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~Episode 57 - Taste of Defeat~

"What did you find out from your encounter with the resistance?" Spectra asked after Gus came back. Gus was quite sure he was just being polite, and the hint of curiosity he heard was just his imagination.

"Their newest battle brawler is nothing more than an amateur." Answered Gus, as neutrally as a proper servant should. 'I tried to mess with his mind a little, but he was too dumb to get it,' is what Gus meant to say. But it would sound pathetic if master found out that one of his best skills didn't work.

"Be careful, Gus, don't underestimate Dan Kuso." Did he actually care for Gus? No, impossible. He just hates to lose.

"He is nothing but a child." Gus assured him.

"He may prove to be our greatest opponent." Spectra smirked and Gus immediately knew what he meant by that.

"Then it's also possible that he could prove to be our greatest ally. You and only you can bring our worlds together, I will make them understand."

Spectra turned around and left without answering. Gus had basically just read his mind and gave himself the orders. It was always like this. He always knew what his master wanted and did not hesitate to do anything to fulfil his wishes. He had a special ability to get into someone's mind and twist it to his own liking. It was a big help when Gus defeated their opponent like this before the battle even started. Even though he had a sneaky skill like that, he would never use it on Spectra. When they were together, he was polite, yet honest and straightforward, which Spectra appreciated a lot. Usually, people would never let their guard down in his presence, but Gus did, always and automatically, like it was a completely natural thing to do. Their relationship between them grew a lot stronger as of lately, since their goal seemed to get closer. They had to stick together to prevent any intrusions from both prince Hydron and the Vexos. Spectra decided he will find out what his relationship with Gus is, so he tried to sum up his feelings towards him as he headed for the bathroom. He knew Gus will take his time to slowly and painfully crush the resistance while taking control over their minds, and he decided to enjoy a bath in the meantime.

'Gus is a good friend of mine,' thought Spectra and took of his mask and coat, folding it carefully on an elegant pile along with other parts of his uniform. But this description was not really accurate.

'I like being with him.' No. Still not enough.

'I like him.' No. There was something else. Something that made his heart race every time he saw him.

He dove into the hot water. He has to solve this mystery. He relaxed his body and tried to think. There was more to it, for sure. Spectra knew the right word, and he would never admit it to himself, but he was afraid of it. The word was heavy and serious, like a thick chain binding you to a huge rock. On Vestal, there was only one rule for a relationship like that: Do or do not, there is no try. It is not like this was a law or something, it was just that vestals valued this kind of relationship a lot, and they knew that if they feel like this towards someone, either they will be forever with that person or forever alone. It was a normal thing no one has ever questioned, because it just felt natural to them.

"I love him," whispered Spectra. The words fell out of his mouth like a boulder. No. That is ridiculous. A man could never have this feeling towards another man. Impossible. His brain must have boiled in the hot water and now it stopped working. A proper Vestal would never think about a love relationship other than that between a man and a woman (and that may be one of the reasons for the overpopulation they have). But deep inside, he knew it was love all along.

Spectra reached for his towel. Naming his feelings did not help at all, since he had no idea how to deal with them. He almost smashed the mirror with his head in attempt to relieve the frustration. He was angry. At himself. For falling in love. And as if it wasn't bad enough, with a man. And there was no way back.

He got dressed and headed back to the main hall. His gauntlet reported that Gus has returned. Spectra hid his panic and feelings under his mask.

"I have brought you victory, my master, as promised." Announced Gus as he knelt before Spectra. Did he just seriously say 'my master'? That must have sounded awfully weird. Why did he say that?!

"Well done, Gus. You have brought pride back to the Vexos." The others were making stupid comments out of envy, but Gus didn't care. All that he was interested in was that warm feeling around his heart as his master praised him. What was that?