Chapter 1: Dreaming
Buffy tossed and turned in her sleep. Confusion and discomfort threatened to devour her form but somehow she can’t seem to pull away from the mirage that played in her sub-conscious mind.
‘How am I suppose to go on with my life?... Knowing what we had...what we could have had?’
‘You won’t. No one would know but me’, she hears Angel’s low voice rumbling gently, coaxing and comforting her.
Beside her, Angel began to stir; the ruffling of the silk sheets and race of Buffy’s heartbeat rousing the vampire from slumber. He turned to see her tossing with such vigour that it almost scared him to touch her.
‘I’ll never forget..I’ll never forget’ she heard herself say as she curled her arms around Angel’s broad shoulders. Her tears undulating down her cheeks showed no sign of impeding. She felt him pulling her impossibly closer and wrapping his arms around her so tight she could feel his heart thumping against her breast as she repeats herself over and over again. ‘I’ll never forget...I’ll never forget’.
Angel gently touched her shoulders and called out to her. No response. He tried again, this time shaking her, hoping to wake the love of his life.
Buffy gasped and abruptly woke, immediately sitting up, gasping for breath. Her heart racing, her breathing rapid, her chest heaved up and down as she took in large amount of air to fill her emptied lungs.
“Hey...are you okay?” Angel asked, his hands cupping her cheek and gently pulling her face towards his so he could read her.
Teary eyed, Buffy looked at him, willing herself to calm down and allowed herself slight reprieve -from the agony currently overwhelming her - upon seeing her love’s face. Seeing her wild and unfocused eyes only heightened Angel’s anxiety as he caressed her cheeks hoping to provide her comfort and in turn assuring his own self she was indeed okay.
“What’s wrong?” Angel asked again, his voice gentle wanting to soothe her as his other hand gently stroked her arm.
He could smell her fear, her erratic breathing and racing heart didn’t lessen his agony one bit. Still she didn’t say anything and just looked at him.
Ever so slowly, she shook her head and leaned towards him, wrapping her arms around his strong shoulders, burying her face in his neck. Angel’s arms immediately reciprocated and closing around his small lover, holding her tight, kissing her temple and letting his lips linger there.
“I just...I just had a bad dream”, she finally answered softly.
“You want to talk about it?”
He felt her shake her head. Experience taught him that a slayer’s ‘bad dream’ is something worth worrying about, even more so if the slayer in question is his and in an emotional turmoil after said dream.
He could still feel her heartbeat pounding against his chest and his arms only hugged her tighter. He gently coaxed her, caressing her back, soothing her, whispering comforting words in her ear like everything will be okay and that he’s always there for her.
Long moments later, he felt slight relief as her slowing heart rate indicated she was calming down. Still, he didn’t stop his ministrations. He gently laid her down back on the bed, caressing her face, staring into her eyes intently as he leaned down and kissed her forehead. He lay next to her and pulled her close draping his arm across her abdomen as he nuzzled her temple. Buffy curled in to him, her face resuming its place against his neck to breathe him in. After what seemed like long minutes, she fell asleep. Angel pulled slightly away to look down at her sleeping form as he absent-mindedly stroked her arm. He knew that the bad dream she had scared her more than she would admit. He wanted to know what it was about...what was it that scared her in the dream? Tomorrow….Tomorrow he would ask her. Right now, he was just glad she resumed dozing. She needed the rest after a hard day’s work and so did he. Kissing her temple one more time, he closed his eyes and allowed sleep to come.
The next morning, Buffy woke and as usual, greeting Angel with a kiss before starting her daily routine of getting ready for the day as though nothing happened. Angel was clearly confused and if Buffy’s pretence to appear unaffected by last night’s incident was to soothe his reservations, it only served to worry him tenfold. He had seldom seen her that frightened or shaken and her blatant efforts to remain tight-lipped cemented his worries.
He wanted to know what scared her. There had to be something in that dream that shook her. His eyes never left her as she shuffled around their room in that familiar pace he was accustomed to as she prepared herself for the day. He knew she knew he was closely eyeing her every move and to her credit, she portrayed no signs of the previous night’s agony as she went about choosing her outfit to her shoes to the washing of her face and brushing her teeth and to coiffing her hair and face. She did all that while successfully ignoring his scrutinizing gaze. But with the ability only a soulmate and man…err…vampire who has unconditional love for her, he easily noticed the faint, almost unnoticeable quiver in her voice masked behind the chirpy tone, the slight tremble of her hands as she brushed her teeth or combed her golden tresses and the gloom behind her beautiful hazel-green eyes.
Who was she kidding? This was Angel. He was as close to her as her own breath, her own heart, her very life and soul…no one could claim to know her better. That title would only belong to Angel and as long as she lives and breathes, he will always and forever be the champion of that. And because of the title, he is also certain that at this moment, she wasn’t ready to talk. She wasn’t ready to tell him what scared her. She would tell him when she was ready. He sighed and coaxed himself to allow her time and pushed himself to start his own routine.
After breakfast and kissing each other goodbye, they head off their separate ways; Buffy made her way to school and Angel off to Angel Investigations he re-opened a year ago.
Upon reaching her office, her charade she was slowly wearing down as Buffy sat down at her desk and looked at the clock which showed that it was almost 10. She had an hour before she was to meet her first student. When she woke up this morning, she was focused on not wanting to worry Angel so she went about her normal schedule of taking a shower, getting ready for work and having breakfast thinking it would convince him that she was okay. She scoffed at herself because she was pretty sure that it didn’t work. She is the love of his eternal life and the man has loved her for over 100 years…no other man had that title. It was impossible to fool him when it came to her. He probably played along because he knew that she wasn’t ready to talk or that she’s trying very hard to sweep the events under the rug. It was only a matter of time before her would question her.
She sat there deep in thoughts; last night’s dream playing vividly in her mind. The feelings she felt in the dreams were so real, as though she really was physically there feeling every bit of emotion. She wanted to brush it off as just a dream but how could she when deep down something was telling her it was more than your standard nightmare. As a slayer, she could to tell how some dreams were just harmless apparition of a heartfelt fantasy or if it was masked as a vision, foretelling an impending doom. But when a vision involved Angel, her mind was in a state of turmoil. The number of times she had any concerning him, it always had a tragic ending. She always lost him. But no, not this time. This time she was determined to keep him in her life. Not after everything that they went through. They deserve to be together. No, this time she won’t let him go nor allow anything to take the life they had together away. She would fight to keep him. No more sacrificing each other for the greater good. They’ve done that enough times to last them several lifetimes.
A knock on her door startled her. A familiar face was smiling at her.
“Jason”, Buffy greeted.
“Good morning Buffy. Penny for your thoughts?”
“Oh. It’s nothing”.
“No students to counsel today?”
“I’m actually meeting one of them in an hour”.
“Can we talk?”
Jason closed the door behind him before continuing,
“Um, I’ve been meaning to ask you something”.
Jason fidgeted, easily telling of his nervousness.
“Jason, is something wrong?”
“I won’t beat around the bush so I’ll just come out and say it”.
After taking a deep breath, he blurted, “Do you think we could go out for dinner some time?”
“Yeah. I mean we have great lunches together so I thought I’d like to see how dinner goes?”
“Dinner?...as in at night?...A…um date?”, she brings herself to ask, knowing that part of herself would wish the earth would swallow her whole, while the other half would be gravely relieved if her assumption was wrong.
Jason rubbed his neck sheepishly before replying “Um yeah...I guess I’m asking you out on a date”, he let out a chuckle to hide the tremble in his voice of asking his beautiful colleague of close to 2 years out.
‘Oh no’, Buffy thought. Buffy stayed silent, trying to find the right words to say.
“Jason...I...erm, I’m involved”, she finally said, deciding honesty was always the best policy.
Jason’s eyes widened. It wasn’t the answer he expected but was he surprised? Absolutely not. Anyone with eyes could see Buffy’s an attractive woman. He has seen the male (and some female) species of both the faculty and student population openly ogle her whenever she walks along the school halls. Is it an unconceivable wonder that she kept some lucky bastard’s bed warm at night? Most definitely not. He was justly disappointed and his mind scrambled to form coherent thoughts so words would come out of his mouth.
“Oh!...Okay, I’m embarrassed...Could we just rewind what I said and pretend it didn’t happen?” he finally said and began to walk away, not wanting to prolong Buffy’s pitiful and guilty gaze upon him nor hear any further words of her blatant rejection.
“No Jason, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. You couldn’t have known that I was involved. You’re a great guy. You just asked the wrong girl”, Buffy cajoled, his pace halted at the sound of her voice.
Jason turned and managed an awkward smile.
“Thanks”, he said, thankful for Buffy trying to smooth things over and know she genuinely meant about him being a great guy. It still didn’t soothe him though. He was about to turn away when he dared himself to ask,
“Your involvement...is it serious?” his voice hopeful.
Buffy didn’t say anything, letting her eyes answer. Jason, realising that his question was inappropriate, mentally smacked himself for letting that last bit of pride go, continued saying, “Sorry, it’ s your personal life...I shouldn’t have asked...I’m just gonna go”.
Before Buffy could say anything else, Jason was out of her office.
Chapter 2: Confusion
Italics denotes speech occuring in dreams
That night, after another long and tiring day, Buffy opened the door to be pleasantly greeted by the tantalising aroma of food wafting through the apartment. Her stomach immediately grumbled. Strange how she didn’t even think of hunger two seconds ago.
“I’m home”, she announced.
“In the kitchen”, Angel replied.
Walking through the living room to the short hallway, Buffy entered the kitchen to see Angel hovering over the stove.
“Hey honey”, Buffy greeted, leaning up to taste his talented lips.
“Hey”, Angel smiled at her before leaning down and giving her a peck.
“Smells amazing. What are you cooking?”
“Yum. How come you’re home early? No cases today?”
“Wasn’t busy. Thought I’d cook dinner. You hungry?”
“Why don’t you go wash up and I can have the table set in 15 minutes?”
Angel gazed at her retreating back, observing how her shoulders slumped in fatigue. For a few long moments, he allowed himself to bask in her beauty; mesmerized by the sway of her slim hips, how attractive her legs looked on those heels and that firm, pert behind that easily fits into his large, manly hands. He sighed and for what seems like the millionth time since they first met, felt like he was the luckiest man in the world to have the honour of calling such a beautiful creature his significant other. Reality came moments later though and he frowned, reminded of her nightmare. He wished she would just tell him.
After her shower, Buffy walked to the dining table to see it beautifully set. Angel was in the midst of pouring wine.
“Wow…Wine? What’s the occasion?”
“Pretty much you are. Have a seat my lady”, Angel said pulling out a chair for her.
“Thank you kind sir”, Buffy giggled, playing along.
Angel then took a seat on her right and they started eating.
“Oh my god. This tastes amazing. Where did you learn how to cook like this?”
“I saw it on TV once. Thought I’d give it a try. You like it?”
“Like it? I love it. I know you’re a great cook but this tastes sooo good!”
Angel beamed. He smiled, looking at Buffy eating and enjoying the dinner he had prepared. Honestly, he was very hopeful the wine would loosen her lips a little.
“So, how was work?” Angel innocently asked.
‘Let’s start with generic questions first’, he thought.
“Work was normal. Kids to counsel and stuff. The usual”.
“Any difficult kids today?”
“Not really. Pretty much the usual”.
A few moments later she added,
“Oh!... I did have an awkward moment with a colleague”.
“Well, remember I told you before that I have been hanging out with this guy, Jason?”
“Well, he sorta asked me out on a date”.
Angel raised his eyebrows, jealousy clearly shining through his eyes. Buffy silently giggled at him.
“What did you say?” Angel asked, trying to sound casual.
Buffy grinned. He was so cute when he’s jealous.
“I told him that I’m free Friday nights and on weekends from 6 till 11. That way I could do some patrolling after our date”, she said sarcastically.
“Oh”, Angel looked at her.
Buffy chuckled and shook her head at his irrational expression. Did he actually think she said that?
“Honey, I’m joking. Of course I told him no. Said that I’m happily involved”.
She swore she could hear Angel let out a sigh of relief.
“I can’t believe that you’d think I’d go out with him”.
“I didn’t think that.”
“How did he take it?”
“Well, he was embarrassed to say the least. Hope that he could rewind the whole thing and forget that it happened”.
“Poor Jason”, Angel said monotonously.
“You don’t mean that”.
“I do! I sympathize with him you know. He asked a girl out and got rejected. Well, I’m a little bothered that the girl in question is mine but still, it’s got to be hard getting rejected”.
Buffy simply shook her head and smiled at his response.
“I wonder if I gave him signs that I’m available”, Buffy suddenly wondered out loud.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, what if I led him on? Letting him think that it’s okay to ask me out”.
“Did you think you did?”
“Well, I usually have lunch with him and our talks seemed pretty platonic. We mostly talk about work and gossip on some of the teachers in school”.
“Maybe you seemed open to him and the way the conversation flowed freely between the two of you, he got the wrong impression. It happens”, he shrugged.
“He doesn’t know about me?”
“Throughout the whole time you had lunch with him, conversations of us never came up?”
“No. We don’t really talk about our personal lives. It is...personal”.
“I just think that maybe it’s sorta my fault. Maybe I led him on”, Buffy continued.
“It’s not. He liked your company. These things happen.”
“I guess. I think that things between us might be a little awkward from now on.”
“Overtime, it’ll get better.”
They resumed eating and continued talking about mundane stuff and amidst the conversation; her nightmare kept nagging at Angel in the back of his mind. Perhaps later before bed, she’d tell him.
The two beings; Oracles they called themselves received news that shook them. Visited by a messenger for the Powers that Be, they were informed of a vision that will affect the lives of the two strongest warriors.
“What are you implying?” the female questioned the messenger before them.
“It has been done. The Slayer shall remember the day that never was”.
“Is there a reason?” the male asked.
“I am merely a messenger. I know not what reason the Powers have”.
“You cannot do that! The agreement was made by our predecessors. It is done. The vampire holds up his end of the deal and we hold ours!” the male bawled.
“This deal was not supposed to be made in the first place! Your predecessors should not have entertained the request. It was not in their hands to change destiny”, the messenger argued.
“Do you expect him to be ignored?! The Powers knows his worth. He is a warrior who fights for our cause…the greater good”, the female one continued.
“The agreement was that he gave up his humanity in exchange for her life. She still died,” the messenger explained.
“That is irrelevant! She died saving her sister! It was said that she was supposed to meet her end in the End of Days. She didn’t because of the human life the vampire gave up!” the male one roared.
“It is willed. Destiny and fate is something that not even they can comprehend. It has been done”.
“This isn’t fair. She was not supposed to remember. The day did not happen”, the female oracle argued.
“Swallowing the day does not make it disappear. It is simply forgotten”.
“The agreement was done. You cannot do this. Please...allowing her to remember will cause her grief”, the male oracle said.
“It will happen sooner or later”.
“What do you mean?” the female oracle asked.
“Fate and destiny cannot be avoided. One way or another, what was willed to happen, will happen”.
“What is this about?” the male oracle asked.
“We will find out soon enough. Right now, it has begun. The slayer has been dreaming. It’s only a matter of time”.
“He will not be happy”, the male oracle continued.
“He definitely won’t be. He will be coming to you for answers.”
“We do not have any!” the female one said.
“Just tell him what you know…Until next time”, the messenger said before vanishing into thin air.
The oracles looked at each other, silently dreading the time they had to face the vampire in question.
They were in bed when Angel, pretending to read a book, studied Buffy. She had her lips sewn so tight that even the wine didn’t seem to work tonight. He was dying to know...needed to know but he knew Buffy didn’t like being pushed. He wanted to give her time, to allow her space so she would tell him on her own accord but the wait...god, the wait will slowly but surely kill him.
When she slid into bed, Angel put the book aside and wrapped his arms around her, leaning in, capturing her lips in a gentle, sweet kiss. Although, initially taken aback by his endearing deed, Buffy soon melded into his cool kiss. When they broke away, Buffy smiled and said,
“What was that for?”
Angel didn’t return her smile and his face grew serious, his eyes intently gazing into hers.
“You know you can tell me anything right?” he said.
Buffy simply returned his gaze. She knew where he was going. She smiled again and cupped his face.
“I’m okay”, she said, assuring him.
“I still wanna know. I need to.”
“There’s nothing to know”.
Angel could see her resolve. He sighed in defeat. He knew better than to push her. He kissed her one more time and released her. He tugged her hair behind her ear and continued,
“I’m here for you...always and forever”.
“I know”, she replied, her face still full of resolve.
“It’s late. You should get some sleep”, he said dejectedly, knowing that there was no point pushing. She wasn’t ready.
Turning, Angel reached for the night light and turned it off before lying down. Buffy did the same, laying sideways, her back to him. She didn’t want him to see her eyes glisten. She hated hurting him. She wished she could tell him but every fibre in her body didn’t want to. She was so lost in her thoughts that she almost jumped when Angel wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her back into his chest, wanting her near. Buffy let him. He kissed her shoulder and whispered, “I love you”.
Buffy laid still and caressed his arm as he hugged her tighter. She heard him mumble her name one more time before he fell asleep. It was long minutes later before Buffy too fell asleep.
'That’s a good sound’.
‘It feels pretty amazing’.
Buffy savoured the sound of Angel’s chest rumbling with a heartbeat, feel it heaving as he breathed.
‘Angel, this is the first time I’ve ever really felt this way’, she heard herself say.
‘Just like I’ve always wanted to...like a normal girl, falling asleep in the arms of her normal boyfriend...It’s perfect’.
She felt Angel kissed her forehead as she drifted off into slumber.
Buffy awoke to find herself in the dark. It was another dream. The clock showed that it was close to 3 in the morning. She turned to see Angel lying on his back still in deep sleep. She got out of bed, made her way to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water and sat at the dining table trying to recollect her thoughts.
In the dream, Angel was warm. He was breathing and had a heartbeat. He was alive. It felt as though she wasn’t dreaming it but was actually there; listening to the steady beating of his heart, the feel of his chest rising and falling and his warm breath as he placed the tender kiss on her forehead. It was so real.
People say dreams are manifestations of your deepest wishes and desires. When they first dated, she had lost count the countless times she wished that things were different between them. That he was human and that it wasn’t so complicated. But over the years, she has matured. And when they started dating again, she knew that it didn't matter to her anymore what he was. Not like it did back then. Vampire, man...she loved him either way. So why is she dreaming of him being human?
Experience has taught her to appreciate what she has and she whole heartedly does. She didn’t wish as much anymore and was happy the way things were. What they have now was great. They were together again, had a home and a life together. It was almost normal. But tonight’s dream made her ponder. In the dream, she remembered feeling happy and contented like she never felt before. She felt safe. Everything was right in her world.
“Hey”, Angel softly rumbled, breaking her reverie.
Buffy looked up to see Angel sleepily sauntered towards her, his hair slightly rumpled from sleep.
“Is everything okay?” he asked, gently squeezing her hand as he sat down beside her.
Buffy mustered a smile and replied,
“Yeah. I was just a little thirsty.”
Angel gazed at her and noticed that she was trying not to meet his eyes as she pulled her hand away from his. She was looping her hair behind her ears, looking at the glass of water on the table a little too intently and played with her fingers. Angel knew those gestures. She made them when she was nervous.
“You had another dream?” he asked.
Buffy stayed silent. Angel cupped her chin and made her look at him.
“Talk to me. Tell me what happened”, he continued.
She pulled her face away and stood up.
“It’s nothing. It’s just a dream. I’m okay.”
“You don’t look okay. Is it the same dream you had last night?”
“I don’t want to talk about it, please”, Buffy pleaded and turned away from him.
Angel made his way to her and gently held her shoulders.
“I’m sorry. I just...I know that the dreams are bothering you and I hate that I can’t make you feel better”, he softly said.
Buffy turned and held his hands.
“I’m really okay. I promise you.”
He wasn’t convinced and she knew it. She tiptoed and kissed him before letting him envelop her in his embrace. Contrary to her dreams, he felt cold. She couldn’t hear his heart beating and he didn’t breathe. It all felt so familiar yet so foreign at the same time. He led her back to bed and laid her down before he took his place beside her. She moved closer and laid her head on his chest as he wrapped his arm around her. Neither spoke. Neither knew what to say.
Soon, they fell back to sleep.
Chapter 3: Frustration
“Why so glum, chum?” Lorne greeted, breaking the vampire out of reverie.
Lorne had re-appeared around the same time Angel reopened his agency. Ecstatic to have his dear friend back, Lorne made it clear to Angel that his return does not mean he will join the fight. He has officially retired from those days and content to reopen his own bar again; this time simply named ‘The Host’. It didn’t matter to Angel. He was just glad to have him back.
Lorne walked into the Angel’s office dropping by for a visit only to find Angel deep in thought, his face full of worry.
“It’s nothing”, Angel simply said, not in a mood to share.
“And don’t try to read my mind”, Angel continued, warning the clairvoyant.
Years of honing taught Lorne control and allowed him to understand his gift. Lorne was different when he returned; he was stronger, wiser and seemed to have enhanced his telepathy. Singing was no longer required for he could look at a person and read their auras, their feelings and sometimes hear their thoughts. He doesn’t really speak how or what happened in the years since he left the Fang Gang and until this day, Angel was still unable to figure out the mystery.
“Too late Angelcakes”.
Angel glared at him, unamused.
“Talk to her. Whatever she’s not telling you, explain that you need to know whatever it is that’s bothering her”, Lorne advised.
“I did. But she just brushes me off and tell me she’s fine”.
“And you don’t buy it when she says that”.
“Of course not!”
Lorne simply stared at him, a little taken aback by his outburst.
“I know her Lorne. Better than I know myself. She’s scared and when she is, she either breaks down or pretends she’s okay”.
“Scared of what?”
“I don’t know...god!...it’s bugging me so much!”
“Well, if you’d like, I think I could help”.
Angel looked at him, catching on what he’s trying to say.
“But...” Lorne began to argue.
“No Lorne! She’s not like those demons at your bar you try to read!”
“I’m just trying to help”.
Bewildered by Angel’s reaction, Lorne kept quiet.
“Alright. Just let me know if you need anything”, Lorne softly said before leaving the tensed ensouled vampire alone.
Buffy looked up to see Jason at her door.
“Hey, come on in”.
“I just dropped by to let you know that Max isn’t in school today. His mum called and said he’s not feeling too well. I know he’s supposed to meet you today so I just want to let you know that you shouldn’t expect him”.
“Thanks. How is he in class? Is he more responsive? Does he talk to his classmates now?”
“Yeah. Amazingly he is. For someone who barely speaks two words to us in the beginning of the semester, he has turned out to be quite a responsive guy now. He’s asking questions in class and takes part in group discussions. He’s progressing nicely”.
“Really? That’s good to know”
“Don’t sound so surprised Buffy. You’re good at what you do.”
Silence fell between them. Buffy knew he didn’t come here all the way to just tell her that. Jason fidgeted for some minutes before saying,
“Buffy, about yesterday...”
“Jason, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it”.
Jason sighed. He seemed somewhat relieved and thankful that Buffy is trying to make it easier for him. He continued talking, trying to resume the normalcy between them.
“Well, the cafeteria is serving chocolate pie today. From what I heard from the kids, they say it’s quite good. I was thinking...”
Suddenly, Jason’s voice sounded distant and soft. And Buffy felt dizzy, his words slurred in her head. She remembered Jason talking about chocolate and pie. Or was it chocolate pie? Buffy tried to shake off the dizziness.
Then like a flash, she saw it. Angel, in bed with a woman. She frowned. A surge of jealousy went through her. ‘What the hell? Who the heck is that?’ she remembered thinking. Then in a flash, it was gone.
“Buffy, are you okay?” was the first thing she heard. It was obvious to her that she’s back to reality. Jason’s voice suddenly became clearer.
“Yeah, I’m fine. What were you saying?” she replied, glad that her voice sounded almost normal.
“I was just saying that maybe we could go and grab lunch together and try the chocolate...”
His voice was slurred again.
The flash came again. This time Angel was feeding the woman ice cream, a smile on his face. Buffy squinted, trying to make out who the mystery woman was. Then she saw. Blinking a few times to make sure her eyes weren’t deceiving her, she frowned trying to make sense of what she’s seeing because the woman in bed was her!
Suddenly, she felt the cool, velvety chocolate melting in her mouth, making its way down her throat. She could taste the rich chocolatey goodness. She looked around as if trying to make some sense of what was going on but it seems like everything else around her just melted away and all that she could see was the scene that was playing right before her eyes.
‘This is a dream. You’re human for like a minute and already there’s cookie dough fudge mint chip in the fridge’.
‘God, I love food.’
‘Food is good.’
She felt sore all over, her lips swollen, her nipples hardened and her core was a little wet. Her thighs were tired. Although Angel’s bottom half was out of her line of sight, it was obvious that her lover was naked. They just had sex and from the numbness of her muscles, loads of it. She was sore but contented. She saw herself feeding Angel chocolate before leaning forward. Angel met her halfway and gave her a gentle, loving kiss.
‘Why didn’t you tell me about chocolate and peanut butter?’ she heard Angel asked.
‘Chocolate?’ Buffy briefly thought.
Then another flash and the scene was gone.
“Buffy, Buffy”, Jason’s voice registering to her.
When she didn’t respond, he waved a hand before her eyes. It seemed to work.
“What?” she manage to say.
“Are you okay? You don’t look too good”.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just...I’m a little dizzy that’s all.”
“Are you sick?”
“No. I haven’t been sleeping well. Do you think we could do lunch some other time? I just feel like resting my eyes for a little bit.”
“Okay. But if you’re really not well, you should go on home”.
When Jason left, Buffy immediately locked her door, needing time to compose herself. She sat back in her chair and closed her eyes. What she saw, it felt like a dream but what was happening? Now she doesn’t even need to be asleep to dream? It was confusing.
Angel kept punching the demon.
“Who do you work for!” Angel demanded.
The demon stayed silent but snickered.
Angel lifted the demon and threw it against the sewer wall and started pummelling him again, showing no mercy. Lorne grimaced, feeling a little sorry for the demon, silently hoping it would just tell the permanently ensouled vampire what he needs to know.
“One more time, who do you work for?”
What started out as a recon for Angel turned out to be a very eventful patrol with lots of intense pummelling when he caught wind that there was a bounty on his beloved slayer. Lorne had overheard that someone had engaged demons to kill the slayer and immediately informed the vampire who began roaming the hot spots in hopes for clues. This demon was the third one he got his hands on. He didn’t care. Even if it took him all night and he needed to hurt or kill a hundred more demons, he would find out who sent them.
“Start talking if you want to live”, Angel said.
“She carries. The slayer bears and she will die before it comes. Kill me if you want. There will be others coming. We won’t stop”, the demon laughed.
The demons’ words further ignited the rage within the ensouled vampire and he slammed the demon against a rusted metal pole that was protruding from wall. The pole pierced through the demon and it shrieked. Angel leaned forward and harshly whispered,
“And I won’t stop until each and every one of you is dead.”
“You can’t protect her forever. We are a sect of loyal demons whose sole purpose is to kill her. We have no needs, no desires except the bounty. There are others just like you. A human face with a human body but inside, a murderous fiend who shares the same thought, the same need”, the demon taunted.
Angel’s face contorted in anger and before it could react, he snapped the demon’s neck. Lorne’s eyes widened at the sound of the crack.
“Open your ears, Lorne. If you hear anything, let me know”.
And before Lorne could answer, Angel was gone. Lorne was speechless. This was a sight of Angel he’d never seen before. He had seen him angry, upset and the spectrum of emotions the vampire was capable of but this…his fury so intense it felt demonic…almost as if there was a glimpse of Angelus. Lorne brushed off the thought because it was impossible since his soul was bound slightly over a year ago. He made his way home, determined to do everything in his power to help the enraged vampire.
Buffy pulled off her jacket and hung it on the coat rack before switching on the lights. Angel wasn’t home. She picked up the phone and dialled the number she knows by heart and let it ring for 15 seconds before hanging up. ‘Probably caught in a case’, she thought.
She made her way to the bedroom, intending to prepare a hot soothing bath while waiting for Angel. She took out her favourite bath salts and poured it into the tub before turning on the tap. She then went in search for her favourite CD and loaded it into the player before stripping and immersing herself in the warm tub. She instantly felt relaxed and calmed. She closed her eyes, concentrating on how the tepid water felt against her skin, the vanilla scent wafting through her senses as she leaned back and enjoyed the music, feeling her sore muscles unwind.
‘So we’ll talk soon’, she said and innocently placed her hand on his.
But the touch ignited a jolt within him, his eyes looking at her with desire and longing. She held his gaze knowing what it meant. He held her hand, his fingers brushing the back of her hand as he gently tugged her closer.
‘Mature plan Angel. Remember the mature plan’, Angel silently said to himself.
His eyes swept across her body, remembering the beautiful soft supple skin he caressed a long while ago. Lust overwhelmed him and he wanted so much to feel her skin again. He wanted to feel her writhing beneath him again with her legs resting on his hips as he plunged into her depth. He swore that he truly, whole heartedly wanted to go with the mature plan. It would be insane to just pick up where they left off but god, her scent…even without the enhanced vampiric sense of smell, her tantalizing smell was intoxicating. He should fight this and do the right thing but he really couldn’t wait. When she allowed him to pull her closer, and their eyes meet again and seeing the reciprocal hunger in her eyes, Angel’s resolve crumbled. His last thoughts were, ‘Screw the plan’, and they took.
He pushed her hand aside and wrapped his arm around her waist, dragging her until she was against his frame. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down, mauling his lips. Angel tugged her shirt and pulling her up to level her with him so he could kiss her better…so he could tangle her luscious tongue with his. Buffy clung to his shoulders as he moved towards the fridge and slamming them against it, never breaking the tongue tangling kiss, trapping her between him and the fridge. Angel pressed his body against her, making sure that there wasn’t an ounce of space between them and still, it wasn’t enough for him. He wanted her so very much closer. With one masculine hand, he cupped her rear and lifted her. Their lips broke apart momentarily in the process and his lips immediately trailed to her earlobe and he wasted no time nibbling it as he lifted her higher into his arms. She moaned, immediately wrapping her legs around him as he pressed himself against her core, wanting her to know how hungry he was for her. She tightened her hold on him and turned her face towards his, searching for his lips that was currently savouring the soft flesh of her ear. He relented and plunged his tongue deep into the cavern of her mouth, welcoming and savouring her appendage, loving how good she tastes. Buffy moaned relishing the lips she was familiar with and had missed so much. It was different now; those lips were so warm but the intensity, the passion, the sensuality…she remembers.
Tightening his hold on her, Angel moved from the fridge and made his way to the kitchen table. Without grace or patience, he started throwing everything off the table and she helped him. Fruits, cups, teapot, everything had to go as he placed the object of his affection on the table. Glass shattered and crackers crumbled. He didn’t care what broke or the fact that the cups and teapot were a new purchase. All he wanted was the blonde goddess in his arms, his length plunging deep within her. He pushed her down on the table and covered her body with his. Buffy spread her legs open to accommodate his hips as he lifted himself off the floor, pressing his hardening length against her core. His hands tangled in her hair as she flexed her hands on his back. His lips travelled down her neck as he breathed in her unique scent; taking time to appreciate the fact that he could breathe now.
She started unbuttoning his shirt and Angel lifted himself off her just enough for her to work all of it off. He stared down at her and his hands began tugging her top, getting impatient to see her golden skin. When Buffy finished unbuttoning his shirt, he wasted no time pulling the sheer fabric off her, leaving her in a flimsy white camisole. Even without his vampiric eyesight, he could clearly see the beautiful bosoms and her coral nipples beneath the thin material; beckoning for his attention. She started to push his shirt off his shoulders and he shrugged it off, throwing it to join her top on the floor. He immediately pressed himself down to her again, their lips mating with each other. He couldn’t wait anymore. He wanted to be inside her. His hands started grazing her waistband, searching for the button. When he found it, he skilfully flicked it open with one hand and immediately placed his hand in her pants, pressing against her moist core.
Buffy gasped and stared at him, clearly surprised by his wanton behaviour but not wanting him to stop. She arched her hips slightly towards his hand and Angel groaned at the moisture that was seeping through; the lacy cloth between did nothing to shield his fingers from feeling the juices flowing from her. He stroked her and she began panting, clinging on his arm and closed her eyes, drowned in the pleasure he so easily brought her. He stroked harder and faster as she moaned and arched. He reluctantly pushed himself off her and stood on the floor, tugging her pants down hurriedly but it became stuck on those boots she had on. He began pulling and tugging those damn boots desperately, wanting it off so he could return his attention back to bringing her pleasure. Buffy was already whining at the loss of his body, wanting him close to her. Seeing his struggle, she joined in the battle and through team work, they were successful, leaving her with a white thong and camisole. Angel tugged her to sit up and wrapped his arms around her lithe body before resuming the sensuous stroking of her warm core. Buffy followed his lead not knowing what he wanted to do with her but she didn’t care; as long as his hand didn’t stop what it was doing, she didn’t care.
Angel stared at her, mesmerized by her beautiful features, loving her moans and grunts as his hand assaulted her covered core. He would give anything to be inside her but no. Seeing how responsive she was to this foreplay, he wanted to work her up relishing in her groans and the way she arched into his hand, wanting to do everything in his power to make sure she enjoyed this. He leaned and pressed his forehead against her as she opened her eyes to stare into his; the look they had for the other was pure lust. Angel began to kiss her, sucking, biting and pulling on her lower lip. Buffy tried to respond, trying to match the ferocity of his kisses but she couldn’t; too busy concentrating on the skilful digits working her very wet core, wanting to drown in this pleasure.
Just when she thought she was toppling over the edge, he stopped. Panting, she gazed at him, questioning him with her eyes but Angel didn’t say anything. His hand then pulled the wet garment covering her centre and with one strong tug, he ripped it off. She gasped, his action suddenly heightening her hunger. He threw the cloth aside, not caring where it went and wasted no time stroking her again. Buffy jerked and moaned louder, surprised by the intense sensitivity of her throbbing core. How was it possible that she was even more turned on? Without any barrier, he relished the soft lips he was stroking and grew harder. Buffy felt her juices multiply uncontrollably, flowing out, making his fingers slip back and forth that much easier. Her breath became more erratic and Angel felt his strength suffocating, fighting to escape from the tight confines of his pants.
Not wanting to wait anymore, with his other free hand, he began tugging his button, struggling to open it. Sensing his difficulty, Buffy helped him and when they pulled the zipper down, she saw him. His velvet length protruding before her; hard, proud and dripping just for her as she stared in awe. Although she has seen him before on that one night of passion, she still was mesmerized by the length, his girth and how unbelievable it was that he could fill her. Boldly, she touched him. He was warm, hot even. Not cold like the night she remembered. He gritted at her touch and began kissing her. Sucking and nibbling her top and lower lip. He couldn’t wait any longer and pushed her hand away, shucking his pants off and positioned himself, touching her nether lips with his blunt head. He pushed in a little, feeling her core parting before retracting. At that mere contact, Buffy gasped, breaking their kiss.
She stared at him as he pushed in again, this time a little deeper than before. He repeated the pattern before settling into rhythm, each time plunging into her deeper and deeper. He closed his eyes relishing in her warmth. His senses heightened; being alive suddenly had a whole new meaning during lovemaking with Buffy. Before, she managed to drive him over the edge with her warmth as his cold length plunged into her over and over again and although he was technically dead, he felt his dead manhood come alive inside her. Now, his member being warm, he could feel every twinge, every muscle in his strength stiffing as it ached to be deeper inside her. He could feel her walls better, the length caressing the tight, hot core as he pushed in and out. Her juices coating his now warm length somehow heightened the pleasure he thought he was familiar with. He embraced her, his hands flexing on her shoulders as he continued thrusting. Buffy clung to his shoulders and Angel kissed her briefly before licking her pink lips. She too felt the difference; his warm strength somehow made her more responsive, more turned on. She nuzzled her nose with his and huskily whispered, “Faster”.
Angel felt himself grew harder as he moved his hands to her waist and lifted her a little of the table, tilting her hips; Buffy’s heart raced as she braced herself for what was to come. Angel gave her one carnal look and slammed himself fully into her. Buffy groaned and clung to his shoulders for support as he retracted fully and slammed into her again. The act suddenly awakened feelings of pleasure that Buffy was certain would lead to sheer ecstasy. He slammed into her harder and as she requested, he increased his cadence.
She suddenly found herself off the table as Angel easily lifted her up and down his increasingly hard length. He continued slamming into her faster and faster until the smacking sound of their joined parts was all that she could hear. When he started to retract, he felt Buffy squeezing her walls, gripping his cock. He gasped and stared at her. Now, she had a carnal look and continued squeezing him knowing how crazy it made him. Angel lost all control and lifted her fully onto him, walking the short distance and immediately slamming her against the wall. She shrieked as he drove deeper, placing himself to her hilt. Buffy felt her legs becoming weak as she hanged onto him for dear life. Angel however didn’t stop and just plunged into her over and over again.
They began kissing and Buffy tugged his hair as she bit and mauled his lips with Angel replied her kisses with matching vigour. Suddenly needing to breathe, Buffy broke away from his kiss and hugged him, moaning and grunting. She was so very close and he could feel it as he drove faster, harder and deeper into her. Buffy screamed at his assault but god help her, she didn’t want him to stop. Sure enough, she came in the next instant, calling his name in ecstasy. He slowed down his thrusts as she shuddered in his arms, kissing her shoulder and neck, waiting for her to recover. When she did, she kissed him tenderly, licking his lips and tangling his tongue with hers. Breaking the kiss he nuzzled her face and had no intention of pulling out of her just yet. His strength still so hard inside her.
Chapter 4: Surreal
“God, the things you do to me. The way you make me feel...” she said softly, kissing his cheek.
Angel smiled, triumphant.
“Lie on the table”, she instructed.
Angel began to pull out of her but she tightened the hold around his waist, clearly not wanting him away from her. Angel gazed questioningly at her.
“Just go to the table and lie down”, she answered his gaze.
He simply nodded.
Once there, he carefully sat on the table, both grunting when he unintentionally pushed himself in her when his hips jerk a little from trying to sit up on the table. Buffy gently pushed him down as she positioned herself on a kneeling position, both knees at the side of his hips. He rested his hands on her hips, not knowing what she was trying to do but rapidly becoming excited over it. Buffy then slowly lifted herself from his member, pausing when reaching the tip and squeezed her walls gripping him before slamming down on him. Buffy repeated the pattern a few more times, taking her time, dawdling, teasing him. Was she trying to torture him? He groaned, willing her to go faster, wanting her to ride him for all he was worth but Buffy however was having none of it, intent on driving him crazy.
Then, unexpectedly, she pulled herself off him. Angel whimpered at the loss. She glided off the table and stood before him like he did with her earlier. He braced himself on his elbows, wondering what she was trying to do. She caressed his thighs before boldly touching his hard member, kissing the tip. At the touch of her lips on him, Angel lost all train of thought. She began taking him in her mouth, sucking him gently, bobbing her head up and down. ‘Where did she learn how to do that?’ he briefly thought and then, unsure if he wanted to know the answer. She suddenly stopped and he felt like begging her. Wanting to tell her to stop torturing him like this and just continuing sucking him or let him deep into her core.
Angel was about to tell her when she pulled herself up on the table, crawling over him, assuming her kneeling position again. Angel sat up, holding her to him, his fingers lingering at the hem of her camisole. She stared into his chocolate pool and embraced him, covering her hands over his and together, they pulled the thin cloth over her head. She was bared to him. His eyes grazed over the beautiful round mounds and the hardened nipples. She quivered under his intense gaze. He pulled his eyes away from her breast and to her eyes, leaning in and they kissed lovingly, languidly; tongue tangling, lips sucking.
Angel roved his hands over her bare body, relishing in the soft, supple skin that was smooth as silk, just as he remembered. She hitched a breath when he covered his large hands over her breasts, brushing his thumb over the nubs grazing them over and over, hardening the tip even more. He then broke the kiss and kissed down her neck, suckling his mark before lifting his head moments later and looked at her beautiful face once more before diving down to suckle the coral tips. She screamed in pleasure as he laved and suckled them taking his time, alternating his attention between the two ultra sensitive nubs. When he began biting them, she arched against his mouth and by the time he was done, she was breathless. He gave her some time to before his lips found hers again and she hungrily suckled his tongue. How is it he made her so hungry with desire?
She couldn’t wait. Lifting herself a little, she immediately sank onto his strength. He broke the kiss, obviously surprised by her actions. She slowly settled herself down onto him until her core was sitting on his pelvis, his engorged length completely inside her. Both stayed still for long moments. Angel concentrating on the pleasure of being enveloped in her warmth, his strength growing harder by the millisecond as Buffy tried to accommodate his girth. He was so big and strong. Slowly, she grinded, rotating her hips, feeling him hit every inch of her core. He hugged her, his hands flexing on her back, wanting her close to him, wanting to feel her naked chest against his. She fastened her pace, her breath suddenly erratic as he started kissing her and she moaned against his lips. When she felt out of breath, she broke the kiss and filled her lungs. She rode harder, the table now rocking due to their erotic movements. Still she rode him harder, taking his length deep inside her. Angel rolled his eyes in pleasure, knowing he was so close to the edge. Suddenly, the table gave way, unable to withstand the rising passion between the two lovers. When the table broke, he fell back, unintentionally ramming into her and she found herself falling over him, involuntarily clenching her walls against his girth, they screamed due to the impact.
“Oh my god”, he whispered.
She sat up over him and rode him faster and harder. He was literally out of breath; something he hadn’t felt in a long time. He wanted to kiss her, hug her, touch her but at that moment, he couldn’t. She was riding him so hard and fast that he was drowning…drowning in ecstasy…in the pool of desire that was Buffy. All he could do was lie back and relished the bliss that would soon make him burst. As if what she was doing wasn’t driving him crazy enough, she began lifting herself up and down his shaft. This was it. Angel was losing control.
“God, Buffy!”, he panted.
Buffy rode him a few more times before leaning over him, bracing her palms on the side of his head, lifting herself up and down. He stared into her beautiful face, loving that it was contorted in erotic pleasure, making her look even more beautiful. Buffy in turn, watched as his expressions changed, knowing he was brimming soon. He was so very close. At that, Buffy clenched her walls against him, knowing how crazy it made him. Suddenly he knocked her arms off and she came crashing down on him, kissing her hungrily. She continued clenching him as she tried to move up and down while Angel then began thrusting up, aiding her and when she clenched tightly one more time, holding him snugly within her, his body became taut. He broke off their kiss and came, screaming her name as he shuddered, his hips jerking further into her as his seed filled her core. He held onto her as he tried calming himself down, trying to catch his breath.
When he calmed, he welcomed her lips as Buffy kissed him leisurely, lovingly. When they broke away, Buffy pulled herself from his now limp member settled herself on top of him, lying on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her and sighed.
“Wow”, Buffy finally said.
“Yeah”, Angel said dreamily.
Buffy looked around and saw the mess they made.
“Sorry about the mess”, she sheepishly said.
“Don’t worry about it”, he replied, gently pecking her lips.
Suddenly, it occurred to her that they were on the floor.
“What happened to the table?” she asked.
She looked around and saw that they were actually on the table or what was left of it. The other parts were scattered around them.
“I think we broke it”, he replied.
“I think it happened when you...rode me”, he huskily said.
“You don’t remember?”
“I mean of course but it can’t be that bad that the table had to break. I mean, was I that rough?”
Angel snickered. Buffy smacked his chest.
“Are you mocking me?” she questioned.
“Of course not. And to answer your question, you were...aggressive”, he licked her lips.
“I was?” she pouted.
“Hey, I’m not complaining”, he pecked her lips.
“In fact, it kinda turns me on”, he continued huskily as he moved lower to fully kiss her lips.
Their tongues duelled before he began to move over her. She felt him hard again. She broke off the kiss.
“Are you serious?” she asked.
He simply kissed her again, thrusting his tongue into her mouth.
“Aren’t you tired?” she asked again.
“Nope. Are you?”
“Not at all”.
He stood up and held out a hand to her. She stood and they began kissing. He cupped her rear and lifted her and she automatically wrapped her legs around his hips, not breaking their kiss. She held onto him tightly as he walked towards the bed.
She woke up to find herself immersed in the bathtub.
‘What the hell?’ she thought, somewhat disoriented.
She sat up and ran her hand through her hair. The dream was so vivid. She could feel his every stroke, every thrust. It was like she was there experiencing it first hand, feeling every kiss, every touch, every bit of pleasure humming through her body. Just thinking about it was making her excited. What was happening to her?
After some moments, she pushed herself to brush off the thought and rinsed. After changing into her usual sleep attire consisting of camisole and pyjama pants, she realised Angel wasn’t home. Glancing at the clock, it showed it was close to eleven. She checked her phone to see if Angel called or left her messages while she was taking a bath but no such luck.
‘That’s strange’, she thought.
Usually, when Angel will be home late or if he’s not coming back at all, no matter how caught up he was in a case or something supernatural, he would always give her a call even if it was to say, “Honey, I’m not coming home tonight. Don’t wait up”.
She dialled his number but it went straight to voicemail. She called The Host and four rings later, a familiar voice picked up.
“Lorne, it’s Buffy”.
“Hey sweetcheeks. How have you been?”
“I’m trying to reach Angel. His cell phone keeps going to voice mail. Do you know where he is?”
“Last time I checked he’s out patrolling,” Lorne lied. Well, technically he isn’t lying. Angel was on patrol only now he was on a ‘bounty hunter killing’ mission to protect his beloved Buffy.
“Patrol? Did he say where?”
“He isn’t back yet. I’m kinda worried”.
“He’s a big boy, sweetie who’s over 250 years old. He can take care of himself”.
“I guess”, she sighed.
“You should try and get some sleep. You’ll wake up to see him next to you.”
Buffy pondered for a few moments before deciding.
“I’m gonna go look for him. Lorne, if you hear from him, could you let me know?”
“Buffy, I think you should just stay in”, Lorne panicked.
Sensing the tension in his voice, she asked,
“Is there something you’re not telling me, Lorne?”
“No! I mean, you’ve had a long day. I’ll get some of the boys here to be your eyes and ears. We’ll find him”, he managed to recover.
“Don’t worry Buffy. I’ll find him. I promise you.”
“Okay. Just please call me the second you know where he is.”
After she hung up, she tried his cell again but it went straight to voicemail.
“Where are you Angel?” she muttered.
Covered in blood and grime, Angel had killed the 6th demon that night. It’d be morning in a few hours and knew it was time to call it a night. Buffy was probably worried sick especially since he didn’t call her. Feeling as if it was safe for now, he finally convinced himself to go home. When he was about to drive, he realised that his phone was shut off. He turned it on before driving off. Midway, his phone rang and he immediately picked up thinking it was Buffy.
“Hey, I’m on my way home. Got caught up in a case and...”
“Don’t worry about it sweetums”, the caller replied. The voice wasn’t Buffy.
“Yeah. Where were you the whole night?”
“I told you. I was hunting.”
“Well, the least you could do was call your girlfriend and check in. The poor girl was worried sick! And I obviously couldn’t tell her that there’s a bounty on her head and that her vampire boyfriend is killing every demon he got his hands on!”
“But is she okay? Is she home?”
“Yeah. Had a Draco demon drop by your place to check up on her. She’s fine but worried. She was really contemplating looking for you just now. I had to lie to her and said you were patrolling”.
“Well, that’s not really a lie”.
“It’s not really the truth either. Where are you now?”
“I’m on my way home”.
“Good. I went over around midnight. It took a lot of talking but I manage to convince her to sleep. Although, I think she would have fallen asleep anyhow. She looks exhausted and a little under the weather, if I may add.”
“Thank you, Lorne”.
“It’s her dreams. She hasn’t been sleeping well. And now knowing there’s a bounty on her, I don’t think I’ll sleep well either”.
“She still won’t tell you?”
“My offer still stands”.
“I’m just saying. If you change your mind, my offer still stands”.
“Go on home to her”.
“Sweet dreams Angelcakes”.
He hung up and sped home, wanting to rest his tired body.
Ten minutes later, he turned into his apartment building. He parked the car and swiftly made the short walk to their home. It was dark and he quietly made his way to the bedroom. He saw Buffy in bed, sleeping soundly; relieved that she was safely tucked in their big bed. He popped a bag of blood in the microwave before making his way to the bathroom for a quick shower.
Cleansed from the grime and demon blood, he drank the warm blood and grabbed the Book of Liestat to read up on the sect of demons that was hired to kill Buffy. He read for about a half hour before his body longed for the bed. He quickly gulped down the remaining blood and made his way to bed. Making sure to be quiet, he swiftly peeled off the covers and slid beside Buffy. He leaned over to stare at her before kissing her forehead. He laid next to her, his arm draping over her in its signature position. She instantly curled into him, her hands grasping his arm. He smiled and breathed in her familiar vanilla scent before he surrendered himself to slumber.
She was lying in his arms and she was safe.
Chapter 5: Perfect Happiness
SMUT!!...The world needs more Bangel Sex!..
While walking towards the bed, they continued kissing, their tongues playing the familiar game of thrust and parry. When they reached the bed, he broke the kiss and deposited her on the edge of the bed. She scooted back to make space for him. He crawled towards her, his eyes filled with carnal desire. He settled himself on a kneeling position before reaching out and grasped her feet, easily pulling her until her leg was around his waist. She gasped and stared into his eyes. He gripped her hips and immediately plunged into her, filling her with his hard strength. Without giving her time to adjust, he started thrusting. Buffy’s breath hitched. His deed, although unexpected was beginning to turn her on as she felt herself grew wetter. He panted, thrusting into her with brute force. Her head fell onto the mattress, pulling his sheet just so she has something to hold on to as he rammed into her. She panted, trying to catch her breath. When he began to increase his cadence, she arched.
Suddenly, she advanced on him, pushing herself up and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. She began pushing her core into his hips, taking him deeper into her. He did the same, kissing her at the same time. Angel suddenly stopped. Buffy halted her actions and her eyes fluttered open, wondering.
Before she could say anything, Angel mauled her lips and jerked his hips up to stab into her and stopped. Breaking the kiss, he repeated the deed. He stabbed into her and stopped. He didn’t incessantly thrust. When she tried to ride him, he tightly wrapped his arms around her small body, holding her captive as if not allowing her to move. He looked at her eyes as if telling her to let him take control and let him set the pace. He tightened his hold on her waist and jerked his hips again, stabbing into her and stopped. He stabbed again and stopped. His hand moved over her arms, breasts and abs before settling on the rear. He expertly cupped her rear and began lifting her core from his strength. She surrendered to his deed, not knowing what he was trying to achieve but knew that she would be greatly rewarded soon.
He slowly lifted her and when he was almost out of her core, he unexpectedly rammed into her, plunging all his length to her hilt. She gasped. His actions grazed the nub within her and she was surprised at this new heightened pleasure. He repeated it over and over. With no particular effort on her part, Buffy simply held him and enjoyed the pleasure he was building up. Angel easily lifted her and brought her down his ever hard strength, stopping momentarily after every thrust to relish in her heat; feeling her walls clamping on him and her juices coating his strong girth. Angel could feel himself brimming but he wasn’t done yet. He wanted to feel her writhe beneath him. In a swift move, he pushed her down to the bed and immediately began thrusting deep into her, this time settling into a continuous erotic rhythm. Buffy rolled her eyes as she began feeling the pleasure heightened within her with every deep thrust. Her hands gripped his arm, the bedsheet and pillow as she squirmed. When he fastened his intimate intrusion on her, she moaned out loud as he incessantly piston in and out of her. Angel looked down and saw her chest heaving as she turned her head and bit the pillow, drowning herself in pleasure.
Angel ducked and immediately plunged his tongue into her luscious mouth, kissing, nipping and sucking her lips. She moaned and grunted against his lips. When he broke the kiss and began kissing her neck, she buried her face in his shoulder and dug her nails into his back. She was so close. Angel rose from his position, shifting from his elbows to his palm. Buffy whimpered and began pulling his arm, wanting him to crush his weight on her, to feel his hard chest grazing hers but Angel was having none of it. He immediately threaded both her hands with his, distracting them from touching him and placed them on the side of her head; all along not breaking his thrusting rhythm in her. With this new position, it allowed him to fuck her harder, rougher, deeper. Buffy let out a shrill as he roughly pounded into her. Her rear was being lifted off the bed every now and then due to his violent pounding. He pounded her faster and faster, his strength about to burst. She lifted her head and bit his neck, her blunt teeth scraping and nipping his skin. Angel groaned and thrust into her even faster and rougher.
“Oh my god. Don’t stop please...don’t stop”, Buffy huskily said as she laid back into the pillow.
Encouraged by her words, he struck even harder and moments later, both their bodies went taut and they screamed, both reaching their peaks simultaneously. She could feel his seed bursting into her, loving the feel of his juices coating her walls. He fell over her and shuddered, his hips jerking, trying to recover from the earth shattering climax. She too quivered; her vaginal walls spasming against his hard length as she tried to return to reality.
When they eventually recover, he pulled himself out of her, released her hands and began kissing her, languidly, lovingly. She immediately wrapped her arms around his back, stroking it and threading her fingers in his hair. When he broke the kiss, he rested his forehead against hers, stared into her eyes and smiled. Buffy returned his smile before tugging his head down, continuing the tongue tangling kiss as her hands roamed across his back before resting them on his rear, gently squeezing them.
“You’re amazing”, Angel said long moments later, his head resting on her chest.
Buffy smiled with pride.
“You’re not so bad yourself”, she replied kissing his temple.
He lifted his head and pushed himself up so that they were face to face.
“I love you”, he whispered, pouring the all his emotions which he kept locked away since he left her that night.
Buffy’s eyes glisten as her heart soared hearing the words from him she didn’t think she would ever hear again.
“I love you”, reciprocating with similar emotions as she leaned up to gently peck his lips.
“I feel like ravishing you over and over again but I need food”, he said.
“I wore you out huh?”
“Certainly did. I need to replenish”.
Getting out of bed, he began walking towards the kitchen. Buffy raked her eyes over his deliciously sexy naked body. ‘God, he’s beautiful’, she briefly thought. When he was out of sight she leaned back into bed and sighed. Without Angel, Buffy suddenly felt a little cold even as she pulled the thick covers over her body.
“Honey, could you throw me my top?” she called out.
“Why? I prefer you topless”, he teased as he searched around the kitchen for her white top.
Buffy rolled her eyes at his answer and smiled.
“It’s not here. I don’t see it”, he answered 5 seconds later.
“It must be around somewhere”.
“It’s not in here”, he replied before spotting his shirt.
He threw her the shirt.
“Just wear mine”, he offered.
She took the shirt and slipped it on immediately feeling comfortable, enveloped in his big shirt, taking in the scent that is uniquely Angel.
“Would you like anything?” Angel asked, immediately popping bite sized chocolates into his mouth as he rummaged through the fridge.
“Do you have chocolate?”
“Yupe”, he answered and took the box of chocolates along with a box of strawberries.
“And peanut butter. Preferably crunchy”, she called out.
He took out a few more items and a tub of ice cream before heading back to bed.
Buffy stirred slightly in her sleep as her mind sees the mirage blurring and the scene changing before her.
“It’s just right”, Buffy said before she bent down to lick the ice cream of his chest. She then began kissing his chest before laving his nipple. Angel began chuckling, his laughter music to her ears. It isn’t very often that she heard Angel laugh but when he did, she couldn’t help but feel warm and fuzzy inside knowing that she made him laugh. Angel wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her neck, his breath tickling her before pulling her over him. He nuzzled her jaw before she turned and caught his lips against hers, kissing him gently. She straddled him, feeling his strength come alive. She broke the kiss and stared into his eyes lovingly as he smiled at her. He began kissing her right cheek, slowly moving down to her neck.
“I love it when you laugh”, she whispered.
“You do?” he chuckled against her skin.
“Yeah. You have a very husky, sexy laugh”, she teased moaning as he moved his hands over her rear, cupping it.
He looked up and smiled.
“Thanks”, he said before leaning in, kissing her lips gently and continued his trail on her neck.
When he found his mark, he spent his time licking, laving, suckling the scar. Buffy moaned and held his head in place, threading her fingers through his hair. He lifted his head and kissed her again, this time thoroughly, passionately, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. She gladly welcomed it, sucking the appendage. She was rapidly becoming aroused by his ministrations and began whimpering against his lips. She could feel his strength getting harder, erected against her core. She couldn’t wait for it to be inside her. Neither could Angel but he forced himself to wait, wanting to build her up again. He loved how responsive she was to his foreplay and learned that the more he teased her, the more aroused she got and when he finally gave in and mate with her, he was heavily rewarded with her unbridled passion, her incessant thirst for his hard strength which in return made him hungry for her, her warm heat, her kisses.
He has never in his life of over 240 years felt this way about anyone. He lusts for her. He knows for certain that his desire for her will only grow overtime. It frightened but excited him at the same time, knowing that his love and passion for her will never cease, that she was all that he needed for the rest of his new natural life. When he broke the kiss, Buffy panted, hungry for him.
“Angel, I want you inside”, she whispered.
He would give anything to be buried deep in her heat but he had his own agenda, knowing for certain that it was something they had never tried, something he knew she would enjoy.
“Patience baby”, he coaxed.
Her eyes widened a little, hearing the endearment for her. No doubt Angel has had endearments for her throughout the time that they were together but he did it so rarely that she treasured it every time he did and it had been so long since she heard him call her.
“I miss hearing you call me that”, she whispered, her voice quivering, overwhelmed with emotions.
“I miss calling you that”.
She kissed him again, this time rubbing her core against him a little. He broke the kiss, whimpering against her ears.
“Please, I need you”, she said.
He didn’t reply. Instead, he started unbuttoning his shirt she donned and slid it off her shoulders. He threw the shirt on the floor and began kissing her shoulder and hugged her to him holding her close before turning her over, switching their positions. Buffy went willingly as she felt him press her down onto the bed. Once they were comfortable, he kissed her gently, lovingly. He broke the kiss and stared down at her. Her chest heaved as she arched her hips upwards, clearly wanting him to take her, claim her. He’ll need to distract her.
“You’re so beautiful”, he said, his hand grazing the curves of her body.
“I love how your skin feels against mine. The first time when we made love, despite being cold and dead, I was warmed and loved by you. Now, everytime I’m deep inside you, god Buffy, if only you knew how amazing you feel”, his lips began kissing her chest taking time before moving down to her breasts. He suckled the coral nipples, licking, laving, alternating the nubs. Buffy began to whimper and arched her chest into his warm mouth.
Buffy couldn’t believe that she was becoming more aroused by his words. He began kissing his way down her body. When he began to move past her hips, she tensed.
“Shhhh...”Angel placed a finger on her lips before she could finish her sentence. He brought his face up to hers.
“I want to taste you. Every single delicious inch of you”, he whispered, his hand grazing her core.
Before Buffy could reply, he moved down to her core, his skilled fingers gently stroking her. Her breath hitched as her hips as if it has a mind of its own arched uncontrollably towards his hand. His strokes became faster and Buffy felt like she couldn’t breathe, the pleasure he brought her was amazing. Angel kept on stroking as he gazed intimately at his lover’s hub, loving how wet it was getting. He then proceeded to boldly lick the luscious lips. At that moment, Buffy began to sit up, bracing her weight on her elbows.
“Angel, what are you doing?” her voice came out panting.
Angel didn’t answer but instead, firmly held onto her hips and darted out his tongue to lick the lips again. He continued lapping her, licking her from the bottom up, making sure he didn’t leave any part untouched. Buffy wanted to protest to this very intimate act but his tongue was doing things to her that she couldn’t believe. She was so aroused, she was loving it. She gripped the sheets tightly as he continued his ministrations. When she thought, it could not get any better, she felt him parting her nether lips with his finger and before she knew it, he began flicking her sensitive nub with his tongue.
“Oh god!” Buffy cried.
He then covered the nub with his mouth and proceeded to suckle it. Buffy feel back onto the bed and clutched onto his head. She whimpered and moaned, telling him not to stop. He suckled the nub for long moments before biting it teasingly. Buffy screamed. He smiled a little before he attacked again. This time, he licked her slit before parting her lips and thrust his tongue in. It started slow, with him relishing in her hot heat, lapping her delicious juices. Buffy cried out, her voice keening as he darted his tongue in and out of her. He increased his cadence as Buffy cried louder. She panted, moaned and whimpered as he restlessly tasted her. Angel loved and was encouraged by her cries of pleasure. Buffy was surprised when she unexpectedly came, her juices flowing out of her core. She was even more surprised when Angel greedily lapped and sucked her essence, licking her clean. When he was done, he began kissing his way up to her but was suddenly pulled by the arm as Buffy began mauling his lips, moaning as he immediately plunged his tongue within her. She didn’t know why but tasting herself in his mouth suddenly made his lips more delicious. She wrapped her arms and legs around him as she bit and suckled his lips. When he pulled away, he looked down to see her still trying to recover.
“You’re so perfect”, he whispered.
“Angel, please, I want you inside”.
“Soon my love. Very soon”.
He then moved to lay beside her and gently kissed her again. When he broke the kiss, never breaking eye contact, he sucked his fingers momentarily before running them over her body. She gazed at him, not knowing what he was trying to do. She got his answer moments later when his fingers rested on her core. She felt his finger probing it before finding its destination and plunged his finger in. Her body jerked at this intrusion. Angel held her gaze as he began pulling his finger in and out of her. Her face contorted in pleasure. He then proceeded to add another finger and another before increasing the speed of his intrusion. Buffy’s body began jerking up and down at the impact. She held onto his arm as she relished in his thrusts.
“Oh my god Angel”.
His words turned her on even more than she already was. She didn’t think she could be this aroused. She was close. He leaned down to kiss her as he continued his assault. Buffy tried to kiss him back but she was too caught up with the pleasure. All she could do was kept her lips open as Angel closed his lips over hers, his tongue thrusting into her mouth. She moaned into him. When he broke away, she cried,
“What is it sweetheart?”
“I’m going to...”
“You’re going to what?”
Buffy hesitated. She wasn’t used to the erotic words that he was using but loving how it made her feel. But to hear herself say it was something else altogether.
“You’re going to what?” he sweetened his voice, as her increased his speed slightly lifting her hips of the bed.
‘What the hell’, Buffy finally thought. There’s a first time for everything.
“I’m going to come. Please…”, she whispered, her voice quivering.
Angel smiled down to her.
“I’m happy to oblige”.
He closed his lips over her again and went even faster, relentlessly thrusting into her. Moments later she had to break the kiss to cry out as the earth shattering climax came over her. She jerked her hips into his hand as he continued stroking her, aiding her to return to reality.
When she did, he covered his body with hers and kissed her thoroughly, passionately, tangling his tongue with hers. Buffy replied with equal fervour, clutching him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and pulling him down on her. He parted her thighs and immediately entered her, filling her fully with his hard strength. He broke the kiss and stared into her eyes, relishing in her heat, loving how her walls clung to him. They stayed still, both overwhelmed with emotions as he rested his forehead against hers. He began moving, slowly thrusting into her, his eyes never once leaving her face. He drove deeper, harder and Buffy’s breath hitched, his deed suddenly drove her closer to the edge. She stared at him as she panted, her breaths mixing with his as he thrust faster.
Her hands roamed his broad back as he continued moving, plunging himself into her delicious depth. Suddenly, he began thrusting her with uncontrolled speed, moving in and out of her so fast, Buffy thought she was about to topple over the edge. She widened her eyes at him clearly expressing her surprise but wrapped her legs around him as if telling him not to stop. Angel understood and began to move even faster and Buffy began to moan and whimper, trying to catch her breath as she felt herself drown in pleasure. Angel felt like he was losing control. He wanted so bad to burst as he drove himself faster and faster into her and sure enough, moments later he came, screaming her name as he spilled himself in her warmth. Buffy joined him only seconds later, quivering as he filled her. When they returned back to reality, Angel buried his face in her neck and began chanting softly, “I love you...I love you...I love you” against her ear. Buffy simply smiled and caressed his back and stroked his hair. They laid there for several minutes before Angel lifted himself and started gently kissing her before rolling over and laid beside her. Covering them with his covers, he pulled her, wrapping his arms around her as she laid her head on his chest. Again they laid in pleasing silence reminiscing what had just transpired.
“That’s a good sound...thump thump...thump thump thump”, she finally said, pressing her hand on top of his heart.
“It feels pretty amazing”, she heard him reply.
Buffy startled awake. Like all the dreams before, this was so vivid. She could feel him, feel every touch, every kiss, every...thrust. She felt a weight on her abs and looked down to see Angel’s arm, draped around her in slumber. She touched his arm and again, unlike the dream, he was cold. Why did she keep on dreaming of Angel being human? What were all the dreams about? Were they trying to tell her something? A million questions raced through her mind as she tried to sort out her thoughts. Angel stirred a little, holding her more securely before going back to deep slumber. She stroked his arm and simply laid in silence, trying to understand what was happening.
Little did she know her dreams were far from over. When she was deep in slumber, another scene played before her eyes.
Chapter 6: Conflicted
There were in his apartment and she was cleaning his wounds before helping him change into comfortable sweatpants before leading him to the bed. She carefully helped him lay down before sitting beside him on the bed. She was about to adjust the pillows to make him more comfortable but instead, Angel placed his hands on hers, stopping her. Their eyes met, Angel’s filled with intense love and hers, similar but with a hint of sadness.
“I’m just gonna adjust the pillows for you”, Buffy said.
Angel kept staring at her, his gaze never faltering as he replied,
“Could you just...hold me?”
Buffy simply smiled and moved back, leaning against the headboard, settling in a comfortable position before holding her arms open, inviting him.
Angel immediately moved into her arms placing his head on her chest. Buffy stroked his back and neck as she forced back tears, thinking how close she was to losing him, again.
“I love you Buffy”, he spoke, his voice quivering with emotions.
“Angel, what you did, it was stupid”.
“I know. I’m sorry. When Doyle said that the demon was still alive, I couldn’t just let it roam free”.
“And you shouldn’t but you could have told me. We could have faced it together”.
Angel stayed silent.
“Angel, if I was a few seconds late, you would have...” her voice quivering.
She couldn’t complete her sentence. She didn’t want to. Angel lifted his head to see her crying. His heart felt heavy, something he hadn’t felt in a really long time. It seemed to ache seeing her tears. He moved up a little so that he was face to face with her. He gently wiped her tears away, his fingers lingering, gently caressing on her face. Buffy leaned into his hand; her tears continued wetting her cheeks.
“I almost lost you”, she whispered.
Angel felt his heart literally broke when she said it. The feeling was mutual for him. When he thought he was going to lose the battle with Mohra, his thoughts were on Buffy, wondering if he could see her again. Now lying in her arms, it felt so right. It felt safe but at the same time, he feels selfish. Being human was heaven for him because he was with Buffy. He will be able to give her everything he wanted for her. He could be close to her without the constant fear of losing control, he could make love to her without fear of releasing his evil twin, he could work for the telephone company, volunteer at the red cross and perhaps one day, have little ‘vampires’. He could have a home and build a life with her. The possibilities were endless.
But, as a human, he couldn’t protect her, not like he could when he was a vampire. Today was a true testament to that. He wasn’t as strong and he knew the chances Buffy took to save him would one day cost her her life. The realisation hit him as he realised what he had to do. He had to choose.
He leaned forward and kissed her tenderly, lovingly. Buffy replied his gentle kisses, her tears still flowing freely from her eyes. His kisses grew passionate and when he broke the kiss, Buffy gazed into his eyes, which was silently telling her that he needed her, wanted her.
“But you’re hurt”, she said softly.
He didn’t reply and instead kissed her again. He kissed her for long moments, nibbling and sucking her lips. He alternated the intensity. At times he would kiss her with vigour, tangling her tongue with his and then there were times he gently nipped her soft lips as if he was relishing their mouths mating. Buffy found herself breathless and pulled away from his lips. Angel didn’t break a beat and began kissing her neck. As much as Buffy wanted him, she knew that he was not in any form to engage in copulation.
“Angel, please, you’re hurt”.
Angel caught her lips again, kissing her briefly before saying,
“I need you...please”.
Buffy hesitated briefly before kissing him again, opening her mouth wider as Angel delved his tongue in hers. She wrapped her arms around him and Angel slowly moved her down until her head was on the pillow. When he broke the kiss, he immediately removed her clothes before shedding his. Once they were bare, Buffy parted her legs and he placed himself in between hers, feeling her warm core against him. He began kissing her neck, her chest before paying attention to her breasts. His ministrations were slow and gentle, almost as if he was worshipping her.
Every kiss, every touch was gentle and intimate. He stopped his ministration and Buffy opened her eyes to see him looking down on her. His gaze for her was so intimate, so passionate. Angel took her hands and threaded her fingers with his, placing them at the side of her head before he leaned in and kissed her again, positioning himself at her core. She could feel his blunt head teasing her before he pushed forward, parting her nether lips and entered her. She broke the kiss and gasped. Angel continued entering her as his lips nuzzled her jaw. He groaned, loving his strength being inside her. He moved to gaze at her as pushed himself deeper and deeper into her. Buffy’s breath hitched. Their eyes met, their gaze for the other was loving and gentle.
Angel tightened his hold on her hand and began moving, grinding his hips against her. He made love gently, sweetly to her, taking time to allow his strength to feel every bit of her. Angel grinded faster, not once did they take their eyes off the other. Their breath suddenly erratic, Angel could feel himself brimming as he continued delving in her pool of heat. Buffy writhe beneath him, giving herself up to the pleasure he was giving her, clasping his fingers as he continued grinding her, filling her with his strength. He leaned in and began kissing her, thrusting his tongue into her and suddenly, he came, spilling his seed in her. When they recovered, he kissed her tenderly, his hands caressing her face, her arms and body. He broke the kiss and stared into her eyes, tears pooling in his eyes.
Buffy reached up and caressed his face, her fingers lingering, tracing his beautiful masculine features. Angel leaned into her touch and when her fingers roamed across his lips, he gently suckled them. Tears began rolling down his cheeks knowing that he had a difficult decision to make, knowing that tonight might be the last time he could hold her, kiss her.
“Angel?” Buffy questioned as she gently wiped his tears away, searching his eyes.
Angel kept on crying, his eyes intent on hers.
“Tell me you love me” Angel said.
Buffy was confused. Angel was acting so weirdly.
“Please..”, he begged.
Still Buffy didn’t say anything, her eyes questioning him.
“I need to hear it” he continued. ’For one last time’, Angel silently added.
Buffy frowned, not understanding his actions. Before she could respond, he leaned down kissing her, tears still flowing from his eyes. His kisses turned deep and passionate and by the time they broke the kiss, Buffy was overwhelmed with lust and emotions. Looking at him, she knew he was still waiting for her to say it. She stroked his face and softly said,
“I love you...I love you so very much”.
With that, Angel continued kissing her, just as passionate, just as loving. Buffy nudged him, rolling them, switching their positions. She broke the kiss and sat up straddling him. Angel followed suit, wrapping his arms around her lithe body and leaned into her for another kiss. He flexed his fingers on her back squashing Buffy to him. Not that she minded but Buffy realised that he was holding onto her a little too tight, his kisses were a little too passionate and he was clingy. When they broke the kiss yet again, his eyes was still teary. Buffy began to worry.
“What’s wrong baby?” she cooed, her hands stroking his back trying to sooth him. Angel simply shook his head and smiled weakly, gazing into her eyes.
Angel placed a finger on her lips.
“Shhh...just kiss me”.
And she did. Tenderly, languidly before giving into the tongue tangling kiss that usually anticipated the ardour they were familiar with. Moments later, Angel gently lifted her and immediately immersed himself within her. They broke the kiss and simply stared into each other’s eyes. Slowly, they began to move, relishing in the intimacy.
“Will you love me forever?” he whispered to her as she pushed herself down onto him.
Though confused and drowning in lust, Buffy answered,
“Please don’t stop loving me”.
“Never”, she said before kissing him again.
Almost as if she was trying to convince him of her feelings for him, Buffy repeated her declaration over and over again in between their kisses. When their lovemaking was becoming more passionate, Angel clung to her as she grinded him. She began lifting herself up and down his shaft, Angel helped her, cupping her rear as she moved. When they felt themselves coming closer to the ecstasy they so desperately wanted, they moved faster. Angel sunk his head on the crook of her neck, the lust Buffy brought him cannot be denied. Sure enough they came moments later, both screaming in sheer bliss.
They gently kiss when they recovered, taking time to nip, lick, suck and peck the lips. When they broke the kiss, Angel gently pushed Buffy down onto the bed, lovingly gazed into her eyes and added,
“You are my whole world. My everything”.
Buffy smiled at his declaration.
That night, he continued making love to her countless times, almost as if he couldn’t get enough of her. There were times when they did it with passion and vigour and at times, soft and gentle. They made love with her on top of him, riding him, her hands roaming his broad back. They made love in lotus position with Angel pushing her up and down his shaft as she nuzzled her face to his, whispering erotic loving words to each other. And then there was once where they kneeled with Angel placing himself behind her, his hands covering her mounds, his lips mauling hers as he thrust himself deep in her. The ecstasy swept through them over and over again as they clung to each other, needing the physical and emotional contact to convince themselves that the other was alright. They rocked and rode till it was break of dawn before exhaustion overcame them and they surrendered themselves to slumber.
Angel woke to find her still asleep in his arms, her head resting on his shoulder, her hand resting over his beating heart. His arm wrapped possessively around her. He looked at the time and he knew that he had to make a choice. Carefully, he peeled himself off her. Buffy stirred, whimpering in her sleep over the loss of his warmth. Angel stayed still for some moments, afraid that she might wake up, thankful when she didn’t.
He slowly got out of bed, wincing a little at his wounds, and pulled out a sweater and pants from his closet. He turned to look at his blonde goddess. Tears stung his eyes as he gazed over her, trying to memorize her arms, her gentle hands; holding him tightly during their love making, her features that was so beautiful; contorted in erotic beauty when he filled her over and over again, her slender legs; wrapped around his hips in passion and her body, her beautiful flawless body; providing him warmth and comfort, perfectly fitting in his embrace.
He walked over to her, a solitary tear rolling down his cheek as he looked over her. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, her nose before settling on her lips, gently pecking them. She moaned but still didn’t wake up. He didn’t want to leave her.
He wished he could be selfish and just stay in her arms forever but he’ll be damned before he let anything happen to her. With a heavy heart, he walked away from her, turning one last time to gaze upon the only woman he will ever love.
“Angel!” Buffy sat up, startled.
Her chest heaved. She looked around in the dark, still confused, her eyes searching for the love of her life.
“Hey”, she heard him.
She turned and relief washed over her to see the dark chocolate pools staring at her. She immediately wrapped her arms around him and sobbed.
Angel tried soothing her, his arms tightly embracing her as he smoothed his hands over her back. She kept crying and Angel grew worried. There was no doubt in his mind that she was dreaming again. What were the dreams about? Why couldn’t she tell him? He heard mumbling in her sleep but when she screamed for him when she woke up; he knew that her dreams had something to do with him.
When he felt her calm down a little, he gently pulled away from her and cupped her chin, tilting her face to his. Her eyes still filled with tears. With his thumb, he gently wiped her tears away.
“I...saw you....you were leaving...” she sobbed, her voice quivering with emotions.
“You left and...”she couldn’t complete the sentence and leaned into him again; fresh tears rolling down her cheeks.
Angel simply held her, gently caressing her back trying his best to comfort her.
“Buffy, please tell me what’s wrong. What is it about your dream that’s scaring you? I need to know...please” Angel begged.
After what seems like long minutes, she answered a broken okay.
Angel placed the tea on the table as they settled on the couch, seated facing each other, his hand tightly held hers, his thumb caressing the back of her hand.
Buffy took a deep breath before starting,
“Lately, I’ve been having this dream...about us.”
“The dreams are telling me some sort of story. Like as if I was an audience watching a movie about us in my head. Sometimes they were recurring, at times they’re not”.
“I saw you. We were together...happy”, she managed to smile.
“But...in my dream, you were warm... you were alive...you kissed me in sunlight.”
Angel’s eyes widened. ‘It can’t be...Could it?’ Angel silently thought. He tried to keep a straight face as he waited for her to continue.
“I saw us in the apartment you used to have at your office. We were in bed, eating ice cream, chocolate, peanut butter...we made love.”
Another moment of silence as Buffy frowned, trying to recall the dreams.
“And then, there were times I was crying. You cried too and...you held me tightly in your arms and I remember saying, ‘I’ll never forget’...I don’t understand any of this. You were human and we were together. At first I thought it was nothing but then, it felt real...to me. It’s like I was there...watching us, everything we did I could see. But then, I could feel everything, like it was really me in the bed with you...crying with you. Like I wasn’t really watching you know?”
Buffy sighed, running her hand through her hair, clearly exasperated.
“I know I’m not making any sense to you and it’s all still a bit hazy for me too but somehow I feel like it wasn’t dream. It was real”, she continued.
“What else do you remember?”Angel asked, thankful that his voice sounded normal, despite the fact that his apparently dead heart felt like it was racing, nervous about her answer.
“Feelings mostly. I could feel everything. Every kiss...every touch...everything. I could even taste the ice cream...the chocolate and peanut butter melting in my mouth. I remember feeling happy, complete...peaceful. It felt right. I was in your arms...it was perfect”, her voice quivering.
“I remember being upset...heartbroken...Angel, in the dream, I lost you and I felt like I couldn’t breathe...like I was dying. That was why I didn’t want to say anything...I feel like if I said it, it makes it real to me somehow and...I just can’t imagine”, she said as tears rolled down her cheeks.
Angel wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed into his shoulder.
“Shhh...We’ll be okay”, he coaxed.
“We don’t know that. Angel, the last dream, I saw you walking away from me. What if you’ll leave me again?”
“I won’t. I promise I won’t.”
Buffy looked up to him, terrified of what was to come.
“You promised me in the dream too. You said you’ll never leave me and you did. Angel, I can’t live without you.”
Angel scooped her up into his lap and hugged her tightly to him. Buffy clung to him, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks.
“I’m scared Angel.”
“Shhhh...You don’t have to be. I’ll never leave you. I promise. Please believe me”, Angel pleaded.
He simply held her as she kept on crying. His hands roamed around her small back, flexing his hand on her shoulders. He gently kissed her neck and whispered comforting words in her ear but his mind was racing.
This cannot be. She wasn’t supposed to remember. They promised him that!
Chapter 7: Savior
Angel paced the floor, his patience running thin as he waited to gain entry to see the oracles. He did everything right. The steps, the chant, the mystical powder that was supposed to be the key to opening the gateway…he did it all and yet, he still wasn’t allowed entry.
Growing frustrated by the minute, he had half a mind to bang on the brick wall but only stopped knowing that it’s fruitless. The door was a magical one…breaking the brick wall wouldn’t do anything.
After what seems like hours, the glow appeared and the wall became a passage for him to enter.
“Come before us” the male oracle bellowed.
Angel took angry confident strides, glowering at them.
“What have you brought us?” the female one asked.
“Brought? You must know why I’m here. Do you think I would bring any offering for you?”
“What is it you seek?” the male one asked.
“We had a deal. You turned back the clock and she won’t remember.”
“Don’t!…Don’t stand there and pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. It’s insulting!”
“Know your place, warrior. Have care when you speak.”
“People like me and Buffy have died, fought, lost and had everything taken away from us and yet we still stand here, continuing to fight because we don’t have a choice…the fight is never over. The world out there is harsh and dark. Every minion from hell have tried and will continue to try and squeeze their way through to wreak havoc and take over but we have stopped them time and time again. We have protected the world with all that we have so don’t stand there and talk to me about my place!”
The oracles exchanged a look before the female asked, “What is it you wish to know?”
“Why is she shown the day she was supposed to forget? What was the point in turning back time if she is remembering it now?”
“You know as well as we do that sometimes, things don’t work the way it is supposed to. It happened before with your son”.
“That was different! This…this was willed by you!...by the Powers…not some agreement that I made with the forces of evil.”
“To be honest, we are in the dark as well”.
“We were approached by a messenger of the Powers and were informed that she will remember the day. Why exactly we do not know”.
“If you can’t give me answers then bring me someone who can.”
“It is not that simple”.
“Make it simple then. I am not leaving this place until I have some answers”.
“And you will” another loud voice bellowed.
The being was tall, his stature large and he was wearing a yellow toga-like costume and was glowing. The oracles was clearly surprised but bowed before him.
“Eminent Senior”, they greeted.
Eminent stood before Angel and looked upon him.
“Who are you?”Angel asked.
“As they said, I am Eminent Senior”.
Angel was unfazed, “And that is supposed to mean something to me?”
“I am a high priest of the Powers. I can answer of what you seek”.
“Then answer me”.
“The answers that you seek may not be what you want to hear”.
“Just tell me”.
The being looked at Angel for a few moments before continuing.
“Turning back time was not a part of what was supposed to happen. It is not the work of the oracles to change fate. You were supposed to face the demon and supposed to turn human. It was written”.
“Have you not wondered after over 240 years of existence wandering this earth in solitude, why was it you crave companionship after seeing the slayer? Nature has designed the two of you to be mortal enemies and yet, you fell for her at first sight.”
“My soul…it made me feel…”
“Do you think your soul was given to you as penance for your crimes?”
“Is it not?”
“There is a prophecy of the end of time where evil reigned supreme and the world falls into darkness. There is no humanity left…only demons and monsters. Every fight and war you have won only delayed the inevitable end of time where they will walk the earth. But then, we were shown a vision…there was a beacon of hope being presented to us. A light that could be conceived. It will shine so bright that evil will obliterate and we shall have peace.”
Angel fought the urge to roll his eyes. There was no such thing as world peace.
“You have been presented a chance to be human time and time again and time and time again, you have rejected it but what you do not understand is that some gifts are meant to be yours no matter how much you don’t want it”.
“I belong in this world fighting. I am no use to you as a human”.
“But that’s where you are wrong. Your purpose as a human was supposed to serve something far greater”.
“Really?...what’s that?” Angel asked nonchalantly.
“The light to fight the ultimate evil...is a creation of yourself and the slayer.”
Angel frowned and the words of the demon he fought suddenly came forefront to his mind, ‘She carries…the slayer bears and she will die before it comes’.
“On the day that you turned human, you and the Slayer conceived a child. That child is the light…the brightness that will save the world one day. All that has happened that day was supposed to be.”
“But she would die and so would the people we were meant to help. I can’t…”
“Death is inevitable; even for her.”
“Now that she is remembering…does it mean that she will…”
“No…after all that you have been through, it is unjust to have it taken away from you. Here are the new terms; we will return your humanity with no repercussion. Your vampiric prowess, strength and healing ability shall remain. You will continue to be a Champion for the powers but age, live and die like any mortal man.”
Angel stared at the being, speechless. His mind reeling.
“You shall share a life with the slayer and no interference will come to harm your relationship. You have my word. Your purpose now is to love, protect and mould your child like any parent would and when the time comes, he or she will defend and fight for this world just like you and the slayer”.
“What if I refuse your offer?”
“There is no room for bargain here. It is willed and it will happen. This is not a war or prophecy you can thwart. This is fate and destiny that is beyond even the Powers.”
“My child is no warrior”.
“Your child is more than that. He or she will be strong…stronger than you or the slayer..special…a protector of the world.”
“I don’t accept that”.
“Not now but one day…one day you will understand…”
And in a flash, Angel was back on the cold concrete floor, gasping for breath. He inhaled as he willed his lungs to work, trying to make his body remember how to function after not living for over 250 years. His heart was beating; his pulse coming to life. He was alive.
Chapter 8: Truth
Angel trudged back to his apartment, feeling confused. He could feel all his senses still heightened. His sight, his smell, his hearing…was just as…if not more sensitive than when he was a vampire. He opened the door and sees the love of his life pacing.
“Hey, you’re back”, Buffy greeted Angel, her face smiling, relieved that he was safe.
His eyes gazed at her flat stomach, suddenly hearing the faint thump of their child’s heart. How could he have missed it before? A surge of happiness washed over him. Buffy and he conceived on their wonderful day together. The day she couldn’t remember…oh god, how does he even begin to explain to her?
“What’s wrong?” she questioned, seeing his uncertain expression.
“We need to talk”, he began.
“The last time you said that we broke up”, she said sarcastically, laughing a little.
Still Angel’s face was sombre. Immediately sensing the tension, she simply said okay and found herself anxious for his answer. Angel walked over to her and took her hand, threading them with his and led her to their plush sofa.
For long moments he didn’t say anything, he simply held her hand and gently caressing the back of it with his other hand.
In her apprehension of seeing Angel’s solemn mood, she completely missed out the feeling of his warm hands currently grasping hers.
He looked up at her; the beautiful face that never fails to soothe him in his darkest hours and yet, at this very moment, the same beautiful face is causing uproar to his newly beating heart.
“Buffy, do you have any idea how much I love you?”
Buffy didn’t answer. She simply gazed at him.
“I don’t think I can ever explain how much I feel for you. There are probably no words for it and...”
“Angel please...just tell me what’s going on”, Buffy cutting him, unable to withstand the suspense.
Angel took a few moments of silence before beginning,
“The dreams...that you’ve been having...what if I told you it wasn’t a dream?”
“What?...what do you mean?”
“A few months after we broke up, I went back to Sunnydale because I heard that you were in danger. I followed you...stalked you in the shadows and when I was sure that you were safe, I left. You didn’t even know I was there. At least I thought you didn’t know”.
Buffy remembered the memory. How could she forget?
“It was Thanksgiving.”
“Yeah. You were attacked by Native American spirits...called themselves...”
“Schumash Tribe...I remember...but what...”
“You came to LA upset. You wanted to tell me that what I did was not okay”.
“That you didn’t have the right anymore. I remember Angel...what are you getting at?”
Angel took a deep breath before asking,
“What else do you remember?”
“I was upset. Told you off, you tried to explain and I didn’t really feel like listening.”
“Do you remember how long you were at my office that day?”
“I don’t know. Ten...Fifteen minutes maybe?”
Angel took another unnecessary deep breath before saying,
“Do you remember the demon that came through the window?”
Buffy frowned again, trying to recall.
“Yeah, you smashed some jewel in its head and it was gone in like a minute”.
“It wasn’t that way initially. It didn’t die. In fact, it got away. We tracked it and we...”
“We? Angel, I think I would recall if we went hunting but no such thing happened.”
“It did. The demon is called the Mohra demon. Its blood has regenerative properties. It attacked us in the office and it got away the first time. We searched for it and we split up. I managed to track it and I fought it and some of its blood mixed with mine. When its blood mixed with mine...”
Angel stopped and carefully studied her as he said, “I became human”.
Buffy eyes widened at his confession
“The dreams that you’re having...it isn’t just a dream. It was real. You were not here for ten or fifteen minutes. You were with me for one whole day and one whole night.”
“The dreams...everything that we did...it was real?”
“Then why don’t I remember?”
“Because being human had a price. It was a price I wasn’t willing to pay”.
“What was it?”
“Your life...I couldn’t protect you or others if I stayed human...so the Oracles gave me an option. They reversed the effects by taking back the day...as though it didn’t happen and I killed Mohra again before its blood makes me mortal. They turned back the clock and restarted the day and that was the day that the world remembers.”
“But you knew how to kill it. If they took back the day as though it didn’t happen, how did you know how to kill it?”
“Because I’m the only one that remembers the real day.”
Buffy pulled her hand away from him.
“And I agreed to it?” she asked.
Angel didn’t answer. Buffy understood his silence.
“Let me guess. You already made the deal before telling me”, she concluded.
“Buffy, it was a hard decision for me.”
“Which you made without me!”
“I knew if I told you, you would have wanted me to stay human...and I won’t stay human if it meant I’ll lose you”, Angel reasoned.
“We had everything we’ve ever wanted and you took it away and what’s worse is that you won’t even let me remember?”
“Do you think it was easy living with this memory?? Knowing what we could have had? For years I lived with the pain of giving up the chance to live a normal perfect life with you. Do you know how hard it was? How painful?”
She knew he was right but she was too damn upset to care. She gave him one hard disappointing look and walked away. He began to chase after her, worried about her safety knowing there was bounty on her…
Buffy was almost out of the door when a large, burly demon suddenly appeared and whacked her, sending her flying across the room.
“Buffy!” Angel screamed before attacking the perpetrator.
The demon recovered from Angel’s attacks before landing one solid punch that caused Angel’s head to spin. His gaze focused back on Buffy who was trying to stand up, clearly still disoriented from the blow she took.
Angel grew furious as he saw the demon advancing towards her. He quickly jumped on the demon’s back and wrapped an arm around its impossibly large neck, trying to choke the life out of it. The demon backed up and slammed Angel harshly against the wall, making Angel lose his grip and came crumpling down onto the floor.
“Stay down! I have no interest in you. I am here for the bounty.”
Angel punched the demon in his face, breaking his nose and sent him reeling back cupping the broken appendage.
“Sorry, but the bounty is spoken for”.
The man screamed in rage before pouncing onto Angel and lifted him by the lapels of his jacket and slamming him against the wall.
“You would risk your life for another?”
Angel chuckled at the moron-ity of the demon. How could it possibly understand? “Love makes you do the wacky”, Angel replied before head butting the demon.
The demon shrilled in pain, as Angel further break his already distorted nose. The demon screamed in anger and advanced towards Angel with determined steps only to halt with eyes wide open and dropped heavily onto the ground. Dead.
Angel looked up to see Buffy standing with a sword in hand, the demon’s blood dripping from the blade. He slowly got up, wincing at the pain and slowly hobbled over to her.
“Are you okay?” cupping her chin to make her look at him. She had a gash on her forehead and there was a bruise on her left arm from hitting the wall when the demon threw her across the room.
“I should be asking you that”, seeing that Angel was way worse than her with blood flowing from his lips and forehead, how he couldn’t move his right hand indicating he probably busted his shoulder and the hobble would mean his legs were injured.
“Looks worse than it feels”.
Her anger was momentarily forgotten and she was reaching up for his cheek when a crash through the window showed four demons entering. Hearing an inhuman roar, they looked to see three more running towards their apartment.
“Shit! Second wave”, Angel muttered. Drawing up his strength and trying his best to ignore the various pain he feels, he reached for his sword from their weapons chest nearby and prepared to fight the four that crashed in.
Buffy ran towards the door and manage to slam it close just before the three was about to step through the door.
She leaned her back against the door in relief only for said relief to be dashed when a spear drove through the door narrowly missing her ear. Gripping her sword tighter, she took an offensive stance preparing herself for the melee about to ensue.
When the last demon Buffy was fighting fell at her feet did she stopped, waiting in case the demons were just faking their death to trick her into letting her guard down. When she was convinced they wouldn’t rise again, did she allow herself to sigh in relief.
She immediately looked for Angel. She walked into their guest room to see him lying face down, unconscious.
‘No!’ she though and ran towards her lover.
She turned him over and laid his head on her lap, calling him, trying to rouse him.
“Please…please wake up”.
Ten minutes later, Angel’s eyes fluttered open and Buffy thanked whichever god that was listening to her silent prayers. Angel slowly sat up and began looking over Buffy, frowning over the additional injuries she got.
“I’m okay. Don’t worry about me”, she answered knowing he was worried.
She reached and wiped the blood from his lips before leaning down and gently kissing him. Angel reciprocated the kiss and gently placed his hand on her back, not wanting to cause her more pain knowing she had a few bruises on her back.
When the kiss started to deepen, both reluctantly pulled away and exclaimed an “Ow” at the pain the action caused on their bruised lips. They both chuckled.
“Looks like no French kissing for the time being”, Buffy joked and Angel pouted.
Buffy looked around and sighed. “Well, suffice to say our apartment is completely thrashed”.
“You did say you wanted to remodel the place”, Angel jibed.
Buffy smiled at him and looked at the demons and silently cursed, wishing they were vampires. At least vampires would just leave ashes.
“I’ll call AI and get them to send a cleaning crew over”, he slowly stood before wrapping his left arm around Buffy’s waist to help her up.
“Let’s just stay at the Hyperion tonight. We can’t possibly stay here”, Angel suggested.
“And how do you suppose we get there? We can barely walk and we’re leaning on each other just to make sure we don’t fall flat on our faces”.
“We heal fast. We’ll be okay within the hour so let’s just wait out until then”.
“That’s a whole lot of demons tonight”.
“I have never seen so many demons sent after me since…” Buffy trailed and frown, seeing something familiar on one of the demons.
“What is it?”
Buffy walked over to the nearest demon and saw the familiar ring before going to another one and searched its fingers finding the same ring on its right finger. After looking at the fourth demon she knew.
“Order of Taaraka.”
“Angel, these demons are assassins. They tried to kill me before. Someone wants me dead”.
“Something is coming, Angel…and they want me out of the way”.
‘I know’ he almost said but kept his mouth shut. He knew he wasn’t off the hook with erasing her memories and now with him hiding the fact that there was bounty on her will only anger her more.
“The last time Spike and Druscilla sent them was so that I would be distracted and they could kill you and now with those dreams…What if those dreams are prophecies? Trying to warn me before something happen to you?”
“Angel, I can’t…I can’t…I can’t lose you”, Buffy began to panic.
Angel held her shoulders and made her look at him.
“You won’t. I’m not going anywhere. Period.”
“We need to find out what’s happening. Who sent them, what do they want. I want answers!”
“We will get them”.
Buffy wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest. Angel kissed her head and tightly held her against him. With him being so close to her, she could feel a light thump against her lips…how warm he was…it can’t be..
“I’ll tell you everything but not here. Let’s go to the Hyperion”.
Chapter 9: Acceptance
Buffy was in Angel’s old bedroom, trying to clean and tend her wounds. She unbuttoned her top halfway and gently peeled her shirt off her shoulder and winced at the wounds on her back as she tried to wipe the blood off with a warm damp towel. It proved to be difficult as she felt the pain intensify as she tried to manoeuvre her hand to her back. In moments she felt a masculine hand touching her shoulder.
“Let me help”, Angel offered.
“It’s okay”, she said as she shrugged her shirt back on.
Angel turned her around to face him, giving her an intent gaze, indicating that he wasn’t backing down as he grabbed the damp cloth and simply pulled her by the hand and led her to their bed. Buffy surprisingly obliged. He sat her down and took his place behind her. He reached around and began to slowly unbutton her shirt and peeled it off before unclasping her bra and dropping it on the floor. Angel grimaced at the wounds masking her otherwise flawless, delicate back. He gently pressed the damp cloth on the wound and she winced.
“Sorry”, he apologised.
Moments of silence went by as he continued nursing her wound. Thoughts filled up both their thoughts, clearly of the events that had unravelled.
“So…” Buffy started, waiting for Angel to continue.
Angel took his time, gently wiping each cut and bruise as if trying to buy time before he finally spoke,
“I went to see the Oracles…to get some answers. You were not supposed to remember the day. That was why they turned back time. There must be a reason why you are remembering”.
“What did they say?”
“A few nights ago, I heard there was a bounty out for you”.
“So, the Order…it was for me…”
“Yes and no.”
“The Oracles told me of a darkness that is coming…it’ll be in a long time but it’s coming. This darkness is worse than anything either of us has ever faced. Worse than our usual apocalypse. When this thing comes forth, it’ll be the end of time.”
“So we stop it”.
“Apparently we can’t. The end of time is inevitable but the Powers were given a vision…some form of hope that there is a saviour…”
“Okay, so it must mean somehow we found a way to stop it…like we always do”.
“Not just us…the bounty wasn’t just for you…Buffy, on the day they turned back, we…”
Buffy turned to face him.
Angel looked at the face he has loved for over 100 years and braved himself to utter the next few words.
“We created something beautiful”, he finally said and placed his palm on her stomach.
Buffy frowned as she looked down at his hand, her eyes widening. Could it be?
“What…what are you saying?” she nervously asked, her heart thumping to hear his answer.
“You’re pregnant” he caressed her stomach.
Tears filled her eyes and she felt breathless. Pregnant? She was going to have a baby?
Buffy frowned as she realised what her baby meant.
“So, you’re saying that our baby is the saviour”.
Angel didn’t answer. He didn’t need to. His silence said it all.
“No…”Buffy shook her head…”No…my baby is not some weapon for the Powers..No!”
She turned and picked up her discarded top and quickly putting it on.
“No Angel…this is our baby..not some saviour...he or she will know nothing but love and happiness and normal..our baby will be a normal, healthy kid...”
“And he or she will…I won’t let anything happen to our child or you”, Angel assured her.
Buffy breathed a sigh of relief and wrapped her arms around him, seeing determination in his eyes. Her baby will be safe. Both she and Angel will make sure of it. She took deep breaths and willed herself to calm down.
Minutes later, she noticed. How warm Angel was…how she could feel his heartbeat. She slowly unwrapped her arms from him and held her palm against his chest.
“What about this?”
“They said this was meant to be. I was supposed to remain human.”
“Is it permanent?”
“They promised no repercussions. I still have my healing abilities, heightened senses and strength but like you I’m only human now.”
“Just like that?”
“Just like that.”
“You believe them?”
“They have no reason to lie”.
“What about you?”
“Is this something you want?...that you won’t wake up one day and give back your humanity?” Buffy spoke against his chest, not wanting to look into his eyes.
Angel cupped her chin and made her look at him, “I didn’t regret what I did” Angel finally spoke. When she didn’t reply he continued, “I hated the decision I made but if I were to do it again, I won’t change a thing.”
He waited few beats before adding, “I would never choose anything over your life. Ever. I’d give anything for your life...even my own...if it meant keeping you alive.”
Buffy eyes teared hearing his confession. As much as she was upset over what he did, she understood why he did it. The other part of her also knew that living with those memories was no easy ride for Angel.
“How did you do it? Living with the memories. I don’t know if I could go on knowing what we could...” Buffy finally said.
Angel took a few moments before answering,
“It was hard. At times, it was a painful reminder...of what I could have had...but at times, when I feel like I’m drowning in darkness and when there are days that just gets too hard, the memories become my solace...and when you...when you were...gone...there were times I thought I couldn’t move on...times when I missed you soo much that I thought I couldn’t make it through the night...the memories were all that sustained me.”
Tears began rolling down her cheeks. Angel gently wiped her tears before leading her back to their bed and finished cleaning her wounds.
When he was done, he placed the box of their first-aid supplies away and looked at her. He cupped her face, gently caressing her brow, cheek and lips before leaning forward and began tenderly kissing her neck moving to her shoulders. Buffy closed her eyes, relishing in his warm touch. He felt so different and yet familiar at the same time.
Angel began nipping her cheeks as emotions overwhelmed her and she immediately covered her lips with his, passionately kissing him as fresh tears began rolling down her cheeks.
“I love you”, Buffy said brokenly when they broke the kiss.
Angel gently cupped her face and shook his head, wiping her tears with his thumb.
“I love you too” he replied before moving forward and kissing her again.
Buffy replied his kisses with vigour, suddenly hungry for his loving touch. He lifted her and placed her on his lap. She immediately straddled him. Angel hovered his hands around her body, wanting to touch her soft skin but too afraid that he’ll hurt her. Sensing his hesitation, she broke the kiss and reached for his hands and drew them around her and resting them on her back. He went willingly, his fingers gingerly touching her injured back as she kissed him again and released her hold on his hands to wrap her arms around his broad shoulders. She broke the kiss again, her breath erratic as she took one of his masculine hands and guided them to cup her breast. She covered her hands on top his, guiding his hand to squeeze her breast.
Soon, Angel did it on his own. She stared into his eyes and saw doubt amidst the love he has for her. She kissed him and moaned louder, relishing the feel of his hand on her chest. She took his hand again and this time guided him to her core and pressed his hand in. He broke the kiss and stifled a groan.
She was wet and ready for him. His pants soon melded with hers as he stared lovingly into her beautiful face. “I want you Buffy”, he moaned. She matched his passion and drew him down over her as she laid on the bed. They continued kissing, nipping at each others’ lips, duelling tongues and gripping arms. He felt her hands fumbling with his pants and he helped her. Soon, he was as nude as she was. He broke off the kiss and stared down at her.
She reached up and touched his face, gently stroking his eyes and cheeks. His eyes caught the nasty marks on her wrist, no doubt was caused by the demons. He took both her hands and stared at the bruises as felt his anger rise within. He looked into her eyes and saw the love shining through. “I’m okay”, she said reassuring him, her voice full of tenderness.
He leaned down and kissed her bruised wrists with all the longing in his heart. She pushed his face up to face her and tenderly wiped his tears. “I’m alright”, she reassured him again before drawing him down and kissed him. She plundered her tongue into his mouth and wrapped her arms around his neck drawing him close. She roamed her hands on his broad back, stroking it as if soothing him. She pushed her hips up against his hardening shaft, wanting him to take her, claim her.
Angel broke the kiss and stared at her, feeling his shaft growing harder and he surrendered to her warmth, entering her with extreme gentleness. She hissed at the contact. Angel’s shaft was now warm, pulsating burning her with sensual intensity. She moved her hips up, wanting him deeper into her. Angel gasped as she allowed him to sink into her. He was overwhelmed with emotions as she continued pushing herself up while cupping his rear, pushing him down deeper into her. She started rotating her hips, enticing him to grind her. Angel could feel his desire mounting as he timidly started grinding. She hugged him tighter, wanting him close to her.
He felt himself grew harder as she pushed her hips up. Buffy kissed his neck, suckling it. Growing in confidence, he started thrusting, slow and deep, making love sweetly to her. She moaned his name as she felt herself teetering close to the edge. “Buffy...” he cried as he nuzzled her jaw, relishing in her heat, feeling his release drawing close. She dug her fingers in his back willing him closer as she gently tugged his head to face her. Locking their eyes, she told him, “I love you”. He repeated before lowering his head capturing his lips ravenously, her peak mounting. Angel kissed her with equal fervour as he thrust deeper. Soon, he felt the orgasmic pleasure sweep through his cold form for long endless moments leaving him sated and content. She joined him only moments later crying out his name, shuddering in his arms. He collapsed over her as he waited for reality to return.
“We’re having a baby”, Buffy said once they have calmed their racing hearts.
“Yeah”, Angel said, his hands drawing soothing circles on her back.
“A part of me hates that our baby is some saviour for the Powers”.
“And the other part?”
“And the other part is happy…it’s like everything I’ve ever dreamed of is coming true.”
“You dreamed of having a baby?”
“I dreamed of having a baby with you…I dreamed of a life with you…and now, despite the circumstances we are in, I am happy that things are falling into place”.
Angel tilt her chin up to look into her eyes.
“I dreamed of a life with you too”.
Buffy smiled and leaned up to kiss him. When they broke away, she laid back on his chest.
“Do you believe all that fate stuff they said about us?”
“A part of me does.”
“And the other part?”, she repeated.
“I’m close to 300, Buffy. I’ve lived long enough to know that this fate thing sometimes is not what it seems. I do know this…When we first met, I fell in love with you. You can say that it was fate…maybe it was the Powers that showed you to me…I was given the option to help you or continue to rot in some alley for the rest of my unlife. But I chose to follow you to Sunnydale. I didn’t blindly fall in love with you. I walked into this knowing that our love was forbidden..that it could never be. I know we were from different worlds and yet, I choose to continue loving you. Even when we were apart and I convinced myself that you were better off without me, I still choose to love you. The Powers and fate can take credit for us being together but I know that in any lifetime, in any world, I’ll always choose to love you and fate have nothing to do with that.”
Angel reached down to touch her stomach and continued.
“They told me our baby was conceived to be a saviour for the world. I honestly don’t care how or why he or she was conceived. All this talk about being a damn saviour, I couldn’t care less. All I know is that our love created this beautiful life and that’s it. I’ll do anything in my power to protect him or her with all that I have.”
Buffy smiled through her tears and gave him one final kiss before leaning back down and allowed his newly beating heart to lull her to sleep.
Life was hard for a slayer…at times dangerous…but here in this moment, she was a normal girl lying in the arms of her newly normal boyfriend, their hands were clasped lying still on her belly where their child was…come what may, she will fight for their love, for their baby, for their chance of finally being a family and so will he…life is far from perfect but she decided from this day forth, life will be good.