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How Much Worst Can It Get

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Now, I most likely, sound crazy, and trust me I think I’m crazy too! Now my day started normally like normal for a geek, you know wake up, fall back to sleep and wake up an hour later. Anyways, my day was typical. I woke up at 8:00 am to the sound of “I Don’t Want to Set the World on Fire” by The Ink Spots, the alarm on my phone. I then proceed to fall back to sleep for another 15 minutes because I’m always tired no matter what I do, I go to bed at 8 pm only to be up at like 10 and still super tired. Anyways, I did get out of bed at some point before I had to get up to catch the bus. Took a much-needed shower to wake me up entirely, and I got dressed and headed out the door with my backpack filled with my class books and all the things. Said goodbye to the dogs, locked the door and started walking to the bus stop a block away.

I live with my parents, mostly because I’m a broke college stupid and I don’t have money to live on my own. That and I just turned 18, and I’m still too “baby like” for my mother to let go of just yet. I also live with my dogs, or should I say my parents and brothers’ dog. I don’t have a dog anymore, but that is beside the point. The point is that we trust my dogs enough to leave them alone in a house for about 5 hours, give or take. I’m rambling, sorry. I’ve never exactly been good at explaining things. Maybe I went too far back to how this whole thing started. Okay so like, it happened on the bus, this whole mess of a thing, not that I’m complaining or anything.

So, I was on the bus, like fresh on the bus just swiped my card and everything. Just as I was about sit down and get all uncomfortable with my 45-minute bus ride to my college, out of fucking nowhere, some crazy chick with a box cutter attacked me! Like what the fuck did I do? I couldn’t defend myself against the first swipe of the box cutter. It sliced through my cheek, near my ear to my nose as she went back in for another cut I was able to cover my face fully as the other people on the bus got the knife out of her hand and pinned her hands behind her back. Here’s the thing about head wounds, they bleed. A lot. Now I wouldn’t say I’m squeamish, but I didn’t eat breakfast, so I was already off to a bad start but, I don’t know man, just seeing my blood all over my hands and feeling it pout down my face maybe me a lot more nausea and dizzy. No matter what happened, I must have had a lot of blood loss for me to pass out. One minute some crazy person cuts my face, the next I feel like I’m being squashed and squeezed into a paper tube or something.

When I, shockingly, did wake up it was not in a hospital bed, not on the bus or in an ambulance, and I was on a rocky ground waking to a loud sound, I’m not sure how to explain it, like a weird metallic blast or something. My first thought was, they fucking left me here to bleed all over the place, what the hell is wrong with them. I hadn’t even opened my eyes yet. As I started to pull myself off the ground and slowly open my eyes, I’m pretty sure I almost blacked the fuck out or something.

I was in a weird twisted place with a bunch of sharp rocks and green stuff everywhere. I didn’t notice where I was at. First, I did, however, see the weird-ass, twisted, creepy as walking butterflies that made creepy ass clicking noises start to chase me. I almost like full on cried as I ran. I ran to this weird like rock thing with a weird lady on it, and I grabbed her hand and then I passed out again. I don’t know what the hell is going on, but this is a creepy ass dream. This whole day must be a dream, like no joke.

When I did for who knows how long wake up again, my hands were shackled in this weird medieval sex dungeon, and it looked way, way too familiar. It was even more familiar when the people were guarding me… Well, they weren’t guarding me, not with those swords pointing at me like I was about to jump up and start like headbutting people, like what did they think I was gonna do. I’m in metal shackles, isn’t it like overkill or something?  I don’t know what was going through their heads, but I know what’s going through mine, and boy did I was to stick my tongue out at them and like blow a raspberry, like a kid or some shit.

 I’m half shocked, and half pissed off because I know where I am, but I know it’s not possible, as this is going through my head the door slams open, and you’ll never guess who walks in. If you guessed a pissed off Cassandra Pentaghast and a calm looking, but I knew better, Leliana. I feel like I’m going to cry if it’s out of happiness or being scared the fuck out of my mind because seeing a pissed off Cassandra on a computer screen is so very different then seeing her in person.

I feel like she wanted to grab my neck and shake me as she screamed bloody murder at me and I did not want my poor little neck to be squeezed by someone who could probably grab said neck and rip my throat out. I wasn’t paying attention to the two of them for a good second, so I missed out on what she said, but I knew what she said.

“Explain this.” Cassandra all but demanded. It was not a question.

“I don’t know” I mean I did know, but she doesn’t have to know that, until I know what the hell I’m doing here, I’m going to stick to the dialogue options.

 “What do you mean you don’t know!”

“I mean I don’t know!” I yelped when she slammed her hands down on my shoulders. Man, she is pissed off. Thankfully Leliana grabbed Cassandra by the arm and pulled her away before she probably could hit me.

“We need him, Cassandra,” Leliana spoke as she like in the video game turned back at me, though I most definitely knew she was not happy with me, and she probably wants to pick my eyes out and feed them to her birds.

“I don’t know what’s going on…” I started, and this isn’t a lie on my part because like I’ve said, I have no fucking clue.

“Do you remember what happened? How this began.” I already know what to say, but I always felt that the original line was weird, so.

“… I remember waking up in a weird place, running away from these things…” I wiggled my nose slightly mostly because they pair were drilling holes into my head and I already knew what Cassandra was going to say. “… And then this woman, glowing, reached out to me and…” taking a deep breath hoping that I could make it seem like I was, I don’t know  remembering or in shock.

“A woman?”

“…She reached out to me and I took her hand… the next thing I remember is waking up in this weird sex dungeon” I started down at my hands in shock at what I said and in humiliation because I just said sex dungeon to two of the three scariest women you can know in Dragon Age: Inquisition.