Chapter 1: fuck you
> Gerard Way has started a chat! <
> Gerard Way has changed his name to gee spot! <
> gee spot has named the chat Devil's Home! <
> gee spot has invited Frank Iero, Mikey Way, Brendon Urie, and Josh Dun to the chat! <
gee spot: hi fuckers
> Frank Iero has joined the chat! <
Frank Iero: why tf am i here
gee spot: youre here in hell!
Frank Iero: yes ik but rlly why
> Mikey Way has joined the chat! <
Mikey Way: y are we here
gee spot: srsly u guys are no fun
> Brendon Urie has joined the chat! <
Brendon Urie: WHASSUP DICKHEADS
gee spot: hai brend
> Brendon Urie has changed his name to Satan! <
Satan: hello my fren
Mikey Way: *friend
> Satan has changed Mikey Way's name to dis bich no fun! <
dis bich no fun: fuck u
Satan: fuck me
Frank Iero: now now thats just gross stfu
> gee spot has changed Frank Iero's name to no ur gross! <
no ur gross: fucker
gee spot: im not sorry
> Josh Dun has joined the chat! <
Josh Dun: wtf is this
Satan: hell ofc
dis bich no fun: leave while u still can
Josh Dun: o idk this looks interesting
no ur gross: ITS NOT ITS FUCKING HELL
Satan: well now ur here lets change it up shall we
no ur gross: NO
> Satan has changed Josh Dun's name to dunwiththistrash! <
dunwiththistrash: its not that bad
dis bich no fun: are u sure abt tht
gee spot: guess who we all r
dunwiththistrash: dis bich no fun is mikey cuz hes just no fun anyways
Satan: YES PREACH
dis bich no fun: fuck u
dunwiththistrash: gee spot is gee like could this b more obvious and Satan is brend
dunwiththistrash: and idek who no ur gross is
gee spot: frank
dis bich no fun: fronk
no ur gross: fuck u all
no ur gross: dun i cant believe ur going with this shit
dunwiththistrash: can i invite a friend?
> dunwiththistrash has invited Tyler Joseph to the chat! <
< Tyler Joseph joined the chat! <
Tyler Joseph: wtf
> dunwiththistrash has changed Tyler Joseph's name to tyguy!<
no ur gross: leave while u still can this is hell
tyguy: um idk whats happening but im staying for it
no ur gross: fuck u!!
gee spot: fuck ME
no ur gross: no ur gross
> gee spot has changed no ur gross' name to i should fuck gee! <
i should fuck gee: no way in hell
Satan: awwwe i ship it
i should fuck gee: NO! DO NOT SHIP THIS THIS IS NOT A THING
> gee spot has shared a photo file. Click to open. <
dunwiththistrash: is this srsly what i think it is
tyguy: is this frank blowing gee
Satan: holy fuck THIS BE GAY
dis bich no fun: so it wasnt gay before?
Satan: yeah it was but rlly frank the bathroom
i should fuck gee: yeah i mean you want me to blow him in the living room on the couch?
dunwiththistrash: i mean it'd be great comedy and blackmail material
i should fuck gee: dick
Chapter 2: we're waiting
Ray, Patrick, and Pete. Shit's going down.
> Satan invited Ray Toro, and Dallon Weekes to the chat! <
> Ray Toro has joined the chat! <
> Dallon Weekes has joined the chat! <
Satan: hi and welcome to hell
Ray toro: what the actual fuck
Dallon Weekes: what is this
Satan: hell duh
Ray Toro: well we know that but I
Satan: this group chat I made
Dallon Weekes: and who's i
Satan: brendon u no?
Dallon Weekes: o ok
Ray Toro: do I not get a nickname? everyone else seems to have 1
> Satan has changed Ray Toro's name to afroboi! <
Afroboi: afroboi!?!!?????? Wtf b
Satan: no I'm satan
Afroboi: fuck u
Afroboi: well if I get a name Dallon gets one too
>> afroboi has changed Dallon Weekes' name to crybaby!
afroboi: can I invite some friends
Satan: yh who
afroboi: Pete and Patrick
>> afroboi has invited Pete Wentz and Patrick Stump to the chat!
Pete Wentz: HI FUCKERS
Patrick Stump: what is this
>> afroboi has changed Patrick Stump's name to confused!
Confused: youre right
>>Confused has changed Pete Wentz's name to bleach boi
Bleach boi: were you referring to my "drink bleach" joke
bleach boi: o ok
Satan: STFU AND KISS ALREADY COME TF ON
Satan: WE ARE WAITINGGG
>>dunwiththistrash, dis bich no fun, I should fuck gee, and gee spot joined the chat!
Gee spot: u fuckers started without me?!? Wtf
Confused: they invited me and pete too
gee spot: brendon u fUcKeR
dis bich no fun: BRENDON YOU FUCKER
Satan: sorry :'(
Satan: but srsly wht do u hav against pete n pat?
dis bich no fun: NOTHING JUST WARN ME FIRST JESUS
bleach boi: AS I WAS SAYING
bleach boi: also hi mikey :)
dis bich no fun: stfu pete
bleach boi :((( ok
crybaby: u were saying anything??
bleach boi: stfu dallon
confused: just let him talk
bleach boi: THANK YOU
bleach boi: as i was saying or rather b was saying
Satan: yeah u guys are cute together i mean the king of emo and the french foren exchange student wat cld go wrong
dis bich no fun: foren
dunwiththistrash: F O R E N
i should fuck gee: *foreign
Satan: whatever theyre cute and they should get together
gee spot: um kiung of emo? kiss my aSS pete u ware too much eyeliner anywayas
bleach boi: so many spelling mistake
gee spot: stfu pete
bleach boi: so many
gee spot: OML STFU PETE LET ME FUCKING TALK
Afroboi: yeah pete
bleach boi: excuse me who fucking asked you bush head
> Satan changed Afroboi's name to bush head! <
bush head: wow
bush head: wheres dallon
Satan: oh hi
afroboi: DALLON JUST STOOD UP AND SHOUTED "IM ON THE INTERNET" RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ENGLISH
afroboi: AND THEN SAT BACK DOWN
afroboi: AND THEN MIKEY GOT UP AND YELLED ME TOO AND THREW HIS BOOK OUT THE WINDOW
Satan: holy shit
crybaby: hey at least ms davis didnt take my phone
dis bich no fun: the book was boring
dis bich no fun: it was the catcher in the rye
confused: UM THATS A REALLY GOOD BOOK
dis bich no fun: the hell it is its boring af
gee spot: ur boring af
dunwiththistrash: ur boring af
gee spot: UR GAY AF
Satan: we all are gay af
bleach boi: are u sure abt that
Satan: UR FUCKING GAY AS SHIT
bleach boi: no i mean
bleach boi: hang on
> bleach boi has removed and silenced confused from the chat! <
crybaby: wtf pete
bleach boi: well i wanted to tell u guys in person but u know awkward n shit
bush head: k
dis bich no fun: do go on
bleach boi: ik were all pat's friends but i wanted to see if it was ok by u guys 2
bleach boi: i like patrick and i really want to go out
>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!
Satan: CAN I PICK THEM OR CAN I PICK THEM
gee spot: you cant pick em
afroboi: is everyone going to ignore that mikey just left?
Satan: PETERICK CONFIRMED
Satan: now delete these messages so my boi 'trick doesn't find out ;)))))
Chapter 3: gone sexual
More insanity. And what happened to Mikey's book?
> dis bich no fun, tyguy, dunwiththistrash, Satan, i should fuck gee, crybaby, bush head, gee spot, confused and bleach boi joined the chat! <
crybaby: wow everyones here at the same time this is weird
Satan: its AWESOME!!!!
dis bich no fun: im in lunch detention
bush head: why?
dis bich no fun: I THREW MY FUCKING BOOK OUT THE WINDOW DICKHEAD
gee spot: damn calm down
bush head: yeah as far as i know my head is a bush not a dick
dis bich no fun: fuck u
> dis bich no fun has changed bush head's name to dickhead! <
dickhead: youre really funny mikey
dis bich no fun: ikr
Satan: it said dallon joined whrere is he
dunwiththistrash: whrere isnt a word
Satan: STFU JOSH UR NOT MY SPELLCHECKER
crybaby: its * where *
crybaby: and im right here
Satan: o hi
tyguy: fuck this
tyguy: im in math and its terrible
tyguy: so im leaving
dickhead: ty did u just srsly walk right out
tyguy: well i said i was leaving
dickhead: shes sending pete after u
bleach boi: TYLER GET THE FUCK BACK HERE
bleach boi: WHY THO
tyguy: MATH SUCKS AND IM NOT GOING BACK
confused: where are you???
dunwiththistrash: WHY WOULD YOU TELL HIM THAT NOW PETE KNOWS
tyguy: I LIED IM IN THE CAFETERIA
bleach boi: bathroom it is
tyguy: fuck off pete
bleach boi: nononono
dis bich no fun: ha
bleach boi: PATRICK HELP ME
confused: IM IN STUDY HALL
bleach boi: shit
bleach boi: MIKEY HELP ME
dis bich no fun: IM IN DETENTION YOU ASS
bleach boi: whatever im going back to class ill tell davis i couldn't find him
tyguy: hi its josh on ty's phone
dunwiththistrash: hi its ty on josh's phone
gee spot: hi its gee on frank's dick
dis bich no fun: WHOA WHOA WHOA
bleach boi: GONE SEXUAL
dickhead: GONE SMEXUAL
crybaby: WTF IS SMEXUAL
crybaby: stfu brendon srsly
Satan: no sorry
dickhead: wish i was sitting on frank's dick
gee spot: FRANK IS MINE
i should fuck gee: dont i get a say in this
gee spot: NO
dickhead: ctfo i was joking
dickhead: i want pete's dick
bleach boi: EXCUSE ME
tyguy: ok i got my phone back
dunwiththistrash: I FOUDN MIKEYS BOOK
crybaby: foudn? no its *found* my child
dunwiththistrash: STFU ITS IN THE COURTYARD
Satan: its mine now im coming
dis bich no fun: DONT U FUCKING DARE ITS MINE
Chapter 4: spookp season
>> Satan and gee spot have joined the chat!
gee spot: hey b
Satan: HI BITCH
gee spot: wow hi
gee spot: look it's almost October which means
Satan: SPOOK SEASON
Satan: SPOOK SEASON MY BOIZZZZZ
gee spot: spook season yes you are correct
Satan: does that mean scaring the fuck out of some little kids
gee spot: perhaps
Satan: YESSSSSSSSS BOIIIIIIIIIIIIII
gee spot: YESSSSSSSSSS BOIIIIIIIIII
Satan: so Mikey
Satan: is he doing his haunted house this year?
gee spot: he better be or I stg will break his tiny ass
Satan: and I will help you
>> I should fuck gee has joined the chat!
I should fuck gee: WHASSUP BITCHES IT BE SPOOKP SEASON
gee spot: excuse me SPOOKP
Satan: oof frank
>> gee spot has changed I should fuck gee's name to spookp season!
Spookp season: dandy gerard
Gee spot: np love <333
Satan: so spook season and Mikey's haunted house
Gee spot: yea so Mikey says he wants to have it be like an asylum themed thing you know?
Spookp season: MAYBE WE SHOULD FUCKING ASK MIKEY
>>Spookp season has invited dis bich no fun to the chat!
dis bich no fun: w a t do you fuckin want you duck
Gee spot: you duck
dis bich no fun: u duck
>>spookp season has changes gee spot's name to u duck!
U duck: U FUCKING DUCK
Spookp season: yea that's me
>> dunwiththistrash and bandit0 have joined the chat!
Dunwiththistrash: whoa Ty when did u change ur name
bandit0: ;))) you'll never know
Satan: READ THE SHIT ABOVE BC ITS IMPORTANT FOR SPOOK SEASON
Spookp season: yea hence my name lmao
bandit0:... Mikey has a haunted house??
Dunwiththistrash: apparently yes
dis bich no fun: YES I DO BITCH
dunwiththistrash: damn ctfo
Dis bich no fun: NO
u duck: CLAM THE FIUCK DOWN JMIEKY WAY
Spookp season: "clam the fiuck down"
u duck: FUCK YOU ALL
dun with this trash :D :D :D :D :D
bandit0: whats up josh
>> dun with this trash has removed bandit0 from the chat!
Spookp season: whoa wtf did u do tht for
dunwiththistrash: look i wanna surprise ty for his bday
dunwiththistrash: its on monday
Satan: w a t
Spookp season: thats a good idea i'll bring the booze
Satan: IVE GOT THE WEED
dunwiththistrash: um ok well there goes my cake plan
U duck: NO STILL BRING CAKE
dunwiththistrash: i guess it would b more fun with cake :)
Satan: YOU ARE CORRECT MY SON
dunwiththistrash: now delete these messages we dont want ty seeing them
dunwiththistrash: its supposed to b a surprise
dis bich no fun: k gotchu
>> Spookp season invited bandit0 to the chat!
bandit0: y did u remove me josh :((((((((
bandit0: its ok i forgive u
u duck: ...
Satan: THAT WAS SO FUCKING PURE
dis bich no fun: stfu brendon
Chapter 5: fuck u fuck ur life fuck your fucking cow i dont care anymore just leave me alone
Mikey and Pete's relationship has taken a nasty turn, while Patrick is stuck in the middle. things are being said.
this one's really short but things are said :D
>> bleach boi has created a new chat!
>> bleach boi has invited dis bich no fun to the chat!
dis bich no fun: oh hi pete
dis bich no fun: bye pete
>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!
bleach boi: aw hell no youre getting back here bitch
>> bleach boi has invited dis bich no fun to the chat!
>> bleach boi has changed the chat settings!
dis bich no fun: i cant fucking leave wtf pete
bleach boi: we need to talk
dis bich no fun: about what? we have nothing to say to each other.
bleach boi: thats a lie and you know it mikey
dis bich no fun: pete lets just not
bleach boi: i just need you to be decent to patrick
dis bich no fun: i dont have problems with patrick hes my friend
dis bich no fun: youre what i have an issue with
bleach boi: i said i was sorry what more do i have to say!?
dis bich no fun: sorry doesnt fucking cut it pete wentz and you fucking know it now change the goddamn settings so i can leave
bleach boi: ok :(
dis bich no fun: fuck u fuck ur life fuck your fucking cow i dont care anymore just leave me alone now goodbye
>> dis bich no fun has left the chat!
bleach boi: bye mikey
bleach boi: i just didnt tell you i still love you
>> bleach boi has left the chat!
Chapter 6: fUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW
The title says it all :D
Warning: Mentions of anorexia and depression
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
bandit0: WHAT THE FUCK JOSH
Satan: wHOA TYJOS MAKING A SCENE
dis bich no fun: o fuck what happened ty
dunwiththistrash: i didnt mean it!!!!!!!
bandit0: tHIS BITCH
bandit0: THIS BITCH SAID DEPRESSION ISNT AS BAD AS PPL MAKE IT OUT TO BE
Confused: no no no no why would you say that josh!!!
dunwiththistrash: i wAS TRYING TO SAY SOME PEOPLE ARE OVERDRAMATIC ABOUT IT WHEN THEY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THE REAL THING
Confused: BUT THAT'S NOT THE WAY YOU SAY IT
>> U duck, Spookp season, and bleach boi have joined the chat!
U duck: just read the messages
U duck: and wtf josh
bandit0: YOU KNOW I USED TO B ANOREXIC AND DEPRESSED AND YOU DONT KNOW HOW BAD IT IS
bandit0: ITS JUST NOT SOMETHING U JOKE ABOUT
bandit0: you know what I'm so done
>> bandit0 has left the chat!
Spookp season: wtf
>> crybaby and dickhead have joined the chat!
crybaby: fUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW
Satan: OMG BITCH ME TOO
bleach boi: i turn off my phone for ONE MOTHERFUCKING MINUTE and we went to hell???
Satan: you have forgotten we are already in hell my child
bleach boi: ur not my child
>> bleach boi have changed Satan's name to my child!
my child: thought u said i wasnt ur child
bleach boi: not mine
bleach boi: mikeys
dis bich no fun: YOU FUCKER NO THIS INFIDEL IS NOT MY SOn
my child: wELL OKAY THEN THANKS DAD
crybaby: daddy ;)
U duck: nO
U duck: NO KINKS NO KINKS FOR MIKEY NOPE NOPE NOPE
dis bich no fun: yeah pls no
bleach boi: pls
dis bich no fun: stfu pete no one asked u
bleach boi: fuck you
my child: fuck me ;))
my child: WAIT HOLD UP I HAVE AN ANOUNCHE MENT
crybaby: wHAT SUPERB SPELLING
my child: OMF STFU DALLON THIS IS IMPORTANT
my child: i just saw the most adorable boy in history walk into my class
my child: OMF HIS NAME IS RYAN WTFFFFFFF
dunwiththistrash: o ryan hes in my math class
my child: HE IS PERFECT
>> my child invited Ryan Ross to the chat!
>> crybaby has left the chat!
Ryan Ross: what is this and who are you
dunwiththistrash: ROLL CALL
bleach boi: pete wentz
Confused: patrick stump
dunwiththistrash: josh dun
dickhead: ray toro
dis bich no fun: mikey way
u duck: gerard way
Spookp season: frank iero
my child: brendon urie :)
dunwiththistrash: and tyler used to be here he was bandit0
my child: where the fuck is dallon he was crybaby
Ryan Ross: he left it looks like but srsly tho why am i here
Confused: read the messages from before
Ryan Ross: ....
Ryan Ross: ur all gey af
my child: wld u like to b gey with us ;))))))
Confused: OH MY FUCK BRENDON YOU DIDNT DELETE THE MESSAGES THAT WERE BASICALLY WORSHIPPING RYAN YOU FUCKASS
bleach boi: o fuk
my child: O FUK
my child: SORRY PLS DONT THINK IM CREEPY OR SHIT I JUST THINK YOU LOOK PRETTY OKAY PLS DONT HATE ME
Ryan Ross: i dont hate u
my child: OH THANK GOD
dickhead: so we're all just gonna ignore the fact that dallon left okay
dickhead: hang on what about the party we said we were going to have
U duck: o the one yesterday brendon said he was gonna bring weed to
Spookp season: i suck dick for cocaine
bleach boi: daddy ;)))))
U duck: NOPE NONE OF THAT THANK YOU
>> Confused has removed bleach boi from the chat!
U duck: damn pat u got to him first
Ryan Ross: he deserved it
my child: O SHIT IM TELLING PETE HE JUST GOT CLAPBACKED BY THE NEW KID
my child: pete says fuk u
Ryan Ross: tell pete to suck my dick
>> Confused has removed Ryan Ross from the chat!
>> my child has added Ryan Ross to the chat!
my child: nO patrick we dont DO that here
u duck: does this mean joshler is over
Note: I don't think Tyler Joseph was anorexic or had depression bUT HE MIGHT HAVe. For the drama, I said he had. My apologies, don't rip off my head.
Chapter 7: P U B L I C S E R V I C E A N N O U N C E M E N T
:) :) :) :) :) :) :)
Hi guys! This particular chapter isn't actually a chapter for the story, it's more like a P U B L I C S E R V I C E
A N N O U N C E M E N T. I wanted to give you guys my information for Wattpad and Tumblr
so you can find me there.
My Tumblr: https://psychedelicharlequin.tumblr.com/
My Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/the_on_crack_parade
Patrick Stump creating a song using GarageBand: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rLcAHVu5JU
Annnnnd that's about it! The (official) seventh chapter of Devil's Home will be out
sometime this week. See ya!!
Chapter 8: No uh uh mr weekes
Sorry this was so short. I wrote this on Christmas vacation so not much is getting done
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Ryan Ross has invited Ray Toro, Dallon Weekes, Frank Iero, and Patrick Stump to the chat!
Ryan Ross: guys
Ryan Ross: GUYS WE NEED TO TALK
Frank Iero: wtf do you want ry
Ryan Ross: look so brendon from the main chat right
Dallon Weekes: oh we're talking abt brendon? Lol I'm out
Dallon Weekes has left the chat!
Ryan Ross: wtf?
Ray Toro: no uh uh mr Weekes get back here
Ray Toro has invited Dallon Weekes to the chat!
Patrick Stump: what the actual hell Dallon??
Dallon Weekes: would it surprise u that I don't want to talk abt it
Ray Toro: no now tell us
Dallon Weekes: no
Dallon Weekes has left the chat!
Ryan Ross: at this point it's prob useless to try and get him to join again
Patrick Stump: alright then what did u want to tell us?
Ryan Ross: well brendon from the main chat you know
Frank Iero: YES WE KNOW
Ryan Ross: ok well I read back through the texts u were warning me abt Patrick
Ryan Ross: and I think it's cute but how do I even respond to that
Frank Iero: ignore him?? that's what we all do
Ryan Ross: won't that get suspicious after awhile
Frank Iero: no
Frank Iero: let's get back to the main chat, they'll get suspicious
Probably I won't get much done over winter break, so until the new year not much will get written. Sorry for its shortness!
my child: GUESS WHO I FUCKED LAST NIGHT
Confused: oh bremdom no
bleach boi: CONDOM
>> U duck changed my child's name to CONDOM NO!
CONDOM NO: IM NOT EVEN MAD RLLY BUT SRSLY GUESS WHO I FUCKED
CONDOM NO: also dom ;))
Confused: if its ryan
U duck: it IS
bleach boi: we all knew it was ryan
dunwiththistrash: BRENDON ITS BEEN TWO DAYS AND U FUCKED RYAN ALREADY
CONDOM NO: hells yeah
dunwiththistrash: hey pete 5 dollars brendons lying and he bottomed
bleach boi: ur on
U duck: #brendonbottomed2k18
bleach boi: #brendonbottomed2k19
CONDOM NO: no nO I DID NOT BOTTOM THAT IS INACCURATE
CONDOM NO: also who told u that
Ryan Ross: um
dunwiththistrash: YOU NEED A NICKNAME SON
>> dunwiththistrash changed Ryan Ross' name to this man totally tops goddamn and what a top!
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wtf josh
CONDOM NO: nO i TOppEODP !
bleach boi: #stroke
Spookp season: ITS NEW YEARS EVE FUCKERS IMMA HAVE A LIT PARTY AT MY HOUSE BRING WEED
CONDOM NO: hell yeah!!
CONDOM NO: i will prove to you all that i top
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: he bottoms #brendonbottoms2k18
CONDOM NO: WTF RYAN
CONDOM NO: THIS IS BETRAYAL
sorry this was so crappy ITS NEW YEARS EVE FUCKERS HAPPY 20-FUCKING-19 YEAH KIDS
Chapter 10: train wreck: the group chat
This title was commented on the last chapter and I thought: I need that as a title.
This is what happened at the new year's party. (PART ONE)
Confused: i texted tyler hes coming
dunwiththistrash: he is?? omg patrick thank you so much im gonna apologize and give him his birthday gift I forgot to give him
CONDOM NO: yeah we had the cake... bUT DALLON DROPPED IT
bleach boi: wait dallons here?
crybaby: never left
Confused: you literally did dallon
dunwiththistrash: YOU FUCKING DROPPED THE CAKE I WILL STG KILL YOU ALL
dickhead: now you know how we feel
tricky rick: tru tru
u duck: we should have classier nicknames
Spookp season: i got this
>> Spookp season has changed Confused's name to tricky rick!
>> Spookp season change u duck's name to bae!
>> Spookp season changed bleach boi's name to eyeliner boi!
>> Spookp season changed crybaby's name to dal the pal!
>> Spookp season changed dunwiththistrash's name to joosh!
>> Spookp season changed dickhead's name to fro!
>> Spookp season changed dis bich no fun's name to milky
>> Spookp season changed their own name to frnk!
tricky rick: wtf frank
eyeliner boi: i'LL hAvE yOU KNOW THAT EYELINER IS VLAYSAS SDSAS SHIT
fro: im sorry what was that
dal the pal: stroke
milky: NONE OF THOSE NAMES ARE CLASSY FRANK
CONDOM NO: what abt me
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and me
frnk: your names are classy already
CONDOM NO: o ok
tricky rick: CONDOM NO isnt classy
bae: but this man totally tops goddamn and what a top is
CONDOM NO: I WILL REMIND YOU WE HAVE FUCKED TWO DAMN TIMES
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and we intend to do it again ;)
joosh: so are you gay together or something
CONDOM NO: fuck buddies?
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idk lets go with that
CONDOM NO: ok
frnk: so whos bringing the alcohol its harder to get than weed
bae: ill do it my dad has a stash of it in the basement
eyeliner boi: any vodka
bae: hell yeah
frnk: well then whos got the weed
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: who do you think
tricky rick: brendon
CONDOM NO: brendon
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wtf b
CONDOM NO: its true tho
joosh: ok well then ill order pizza
CONDOM NO: put it on my tab they know who i am
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: papa johns?
CONDOM NO: daddy ;))
tricky rick: NO
milky: BLOCKED AND REPORTED
Chapter 11: there's enough people here brendon why would you do this
Billie, Mike, and Tre of Green Day show up.
CONDOM NO: i have like four fuckin bags of weed
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: snack size?
CONDOM NO: NO! fucking freezer bags
CONDOM NO: i had to suck off the weed dealer for the fourth one sorry ry
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: its ok b
frnk: who is your weed dude anyway?
CONDOM NO: some guy named tre cool
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: sounds like a fake name
CONDOM NO: it is
bae: wait tre?? tre cool?
fro: yeah thats what he said
bae: his boyfriend is mike dirnt
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: theyre gay together?? i thought billie was with tre
CONDOM NO: lets fuckin ask him then
tricky rick: NO BRENDON
>> CONDOM NO has invited bob the billder, mike dirt, and tree is very cool to the chat!
tricky rick: NO WE HAVE ENOUGH PEOPLE BRENDON WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS
CONDOM NO: stfu patrick HELLO WEED FRIENDS
tree is very cool! HELLO WEED BOY THANKS FOR THE BJ
bob the billder: hELLO!!!
mike dirt: billie pls calm down
bob the billder: nO
eyeliner boi: BILLIE! TRE! MIKE! AYEEEEE
tree is very cool: AYEEEEEEEE
bob the billder: AYEEEEEEE
mike dirt: AYEEEEEEEEEE
eyeliner boi: wait how u no who i am
tree is very cool: eyeliner boi?
mike dirt: who else could it be
bae: gonna need some ice for that burn
mike dirt: ty frank gerard ty
frnk: wait how did u know
bob the billder: youre v obvious frank
tree is very cool: and we can guess we have brains you know
frnk: oh they didn't explode from all the weed? huh
tree is very cool: suck my fucking dick
bae: UM NO I AM THE OWNER OF THE ONLY DICK HE CAN SUCK TYVM
tree very cool: calm sir i only suck billies dick
mike dirt: AND MINE EXCUSE ME
tree very cool: oh fine you too
milky: so are you a threesome
mike dirt: polyamory
eyeliner boi: THREESOME
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: THREESOME
tree is very cool: if you want us at ur party i wanna hear you all say polyamory
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: threesome
mike dirt: not coming
CONDOM NO: NO WAIT POLYAMORY
bob the billder: thank you NOW THE REST OF YOU THOTS
bae: fiiiine polyamory
frnk: if gees doing it im doing it polyamory
eyeliner boi: polyTHREESOMEamory
bob the billder: close enough thx pete
milky: polyamory fiiiiine
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: OMFGS DOES IT MATTER
tree is very cool: yES IT MATTERS FUCKING SAY IT TYVM
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: fiiiine polyamory happy now?
mike dirt: yes
Chapter 12: lit as tiT
Based off of real conversations I have with my friends. Oof.
PART TWO of the New Years Eve fiasco. More interesting than chapter 10's shit.
frnk: tonight's gonna be fun
tree is very cool: well as long as brendon kept hold of that weed i gave him
CONDOM NO: may have smoked some yesterday
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: fUCK BRENDON HOW MUCH
CONDOM NO: a bag???
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU FUCKASS
tree is very cool: its ok i can always bring more
dal the pal: niceee
dal the pal: btw wheres billie
eyeliner boi: sssSSSSUP SISTERS ITS PETE WENTZ
frnk: nO FUCK OFF
frnk: PATRICK WHY ARE YOU DATING THIS DUMBASS
tricky rick: idek hes cute when hes not high which is maybe an hour a day
eyeliner boi: tru tru
mike dirt: hello i am here
bob the billder: hE BROUGHT ME TOO WHASSUP MOTHERFUCKERS
mike dirt: billie...
mike dirt: pls calm down
bob the billder: k mike
tree is very cool: ANYWAYS
tree is very cool: i just snorted powdered sugar
tree is very cool: AND MY NOSE IS RUNNING LIKE OMF
CONDOM NO: sounds lit can i come over?
tree is very cool: pls do
bob the billder: mike cant talk rn as he is fussing over tre
tree is very cool: is nice
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: im sure
CONDOM NO: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING ABOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP RYAN HMMMMMM
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: legit nothing at all
dal the pal: wait. are you guys together or something? i didnt get a straight answer last time
joosh: no hetero
bob the billder: *gay answer you misspelled it dally my boy
>> bob the billder has changed dal the pal's name to dally!
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idek really we fuck?? but thats about it
CONDOM NO: yeah its kinda fuck buddies
dally: it doesnt make either of you triggered?
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: no y would it?
dally: idk i never understood the whole fuck buddies thing
Chapter 13: party party pAPRTATYGRAVY
what really happened at the party- part one
shit goes down
CONDOM NO: YO WHERE TF ARE YOU GUYS THE PARTY STARTS IN 10
tricky rick: yeah, in ten so you can wait brendon
CONDOM NO: pETE TALK SOME SENSE INTO YOUR BOYFRIEND I HAVE WEED TO SMOKE
eyeliner boi: weed? sICK COME ON PATRICK
tricky rick: PETE NO
eyeliner boi: pETE YES
tricky rick: fine we're coming brendon
CONDOM NO: HELL YEAH
CONDOM NO: RYAN WHERE ARE YOU
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: i am literally at your door rn bren
CONDOM NO: its open
tricky rick: we're here
eyeliner boi: WE'RE HERE!
tricky rick: yeah i just said that
eyeliner boi: LETS GO THERES WEED IN THERE
tricky rick: you fucking tripped wtf pete
eyeliner boi: r00d
tree is very cool: yEE IM COMING WITH MY BITCHES
CONDOM NO: GOT ANY BOOZE?
tree is very cool: HELL YEAH
mike dirt: pls stop yelling
tree is very cool: nO
bob the billder: YO YO YO IM AT BRENDONS WHERE ARE YOU FUCKERS
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: coming im picking up dallon
CONDOM NO: CANT HE WALK WITH THOSE LONG ASS LEGGOS
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: cOME ON DALLON I WANNA GET HIGH
dally: fine fine jesus ryan
bob the billder: yall sound like an old married couple
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: dALLON
dally: WTF RYAN CALM DOWN IM FIXING MY HAIR
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU LOOK FINE LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: okay dallon finally got his ass in the car are yall there
CONDOM NO: 'yall'
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: stfu hoe
joosh: IM HERE BRENDON OPEN THE DOOR
CONDOM NO: ITS OPEN
joosh: NO ITS NOT
joosh: I TRIED
CONDOM NO: TRY NOW
joosh: o ok thx
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WERE FINALLY HERE (DALLON)
dally: stfu i want beer
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WELL YOU WOULD HAVE HAD SOME WAY EARLIER IF YOU HAD MOVED YOUR ASS WHEN I SAID TO
dally: stfu i do what i want
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: dont fucking die
tricky rick: nO PETE STOP BACKFLIPPING OFF STUFF
eyeliner boi: NO FUCK U
dally: i do what i want
Chapter 14: pls dont get shitfaced OH NO HE GOT SHITFACED
part two of three of the partyTM
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
CONDOM NO: wheres frank and gee arent they here too
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: idk havent heard from them
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: also how are you not shitfaced yet
CONDOM NO: this is dallon
CONDOM NO: i lost my phone i think billie took it
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: billie
bob the billder: yEshseshe
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: oooooh kay
tree is very cool: yeah billies HAMMERED but im just hihg so
tree is very cool: excuse me hooker did i ask u
CONDOM NO: itbs brbendon dalon dstole mey bhone
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: hes shitfaced
eyeliner boi: BRENDONE WERES THE WEEDE
tricky rick: NO
eyeliner boi: YESJ
eyeliner boi: wait josh tyler is here for some rfukcin reason
CONDOM NO: I HAVE IT
>> this man totally tops goddamn and what a top has changed eyeliner boi's name to WEEDE!
>> this man totally tops goddamn and what a top has changed CONDOM NO's name to brendone
WEEDE: fuk u ryan
brendone: fuck me
tricky rick: NOPE NO BYE BITCH
>> tricky rick has removed brendone from the chat!
WEEDE; thansk patrick
tricky rick: <33
joosh: hes here waht do i doooo
tricky rick: are you wasted
tricky rick: good
mike dirt: biLLEI DONT TAKE MEY FOEN WHTF
bae: WHASSUP FUCKERS
frnk: hye bitches
WEEDE: HELLO FRENS
frnk: pass the weed dude i want some too
WEEDE: get brendon back here patrick
tricky rick: uGHHHHHH
tricky rick: fine
>> tricky rick has invited brendone to the chat!
brendone: TRICKY RICK WAHSSUPPPPPP
tricky rick: no pls
tricky rick: PETER LEWIS KINGSTON WENTZ THE THIRD WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU
tricky rick: pls dont b as shitfaced as i think you are
mike dirt: HE IS
tricky rick: * sighs *
tricky rick: FUCK
frnk: wht babe
bae: GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN JOSH AND TYLER
tricky rick: nooo...
frnk: OH SHIT THEYRE MAKING OUT HELL YEAH
tricky rick: oh shit
tree is very cool: GUESS WHO ELSE IS MAKING OUT
mike dirt: NOT NOW TRE
frnk: RYAN AND DALLON ARE MAKING OUT IN THE CORNER HOLY SHIT
brendone: well i have had a good life
im a mess, im a loser im a hater im a user...
but mostly a mESs
Chapter 15: the aftermath
SORRY I WAS GONE SO LONG AND THIS IS SHORT BUT I CANT DEAL WITH RYDELLON DRAMA
Brendone: RYAN IS THERE ANYTHING YOUD LIKE TO SAY
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: yes I have a headache
dal the pal: sameeee
WEEDE: y'all made out last night
dis bich no fun: yALL
WEEDE: EAT MY ASS MUKEY
dis bich no fun: MUKEY WTF IS A MUKEY
>> tricky rick has changed dis bich no fun's name to mukey!
Mukey: I will destroy you
Tree is very cool: I EAT ASS I EAT ASS I EAT ASS
Bob the billder: yeah he does ;)))
Mike dirt: biLLIE
frnk: um what did Ryan do
Tricky rick: well he almost got alcohol poisoning
WEEDE: AND THEN HE AND DALLON SUCKED FACE
brendone: WTF RYAN
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: WTF PETE
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: wait brendon why are you so upset
brendone: MAYBE BECAUSE WERE IN A FUCKING RELATIOBSHIP
dal the pal: shit sorry gotta kms
>> dal the pal has left the chat!
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: may I remind you we were never in a relationship To start with
Bob the billder: ummmm Brendon he's kinda right
brendone: SHUT THE FUCK UP BILLY
Bob the billder: * gasp *
>>. Bob the billder has removed brendone from the chat!
Bob the billder: come back when you can fucking spel
Mike dirt: that was spelled wrong
Bob the billder: ur lucky I love you
Mike dirt: aw thx billy
Bob the billder: GOODBYE THOT
>> bob the billder has removed mike dirt from the chat!
Bob the billder: motherfucker
tricky rick: ARE WE ALL JUST GOING TO IGNORE THE FACT THAT DALLON SAID HES GONNA KILL HIMSELF
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: I'm gonna find him make sure he doesn't do anything stupid and shitty
brendone: yeah cause you're dating him not me
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: Brendon... Please.
-- IN ANOTHER CHAT AND ITS JUST RYAN AND BRENDON --
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: bren... I think we both knew this was gonna blow up in our faces.
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: and we were never in a relationship in the first place, more like friends with benefits, you know?
brendone: yeah... i love you though ryan and I know we were never really official but I still do
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: I'm sorry bren
Brendone: it's ok. you and dal will make a really fucking cute couple
Brendone: plus threesomes
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: BRENDON
Chapter 16: DEEPTHROAT
I wrote this during church
brendone: SO APPARENTLY ITS NOT "PROPER" TO DEEPTHROAT A PUSH POP IN FRONT OF THE #HOT SECURITY GUY
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: Brendon wtf
tricky rick: Jesus
WEEDE: what flavor was it
mukey: thats what you're concerned about?
brendone: it was blue raspberry
WEEDE: yeah that's ok bUT I like bubble gum better
bob the billder: I AM THE LORAX I SPEAK FOR THE WEED
Mike dirt: oh billies awake perfect he can suck my dick again
Tree is very cool: y'all should have seen the shit we pulled last night at the party
frnk: yeah shit went down it was gr8
bae: you heard from a vvv drunk tre that I was leaving you so you drank three cans of beer climbed in the oven and sobbed
tree is very cool: yeahhhh that was a highlight of the night
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: what abt the threesome between mike billie and tre
Mike dirt: a+ dick sucking
tricky rick: tmi
>> WEEDE has changed tricky rick's name to lunchbox!
lunchbox: dear god why
WEEDE: I'm bored
lunchbox: of course you are
brendone: Peter we must talk
WEEDE: the hell you want h0
brendone: bubblegum push pops are gross
WEEDE: BITCH TAKE THAT SHIT BACK
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: where's Dallon he can fix this
WEEDE: TAKE IT BACKKKKK
>> lunchbox has invited dal the pal to the chat!
dal the pal: Brendon I'm so sorry
brendone: it's okay ry explained it to me I get it
dal the pal: thank god there's no clusterfuck
lunchbox: unless you count pete and Brendon arguing over push pops
WEEDE: BUT THE CONTRAST FROM THE PINK TO YOUR LIPS IS HOTTT
brendone: BITCH THT IS INCORRECT BLUE RASPBERRY IS THE SHIT ITS SO MUCH BETTER LOOKING AND TASTING
mike dirt: like my dick
bob the billder: you know it ;))))
tree is very cool: come over to my house
tree is very cool: nO not you mike and Billie so i can suck mikes dick again
tree is very cool: cuz I do NOT remember doing it last night
lunchbox: can we go back to the fact that Brendon thinks deepthroat is a word
brendone: BUT ITS A SONG
brendone: hUmp mE
Tree is very cool: FUCK ME
WEEDE: DADDY BETTER MAKE ME CHOKE
dal the pal: save us
Bob the billder: LICK LICK LICK LICK I WANT TO EAT YO DICK
mike dirt: why thanks billie ;))))
Chapter 17: kim kardashian hollywood
DAMN IM PRODUCTIVE TODAY
dal the pal: I'm gonna fucking kill brendon in about a half second
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: oh lord what happened
brendone: DALLON IS PLAYING THE KIM K GAME ON HIS PHONE
dal the pal: YOU FUCKING BITCH ASS HOE
WEEDE: o dear
lunchbox: the Kim kardashian Hollywood game? smh
Tree is very cool: Billie and mike played it at one point
Bob the billder: ngl it was a great game
Mike dirt: you married me on it
Bob the billder: i wanted to marry tre too but he didn't get the game
Tree is very cool: not enough storage
dal the pal: what??
Tree is very cool: let's just say hentai is h0t
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: YOU DOWNLOADED HENTAI PORN ONTO YOUR PHONE TRE WTF
tree is very cool: in my defense gay hentai is hard to come by
WEEDE: HEARD OF PORNHUB
tree is very cool; ITS HARD TO FIND GOOD GAY HENTAI THESE DAYS
mike dirt: just call me I'll get you off ;))))
tree is very cool: noted thx mike
>> WEEDE changed mike dirt's name to tre's personal pornhub!
tre's personal pornhub: thanks pete
dal the pal: I can't believe you exposed me bren
brendone: did it for the vine
tre's personal pornhub: are none of yall gonna say threesome
tre's personal pornhub: anyone but you pete pls
lunchbox: wait googling
lunchbox: according to the official kim k game wiki you can be in relationships with as many people as you want
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: welp patrick has it on his phone too
lunchbox: RYAN NO
WEEDE: PATRICK YOU FUCKER
WEEDE: wait ryan is he in a kim k relationship with somebody
this man totally tops goddamn and what a top: no surprisingly
lunchbox: i hate you all
>> WEEDE changed lunchbox's name to the kim k wiki!
the kim k wiki: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
Chapter 18: the kim k game wiki has left the chat!
dal the pal: hello motherfuckers
>> brendone has changed his name to ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;)!
lunchbox: wtf is that font
WEEDE: bitch i want that
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): you fucking wish pete youll never find my secrets
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): MIKEY YOU BASTARD
WEEDE: HAHAHAHAHHA BRENDON YOU TWOFACED SLUT I HAVE IT
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): BITCHHHH
bob the billder: i think its time we had a change up
>> bob the billder has changed dal the pal's name to daldo!
daldo: fuck you
>> bob the billder has changed this man is a top goddamn and what a top's name to ryroo!
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): aww thats cute
daldo: oof yeah
ryroo: fuck you
>> bob the billder has changed their name to 50% weed!
the kim k game wiki: WTFFF
>> WEEDE has changed their name to meme wentz!
meme wentz: yas fuck it up billie
50% weed: y thank you peter
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): pillie
>> the kim k game wiki has left the chat!
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): what?
daldo: YOU FUCKING IDIOT BRENDON WHAT THE HELL
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): WHAT DID I DOOOO
50% weed: omf im stupid but jesus christ brenodn
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW MISSPELLING MY NAME HUH BILLY
50% weed: * gasp * I THOUGHT WE TALKED ABOUT THIS
ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;): FUCK YOU
>> 50% weed has changed ᗪ卂ᗪᗪㄚ Ҝ丨几Ҝ ;)'s name to brenodn!
brenodn: YOU MOTHERFUCKER
meme wentz: IM TRYING TO FIND PATRICK
meme wentz: HE WONT ANSWER MY TEXTS OR MY CALLS
daldo: brendon oh my god
meme wentz: brendon youre gonna die when i find patrick
>> meme wentz has invited the kim k game wiki to the chat!
meme wentz: PATTY
the kim k game wiki: PETEY
daldo: yay theyre reunited
the kim k game: AND NOW IM GONNA KILL BRENDON
Chapter 19: last fic i expected to die
50% weed: we need to spice shit up in here
>> 50% weed has changed the Kim k game's name to cute potato!
>> 50% weed has changed meme Wentz's name to emo potato!
>> 50% weed has changed daldo's name to tall potato!
>> 50% weed has changed their name to rocker potato!
>> rocker potato has changed tre's personal pornhub's name to bass potato!
>> rocker potato has changed tree is very cool's name to drum potato!
>> rocker potato has changed bae's name to goth potato!
goth potato: bitch
tall potato: you ain't a fuckin rocker
rocker potato: stop being a dream breaker
>> rocker potato has changed mukey's name to salty potato!
Salty potato: BISH YOU WISH
>> rocker potato has changed frnk's name to short potato!
short potato: are you quite finished
cute potato: Awwww thanks billie
rocker potato: ur welcome pat :)
emo potato: hEY NOW
goth potato: I don't like my name
rocker potato: OH WAIT
>> rocker potato changed ryroo's name to scarf potato!
>> rocker potato changed breodn's name to gay potato!
Rocker potato: k we good now
Bass potato: no billie
Drum potato: yES billie
emo potato: wtf tre youre not billie
Gay potato: ur not wrong billie
Scarf potato: FUCK I LOOK GOOD
Tall potato: hmmmmmm k
Scarf potato: * gasp * UR SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE YOU WHORE
cute potato: no dont fight pls
Rocker potato: yeah you guys are scaring pat
Emo potato: aw HELL no
Emo potato: only i can call him pat fuck off billie
Bass potato: hey now is petey jealous
Salty potato: pete you look stupid just let it be
Emo potato: FUCK OFF MIKEU
drum potato: omfg pete
Rocker potato: TRE NO
>> drum potato has changed salty potato's name to mikeu!
mikeu: pete ur so protective wtf billies just pats friend lmao
emo potato: YOU DONT FUCKING GET IT DO YOU BILLIE YOU FCKTARD
>> emo potato has left the chat!
rocker potato: wtf?? what did i do
cute potato: hes protective it's okay billie
tall potato: wtf why you love him Patrick
cute potato: he just gets convinced that I'll leave him that hes not good enough
scarf potato: but like... U wouldn't
cute potato: exactly! he just doesn't think that
goth potato: what??? but he's like
goth potato: a fukin emo legend
Drum potato:'so r u gonna tell him ur breaking up in person or what
Cute potato: tRE WERE NOT BREAKING UP OMF
scarf potato: yeAH IN PERSON * cough cough * bREN
Gay potato: YOU WERE OUT OF TOWN WTF WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO RYAN
scarf potato: CALL ME????
gay potato: aNYWAY holy fuckin shit peterick was the last ship I expected to die
cute potato: fuck you lot im adding pete in again
>> cute potato has invited emo potato to the chat!
Rocker potato: YO PETEY PIE PATRICK HERE HAS TO TELL YOU SOMETHING
bass potato: OMF BILLIE NO
drum potato: heard y'all are breaking up
Mikeu: tre no
Emo potato: wtf?? pat?
Cute potato: no Pete it's not what u think
Emo potato: u fuxking kidding me rn? couldn't tell me in person could you??
Cute potato: Pete please I'm trying to tell you
Emo potato: seems to me I already know
Emo potato: thanks Patrick
>> Cute potato has left the chat!
Bass potato: PETE THIS IS TRES FAULT
Drum potato: i resent that
Bass potato: stfu
Gay potato: TRE JUST ASSUMED THAT YOU AND PATRICK WERE BREAKING UP BUT ITS NOT TRUE
bass potato: CUZ UR ALL PROTECTIVE N SHIT CUZ INSECURITY IS A BITCH AM I RIGHT
short potato: u sir are correct
tall potato: darn tootin
gay potato: dallon...??
tall potato: darn tootin
Scarf potato: tRE NO
>> drum potato has changed the chat name to darn tootin!
Tall potato: sooooo fuck me in the ass cause I love jesussss
Gay potato: can I get an amen
Drum potato: a WOman
Rocker potato: feminism
Chapter 20: peterick ain't dead yet hoes
Pete Wentz has invited Patrick Stump to the chat!
Pete Wentz: would you like to explain what's going on rn
Patrick Stump: Pete, I don't wanna break up with you. Tre assumed we were after you left the chat the first time.
Patrick Stump: and I love you, Pete, but that was a dick move.
Pete Wentz: I know, I'm sorry
Patrick Stump: you had better fucking be
Pete Wentz: I just thought you had finally realized that Billie is better than me.
Patrick: he's not, and I love you, Pete. Nothing will ever change that.
Pete Wentz: love u patty
Patrick Stump: call me patty again and I'm gonna really dump ur ass
Pete Wentz: no patty im sorry
Patrick Stump: I'm going to kill you.
Chapter 21: backstreet's back (alright)
Tre meth can kill you
Goth potato: BITCH WE HAVE NEWS
Cute potato: you better have a damn good reason for waking me up motherfucker
Drum potato: GASP PATRICK WE DONT USE THOSE WORDS HERE
bass potato: yo tre just dropped his phone and swore like a drunk sailor
Cute potato: hahahaha suffer
emo potato: ANYWAYYYYY
BRENDON GOT A JOB AT KINGS DOMINION
rocker potato: that fuckin like amusement park type shit?
emo potato: YES HES YELLING AT PEOPLE AND HES ONLY BEEN HIRED FOR 15 MINUTES
gay potato: tHESE FUCKING PEOPLE WONT PUT THEIR SEATBELTS ON
scarf potato: suffer MORE
tall potato: I want a new name
bass potato: don't kill anyone Brendon
drum potato: ha I hope he does that would be funny
>> tall potato has changed their name to tree!
Short potato: I wake up to this r u fucking srs
>> tree has changed short potato's name to oreo!
oreo: R U FUCKING KIDDING ME
>> tree has changed bass potato's name to muke!
tree: before u ask
I am out of ideas
oreo: LET ME DO THIS
>> oreo has changed rocker potato's name to pottos!
pottos: r u fucking srs rn
oreo: STEALING LINES ARE WE
pottos: FUCK OFF
I SPELLED POTATO WRONG ONE TIME AND NO ONE LETS ME FORGET IT
scarf potato: you spelled potato wrong in an English essay and handed that shit in bitch
muke: didn't the teacher fail u for that
potto: none of ur fucking business mike
>> potto has changed their name to asshole!
asshole: theeeeeeere we go uh huh
gay potato: snap snap snap
>> muke has changed asshole's name to billie!
billie: ok well this works too
>> billie has changed gay potato's name to whore!
Whore: fuck youuuu hoo hoo hoo
Tree: IS THAT FUCKIBG CEELO GREEN
Billie: I SEE U DRIVING ROUND TOWN WITH THE BOY I LOVE AND IM LIKE
whore: FUCK YOUUUUU
drum potato: HOO HOO HOOOOO
emo potato: hey
There's a new kid at school also named billie
Whore: shall we add them in
tree: oh shit
>> whore has invited bad guy to the chat!
bad guy: what the actual fuck
What is this
tree: i jUST SPILLED MY APPLESAUCE
whore: I'll come lick it off u ;))
tree: do not
muke: CAN WE GET ANOTHER FUCKING ROLL CALL
whore: U ALREADY FUCKIN KNOW BITCH AYE
but it's Brendon Urie
muke: well thank you for that and btw I'm mike Dirnt
tree: Dallon Weekes
scarf potato: Ryan Ross
Emo potato: Pete WENTZ!
oreo: Frank Iero
Drum potato: tré cool bitch
Billie: Billie Joe Armstrong
tree: and Patrick and some other people r prob here but they ain't talkin
Hey new buddy what r ur pronouns
bad guy: I'm billie eilish
but people say I'm billie o'connell
i use they/them as i am agender
billie: oh hey what's up
bad guy: wait
r u like
the billie joe armstrong
the one who
muke: smokes an obscene amount of weed
Has threesomes with me n tre regularly
That's him alright
drum potato: dyed his hair pink for a dare
93.2256% of the time is either drunk/high
Did meth w/me once
muke: U FUCKING DID METH TRE BILLIE WHAT THE FUCK
emo potato: one I want a new nickname
Two that sounds lit as TIT
Cute potato: Pete you're not doing meth.
Billie: wow y'all know eeeeeeeverything
muke: tre meth can kill you
>> drum potato has changed his name to death by meth!
Death by meth: welcome back to hell