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Devil's Home

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> Gerard Way has started a chat! <

> Gerard Way has changed his name to gee spot! <

> gee spot has named the chat Devil's Home! <

> gee spot has invited Frank Iero, Mikey Way, Brendon Urie, and Josh Dun  to the chat! < 

 

gee spot: hi fuckers

Frank Iero has joined the chat! <

Frank Iero: why tf am i here 

gee spot: youre here in hell! 

Frank Iero: yes ik but rlly why 

Mikey Way has joined the chat! <

Mikey Way: y are we here

gee spot: srsly u guys are no fun 

> Brendon Urie  has joined the chat! <

Brendon Urie: WHASSUP DICKHEADS

gee spot: hai brend

> Brendon Urie has changed his name to Satan! <

Satan: hello my fren 

Mikey Way: *friend

> Satan has changed Mikey Way's name to dis bich no fun! <

dis bich no fun: fuck u 

Satan: fuck me

Frank Iero: now now thats just gross stfu

> gee spot has changed Frank Iero's name to no ur gross! <

no ur gross: fucker

gee spot: im not sorry 

Josh Dun has joined the chat! <

Josh Dun: wtf is this

Satan: hell ofc 

dis bich no fun: leave while u still can

Josh Dun: o idk this looks interesting

no ur gross: ITS NOT ITS FUCKING HELL 

Satan: well now ur here lets change it up shall we

no ur gross: NO

> Satan has changed Josh Dun's name to dunwiththistrash! < 

dunwiththistrash: its not that bad

dis bich no fun: are u sure abt tht 

gee spot: guess who we all r

dunwiththistrash: dis bich no fun is mikey cuz hes just no fun anyways

Satan: YES PREACH

dis bich no fun: fuck u

dunwiththistrash: gee spot is gee like could this b more obvious and Satan is brend

dunwiththistrash: and idek who no ur gross is 

gee spot: frank

dis bich no fun: fronk

no ur gross: fuck u all 

no ur gross: dun i cant believe ur going with this shit 

dunwiththistrash: can i invite a friend?

Satan: k

> dunwiththistrash has invited Tyler Joseph to the chat! <

< Tyler Joseph joined the chat! <

Tyler Joseph: wtf 

> dunwiththistrash has changed Tyler Joseph's name to tyguy!< 

tyguy: josh?? 

dunwiththistrash: yusssss

no ur gross: leave while u still can this is hell

Satan: no 

Satan: stay 

tyguy: um idk whats happening but im staying for it

no ur gross: fuck u!!

gee spot: fuck ME 

no ur gross: no ur gross

> gee spot has changed no ur gross' name to i should fuck gee! <

i should fuck gee: no way in hell

tyguy: lol

Satan: awwwe i ship it 

i should fuck gee: NO! DO NOT SHIP THIS THIS IS NOT A THING

> gee spot has shared a photo file. Click to open. <

dunwiththistrash: is this srsly what i think it is

tyguy: is this frank blowing gee

Satan: holy fuck THIS BE GAY

dis bich no fun: so it wasnt gay before?

Satan: yeah it was but rlly frank the bathroom

i should fuck gee: yeah i mean you want me to blow him in the living room on the couch?

dunwiththistrash: i mean it'd be great comedy and blackmail material

i should fuck gee: dick

Chapter Text

> Satan invited Ray Toro, and Dallon Weekes to the chat! <


> Ray Toro has joined the chat! <

 

> Dallon Weekes has joined the chat! <



Satan: hi and welcome to hell 


Ray toro: what the actual fuck


Dallon Weekes: what is this


Satan: hell duh

Ray Toro: well we know that but I
really


Satan: this group chat I made


Dallon Weekes: and who's i


Satan: b

Satan: brendon u no?


Dallon Weekes: o ok 

 


Ray Toro: do I not get a nickname? everyone else seems to have 1


> Satan has changed Ray Toro's name to afroboi! <


Afroboi: afroboi!?!!?????? Wtf b 


Satan: no I'm satan 


Afroboi: fuck u


Afroboi: well if I get a name Dallon gets one too


>> afroboi has changed Dallon Weekes' name to crybaby!


crybaby: wtf 


afroboi: can I invite some friends


Satan: yh who

 

afroboi: Pete and Patrick 


Satan: k


>> afroboi has invited Pete Wentz and Patrick Stump to the chat! 


Pete Wentz: HI FUCKERS 


Patrick Stump: what is this


>> afroboi has changed Patrick Stump's name to confused! 


Confused: youre right 


>>Confused has changed Pete Wentz's name to bleach boi


Bleach boi: were you referring to my "drink bleach" joke


Confused: idek 

bleach boi: o ok 


Satan: STFU AND KISS ALREADY COME TF ON


confused: ...


Satan: WE ARE WAITINGGG 


>>dunwiththistrash, dis bich no fun, I should fuck gee, and gee spot joined the chat! 


Gee spot: u fuckers started without me?!? Wtf 


Confused: they invited me and pete too 

gee spot: brendon u fUcKeR

dis bich no fun: BRENDON YOU FUCKER

Satan: sorry :'( 

Satan: but srsly wht do u hav against pete n pat?

dis bich no fun: NOTHING JUST WARN ME FIRST JESUS

bleach boi: AS I WAS SAYING

bleach boi: also hi mikey :)

dis bich no fun: stfu pete

bleach boi :((( ok

crybaby: u were saying anything?? 

bleach boi: stfu dallon

afroboi: lmao 

confused: just let him talk

bleach boi: THANK YOU

bleach boi: as i was saying or rather b was saying 

Satan: yeah u guys are cute together i mean the king of emo and the french foren exchange student wat cld go wrong

dis bich no fun: foren

dunwiththistrash: F O R E N

i should fuck gee: *foreign

Satan: whatever theyre cute and they should get together

gee spot: um kiung of emo? kiss my aSS pete u ware too much eyeliner anywayas

bleach boi: so many spelling mistake

gee spot: stfu pete 

bleach boi: so many

gee spot: OML STFU PETE LET ME FUCKING TALK

Afroboi: yeah pete

bleach boi: excuse me who fucking asked you bush head

> Satan changed Afroboi's name to bush head! < 

bush head: wow

bush head: wheres dallon

crybaby: here

Satan: oh hi 

afroboi: DALLON JUST STOOD UP AND SHOUTED "IM ON THE INTERNET" RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ENGLISH 

afroboi: AND THEN SAT BACK DOWN 

afroboi: AND THEN MIKEY GOT UP AND YELLED ME TOO AND THREW HIS BOOK OUT THE WINDOW

Satan: holy shit 

crybaby: hey at least ms davis didnt take my phone

dis bich no fun: the book was boring

dis bich no fun: it was the catcher in the rye 

 

confused: UM THATS A REALLY GOOD BOOK

dis bich no fun: the hell it is its boring af

gee spot: ur boring af

dunwiththistrash: ur boring af

gee spot: UR GAY AF

Satan: we all are gay af

bleach boi: are u sure abt that

Satan: UR FUCKING GAY AS SHIT

bleach boi: no i mean

bleach boi: hang on 

> bleach boi has removed and silenced confused from the chat! <

crybaby: wtf pete

bleach boi: well i wanted to tell u guys in person but u know awkward n shit

bush head: k

dis bich no fun: do go on

bleach boi: ik were all pat's friends but i wanted to see if it was ok by u guys 2

bleach boi: i like patrick and i really want to go out 

>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!

Satan: CAN I PICK THEM OR CAN I PICK THEM

gee spot: you cant pick em

crybaby: oof 

afroboi: is everyone going to ignore that mikey just left? 

Satan: YEs

Satan: PETERICK CONFIRMED

Satan: now delete these messages so my boi 'trick doesn't find out ;)))))

 

Chapter Text

> dis bich no fun, tyguy, dunwiththistrash, Satan, i should fuck gee, crybaby, bush head, gee spot, confused and bleach boi joined the chat! <

crybaby: wow everyones here at the same time this is weird

Satan: its AWESOME!!!!

dis bich no fun: im in lunch detention

bush head: why?

dis bich no fun: I THREW MY FUCKING BOOK OUT THE WINDOW DICKHEAD 

gee spot: damn calm down

bush head: yeah as far as i know my head is a bush not a dick 

dis bich no fun: fuck u 

> dis bich no fun has changed bush head's name to dickhead! < 

dickhead: youre really funny mikey 

dis bich no fun: ikr 

Satan: it said dallon joined whrere is he

dunwiththistrash: whrere isnt a word

Satan: STFU JOSH UR NOT MY SPELLCHECKER

crybaby: its * where *

crybaby: and im right here

Satan: o hi 

tyguy: fuck this 

dunwiththistrash: wat? 

tyguy: im in math and its terrible

tyguy: so im leaving 

dickhead: ty did u just srsly walk right out 

tyguy: well i said i was leaving

dickhead: shes sending pete after u 

tyguy: shit

bleach boi: TYLER GET THE FUCK BACK HERE

tyguy: nO

bleach boi: WHY THO 

tyguy: MATH SUCKS AND IM NOT GOING BACK

confused: where are you???

tyguy: bathroom

dunwiththistrash: WHY WOULD YOU TELL HIM THAT NOW PETE KNOWS

tyguy: sHiT

tyguy: I LIED IM IN THE CAFETERIA

bleach boi: bathroom it is

tyguy: fuck off pete

bleach boi: nononono

dis bich no fun: ha

bleach boi: PATRICK HELP ME

confused: IM IN STUDY HALL

bleach boi: shit

bleach boi: MIKEY HELP ME

dis bich no fun: IM IN DETENTION YOU ASS

bleach boi: whatever im going back to class ill tell davis i couldn't find him 

tyguy: hi its josh on ty's phone

dunwiththistrash: hi its ty on josh's phone

gee spot: hi its gee on frank's dick

dis bich no fun: WHOA WHOA WHOA

bleach boi: GONE SEXUAL 

dickhead: GONE SMEXUAL

crybaby: WTF IS SMEXUAL 

Satan: me

crybaby: stfu brendon srsly 

Satan: no sorry

dickhead: wish i was sitting on frank's dick

gee spot: FRANK IS MINE

i should fuck gee: dont i get a say in this

gee spot: NO

dickhead: ctfo i was joking

dickhead: i want pete's dick

bleach boi: EXCUSE ME

tyguy: ok i got my phone back 

dunwiththistrash: I FOUDN MIKEYS BOOK

crybaby: foudn? no its *found* my child

dunwiththistrash: STFU ITS IN THE COURTYARD

Satan: its mine now im coming

dis bich no fun: DONT U FUCKING DARE ITS MINE

Satan: awwww

Chapter Text

>> Satan and gee spot have joined the chat! 

 


gee spot: hey b


Satan: HI BITCH


gee spot: wow hi


gee spot: look it's almost October which means 


Satan: SPOOK SEASON 


Satan: SPOOK SEASON MY BOIZZZZZ


gee spot: spook season yes you are correct


Satan: does that mean scaring the fuck out of some little kids


gee spot: perhaps


Satan: YESSSSSSSSS BOIIIIIIIIIIIIII 


gee spot: YESSSSSSSSSS BOIIIIIIIIII 


Satan: so Mikey 


Satan: is he doing his haunted house this year? 


gee spot: he better be or I stg will break his tiny ass


Satan: and I will help you 

>> I should fuck gee has joined the chat!

I should fuck gee: WHASSUP BITCHES IT BE SPOOKP SEASON


gee spot: excuse me SPOOKP 


Satan: oof frank 

>> gee spot has changed I should fuck gee's name to spookp season!

Spookp season: dandy gerard 


Gee spot: np love <333 


Satan: so spook season and Mikey's haunted house 


Gee spot: yea so Mikey says he wants to have it be like an asylum themed thing you know? 


Spookp season: MAYBE WE SHOULD FUCKING ASK MIKEY 

>>Spookp season has invited dis bich no fun to the chat! 

dis bich no fun: w a t do you fuckin want you duck 


Gee spot: you duck 


dis bich no fun: u duck 

>>spookp season has changes gee spot's name to u duck! 

U duck: U FUCKING DUCK 


Spookp season: yea that's me


>> dunwiththistrash and bandit0 have joined the chat!

 

Dunwiththistrash: whoa Ty when did u change ur name


bandit0: ;))) you'll never know


Satan: READ THE SHIT ABOVE BC ITS IMPORTANT FOR SPOOK SEASON 


Spookp season: yea hence my name lmao 


bandit0:... Mikey has a haunted house??


Dunwiththistrash: apparently yes 


dis bich no fun: YES I DO BITCH 


dunwiththistrash: damn ctfo 


Dis bich no fun: NO 

 

u duck: CLAM THE FIUCK DOWN JMIEKY WAY 

 

Satan: "jmieky"

 

Spookp season: "clam the fiuck down"

 

u duck: FUCK YOU ALL

 

dun with this trash :D :D :D :D :D 

 

bandit0: whats up josh 

 

>> dun with this trash has removed bandit0 from the chat!

 

Spookp season: whoa wtf did u do tht for

 

dunwiththistrash: look i wanna surprise ty for his bday

 

dunwiththistrash: its on monday

 

Satan: w a t 

 

Spookp season: thats a good idea i'll bring the booze

 

Satan: IVE GOT THE WEED

 

dunwiththistrash: um ok well there goes my cake plan

 

U duck: NO STILL BRING CAKE

 

dunwiththistrash: i guess it would b more fun with cake :) 

 

Satan: YOU ARE CORRECT MY SON 

 

dunwiththistrash: now delete these messages we dont want ty seeing them

 

dunwiththistrash: its supposed to b a surprise 

 

dis bich no fun: k gotchu 

 

>> Spookp season invited bandit0 to the chat! 

 

bandit0: y did u remove me josh :((((((((

 

dunwiththistrash: sorry 

 

bandit0: its ok i forgive u 

 

u duck: ...

 

Satan: THAT WAS SO FUCKING PURE

 

dis bich no fun: stfu brendon

 

 

 

Chapter Text

>> bleach boi has created a new chat!

>> bleach boi has invited dis bich no fun to the chat! 

dis bich no fun: oh hi pete 

dis bich no fun: bye pete

>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!

bleach boi: aw hell no youre getting back here bitch 

>> bleach boi has invited dis bich no fun to the chat! 

>> bleach boi has changed the chat settings! 

dis bich no fun: i cant fucking leave wtf pete

bleach boi: we need to talk

dis bich no fun: about what? we have nothing to say to each other. 

bleach boi: thats a lie and you know it mikey 

dis bich no fun: pete lets just not 

bleach boi: i just need you to be decent to patrick 

dis bich no fun: i dont have problems with patrick hes my friend

dis bich no fun: youre what i have an issue with 

bleach boi: i said i was sorry what more do i have to say!? 

dis bich no fun: sorry doesnt fucking cut it pete wentz and you fucking know it now change the goddamn settings so i can leave

bleach boi: ok :( 

dis bich no fun: fuck u fuck ur life fuck your fucking cow i dont care anymore just leave me alone now goodbye 

>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!

bleach boi: bye mikey

bleach boi: i just didnt tell you i still love you 

>> bleach boi has left the chat! 

Chapter Text

bandit0: WHAT THE FUCK JOSH 

Satan: wHOA TYJOS MAKING A SCENE

dis bich no fun: o fuck what happened ty

dunwiththistrash: i didnt mean it!!!!!!! 

bandit0: tHIS BITCH 

bandit0: THIS BITCH SAID DEPRESSION ISNT AS BAD AS PPL MAKE IT OUT TO BE

Confused: no no no no why would you say that josh!!! 

dunwiththistrash: i wAS TRYING TO SAY SOME PEOPLE ARE OVERDRAMATIC ABOUT IT WHEN THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THE REAL THING 

Confused: BUT THAT'S NOT THE WAY YOU SAY IT

>> U duck, Spookp season, and bleach boi have joined the chat!

U duck: just read the messages

U duck: and wtf josh

bandit0: YOU KNOW I USED TO B ANOREXIC AND DEPRESSED AND YOU DONT KNOW HOW BAD IT IS

bandit0: ITS JUST NOT SOMETHING U JOKE ABOUT 

bandit0: you know what I'm so done 

>> bandit0 has left the chat!

Spookp season: wtf

>> crybaby and dickhead have joined the chat!

crybaby: fUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW

Satan: OMG BITCH ME TOO

dickhead: WTF

bleach boi: i turn off my phone for ONE MOTHERFUCKING MINUTE and we went to hell???

Satan: you have forgotten we are already in hell my child

bleach boi: ur not my child

>> bleach boi have changed Satan's name to my child!

my child: thought u said i wasnt ur child

bleach boi: not mine

bleach boi: mikeys

dis bich no fun: YOU FUCKER NO THIS INFIDEL IS NOT MY SOn

my child: wELL OKAY THEN THANKS DAD

crybaby: daddy ;)

dickhead: kinky 

U duck: nO 

U duck: NO KINKS NO KINKS FOR MIKEY NOPE NOPE NOPE

dis bich no fun: yeah pls no

bleach boi: pls

dis bich no fun: stfu pete no one asked u 

bleach boi: fuck you 

my child: fuck me ;))

my child: WAIT HOLD UP I HAVE AN ANOUNCHE MENT 

crybaby: wHAT SUPERB SPELLING

my child: OMF STFU DALLON THIS IS IMPORTANT 

my child: i just saw the most adorable boy in history walk into my class 

my child: OMF HIS NAME IS RYAN WTFFFFFFF

dunwiththistrash: o ryan hes in my math class 

my child: HE IS PERFECT

>> my child invited Ryan Ross to the chat!

>> crybaby has left the chat!

Ryan Ross: what is this and who are you

dunwiththistrash: ROLL CALL

bleach boi: pete wentz

Confused: patrick stump

dunwiththistrash: josh dun

dickhead: ray toro

dis bich no fun: mikey way

u duck: gerard way

Spookp season: frank iero 

my child: brendon urie :) 

dunwiththistrash: and tyler used to be here he was bandit0 

my child: where the fuck is dallon he was crybaby 

Ryan Ross: he left it looks like but srsly tho why am i here

Confused: read the messages from before

Ryan Ross: ....

Ryan Ross: ur all gey af

my child: wld u like to b gey with us ;))))))

Confused: OH MY FUCK BRENDON YOU DIDNT DELETE THE MESSAGES THAT WERE BASICALLY WORSHIPPING RYAN YOU FUCKASS

bleach boi: o fuk 

my child: O FUK 

my child: SORRY PLS DONT THINK IM CREEPY OR SHIT I JUST THINK YOU LOOK PRETTY OKAY PLS DONT HATE ME

Ryan Ross: i dont hate u 

my child: OH THANK GOD

dickhead: so we're all just gonna ignore the fact that dallon left okay

dickhead: hang on what about the party we said we were going to have 

U duck: o the one yesterday brendon said he was gonna bring weed to 

Spookp season: i suck dick for cocaine 

bleach boi: daddy ;)))))

U duck: NOPE NONE OF THAT THANK YOU 

>> Confused has removed bleach boi from the chat! 

U duck: damn pat u got to him first

Ryan Ross: he deserved it 

my child: O SHIT IM TELLING PETE HE JUST GOT CLAPBACKED BY THE NEW KID

my child: pete says fuk u 

Ryan Ross: tell pete to suck my dick

>> Confused has removed Ryan Ross from the chat!

Confused: NOPE

>> my child has added Ryan Ross to the chat!

my child: nO patrick we dont DO that here

Confused: >.< 

u duck: does this mean joshler is over

 

Chapter Text

Hi guys! This particular chapter isn't actually a chapter for the story, it's more like a P U B L I C  S E R V I C E 

A N N O U N C E M E N T. I wanted to give you guys my information for Wattpad and Tumblr

so you can find me there.

 

My Tumblr: https://psychedelicharlequin.tumblr.com/ 

My Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/the_on_crack_parade

Patrick Stump creating a song using GarageBand: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rLcAHVu5JU 

 

Annnnnd that's about it! The (official) seventh chapter of Devil's Home will be out

sometime this week. See ya!!

 

 

Chapter Text

Ryan Ross has invited Ray Toro, Dallon Weekes, Frank Iero, and Patrick Stump to the chat!

Ryan Ross: guys
Ryan Ross: GUYS WE NEED TO TALK
Frank Iero: wtf do you want ry
Ryan Ross: look so brendon from the main chat right
Dallon Weekes: oh we're talking abt brendon? Lol I'm out
Dallon Weekes has left the chat!
Ryan Ross: wtf?
Ray Toro: no uh uh mr Weekes get back here
Ray Toro has invited Dallon Weekes to the chat!
Patrick Stump: what the actual hell Dallon??
Dallon Weekes: would it surprise u that I don't want to talk abt it
Ray Toro: no now tell us
Dallon Weekes: no
Dallon Weekes has left the chat!
Ryan Ross: at this point it's prob useless to try and get him to join again
Patrick Stump: alright then what did u want to tell us?
Ryan Ross: well brendon from the main chat you know
Frank Iero: YES WE KNOW
Ryan Ross: ok well I read back through the texts u were warning me abt Patrick
Ryan Ross: and I think it's cute but how do I even respond to that
Frank Iero: ignore him?? that's what we all do
Ryan Ross: won't that get suspicious after awhile
Frank Iero: no
Frank Iero: let's get back to the main chat, they'll get suspicious

Chapter Text

my child: GUESS WHO I FUCKED LAST NIGHT

Confused: oh bremdom no 

bleach boi: CONDOM

>> U duck changed my child's name to CONDOM NO!

CONDOM NO: IM NOT EVEN MAD RLLY BUT SRSLY GUESS WHO I FUCKED

CONDOM NO: also dom ;))

Confused: if its ryan 

U duck: it IS

bleach boi: we all knew it was ryan 

dunwiththistrash: BRENDON ITS BEEN TWO DAYS AND U FUCKED RYAN ALREADY

CONDOM NO: hells yeah 

dunwiththistrash: hey pete 5 dollars brendons lying and he bottomed 

bleach boi: ur on 

U duck: #brendonbottomed2k18 

bleach boi: #brendonbottomed2k19 

CONDOM NO: no nO I DID NOT BOTTOM THAT IS INACCURATE 

CONDOM NO: also who told u that 

Ryan Ross: um  

dunwiththistrash: YOU NEED A NICKNAME SON 

>> dunwiththistrash changed Ryan Ross' name to this man totally tops goddamn and what a top!

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wtf josh 

CONDOM NO: nO i TOppEODP ! 

bleach boi: #stroke 

Confused: #stophashtagging 

Spookp season: ITS NEW YEARS EVE FUCKERS IMMA HAVE A LIT PARTY AT MY HOUSE BRING WEED 

CONDOM NO: hell yeah!! 

CONDOM NO: i will prove to you all that i top

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: he bottoms #brendonbottoms2k18 

CONDOM NO: WTF RYAN 

CONDOM NO: THIS IS BETRAYAL

Chapter Text

Confused: i texted tyler hes coming

dunwiththistrash: he is?? omg patrick thank you so much im gonna apologize and give him his birthday gift I forgot to give him 

CONDOM NO: yeah we had the cake... bUT DALLON DROPPED IT

bleach boi: wait dallons here?

crybaby: never left 

Confused: you literally did dallon 

dunwiththistrash: YOU FUCKING DROPPED THE CAKE I WILL STG KILL YOU ALL 

dickhead: now you know how we feel  

tricky rick: tru tru 

u duck: we should have classier nicknames 

Spookp season: i got this 

>> Spookp season has changed Confused's name to tricky rick! 

>> Spookp season change u duck's name to bae! 

>> Spookp season changed bleach boi's name to eyeliner boi! 

>> Spookp season changed crybaby's name to dal the pal! 

>> Spookp season changed dunwiththistrash's name to joosh! 

>> Spookp season changed dickhead's name to fro! 

>> Spookp season changed dis bich no fun's name to milky 

>> Spookp season changed their own name to frnk! 

tricky rick: wtf frank 

eyeliner boi: i'LL hAvE yOU KNOW THAT EYELINER IS VLAYSAS SDSAS SHIT 

fro: im sorry what was that 

dal the pal: stroke 

milky: NONE OF THOSE NAMES ARE CLASSY FRANK 

CONDOM NO: what abt me

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and me 

frnk: your names are classy already 

CONDOM NO: o ok 

tricky rick: CONDOM NO isnt classy 

bae: but this man totally tops goddamn and what a top is

CONDOM NO: I WILL REMIND YOU WE HAVE FUCKED TWO DAMN TIMES 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and we intend to do it again ;) 

joosh: so are you gay together or something

CONDOM NO: fuck buddies? 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idk lets go with that 

CONDOM NO: ok 

frnk: so whos bringing the alcohol its harder to get than weed 

bae: ill do it my dad has a stash of it in the basement

eyeliner boi: any vodka 

bae: hell yeah 

frnk: well then whos got the weed

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: who do you think

tricky rick: brendon 

bae: brendon

milky: brendon

CONDOM NO: brendon 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wtf b 

CONDOM NO: its true tho 

joosh: ok well then ill order pizza 

CONDOM NO: put it on my tab they know who i am 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: papa johns? 

CONDOM NO: daddy ;)) 

tricky rick: NO

milky: BLOCKED AND REPORTED 

 

Chapter Text

CONDOM NO: i have like four fuckin bags of weed 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: snack size? 

CONDOM NO: NO! fucking freezer bags

CONDOM NO: i had to suck off the weed dealer for the fourth one sorry ry 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: its ok b 

frnk: who is your weed dude anyway?

CONDOM NO: some guy named tre cool 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: sounds like a fake name 

CONDOM NO: it is 

bae: wait tre?? tre cool?

fro: yeah thats what he said 

bae: his boyfriend is mike dirnt

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: theyre gay together?? i thought billie was with tre 

CONDOM NO: lets fuckin ask him then

tricky rick: NO BRENDON 

>> CONDOM NO has invited bob the billder, mike dirt, and tree is very cool to the chat! 

tricky rick: NO WE HAVE ENOUGH PEOPLE BRENDON WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

CONDOM NO: stfu patrick HELLO WEED FRIENDS

tree is very cool! HELLO WEED BOY THANKS FOR THE BJ 

bob the billder: hELLO!!! 

mike dirt: billie pls calm down

bob the billder: nO 

eyeliner boi: BILLIE! TRE! MIKE! AYEEEEE

tree is very cool: AYEEEEEEEE

bob the billder: AYEEEEEEE

mike dirt: AYEEEEEEEEEE 

eyeliner boi: wait how u no who i am 

tree is very cool: eyeliner boi? 

mike dirt: who else could it be 

frnk: oOOF 

bae: gonna need some ice for that burn 

mike dirt: ty frank gerard ty 

frnk: wait how did u know

bob the billder: youre v obvious frank 

tree is very cool: and we can guess we have brains you know

frnk: oh they didn't explode from all the weed? huh 

tree is very cool: suck my fucking dick 

bae: UM NO I AM THE OWNER OF THE ONLY DICK HE CAN SUCK TYVM

tree very cool: calm sir i only suck billies dick

mike dirt: AND MINE EXCUSE ME 

tree very cool: oh fine you too 

milky: so are you a threesome 

mike dirt: polyamory 

eyeliner boi: THREESOME

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: THREESOME 

tree is very cool: if you want us at ur party i wanna hear you all say polyamory 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: threesome

mike dirt: not coming 

CONDOM NO: NO WAIT POLYAMORY 

joosh: polyamory 

bob the billder: thank you NOW THE REST OF YOU THOTS 

bae: fiiiine polyamory 

frnk: if gees doing it im doing it polyamory 

eyeliner boi: polyTHREESOMEamory 

bob the billder: close enough thx pete 

fro: polyamory 

milky: polyamory fiiiiine 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: OMFGS DOES IT MATTER

tree is very cool: yES IT MATTERS FUCKING SAY IT TYVM 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: fiiiine polyamory happy now?

mike dirt: yes 

Chapter Text

frnk: tonight's gonna be fun 

tree is very cool: well as long as brendon kept hold of that weed i gave him 

CONDOM NO: may have smoked some yesterday 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: fUCK BRENDON HOW MUCH 

CONDOM NO: a bag??? 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU FUCKASS 

tree is very cool: its ok i can always bring more 

dal the pal: niceee 

dal the pal: btw wheres billie 

eyeliner boi: sssSSSSUP SISTERS ITS PETE WENTZ 

frnk: nO FUCK OFF 

frnk: PATRICK WHY ARE YOU DATING THIS DUMBASS 

tricky rick: idek hes cute when hes not high which is maybe an hour a day 

eyeliner boi: tru tru 

mike dirt: hello i am here 

bob the billder: hE BROUGHT ME TOO WHASSUP MOTHERFUCKERS 

mike dirt: billie... 

mike dirt: pls calm down 

bob the billder: k mike 

tree is very cool: ANYWAYS 

tree is very cool: i just snorted powdered sugar 

tree is very cool: AND MY NOSE IS RUNNING LIKE OMF 

CONDOM NO: sounds lit can i come over? 

tree is very cool: pls do 

bob the billder: mike cant talk rn as he is fussing over tre 

tree is very cool: is nice 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: im sure 

CONDOM NO: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING ABOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP RYAN HMMMMMM 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: legit nothing at all 

dal the pal: wait. are you guys together or something? i didnt get a straight answer last time 

joosh: no hetero 

bob the billder: *gay answer you misspelled it dally my boy 

>> bob the billder has changed dal the pal's name to dally! 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idek really we fuck?? but thats about it 

CONDOM NO: yeah its kinda fuck buddies 

joosh: k 

dally: it doesnt make either of you triggered? 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: no y would it? 

dally: idk i never understood the whole fuck buddies thing 

Chapter Text

CONDOM NO: YO WHERE TF ARE YOU GUYS THE PARTY STARTS IN 10 

tricky rick: yeah, in ten so you can wait brendon 

CONDOM NO: pETE TALK SOME SENSE INTO YOUR BOYFRIEND I HAVE WEED TO SMOKE 

eyeliner boi: weed? sICK COME ON PATRICK 

tricky rick: PETE NO 

eyeliner boi: pETE YES 

tricky rick: fine we're coming brendon 

CONDOM NO: HELL YEAH 

CONDOM NO: RYAN WHERE ARE YOU 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: i am literally at your door rn bren 

CONDOM NO: its open 

tricky rick: we're here 

eyeliner boi: WE'RE HERE! 

tricky rick: yeah i just said that 

eyeliner boi: LETS GO THERES WEED IN THERE 

tricky rick: you fucking tripped wtf pete 

eyeliner boi: r00d 

tree is very cool: yEE IM COMING WITH MY BITCHES 

CONDOM NO: GOT ANY BOOZE?

tree is very cool: HELL YEAH 

mike dirt: pls stop yelling 

tree is very cool: nO 

bob the billder: YO YO YO IM AT BRENDONS WHERE ARE YOU FUCKERS 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: coming im picking up dallon 

CONDOM NO: CANT HE WALK WITH THOSE LONG ASS LEGGOS 

dally: no 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: cOME ON DALLON I WANNA GET HIGH 

dally: fine fine jesus ryan

bob the billder: yall sound like an old married couple 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: dALLON 

dally: WTF RYAN CALM DOWN IM FIXING MY HAIR

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU LOOK FINE LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: okay dallon finally got his ass in the car are yall there 

CONDOM NO: 'yall' 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: stfu hoe 

joosh: HELLO 

joosh: IM HERE BRENDON OPEN THE DOOR 

CONDOM NO: ITS OPEN 

joosh: NO ITS NOT 

joosh: I TRIED 

CONDOM NO: TRY NOW 

joosh: o ok thx 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WERE FINALLY HERE (DALLON) 

dally: stfu i want beer  

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WELL YOU WOULD HAVE HAD SOME WAY EARLIER IF YOU HAD MOVED YOUR ASS WHEN I SAID TO

dally: stfu i do what i want 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: dont fucking die 

tricky rick: nO PETE STOP BACKFLIPPING OFF STUFF 

eyeliner boi: NO FUCK U 

dally: i do what i want

Chapter Text

CONDOM NO: wheres frank and gee arent they here too 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idk havent heard from them 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: also how are you not shitfaced yet

CONDOM NO: this is dallon 

CONDOM NO: i lost my phone i think billie took it 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: billie 

bob the billder: yEshseshe 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: oooooh kay 

tree is very cool: yeah billies HAMMERED but im just hihg so 

joosh: "hihg"

tree is very cool: excuse me hooker did i ask u 

CONDOM NO: itbs brbendon dalon dstole mey bhone 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: hes shitfaced 

eyeliner boi: BRENDONE WERES THE WEEDE 

tricky rick: NO 

eyeliner boi: YESJ 

eyeliner boi: wait josh tyler is here for some rfukcin reason 

CONDOM NO: I HAVE IT 

>> this man totally tops goddamn and what a top has changed eyeliner boi's name to WEEDE! 

>> this man totally tops goddamn and what a top has changed CONDOM NO's name to brendone

WEEDE: fuk u ryan 

brendone: fuck me 

tricky rick: NOPE NO BYE BITCH 

>> tricky rick has removed brendone from the chat! 

WEEDE; thansk patrick 

tricky rick: <33

joosh: hes here waht do i doooo 

tricky rick: are you wasted 

joosh: no 

tricky rick: good 

mike dirt: biLLEI DONT TAKE MEY FOEN WHTF

bae: WHASSUP FUCKERS

frnk: hye bitches

WEEDE: HELLO FRENS 

frnk: pass the weed dude i want some too 

WEEDE: get brendon back here patrick 

tricky rick: uGHHHHHH

tricky rick: fine 

>> tricky rick has invited brendone to the chat! 

brendone: TRICKY RICK WAHSSUPPPPPP 

tricky rick: no pls

tricky rick: PETER LEWIS KINGSTON WENTZ THE THIRD WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU 

WEEDE: heErere 

tricky rick: pls dont b as shitfaced as i think you are

mike dirt: HE IS 

tricky rick: * sighs * 

tricky rick: FUCK 

bae: GUYS 

frnk: wht babe 

bae: GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN JOSH AND TYLER

tricky rick: nooo... 

frnk: OH SHIT THEYRE MAKING OUT HELL YEAH 

WEEDE: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

WEEDE: wait 

tricky rick: oh shit 

tree is very cool: GUESS WHO ELSE IS MAKING OUT 

mike dirt: NOT NOW TRE 

frnk: RYAN AND DALLON ARE MAKING OUT IN THE CORNER HOLY SHIT 

brendone: ...

brendone: well i have had a good life

Chapter Text

brendone: SO

Brendone: RYAN IS THERE ANYTHING YOUD LIKE TO SAY

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: yes I have a headache

dal the pal: sameeee

WEEDE: y'all made out last night

dis bich no fun: yALL

WEEDE: EAT MY ASS MUKEY

dis bich no fun: MUKEY WTF IS A MUKEY

>> tricky rick has changed dis bich no fun's name to mukey!

Mukey: I will destroy you

Tree is very cool: I EAT ASS I EAT ASS I EAT ASS

Bob the billder: yeah he does ;)))

Mike dirt: biLLIE

frnk: um what did Ryan do

Tricky rick: well he almost got alcohol poisoning

WEEDE: AND THEN HE AND DALLON SUCKED FACE

brendone: WTF RYAN

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WTF PETE

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wait brendon why are you so upset

brendone: MAYBE BECAUSE WERE IN A FUCKING RELATIOBSHIP

dal the pal: shit sorry gotta kms

>> dal the pal has left the chat!

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: may I remind you we were never in a relationship To start with

Bob the billder: ummmm Brendon he's kinda right

brendone: SHUT THE FUCK UP BILLY

Bob the billder: * gasp *

>>. Bob the billder has removed brendone from the chat!

Bob the billder: come back when you can fucking spel

Mike dirt: that was spelled wrong

Bob the billder: ur lucky I love you

Mike dirt: aw thx billy

Bob the billder: GOODBYE THOT

>> bob the billder has removed mike dirt from the chat!

Bob the billder: motherfucker

tricky rick: ARE WE ALL JUST GOING TO IGNORE THE FACT THAT DALLON SAID HES GONNA KILL HIMSELF

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: I'm gonna find him make sure he doesn't do anything stupid and shitty

brendone: yeah cause you're dating him not me

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: Brendon... Please.

-- IN ANOTHER CHAT AND ITS JUST RYAN AND BRENDON --

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: bren... I think we both knew this was gonna blow up in our faces.

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and we were never in a relationship in the first place, more like friends with benefits, you know?

brendone: yeah... i love you though ryan and I know we were never really official but I still do

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: I'm sorry bren

Brendone: it's ok. you and dal will make a really fucking cute couple

Brendone: plus threesomes

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: BRENDON

 

Chapter Text

brendone: SO APPARENTLY ITS NOT "PROPER" TO DEEPTHROAT A PUSH POP IN FRONT OF THE #HOT SECURITY GUY

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: Brendon wtf

tricky rick: Jesus

WEEDE: what flavor was it

mukey: thats what you're concerned about?

brendone: it was blue raspberry

WEEDE: yeah that's ok bUT I like bubble gum better

bob the billder: I AM THE LORAX I SPEAK FOR THE WEED

Mike dirt: oh billies awake perfect he can suck my dick again

Tree is very cool: y'all should have seen the shit we pulled last night at the party

frnk: yeah shit went down it was gr8

bae: you heard from a vvv drunk tre that I was leaving you so you drank three cans of beer climbed in the oven and sobbed

frnk: gr8

tree is very cool: yeahhhh that was a highlight of the night

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: what abt the threesome between mike billie and tre

Mike dirt: a+ dick sucking

tricky rick: tmi

>> WEEDE has changed tricky rick's name to lunchbox!

lunchbox: dear god why

WEEDE: I'm bored

lunchbox: of course you are

brendone: Peter we must talk

WEEDE: the hell you want h0

brendone: bubblegum push pops are gross

WEEDE: BITCH TAKE THAT SHIT BACK

brendone: NO

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: where's Dallon he can fix this

WEEDE: TAKE IT BACKKKKK

>> lunchbox has invited dal the pal to the chat!

dal the pal: Brendon I'm so sorry

brendone: it's okay ry explained it to me I get it

dal the pal: thank god there's no clusterfuck

lunchbox: unless you count pete and Brendon arguing over push pops

WEEDE: BUT THE CONTRAST FROM THE PINK TO YOUR LIPS IS HOTTT

brendone: BITCH THT IS INCORRECT BLUE RASPBERRY IS THE SHIT ITS SO MUCH BETTER LOOKING AND TASTING

mike dirt: like my dick

bob the billder: you know it ;))))

tree is very cool: come over to my house

WEEDE: coming

tree is very cool: nO not you mike and Billie so i can suck mikes dick again

tree is very cool: cuz I do NOT remember doing it last night

lunchbox: can we go back to the fact that Brendon thinks deepthroat is a word

brendone: BUT ITS A SONG

lunchbox: NO

brendone: hUmp mE

Tree is very cool: FUCK ME

WEEDE: DADDY BETTER MAKE ME CHOKE

dal the pal: save us

Bob the billder: LICK LICK LICK LICK I WANT TO EAT YO DICK

mike dirt: why thanks billie ;))))

mukey: GROSS

 

Chapter Text

dal the pal: I'm gonna fucking kill brendon in about a half second 

brendone: HAHAHAHHAHAHA 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: oh lord what happened 

brendone: DALLON IS PLAYING THE KIM K GAME ON HIS PHONE 

dal the pal: YOU FUCKING BITCH ASS HOE 

WEEDE: o dear 

lunchbox: the Kim kardashian Hollywood game? smh 

Tree is very cool: Billie and mike played it at one point 

Bob the billder: ngl it was a great game 

Mike dirt: you married me on it 

Bob the billder: i wanted to marry tre too but he didn't get the game 

lunchbox: y? 

Tree is very cool: not enough storage 

dal the pal: what?? 

Tree is very cool: let's just say hentai is h0t 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU DOWNLOADED HENTAI PORN ONTO YOUR PHONE TRE WTF 

tree is very cool: in my defense gay hentai is hard to come by 

WEEDE: HEARD OF PORNHUB 

tree is very cool; ITS HARD TO FIND GOOD GAY HENTAI THESE DAYS 

mike dirt: just call me I'll get you off ;)))) 

tree is very cool: noted thx mike 

>> WEEDE changed mike dirt's name to tre's personal pornhub! 

tre's personal pornhub: thanks pete 

dal the pal: I can't believe you exposed me bren 

brendone: did it for the vine 

tre's personal pornhub: are none of yall gonna say threesome 

WEEDE: THREESOME 

tre's personal pornhub: anyone but you pete pls 

lunchbox: wait googling

lunchbox: according to the official kim k game wiki you can be in relationships with as many people as you want

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: welp patrick has it on his phone too 

lunchbox: RYAN NO 

WEEDE: PATRICK YOU FUCKER 

WEEDE: wait ryan is he in a kim k relationship with somebody 

this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: no surprisingly 

lunchbox: i hate you all 

>> WEEDE changed lunchbox's name to the kim k wiki! 

the kim k wiki: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe 

Chapter Text

dal the pal: hello motherfuckers 

>> brendone has changed his name to ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;)! 

lunchbox: wtf is that font 

WEEDE: bitch i want that 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): you fucking wish pete youll never find my secrets 

mukey: lingojam.com/fontchanger 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): MIKEY YOU BASTARD 

WEEDE: HAHAHAHAHHA BRENDON YOU TWOFACED SLUT I HAVE IT 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): BITCHHHH

bob the billder: i think its time we had a change up 

>> bob the billder has changed dal the pal's name to daldo! 

daldo: fuck you 

>> bob the billder has changed this man is a top goddamn and what a top's name to ryroo! 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): aww thats cute 

daldo: oof yeah 

ryroo: fuck you

>> bob the billder has changed their name to 50% weed! 

the kim k game wiki: WTFFF

>> WEEDE has changed their name to meme wentz! 

meme wentz: yas fuck it up billie 

50% weed: y thank you peter 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): pillie 

>> the kim k game wiki has left the chat! 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): what? 

daldo: YOU FUCKING IDIOT BRENDON WHAT THE HELL 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): WHAT DID I DOOOO

50% weed: omf im stupid but jesus christ brenodn

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW MISSPELLING MY NAME HUH BILLY

50% weed: * gasp * I THOUGHT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS 

ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): FUCK YOU

>> 50% weed has changed ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;)'s name to brenodn! 

brenodn: YOU MOTHERFUCKER 

ryroo: PETE 

meme wentz: IM TRYING TO FIND PATRICK 

meme wentz: HE WONT ANSWER MY TEXTS OR MY CALLS 

daldo: brendon oh my god 

meme wentz: brendon youre gonna die when i find patrick 

>> meme wentz has invited the kim k game wiki to the chat! 

meme wentz: PATTY

the kim k game wiki: PETEY 

daldo: yay theyre reunited 

the kim k game: AND NOW IM GONNA KILL BRENDON 

Chapter Text

50% weed: we need to spice shit up in here

>> 50% weed has changed the Kim k game's name to cute potato!

>> 50% weed has changed meme Wentz's name to emo potato!

>> 50% weed has changed daldo's name to tall potato!

>> 50% weed has changed their name to rocker potato!

>> rocker potato has changed tre's personal pornhub's name to bass potato!

>> rocker potato has changed tree is very cool's name to drum potato!

>> rocker potato has changed bae's name to goth potato!

goth potato: bitch

tall potato: you ain't a fuckin rocker

rocker potato: stop being a dream breaker

>> rocker potato has changed mukey's name to salty potato!

Salty potato: BISH YOU WISH

>> rocker potato has changed frnk's name to short potato!

short potato: are you quite finished

cute potato: Awwww thanks billie

rocker potato: ur welcome pat :)

emo potato: hEY NOW

goth potato: I don't like my name

rocker potato: OH WAIT

>> rocker potato changed ryroo's name to scarf potato!

>> rocker potato changed breodn's name to gay potato!

Rocker potato: k we good now

Bass potato: no billie

Drum potato: yES billie

emo potato: wtf tre youre not billie

Gay potato: ur not wrong billie

Scarf potato: FUCK I LOOK GOOD

Tall potato: hmmmmmm k

Scarf potato: * gasp * UR SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE YOU WHORE

cute potato: no dont fight pls

Rocker potato: yeah you guys are scaring pat

Emo potato: aw HELL no

Emo potato: only i can call him pat fuck off billie

Bass potato: hey now is petey jealous

Salty potato: pete you look stupid just let it be

Emo potato: FUCK OFF MIKEU

drum potato: omfg pete

Rocker potato: TRE NO

>> drum potato has changed salty potato's name to mikeu!

mikeu: pete ur so protective wtf billies just pats friend lmao

emo potato: YOU DONT FUCKING GET IT DO YOU BILLIE YOU FCKTARD

>> emo potato has left the chat!

rocker potato: wtf?? what did i do

cute potato: hes protective it's okay billie

tall potato: wtf why you love him Patrick

cute potato: he just gets convinced that I'll leave him that hes not good enough

scarf potato: but like... U wouldn't

cute potato: exactly! he just doesn't think that

goth potato: what??? but he's like

goth potato: a fukin emo legend

Drum potato:'so r u gonna tell him ur breaking up in person or what

Cute potato: tRE WERE NOT BREAKING UP OMF

scarf potato: yeAH IN PERSON * cough cough * bREN

Gay potato: YOU WERE OUT OF TOWN WTF WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO RYAN

scarf potato: CALL ME????

gay potato: aNYWAY holy fuckin shit peterick was the last ship I expected to die

cute potato: fuck you lot im adding pete in again

>> cute potato has invited emo potato to the chat!

Rocker potato: YO PETEY PIE PATRICK HERE HAS TO TELL YOU SOMETHING

bass potato: OMF BILLIE NO

drum potato: heard y'all are breaking up

Mikeu: tre no

Emo potato: wtf?? pat?

Cute potato: no Pete it's not what u think

Emo potato: u fuxking kidding me rn? couldn't tell me in person could you??

Cute potato: Pete please I'm trying to tell you

Emo potato: seems to me I already know

Emo potato: thanks Patrick

>> Cute potato has left the chat!

Bass potato: PETE THIS IS TRES FAULT

Drum potato: i resent that

Bass potato: stfu

Gay potato: TRE JUST ASSUMED THAT YOU AND PATRICK WERE BREAKING UP BUT ITS NOT TRUE

bass potato: CUZ UR ALL PROTECTIVE N SHIT CUZ INSECURITY IS A BITCH AM I RIGHT

short potato: u sir are correct

tall potato: darn tootin

gay potato: dallon...??

tall potato: darn tootin

Scarf potato: tRE NO

>> drum potato has changed the chat name to darn tootin!

Tall potato: sooooo fuck me in the ass cause I love jesussss

Gay potato: can I get an amen

Drum potato: a WOman

Rocker potato: feminism

 

Chapter Text

Pete Wentz has invited Patrick Stump to the chat!

Pete Wentz: would you like to explain what's going on rn

Patrick Stump: Pete, I don't wanna break up with you. Tre assumed we were after you left the chat the first time.

Patrick Stump: and I love you, Pete, but that was a dick move.

Pete Wentz: I know, I'm sorry

Patrick Stump: you had better fucking be

Pete Wentz: I just thought you had finally realized that Billie is better than me.

Patrick: he's not, and I love you, Pete. Nothing will ever change that.

Pete Wentz: love u patty

Patrick Stump: call me patty again and I'm gonna really dump ur ass

Pete Wentz: no patty im sorry

Patrick Stump: I'm going to kill you.

Chapter Text

Goth potato: BITCH WE HAVE NEWS

Cute potato: you better have a damn good reason for waking me up motherfucker

Drum potato: GASP PATRICK WE DONT USE THOSE WORDS HERE

bass potato: yo tre just dropped his phone and swore like a drunk sailor

Cute potato: hahahaha suffer

emo potato: ANYWAYYYYY
BRENDON GOT A JOB AT KINGS DOMINION

rocker potato: that fuckin like amusement park type shit?

emo potato: YES HES YELLING AT PEOPLE AND HES ONLY BEEN HIRED FOR 15 MINUTES

gay potato: tHESE FUCKING PEOPLE WONT PUT THEIR SEATBELTS ON

scarf potato: suffer MORE

tall potato: I want a new name

bass potato: don't kill anyone Brendon

drum potato: ha I hope he does that would be funny

>> tall potato has changed their name to tree!

Short potato: I wake up to this r u fucking srs

>> tree has changed short potato's name to oreo!

oreo: R U FUCKING KIDDING ME

>> tree has changed bass potato's name to muke!

tree: before u ask
I am out of ideas

oreo: LET ME DO THIS

>> oreo has changed rocker potato's name to pottos!

pottos: r u fucking srs rn

oreo: STEALING LINES ARE WE

pottos: FUCK OFF
I SPELLED POTATO WRONG ONE TIME AND NO ONE LETS ME FORGET IT

scarf potato: you spelled potato wrong in an English essay and handed that shit in bitch

muke: didn't the teacher fail u for that

potto: none of ur fucking business mike

>> potto has changed their name to asshole!

asshole: theeeeeeere we go uh huh

gay potato: snap snap snap

muke: wtf

>> muke has changed asshole's name to billie!

billie: ok well this works too

>> billie has changed gay potato's name to whore!

Whore: fuck youuuu hoo hoo hoo

Tree: IS THAT FUCKIBG CEELO GREEN

Billie: I SEE U DRIVING ROUND TOWN WITH THE BOY I LOVE AND IM LIKE

whore: FUCK YOUUUUU

drum potato: HOO HOO HOOOOO

 

emo potato: hey
There's a new kid at school also named billie

Whore: shall we add them in

tree: oh shit

>> whore has invited bad guy to the chat!

bad guy: what the actual fuck
What is this

tree: i jUST SPILLED MY APPLESAUCE

whore: I'll come lick it off u ;))

tree: do not

muke: CAN WE GET ANOTHER FUCKING ROLL CALL

whore: U ALREADY FUCKIN KNOW BITCH AYE
but it's Brendon Urie

muke: well thank you for that and btw I'm mike Dirnt

tree: Dallon Weekes

scarf potato: Ryan Ross

Emo potato: Pete WENTZ!

oreo: Frank Iero

Drum potato: tré cool bitch

Billie: Billie Joe Armstrong

tree: and Patrick and some other people r prob here but they ain't talkin
Hey new buddy what r ur pronouns

bad guy: I'm billie eilish
but people say I'm billie o'connell
bullshit
i use they/them as i am agender

billie: oh hey what's up

bad guy: wait
r u like
the billie joe armstrong
the one who

muke: smokes an obscene amount of weed
Has threesomes with me n tre regularly
That's him alright

drum potato: dyed his hair pink for a dare
93.2256% of the time is either drunk/high
Did meth w/me once
Yep

muke: U FUCKING DID METH TRE BILLIE WHAT THE FUCK

emo potato: one I want a new nickname
Two that sounds lit as TIT

Cute potato: Pete you're not doing meth.

Billie: wow y'all know eeeeeeeverything

muke: tre meth can kill you

>> drum potato has changed his name to death by meth!

Death by meth: welcome back to hell