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To Have Faith

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Gavin woke slowly from a dreamy haze. His head was pounding (fuck how much did he drink last night-) and his entire body ached with exhaustion. Tilting his head up, he hesitantly opened his eyes only to shut them immediately in an effort to curb the burning sensation. After a few moments, he took a deep breath and cracked his eyes opened again, taking in his surroundings. A block of wood stood in front of his face. (The headboard to his bed. Right.) He was in bed, which also explained the pillows. He felt the warmth of several blankets were draped over his body, weighing him down further. The curtains were drawn shut but there was still some light filtering through which meant it was sometime during the day.

Gavin groaned, head falling back on the bed. Fowler was going to have his ass for playing hooky. What had he been doing the last night? He didn't remember coming home. But did he really go to a bar when the precinct was so overworked? No. He couldn’t have. He was an asshole, but he wasn't that dumb asshole that got blackout drunk when people needed him. He also couldn't have gone to the bar since his headache would be much, much worse and he would be bruised beyond belief from fights.

Had he been... working a case? Gavin tried to concentrate in the last thing he remembered. Flashes of a crime scene filled with copious amounts of drugs filtered through his vision. That’s right. The last thing he remembered doing was solving a case with Richard when-

Oh shit. Richard had gotten gunned down with silver bullets by one of the red ice dealers that they had tracked down. Although he eventually managed to subdue his attackers, the vampire had been losing blood and losing it fast. In a split second (and not very well thought-out) decision, Gavin without hesitation offered his blood to Richard who had not wasted any time sinking his teeth into the sensitive region of Gavin’s neck.

He groaned, shivering in fear as a fresh shot of adrenaline coursed through his body. No wonder he couldn't remember much. He probably passed out in fear as Richard drained the blood from his body. Even though he had warmed up to Richard over the years that they had been working together, his past experiences with vampires prevented him from trusting his partner completely.

His eyes widened as the reality of the situation kicked in. He was lying in bed unable to defend himself. Richard (since anyone else would have taken him to the hospital) likely would still be in the house since the bastard had no concept of personal space. Gavin felt panic rise within his stomach, his breaths becoming more rapid.

“Gavin?” A voice called so softly that it could be considered meek. Speaking of the devil. Gavin froze completely, blood rushing through his ears. He felt his breathing stop as his mind screamed for him to get away.

“...I'll… make my leave. I only seem to be causing you distress,” Richard said after a moment of tense silence, backing away. It hurt Gavin to hear the distress in his voice. He took a deep and shaky breath, willing the voice in his head to shut up.

“Wait.” Gavin croaked out, his voice hoarse and shaky. God he hated how weak he was and the lack of control he had over his own body. “Don't leave. Stay.”

“You're terrified of me, detective. Your heart rate is accelerated and adrenaline is coming off you in waves,” Richard said. “Your body needs rest. My presence is only going to be more detrimental to your-”

“Shut up!” Gavin snarled, his head pounding with a migraine. His anger quickly dissipated when he realized that appearing angry would not be the best approach. “Just… come here, alright? And for God’s sake call me Gavin.”

“But…” Richard started, trailing off. Gavin couldn't see him, but he knew that the vampire was searching for the right words. He sighed.

“Please Richard. Just trust me please,” He said, echoing Richard's own words from earlier.

(Gavin groaned, grasping his head. When his vision cleared, he glanced up to see Richard clasping handcuffs around the perpetrators, blood flowing down his wrists. Gavin followed the blood, spotting at least three bullet wounds. If Richard had been injured by the bullets…

They had to have been silver bullets. Shit.

Gavin stood up and stumbled over to his partner, watching how he struggled to stand up. Richard turned back to him. Once they stood across from each other, Gavin tilted his head to the side instinctively, exposing his neck. He didn’t miss how Richard’s pupils dilated. Nor did he miss how his partner tried to back away, resisting temptation.

“Just do it, asshole! I won’t let you die because of some stupid perp,” Gavin growled. That’s all it took before Richard all but lunged at him, grasping his head roughly.

“Trust me, Gavin. I will not kill you.”)

Gavin could hear Richard contemplating whether or not to comply. After a few tense moments (Damn his head), Gavin heard footsteps approach the bedside. A weight dipped down to his left, Richard's torso landing firmly against his calf. The touch was strangely... comforting. Gavin willed himself to not look too much into that particular train of thought.

Steeling himself, Gavin spoke. “Look… there… I used to hate vampires. A lot. My parents were killed by vampires, leaving me to grow up as an orphan.”

“Gavin…” Richard murmured. Gavin didn't need to even glance in his direction to know that his partner was deep in thought.

“Not that is really matters. I found out much later that they were druggies, you know? So I would've been fucked either way. But.. yeah. And I was assaulted by one in my late teens. Almost lost all of my blood to that fucker. Almost died, too. I guess you could say that my experiences…” Gavin trailed off, finding it hard to think.

“Were not pleasant?” Richard guessed, running a hand along the dip in his back. Gavin nodded and grasped the sheets tightly.

“When I found out that I was assigned to you, I was livid. I had almost died because of a vampire and now I had to work with one,” Gavin took a deep breath. He felt strangely… comfortable at the moment. He might as well explain it all. “But you proved me wrong. So many times. You risked your life. You took bullets for me. You took silver bullets. For me. That… that…” Gavin said, his voice choking up. Goddamnit.

“You don't have to say anymore,” Richard said softly, his voice reassuring and full of an emotion Gavin didn't want to think about.

You would have died. If I hadn’t... ” Gavin admitted softly, curling his arms around his body as he shuddered. It really hurt to think at this point but he needed to reassure his partner (although he could not figure out why it was so important). “That's why… saving me meant something. 's why you mean something. I’m… terrified of being in that same situation again. On the brink of death and unable to defend myself. I hate feeling so helpless. That’s why I’m tense. I don’t hate you or anything, dipshit. It’s just that… I’m defenseless. And that bothers me.”

The room was quiet for several moments. Gavin wanted to clarify his points more (because Richard could spin anything into a polar opposite direction when he wanted to) but a fresh wave of exhaustion engulfed Gavin's body as the adrenaline wore off. He couldn't fight the urge to close his eyes. Before he could drift off, however, he felt a cold hand lightly intertwine itself with his own, a silent ‘thank you’ that spoke more than words ever could. Gavin smiled and lightly squeezed his partner’s hand, allowing himself to fall back asleep, content and comfortable. Maybe this wasn't so bad, after all.