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The Day That Never Were

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Buffy was in Angel’s old bedroom, trying to clean and tend her wounds. She unbuttoned her top halfway and gently peeled her shirt off her shoulder and winced at the wounds on her back as she tried to wipe the blood off with a warm damp towel. It proved to be difficult as she felt the pain intensify as she tried to manoeuvre her hand to her back. In moments she felt a masculine hand touching her shoulder.

“Let me help”, Angel offered.

“It’s okay”, she said as she shrugged her shirt back on.

Angel turned her around to face him, giving her an intent gaze, indicating that he wasn’t backing down as he grabbed the damp cloth and simply pulled her by the hand and led her to their bed. Buffy surprisingly obliged. He sat her down and took his place behind her. He reached around and began to slowly unbutton her shirt and peeled it off before unclasping her bra and dropping it on the floor. Angel grimaced at the wounds masking her otherwise flawless, delicate back. He gently pressed the damp cloth on the wound and she winced.

“Sorry”, he apologised.

Moments of silence went by as he continued nursing her wound. Thoughts filled up both their thoughts, clearly of the events that had unravelled.

“So…” Buffy started, waiting for Angel to continue.

Angel took his time, gently wiping each cut and bruise as if trying to buy time before he finally spoke,

“I went to see the Oracles…to get some answers. You were not supposed to remember the day. That was why they turned back time. There must be a reason why you are remembering”.

“What did they say?”

“A few nights ago, I heard there was a bounty out for you”.

“So, the Order…it was for me…”

“Yes and no.”

“The Oracles told me of a darkness that is coming…it’ll be in a long time but it’s coming. This darkness is worse than anything either of us has ever faced. Worse than our usual apocalypse. When this thing comes forth, it’ll be the end of time.”

“So we stop it”.

“Apparently we can’t. The end of time is inevitable but the Powers were given a vision…some form of hope that there is a saviour…”

“Okay, so it must mean somehow we found a way to stop it…like we always do”.

“Not just us…the bounty wasn’t just for you…Buffy, on the day they turned back, we…”

Buffy turned to face him.

“We what…”

Angel looked at the face he has loved for over 100 years and braved himself to utter the next few words.

“We created something beautiful”, he finally said and placed his palm on her stomach.

Buffy frowned as she looked down at his hand, her eyes widening. Could it be?

“What…what are you saying?” she nervously asked, her heart thumping to hear his answer.

“You’re pregnant” he caressed her stomach.

Tears filled her eyes and she felt breathless. Pregnant? She was going to have a baby?

“Preg…pregnant?...I’m pregnant?”

“Yeah”.

Buffy frowned as she realised what her baby meant.

“So, you’re saying that our baby is the saviour”.

Angel didn’t answer. He didn’t need to. His silence said it all.

“No…”Buffy shook her head…”No…my baby is not some weapon for the Powers..No!”

She turned and picked up her discarded top and quickly putting it on.

“Buffy…”

“No Angel…this is our baby..not some saviour...he or she will know nothing but love and happiness and normal..our baby will be a normal, healthy kid...”

“And he or she will…I won’t let anything happen to our child or you”, Angel assured her.

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief and wrapped her arms around him, seeing determination in his eyes. Her baby will be safe. Both she and Angel will make sure of it. She took deep breaths and willed herself to calm down.

Minutes later, she noticed. How warm Angel was…how she could feel his heartbeat. She slowly unwrapped her arms from him and held her palm against his chest.

“What about this?”

“They said this was meant to be. I was supposed to remain human.”

“Is it permanent?”

“They promised no repercussions. I still have my healing abilities, heightened senses and strength but like you I’m only human now.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

“You believe them?”

“They have no reason to lie”.

“What about you?”

“Me?”

“Is this something you want?...that you won’t wake up one day and give back your humanity?” Buffy spoke against his chest, not wanting to look into his eyes.

Angel cupped her chin and made her look at him, “I didn’t regret what I did” Angel finally spoke. When she didn’t reply he continued, “I hated the decision I made but if I were to do it again, I won’t change a thing.”

He waited few beats before adding, “I would never choose anything over your life. Ever. I’d give anything for your life...even my own...if it meant keeping you alive.”

Buffy eyes teared hearing his confession. As much as she was upset over what he did, she understood why he did it. The other part of her also knew that living with those memories was no easy ride for Angel.

“How did you do it? Living with the memories. I don’t know if I could go on knowing what we could...” Buffy finally said.

Angel took a few moments before answering,

“It was hard. At times, it was a painful reminder...of what I could have had...but at times, when I feel like I’m drowning in darkness and when there are days that just gets too hard, the memories become my solace...and when you...when you were...gone...there were times I thought I couldn’t move on...times when I missed you soo much that I thought I couldn’t make it through the night...the memories were all that sustained me.”

Tears began rolling down her cheeks. Angel gently wiped her tears before leading her back to their bed and finished cleaning her wounds.

When he was done, he placed the box of their first-aid supplies away and looked at her. He cupped her face, gently caressing her brow, cheek and lips before leaning forward and began tenderly kissing her neck moving to her shoulders. Buffy closed her eyes, relishing in his warm touch. He felt so different and yet familiar at the same time.

Angel began nipping her cheeks as emotions overwhelmed her and she immediately covered her lips with his, passionately kissing him as fresh tears began rolling down her cheeks.

“I love you”, Buffy said brokenly when they broke the kiss.

Angel gently cupped her face and shook his head, wiping her tears with his thumb.

“I love you too” he replied before moving forward and kissing her again.

Buffy replied his kisses with vigour, suddenly hungry for his loving touch. He lifted her and placed her on his lap. She immediately straddled him. Angel hovered his hands around her body, wanting to touch her soft skin but too afraid that he’ll hurt her. Sensing his hesitation, she broke the kiss and reached for his hands and drew them around her and resting them on her back. He went willingly, his fingers gingerly touching her injured back as she kissed him again and released her hold on his hands to wrap her arms around his broad shoulders. She broke the kiss again, her breath erratic as she took one of his masculine hands and guided them to cup her breast. She covered her hands on top his, guiding his hand to squeeze her breast.

Soon, Angel did it on his own. She stared into his eyes and saw doubt amidst the love he has for her. She kissed him and moaned louder, relishing the feel of his hand on her chest. She took his hand again and this time guided him to her core and pressed his hand in. He broke the kiss and stifled a groan.

She was wet and ready for him. His pants soon melded with hers as he stared lovingly into her beautiful face. “I want you Buffy”, he moaned. She matched his passion and drew him down over her as she laid on the bed. They continued kissing, nipping at each others’ lips, duelling tongues and gripping arms. He felt her hands fumbling with his pants and he helped her. Soon, he was as nude as she was. He broke off the kiss and stared down at her.

She reached up and touched his face, gently stroking his eyes and cheeks. His eyes caught the nasty marks on her wrist, no doubt was caused by the demons. He took both her hands and stared at the bruises as felt his anger rise within. He looked into her eyes and saw the love shining through. “I’m okay”, she said reassuring him, her voice full of tenderness.

He leaned down and kissed her bruised wrists with all the longing in his heart. She pushed his face up to face her and tenderly wiped his tears. “I’m alright”, she reassured him again before drawing him down and kissed him. She plundered her tongue into his mouth and wrapped her arms around his neck drawing him close. She roamed her hands on his broad back, stroking it as if soothing him. She pushed her hips up against his hardening shaft, wanting him to take her, claim her.

Angel broke the kiss and stared at her, feeling his shaft growing harder and he surrendered to her warmth, entering her with extreme gentleness. She hissed at the contact. Angel’s shaft was now warm, pulsating burning her with sensual intensity. She moved her hips up, wanting him deeper into her. Angel gasped as she allowed him to sink into her. He was overwhelmed with emotions as she continued pushing herself up while cupping his rear, pushing him down deeper into her. She started rotating her hips, enticing him to grind her. Angel could feel his desire mounting as he timidly started grinding. She hugged him tighter, wanting him close to her.

He felt himself grew harder as she pushed her hips up. Buffy kissed his neck, suckling it. Growing in confidence, he started thrusting, slow and deep, making love sweetly to her. She moaned his name as she felt herself teetering close to the edge. “Buffy...” he cried as he nuzzled her jaw, relishing in her heat, feeling his release drawing close. She dug her fingers in his back willing him closer as she gently tugged his head to face her. Locking their eyes, she told him, “I love you”. He repeated before lowering his head capturing his lips ravenously, her peak mounting. Angel kissed her with equal fervour as he thrust deeper. Soon, he felt the orgasmic pleasure sweep through his cold form for long endless moments leaving him sated and content. She joined him only moments later crying out his name, shuddering in his arms. He collapsed over her as he waited for reality to return.


“We’re having a baby”, Buffy said once they have calmed their racing hearts.

“Yeah”, Angel said, his hands drawing soothing circles on her back.

“A part of me hates that our baby is some saviour for the Powers”.

“And the other part?”

“And the other part is happy…it’s like everything I’ve ever dreamed of is coming true.”

“You dreamed of having a baby?”

“I dreamed of having a baby with you…I dreamed of a life with you…and now, despite the circumstances we are in, I am happy that things are falling into place”.

Angel tilt her chin up to look into her eyes.

“I dreamed of a life with you too”.

Buffy smiled and leaned up to kiss him. When they broke away, she laid back on his chest.

“Do you believe all that fate stuff they said about us?”

“A part of me does.”

“And the other part?”, she repeated.

“I’m close to 300, Buffy. I’ve lived long enough to know that this fate thing sometimes is not what it seems. I do know this…When we first met, I fell in love with you. You can say that it was fate…maybe it was the Powers that showed you to me…I was given the option to help you or continue to rot in some alley for the rest of my unlife. But I chose to follow you to Sunnydale. I didn’t blindly fall in love with you. I walked into this knowing that our love was forbidden..that it could never be. I know we were from different worlds and yet, I choose to continue loving you. Even when we were apart and I convinced myself that you were better off without me, I still choose to love you. The Powers and fate can take credit for us being together but I know that in any lifetime, in any world, I’ll always choose to love you and fate have nothing to do with that.”

Angel reached down to touch her stomach and continued.

“They told me our baby was conceived to be a saviour for the world. I honestly don’t care how or why he or she was conceived. All this talk about being a damn saviour, I couldn’t care less. All I know is that our love created this beautiful life and that’s it. I’ll do anything in my power to protect him or her with all that I have.”

Buffy smiled through her tears and gave him one final kiss before leaning back down and allowed his newly beating heart to lull her to sleep.

Life was hard for a slayer…at times dangerous…but here in this moment, she was a normal girl lying in the arms of her newly normal boyfriend, their hands were clasped lying still on her belly where their child was…come what may, she will fight for their love, for their baby, for their chance of finally being a family and so will he…life is far from perfect but she decided from this day forth, life will be good.