Sherlock sat next to Eurus' cell back in Sherrinford. He had just placed his violin back in its case and was now conversing with his sister. He now visited her once a week, Sherlock was finding that he actually enjoyed his weekly visits to Eurus. He wished that things were different in his childhood but if they had been he may not have met John but at the same time Victor may have been still alive... Who knew really? On this day though, something felt different but Sherlock couldn't quite put his finger on it.
Eurus watched Sherlock with a curious eye. There was something wrong with him. She studied him from behind, from behind the glass, Eurus tried to catch a glimpse of his face and straight away she just knew that he was... sad... confused... Why?
"What's wrong with you Sherlock?"
Sherlock looked up at Eurus with bewilderment in his blue eyes. "What do you mean? There's nothing wrong with me."
She stood and looked at him. They studied each other and looked into one another's eyes.
"Yes, there is. It's clear as day."
"The day is never clear."
She sighed and rolled her eyes at her brother. "No need to be a smartarse." She turned away from him. "What I mean is, there's something on your mind. Something is troubling you."
"I don't understand what you mean. I'm fine. Seriously."
Eurus was silent for a moment and regained her full posture. "That's the thing. When people say they're fine they're not. They never are. That's life's biggest lie. People who say 'I'm fine' aren't." She turned back around and placed a hand on the glass blocking her from the outside world.
"They're never fine but you know what? That's okay."
Sherlock contemplated Eurus' words. He knew that deep down he wasn't fine but the thing was he had no idea what was wrong. No idea whatsoever. There was something in the back of his head. Lurking in the depths of forgotten memories but it felt different. It was like he hadn't deleted it but the memories had deleted themselves.
"There's something wrong... with my mind Eurus. It's like memories that aren't supposed to be there are gone. It's like I'm trying to remember events that I don't believe ever happened, at least not to me." Sherlock placed his hand on hers, only the glass separating them. It's strange that something like glass can separate things and people.
"There's nothing wrong with you Sherlock..." She smiled softly. "I mean, come on. You helped me... to know who I truly am. To help me feel like I belong in the world. I am not alone anymore because of you. If it wasn't for you..." A tear fell from her eye. "I'd be alone forever."
Sherlock didn't believe in fate but he did believe that there was no such thing as coincidence. For the rest of his visit, he listened to Eurus talk about whatever was on her mind. It felt strange coming to Sherrinford, a sense of familiarity. It was as though Sherrinford was like a place he had been in a dream but dreams weren't reality.
When it was time to leave Eurus, they placed their hands on the glass and looked to the floor. No words were parted but there was no need for words. The silence was their words to each other. Sherlock walked to the elevator door and the siblings looked at each other one last time. It would be another week before they laid eyes on each other again. Sherlock felt deeply saddened by this but he knew it wouldn't be long before he saw his little sister again.
It was just one week.
Arriving back at Baker Street, there was a strange silence which made Sherlock feel cautious as he entered his home. Although John and he had made up, John hadn't properly apologized for beating him half to death, Sherlock didn't mind really he just enjoyed having John and Rosie back in 221B. They were in the living room when Sherlock walked up the stairs and through the door. Rosie was playing on the floor and John was sitting on his armchair, drinking a cup of tea. Sherlock felt uneasy walking into the room but he felt a sense of happiness well up inside him at the sight of his goddaughter playing on the ground. Rosie was laughing to herself and she was playing with the building blocks that Mrs Hudson had bought for her.
John didn't look up from the newspaper, he hadn't noticed that Sherlock was in the room until Sherlock was taking his coat off.
"Oh, Sherlock, sorry didn't notice you came in. How was Eurus?" John still felt uncomfortable knowing that she was still in the picture.
Sherlock nodded, "Yes, she's fine, not planning any schemes which is you know, good." He took his signature scarf off and placed it on the hook, on top of his coat. "How are you and Rosie?"
"Yeah, we're good. Didn't get up to much, Rosie's just been playing most of the day."
Sherlock smiled and took a seat opposite John and Rosie. He blinked and didn't see Rosie but a little baby on the floor with black hair and pale skin. Blinking again, Rosie. He swallowed. A wave of dizziness overcame him and he closed his eyes. John noticed that something was not right.
Sherlock nodded, "Yes, I'm fine." He wasn't.
He rose to his feet, "I think I'm going to lie down for a while..."
John's eyebrows knitted together in confusion but he nodded and watched as his friend stumbled down the hallway and slip into his room...