Actions

Work Header

Online Fun

Chapter Text

All Might created a new group called Smash Brothers!

All Might added Eraserhead, Present Mic, Snipe, Powerloader, Ingenium, Cementoss, and Blood King

All Might: Hey guys!

Eraserhead: What’s up? I was taking a nap and got a notification from my phone.

Present Mic: You started an online chat? Cool!

Snipe: Why is it called Smash Brothers?

All Might: I thought it was a perfect name for our group!

Eraserhead: Don’t tell me…

All Might: That’s right! In this group, we’re talking about smashing!

Cementoss: Smashing…..what?

All Might: Bitches, of course!

Eraserhead: I don’t ‘Smash bitches’, All Might.

Present Mic: Yeah, me neither.

Cementoss: I haven’t done that in years. Never have time.

Snipe: Me too.

Ingenium: I have a lot of fans, but…..

Blood King: I can’t even get a girl to go out with me…..

Powerloader: Same……

All Might:……

Eraserhead:……

Present Mic:……..

All Might: You guys are no fun!

——————-

All Might: So last night, I found a hot one and smashed her.

Snipe: What was her name?

All Might: Hm….I forgot lol

Eraserhead: Figures….

All Might: By the way, Eraser, you said you don’t smash bitches, but didn’t you say you loved pussy?

Eraserhead: Wait, what?

Present Mic: LOL Shota you said that?!

Snipe: I can’t believe it.

Cementoss: Lol

Powerloader: That’s out of character.

All Might: That’s what I heard.

Erasehead: Um…..I think I said it before, but I didn’t mean pussy like women….

All Might: Then, what did you mean?

Eraserhead: I meant cats.

Cementoss: You're into bestiality?

Eraserhead: Hell no!

All Might: Its okay, we won't judge.

Eraserhead: I love cats, but not like that!

Cementoss: Cats are really cute.

Powerloader: Yeah, they are.

All Might: Not gonna lie, I’d smash one of those catgirls.

Ingenium: Catgirls?

All Might: You know, those type of girls from the "good" sites.

Powerloader: Oh, yeah….they're pretty hot.

Present Mic: Not really my style, but Shota definitely loves it!

Eraserhead (blushing): I do not….

All Might: Its alright Eraser, we know you love pussy, whether its cats or girls.

Eraserhead:….

————

Chapter Text

All Might added Endeavor to the group

Eraserhead and Mic: Oh god no…..

Cementoss: Shit…

Ingenium: Oh no….

Blood King(smiling): Time for some fuckery. I’ll get the popcorn.

Snipe: All Might, why have you betrayed us?

Endeavour: What’s up bitches?

All Might: Hello, Endeavour.

Endeavour: I see the faggots are on here.

Ingenium: ???

Eraserhead: Firehead is talking about me and Mic.

Mic: He thinks we’re a couple.

Endeavor: You aren’t???

Eraserhead: NO

Endeavor: Whatever, you still a faggot.

Eraserhead: And your still an asshole.

Mic: You’re just mad he has a best friend like me.

Endeavor: I’d rather die than have a cockatoo as a friend.

Mic:…..

Eraserhead: lol you’d probably burn him like you did your son.

Endeavor: Dumbass, I didn’t do that!

Eraserhead: Oh yeah? Then who did?

Endeavor: His worthless mother poured boiling water on him.

Eraserhead: Poor kid, he has two abusive parents…

Endeavor: At least I have a wife and kids, unlike you faggot.

Eraserhead: At least I don’t beat women and children.

Blood King: Okay, I just got my popcorn! Any roasts yet?

All Might: A few of them, but its just starting to get good!

Eraserhead: All Might, you could ban this motherfucker at any point in time.

All Might: Uh…don’t plan on doing that.

Endeavor: What’s the matter, fag? You can’t handle a little criticism?

Eraserhead: Whatever jackass.

Endeavor: Women love jackasses, which is why I’m married, and you can’t even get laid.

Mic: Actually, Eraser is really popular with a lot of women.

Endeavor: Yeah right! I bet most of them are just babies from his high school! They don’t count!

Eraserhead: You know, I went to your house the other day….

Endeavor: Eh?

Eraserhead: Your daughter really wanted my D js

Endeavor: You lying fucker!

All Might: Not gonna lie, but when we visited your house she was giving him the ‘I want his D’ face.

Cementoss: DAAAAAAMN

Powerloader: Lol

Snipe: Your own daughter likes your enemy

Endeavor: Man, fuck y’all…

Endeavor left the chat

------------------

Chapter Text

All Might: Guys, it has come to my attention that one of us has a girlfriend.

Snipe: Nice.

All Might: And, she’s a student at UA.

Cementoss: Okay. So?

Ingenium: WTF? Who’s dating one of the students?

Endeavor: Probably the faggot.

Eraserhead: Whatever dipshit.

Mic:……

Blood King: I heard about that. I think it’s a student from your class, Eraser.

All Might: Seriously? Well, we have to tell Nezu and get his pedo off campus!

Eraserhead: I don’t really care. Besides, Nezu doesn’t either.

Blood King: How do you know that?

Eraserhead: I asked him.

Mic:………

Eraserhead: Mic, if you have something to say, just say it!

Mic:……

Eraserhead: Whatever….

Snipe: It's not like Mic to stay quiet like this. What happened to him?

Endeavor: He probably had a fight with his boyfriend.

Eraserhead: Dumbass, we aren’t a couple!

All Might: Guys, we need to stay focused! We got to find this pedo!

Eraserhead: Or, we could mind our own business and let students date whoever they want.

Ingenium: That’s a pretty fucked up thing to say, especially for you Eraser…

Cementoss: I agree with Eraser. We shouldn’t assume the guy is a criminal for just dating one of the students. They could have a consensual relationship.

Mic: There’s no ‘consensual relationship’ when your dating a minor, regardless of the age of consent.

Eraserhead: Mic…..

Mic: Its wrong, beyond wrong…..

Eraserhead: I….thought you would understand….

==========

Blood King: Wait, then…

All Might: Wait, you’re the pedo?!

Endeavor: From a faggot to a pedo lol

Mic: How could I ever understand? You had plenty of other women to choose from, so why her?

Eraserhead: It's illogical, but I can't change who I love.

All Might: Eraser, a Smash brother doesn’t smash kids.

Eraserhead: She’s 16, only 2 years from being a full, legal adult. She’s anything but a child. Hell, we haven’t even kissed yet…

Snipe: Still, I never thought you would date one of your own students.

Ingenium: Who is she anyway?

Eraserhead: Shinobu. You remember her, Ingenium?

Ingenium: But didn’t you adopt her?

Eraserhead: Technically, yes, but it was never official.

All Might: So, you’re dating not only one of your students, but a girl you adopted?

Eraserhead: Yes....

Mic: Do you realize now how messed up that is?

Eraserhead: I can’t make excuses, but again, I love who I love.

Cementoss: She’s not related to you, so it's not all bad.

Snipe: Yeah, but….

Endeavor: She’s still under the age of 18.

All Might: Yeah…..

Blood King: And your student. What the hell, dude?

Eraserhead:……..

============

Chapter Text

All Might: Okay, I still don’t approve, but just for my sanity and to make sure she's safe...

Eraserhead:……

All Might: Eraser,……you smashed yet?

Eraserhead: Hell no.

All Might: Okay then! From now on, this will be my stick!

Snipe: And, what if he says yes?

Endeavor: We’re calling the police. Duh!

Eraserhead: The age of consent is 16. Plus, it's her word over all of yours, so I won’t get into legal trouble.

Mic:……..

Eraserhead: Mic, will you get over it already? I’m not hurting her!

Mic: I still don’t approve.

Endeavor: Okay, I don’t like him dating one his students, but as long as he doesn’t touch her, its fine! Plus, its his fucking life, not yours!

Mic:……

Endeavor: I thought y’all were friends?

Mic: I’m not friends with pedophiles.

All Might:…..Mic, we just went over that Eraser isn’t a pedo.

Mic: It's weird. One minute your calling him a pedo, and the next your okay with this.

All Might: Yeah, I am. If he didn’t smash, he’s not really doing anything wrong. Plus, how long have y’all been dating?

Eraserhead: A month.

All Might: You’ve been with a girl for that long without smashing her?

Eraserhead: She blushes like a tomato if I hold her hand. Bet if I even proposed doing that, she'd faint.

Cementoss: That’s.....kind of adorable.

Snipe: Yeah….

Blood King: Makes me kind of jealous.

Endeavor: And now you're a faggot again.

Eraserhead: Whatever, child abuser.

Endeavor:……..

=============

All Might added Eraserfan to the group

Eraserfan: Hey guys!

Cementoss: Hello

Snipe: Hi!

Ingenium: What’s up?

Mic:…….

Eraserfan: Mic, its been a while!

Mic:…..

Eraserfan: I’m sorry I never told you about our relationship.

Mic: No, its fine.

Eraserfan:…..

Eraserhead: Don’t worry, he’ll get over it eventually.

Mic leaves the chat

Endeavor: So, this is your girlfriend?

Eraserhead: Yep.

All Might: I figured that we let her on just to make sure Eraser doesn’t try anything.

Eraserhead: I told you we haven’t even kissed.

Eraserfan: (blushing) I appreciate your concern, guys, but Mr. Aizawa is a great boyfriend!

Cementoss: He better be.

Snipe: Yeah.

Blood King: So, what do you guys do?

Eraserfan: Sometimes we go out, but Aizawa is pretty busy.

Eraserhead: With my work as a teacher in the morning and my night shifts as a hero, I don’t even get enough time for sleep.

Endeavor: lol loser.

Eraserfan: Endeavor, don’t be mean! He works extremely hard!

All Might: Don’t worry, kid. Endeavor’s always a jerk.

Eraserhead: Yeah

Snipe: Pretty much

Cementoss: Yep.

Blood King: Definitely

Endeavor: Puss ass motherfuckers.

All Might: Endeavor! Language!

Eraserfan: Don’t worry sensei! He's not as bad as Bakugou!

Eraserhead: He does curse a lot, and his parents don’t seem to mind either.

All Might: Good thing my mentee doesn’t curse like that.

Eraserfan: Izuku?

All Might: Yeah, you friends with him?

Eraserfan: Definitely! He’s really nice, and we spend some time together.

Eraserhead: How much time?

Eraserfan: A few times a week. Ochako and Tenya are with us too!

Cementoss: Its good your making friends.

Eraserhead: Just don’t get too friendly. Midoriya may be nice, but he’s still a horny teenaged boy.

All Might: Eraser, believe me, he’s too much of a….nerd….to actually do anything.

Eraserhead: I know, but I’m still going to threaten him just to be sure.

Eraserfan: Huh? You don’t know?

All Might: Know what?

Eraserfan: Him and Ochako are together.

Everyone but Eraserfan: WHAT?!

===============

Chapter Text

All Might added Izuku Midoriya to the group

Mic: Why did you add him?

All Might: He has a girlfriend now, so he’s an official smash brother.

Mic:….

Eraserhead: Mic……I'm sorry….

Mic: Just drop it. I’m over it now.

Endeavor: Finally, the fags made up.

Eraserhead: Speaking of made up, your wife outta the hospital yet?

Endeavor: Nah, faggot.

Eraserhead: Figures…..

All Might: Anyway, Eraser….

Eraserhead: ???

All Might: You smashed?

Eraserhead: Nope.

Mic: Better not.

Eraserhead: I thought you were over it.

Mic: I am, but that doesn’t mean I approve.

All Might: Don’t worry, Mic! Shinobu is really happy with him!

Endeavor: Any girl would be happy with a pedo giving her candy.

Eraserhead: Shut up motherfucker.

Endeavor: Oooooooh…..I pissed off the fag lol

All Might: You know what’s weird?

Mic: What?

All Might: Endeavor, you only call Eraser a faggot. Why is that?

Mic: That’s true. You leave me alone for the most part.

Endeavor: I just like making the faggot angry. Plus, he looks like a girl from behind.

Eraserhead: And you look like a villain, but you don’t hear me bitching about it.

Endeavor: Whatever, faggot.

All Might: And you stood up for him before.

Endeavor: When the fuck did I do that?

All Might: Like, two chats ago. You went off on Mic, remember?

Endeavor: Yeah, cause I fucking felt like it.

All Might:……

--------------

Chapter Text

All Might: I have a problem.

Eraserhead: What?

Mic: Is it Izuku again?

All Might: Well…kind of….

Eraserhead: What did Problem Child do this time?

All Might: Nothing. I went to his place yesterday and spoke with his mom.

Mic: So, normal stuff?

All Might: Well..not gonna lie, but I had a dream about his mom.

Eraserhead: Really?

All Might: Yeah, I was smashing the fuck outta her.

Mic: Eww…..isn’t she really fat?

Eraserhead: Eh, she’s a bit chubby, but she has a cute face.

All Might: ikr. You wanna smash her too, Eraser?

Eraserhead: Hell no, I don’t wanna be problem child’s step father. Plus, I like smaller women.

Mic: More like children…

Eraserhead:…..Fuck you, Mic.

All Might: Mic, I thought you were over this. Stop being a dick.

Mic: Im just sayin. Shota should stop bringing it up.

Eraserhead: How about you get off my dick and stop bitching about it???

Endeavor: Morning, dumbasses. The fags are at it again I see.

Eraserhead: Fuck off.

Endeavor: Damn, who pissed in your cat bowl this morning?

All Might: lol he’s not a cat Endeavor.

Endeavor: He looks like one…

Mic: lol

Endeavor: Shut up you oversized microphone.

Eraserhead: LMAO

All Might: LOL

Mic: Y’all some dicks frfr

All Might: Anyway, I really wanna smash Izuku’s mom though. Eraser, you got her number?

Eraserhead: Why the fuck would I have her number?

All Might: You’re Young Midoriya’s homeroom teacher! Don’t you have a list of all the parents' phone numbers?

Eraserhead: Oh, yeah probably.

Endeavor: Don’t got my phone number.

Eraserhead: No, but I got your daughter’s number, bitch.

All Might: Oooooh, treated.

Mic: lol

Endeavor: (sends a picture of himself flipping the bird)

Eraserhead: (sends the same thing) Right back at ya

All Might: Eraser, I’m telling your girl about that phone number lol

Mic:…….

Eraserhead: If you tell, then I’m showing problem child this chat.

All Might:..................Okay man, I won’t snitch.
==========

Chapter Text

Izuku:………….

All Might: Hello, Young Midoriya!

Eraserhead: What’s up, problem child?

Mic: Hello, listener!

Izuku: OMG I don’t want to be in this group…

All Might: What? Why?!

Izuku: I looked at all the previous chats…

Eraserhead: Oh….shit….

Endeavor: It was at this moment that the pedophile knew: he fucked up.

Eraserhead: Problem child, don’t listen to this fuck! I am NOT a pedophile!

Izuku: Oh, you mean about you and Shinobu? I already knew about that.

Eraserhead: Who told you!?

Izuku: No one did. I already knew.

Eraserhead:………..

Mic:……..

Izuku: But that’s not my problem. All Might…

All Might: Shit….

Izuku: You….wanna screw my mom???

All Might: Um….

Eraserhead: lol

Mic: lol

Endeavor: lol

Blood King: You wanna smash his mom?

Cementoss: I believe it.

Snipe: God damn All Might.

Ingenium: That’s just messed up…..

All Might: Young Midoriya, I am just a man. And, as a man, I like to smash. So, all I have to say is this….

Everyone:………..

All Might: I would like to plow your mom.

Everyone but Izuku and All Might: WTF????

Izuku:…………………………

All Might: I know you have a father, but I haven’t seen him around, so…..

Izuku: All Might, my mom’s married.

All Might: Wait, what?

Izuku: My dad works overseas and hasn't been around for years, but he's still married to my mom. Sorry, All Might….

Mic: Damn!

Eraserhead: LOL rejected

Endeavor: LMAO

Blood King: Let me get my violin

Cementoss: Sucks to be you lol

Snipe: Dang….

All Might:………………

Izuku: All Might, are you okay?

All Might: Yeah, just….dying inside…..
==================

Chapter Text

All Might: Young Midoriya, I hear that you're dating young Uraraka.

Izuku: Yeah.

Eraserfan: They’re soooooo cute together!

Izuku: (blushing)

Eraserhead: Kid, what are doing on here? I thought you were still at school.

Eraserfan: I just left and I’m getting ice cream with Uraraka.

Izuku: Really?

Eraserhead: You should have asked me first. I was getting worried.

Eraserfan: Sorry!

Eraserhead: (sighing) Its okay, just make it home safely.

Endeavor: Aw….

Mic:…………

Izuku: I feel a lot of tension in this chat.

Endeavor: Thanks, Captain Obvious.

Cementoss: Yeah, ever since Eraser and Shinobu got together, Mic’s been hatin

Snipe: Yeah, its kind of sad.

Mic: I’m not hating! I just don’t approve of their relationship!

Eraserfan: Mic……

Eraserhead: Not this again.

Mic: Joke is still sulking, you know…

Eraserfan: Ms. Joke?

Eraserhead: Mic, that’s none of your business.

Mic: You broke her heart.

Everyone but Mic: !

Eraserhead: She confessed to me and I turned her down. It's as simple as that.

Eraserfan: Why didn’t you tell me?

Eraserhead: You…….didn’t need to know……

Eraserfan:……….

Mic:…………..

Izuku: Oh no…..

All Might:…………..
================

All Might: Mic and Shinobu haven’t been on the chat for days. Eraser, have you spoken to them?

Eraserhead: No…..

Endeavor: Why the hell is your girl so upset, anyway? So a girl confessed to you if you turned her down…

Snipe: Not always that simple.

Cementoss: Keeping secrets in a relationship leads to trust issues.

Eraserhead: Even if I had told her, she would be upset…

Blood King: Yeah. Hate to break it to you, but young girls these days are really insecure.

Endeavor: That girl is on some bs. Eraser, you need to talk to her!

Eraserhead: Why the hell do you care?

All Might: I agree with Endeavor. I’m sick of this drama between you and Mic as well.

Eraserhead:………
--------------------------

Chapter Text

All Might: So, how did it go?

Eraserhead:………

Endeavor:………

Cementoss: Not well, then?

Snipe: What happened?

Eraserhead:…..It's all my fault.

Izuku: I could talk to Shinobu.

Eraserhead: Problem child, don’t get involved.

Endeavor: But, what happened?

Eraserhead: You guys really want to know?

Everyone: YES

Eraserhead: I tried talking with Mic, and he went off on me. He was angry at me for dating Shinobu, but he was also in love with Joke.

All Might: He loved Joke? But, didn’t she love you?

Eraserhead: Yeah, and she still does.

Endeavor: So, why is he mad at you?

Eraserhead: Joke took my rejection pretty hard, so she won’t come out of her room. As a friend, I should have noticed.

All Might: But, wouldn’t that just make it worse?

Eraserhead: I thought so, but Mic didn’t feel the same way. He couldn’t stand seeing her suffer anymore, so he finally went off on me. He believed that I was such an awful friend, I would just break Shinobu’s heart as well. Not only that, but I was dating my own student and all...

Cementoss: Not to insult you or anything, but your not the type to notice stuff like that, so why would Mic get so angry?

All Might: He’s blindly in love.

Snipe: So, hoes before bros?

All Might: Basically.

Izuku: So, what happened with Shinobu?

Eraserhead: I told her about Joke, and broke up with her.

Everyone: WHAT?!

Eraserhead: Our relationship was never a good idea, and I knew it. The kid has to focus on her schoolwork. I’m her teacher and guardian, nothing more than that.

All Might: Eraser, you just made it 5,000 times worse.

Endeavor: So, your friend went off on you cause he’s a beta in love with a chick who can’t get over you, and you break up with a girl who did nothing wrong cause you're that much of an asshole. At the same time, you feel bad for being an asshole?

All Might: Basically.

Cementoss: Yeah

Snipe: Totally.

Eraserhead: What else was I supposed to do?

Endeavor: Faggot, did you actually love her or not?

Eraserhead:……..

Izuku: Teacher…..

Snipe:……..

Izuku: Shinobu told me how happy she was with you. I know its not my business, but…..I think you should tell her how you really feel.

All Might: Young Midoriya….

Izuku: I know your not the type of person to express your feelings, but you have to try. She won't know how you really feel unless you tell her.

Eraserhead: Problem child….thanks

Endeavor: Couldn’t have said it better myself.
-------------------

Chapter Text

All Might: Im bored af

Blood King: Me too.

Snipe: It feels so empty without Eraserhead and Mic in here.

Cementoss: Yeah…

Ingenium: Maybe we should add more people?

All Might: Like who?

Ingenium: Maybe my brother?

Endeavor: Hell no. We’re smash brothers, not computer nerds.

Snipe: lol

Ingenium: Well….can’t argue that…

Blood King: Damn…

All Might: Won't bother standing up for your own brother?

Ingenium: Hey, its true so....

Izuku: I have good news! Shinobu and Mr. Aizawa are back together!

All Might: Nice!

Snipe: Sweet

Blood King: So, where are they?

Izuku: Who knows. They just went home together, and Ochako and I are walking home.
--------------------

Chapter Text

All Might: So now that you guys are back together..Eraser…

Eraserhead: ?

All Might: You smashed yet?

Eraserhead: (smirks)……..

Blood King: tf?

Cementoss: You didn’t….

Endeavor: I’m calling the cops.

Eraserhead: Idiot, I didn’t smash her…yet…

All Might: Yet?

Eraserhead: She wanted the D today, so I gave her a little "preview". She won't be asking for my dick for a while.

All Might: A preview?

Eraserhead: That naughty girl was wearing a maid outfit with some cat ears. She was trying to get me hard. (Shows pick of Shinobu in a maid uniform. The dress is short sleeved and goes a few inches past her knees. She was also wearing black cat ears with a matching cat tail)

Endeavor: You sure you weren't watching a porno?

All Might: It sounds like one, doesn't it?

Powerloader: Yeah...

Eraserhead: My girlfriend is just that naughty I guess. Anyway, I was trying to get to sleep, and she came in my room and slept next to me. I asked her what she was doing, and she was like “trying to please you, master…”

All Might: Oh, my….

Cementoss: OMG this is soooo wrong

Eraserhead: So I got on top of her and started kissing her neck. We made out a little, and I started fingering her. A minute and two fingers later she orgasmed. She was so sensitive to my touch.

All Might: Damn…that’s hot.

Cementoss: Yeah…..

Snipe: Not gonna lie I want a girl like that.

All Might: What happened after that?

Eraserhead: I told her “Don’t tempt me again or I’ll fuck the daylights out of you. You’ll be limping for weeks.” And she fainted out of embarrassment, so now she’s sleeping in her bed.

All Might: Damn.

Endeavor: Still not comfortable with you doing that to a young girl, but hey. She over the age of consent, so…

Eraserhead (still smirking): Can’t wait for her to turn 18. I’m gonna have so much fun with her.

All Might: What kinda fun?

Snipe: lol what that binding cloth do tho

Cementoss: lol Snipe.

Eraserhead: Hm…..that’s a good idea. I was just thinking of making her wear some nice cat lingerie I found online.

Everyone:…………

Endeavor: Wow, you’re such a furry
--------------------

Chapter Text

Eraserhead: I’m fucked…..

Mic: I’ve seen their grades. I think most of them will do fine!

Eraserhead: Doubt it

All Might: What’s wrong?

Cementoss: All Might, you don’t know? Students have midterms next week.

All Might: Seriously???

Eraserhead: Dumbass. How are you a teacher and you don’t even know that???

All Might: I don’t really focus on the academics. Sorry.

Snipe: Well, I kind of agree with Mic. Most of your students are smart.

Eraserhead: ‘Smart’ huh?

Cementoss: Definitely.

All Might: Will Young Midoriya be okay at least?

Eraserhead: Yeah, he’s one of the actual smart ones.

Mic: Anyone else?

Eraserhead: (takes out a piece of paper dividing the students up by their grades). Let’s see…there’s Shinobu, Yayorozu, Todoroki, Bakugou, Midoriya, and Tenya. They are my best students, and personally, I call them the “overachieving, goody-goody group”.

All Might: Why do you call them that?

Eraserhead: They almost never get failing grades, and are most likely to cry like babies if I fail them for any reason. Just last week, I purposely gave Midoriya a D, and he came to my office crying like a baby. It was hilarious.

All Might:……

Mic: That’s just awful.

Cementoss: You know he’s in the chat, right?

Blood King: Wow, you’re the worst teacher ever.

Eraserhead: I know!

Snipe: So, what about the other students?

Eraserhead: Most of them are average, and then there’s the legendary dumby force consisting of Ashido, Kaminari, Sato, and Kirishima. With the exception of Sero, they were all in the remedial course at summer camp.

Endeavor: So a fourth of your class is made up of dumbasses?? Lol

Eraserhead: Yeah, but that’s the least of my problems. Nezu wants my class to earn an 80 or above average on the exams. If we do, he’ll give me a raise and an added bonus. If not, then he'll lower my pay. Stupid mouse...

All Might: Damn, he’s literally gonna mess with your paper?

Cementoss: He’s quite a sadist.

Blood King: He’s doing the same shit to me….

Snipe: Seriously?

Eraserhead: I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we need to team up.

Blood King: Nah, my class is full of mediocre students. There’s no hope for me…

Eraserhead: I can get my best students to whip yours into shape.

Blood King: We can try, but I doubt it will help.

Chapter Text

==========
(After the midterms…..)

Eraserhead and Blood King: Hallelujah!

All Might: Both your classes did well?

Blood King: Hell yeah!

Cementoss: Nice

Snipe: Sweet

Mic: I knew you would both do well

Endeavor: So, who got the higher average?

Blood King: 1-B got an 83 average, but Eraser’s class was ten points higher.

Eraserhead: And it was all thanks to my girlfriend. She got a perfect score

Endeavor: Damn

Snipe: Jeez

Cementoss: I believe it.

Mic: I wish I was that smart…

All Might: Eraser, you owe your girl so much dick

Eraserhead: (smirks) ikr

Everyone else:………

All Might: What?
==================

Blood King: (drunk af) That fuckin bastard…

All Might: What’s wrong?

Blood King: Eraser took half my bonus!

All Might: Seriously?

Endeavor: lol

Mic: Yeah, I believe it…

Snipe: How did he take your money?

Blood King: He wanted compensation for the tutoring sessions. And then, I saw his ass give some money to his overachieving kids! Can you believe that shit?

Endeavor: tf? Did you expect those kids to tutor yours for free?

Blood King: Hell yeah! I thought we were all in this bitch together, and then he stabbed me in the back….

All Might: tbh I would have done the same shit

Cementoss: Me too. Those kids needed some kind of reward for their hard work

Endeavor: Especially my son. He’s not your damn slave!

Blood King: tf, why am I the bad guy???
------------------

Chapter Text

Mic: Good news everyone! I'm dating Joke!

Eraserhead: Finally…..

Snipe: Awesome!

Cementoss: Good for you, Mic.

All Might: Y’all smash yet?

Mic: Not yet, but I’m planning on doing it tonight!

Eraserhead: So soon?

Mic: Well, unlike your girlfriend, mine’s an adult, so….

Endeavor: lol

Snipe: Damn, burrrrrrrn….

Eraserhead: tf you talkin' about? We had sex last week.

Everyone: WTF???

Endeavor: That's it, I'm calling the cops…

Eraserhead: Fuck you Endeavor.

Cementoss: Honestly, I didn’t expect you to have sex with her so……..soon

Eraserhead: We’ve been dating for months now. What do you mean ‘so soon’?

Mic: Shota, she’s just a young girl….

All Might: Damn, well, I have a very important question for you then…Eraser….

Eraser:????

All Might: Did she have some good pussy?

Eraserhead: Mmmm……hell yeah…..

Mic: ALL MIGHT!!!!

All Might: What? If Shinobu was okay with it, then why can’t I?

Mic:……..

Ingenium: What’s up guys?

Mic: Ingenium, call the police!

Eraserhead: Mic, seriously?

Mic: Yes, I’m serious!

Eraserhead: Wtf man

Mic: Only a sicko would fuck a teenaged girl!

Eraserfan: Guys…..

Eraserhead:….

Mic:…..

Eraserfan: Mic, we both support you and Joke’s relationship. All that I ask is that you accept ours.

Mic:……

Endeavor: Sorry kid, but that beta will never accept your relationship.

Cementoss: It's sad how such a strong relationship can be broken so easily…

Snipe: That’s a good point. Mic and Eraser have known each other for years. After so long, a bond like that shouldn’t be broken over a simple disagreement.

Mic: Its more than a ‘simple disagreement’. Shinobu is a young, cheerful, energetic, innocent girl. She’s an exceptional student with many friends. She deserves to be in a relationship, but not with my best friend, who shouldn’t be screwing one of his students let alone a girl he should be taking care of.

Eraserfan: Mic…

Eraserhead: We already went through that, Mic. She may be my student, but she can make her own decisions, just like me. Nezu accepts our relationship, so why are you still mad?

Mic:….

Eraserhead: Besides, I’m still taking good care of her……

Eraserfan: (blushing) Sh-shota-kun…..

Mic: It doesn’t matter, its still fucked up….

Eraserfan: It may be, but isn’t life, in general, fucked up???

Eraserhead: Kid….

Endeavor: That’s some deep shit..

Cementoss: True

Snipe: Yeah

All Might: Life is all flavors of fuckery.

Mic:……

Joke: LOL Mic, why are you getting so worked up over this???

Everyone: !

All Might: How the hell did you get in the chat? I never added you!

Joke: Oh, I asked Shinobu about your chat, and she offered to hack it and add me…

Cementoss: You can hack a chat?

Snipe: My god….

Endeavor: Shit, Eraser why didn’t you tell us your girl was a computer whiz?

Eraser: Don’t ask me, I didn’t know!

Joke: Anyway…..Mic, stop it. Just let them be happy.

Mic: But….

Joke: Eraser and Shinobu have every right to be together. You might not like it because of their age difference (and Eraser being her teacher and all…) but, as long as they are happy, then that’s all that matters.

Mic:……

Joke: Also….(blushing) I appreciate your concern for me, but I had to give myself time to sulk and get over it. And, now I'm over it.

Mic:……

Eraserhead: Joke is right you know.

Mic: Fine. Eraser, Shinobu, I’m sorry.

Eraserhead: No hard feelings, man. You’ll always be my…..my…

Eraserfan: Friend?

Eraserhead: Yeah, that….

Eraserfan: Apology accepted! The three of us should go out to celebrate!

Eraserhead: I’m okay with that.

Joke: Can I come? We can have a double date!

Mic: Good idea!
============

Chapter Text

All Might: Good morning everyone!

Eraserhead:…Morning….

Mic: MORNING!!!

Snipe: What’s up?

Cementoss: Hi!

Blood King: Hey All Might!

Endeavor: Sup.

Izuku: Hey All Might!

Eraserhead:…….

Mic: You still pissed off by that?

Eraserhead: Hell yeah…I can’t stand that asshole…

All Might: Who?

Eraserhead: Shinso….

Cementoss: That kid from general studies?

Eraserhead: Yeah, he’s one of my proteges..

Snipe: So, what’s up?

Mic: Shota is just jealous. His girlfriend is spending more time with that kid than him.

Eraserhead:…….

Endeavor: lol…lost your girl to a younger dude?

Eraserhead: I did NOT lose her….that motherfucker is just getting too close to her…

Snipe: What are they doing anyway?

Mic: Just innocent stuff. I see them sparing a lot after school, and they get ice cream afterwards. Most of the time, they’re usually with Izuku and his friends.

Izuku: Yeah.

All Might: Oh, I remember now! He’s that mind control kid Young Midoriya fought at the festival!

Eraserhead: Don’t remind me….

Mic: Shota, he wouldn’t use his quirk on her!

Eraserhead: He bed not.

Snipe: Wait, isn't his quirk mind control or something?

Cementoss: Yeah. Just by answering a question, he can make you do anything he wants. It’s a pretty impressive quirk.

Endeavor: Damn, he probably already…

Eraserhead: Don't you DARE say it!

All Might: Endeavor, he can’t just use his quirk like that.

Izuku: Besides, they’re just friends.

Eraserhead: ‘Just friends’ my ass! I’m fine with her being around you, but that fuck? No way! I know what that little me rip off is trying to do!

Izuku: You….ripoff???

Cementoss: Come to think of it, his hairstyle looks a lot like yours.

Snipe: And he always looks sleepy.

Everyone: Mmmmm….
===============

Eraserhead: That’s it!

Cementoss: Is it Shinobu again?

Eraserhead: Yeah, its late and she hasn’t come back yet. She told me she was with Izuku and Ochako, but I know for a fact Shinso is also with them!

Izuku: He was, but don’t worry! We left them at the park. They should still be there.

Eraserhead:…….Problem child, if anything happens to my girl, I’m putting my foot so far up your ass…

All Might: Calm down, Eraser.

Cementoss: I doubt anything will happen. Plus, Shinobu is much stronger than him.

Eraserhead: That’s not my problem. She’s ridiculously naïve! He’s probably fooling her into her panties as we speak!

Izuku: Can’t believe my teacher is really thinking this..

Eraserfan: lol Shota-kun, I’m fine. Me and Shinso were just talking.

Eraserhead: About what?

Izuku: They were talking about you. Can I tell him, Shinobu?

Eraserfan: No, I will…(blushing) we both admire you a lot. Because of that, we spend more and more time together. Just today, we talked bout how awesome you are. I told him about what happened to you at the USJ incident, he was estastic. You make us both want to become heroes.

Eraserhead:…..I….didn’t know that…

Endeavor: Wow…..

Cementoss: So sweet…

All Might: Aww…..

*An hour later*

All Might added Shinso to the chat

Shinso:…..

Eraserhead:……

Eraserfan: Hi, Shinso…

Shinso: Hey.

Eraserhead: Shinso……

Shinso: Yeah???

Eraserhead: I really don’t trust you, especially around my girl, but as long as you understand one thing, (sends a link of a song called “I hit it first” by Ray Jay) I…can tolerate it…

Eraserfan (blushing): Sh-shota-kun!

Shinso: Go fuck yourself, old man. And I don’t want your girlfriend.

Eraserhead: OLD MAN??!!! I’m 30 years old!!!!!

Endeavor: LOL

Eraserfan: Oh no…. :(
==============

Chapter Text

All Might added 13 and Midnight to the chat

13: Hey guys!

Everyone: Hi!

All Might: As it turns out, he’s a smash brother!

13: You get A TON of ladies in the rescuing field.

Eraserhead: Wait, you’re a guy?

Mic: Duh!

Endeavor: You didn’t know?

Eraserhead: How the hell can y’all tell? He wears a fucking space suit all the time!

Snipe: Not gonna lie, I didn’t know so I just asked.

Cementoss: Me too.

Mic: I did too!

All Might: I as well.

Izuku: I thought 13 was a girl too. He sounds like one at least.

Eraserfan: I thought so too.

Powerloader and Ingenium: Us too

All Might: Wait, where have y’all been?

Powerloader: Well…we……

Ingenium: Got…….together….

Everyone: WHAT?!

Endeavor: Y’all got together before the faggots did? Damn..

Eraserhead: The ‘faggots’ have girls now, dumbass.

Endeavor: So what? Y’all still gay af

Eraser and Mic:……

All Might: Good for you both! Honestly, I also expected those two to be our first Smash Brothers Homosexual couple, but I was dead wrong…

Cementoss: Thanks to y’all I lost my money to Blood King….

Blood King: I told you they were a couple!

Powerloader and Ingenium: You bet on us?

Cementoss: Yeah….
--------

Midnight:…….What’s up…???

All Might: Welcome, Midnight!

Midnight: So, why is this group called Smash Brothers?

All Might: Well, it was originally for just male pro heroes talking about fucking, but now it's about anything we want, and we have Shinobu in the group.

Eraserfan: Hi Midnight!

Midnight: Hey sweetie! I saw the earlier chats, and…..I totally approve of you two!

Eraserfan and Eraserhead: (blushing) Thanks….

Midnight: And, sorry about you and Izuku’s mom, All Might…

All Might: It's fine. I’m already over it

Endeavor: So, just curious: what’s your sexuality?

Midnight: Definitely straight!

Eraserhead: Really? I always assumed you were bi

Midnight: I was in high school, but dick is just too good, don’t you agree, Shinobu?

Eraserfan: (blushing) Y-yeah…..

Eraserhead: (smirking) You can have my loli later if you like it so much….

Eraserfan: (blushing) You both are so dirty….

Mic: Yeah. Sorry, its just how they are.

Joke: Sweet! New people!

Izuku: Morning….

Everyone: Hey Joke! Izuku!

Chapter Text

All Might: So, now that all of us are here, we can play a little game.
 
Eraserhead: Like what?
 
All Might: To get to know each other better, let’s all play Truth or Dare!
 
Everyone: All right!
 
All Might: I can start first, and then we can go from there, everyone got it?
 
Everyone: Got it!
 
All Might: Okay. Mic, truth or dare?
 
Mic: Dare!
 
All Might: I dare you to kiss Eraserhead and send a pic of it!
 
Mic and Eraserhead: WHAT?!
 
Eraserfan: I am 100% fine with this!
 
Joke: Me too!
 
Mic and Eraserhead:…….(Mic kisses Eraser and sends pic)
 
All Might: So cute….
 
Eraserfan: Yeah…
 
Joke: Nothing like best friends kissing!
 
Mic and Eraserhead:…………….
 
Mic:……Powerloader, truth or dare?
 
Powerloader: Dare.
 
Mic: Nice! I dare you to……tell us about you and Ingenium’s first date!
 
Ingenium: (blushing)
 
Powerloader: Well, we just Netflix and chilled.
 
Eraserfan: What’s that?
 
Midnight: So innocent…..
 
All Might: Netflix and chill is just what it sounds like: you get your partner, binge watch on Netflix, and hopefully smash afterward.
 
Eraserfan: (blushing) Oh…
 
Eraserhead: (smirking) do you wanna try it, babe?
 
Eraserfan: (blushing) N-no……
 
Powerloader: 13, truth or dare?
 
13: Truth.
 
Powerloader: How often do people mistake you for a girl?
 
13: Unfortunately, a lot.
 
Everyone:…..
 
13: Blood King, truth or dare?
 
Blood King: Truth.
 
13: Who’s the smartest kid in your class?
 
Blood King: Eh, most of my students are dumb af, but Kendo’s okay I guess…
 
Blood King: Snipe, truth or dare?
 
Snipe: Truth.
 
Blood King: Did you really touch Toru’s boobs during the Final Exam?
 
Snipe: Regrettably, yes…
 
Everyone:……….
 
Snipe: All Might, truth or dare?
 
All Might: Truth.
 
Snipe: How many women have you smashed?
 
All Might: I lost count after 30…
 
Everyone: WTF???
 
Eraserhead: That’s a LOT of stds, man.
 
Endeavor: lol ikr
 
All Might: What y’all expect? The #1 hero always gets plenty of pussy….
 
Eraserhead: You can have whatever girl you want, except for, you know, Izuku’s mom…
 
Izuku:….
 
All Might: :‘(
 
Eraserfan: Shota!
 
Eraserhead: What? It's true.
 
All Might: Anyway, I already went so…Ingenium???
 
Ingenium: Okay. Eraser, truth or dare?
 
Eraserhead: Truth
 
Ingenium: There’s something I wanted to ask, it's about Tenya. Did he….do something during his internship????
 
Eraserhead: Um…yeah.
 
Izuku: Oh shit….
 
Everyone: !
 
Eraserfan: Izuku just cursed!
 
Eraserhead: But I swear, I had NOTHING to do with it. If you want to know, you have to ask Midoriya.
 
Izuku: Mr. Aizawa! Why?!
 
Eraserhead: Sorry Problem Child. I gotta save my own ass.
 
Izuku:…….traitor…..
 
Ingenium: Alright…..
 
Eraserhead: Joke, truth or dare?
 
Joke: Dare!
 
Eraserhead: Okay, now I dare you and my girl to make out and videotape it. You guys have to make out for at least 3 minutes.
 
Mic: Yeah, and make it really hot!
 
Joke and Eraserfan:………(they make out and videotape it, then send it to Mic and Eraser privately, knowing what they’ll use it for)
 
Eraserhead: (smirking) Thanks. See Mic, we do have the best girls ever.
 
Mic: Sure do!
 
Eraserfan: (blushing)
 
Joke:…………
 
Endeavor: Y’all ain't gon share?
 
Mic: Do you actually want to see our girlfriends make out?
 
Endeavor: Kinda…..
 
Everyone:……
 
Joke: Okay, it's my turn! Shinso, truth or dare?
 
Shinso: Truth.
 
Joke: Is it true that you're in love with Shinobu?
 
Shinso: To be honest, I had a crush on her, but now I’m over it
 
Eraserfan: (blushing) You did?
 
Shinso: Yeah. Besides Midoriya, you were the only one that didn’t treat me like a villain cause of my quirk. Plus, I admired how hard you worked.
 
Eraserfan: Awww! Thanks, Shinso! :)
 
Shinso: (blushing) I was….just being honest….. Endeavor, truth or dare?
 
Endeavor: Dare….(Shinso’s quirk activates)
 
Everyone: !
 
Shinso: I dare you to give your honest opinion of everyone.
 
Endeavor:………. I admire All Might. Though he’s my rival and I’m ticked off I have never beaten him, I have always looked up to him. In the past, I’ve done a lot of fucked up shit, especially to my family, but I love my wife and kids a lot: they mean so much to me. I’m jealous of Eraserhead. I connect with him a lot because he’s so closed off and kind of a dick, but he still has friends, students who admire him, and a girl that loves him no matter what. Izuku, thanks to him my son is using his fire power and I can tell he’s growing as a hero and a man. I can’t thank him enough. I hope he continues being his friend. And, though I don’t know most of y’all in the chat, I love y’all and low key want to smoke weed, or drink or do some weird shit with y’all……….
 
Everyone:……………
 
Eraserhead: God Damn…..
 
All Might: That was beautiful….
 
Endeavor: (quirk deactivated) THE FUCK DID I JUST TYPE?!!!
 
Eraserfan: Shinso….why did you…?
 
Shinso: Just thought it would be funny is all
 
Endeavor: You better sleep with one eye open, kid!
 
Eraserhead: I had no idea you felt that way, Endeavor…
 
Endeavor: Shut it faggot. And, while your talkin, truth or dare???
 
Eraserhead: Dare, bitch.
 
Endeavor (smirks): I dare you to tell us what goes on in that bedroom….
 
Eraserfan: (blushing)
 
Eraserhead: Shit…he got me…
 
All Might: C’mon , I want to know!
 
Mic: Me too!
 
Eraserhead: Well…..nothing too bad, she is still young of course.
 
Eraserfan: Its mostly just.......maid outfits and cat ears.....
 
Eraserhead: Yeah, nothing makes me harder than seeing my bae in a maid uniform...mmmmmm....
 
Everyone:………….
 
Endeavor: So, what about the sadist shit y’all do?
 
Eraserhead: Eh, I do have handcuffs, butt plugs, a whip, …..alot of stuff really, but I won’t do that stuff until she’s older.
 
Eraserfan: (blushing)
 
Eraserhead: (smirking) Hey Problem child, you wanna go?
 
Izuku: Sure. Mic, truth or dare?
 
Mic: Truth.
 
Izuku: How did you and Eraser become friends?
 
Mic: It was after our first Sports Festival. During our fight, we bonded a little.
 
Eraserhead: And after that, he wouldn’t leave me alone….
 
Mic: Cause we’re friends!
 
Eraserhead: (blushing) I guess….
 
Mic: Cementoss?
 
Cementoss: Okay. Midnight, truth or dare?
 
Midnight: Truth.
 
Cementoss: Is it true that you’re a dominatrix?
 
Midnight: Yeah…
 
Everyone: WHAT????
 
Eraserfan: What’s that?
 
Eraserhead: It’s a person who gives sexual pleasure to someone through pain. People pay for their services.
 
Eraserfan: So, she’s like you, but people have to pay her?
 
Everyone:……..
 
Midnight: My turn! Eraserfan, truth or dare?
 
Eraserfan: Dare.
 
Everyone: Oh my…
 
Midnight: I dare you to….spend the day with me next Sunday!
 
Everyone: (breathes a sigh of relief)
 
Eraserfan: Okay!
 
Eraserhead: Where are you taking her?
 
Midnight: Just to the mall. Me, Joke, and Mt. Lady need some girl time together. And, you can also bring Ochako if you want.
 
Eraserfan: Alright! Thanks for inviting me!
 
Eraserfan: I think I’m last. Izuku, truth or dare?
 
Izuku: Truth.
 
Eraserfan: Did something happen between you and Bakugou? I heard you two were friends growing up.
 
Izuku: We were, but…….
 
All Might: C’mon, Young Midoriya. You have to tell the truth.
 
Izuku: Well, I didn’t want to say anything, but we were friends until he found out I was quirkless. After that, he started bullying me…..
 
Everyone:……………….
 
Eraserfan: I’m sorry for bringing it up…….
 
Eraserhead: Problem child, why the hell didn’t you tell me?
 
Izuku: He isn’t bullying me anymore, so I didn’t want to say anything………plus, the teachers in middle school would never do anything. They always took his side…….
 
Eraserfan: That’s awful…
 
All Might: And Young Bakugou wants to be a hero???
 
Cementoss: Eraser, we should do something.
 
Midnight: Maybe we should put him in general courses, depending on how severe the bullying was?
 
Izuku: NO! He shouldn’t be punished for his mistakes in the past! Please…..
 
Eraserfan: Izuku……..
 
Eraserhead: Well, we’ll talk about this later.