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Every Dog Has His Day

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Aqua had an idea.

Kazuma watched it take shape at a glacial pace. First, at the breakfast table, she was unusually quiet. Both pupils fixated out the window. Like she was listening.

Kazuma chewed and decided not to interrupt.

Later that day, Darkness brought it to Megumin’s attention. “Aqua is acting strangely.”

They watched her fold her arms and touch her chin pensively, gazing across the field and directly into the sunrise.

In the afternoon, Megumin tugged Kazuma’s sleeve. “Kazuma, Kazuma!”

“That’s me.”

She cupped her hand and whispered, “I think something’s wrong with Aqua.” She pointed.

They watched Aqua watch the grass at her feet. Hands on her hips, dimple tucked into her cheek.

At dinner, Aqua spoke. “Who watches the house while we’re on quests?”

Darkness halted, fork part way to her open mouth.

Megumin turned her stuffed cheek to look at Kazuma.

Kazuma, mouth full, chewed, “Uh… No one.”

Aqua decided, “We should get a guard dog.”

Megumin swallowed and smiled, “A puppy? Oh, I like this idea!”

Darkness sat up taller, eyes twinkling with excitement. “I’ll write a letter to my father! He’s patron of an Eris Abbey with a whole stable of elite guard hounds!”

Kazuma, still staring at Aqua, agreed, “That was actually a good idea.”

“Thanks! It took me all day!”

It didn’t matter. They had witnessed a miracle.


Several days later, Kazuma picked up his coffee mug and wandered into the foyer. He rubbed at his blurry morning vision and stopped to admire the new doggy door. They were expecting a big dog. So they made a door that even Megumin and Kazuma could squeeze through. This would be a good guard dog.

Kazuma stepped onto the patio for his morning relaxation.

A stranger shouted, “I have your delivery, Sir Kazuma!”

He looked at the blurry man, then the blurry horse beside him.

Kazuma sipped his coffee. “Cool.” He patted the horse.

He didn’t remember ordering one. That was fine.

“Go ahead and put it over-“ The horse licked him. Its tongue dragged across his whole torso and face, and stole his coffee. It panted like a dog.

Megumin stepped out of the door and shouted, “Puppy!”

Darkness came close behind, armored footsteps stomping as she ran. She shouted, “Mel!”

Kazuma wiped dog saliva from his face. Megumin stood behind him for safety.

Darkness jumped forward and wrapped her arms around the dog’s neck.

“Oh my gosh, it’s Mel! I remember when you fit in my lap, you big ol’ silly pooch!”

Mel panted happily.

Kazuma noted a shiny plate on its collar, an adventurer card. He reached out and held it.

And there was Mel’s name: Mel.

Mel’s Race: Dog.

Height, Weight, Strength, Level, Skills…

Kazuma asked, “Bark? Really? That’s a skill?”

“Oh, Bark turns the undead,” Darkness explained. Her passion for dogs shone through a smile. And she grabbed Mel’s cheeks playfully. “Isn’t that right, you big, beautiful doggo? You can turn the undead! Yes, you can!”

Mel swung his tail like a giant scythe and panted the way whales eat plankton.

Megumin stepped forward and pet him. Mel leaned down and nuzzled her affectionately.

She squirmed and giggled, “Your nose tickles!”

Kazuma was too groggy to feel intimidated or playful or pensive. When the girls finished with Mel, and looked to him for an introduction, he did not play at being gushy or girly.

He sternly declared, “Now listen here, Mel. Men do not nuzzle each other, nor lick each other, nor drink each other’s coffee. Men shake hands.” Kazuma held his out.

Darkness frowned, “When did you become a father figure?”

Megumin giggled, “Kazuma I don’t think Mel can underst-“

Mel sat, straightened to attention, and gently shook Kazuma’s hand with a large paw.

Darkness beamed. “Eris Hounds are very intelligent. They have to be for when we have them at court! Oh, I wonder how the rest of them are doing.”

Kazuma checked the adventurer card for Mel’s INT stat. “Oh. That’s, uh… One point higher than Aqua’s.”

Aqua arrived, asking in sing-song, “I heard my Naaame- Eww, a dog.”

Mel wagged his tail harder. Megumin took cover behind Darkness.

Aqua stared. Pecking order hadn’t been established, so she didn’t know how to act.

Kazuma asked, “Hey, Lalatina-“ Darkness bristled at her name- “This adventurer card says that Mel is a follower of Eris. Are dogs even allowed in temples?”

“Yeah! We have a special Hound Abbey just beside the-“

Aqua stepped forward and swatted Mel with a newspaper. “Get off the porch! Strays go to the pound!”

Darkness and Megumin opened their mouths in horror.

Kazuma quipped, “They won’t take you. I already asked.”

Smack! Smack!

“Hey. Aqua.”


“Aqua? Stop hitting the dog.”

Mel bowed his head at the scolding. But the smacks were futile.

Aqua gave it one more smack.

Mel whimpered.

Darkness stepped forward. “Hey! You’re being really mean, Aqua! Mel’s being a very good boy, and you’re-“

Mel flicked out his tongue and licked Aqua’s face. She wrinkled up in disgust. Everyone else giggled.

Aqua scowled. “I changed my mind. No dog.” She stomped into the house.

Megumin watched her go, then wrung her hands and asked, “Aqua is really upset about Mel?”

Kazuma patted him. “Good dog.”


They broke up the duties. Darkness liked playing with Mel, so she took him for runs every evening. Megumin and Kazuma rode him out to explosion practice every morning. Aqua just had to bring him dinner every night.

One job.

And everyone had to yell at her, every night, to make her do it.

So Aqua grumbled, grabbed the food, dropped as much as she could on the way, and finally came outside an hour late. She shivered in her nightie. It was getting cold.

Mel usually sat upright beside his doghouse, wagging his tail as if they were friends.

This night, Mel was missing.

“Stupid dog,” Aqua grumbled. “Maybe it ran away,” she hoped.

She hurried to the dog house and set down the bowl. No one could blame her if the dog didn’t actually come to eat. It wasn’t her dog, after all. She could just slip back into bed, say she fed it, and play dumb in the morning.

But as she turned back to the house, she saw the dog at the front gate, head poked through the bars. It barked at something.

Aqua wandered over.

Mel barked again.

Aqua stuck her head through the gate and peered down the road. “Is that a girl dog?”

Mel wagged his tail.

The girl dog looked away.

Mel stopped wagging his tail. He barked.

No response.

Aqua sneered, “Sorry, Dog. I don’t think she’s interested.”

She tried to pull her head back, but hit the bars. She was stuck. “Ow! How do I-?” She pulled again, whacking her head a few times until she figured out how to rotate and get loose.

She fell back onto her rear and shook her head. “Stupid gate.”

She stood up, and her head bumped Mel’s underside.

Something poked the back of her head.

She turned around, and she was eye-to-eye with Mel’s fifth leg. She blinked in the darkness, took a moment to understand, and then understood.

That was a giant dog penis. Mel was staring at a girl dog and had a giant, shameless boner.

Aqua scrambled away from it. “Eww. Dirty, Eris-following, stupid dog. The girl dog isn’t even that pretty.”

Aqua stuck her head back through the bars. The girl dog was still there, still looking uninterested. Another male dog came out of the bushes, promptly mounted the girl dog, and started humping.

Mel whimpered.


Aqua laughed- truly burst like a dam, all spite released.

She pulled her head back and hit the bars again. “Ahaha- Ow! Stupid- dumb- gate, ow! Whew.”

She pulled her head free and pointed at Mel. “HA! I knew it! You’re an Incel! No-Life, Otaku, LOOOOSER!”

Mel pulled back from the fence and sadly sat with his head drooped.

Aqua gripped her belly and laughed harder. “You’re an even bigger looser than Kazuma! Do you even know how stupid you look? All that muscle and you can’t even get a girl dog to look at you! And you can’t even jack off into a sock or anything because you sleep naked outside like a poor person!”

She hadn’t had this much fun since Kazuma’s depression.

Mel lay down in the dirt and sighed.

Aqua wiped the tears from her eyes and finished laughing on her way back to the house. She couldn’t wait to tell Darkness that her Eris-following dog was a Beta Pushover Cuck.

She grabbed the doorknob and turned it.

It was locked.

From inside.

Aqua stopped laughing.

She jiggled the handle. Still locked.

She was locked outside. In the cold.

Was this Kazuma’s doing? Was he telling her to go sleep in the dog house? No, he would never do that. He needed her to defeat the Demon King. He needed her help. He wouldn’t hold a grudge about that whole winter where she insulted him for being an incel in two lifetimes, right? Maybe if she called out to him in her sweetest voice, he would-

She noticed the dog door. The small flap they’d installed before Mel the Giant Cuck arrived.

Aqua got down on her knees and eyeballed it. Megumin had squeezed through it, so people could fit, so Aqua could definitely fit. And that would get her inside without having to talk sweet to Kazuma.

She peeked her head through and searched the entryway. No one looking. Good. She didn’t want to get caught using a dog door.

She wedged an arm through, then another, and had her shoulders inside.

Her breasts gave her more trouble. This was not a problem Eris would have. Aqua wiggled until her boobfat wedged up against her and bloomed like squished balloons. She wiggled and squinted, in, in, in, until they flopped through and she could breathe again.

“Whew. Half-way,” she assured herself.

Her feet were getting really cold. She scooted forward on her hands until- thump- her hips hit the doggy-door’s sides. The whole door moved against its hinges, and the bump echoed into the house.

She held perfectly still, awaiting a response.

Down a long hallway, Megumin wailed, “Kazumaaaa? Are you sure we got all the ghosts?”

Oh no.

Kazuma sighed loudly. His bed creaked as he stood from it.

Aqua tried to thrust herself in. The door rattled again. She panicked and tried to ram her hips through the door frame. It wasn’t working. She couldn’t fit.

Thinking fast, she realized the best option was to be stuck outside.

She backed up until her breasts were stuffed into her face.

And then Darkness asked, “Aqua?”

She looked up. Darkness was in her nightie. Armor doffed, she made almost no sound against the carpet. How long had she been there?

Aqua forced a smile. “D-Darkness? Haha, Hi! Oh gosh, I was just, uh… Making sure this worked for our friend Mel!”

Darkness blinked. “It doesn’t. Mel can’t fit in it.”

“Oh. Right.” Aqua laughed nervously. “W-w-well, you see-“

“Did you lock yourself out?”

Kazuma’s bedroom door creaked open.

Aqua snapped. “Yes. Pull me out. Please. Hurry! Before Kazuma sees!”

Darkness sighed. “Here. Give me your arms.”

Aqua held them out, Darkness tugged, and together they strained against impossible odds.

Through the effort, Aqua grunted, “Its… Not… Working!”

Darkness slacked. “Alright. Let’s, uh… Push?”

Aqua nodded. Candlelight was bobbing down the hallway.

“Uh, Sorry,” Darkness offered. She put her hands on Aqua’s face and pushed. Aqua’s breasts mashed up against her, and she tried to wiggle her way back.

This was the scene Kazuma and Megumin walked in on.

Aqua saw them between Darkness’ fingers.

Megumin looked scared at first, clutching Kazuma’s tracksuit arm, peering out from behind him as if expecting terrors. Then she peered, confused, disgusted, as if at two humping dogs. Then she understood, and a look of utmost smugness washed over her.

Kazuma quipped, “Did Dustiness finally snap?”

Darkness stopped pushing. Her head swiveled across her shoulders, wide eyes finding them, blushing in embarrassment. “O-oh! Hi, guys. Uh…”

“I’m stuck,” Aqua said through her fingers.

Megumin asked, “Have you tried pulling?”

“Yes,” they both answered.

“Hmm.” Kazuma rubbed his chin.

Something licked Aqua’s toes. She wiggled.

“H-hey, uh, guys? I think-” Mel licked her foot again. “G-guys! I think the dog is, uh-“

“Hang on,” Kazuma interrupted. “I think I’ve read this doujin.”

“Guys, the dog is-“

Darkness spoke over her, ignoring her. “Kazuma, open the door. Then we can push from one side and pull from the other.”

Kazuma rubbed his chin. “Inu No Petto something?”

“Guys, it’s licking my toes!”

“Good idea, Darkness!” Megumin praised. “I’ll help you!”

“I don’t like this! Guys?”

Megumin opened the door, swinging Aqua awkwardly into the house. Mel wagged his tail and stepped up to the threshold. He was a good dog who knew better than to come inside. But he was also a compassionate dog who knew Aqua needed help.

He licked at her waist, stuck as it was and in need of slippery dog spit.

Aqua made a face that strongly indicated her disgust, discomfort, and disapproval. She wasn’t able to vocalize words, but something like a scream or a gargle escaped her. She whacked Mel’s nose with both hands.

Darkness patted Mel. “Good boy. You’re just trying to help, aren’t you?”

Megumin got behind Aqua. “Okay, Darkness. I’m gonna push now! Just, uh, gimme a sec to, uh… Find a place… To, uh… Aqua?”


“Aqua, it’s bad enough I have to put my hands on your big butt, but, uh… You really need to start wearing underwear.”

Aqua mashed her lips together so hard they wiggled and twitched. She mumbled, “All of mine is dirty, and you said I can’t-“

Kazuma snapped his fingers. “Inu no Petto wa Pantsu ga Arimasen!”

Megumin shouted, “SO WASH YOUR CLOTHES!”

She put her cold hands onto Aqua’s cheeks and heaved.

Aqua squeaked, and Darkness pulled, and the goddess slid on Mel’s spit- popping straight into the house. Megumin fell through the flap behind her and skidded in by her tiny frame. Her head came to rest on Aqua’s cheeks, where she admitted, “This does make a nice pillow though.”

Aqua’s friends had more grace than her. Over the next week, Kazuma only brought it up every time he lost his temper and ranted at her for being stupid. Megumin only made a joke about it once, while calling her fat. And Darkness just politely reminded her to take her key every time she set it down.

Mel sat upright beside his doghouse every night and wagged his tail, which Aqua interpreted as judgmental scorn.

Then, as often happens in a band of adventurers, the need arose for her to sneak away from the house. Alone. Night fell, and an elaborate plan of interlocking ruses was set into motion.

Aqua crept down the hallway undetected, feeling already the glee of pulling a fast one on the whole party. She made it to the entryway and faced her first challenge: The Door.

She remembered how loudly it had rattled when she tried to sneak in through the doggy door. How the main door creaked every time it opened.

It could make noise when she returned- she could cover for that. But it had to be perfectly silent and arouse no suspicion as she left. And therein lay the beauty of the plan. For while she could not fit going in to the doggy door, she could surely slip through it going out.

Aqua pursed her lips to hold back her diabolical giggle, got on all fours, and poked her head out the door. Mel was asleep in his dog house. Good. Aqua licked her lips and stuck an arm through the door, then another. She popped her shoulders through, and her breasts popped up easier than last time. It was working!

She scooted forward and- thump- her hips hit the doggy door.

Oh no.

It wasn’t working.

Inside, she heard Megumin call, “Aqua? Is that you again?”

Kazuma shouted, “Nobody help her this time.”

Which meant they were suspicious but not really sure it was her. They hadn’t seen her.

She tried to squeeze through again. Thump!

Mel sat up in his dog house. Then stood to all fours and stepped into the moonlight.

Aqua put a finger to her lips. “Shh!”

Mel whispered, “Woof.

“No! Shh!”



Mel plodded his way to her, whole body swaying with the lazy trot, and helpfully licked Aqua’s face.

She smacked his nose. “Go away!

Mel whimpered.


Mel turned around, big dick idly swinging under him, and plodded back to the doghouse. He resumed his napping position and stared at her.

Aqua tried to- thump, thump, thump- “Ugh! Stupid, dumb, block of wood!”

Mel stood up and grabbed something with its mouth, then plodded back to Aqua.

Aqua heaved a frustrated sigh. Mel dropped the leash in front of her.

“I’m not taking you for a walk, Idiot!” She smacked his nose.

Mel whimpered and nudged the leash at her.

“You Eris followers are so stupid, you know that? She stuffs her bra by the way.”

Mel didn’t have any languages on his adventurer card, but Aqua had recently acquired the skill Commune with Domesticated Animals.

She put her finger on Mel’s forehead. “I’m not going to walk you.”

Mel thought back, Pillow-Butt Take leash.




Pillow Butt Pls.

“NO! You stupid dog!”




Aqua huffed and picked up the leash by its handle. “There! Now wha-“

Mel grabbed the other end and tugged- THUMPSCHWOOP!- Aqua loose.

She flopped onto the dirt. “Yes! I did it!”

Mel licked her face.

Aqua smacked him. “Get off me, you stupid dog! You’ll blow my cover!”

Mel licked her.

Aqua put her finger on him. “Go away!”

Pillow-Butt open gate.


Girl dog.

Aqua sneered. “You want to find that girl dog?”


“She’s got a boy dog.”




“YES! You watched him humping her!”


Mel stopped wagging his tail.

“Because you’re an incel cuck!” Aqua smacked his nose. “And you’re blowing my cover! Stupid dog! No good, bad dog!”


Mel whimpered.

Aqua pulled her finger back. “Ugh. Go back to your doghouse. I have a secret mission. First I have to get Wiz and give her my house key so she can make a copy. Then, I have to-”

She grabbed at her hip. “-Where’s my key?”

She checked the ground. Her heart stopped.

She got on her knees and poked her head through the doggy door.

There it was! She’d dropped it squeezing through here.

She wedged an arm through and reached for it. Too far. She wedged in the other, and had her shoulders inside.

Her breasts gave her more trouble. Aqua wiggled until her boobfat wedged up against her and bloomed like squished balloons. She wiggled and squinted, in, in, in, until they flopped through and she could breathe again.

“Got it! Ha!”

She backed up. Thump!

Oh no.

Kazuma, Darkness, and Megumin all sighed loudly.

Mel licked Aqua’s foot. She kicked his nose. “Go away, stupid dog!”

Mel licked her butt.

Aqua tensed. The tongue had dragged from her knees to her back, like having a warm blanket of dog spit draped over her. Only, if Mel did that again he’d hit her- Mel did it again and slathered her vag.

Aqua’s eyes bulged. She kicked Mel’s face.

“Stop it, you stupid incel!”

Mel licked again, slower, harder, tongue wrapping between her legs and spreading the warm caress up her belly.

Aqua tried to squeeze forward and escape. Thump!

Kazuma shouted, “Aqua! Go to sleep!”

Mel’s nose stuffed into her rear, and she had to cover her mouth to not squeal. Hot breath misted up her micro-dress. This was the most humiliating and disgusting thing that she had ever experienced. She’d been blackout drunk for the other contenders.

She had to get out of this doggy door.

She whispered, “Mel!

Mel sniffed her crotch. Aqua shivered. Not from cold- Mel’s breath was warming her. Warmer than room temperature, actually. Warm on the inside, actually.

Aqua swallowed. This was not happening.

No Eris follower could ever make her feel like this.

Or dog.

H-hey, Mel?

Mel poked a smaller portion of tongue out- More precise- and licked exactly her mons. Aqua clamped her legs together, tight like she was trying to crush Kazuma’s head, or crush her own arousal. But with wideset hips, and presenting as she was, the next lick only had to lift her pliant cheeks and brush against her again. Her fat lips spread for the invader and traded wetness.

She had to talk her way out of this. Putting on the sweetest voice she had, Aqua cooed, “Nonononononoono. Mel. Mel, listen. Go find that girl dog! Shouldn’t you be with a girl who’s more your type?”

No reaction. No lick. No breath on her rear. Maybe Mel was listening.

“I bet you can do it! You can show up that other big dog and then it’ll be like a love story. You know, like a fairy tale. W-with a princess dog, and-”

Something poked her butt.


Hot fur slid over her back. A heavy paw wrapped around her waist and pulled her till her breasts mashed up into her face.

“M-Mel? Hey, don’t do anything a good dog wouldn’t do, okay?”

Again with the poke. Did Mel have a stick?

No, Aqua realized.

Mel had a dick.


“Nonono. Dog-”

Poke. Poke.

“Mel, listen. Remember that sweet girl dog who was so interested in you?”


She had to be quiet. Her options had dwindled to “Get fucked by an Eris follower” or “Get fucked by an Eris follower while everyone watches.”


She tensed again. If she could squeeze herself tight enough, Mel wouldn’t be able to penetrate her. Maybe he would give up.

She hadn’t read his adventurer card. The Hound activated his special skill, Barksman, and lined up the kind of shot that took down the Death Star.

Mel’s fat dick found the angle and thrust that it needed. The tip of his spear found anchorage in her bay and sank like a barrel of steak.

Aqua exhaled like she’d been struck in the chest, like all her organs had been scooted aside to accommodate her dick-stuffed vag. She didn’t inhale. She couldn’t.

Mel grumbled happily and thrust forward.


Megumin worried, “Kazuma, what if she’s stuck again!”

“I don’t care. She has to learn.”

“… ‘Kay.”

Mel pulled out and Aqua gasped for air. Her legs quivered, lust rattling her into submission. She replanted her hands nervously and took big breaths of worry. This was happening, and it was going to keep happening until Mel had avenged his frustration.

On the bright side, Aqua figured, at least she wasn’t stuck in that other universe with the goblin problem.

Mel thrust forward. Their combined weight slammed the door against its hinges. Thud!

She hadn’t felt this full since the last guild party. The churning in Mel’s tool felt like a bicep flexing. Inside her. Twitching gleefully.

Mel resumed panting, heavy, bathing Aqua’s back in drool and desire.

He adjusted his hind paws and wrapped a second forepaw around his new girl dog’s waist.

He gave another mini-thrust, bottomed out against Aqua’s other whore mouth, and she felt the volleyball-sized bump behind his fat sausage. She’d just gotten a kiss from Mel’s bitch-breaker.

Which made Aqua the Bitch, and the final event, The Breaking.

She whispered, “Oh no.”

Thrust. Thud!

“Oh no.” Thud!

“Oh No!” THUD!

The pace increased, stealing her breath and churning her pussy better than her fingers ever could. The door slammed against its frame like a giant tapping his foot, losing his patience.


Aqua mewled. She liked this. Her few rational thoughts got squeezed out by dick, and all that remained was her two whore holes moaning. If this kept up, Eris would have another convert.

The thought made her heart seize up. She was losing herself to this… This big, beautiful dick.

The thrusts reached deeper as her body adjusted. And being a water goddess helped with the lubrication. Each jerk reached farther into her body, poking her heart and softening her mind like a hard massage at a sauna.

Dog and Pussy drool soaked her like she’d been swallowed by a toad again. Mel’s paws gripped her skin, nails poking her tummy, and each hump made her thighs jiggle like Jell-O thrown at a wall.

Mel’s fuckstick reached deeper, and each rut clapped crotch to ass-cushions.

SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Paying back every time Aqua had swung a newspaper.

Her ass blushed red from the impacts, rippling across her skin and through her abs.

Then the fucking reached deeper. Mel shuffled his feet forward and pressed Aqua’s pillows into pancakes. The Bitch-Breaker battered at her entrance.

Mewls became howls. Aqua couldn’t cover her mouth. Reduced to a stupid slut, the goddess gushed through the gaps between cock and cunt, spraying her partner in submission and approval.

The Knott kissed her entrance again, and again, and was making a habit of getting part way in. Getting stuck in a doorway was about to be her secondary problem. She couldn’t formulate a “no,” even in thought. She hoped she was as good a ragdoll as Mel was a master.

That girl dog didn’t know what she was missing.

Aqua panted. The exertion was getting to her. Getting fucked this hard was hard. Enjoying it was harder. Mel’s hot fur rubbed Aqua’s skin raw. She’d wondered about the rough hands of her fellow construction workers. Her curiosity was beyond sated by the hound’s paw pads.

She pushed her ass higher, presenting herself like the guild was paying. Doggy Dong rubbed her G-spot, and her knees were too weak to keep the pose. Aqua’s arms gave out. Propping herself off the floor wasn’t possible with dick reaching all the way to her brain.

The knot slapping her inner-sanctum widened its gates and even her hips felt spaced. Her whole body was changing for this beast. She didn’t have anything like this across all of the Axis churches. Maybe Eris had better followers.

Mel’s next stroke pressed her just right, grinding that special spot just long enough to spark bliss, then longer to spread it like a blooming flower, then longer so lightning rippled off the petals and through her whole body like clouds, then LONGER, so she released a guttural and sultry wail into the house echoing around the foyer and confessing her inferiority.

Maybe Eris was a better goddess.

Aqua teared up against the floor. Not from the shame. That had long since overwhelmed her. Or it would when the knot did what knots do. She cried from relief. For a moment, she understood how relaxing it would be to admit inferior status and let Eris use her as a breeding hound forever.

Breeding. That was the whole point of this, wasn’t it? The reason Mel clasped her so tightly and pistoned her with the aggression of a plunger fucking a toilet.

Soon that fucking would stop. With their bodies tied together, this twitching dick would pump her full of baby batter and make her an Eris Bitch. Maybe she’d get a new adventurer card.

Aqua. Eris Follower. Girl Dog. Short, stupid, no human languages.

She wondered how many puppies she could throw per litter. Sweat dripped down her brow, and she grunted every time dog fur slapped her ass cushions. Another orgasm spasmed through her body, sudden and short, crossing her eyes and rocking her enough to shout incoherently.

SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! Echoed around in her skull, and counting the claps brought her back to awareness.

Her fat tits squeezed into the doggy door with her. And her engorged nipples pressed wet splotches into her dress. She’d milked herself. The doggy domination really was changing her. Converting her into a less useless goddess.

She squeezed a nipple, hard- pinching it like it was on a different whore that she hated- and watched her milk stain the fabric. It was the most erotic thing she’d ever seen.

She wondered if Kazuma would think lewd thoughts about it. If he would maybe dedicate one of his late night sessions to imagining her. Or was she really so low that she was beneath his lust? Below the standards of an otaku. Fit only for incel dogs.

Mel pulled out of her, fully disengaging, and she realized how much work he’d been doing, holding her up. Aqua’s hind legs collapsed, splaying wide, gaping her hole pouring fluids onto the porch.

She quaked and clenched, mini cramps wracking her body as she adjusted to not getting fucked like an ogre’s onahole.

And right as she made sense of that, being an independent person and formulating thoughts about getting unstuck- right as she put her arms under her- Mel poked her again.

Right on her asshole.

She rediscovered panic. Aqua clenched herself tight. It didn’t matter. She’d lubricated his cock and she would submit again. She would submit every time this hound mounted her or even wagged his cock at her. She knew that now. She would resist at first, of course. Just as she did now, willing her sphincter shut. But Eris’ beast followers had more willpower than her- About three points more. And with a little focus and perseverance, this dog would have its day with her however he wanted. All day. All night.

He could drag her into the dog house to sleep and make her suck him off for breakfast if he wanted. Aqua sucked her fingers, lost in the fantasy. Suddenly sympathizing with Darkness’ wilder streak. And as she lost focus, her ass loosened, and a lot of dick pierced her again, sliding in by grace of her other lubricants until the bitch breaker flaunted its girth to her flank.


Aqua tried to push herself up from the floor, but she was overheating, and her hands slipped on her sweat. She didn’t have oxygen. Her vision was fading into sparkly, white lights of bliss, blooming every time dog meat slid along her intestine.

And then the inevitable happened.


Mel stopped thrusting. It was done. Bitch secured. All that remained now was-

His dick twitched. Hot spunk gushed forth and shocked Aqua when it struck her insides. Like having hot chocolate appear in her stomach, warmth spreading as virile Eris Hound sperm stormed her temple. The whole of her religion was being defiled by a mutt. And she was drooling on the floor, eyes crossed, grunting.

Megumin yelled, “Kazuma? Are you sure we-“

“SHE HAS TO LEARN!” he screamed back.

Aqua held her belly, felt the twitching bump where dog-dick distended her. The bump grew as cum dumped into her. She wondered if she could get ass-pregnant. Honestly.

The bump grew, cock juice flowing through her the wrong way, and Aqua started to worry. If her stomach got too big, she’d be stuck in this doggy door all night.

Mel dismounted and turned around, still pumping cum, still knotted, dick still inside. He just fully rotated and chilled out, looking across the yard, appreciating the view while he spunked her gunk-hole.

Her cavern stretched to accommodate and the pressure increased on all sides. On her G-Spot even. She felt the pleasure, the vague intensity increasing there, and knew she was in for a third orgasm soon. She grunted in anticipation and tried to scoot away as if she could escape. Mel backed up with her letting her get most of the way into the house, so it was just her hips, now wider than before, keeping her pinned to the door.

Her belly grew and grew, seconds becoming minutes, until she was a gibbering jizz-berry in the lobby, moaning softly through an orgasm that wouldn’t end.

And yeah, her belly got broader than the doggy door. Her gut gurgled, and nut poured up into her tummy till she could smell it on her burps.

Mel stayed tied, enjoying the sensation of relief all thoughts of girl dogs purged from his mind enjoying the serenity of no longer being horny. He liked the night air and the way the dirt smelled today.

Aqua was getting a good whiff of carpet and sweat and gut spunk. At least she was more than half-way inside now. Her udders weren’t mashed up into her face anymore. Her hips, squeezed against the doorframe were starting to hurt. And her big belly looked pregnant.

Her eyes bulged at the thought. The realization.

The humiliation wasn’t over. It was only beginning. She was butt-pregnant with Eris Following puppies. Even if she escaped now, everyone would know what had happened. Still, she didn’t want to be stuck. She wanted to be in bed.

That wasn’t going to happen any time soon. She couldn’t get in or out without someone’s help. And she wasn’t going anywhere until Mel’s fat knot finished with her. She was tied to this Eris Hound as surely as if it had leashed her.

If only there was a useful goddess she could pray to.


She could reach Eris. She could just pray to Eris and Eris could order her hound to let her go.

Aqua thought very long and very hard about it. She could not do that and never do that. And maybe she would be caught by Kazuma and Megumin and Darkness with Eris’ Hound’s dick lodged so far up her ass it was tickling her tonsils.

If she prayed to Eris, the bra-stuffer would keep it secret. Because she was a subservient goddess to Aqua.


Aqua gulped. The clock on the far wall ticked away minutes. Wait, what? It was almost sunrise. Because of that nap she’d taken before sneaking out. Aqua was too tired to smack her forehead.

So there was only one way to get out of this. She clasped her hands together.

Mel smelled the night air and panted contentedly. There was very little that could move him from this spot of serenity. Damn he loved knotting snotty bitches. There’d been a little concern when he had to leave the Abbey. Like, what if there aren’t any ten-out-of-tens at the new place? Being top dog just isn’t as fun when you’re the only dog. He didn’t want to lose his edge. But at least he had this cum sock to drop his load in on the regular now.

So precious and enjoyable was this moment of clarity that only a call from his goddess could move him.

And oh, look, there she was at the front gate.

Eris waved.

Mel wagged his tail. “Woof.”

Eris put a finger to her lips.

Mel stayed quiet.

Eris showed him a treat.

And he though, Holy shit. Yes.

Problem: Being all knotted in this bitch, how could he run over there and get the treat? It wouldn’t deflate for another ten minutes at least. He sighed. Sometimes you just have to do things the hard way.

Now you might imagine that it’s painful to pull 90 pounds of dead weight by your ball sack. And you’d be right. But Mel had been summoned for treats, and he wasn’t about to keep his goddess waiting.

Stuck between a knot and a hard craving, he steeled his mind and chose the path of action. Mel’s focus in this moment was like that of a Monk experiencing nirvana. He summoned his will and heaved with all of his might.

Aqua’s eye’s bulged. This dog was squeezing her through the dog door like a tube of toothpaste. Pressure built under her stomach and up came the baby batter. Her throat filled with ball-slime and rushed into her mouth till she was swilling porridge.

She tried to force her lips closed, to hold onto one last piece of dignity. Another futile gesture.

Mel heaved, and the final tug surged every ounce through her at once. Aqua’s face-hole forced open, and she puked Rainbow Dog Nut Liqueur across the carpet as she suctioned back onto the porch.

Mel bolted for the gate, dragging her behind him by his fat dick, scraping her across the dirt and through some bushes till she slid to a stop at Eris’ feet.

Eris wore a light smile, welcoming and pretending not to be smug. “Aqua! I haven’t seen you in so long. How are things going?”

Aqua didn’t answer. Her cheeks burned with indignation. She looked away.

“I think there’s something on your lip,” Eris teased.

Aqua wiped rainbow spunk from her face, then a tear from her eye. “Just tell your stupid dog to get out of me.”

“I suppose I could, Aqua. But it’s been so long since we’ve caught up. Don’t you want to talk first?”

“No.” Aqua kept her face on the ground. She couldn’t stop crying. This was too humiliating.

“It’s just, I keep hearing these rumors. People think I stuff my bra for some reason. You wouldn’t know anything about the source of these rumors, would you, Aqua?”


“Well I hope that if anyone asks you about it, you’ll set the record straight. Just like I won’t tell anyone that Aqua is a doggy onahole. We goddesses have to look out for each other, right?”

Aqua sniffled. Her lips trembled.

Eris leaned over and patted her on the head.

“Do you understand, Aqua?”

“You won’t tell anyone about this?”

“And you won’t tell anyone I stuff my bra. Deal?”

Aqua nodded.

And Mel’s knot slid out of her effortlessly. Aqua gasped in relief, panting into the dirt.

Eris moved to her hound’s side and patted his cheek. Gleeful and malicious she murmured, “I like to answer two prayers a day.”