.
Glancing nervously around them. No one turned around, let alone bellow about their chat.
Charlie removed Sam’s hand. “Sorry… “ She whimpered, glancing around them. The biker boy had already went away, which allowed Sam to breath normally. He turned his attention back to Charlie. “Its okay… now what were you trying to ask? “ Sam bit down on his bottom lip. His nerves and anxiety were starting to make him shaky. Charlie smiled up at him, her red hair offsetting her eyes. “Which should I get? M&Ms, or these?” She picked up a package of candy that Sam had never seen before. He raised an eyebrow at the second one. What was it? He didn't know, and it didn't look editable. “I'd stick to M&Ms.” He laughed. After grabbing their candy, they headed outside. Even though he'd probably chunk it away, and eat a salad, he tagged alone with Charlie to the store. He groaned, as he stretched out his muscles, his sweater riding up around his stomach. “So… want to hit the library?” Charlie asked rummaging through her bag.
Sam ignores his best friend for a moment, as he catches a glimpse of the biker. He sat on the seat of his bike, leaning over the handle bars with a lit cigarette. Sams mouth fell back open. His eyes caught Sam’s, for a moment both stare. “Sam… Are you even listening? “ Charlie looked up from her bag, following Sam's eyes. She pursed her lips. “Oh.” She smirked, knowing what exactly caught Sams attention.
A car horn blasted near from an oncoming car, bursting Sam's bubble. “What?” He blurted, glancing back at Charlie with a shaky voice. "Go and talk to him.. “ Charlie nudges Sam' shoulder. Her grin sliding into a smile. “Charlie… I.. I don’t even know if he’s.. You know…. “
“You don’t know if you never try… Go on. I’ll meet you back at the library.” She turns on her heel, smoothing down her skirt before going. She walks throw the busy crowd that overwelmed the sidewalk. "See yah Sammy.” She hollers over her shoulder, throwing up a hand.
“See yah.” He whispers to mostly himself. Moving out of the way for someone to enter the shop, he takes a couple of steps towards the biker. His guts twisting into a knot. And his anxiety making his chest heave, and his heart beat fast, he sighed as he grew closer.
Another horn blades, and screams of curse words erupt the sidewalk and the street.
He catches his eyes as he steps in beside the bike. Sam watches as he takes a long drag from his cigarette, never moving an inch.
“Do I know you?” The man sits up straight, holding the cigarette in between his lips. He placed his hands on the handle bars, watching Sam’s every move. “No.” Sam stayed bluntly. The world around them suddenly melted away, it was just them two at least to Sam.
" Well.. Why were you staring at me just now? “ He pulls the cigarette from his mouth.
Beads of sweat spreads across Sam's forehead. “I.. I.. “ He mumbles. The biker raises an eyebrow. “Lets go somewhere to talk. Hop on.” Sam watches as he throws his cigarette onto the ground, crushing it with the bottom of his boot. “I. I can’t. Uhm… “
“Get on. Now.” He snaps. Sam walked closer to the bike. Swinging his leg over the back, his stomach knotted. “Ready?” Sam nodded in reply. Kicking down the kickstand, he fired up the engine. Giving Sam no warning on when he was taking off. Sam threw his arms around the bikers stomach, clutching him tight. “Its not that bad!” He yells over the roar of the engine.
Sam didn't reply, instead he concentrated on his heartbeats. The drive seemed to take forever, but Sam didn't mind. He finally stopped at an abandoned building on the edge of town. Sam's mind went to this stranger beating him bloody behind the ally, making his stomach twist tighter.
Sam released his grasp from the mans waist, watching as he slid off the bike. Sam followed, making sure to stand away. The man turned to face Sam, his bright golden eyes staring back at him.
"My names Gabriel." He stepped closer to Sam, their lips daring to touch. "S-Sam." He muttered, staring at Gabriel's lips. "Well. Sam." Gabriel stepped closer, pressing a knee into Sam's crotch.
Sam breathed heavily, his eyes still focused on Gabe's lips. Gabriel leaned in close, a hand slipping into Sam's pants. Licking his lips, Gabriel pressed his body cautiously against Sam's.
"Wanna fool around?" Gabriel whispered against Sam's ear. Sam found himself nodding, and the one who was taking control. What was he doing?! He pushed Gabriel backwards onto the hard ground. "Easy there kiddo." Gabriel grinned.
Sam sat on Gabe's lap. "You can't tell anyone this.... " Sam muttered staring down at Gabriel. "Cross my heart." He grinned like the devil.
Sam had a bad feeling. And the feeling was getting worse.
He caught Gabe's lips with his, using his hands to navigate his pants.
The roar of an engine made Sam jump. "Someone's coming."
"Nah. Its fine... Shit." Gabriel pushed Sam off, as a car barreled down the gravel road. Sam jumped up, yanking his pants up. "Sorry... But I got to bolt." Gabriel jumped onto his bike, kicking the stand down.
"What about me?"
His voice made him sound like a little school boy wining to his mom about being told to stay home.
"Sorry kiddo. Meet me at the cafe... Lisa's. Meet me there at six in the morning tomorrow." Gabriel sped off before Sam could get a word in edgewise. "Fuck me... " He whispered, recognizing the car.
His dads 1957 range rover.
He watched as John Winchester exited the car, his fist balled up and ready. Sam knew what was coming next. He braced himself for the first hit, and all that came after that.
Going to his happy place in his mind. He barley felt the pain surging through his body.
Not until it was done.
After John was finsihed, he left him there beaten and bloody. Tears didn't spill, he wouldn't let them. But the pain was excruciating, he couldn't concentrate on his happy place. It disappeared as he sat up.
He watched his dad drive away, leaving him alone and scared.
Sam laid on his bed, face down in the pillows. The blanket had been thrown onto the floor, his legs sprawled out. He ignored the noise of his brother entering the room, and his sitting on the edge of the bed. It dipped under his weight, as he leaned a arm out "Sammy... " Dean shook Sam's leg gently. "Come stay with me and Lisa... "
His voice was deep, ridden with emotion.
"No." Sam muffled into the pillows. He burried his hands underneath it, clenching them together. "Come on.. It'll be okay.. You'll go to college in the fall, you'll become a lawyer. You'll get what you always wanted.. Come on. Just for a couple of days then.. Sam.. "
Dean whispered, his heart ached for his brother.
Sam turned onto his back, his swollen cheek revealing itself. "I'm going to kill him... " Dean mumbled, reaching a hand out towards Sam's face. And who knows he probably would, if he was given the chance. "Don't.. " Sam snapped, shooing the hand away.
Dean dropped his hand, placing it on the bed. He lifted his right leg onto the bed, and let the left dangle. His plaid over shirt hung loosely around his body.
Sam shook his head, mentally beating himself for not being like his brother.
"Just for a couple of days... Let's get you packed. " Dean stood from the bed, the mattress regained its original form. Sam watched as Dean walked over to the closet, swinging open its doors. He nodded, and joined his brother. "Dean.. Do you.. Know.. Care that I'm gay...?"
His voice was filled with sadness. And worry. Fiddling with his hands, Sam played with the door of the closet.
He decided to be grabbing a couple of books from his dresser instead of standing around. Stuffing them into a bag, he turned back to Dean, who finally answered "Not at all. Why is it my business who you want to sleep with?" He shrugged, grabbing shirts from their hangers, and pushing them into a duffle bag. "Just asking... " Sam mumbled, grabbing a picture of their mom off of the nightstand.
"Do you remember her....?" Sam sat on the edge of the bed, photo in hand. Her death never impacted him, since it happened when he was a baby. A bad house fire.. She got caught up in it.. No way out. "Yeah... Somewhat.. " Dean dropped a shirt into the bag, and turned towards Sam. His little brother reminded him of their mom, sometimes too much. "Come on let's get out of here before he returns from Bobby's."
He stated, pulling the bag up and over his shoulders.
Sam nodded, and continued to pack. After zipping up the bags, the wondered out of the room, closing the door behind them. Sam felt a pang of guilt, and freedom as they walked out the front door. He didn't bother to say final goodbyes as most would've done. No need. "Thank you Dean... " He mutters as they throw the bags into the bed of Deans pickup. "No problem Sammy. We're family."
Dean flashed a smile, slamming the tailgate close. He slapped the bed frame, and wondered over to the drivers door.
Sam nodded, and made his way to his side.
"So.... " Dean muttered, once inside the cab. He started the engine up, listening to it pur. "Tell me about the guy."
He stated, pulling out onto the road.
Sam felt his cheeks grow hot, as he buckled the seat belt. "There's nothing much to tell... " He replies leaning his head against the cool glass. Dean shrugged, and glanced at his brother. "Suit yourself ... " He flipped on the radio, an old song of the Rolling Stones blasting.
They drove listening to the music, not talking much. Sam's mind drifted to Gabriel.. His touches... His eyes.. Those lips. He found himself drifting off to sleep.
His happy place.. Turning into nightmares.. Nightmares that were just beginning.