He was moving back. Back to a place he was forced to leave. Back to a place he dreaded to enter.
Except it wasn’t the place he dreaded. It was someone.
Someone who’s heart he had broken four years back.
And he didn’t have an excuse for his cowardly choice. Truth is he was a glorified asshole and chikenshit whose balls his father had practically snipped off.
Everyday beaten senseless by his father till he succumbed to his fears. Everyday chanting, ‘Homosexuality is a sin’. It was the exact words his father would bombard him with day in, day out. Becoming more frequent when he discovered Deans secret of dating another boy named Castiel Novak. And so he made him leave or face hell on earth.
Or the other option his dad gave him, Castiel faces hell on earth.
Don’t you dare turn around and acknowledge him Dean! Walk away and never look back!
And now he is back because she wants to come back. His fiancé, who he had chosen over Castiel, wanted to continue her family business of auto care and servicing.
And it made a pit form in his tummy. What if he sees him again? How will he face him again?
He can’t bear to see Castiel’s hurt and betrayed expression again.
He was startled when two little kids in jammies smacked straight into his legs making him fall on his ass due to the surprising force. He decided to lay on his back staring at the white ceiling when he heard giggling and two dark brown haired, freckled, green eyed, bright identical looks finding their way into his line of sight by peeking down at him from above.
The one on the right, asked with a quizzical look, “Mr….Are you ok?!”
The one on the left added, “Do you has a booboo?”
Deans heart absolutely melted at the boys concern. He chuckled, “Um I’m fine boys”. He sat up slowly watching the boys step back. The one on the left threading his fingers into his brothers. He smiled toothily, “You boys are very strong. What have you been eating, I wonder?”
“Papa says we has to eats our broccoli and vege….vege…”, the one on the right giving a dramatic sigh and turning to his twin on the left, “How’s do you says it Roman?!”
“It’s vegebables Ryder! Sheesh!” Roman says with an adorable roll of his eyes.
Dean let out a quiet laugh at both the boys mispronunciations. He watched the boys giggle at him before he cleared his throat, glancing around, “Do you boys stay here?”
“Yeah!” Ryder walked to the ajar door beside his, “This one. Number 13”.
“London Street, Bree Apartments, Number 13, floor number 3, and my papa’s number is 1255557819 and his name is Ca-“, added Roman very thoroughly. Well almost.
“Boys?!” Came a feminine voice that sounded a little panicky from within apartment 13.
“Over here aunty Char!” Ryder called out. “We ran over a Mr. “. He turned to Dean, “What’s your name Mr.?”
Dean could only chuckle, “Dean. Mr. Dean Winchester”.
“Mr. Dean Inchester!”
Dean got up, dusting his pants once again trying to hold in his laughter at Ryders mispronunciation. He saw a red haired, sharp cheeked, bright eyed girl around her 20’s wearing a Gryffindor tee head towards them with a disapproving look aimed at the boys.
Meanwhile, instead of the boys getting scared, they plastered on the most charming smile that made two sets of dimples pop out on either sides of their cheeks. Dean got that sense of familiarity growing within him. Those dimples reminded him of someone. Sammy. He was once again thrown out of thought when the red head gushed.
“Oh you boys!” She clasped at her heart, “Now how can aunty Char stay mad at you boys when you got them charming weapons on display. Oh you will both break hearts”.
Dean had to agree, Ryder and Roman were going to definitely break hearts someday. He cleared his throat, making the red head finally notice him. He stuck out his hand, “Hi. I’m the new resident next door. Dean”.
The red head beamed, shaking Deans hand, “Hello Dean. I’m Charlie”. She rested her hands on the boys shoulders, “I’m their aunt and baby sitter for the day while their papa is out for work. Are you moving in alone?” Her eyes held curiosity.
“Oh no. My fiancé and I are moving in. She is currently out for lunch with her parents”.
Charlie found that awkward. She sighed, clearly a little disappointed, before masking it with a jovial smile, “Well it was nice to meet you Dean. I need to make these two trouble makers lunch”.
“They eat lunch in their jammies?” Dean nodded.
“They love their teddy bear jammies. Couldn’t get them outta it. And because they're super cute and said they will behave, I let them keep it on for now”.
Dean chuckled, getting down on one knee, eyes meeting greens and a face that was once again stirring up a sense of familiarity. Maybe he was too tired with all the moving around. He smiled at the boys, “You boys take care alright. See ya around Ryder and Roman”. He got up and ruffled the giggling boys dark brown hair.
“Bye Mr. Inchester!” Both boys beamed happily, waving at Dean before disappearing into their apartment with their aunt Charlie.
Dean smiled to himself before picking up the box he dropped onto the floor. So far, so good.
Castiel has a conversation over the phone with his boys :D
“Papa!” Two voices that always made his heart soar bounced out the loudspeaker of his phone.
Castiel was currently driving back to their apartment and had his phone perched near the dash, right before him. He was stuck in rush hour traffic and so decided to occupy his time by talking to his babies over the phone.
They always made his day and filled him up with instantaneous joy.
“So how have you boys been? Have you both been good to aunty Char?”
“We good papa! We helps aunty Char clean the house and do the laundry!” Roman, he guessed, due to his lighter tone of voice said quite enthusiastically.
“Yeah papa. We totally awesome!” added Ryder.
“Well I’m very happy to hear that loves”, he chuckles. “Anything interesting happen today? Anything new you learnt?”
“Yeah!” Roman and Ryder squealed excitedly.
Castiel raised a curious brow, smiling, “Aha please share with papa?”
“Ryder you tell papa! I has to pee!” Roman squeaked before his little feet could be heard pattering away on their wooden varnished floor.
“But I wants to pee too!” Ryder yelled out after his brother, mind distracted off the call.
Roman could be heard squealing, “You pee after I come back!”
“You a poop Roman!” Ryder roared.
“Blah blah blah blah!” The toilet could be heard flushing before the pattering of feet approached. “Your turn grumpy!” Before more tiny hurried footsteps were heard.
“Hi papa! I’m back!”
Castiel couldn’t help but chuckle joining Charlie who was laughing in the background. Sometimes he swore his children were downright related to clowns. He cleared his throat, “Aha how was your pee break sonny?”
“The toilet seat didn’t fall on my Willy papa! I mades sure!”
“Well congratulations sweetheart. I’m proud of you”, Castiel shook his head. He was about to continue from their earlier interrupted conversation when all of a sudden there was a tiny screech heard from a distance before Charlie could be heard scurrying over to the source asking in a frantic tone, “Oh my goodness, Ryder are you ok?!”
Castiel was instantly on alert, sitting up and white knuckling the wheel, blurting, “Roman is your brother alright?”
After a few seconds, Roman spluttered, “Papa. The toilet seats fell on Ryders Willy. But he’s ok”.
Castiel still held his breath. He uttered, “Call aunty Char to the phone sweetheart”. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his sons word, it’s just that he needed to speak to someone much older. Just to be sure.
Castiel had always ensured his babies were well fed and happy. They have never gotten sick or even a scrape on their bodies a day in their lives. Well the only time they had gotten a little ill was during the time they were teething but not after that. So coming down to his baby’s well-being, it was at the top of his list. Nothing gets taken lightly in his eyes.
The traffic was flowing smoothly when Charlie answered, “ Hey Cas. What’s up?”
“Is he ok? Did he get hurt?”
“Woah, woah take a deep breath Cas. If you’re referring to Ryders little toilet seat accident, then let me tell you that there has been no damage. He is absolutely fine”.
“Did you check?” Castiel wanted to be thorough.
“I promise. You can even come see for yourself when you get back if you’re worried. However, I assure you that he is fine. He actually broke out into laughter, practically rolling around on the floor clutching his tummy. Saying something about the toilet seat missing his Willy and that meant he was the winner”. She sighs, “Your children are very confusing and too cute sometimes”.
Castiel let out a deep breath, “Phew! Thank the heavens”.
“Mhmm you need to chill my sweet Castiel. Aunty Char will keep the boys safe”.
Castiel smiled, “Thanks Charlie. I really appreciate everything you’re doing. You’re amazing and a great friend. Especially if you have to put up with my over energetic bundles of joy”.
He was really lucky to have her as a good friend. Always been there for him since the day they met in the hospital three and a half years back after his delivery to the twins. She was a volunteer at the hospital and always visited his bedside, sharing food with him, keeping him company, making him happy and eventually being there for him during the hard times.
However, there was one subject he didn’t broach much with her and that was Dean Winchester.
He would slip in a thing or two about Dean. But never his full name, nor his picture and thank the heaven’s she wasn’t really pushy. The reason being he was reserved because talking about Dean still hurt. He still at times held back tears when he looks at his children’s faces and at times when in the privacy of his own bedroom would sometimes cry himself to exhaustion and then sleep.
But it was getting better.
He was starting to get himself in check. For the sake of his kids, he needed to. So now he was attending three monthly counselling sessions with the amazing Dr. Pamela Barnes for the past year. And my God was it working real well.
If you asked him if he was still the weak, shy Castiel he once was, well his reply would be 'that's history'.
He was more focused, more headstrong.
“Hello Castiel! Did you hear me?”
Castiel blinked repeatedly, “Hmm what is it Charlie?”
Charlie sighed, “Seriously buddy. Anyway….I was just saying that the boys made a new friend today with the new tenant next door”.
Castiel cocked his head, “New tenant? Hmm its about time someone occupied apartment 14. Been vacant for a whole year". Castiel asked with a hint of renewed curiosity, "Do I even want to know how the boys got outside the apartment?”
Before Charlie could answer, Ryder interrupted, squealing, “We ran into Mr. Inchester papa!”
“Yeah and he falls on his butts because we eats our vegebables papa!” added Ramon.
He decided to play along and gasped, “Really?!”
“Yeah Really!” Ryder repeated.
Charlie gushed, “Oh Cas you should see him. He is Mr. Dreamy. Uh! Too bad he’s taken otherwise he would have been just your type”.
“Not ready to get on the dating wagon Char. Got my hands full at the moment”, Castiel said firmly but couldn’t help but feel a hint of disappointment seething underneath.
Charlie must have caught on. She was just that good at reading him. She sighed, “Castiel, I’m taking you out this Saturday. And James will be accompanying us along with my girlfriend. And no butts!” She quickly added.
Castiel shook his head. Ever since Charlie had introduced him to James, she would organize ways for all of them to meet up. There was also the part where she says that James likes him and he could see that too. The man was charming and absolutely handsome. And Castiel was definitely attracted, however, he was still a little unsure or uncertain if he was ready to pursue anything. He huffed, “Charlie I can't”.
“Castiel. I’m not implying that you force yourself into something you’re not ready for. I’m just saying that maybe you should let loose, have a night of fun with your friends and just relax ok. Something different for a change plus I’ll have you back home by 12”.
Castiel bit his lip, maybe he did need a night out with friends for a change. He added, “Fine red. But I get to pick the bar”.
“Deal!” Charlie chuckled. “Anyway gotta cut you off. See ya soon”.
Before Charlie hung up, Castiel could hear Roman asking, “What’s a Mr. Dreamy aunty Char?”
Castiel snorted and shook his head. Oh boy, good luck answering that Charlie.
He could see the apartment complex right ahead. Almost home.
Hope you enjoyed the second chapter. Oh the boys are too sweet. Tell me what you think my lovelies? :)
Joanna and he settled in pretty well. Their unpacked boxes were still loitered around the apartment. They now sat on the floor of their living room eating Chinese.
Jo asked while poking at her noodles, “So anything interesting happen today hon?”
He threw a slice of chicken into his mouth, nodding, “Hmm yup. Met the kids next door. Apartment 13”.
“Wow and how did that happen?”
He chuckled, “They actually bumped into me and knocked me off my feet. Literally”.
Joanna ecstatically asked while trying to hold in her laughter, “And how old were they?”
“Um I think they’re like 3 or 4”.
“Wow and they knocked you down?” Joanna snorted.
He rolled his eyes, “Ha-ha laugh it up sweetheart. Very funny”. He set his container aside and grabbed the wine and two glasses. He poured into each and handed one to his fiancé, raising his wine glass, “To our new apartment and life”.
Joanna giggled and clinked her glass to his, “Here, here”.
He watched his future wife finish the whole glass in one gulp. He raised as amused brow, “Well someone wants to dial it up a notch”. He teased.
Joanna set her glass aside and crawled to him with a coy flirty look that had his groin stirring. He just sat back and watched as she grabbed the half full wine glass from his hand and setting it on the coffee table before she straddled his lap. His hand running up the length of her thighs, pushing her dress up all the way to her waist. He was hard and throbbing. His fiancé leaned into him, whispering against his lips, “What’s say we start christening the apartment Dean?”
Dean nipped at her bottom lip, “I love that idea Joanna Beth”.
He smashed his lips to hers forgetting all else.
He kissed his boys on the forehead as they both lay in their beds. He smiled at his sweethearts, “So what do you want papa to read to you today loves?”
“Can you read Harry Potter and the sorcerous stone to us papa?!” Roman asked excitedly.
“Yeah papa! We loves magic!” Ryder backed his brothers request up quite enthusiastically.
He chuckled. His boys surely loved the Harry Potter collection ever since aunty Charlie brought the movie over. They got more excited when they found out there were books too. And he really didn’t mind because he did enjoy reading about magical adventures too . He nodded, “Ok boys. But papa will read one chapter every night before bed since each chapter is quite long. Do you agree with papa?”
“Yes papa!” They both chorused happily.
He loved his precious time with his boys especially bed time story telling. He sat on Ryder’s bed, his son Roman snuggled into his brother. He began to read as the boys attentively listened. But not for long as both boys were out by the fifth page in.
He closed the book gently, settling in on the nightstand before he walked over to the opposite side of Ryder’s bed and slowly lifted Roman into his arms. He laid his youngest on his bed, pulling the covers up and tucking it in. He laid kisses on both boys forehead whispering, “Good night angels. Sweetdreams”.
The boys looked so peaceful in sleep. Such blessings they were in his life and forever will be no matter what.
He walked into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes tiredly. Charlie asked, “Are they asleep?”
“Yup”, he walked over to the fridge, getting out a bottle or red wine and pouring one for himself. He took a sip, “So you spending the night?”
Charlie smiled, “Mhmm. Can I?”
“Yeah feel free to Charlie. You’re always welcome”. He plunked his ass on the other side of the kitchen island, opposite Charlie. He took another sip, “So who’s this new tenant?”
“Dunno but the boys got along surprisingly well”. She gushed, “And boy oh boy was he eye candy. Too bad he is taken”.
He chuckled, taking a sip of wine, muttering, “The handsome ones always are either already married or gay”.
Charlie grinned, “Not all of them. You’re still single Castiel”.
He sighed, “Single and not ready to mingle Char”.
Charlie rolled her eyes, huffing out, “Fine!” She got up packing up her laptop, walking to his side and laying a peck on the top of his head, “Anyway I’m off to bed now. Oh and you gotta get some milk and eggs for breakfast”.
He smiled, “Ok I’ll do that first thing tomorrow. Night Red”.
He twirled the wine in his glass before gulping it down. He felt loose enough now to have a good night’s sleep. And he had to get an early one if he wanted to get up and visit the grocery store before breakfast.
“Hey honey can you visit the grocery store down the road and get us some milk?!", Jo gave him a peck on the cheek.
“Yeah sure babe”, He replied grabbing his wallet and putting on his sneakers.
He jogged to front door calling out, “See you soon!”
He could hear his girlfriend mumbling something in return but he was already out the door. He closed the door behind him and abruptly turned, which was a bad idea because he suddenly collided with a firm body, once again falling on his ass. He was just getting himself together wanting to apologize when a very familiar gravelly tone that had his heart instantly palpitating and the pit in his stomach forming, shakily asked, “D-Dean?” His eyes immediately meeting glassy blue orbs that were always so beautiful to him.
He felt that his words were lodged in his throat, both just staring before he uttered, “Castiel?”
They didn’t have enough time to say much more when the door to apartment 13 burst open and out scrambled Ryder and Roman. He watched with a skipping heart as the boys slammed into Castiel squealing in unison, “Papa where you going?!”
He watched as Castiel kneeled down to meet them eye level. He could see that Castiel was trying to compose himself and controlling his urges to turn his way. Castiel smiled shakily at the boys, “Sweethearts papa is going to the grocery store. I need to get us some eggs and milk, so I want you to be good boys and stay with aunty Char until I get back ok. Can you boys do that for papa?”
The boys lazily replied, “Okaaayy”.
He didn’t know how he managed to come back to his senses but the feeling he was missing some important piece of the puzzle kept presenting itself as he watched the scene unfold before him.
Castiel was a father to Ryder and Roman. His eyes couldn't help but take in the boys features once more. He could feel that feeling of familiarity that he felt yesterday when interacting with the boys begin to brew as he stared at the little ones dark hair, freckled cheeks, and green eyes.
He blurted, “Cas?” He aimed confused eyes at his ex who now stood up, trying to shield the boys away from his vision while shooting him a venomous look.
“Papa its Mr. Inchester! “ Ryder pointed from behind his papa.
Roman tilted his head, “What you doing on the floors Mr. Inchester? Did papa runs into you?!”
All he could reply was a weak, “Yeah”.
He watched as Castiel ushered the boys into their apartment, “Go wait for papa inside boys”.
He managed to get upright by the time Castiel had closed his apartment door. He rubbed his sweaty palms on his track pants. Once again his ex looked at him with a mixture of weary eyes and a somewhat dark look, “I’m surprised to see you back Dean. Thought you’d put this town in the rearview mirror nearly 4 years back?”
He really didn't know what to say to Cas as guilt and shame flooded his being. He rubbed the back of his neck, “Um yeah I am back now. Have a um family business that needs to be taken care of”.
“I don’t remember your family running a business in this town Dean”, Castiel frowned.
Oh God how does he say this? He cleared his throat, “Yeah um…its my fiancé’s family business”.
He swore he could see Castiels lips tremble, while the blue eyes that held his radiated a tinge of hurt. But then Castiels stoic face was back in place as the man just said, “Well good for you Dean. Anyway I have to go. My son’s will want to be having breakfast soon”.
With that Castiel turned away and headed towards the lift but before the man could enter, he asked, “Castiel…The boys…..Are they-..”.
“Yes Dean. They are. But that’s none to your concern”.
He was left flabbergasted. Suddenly he didn't feel like going anywhere as this feeling of wanting to throw up made itself known. He instantly stuck his key into the keyhole, unlocking the door to his apartment and rushing in, slamming the door behind him. He slid down the door, burying his face between his forearms as the overwhelming feeling of the one thought filled his mind.
He had sons. Two of them.
And the worst part about it was that even though he didn’t know, he still abandoned them.
He abandoned Castiel.
He didn’t know what the hell he was going to do from now on?
A/N: Comments and kudos inspire me to write so please I need them.
Oh crap. What. Had. Just. Happened?
He couldn’t think clearly as he got off the elevator. He went past Mrs. Hammond by the reception desk and still did not hear her call his name. He crossed the road that was luckily empty and went in a direction he wasn’t aware of. He entered the grocery shop, allowing his feet to lead him to the egg and milk section, reaching for the supplies he needed before heading blankly to the cashier.
He could hear someone saying his name. Why was the voice getting louder?
He startled, heart literally skipping a beat as he was stunted from his hypnosis or deep seated reverie. He finally saw he was standing before Amy, one of the grocery store cashier’s. He looked down at the items in his arms, slowly placing them onto the counter, apologizing, “I’m sorry Amy. Kinda spaced off a little”.
She swiped the items and smiled, “No worries Castiel. Everything ok?”
No! Apparently I just ran into Dean Winchester, former love of my life and father of my children. And now he knows that he has kids. However what came out was, “I’m fine Amy. Just ran into a ghost earlier”. Well that wasn’t entirely false.
She scanned his face before shrugging, “Well ok then”. She packed Castiels items into a bag, handing it over with a comforting smile, “Well if you need to talk to someone, then I’m happy to listen”.
He smiled, “Thank you Amy. That’s very kind of you but really I’m fine. You have a great day”.
He waved the cashier good bye and headed to his apartment with a much more alert mind.
He will deal with whatever later. He has gotten this far and no way was he going to let anyone or anything come in his way.
Certainly not Dean Winchester.
That’s what he was. No scratch that. That’s what he is.
A complete and utter shit of a human being.
Why? Why? Why was this happening to him?
Because you were an asshole.
Christ karma has a way of kicking you in the ass.
Joanna studied him while he stared at his pancakes, unmoving or not chewing. After a whole minute, she threw her napkin down on the table, blurting, “Ok what’s wrong Winchester?”
His eyes snapped to hers, mouth slightly agape, “Huh?!” Apparently his brain was too slow to catch up as she gave him a questioning look.
“You have barely touched your breakfast. Not to mention you looked like you had seen a ghost when you came back into the apartment and you refused to go to the grocery store”. She crossed her arms, “Something or someone spooked you Winchester, so spill!”
He couldn’t hold her gaze, sighing and rubbing at his temple, “You’re right. I did run into someone”. He swallowed and glanced up at her, “Someone from my past”.
Joanna aimed him a scrutinizing look remaining silent for another whole minute until she rolled her eyes, huffing, “Well are you going to tell me more about this ‘someone’? Because I promise you that I can’t mind read”.
His fingers fiddled nervously on his lap. He could feel the heat climbing and his sweat slicking up his skin. He cleared his throat, trying to will his slightly excited heart to calm. He answered, “I ran into my ex boyfriend Castiel”. He met her furrowed gaze.
“You mean Castiel your highschool sweetheart?” She added a little curiously, “I thought you both ended it on a good note?”
“What makes you think that it didn’t end on a good note?!" He couldn’t help but retort. His heart squeezing, guilt and self loathing consuming him.
“Because of your reaction when you came back to the apartment was not very positive Dean. If you ended things on a good note then there would be no problems now would there? I can tell that whatever happened when you met him is eating you up”.
He knew there was no escaping Joanna. She knew him too well. He licked his lips, “I lied. Things didn’t end so well with Castiel. All because I was a complete dick that let his own father dictate his whole life”. Tears finally prickled the corner of his eyes as he pictured the happy sweet faces of Roman and Ryder, voice tight as he supplied, “And now I find out I had left Castiel pregnant with two boys who are now four years old and living right beside us”.
He could hear Joanna gasp. Her voice a little on the angry side laced with disbelief as she announced, “You left him pregnant?”
He glanced up to see Joanna’s disappointed look. Her eyes bore into his soul, searching for any ounce of bullshit. He saw when she finally realized. She shook her head and got up hastily shoving her chair back. He could see her cheeks redden up and eyes were glassy as she made her way to the kitchen without another word.
He closed his eyes briefly. Time to face the music. He opened his eyes, gathering his still full plate and heading quietly to the kitchen. He was just in time to catch Jo swiping away a few tears, her back still to him. He felt like utter crap right now. He set his plate on the island and walked over to Jo, feeling her stiffen when he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. After a full minute, she relaxed a little, voice nasally as she asked, “What’s going to happen now Dean?”
He honestly didn’t know what was his next step. He replied, “I don’t know Jo. I’m lost right now”.
Joanna turned in his arms, looking up at him, “I think you need to talk to Castiel”.
He swallowed, “What if he doesn’t want to talk to me?”
Jo smiled sadly, “Then that’s something you will have to accept”.
“What about my kids Jo? I don’t know if I can stop thinking about them now that I know they’re mine”.
Jo aimed sympathetic eyes at him, “I’m sorry Dean but all I can say is that Castiel calls the shots. He has been with the kids all their lives and I think that it’s only fair he decide”. She bites her lip, “He knows that you know Dean….That’s a start”.
“I don’t want to pressure him”, he admitted.
“I know Dean. And that is why you wait to see if he comes to you first then you talk, apologize”. She slowly dislodged herself from his grasp, “As for now, I think I’ll be spending a week at my parents. I need time to process that my fiancé has kids”.
He felt this hollowness dig itself into his chest, “I’m sorry Jo. I really am”.
She turned and smiled shakily at him, “I know Dean”. She sighed and proceeded to head towards their bedroom.
Somehow Dean knew that things were not going to be ok.
And he deserved every damn bad luck that came his way.
Every damn one.
A/N: Comments and kudos feed my soul and inspire me to write..Please tell me what you think or feel about this chapter :)
A long chapter for you readers...
Hope it's satisfactory to an extent...
He was in the middle of making a sandwich for his boys lunch when he heard knocking on his front door. Of course before he could act, the pitter patter of hurried little feet could be heard. As he made his way to their door he called out, “Ryder! Roman! Don’t answer the door without papa!”
It was a rule he always enforced with his boys.
However, he found he was too late. Ryder and Roman had already answered the door and were now in a bubbly conversation with Dean Winchester who was crouched down on eye level with the boys. It would’ve been a cute scene to see his son’s giggling at whatever Dean said but at this moment in time, it really wasn’t.
All he felt was this surge of protectiveness engulf him, making him stomp towards the little group, he scolded lightly, “Roman and Ryder. What did papa tell you about answering the door?” He added with an unamused glint aimed at Dean, “And about talking to strangers?”
He watched as Dean read the message loud and clear, instantly standing up and shoving his hands into his pockets. A deep seated look of uncertainty staining the man’s features.
Roman apologized, “We sorry papa”.
Ryder then announced as if to make things better, “And Mr. Inchester is not a stranger papa! He our neighbor!”
He raised a brow at his son, folding his arms along his chest. His son did have a point but as far as he was concerned Dean Winchester was a still a stranger to his son’s. And with what the man now knew, he wasn’t going to allow Dean to communicate or say things that might confuse his boys. He stated, “Say bye to Mr. Winchester and go back to your coloring”.
The boys must have seen that he was serious because both nodded instantly saying ‘bye’ to Dean and making their way past him. His eyes still trained on them as he announced, “And we will be having a chat soon about the rules boys”.
“Ok papa”, The boys replied in unison before disappearing.
He aimed Dean a scrutinizing look, “I don’t appreciate you speaking to my kids without my presence Dean and most importantly without my approval”.
Deans ears turned red, “I’m sorry Cas. That won’t happen again”.
“What can I help you with?!” He said a little abruptly. To be honest he was a little weary of Dean showing up like this.
The man’s green eyes met his, “Um I was wondering if we could talk?”
“Talk about what Dean?” He asked with a searching look, “I have nothing to say to you”.
“No but I do Castiel. I just….I need a moment of your time please”, Dean pleaded. A genuine look gracing the man’s features.
He was contemplating kicking the man’s ass off the entrance to his apartment but he wasn’t that crass. He really should be sending the man back to his apartment but a part of him was curious to hear what Dean Winchester was thinking or whatever. His jaw ticked, “Fine but we talk in my kitchen. I’m making lunch for my boys”.
Dean nodded, a grateful look gracing his features, “Thank you Castiel”.
“Don’t take this as a gesture that I have forgiven you or that everything is ok. It’s not”, He clarified. He wanted Dean to know where he stood.
“Ok Cas”, Dean nodded.
“It’s Castiel”, he corrected. The man had no right to be using the shortened version of his name. He indicated, “Come in”.
The apartment rooms weren’t different from he and Jo’s, however, it had a warm feeling to it. There were pictures of a happy Castiel with the boys hanging on the walls along the hallway. Every once in a while he would trip lightly over some squishy toys or legos’. But the one that stole or broke his heart further was the picture right at the end of the hallway in a heart shaped frame with two little light blonde haired babies dressed in blue onesies. They were so tiny and had blonde hair when born. He found himself unconsciously asking, “How old were they in this picture?”
He looked to Castiel whose eyes were now fixed on the picture, a soft genuine smile taking shape on the blue eyed man’s face, fondness in Castiels tone as he answered, “They were a month old. I had a professional photographer capture a few shots”.
“They grow up fast huh?”
Castiels eyes shot to his, piercing into his as if wanting to study his soul. And boy did that make him a little self conscious. The blue eyed man’s features now stoic as he replied, “The kitchen’s this way”.
He watched as the man walked away without a second glance. He closes his eyes briefly and followed without a single glance anywhere or a single word uttered.
Castiel indicated for him to take a seat by the island. The man asked him, “Can I get you something to drink? Orange juice, water, tea, coffee or milk? I don’t keep beer in the house”.
He nodded his agreement, “Um water is fine thanks”. In all honesty, he just wanted something to hold so he could try and channel his anxiety.
He was handed a glass of water. The solid glass under his palms grounded him. He cleared his throat, “Thank you Castiel”.
Castiel just nodded before he began working on what looked like ham and cheese sandwiches with lettuce and tomatoes. He knew Castiel wasn’t going to utter another word so it was time for him to step up.
He nibbled on his bottom lip, before he said, “Thank you once again Castiel for allowing me to talk to you”.
“Even if you don’t deserve my attention and time”, Castiel replied without raising his head as the man worked on laying the tomatoes properly on a sandwich.
Ouch that was a good kick in the nuts.
He deserved it though.
He swallowed, “Um yeah especially when I don’t deserve it”.
Castiel finally lets out a tired sigh, blue eyes meeting his, “Please get to the point Dean”.
Christ those eyes made the hollowness in his chest grow. He thumbed at his glass nervously, before aiming Castiel a careful look, “First, I’d like to apologize Castiel”. He huffed, “I know I don’t deserve any forgiveness from you and I fully respect that. I…I left you”.
“You abandoned me Dean. Threw me to the wolves and watched me get eaten alive with a proud smile on your face”.
He swallowed, heart palpitating even faster and feeling much more bashful and guilty due to the steel blue look Castiel now aimed him. He nodded, “Yes. I did and nothing can ever change that. And I had to live with the pain and hurt after”.
“And what about me Dean? Did you ever think of the pain and hurt I had to live with? Better yet, did you ever think of me at all while you were trying to please your father?!” Castiel grit out.
Christ why does he have to keep saying the wrong things?!
He replied calmly but his throat was tightening and his eyes were threatening to start collecting tears, “Cas-..Castiel I did think of you”.
Castiel let out a mocking laugh, “Yeah right Dean”. He laid out a little sarcastically, “Is that why I didn't get any calls or texts from you? Is that why you never replied when I left you a voicemail saying I was pregnant with your child?!”
“You left a voicemail?” Dean tried to think back, face scrunching up his confusion.
All was silent until Castiel scoffed, “Unbelievable. Maybe your old man beat you to it Dean?”
He swallowed, “Maybe Castiel”. More guilt and self loathing filled him up, “I abandoned my phone a week after I left”.
“Well I sent you a message 3 days after you left Dean”. Castiel mouth was set in a straight line, his arms folded across his chest while he shook his head in disbelief, “Looks like daddy Winchester was a snobby old bastard aye”.
He had washed his hands off his dad a year back when Jo finally called his father out as a hypocritical self absorbed over controlling asshole who liked to ruin his children’s lives. So that opened his eyes some and he really didn’t care if anyone outright condemned his father in front of him anymore. The man had put him through hell. He replied, “Yes he is Castiel”. He added, “If I had known that you were pregnant, I would have come back, I swear”.
“No Dean you wouldn’t have because you were still listening to your dad’s orders!”
He swallowed the lump in his throat, “Castiel I’m sorry, please understand”.
Castiel slapped a palm onto the island top, startling him and shutting him up instantly. He watched as a flit of emotions worked its way through the blue eyed man’s face. The glassiness in Castiels eyes only told him that the man was trying to hold off tears. And his heart broke further, he wanted to hold Castiel in his arms securely but he knew he had no right.
After a moment’s silence Castiel’s cloudy eyes bore into his. The man’s voice almost draining as he said, “Dean I am not going to blame you for not being here when I was pregnant because evidently you had no clue till this day but not facing up to your dad for the love that we had was and is what I am upset and heartbroken about. That’s why I can’t forgive you yet”. The man thumbed at the bridge of his nose, “I have been through so much Dean. So much. I have built a happy life for me and my boys. I am not ready to have someone just tear it down. I won’t allow that”. Castiel said the last bit quite firmly and with determination.
“Castiel I’m not here to tear your life apart, I promise. Even after finding out about the boys. You have every right to keep them away from me”. He said the last sentence a little sadly, eyes glancing down at his fiddling fingers that had now abandoned the glass.
Castiel next words were quiet that he almost missed it. “Will you ever want to know your kids Dean if given the chance?”
Deans eyes shot to Castiels conflicted ones. His own tears now filling his eyes, muttering, “If given the chance, I will take it”.
Castiel nodded, “Give me some time to think about this Dean. And in the meantime you are still Mr. Winchester to them”.
That stung Dean more than anything but he knew Castiel called the shots and the man had every right to make choices that would benefit his children. A choice that is massive. He agreed, “Take as much time as you need Castiel and know that I won't force you”. He swallowed, “Can I ask you one question though?”
“What is it Dean?”
“If you were to give an asshole like me a chance to get to know the kids, what would the reason be?”
Castiel just glanced at him with clouds of emotions in his eyes before admitting, “Because it’s not about us anymore Dean. It’s not about our happiness, it’s about theirs”.
Dean pondered those deep words, even after he left a few minutes later.
It’s not about our happiness anymore, it’s about theirs.
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One week later…
Jo found him huddled on the couch with a thin cover wrapped around himself. The TV was on but he wasn’t paying attention, staring blankly at the screen. He didn’t even acknowledge her.
He felt the couch dip beside him. A quiet sigh coming out of his fiancés mouth, “Dean what’s going on?” She lightly pressed her palm onto his forearm.
The warmth of her delicate hand not soothing him like it’s supposed to. After a moments silence, he scrummaged enough strength to utter in an almost quiet voice, “It’s been a week”. His voice faltering at the end.
“It’s been a week since what Dean?” Her voice curious and probing.
His heart squeezed, choking out, “It’s been a week since I’ve last heard from Castiel or seen the boys”.
There was a hint of disappointment in her voice. He knew that the disappointment was aimed at him through her clipped words, “Dean what did you expect?”
He shrugged, “Dunno. Guess I was just expecting more”. Huh! Who was he kidding? He deserved to be ignored. He finally spared a glance at Jo. He wished he didn’t when he was met with a look of disbelief.
Jo frowned, arms folded across her chest, head tilted to the side with squinted eyes, “How can Castiel give you more when you all but let him down in the past Dean?”
Oh boy was that another kick to the sack. Spot on!
Not that he didn’t expect that reaction albeit he was quite surprised that Jo wasn’t ranting off about him not missing her instead. He swallowed, facing the TV again, a coca cola commercial going on, “Yeah I guess you’re right”.
She let out another heavy sigh, “Dean. Did you tell Castiel everything that happened back then? Did you tell Castiel about how your dad threatened to end his life if you didn’t comply? How you had to make things believable in front of your dad to really show him that you were done with him?”
He shook his head that signified a silent ‘no I didn’t’. Then a thought came to him, turning to face Jo with creased forehead and furrowed brows, “Wait. Why does it matter to you? I mean shouldn’t you be telling me to stay away from at least Castiel?” His eyes taking in her calm look but the slight sadness in her eyes was evident.
She bit at her lips, eyes finally dropping to her lap, “Because I’ve been doing some thinking Dean and I feel that we should probably call off the engagement”.
Dread instantly consumed him, heart plummeting to the pits of his tummy, tears filling his eyes as he shook his head, “No Jo”. He made a grab for her hands, “We can work this out please?” Desperation evident in his voice.
A tear finally slipped down Jo’s face, “Dean I came here with the intention of salvaging our relationship but after seeing you so down and distraught over someone who isn’t me made me realize that it wasn’t going to be fair on both of us. That we would be living in a lie, trying to ignore the elephant in the room”.
He swallowed, mind still trying to process Jo’s words, “What elephant Jo?”
She smiled shakily at him, resting a palm atop his, a tear cascading down her cheek, “That I’m not the one you were missing Dean?” She sniffled, “Now the pieces have finally fallen into place. Now I finally understand why our relationship didn’t feel so right all these years”. She exhaled, glassy eyes boring into his own tear filled ones, “Your heart belonged to someone else Dean”.
For the first time in his life, he felt like an open book. However, he felt naked and dissected. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling. And all of it had to do with the broken look of the beautiful blonde before him. All his insecurities came flooding back in like a massive tidal wave plunging onto land, killing or destroying all in its wake. All he found himself asking in a drained voice was, “So what does this mean for us Jo?”
“It means that I am going to go to our bedroom and pack whatever I have left”, she replied in a very shaky tone while she tried to keep herself in check. “It means that I am moving into my parent’s place until I find an apartment for myself to move into and start afresh”.
He murmured, “You’re breaking up with me”. He could feel the wall he had built around his heart finally crumble.
Jo smiled shakily, “Dean I am giving you a new start. I’m showing you a path that no one else has in your entire life. One that you must face boldly”.
“I don’t want to lose you Jo”, he gave one final plea.
The blonde squeezed his hands in hers, “You won’t lose me Dean. I will always be there for you whenever you need me. But only as a friend”. She licked her lips, “Dean please know that I do love you and that’s why I need to let you go”.
“And what if down the line, we find out that we are actually meant to be?”
“Then we can always give things another shot but for the time being we both need to get ourselves on track and find out what we really want”.
His heart swelled for the woman before him. She was exquisite and extraordinary. He found himself saying, “You know I don’t deserve someone like you Jo. You’re too good for an asshole like me.
She ran a palm down his tear stained cheek, a fondness in her tone, “You are not an asshole Dean. You have just been surrounded by too much negativity from a tender age and in the process lost your way. People deserve chances Dean, but you must prove yourself. You must earn it or you will find yourself corrupted and lost again very easily”.
He nodded, whispering, “Ok Jo”. He knew that the road was going to be a windy one but he must try. For what, he isn’t sure yet.
His heart squeezed when she got up, laying a soft kiss on the center of his forehead before he watched her head for their bedroom. Soon his bedroom. Somehow, he felt conflicted yet settled. It was a feeling that was quite weird for him, flirting with his emotions. He didn’t know how long he JUST SAT there with his thoughts running wild and all over the place. Too fast for him to place a finger on it.
He was startled out of his reverie when Jo called out, “Dean, it’s time for me to go”. He looked in her direction to find her with two large carry bags. He immediately got up, “Let me help you”. He reached for a bag only for her to shake her head in disagreement.
She finally aimed him a smirk that didn’t quite reach her eyes, “I’m not made of glass Dean”.
He chuckled lightly but there was no humor, “Yeah I remember”. She could put any man to shame.
He followed her to the door, opening it for her to allow her to step outside without any hassles. She turned to face him with an almost sad look, “I will come back for my other things when you’re at work. I think it’s for the best”. Right he was starting at his uncle Rufus’ garage tomorrow. She whispered, “Goodbye Dean”.
“Bye Jo”, He said with such heaviness in his heart as he watched her walk to the elevator, pressing the arrow down.
The elevator dinged and opened, allowing her to step inside, turning to face him with a smile, “Hey Dean?”
“Tell him the truth. Tell Castiel everything”.
Once again, his tears cascaded down his cheeks, watching the elevator doors close shut. He murmured to himself, “Ok Jo. Ok”.
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Castiel and the boys go to the Pie Carnival...The boys are just too cute...
The next time he had spoken to Dean was at the Pie Carnival, two weeks later.
Yes they had a special carnival in Sioux Falls just for people to display their different flavored or varieties of pie for the public to buy or sample. Of course there was the traditional rides, music and kids bouncy castles.
The day was mainly a family fun filled day with the occasional childless couples, overly affectionate teens, singles and a few elderly.
All in all, everyone was welcome.
It was a work free Saturday so he decided to take the boys to the Pie Carnival. Roman had been talking non-stop about the ingredients to a perfect apple pie while Ryder was just complaining about how hungry his stomach was for Blue Berry Pie. This has been going on from the moment the boys found out where they were going; from the apartment throughout the drive to the carnival.
If he wasn’t so used to his boys’ very talkative nature, he would have probably gone mad.
But then again he wouldn’t ask for anything else. He loved his children wholly to the moon, universe and beyond. Their voices and laughter like a sweet symphony to his ears and was his only addictive drug.
And that meant his children were at the forefront of every decision he made in his life and their happiness always came before his.
But sometimes before allowing happiness to settle in, a few tough choices have to be made.
And that’s why he held each of the boy’s hands and approached a still oblivious Dean who was receiving a whole round tray of apple pie from the stout lady who had sold it to him. He watched as Dean sniffed at the pie letting out a sigh of content.
He couldn’t help the smile that graced his lips as he watched Dean’s face appear childlike and excited as he studied the pie in his hand. That Christmas has come early face was always contagious to him.
He broke out of his current daydream when Ryder and Roman started yanking on his hands, apparently spotting Dean and now were tag teaming and pulling him forward towards their daddy with bright faces. Faces that seriously reminded him of Deans.
Both boys not wasting any time, yelling, “Mr. Inchester! Mr. Inchester!”
He watched as Dean stood stalk still, gaping like a fish out of water. He picked up the way the man’s eyes shot down to take in the kids’ faces with a newly acquired softness and a tiny smile before his ex’s green eyes, the exact replica of his kids eyes, met his. And he was instantly gob-smacked by the cloud of emotions swirling within. He was almost at a loss for words, almost, managing to utter, “Dean?” And yeah that definitely came out sounding confused and like a question.
That seemed to break Dean’s focus from him to the ground and then to his feet before the man dug a hand into the front pocket of his jeans, putting on a somewhat shaky smile, eyes meeting his once more, “Hey Cas”. The man had the curtesy to wave at the boys with a smile, “Hey boys!” Before hesitant green eyes flicked back up to his. He knew that Dean was probably thinking of the ‘you don’t speak to my sons’ without my permission or presence rule’ that he had authorized two weeks ago when Dean came knocking on his door.
It took all the strength of the muscles on his cheeks to smile lightly, “Hello Dean”. To break a little awkwardness he turned to his beautiful boys whose eyes were only fixed on one thing, the pies littered on the sweet smiling stout ladies table. God they really were starting to develop Dean’s fascination for pie. Is it a genetic thing? He cleared his throat, “Boys, say hello to Mr. Dean”.
“Hi Mr. Inchester!” The replied in unison instead of Mr. Dean.
He nodded in Dean’s direction, hoping to convey his permission to talk to the boys proper. Apparently Dean was good at picking up non-verbal cues as usual, the man’s whole demeanor changed to one of younger joy, “Hey! How are you today?” He watched as Dean crouched down to meet the boys at eye level, pie still resting on one hand.
He wanted to roll his eyes when his boys studied the pie with hunger and excitement in their eyes. He shook his head, crouching down beside the twins who were on the verge of dropping drool down their chins, “Boys!” He said in a disapproving tone that broke his boys out of their ogling. Works every time.
He could see Dean trying to hold in a chuckle at the boys mannerisms. They were so obvious, it was inevitable. The boys both responding, “Yes papa!” As if they hadn’t been staring at the pie, well come to see it the boys were shuffling on their feet, trying not to look at the pie in Deans hand. Oh they tried so hard.
He tried to suppress his own smirk at their own innocence. He cleared his throat, “What did papa say about staring at food in other people’s hands?”
Roman answered perkily, “That it’s rude to stare”.
Ryder interjecting a little abruptly, “And if we want some food then all we needs to do is go up to them and asks them for it!” Unbelievable!
Roman beat him to a reply, eyes wide and aimed at his twin, squeaking, “What?!” His littlest had the nerve to fold his arms along his chest, tapping his foot insistently on the ground, shaking his head, “Ryder we can’t always ask someone to give us food because YOU like it! We can’t ask strangers!”
“But Mr. Inchester is not a stranger!”
“I know that!” Roman turned his brother by maneuvering him to face towards a clown probably on a lunch break chewing on a hotdog, pointing, “He’s eating a yummy hotdog! Doesn’t mean we should go and ask him for it!” Then Roman placed his hands on his hips, looking every bit serious, “And where’s Please?”
“When you ask someone for something, you has to say please! That’s what papa says!” Roman was relentless in his argument.
Of course his little one was going to dissect the words that Ryder uttered. His eyes met Deans surprised ones that seemed to hold questions. He needed to get a control of this situation, “Boys?” Still they were bickering back and forth now on the topic of which superhero was better; Ryder’s Batman or Roman’s Superman? He raised a confused brow at Dean who just shrugged. How did the conversation change from food to superheroes? And from what he could hear now, they boys were now bickering about Tomatoes in Sandwiches; Roman says tomatoes goes perfect with cheese and Ryder saying he likes it with ham. His kids were going to give him a whiplash soon. He shook his head, placing a hand on each of their chests, firmly saying, “Boys! That’s enough!”
Instant quiet with puppy eyes aimed at him.
He shook his head, “Nuh-uh we will talk about arguing with your siblings when we get home as well as a reminder on proper mannerisms. As for now, no more arguments or bickering. It’s not nice”. He added, “Now hug each other and say you’re sorry”.
“Ok papa”, both boys replied, giggling as they hugged one another.
He spared a glance at Dean who was smiling softly at him with this doe eyed look that didn’t make the butterflies flutter in his belly. No freaken way! He was still pissed at Dean! He and Dean both stood up, he said, “Um we just wanted to say hi and I was going to purchase a slice of pie each for the boys”.
He could hear his sons giggling away, once again playful. Then he watched as Dean raised his hand with the pie in it, “How about we take this pie to one of the tables under the trees and slice it up instead? We can all find out how this apple pie tastes like?” He could read the slight fear in Deans eyes laced with uncertainty. The man knew it was a big ask.
It was just pie. And for the boys. Not his, not Dean’s happiness.
He would put up with Dean for his sons sakes. How or when he would slowly ease his boys into the information of Dean being their biological father, he didn’t know. He knew it would have to be slow and with time. And this was one of the very small steps he had to make.
He nodded, “Very well Dean. For pie and happy conversations. That’s it”. He uttered just high enough for Dean to pick up the warning in his tone.
Dean read the message loud and clear, nodding, “Thank you Cas”.
He tore his eyes from Dean’s gaze, plastering on a smile, “Hey boys who wants to share Mr. Winchester’s apple pie under the oak tree!”
Both boys lit up in such joy, squealing in unison while jumping excitedly, “Me! Me!”
And that beyond happy look on his boys faces was the reason he made the choices he made.
He only hoped it was the right one.
Please comments and kudos as it helps inspire me to keep writing ♡♡♡
Sorry for the late update...been real busy....
AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO MY WONDERFUL READERS!!!!!
And it’s confirmed; the boys were just like their father Dean.
They gobbled their slices of pie while letting out moans and sighs of content. And they means Dean too. On the other hand, he hadn’t even eaten into half of his slice of apple pie because he was more fixated on trying to connect his sons’ similarities to Dean in all manners of the term.
He started with his oldest, Ryder. The kid was a complete miniature version of Dean from the way he stuffed food into his mouth- as if it would disappear, to the way his little one grinned goofily at his big slice of pie, to the way he sometimes chewed with an open mouth- which he had to tell his son to close, to the way he cackled followed by a moan when he chewed on his pie and to the confidence exuberated by his son.
Then his eyes shifted to his youngest, Roman. He had to admit that his son had a lot of his qualities such as the way he upheld proper eating etiquette, to the way he took a bite of his pie before placing it down on his plate as he focused on chewing what was already in his mouth-though today was a little fast paced, to the way he was confident but at the same time mindful of how or what to do in certain situations. As for Dean’s traits, his son may seem shy but oh boy was he a force to be reckoned with- in others terms he had his father’s anger and temperament, also his father’s love for pie definitely reflected off him.
He reckons that his sons’ are pretty square in the looks department- carrying both he and Deans features equally.
Thank heavens for that.
He was startled out of his thoughts when a throat cleared, “Um Castiel are you ok?”
He blinked at a curious Dean, still a little fazed as he replied, “Huh?”
Dean gestured to his plate still filled with three quarter of his slice of pie, “It’s just you haven’t even eaten much of your pie? I hope it tastes fine?”
He resisted the urge to give himself a palm to the forehead, “Oh yeah the pie is great Dean. I was just…..I just have a lot on my mind”.
Dean’s eyes reflected sympathy as the man acknowledged with a careful nod, “Ok Cas-Castiel”. He knew that Dean probably figured not to probe further lest he face his wrath. Good move.
Ryder decided to interrupt their little conversation by tapping his hand, “Papa!”
He tore his eyes away from Dean to look at the beautiful bright green….puppy eyes….dimples…..oh no….of his oldest. He dragged out, “Yeah Ryder?”
“You gonna finish your pie or not? If not, can I have it?”
Before he could remind his son about the proper sentence structures and polite words his littlest decided to jump in, with a loud, “Dang it Ryder! It’s ‘going to’ not ‘gonna’ and you’re supposed to say ‘please’!”
Castiel face palmed. He needed to talk to Charlie about using ‘dang it’ in front of his boys.
Almost instantly the boys started to bicker back and forth. He sighed looking tiredly at Dean who once again aimed sympathetic eyes at him. With age the boys were starting to get even more talkative and very much intelligent. He loved it but it always had its moments. He once again firmly stated, “Boys enough please!’
The boys looked at him with puppy eyes and deep dimpled cheeks, responding in unison, “Yes papa”.
To his surprise, Ryder apologized, “I’m sorry papa for not saying please”.
Castiel couldn’t help but smile proudly at his son, “You’re forgiven sonny. Thank you for apologizing”. He sliced his leftover pie in half handing each to his boys, “Now finish that for papa”.
The boys Christmas has come early faces were in place as they stared at the pie as if it were gold.
Both Dean and he chuckled as they watched the boys dig in quite enthusiastically.
“The boys definitely got a tummy on them huh?” Dean muttered just enough for them to hear.
Castiel shrugged sparing him a glance, “They definitely got that appetite from you”.
Dean’s whole face lit up, eyes holding a cloud of emotions. The man swallowed and glanced over with eyes full of love and wonder to his sons’, murmuring, “That they do”.
His heart stuttered and warmed at the tenderness Dean aimed at his boys. It was a sight to behold.
He whispered loud enough for Dean to hear, “You should ask them what their favorite superhero’s are, if you’re looking for a way to strike up a conversation with them”. He smiled at the thankful looking man before him, “They love talking about superhero’s and Harry Potter”.
He knew he shouldn’t be too bothered but the happiness on Dean’s face was worth the little detail.
“I loves batman!” Ryder stated with bulging eyes.
“And I loves superman!” Roman put his both hands up in the air in praise.
Dean smiled heartily at the pair, “Well I think that both your superheros are real cool”.
“Really!” Ryder beamed.
“Which superhero do you like Mr. Inchester?!” Roman probed.
In order to avoid biasness, Dean replied, “I like superman and batman. I think they are both pretty cool in their own way”.
Castiel smiled at Dean. Dean was always team batman.
Ryder tilted his head to the side, “Since I’m Batman and Roman is superman, which means you have to be Robin”.
Roman pouted, “Why does he gets to be your sidekick and not mines?”
Ryder folded his arms across his chest, “Because Superman doesn’t have a sidekick duh!”
“Yeah! And Batman can’t fly!” Roman pokes his tongue out at Ryder.
Ryder was relentless and refused to give up, blurting out, “Yeah! Well superman wears his underwear outside!”
Dean’s eyes shot to Castiels in panic. Castiel would have chuckled at the man’s reaction on not knowing how to handle his kids had it not been for the boys once again engaged in an argument. All he had to do this time was clear his throat and aim the boys a stern look that had them suddenly quiet and blushing.
“Sorry papa”, Roman apologized.
“Yeah sorry papa”, Ryder parroted.
Castiel smiled, “Thank you for apologizing sweethearts. Papa wants to tell you both that you need to respect each other’s opinions and that-“ He glanced at Dean, “and that Mr. Inchester can choose to be any superhero he wants to be”. He caught Dean’s thankful look before he focused back on curious greens, “We have to allow Mr. Winchester to choose what he wants because everybody has freedom of choice. Ok?”
The boys nodded, “Ok papa”.
Roman asked, “What superhero do you want to be Mr. Inchester?”
Dean chuckled while scratching the back of his head, “Is it ok if I think about it and tell you boys later?”
“Ok”. The boys say in unison.
“Great”, Dean beamed before looking to Castiel for guidance.
It was clear that Dean was new to the whole parenting thing and that he was very unclear on how to approach his boys. Well his boys were very vocal and perceptive too, hence probably a little intimidating for Dean. He was guessing the man didn’t want to bring up anything that would cause the boys to start arguing.
It was very nice of Dean actually.
Maybe the boys needed to engage in a little activity so he clapped his hands together, “How about we go try win some stuffed animals?”
“Yeah!” Both boys cheered.
He glanced at Dean, “Would you like to accompany us Dean?”
“Yeah please come with us Mr. Inchester!” Roman pleaded.
“Yeah please Mr. Inchester!” Ryder followed with his own enthusiasm.
Castiel could see Dean’s eyes water up a little before the man shakily laughed, “Yes sure boys, I’d like to accompany you”.
Both boys squealed in delight making both he and Dean laugh.
Castiel believed though it had been a shaky start for Dean; it’s a good start anyway.
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Sorry for the late one my lovelies.
Hope you enjoy this chapter...more developments :)
Two Teddy Bears. Two Dolphins. One Batman. One Superman.
Dean won the Teddy Bears. Castiel won the Dolphins. Ryder managed to win superman whilst Roman won batman. Of course the boys exchanged to their favourite superheroes. Naturally, they got a dolphin and teddy bear each, insisting Mr. Inchester and papa hold on to one of each.
Then they visited bouncy castles, had a serve of ice cream each and roamed the grounds.
Then Castiel witnessed something remarkable directly after the boys had their chance to jump around in the bouncy castle. If it hadn’t happened before him, he would have accused Dean of forcing his sons to comply.
But before anything, he had seen Ryder and Roman holding hands, climbing out the bouncy castle while whispering and giggling. He kept mum and observed the boys skip right up to Dean and asked in unison, “Can we hold your hand Mr. Inchester?”
Dean’s eyes shot to Castiel's, eyes slightly shocked and questioning. Deep inside Castiel knew this was his boys trusting Dean at their own momentum and that was in it’s own way, progress. Don’t get him wrong, he is a little afraid but that was just a normal reaction towards your babies wanting to hold the hand of the man who once betrayed all of them. This was not about him, it was about Roman and Ryder.
He reached out his free arm, a smile in place, “Hand me your Teddy Bear, Dolphin, batman and superman Dean so you can grab a hold of their hands".
Dean’s eyes raked over Castiel’s Teddy Bear and dolphin, asking, “Castiel, maybe we should put this into the car before we explore more? I mean they are quite big".
He knew Dean had a point. He couldn’t walk around carrying all the stuffy toys lest his path is blinded. He nodded, “Ok Dean. We are not far from my car”. Castiel grabbed his boys hands, “Come on sweethearts, let’s put your prizes in the car, then you can both hold Dean’s hands. Ok”
Both boys eyes lit up, “Ok!” They each grabbed a stuffy toy and all headed towards the car.
Castiel’s heart melted when the boys both grabbed a hand each of Dean's. He could see that Dean was trying to hold back his overwhelming surge of emotions, eyes glassy and smile wobbly. He knew that this right here was a genuine response from the man and it only made him feel better. Dean wasn’t faking.
Then another heart wrenching thing happened. Roman grabbed his hand (now sandwiched between Castiel and Dean), “Come on papa! You can join us in holding hands too!”
His eyes bore into Dean’s for a second. He could see the man was feeling very self conscious and just as scared as he. He needed to be strong for his sons, it was an innocent request after all. He wouldn’t deny his babies any form of happiness. He nodded at Dean before smiling down at his son, “Ok Roman”.
And so they walked all interlinked, hand in hand.
“Papa! Look! Puppies!” Roman squealed, jumping up and down between he and Dean in excitement.
Meanwhile, Ryder did the same from Dean’s left, squeaking, “And kitties!”
There before he and Dean was a high white closed tent. The signboard read Animal Shelter Adoption. And coming out were families cradling kittens, pups, cats or walking big dogs that looked happy to be adopted into a new forever home.
“Can we goes and sees it Mr. Inchester?!” Roman surprisingly asked Dean.
Dean chuckled and replied, “You will have to ask your papa champ".
“Papa please!” Ryder added.
Oh crap! Now he was faced with not two but THREE puppy green eyed orbs with the added set of dimples from his sons. Curse the Winchester puppy eyed, doe eyed, deep dimpled look!
“Aww those boys are so adorable!” Someone from the crowd commented.
He knew that entering the animal shelter could make the boys want a pup or cat. It was risky and he had to weigh his options. He uttered, “Boys I don’t think we should".
“Papa please!” Ryder pleaded.
“Please papa with the cherries on top!” Roman started blinking his eyes- the way aunty Charlie showed them. Damnit Charlie!
His eyes shot to Dean’s and the man just freaken smiled. He knew he was sold.
He sighed, “Ok”.
“Yay!” Both boys jumped up and down once more before they started pulling them towards the entrance.
He held the boys back, “Nuh-uh!” He knelt down before the boys, seeing Dean do the same which he nodded at Dean gratefully for. He looked eye level at his sons, “Firstly a few conditions. One, behave. Two, we will only be having a look at the animals, so we will not be adopting any. Ok?”
“But why?” Roman asked sadly.
This is exactly what Castiel wanted to avoid. He replied, “Because we can’t sonny. We don't have a big enough space at home. Maybe when you are a little older and we get a bigger place than papa can adopt a little pup or kitty for you boys. Just not today. Ok?”
Ryder hugged his brother, “Its ok Roman. One day papa will gets us a puppy".
Sometimes he is awed by how caring his eldest is. Yes Ryder could be a tough stubborn person but when it came to Roman, he could be the sweetest and gentlest. He glanced at Dean and saw the man's attention focused on the boys. His gaze filled with fondness and pride. He knew because that’s the way he felt right this moment.
Roman hugged Ryder back while Castiel and Dean rubbed his back, fingers brushing and making them look at one another. Castiel’s heart was pounding and knew that the sparks that travelled up his fingers were real. He wondered if Dean felt it too? He smiled at the man who returned the smile back and with that smile was another look Castiel recognized from past memories and experience.
Dean was hatching a plan.
He raised a brow at Dean who just winked and said, “You know boys, I was actually planning on getting a pet for myself since I'm staying on my own now".
“Really!” Both boys squealed excitedly.
Dean replied just as enthusiastically, “Yup! I was thinking a golden retriever or any other pup if there is no retriever up for adoption.”
The boys eyes went even rounder. Roman clapped excitedly, “Oh boy! They’re so fluffy!”
“Yes they are!” For the first time, Dean then directed a daring question to him, “Castiel. If you want, I can bring the pup over to yours to play with the boys for a while? If you’ll have it of course”.
“Yeah papa please!” Both boys asked in unison.
And that happiness was contagious. He admired Dean for taking such a step and he knew deep down the man was doing this for his sons. To him that was amazing and one point for Dean. He replied, “I think that’s fine”. He and Dean chuckled lightly when the boys started yapping away excitedly.
While the boys continued having a boisterous conversation, he asked Dean, “I hope your fiance will be ok with this?”
Dean smiled sadly, “I wouldn’t know. We aren’t together anymore”.
And instead of happiness, Castiel felt heartbroken for the man. He quickly responded, “I’m sorry Dean”.
Dean nodded, “Thank you Castiel”.
Castiel gnawed at his bottom lip, giving great thought to what he was going to suggest. He asked, “Um maybe, if you'd like, I can bring the boys over to your place and they can just play with the pup in your home?” He quickly added, “If that’s ok of course?”
For the first time in a long time, Castiel witnessed Dean’s heart throbbing pearly white full smile that he had fallen in love with. And it made him feel warm.
The man replied, “I would love that Castiel!”
Castiel cleared his throat as he tried to will down his fluttering heart, “Great! I or Charlie will accompany the boys over. You can set up a schedule of when you’re home and we can work with that. Yeah?”
Dean now looked on the verge of tears, voice shaky as he laughed, “Thank you Castiel. I really appreciate this opportunity".
“You earned this opportunity Dean”, He replied honestly.
It was the truth.
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He could say the most popular highlight of his life to date was getting the opportunity to spend the day with his sons. The second, was experiencing how joyful his sons were when the twins finally spotted the puppy they wanted to adopt.
The pup was very much enthusiastic and jubilant as it ran up to the boys. Roman and Ryder were squealing where they lay on the ground and the pup slobbered and licked at their faces.
The black and white pup with cerulean blue eyes seemed content and snug on Roman’s lap. Meanwhile, Ryder shot he and Castiel the biggest puppy eyes, “Can we has him?”
“Can we has him PLEASE?!” Roman corrected.
The boys puppy eyed look reminded him so much of his brother Sam. That meant he was sold. He spared a glance at Cas to see the blue eyed beauty smile fondly at his boys before the mans eyes caught his. Within them a secret approval passed.
He smiled and nodded before crouching down joined by Cas.
He reached out and rubbed the side of the pups head with gentleness. Meanwhile, Ryder cuddled up to his papa watching with a smile at he and the pups interaction.
He dropped his hand and saw the pup tilt its head to the side studying him with its cerulean blues for a few seconds as if contemplating whether or not he was a friend or foe. Then in an instant the pup scrambled out of Roman's arms right up to him, standing on its hind paws while its front paws rested on his lap, tongue rolling out and tail wagging furiously as its bright eyes met his.
He chuckled while the boys giggled. He rubbed the top of the pups head in affection, heart swelling, saying, “Hey little one. You’re such a cute little boy huh". He laughed as the pup let out a tiny bark in reply, tail wagging even more excitedly. His eyes met Roman, Ryders and then Castiel’s, “Well I think this little pup-" He carried the pup and cuddled him close, “This little fella would be awesome to have around. Let’s keep him then".
Both boys squealed excitedly while he and Cas just smiled warmly at one another.
The animal shelter personnel set up the paper work that was soon signed. He had ensured to give more than the little fee required to take the pup home.
The boys eyes were lit in wonder and excitement when the shelter personnel handed the leash over to him.
The animals activist smiled and crouched down to meet the boys at eye level, “So boys do you want to know what breed your pup is?”
The boys shrugged. Roman asked enthusiastically, “What is it Mr. ?”
“Well he's a husky".
The boys let out an adorable loud and bugged eyed, Wow!
Roman turned to look up at him, “Do you hear that Mr. Inchester?!”
“I sure do bud", he now had the 2 month old pup in his arms.
“What should we names him?!” Ryder asked the activist.
The activist smiled warmly, “You can name him whatever you want kiddo. He's yours now”. The activist winked and got to his feet, shaking he and Castiel’s hands, saying bye to the boys before heading off to serve other interested customers.
He watched as Ryder and Roman whispered and mumbled quietly between each other. The two looked like they were having a tiny debate, faces morphing from frowny to sour to wide excitement as their hands flailed wildly all directions.
He just raised a questioning brow at Cas who just shrugged back and then placed a finger to his lips to tell him to let it be and to stay quiet.
He just continued to rub at the happy pups head, already feeling so connected to the little fur ball. He murmured, “You and I are going to be fine, aye bud?".
The puppy let out a little cute bark in response.
“So, I guess we have to get you a few things huh? A doggy bed, a few chew toys, dog food”. He chuckled when the puppy licked at his face, “Yeah I know sweetie. We’re going to have so much fun together".
He was startled out of his moment with the pup when Roman said, “We've reached a decision!”
Castiel asked, “Yes baby. And what decision is that?”
“A name papa!” Ryder squeaked.
He bounced the puppy lightly in his arms, “And what are you going to name him boys?”
Roman jumped excitedly, clapping, “We will name him Blue".
His heart wanted to melt completely, he looked down at the pup who was still looking up at him with those beautiful cerulean blues. He knew this pup would be so dear to him, he said, “So what do you say bud? How about we call you Blue?”
The pup instantaneously began barking, wagging its tail and licking his face in excitement. He and Castiel couldn’t help laughing while the boys giggled excitedly.
Castiel added, “I think he loves the name Blue".
He smiled at the blue eyed angel, “I agree". He then asked the boys out of curiosity, “So boys. What made you pick the name blue?”
Ryder answered, “Because his eyes are Blue like my papa's. And my papa's eyes are beautiful just like ‘Blue's' eyes are!”
“Don’t you think my papa's eyes are beautiful Mr. Inchester?” Roman asked with a tilt of his head.
His heart was thumping even harder than before. He was thankful enough that he was holding on to the pup which kind of grounded him. His tummy fluttered with butterflies and deep inside, he just couldn’t lie. He swallowed and turned to meet Castiel’s equally flustered face and....timid eyes. He found himself saying with such softness, “I think your papa's eyes are the most beautiful I have ever seen”.
He was beginning to feel scared when all Castiel did was stare blankly at him. But then a small crook of the mans lips and the twinkling of the mans eyes that bore into his made him want to melt. The blue eyed angel just smiled fully at him, cheeks pink tinged as the man said, “Thank you Dean".
Somehow, he felt that that thank you meant so much more.
He smiled and tore his eyes from Castiel’s stunning blue gaze. He glanced back to see the two boys giggling and mumbling quiet words into each others ears. He wondered what those two munchkins where discussing?
He tickled Blue’s head, “So boys. How about we go purchase a few supplies for Blue first and then take him home".
The boys squealed and jumped around excitedly.
He turned to Castiel who was smiling so handsomely. He asked, “So Castiel. Would that be ok?”
Castiel reached out to ruffle the hair on the pups head, eyes meeting his, “Yes Dean. Let’s go buy some supplies for Blue and take him home".
Home was all that ran in his thoughts.
Home was Castiel, Blue and the boys.
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Hope you'll enjoy the chapter....
Cas and Dean talk a few things out....
He couldn’t help but watch how his kids interacted with Dean. It was safe to say that Roman and Ryder were very fond of Dean. However, instead of feeling happy, a hollowness would fill up inside him. He knew everything looked fine and dandy but truth is there was still a lot he and Dean hadn’t really touched on.
Deep within him, he felt that there was more that Dean hadn’t shared with him about the night he broke up with him.
He startled when Roman squealed, “Papa come in! Blue is finally home!”
He chuckled as he was being tugged by an enthusiastic Ryder into Dean’s apartment. “Come on papa!”
He took in the interior of Dean’s apartment the moment he stepped inside. The layout wasn’t very different from his, however, it looked hollow and dull. There were still a few unpacked boxes stacked up near the couch, no pictures hung on the wall and the curtains were still pulled shut.
He watched as Dean went to draw the curtains open, apologizing, “I'm sorry. I um…I haven’t been getting around to setting the house up after Jo-". He watched Dean aim him weary eyes that absolutely shattered his heart, “Ever since Jo left".
He immediately added, “Don’t apologize Dean. I understand".
He smiled lightly when Dean shot him a grateful look. At the same moment, a tiny bark and a few squeals and giggles tore out. He and Dean watched on in fondness when the boys (who were oblivious to the lack of décor in the house) lay on the floor with Blue licking their faces and snuggling up to them with hasty waves of his little tail.
“Looks like Blue loves his new home", he commented.
Dean chuckled, “Yup. He'll love it even more when we set up his doggie bed, chew toys and food to eat”.
He smiled, “Guess you will have to potty train him now?”
Dean scrunched his nose, “Yup".
He couldn’t help but laugh at Dean’s lightbulb moment. He then crouched down, “Boys come here please?”
“Yes papa!” The boys came skipping over to stand before him. Those identical green eyes looked at him with curiosity. Oh how they were just like Dean’s.
He cleared his throat, stating, “I want to talk to you boys about owning a pup. Now that you have Blue, you each have to take responsibility of him". He added, “Do you know what that means?”
Both boys tilted their heads, “What’s it mean papa?” Both boys echoed in unison.
“That means you will have to help out in feeding Blue everyday, bathing him, taking him for a walk, playing with him in the doggy park and giving him lots of cuddles". He asks, “Are you ready for that?”
Both boys nodded their heads with enthusiasm. Roman asked, “Will you and Mr. Inchester help us papa?”
Dean chose that moment to crouch down beside him, smiling fondly and replying before he could, “Of course we will be helping you every step of the way bud".
He nods in affirmation to Dean’s reply. He ruffled his boys' hair just as Blue started jumping up at the boys seeking attention. They all laughed. He stated, “Now go play with Blue. I need to talk to Mr. Winchester".
“Ok papa!” Both boys squeaked out before getting back to playing with Blue.
He sucked in a breath and glanced at Dean. He was met with curious green concerned eyes, “Can we talk Dean?”
“Of course", Dean nodded and got to his feet. “Let’s go talk in the kitchen".
He had been going over and over, in his head, how to approach this. But then again, he felt he had every right to get answers.
He thanked Dean for the coffee, eyes drifting off to his boys who were giggling away with Blue jumping all over them. His mind reeled back to when his babies were born- how tiny, fragile and pink they were. Without taking his eyes off his boys, he commented, “I thought that I knew what love was when they were growing in my belly". He smiled lightly, “But the moment I held their squirming naked bodies in my arms, this……indescribable, fierce feeling took over. I knew from that moment that I couldn’t live without them….that whatever happened to conceive them was worth it and I’d do it all over again". He met Dean’s glassy eyes, “You gave me not one but two wonderful gifts Dean".
He watched as a deep sadness loomed over the man. Dean swallowed, voice filled with emotions as he said, “Castiel…..I don’t know what to say…..I…..I don’t regret being with you all those years back….they were the best moments of my life". He watched Dean’s face morph into one of disgust, “But then I was a coward and left you to birth our children alone…to raise them without a father….to miss the first few years of their lives….all because I was afraid of my fathers reaction". A tear cascaded down Dean’s cheek, the man thumbed at the bridge of his nose, “I was so damn stupid to listen to him".
He could read the genuine hurt on Dean’s face. He could see the regret, the shame and immense guilt of the broken man before him. It didn’t give him satisfaction to see Dean suffer and he knew that if he chose to approach this the wrong way and with a cruel heart then nothing good could come out of it. Anyway, he asked the one question he was dying to ask, “Why Dean? What was the real reason you dumped me? Apart from you listening to your dad".
Dean looked at him with so much angst in his eyes, “He threatened to hurt you Cas". Dean choked out, more tears streaming down his cheeks as he shook his head at himself, “He threatened to kill you".
To say Castiel was shocked was an understatement. He didn’t think it was impossible though, after all, John looked or treated him like dirt under his shoes. He could feel the raw hurt bubble within him, “So you had to leave me because he threatened to kill me?”
Dean looked at him with an unsettled expression, voice almost quiet as he uttered, “ I wish I could blame it on the fear of my dad hurting you Cas but truth is…its me…..I should have defended you, I should have told him to go screw himself, I should have cut ties with him but-"
“You were afraid and young Dean", He interrupted.
“Don’t make excuses for me Cas", Dean choked out: “I should have done something. I am responsible for my own actions". He could see the pain in Dean’s tear filled eyes when the man’s eyes seared into his. The man croaked out in a watery voice, “And if I were you, I wouldn’t let me near the boys. I would tell me to fuck off and say you’re never going to know or see your kids again". Dean whispered, “I don’t deserve them".
He listened to Dean’s self degradation and call him crazy but he knew Dean wasn’t just saying this to get him to feel sorry for him. He knew deep within, things were getting better, his kids were happy, he was standing on his own two feet and no one fooled him. Now was the moment he was to decide whether or not to finally move forwards. He licked his lips, “It hurt me when you left Dean. You hurt me but….but I’ve been living with so much hatred for you that I’m tired now”.
“I understand Cas. You don’t want the kids knowing I’m their father and I support that if that’s what you choose", Dean said shakily while his whole face resembled someone shattered and broken.
He placed his palm on Dean’s, shaking his head, “No Dean. I would never do that to you….I would never do that to my boys….our sons".
“Christ Cas, let me stew in the mess I created", Dean pleaded.
“No Dean!” He firmly uttered. “We may not see eye to eye anymore but our children are innocent”. His heart swelled as his emotions climbed within him, saying in a much softer tone, “They already love you so much".
That’s the exact moment Dean couldn’t hold his heartache back. The man burst into shaky sobs that he tried to muffle with his face shoved into the palms of his hands. His tears ran down his cheeks as he watched the man’s body tremble.
He squeezed Dean’s hand, knowing that the man was finally letting out what he had tried so hard to hold in the moment he found out he had sons’. He said in a shaky sentimental voice, “Dean….I don’t know why our paths crossed again but what I do know is that it’s for reason. And now I figured out after our lovely outing today, that one of the reasons is Roman and Ryder needs their dad too. Though they are happy with me, I know that things would be more brighter with you in the picture".
Dean asked in a watery, drained voice, red eyes meeting his, “What does that mean Cas?”
“It means that I am going to reveal to them that you’re their daddy much sooner than expected”. He asks, “Would you be willing to be there when I do?”
“Of course Cas", Dean replied in a nasally tone. “Are you sure?"
He firmly believed that it was time. He replied, "I'm sure Dean".
Dean studied him for a few seconds before nodding with a small wobbly smile gracing his features, "When do you want me to be there?"
“This coming Saturday Dean".
He watched as Dean swallowed the emotions that were bound to flow out. The man gave him a thankful smile, “Thank you Cas. This means the world to me".
All he could do was return Dean’s smile. “The boys are my world Dean".
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Castiel reveals to the boys who their daddy is....
It was finally the day Castiel would break it to his boys that Mr. Winchester was not just a friendly neighbor but their dad. So here they sat, Roman, Ryder and Blue snuggled on one sofa while he and Dean sat on the one opposite them.
The boys were giggling away as ‘Blue’ went on to lick their faces. Little Roman squealing, “We miss you too, Blue!”
“Yeah!” Ryder added rubbing the Huskies ear with affection.
Castiel spared a glance at Dean who looked nervous as hell- fiddling with his hands and knees bouncing erratically. He was also a nervous wreck, heart pounding as he contemplated the big announcement he was about to make.
Castiel had never thought that this day would ever come and that he could keep the boys all to himself but seems like fate had other plans. He almost felt sad but at the same time happy for his sons.
He muttered, “Ready, Dean?”
Dean’s weary green eyes met his. The 6 foot man swallowed and nodded, “Yes Castiel, I’m ready".
So this was it. Castiel turned to face the boys who were still preoccupied with their best friend ‘Blue'. He couldn’t help but smile at the happiness displayed before him. He gave the boys a few seconds before he uttered, “Boys”.
Ryder and Roman were always quick to respond whenever he would call them. It was a habit from the time they were able to laugh, giggle and walk. And by the looks of it, little ‘Blue's' ears perked up whilst sitting ramrod straight- intent on mimicking the boys attention towards their papa. It was so cute and he wished he had a camera to capture the moment.
The boys responded in unison, “Yes papa?” Followed by a tiny bark from ‘Blue'.
Castiel chuckled lightly. He then announced, “Um papa has something very important to tell you”. He added, “And if you have anything to say, then please feel free to do so. Papa is here for you, ok boys?”
The boys nodded in unison while ‘Blue’ observed and did the same before tilting his head to the side in curiosity as if saying – ‘What is it, Castiel?’ This time he caught Dean chuckling beside him at the display.
He cleared his throat, trying to will his heart down. He bit his bottom lip thinking of a way to approach this. He blew out a breath and leaned forward, elbows resting on thighs, “Boys, you remember when papa told you stories of your dad?”
Dean’s heartbeat escalated. He was slightly shocked about the part where ‘Cas had told his children about their dad'. His heart squeezed so hard as tears slowly pooled in his eyes. Thoughts of ‘he didn’t deserve this’ started making their whispers known. Despite this he remained quiet and slightly fearful.
The boys nodded with enthusiasm. Roman replying, “Aha! You says daddy is a superhero who has to save the world and that’s why he isn’t home!”
Castiel could hear Dean sniffle beside him. He never thought his boys would remember the story he told them when they were just 2 years old. It was a story he did not want to keep repeating unless they asked of course. And he felt it....right in his heart.
“Daddy is Batman!” Ryder stated.
“Nope!” Roman crossed his arms along his chest, “Daddy is Superman!”
Castiel smiled shakily, “Boys". He really didn’t want them to start with their superhero brotherly banter.
Both boys halted their remarks and answered, “Yes papa".
He got up and moved closer to the boys, crouching down before his sons. He ran a hand each down his boys hair, “Listen sweethearts. Yes daddy was busy being a superhero but now wants to finally come meet his boys".
Roman scrunched his features, “Come meet us?” Before his sons eyes lit up wide, all innocent excitement filled those green orbs, “You mean, daddy is going to come be with us!”
Ryder clapped excitedly beside his brother, “When's daddy coming!?”
He couldn’t help the tears that clouded his vision- not of sadness but of how amazing his boys are. Yes, they didn’t know the real truth about why their dad left and he promised that someday when they're both old enough, he and Dean will talk about the real reason why daddy wasn’t there. But not today.
Castiel leaned in and laid gentle pecks on his excited sons' foreheads. He smiled shakily at his boys, “Daddy is already here".
Roman released a ‘huh?’ while Ryder released a ‘where?’
Both the kids looked around the room before turning confused stares at him. He sniffled and turned to a clearly heartbroken Dean. He knew a lot was probably going on in Dean's mind like ‘why had Castiel told his sons that he was a superhero instead of a bad man?’ ‘Why did Castiel defend his stupidity and cowardice?’ ‘How Castiel could remain so calm and gathered when explaining to the boys about their father?’
Truth is, Castiel had made his peace with Dean. He has seen how Dean has changed and he was willing to at least give his sons the chance or choice to be with their father. He held both his son's hands, murmuring, “Your daddy's name is Dean Winchester". He gave them time to figure things out for themselves.
Roman as always was the first to put two and two together. His son’s eyes shot to Dean, tilting his head to the side and in a half confused tone uttered, “Mr. Inchester?”
Ryder let out a squawk. The little one blurting out, “Mr. Inchester, are you our daddy!?”
Little ‘Blue’ let out a bark to back Ryders comment while he furiously wagged his tail.
Everything was quiet. Castiel watched as Dean nodded and carefully replied, “Y-Yes boys. I’m your dad".
Both boys just looked at each other with bugged out eyes, letting out a loud ‘Woah!'.
Then as if a silent message had been passed, the twins scrambled off the sofa and ran towards a stunned Dean. They didn’t hesitate to jump into Dean’s arms, burying their faces into his shirt. He saw Dean finally let loose, sobbing quietly as he gathered his sons closer, kissing both their heads.
Roman looked up at Dean, “Don’t cry daddy. We love you.”
Bless the souls of innocent children. Oh how Castiel couldn’t keep his tears at bay as Dean choked out an emotional sob. This was a beautiful moment he was witnessing.
Then Ryder wiped at his dad's tears with his tiny palm rubbing down those wet cheeks, “Don’t cry daddy. Batman doesn’t cry".
Roman rolled his eyes, “Not batman! Superman! Daddy is superman!” Before Roman scrambled into Dean’s lap.
Ryder all but squawked, “Daddy drives a bat mobile! So he's batman!” The little one then joining his brother on Dean's lap.
Dean's wet eyes filled with so much love and joy met his. A silent ‘thank you' being passed.
His heart fluttered and he nodded in silent response.
He watched as Dean held their boys close, chuckling at whatever the boys were going on about.
Castiel was then distracted when a wet nose started poking at his hands. He laughed when ‘Blue’ forced himself into his arms asking to be cuddled. He chuckled at the little guy, ruffling his fur as he murmured to the puppy, “Yup buddy. Everything is going to be just fine".
Please leave comments and/or kudos as it inspires me to keep writing and to complete this fic :)
Thank you all for bearing with the short hiatus! I'm back to writing this adorable fic :)
One month later…
It was eating at him.
These dormant feelings had begun to surface- feelings he thought ceased to exist the very instant Dean had chose to walk away from their love four years back.
All this while, he had managed to keep Dean at arms length but somehow these past four weeks had seen the man drawing nearer and nearer to his heart. It wasn’t that Dean was forcing him- he was pretty sure that the green eyed man didn’t even realize how he was awakening his romantic feelings.
He was pretty sure he had an idea as to why these feelings have risen.
It had everything to do with his children’s growing relationship with their dad and vice versa.
His heart warmed whenever Ryder and Roman would engulf their dad in hugs. He absolutely loved the patience and care Dean showered their children with- full of love and adoration. Overall, watching the bond between sons and dad become stronger made him desire the perfect family.
And maybe, just maybe, it also had to do with the thought of how he now knew why Dean had to do what he did four years back. Yes, it still wasn’t justifiable in some way- after all, Dean could have manned up and chose him but then again, John could be a manipulative, abusive douchebag who could have went after him if Dean didn’t do what he did.
He saw the disgust and hatred in John's eyes. For once, he was actually happy Dean chose his dad, no matter how painful or else things could have taken a turn for the worse and God forbid in the process he lose his two precious babies if John ever decided to retaliate.
And maybe he should stay mad at Dean but after spending time with the man and getting to know how much Dean had changed- how more confident he was, how remorseful he was, how dedicated he was to the boys, how he had confessed the truth to his fiancé even if he knew he might lose her- it all spoke volumes to him and he wasn’t going to be the selfish one here.
He wasn’t going to deny his boys the right to a beautiful relationship.
See, in his books- he could either look ahead and move forwards or he can hold on to the past, ignore how much Dean has changed and stay stuck.
He chose to move ahead because he was done with carrying this heavy load on his shoulders.
Didn’t mean he was going to be hasty.
He loved Dean- always have and always will- and no doubt was the man stirring up feelings within him but he was going to take things one step at a time. He is curious about the obvious pull between he and Dean- he bet the latter could pretty much feel it too.
He smiled as Dean let out a full bellied laugh.
Ryder let out a war cry, “Bring the big monster down! Bring him down! Bring him down!”
Ryder, Roman and Blue had practically ambushed their dad who was now laughing his guts out on the living room floor.
He could hear the humor in Dean’s voice as the man said in between breaths, “I surrender! I surrender!”
Roman giggled and sat on his dads chest, trying to sound serious as he said, “Will you bow down to King Sebastian the crab!?”
He chuckled when ‘Blue' decided to sit his underbelly on Dean’s mouth, muffling the mans response. The little pup's tail wagged excitedly, tongue lolling out as he refused to move while aiming Ryder proud blue eyes.
Ryder let out a squeaking bubbling giggle before he carried ‘Blue’ into his arms, saying, “How is daddy supposed to talk when your big belly is on his face ‘Blue'?”
Dean ruffled Roman's hair from where he lay while admitting, “I will bow down to king Sebastian the Crab".
“Perfect!” Roman grinned.
“Daddy I’m tired", Ryder unexpectedly chose to snuggle into his dad's side, eyes focused sleepily on the side of Dean’s face.
Roman maneuvered himself to mirror his brother- lying on the other side of their dad- while Blue used the opportunity to lay on Dean’s chest, head resting on paws. From where he sat, Dean, Ryder, Roman and Blue were so immersed in one another that they had temporarily forgotten he was there.
He didn’t mind- he loved to watch.
He watched as Dean, gathered his sons closer to him, the boys heads lying on his shoulder. He watched as Blue’s (who was he and Dean's third son) eyes began to drift close. He listened as Dean hummed ‘Metallica' in a weirdly soothing way. It was like the man was made of complete mush- all the bad boy machismo was chucked out the window.
Dean was a dad. He was a dad to three wonderful boys.
Safety, security and love was all the man channeled to the boys. And it showed- it really did.
Another reason he was falling hard.
Falling for Dean’s love towards his boys (including Blue).
He had to admit- he was slightly fearful as he didn’t know what this meant, where he should go with these discovered feelings, what his next move should or would be? His thoughts were all over the place but one thing was for certain- he was the one who would make the first move.
He knew that Dean respected him and his wishes- he was honestly thankful.
He was startled when Ryder forced his way into his arm, green puppy eyes aimed at him, “Papa".
“Yes baby?” He kissed his sons nose before looking over Ryder's shoulder to see the sweet sight of Dean, Roman and Blue conked out- snuggled warmly. “You don’t feel sleepy bubs?”
Ryder yawned, “No. Papa?”
“Mhmm?” He hugged his baby close. “What is it love?”
“When we going to sleep in daddy's apartment?”
His heart skipped a beat. He knew his son wasn’t meaning him but he and his twin brother. Still it kind of felt like- all of them. He took a deep breath and tried to focus on his kids, “Well baby. Daddy says you can sleep over once your room is done up. It’ll be a surprise".
Ryders voice was starting to slur, his little one sinking into his arms as his head refused to lift from his shoulders, “Will you sleep with us too when we in our new room?”
His heart squeezed as he answered, “No sweetheart. There’s only enough space for you and your brother on your beds".
His littlest murmured sleepily into his shoulder, “Daddy's bed big. You can share".
He hugged his now sleeping son close, "Shhh". While his hand rubbed up and down his sons spine.
His heart fluttered while at the same time his tears clouded his vision.
Happy or sad tears?
Please feel free to drop comments and/or kudos :)
I promise Dean POV in next chapter!
I hope this chapter is clear for you? I kinda wrote this chapter on my phone so yeah....apologies for any mistakes!
Basically, apart from the cute happenings, it's pretty obvious that Cas is starting to catch the feels for Dean...
Warning: Emotional Dean, self degradation.
He was at Castiel’s apartment, helping the man out in setting up the place and getting the meals ready for a special dinner gathering tonight.
He was nervous as hell. Why? Well, today was the day that Sam got to meet his nephews while Charlie (Castiel’s good friend and godmother to his sons’) got to meet Dean proper. All of this wasn’t his suggestion but Castiel’s as the man believed that it would only be fair to meet the people closest in their lives.
Not that it wasn’t a tough call by Castiel. The man had admitted that it was hard to come to this decision but was for the betterment of all. Of course, he had offered that they could wait and don’t have to rush, however, Castiel agreed it was the right time.
It had been an entire two months since his sons had found out that he was their dad. And they were the greatest 2 months of his life. Truly.
He had somehow kept it a secret from Sam all this while- the man still didn’t know the real reason he was inviting him to a get together. His baby brother was going to tear into his ears when he finds out that he’s been keeping mum about having kids.
But he was respecting Cas and his decisions. He owed the man at least that.
That gravelly voice that always made his tummy flutter- ALWAYS- broke him out of his internal monologue and pondering. He met those brilliant curious Blue eyes, “Yes Cas?”
The man had on his infamous searching-deciphering look- complete with squinted eyes, pursed lips and tilted head. Cas asked after a few seconds, “Are you ok?”
“It’s nothing Cas. Just a little nervous, is all”.
He saw Cas face relax, shooting him a sympathetic look. Castiel smiled softly, “Do you want to do this Dean? I can totally postpone if you are not ready”. The care and concern in Cas eyes made his heart yearn.
He quickly shook his head, “No Cas. I’m fine, really”. He rubbed the back of his neck because yes Castiel was making him feel all hot, “Um- do you still want to go through this?”
Castiel took a deep breath and nodded, “I’m not going to lie Dean. I am nervous and part of me wants to cancel this meetup but I know that I can’t be selfish, it is important that our boys get to meet significant others and get to know them. The sooner the better. It’s a hard step but a highly necessary one”.
He nodded. “I understand Cas and thank you”.
Castiel smiled and there was this hidden mischief in his eyes. The man stated, “It’s not the boys I’m worried about Dean, it’s you”.
Ok what in the hell did that mean?
He found himself stumbling out, “W-Why?”
Castiel chuckled and made his way over to him. The man placed a warm palm on his shoulder, squeezing lightly, “It’s my best friend, my son’s aunt and godmother, Charlie Bradbury that you may have to impress”. The man shot apologetic eyes at him, “She kind of knows about our past. I’m sorry”.
He could honestly drift off whenever those eyes were fixated on him, however, he had enough sense to click out of his hypnosis at Castiel’s apology. He immediately shook his head, unconsciously laying his hand atop Cas- that was on his shoulder. He gave the man’s hand a light squeeze, “Hey don’t apologize Cas. She was your rock when I was off with my dad being a coward. If anything, I deserve her wrath and judgement”.
Yes he did deserve it. In fact he didn’t deserve to be given a chance to know the kids. His kids deserved a father who didn’t abandon them. Castiel deserves someone who would make him happy. He was never good enough. A damn coward.
Apparently, he had blanked out a little- maybe drifted off, and he was pretty sure his face had reflected off his inner turmoil and self-degradation because next he knew he was being engulfed in a warm hug. He felt his knees become weak, his body stiffen. Castiel’s gravelly voice close to his ear, sent shivers down his spine as the man said in a quite firm voice, “Stop doing this to yourself Dean! I have already forgiven you!”
He felt the burn of tears in his eyes as his heart squeezed in pain, still he couldn’t bring his hands up to hold Cas. His chin rested on the man’s shoulder, eyes staring at the picture of Roman and Ryder at one month old. He found himself croaking out, “I don’t deserve them Cas. They deserve to have a dad that will never hurt them”. He found himself whispering, “Who has never hurt them”.
Castiel rubbed up and down his spine, murmuring, “Dean, hug me back. Just for a while”. There was still that underlying order in his soft tone.
Dean swallowed and slowly brought his hands up to Cas mid waist, wrapping his arms around and gripping onto the back of Castiel’s flannel. Immediately, he felt himself slowly begin to calm, his heart beat slowly returning to normal. He felt the tears finally stream down his face as he realized that this was the first time after a very long time that he finally got to hug Castiel. He had forgotten how Cas always calmed him down with a hug in the past. It always worked. He swallowed the lump in his throat and uttered, “I’m sorry for everything Cas. I truly am”.
Castiel didn’t say anything for a few minutes, just kept on rubbing his back till he stopped shaking. The man then pulled back, but his arms came to rub up and down his biceps in a soothing manner while glassy blue eyes met his. The man smiled sadly, “Dean, I’m not going to sugar coat anything but here are the facts. Your sons, Roman and Ryder love you. They don’t know anything about the hurt you talk about”.
“But they should”, he quickly added. “They should know that their dad abandoned them and their papa”.
“You know Dean, I don’t look at it as abandonment anymore. Maybe I did at one time but not anymore”.
“Why not Cas? I practically chose my dad over you. That’s abandonment in my books and it’ll never change”. He could still see those hurt teary broken blue eyes that he had to turn away from.
Castiel nodded, “Like I said Dean, I did at one time. But now I look at it as you protecting me, our unborn children- which you completely didn’t know existed at the time. You saved us Dean. It hurt deeply but you saved us”.
“Cas”, he felt those words strike him right in the heart. “How could you say that?” No, no, Cas couldn’t possibly think that? It wasn’t right.
Castiel’s eyes held sincerity as he added, “I am a firm believer in everything happens for a reason, Dean. All these years, I have been nothing but bitter and that’s because I didn’t know what was happening at the time. That’s because I didn’t know how your father had threatened to end my life. And I believed he would, if you had chosen me over him”.
“You want know how I know you’re a truly good person inside Dean?” Castiel continued without waiting for an answer from Dean, “Because, you didn’t run this time. You showed remorse, you chose to tell your fiancé about the guy next door whose kids were yours even if you knew it would break your relationship, because the moment you found out that the twins were yours- you didn’t leave and because all I see is a man who absolutely adores his children and I know would die for them”.
Once again his eyes swam with tears.
Cas had his own tears in his beautiful eyes, softly saying, “Dean, you have to forgive yourself too. Never forget that you have people that still love you and that includes me”.
He felt those words rattle his very being. His tears once again flowing, but this time he felt more at peace with himself. He didn’t want to jump the gun on Castiel’s words so all he could say was. “Thank you Cas”.
“We will work this out together Dean. One step at a time.”
“Daddy? Papa?” Came a sleepy voice.
They looked to see a still sleepy looking Roman with his hair sticking out everywhere. The kid rubbed at his eyes while lazily dragging his feet towards them. His youngest wrapped an arm around both their legs and rested his head on his thigh. The green one’s eyes looking up, back and forth between them, “I had a dream about pink unicorns with rainbow tails”. His youngest then yawned. “It said that it wanted to brush my hair”.
Dean and Castiel chuckled. He heaved his little one into his arms, hugging him close as he could. His baby boy held on like a little monkey would his mom, cheek resting on his shoulder. The little ones eyes were slowly drooping.
Castiel fondly rubbed his sons back, eyes flicking over to meet his, “You got this?”
He breathed in his son’s apple shampoo, instantly loving it. He cradled his sleeping son to him, a smile aimed at Castiel, “I got this Cas”.
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The first to arrive was Sam with an unopened bottle of red wine.
Dean ushered him in and gave him a hug at the door. They were alone so Sam asked, “Dean why are we at your ex’s place?” Sam’s eyes narrowed, “Did you end your engagement with Jo just so you could hook up with your ex!?”
Dean’s heart still hurt whenever he thought of Jo because she deserved so much better. He quickly corrected, “No Sammy! I didn’t break up with Jo just so I could hook up with my ex!” His heart was pounding though- real hard.
Sam took in his big brothers fidgety look. His brother was not the nervous type. He asked softly, “Dean tell me the truth?”
“Sam, its better if I show you”.
Dean sucked in a breath and headed towards the living room with Sam following closely behind. As they neared, Sam could hear kids voices squealing in delight, laughing and blabbing- ‘Blue, we have to say excuse me if we fart loud’ followed by ‘your fart stinks, Blue’.
Somehow, Sam’s mind was already reeling at the most possible explanation for being here. His thoughts were confirmed when two voices squealed, “Daddy! You’re back!” He watched the heartwarming sight of Dean crouching down before two twin boys- who immediately clambered to either side of Dean, wrapping an arm around his brothers shoulder while seating on Dean’s thighs.
Dean laid a kiss on both boys cheeks, carrying them both as he stood, “Daddy went to open the door, boys”.
“But we still miss you!” The kid on the left with a red checkered flannel and blue jeans laid a return peck of his father’s cheek. Then the other kid in the blue checkered flannel and blue jeans laid a peck on the other side of Dean’s cheek, “We miss you lots daddy!”
Sam could see the love in Dean’s eyes as he gazed fondly at his kids. The man replying, “Well I missed you boys too. I love you both”.
“We love you too daddy!” The twins answered in unison followed by a bark from what Sam noticed was a husky pup with blue eyes sitting snuggly on the sofa with its tail wagging. Dean chuckled along with his sons, replying, “Yes I love you too, Blue”.
Then Sam watched as Dean swallowed, eyes intently focused on his sons’, “Boys remember how daddy had asked you if you wanted to meet my little brother, your Uncle Sam?”
Both boys nodded enthusiastically, “Yeah daddy!”
Dean’s eyes then flicked over to meet Sam’s. Sam looked quite shy and doe eyed as he stared at the boys in absolute wonder. Dean knew his brother was sold on his sons’. Dean’s eyes went back to his boys, “Well boys, I’d like you to meet your Uncle Sam. Daddy’s little brother”.
The kids eyes lit up, round and wide, as they finally laid Dean’s inherited identical green eyes on Sam. The little one’s jaws both dropped to the ground, both saying, “WOAH!”
Sam gave a half wave, smiling shyly, “Hi”.
The one in red checkered flannel blurted, “You’re as big as Hagrid!”
“Are you sure he’s your little brother, daddy!?” The one in the blue checkered flannel aimed questioning eyes at Dean.
Dean chuckled, “Yes I am absolutely 100% sure that’s my little brother boys”.
The one in red checkered flannel then tilted his head, curious eyes aimed at Sam, “Did you eat your broccoli Uncle Sam?”
Sam’s tears prickled the corner of his eyes as he replied with a smile, “Yes kiddo I did”.
“Bleh!” The one in the blue checkered flannel scrunched his face in disapproval.
Meanwhile, the red checkered flannel twin rolled his eyes at his brother, “Broccoli is good for you Ryder!” The little one stuck his arm out in Sam’s direction, “Look at how gigantor he is and he has glossy long hair!”
Sam could see Dean trying not to burst out laughing at his son’s words. He raised a brow at Dean earning a chuckle from the man. Dean cleared his throat, heading towards Sam, “Ok boys. Proper introductions”. His brother smiled at Sam, “Sammy, I’d like you to meet your nephews”. Dean bounced the kid in the red checkered flannel lightly, “This here is Roman”. Dean then bounced the kid in the blue checkered flannel lightly, “And this here is the eldest of the two and his name’s Ryder”.
Sam held out a hand for the boys to shake, “It’s a pleasure to meet you both, Ryder and Roman”.
Both boys instantly gripped his hand at the same time, shaking it and giggling. Ryder asked a little enthusiastically, “Carry me, Uncle Sammy!?”
Sam chuckled, hands out accepting Ryder as he climbed into his arms. Ryder ran a hand down Sam’s hair in absolute fascination, “Your hair feels softer than my Aunt Char!”
“We good Sammy?” Dean asked.
Sam smiled at his brother. He didn’t know why Dean kept the boys from him but all he knew was he had already forgiven his brother. He could see that these boys loved their dad and that was more than enough for him to get settled. He said, “Yeah we’re good Dean”.
Sam had Ryder perched on his lap, while he chatted off to Castiel. Not long after being properly introduced to the boys, Castiel had walked in. The man was purely inspiring and immensely kind hearted and accommodating- made him wonder why Dean would leave such a man?
Well doesn’t take a genius to figure that out.
Their dad didn’t hide how much he had despised homosexuality and pretty much beat it into Dean.
Sam observed the way Castiel would look at Dean in complete fondness when the man was busy answering Roman’s different questions. It was clear that the Roman probably took after Cas because no way in hell did his brother like broccoli- but Roman definitely did. He could see that Ryder took more of Dean’s side with his cocky attitude and love for pie- like that was all the little one could talk about.
What’s your favorite pie Uncle Sammy? Apple pie is tastier than all the other pie’s right Uncle Sammy? I can’t wait for desert because it’s pie! Do you prefer a whole pie or a slice of pie? I think superman doesn’t eat pie that’s why he forgets to wear his underwear inside!
That last one certainly earned an annoyed huff from Roman.
Soon the doorbell rang. Castiel excused himself, “I’ll get that”.
“That must be Aunty Char!” Ryder bounced on Sam’s lap excitedly.
Sam glanced over to his brother to see the man once again looking slightly nervous and trying to force a smile. Whoever this Aunty Char is, it made Dean a little uncomfortable.
Suddenly a boisterous, “Hello boys!” broke through the air as a happy looking red head in a ‘Gryffindor House’ Tee came bustling into the living room. The boys didn’t spare a second as they clambered off Dean and Sam’s laps, running over to the red head, “Aunty Char! Aunty Char!” Before jumping into her open arms for a hug.
The red head, kissed both the boys foreheads, “Oh I missed you babies so much!”
The hugs and greetings went on for at least another minute. Sam and Dean were both now standing and watching on quietly. Sam caught how Castiel came to stand beside Dean, hand rubbing up and down the man’s bicep in a sort of soothing manner.
Castiel then said, “Charlie I’d like you to meet Dean Winchester”.
Charlie had on this searching look as she walked up to Dean. She held a hand out, voice almost too sweet as if she was on to something, “Hello Dean. It’s finally nice to meet the father of Cas’ boys”.
That totally sounded protective if not possessive.
Sam’s eyes drifted over to Castiel who was now spotting a slight frown aimed at Charlie. Meanwhile, Dean gulped and through his shaky smile, placed his hand into Charlie’s, voice a little hesitant as he greeted, “Hello Charlie”.
Sam knew this was going to be one tough dinner for Dean.
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Charlie gives Dean her piece of mind.
There was no hostility from Charlie throughout the dinner. The red head had made friendly banter with everyone (Dean included). However, Castiel saw the underlying protectiveness and judgement in Charlie’s eyes whenever she glanced Dean’s way.
Castiel knew that Charlie was waiting for the opportune moment to get some alone time with Dean. And that time arrived when the boys were watching a cartoon with their uncle Sam while Dean helped Castiel clear the dishes.
“Hey Dean. Want to escort a lady to buy her smokes?”
Castiel frowned at the obvious ‘Charlie doesn’t smoke' while Dean had on a look that spoke ‘anxiety and hesitation'.
“You don’t smoke Charlie”, Castiel said.
Charlie clicked her tongue, “Says who?” She smiled overly sweet at Dean, “Come on Dean. It ain’t safe for a lady to go to the store alone at night".
Castiel knew what Charlie was getting at and let out a sigh, “Really Red?” He aimed her an unimpressed look.
Charlie challenged back, “Yes Castiel".
Dean could see that the friends were about to butt heads if he didn’t interfere, so he said, “I’ll go with you".
Charlie let out a ginormous toothy grin, “Great!” Almost too nice.
Dean then clarified, “But we have to be back before the boys go to sleep. I promised Ryder that I’ll read them the ‘fire engine' story before bedtime". Yes Dean knew that Charlie wanted to give him her piece of mind- hello she had been there for Cas when he should have been, plus he deserved it- but not at the expense of his children’s time.
Dean had already missed a lot in his boys lives; he wasn’t going to waste a moment more.
Charlie nodded, “Very well Dean". She was clearly impressed.
Dean and Charlie did not converse while the red head led them, on foot, to a nearby park. They found a spot just by the kids playground, taking a seat on one of the colorful long benches.
It was a fairly warm night, the stars were out, the moon smiling bright and the soft night breeze blew freshness into their faces.
There was a few minutes of quietness before Charlie (who hadn’t taken her eyes off the swings) spoke, “So, I take it you may have an idea why I asked you to come with me?”
Dean swallowed lightly, “Yeah".
Charlie spared a glance at the man who had his hands buried into his jacket pockets, eyes staring at something up ahead. Surprisingly, Dean didn’t make her feel angry or irritated- the whole night. At this moment, she saw an immensely guilty man.
Nevertheless, she had to speak her mind. Better to start with the hardcore facts, “Do you know how much Cas has been through?”
That’s when glassy emeralds finally met hers- the sadness was clear.
Dean nodded but chose to remain silent.
Charlie continued, a faraway look adorned her features, “When I first met Castiel, he was this empty shell. He was strong but deep inside, you could see how broken and afraid he was. Afraid because he had just birthed two beautiful boys and had no one around”. She met his tear filled eyes, “Not even his own family wanted to accept him or the boys".
Dean furrowed his brow at the ground. Castiel only ever spoke of his family once during their relationship, and just from the venom in his at-the-time boyfriends voice, he knew that the bond was estranged. But to hear that his ex's own family didn’t care for him after birth just made him feel even more lousy and guilty. No one was there for Cas. He shook his head, murmuring, “I never knew his family wasn’t there for him".
“Well he won't share that with anyone he doesn’t trust, let alone the person who had chosen to abandon him”.
Dean felt a tear roll down his cheek, his heart squeezing at Charlie's words. He nodded, “I don’t deserve him. I know that".
“No you don’t deserve him Dean! And if I were Castiel, I wouldn’t have introduced you to the boys!", Charlie said sharply. There it was! Her disapproval.
“I understand. If someone had hurt me like that, I wouldn’t too".
Charlie could see how lost Dean was. She wished she could dig her knife in deeper, make him hurt for all the years that Castiel felt alone. But seeing how close Castiel and the boys had grown towards Dean, it wouldn’t be fair. They deserved happiness, even if it’s with the man who had once chose the cowards way out.
She sighed, “Dean I don’t hate you. And from what I have seen tonight, Castiel and the boys adore you very much. If anything, their happiness in paramount to me. Not my personal vendetta or preferences".
A self mocking laugh tore out from Dean, “I don’t deserve them".
“Yeah well they deserve happiness! Those boys deserve to have their father in their lives! My best friend deserves to have a man who will choose him!” She clipped out.
Dean knew she was right. He turned to her, “What do you want me to do Charlie?” He surely sounded lost.
Charlie felt her temperament ebb away. She placed a hand on his fidgety ones, “Its not what I want Dean. It’s what you want? This is your choice to make? But be real certain because you have much more to base your choices on".
“I want Cas. I want my boys. I want my family to be together. Forever.” He said without a moments hesitation.
Charlie beamed like a Cheshire cat, “Well then ok! Go for it!”
Dean aimed a strange look at her, “Wait aren’t you suppose to like…warn me or beat my ass?”
“Oh I’m getting to that Inchester!”
Dean gulped. You and your big mouth Dean! He cleared his throat, “Um its Winchester".
She shot him a narrowed look, “Well since the boys call you Inchester! I’ll call you Inchester too! Got a problem with that?”
Dean quickly raised both hands up, “Um no ma'am".
“Good!” Charlie made a show of cracking her knuckles before her, “Now, a few words from the queen herself". She shot him a stone cold look, prodding at Dean’s chest, “If you ever, EVER, break Cas or my sweet boys hearts, I will make sure they never find your body ever again. Do I make myself clear, Inchester?”
Dean could see the seriousness in her eyes. He quickly replied, “Yes! Charlie!”
“Oh and FYI- I’ll totally do you Dexter style".
He stuttered, “Got it Charlie. No breaking Cas and the boys hearts unless I want to be chopped up into pieces and thrown into the river".
A devious smile climbed her face, “Exactly!”
Man this girl was damn scary if she wanted to be.
The ding of an incoming message broke through the silence. Dean pulled out his phone and saw that it was an unread from Cas.
Hey Dean. If Charlie hasn’t already murdered you yet; can the both of you return. Our sons are feeling sleepy and Ryder is feeling moody and restless. They are demanding their bed time story and hugs with daddy.
Dean smiled fondly at the screen, quickly sending an ‘We’ll be there in five' reply. He glanced at a smiling Charlie, “The boys and Cas need me".
Charlie winked, “Of course they need you Dean".
Somehow those words touched his heart and soul as it carried so much meaning.
Please feel free to leave comments and/or kudos as it helps inspire me to keep writing :)
So, I decided to add a chapter on the twins and uncle Sam's interactions when Dean and Charlie were gone. Guaranteed to make you giggle or laugh 😏
While Charlie and Dean were away….
Ryder couldn’t keep his attention on the cartoon. Why? Because uncle Sammy's hair was distracting him- in a good way. He ended up sitting atop uncle Sammy's lap, a ¼ into the ‘Thomas the train' cartoon- his tiny hands were brushing that long brown shoulder length hair. He even took a sniff and blurted, “Wow! Your hair is fabulous! It reminds me of strawberries!”
Sam blushed lightly, “Well I kinda use strawberry shampoo. My wife likes the smell".
“She's awesome! Like me, because I like strawberries too!”
Castiel walked in to see his son with his fingers fully buried into his uncle Sam's hair. He scolded, “Ryder, it is immensely rude for you to go digging your entire hand into people’s hair without their permission".
“But it’s so soft!” Ryder replied and brushed a strand of hair behind Sam's left ear.
Castiel shook his head, warning, “Ryder!”
Sam immediately responded, “Its ok Castiel”. He winked down at Ryder, “I’ll allow Ryder to play with my hair because he is my nephew and he is saying really amazing things".
“You sure Sam?” Castiel took a seat on the singles couch.
Sam beamed, “Yeah all’s good, thanks".
“Does that mean I can touch your hair too, uncle Sammy!?” Roman scooted over to Sam's side.
Sam chuckled, “Oh yeah sweetheart. Be my guest".
Roman clapped happily before he stood up on the sofa, leaning into his uncles right bicep and running his fingers through those brown locks in deep fascination, “Its so amazing! Do you comb it, uncle Sammy!?”
“Yes I do sweetheart", Sam wrapped an arm around Roman's mid waist, pulling the child in to snuggle close. He was so happy that his nephews had warmed up to him- enough to trust him.
Castiel watched on in clear interest. It warmed his heart to see how his sons were fond of their uncle Sam. It also made him feel overly delighted that his boys were actually getting to know people who would care for them; who would love them. Silence was the best thing for him to do at this moment while the boys bonded with their uncle Sam.
Ryder smiled, “How do you make it glow?”
“Well I guess I use a really good shampoo, plus, I eat a lot of vegetables and fruits that are said to give the hair a natural shine".
Ryder huffed and whined, “Oh man!”
Sam looked confused at the older twin's disgruntled look, “What’s the matter sweetheart?”
Ryder replied quite over dramatically, “Why does it ALWAYS have to be fruit and vege's!? Why can’t they say, HERE HAVE SOME PIE, ITS GOOD FOR YOUR HAIR!”
Sam couldn’t contain his laugh, he full on threw his head back as the humor tore out of him. His happy tears filled his eyes, he looked to a smiling Castiel, commenting, “This one really takes after his dad".
“Oh yeah totally", Castiel chuckled.
Roman intervened, giving in his own two cents, “I personally think that eating your fruits and vege's is very important for your hair”. He shrugged, toying with a strand of his own hair, “I mean, look at how flawless my hair is! Its glossier than Ryder's!”
Castiel really didn’t know where his youngest son's current catchy vocabulary sprang up from but he wasn’t complaining. Actually, now he was going to have his hands full with trying to calm the boys banter down- which was clearly going to surprise Sam.
Of course, it was Ryder who was always first to dispute, aiming an annoyed look at his twin, “Excuse me! My hair is longer than yours!”
“Yeah! But mines thicker! Everyone's hair grows longer but it’s the thickness that matters!” Roman countered.
Meanwhile, Sam just looked at Castiel with bugged out eyes as the twins went on a brotherly banter war- while he sat in the middle.
“Says me!” Roman threw out.
“Boys!” Castiel tried to interrupt.
Ryder wasn’t done nor had he seemed to hear his papa. He squinted his eyes, “I hear the cutie pies prefer boys with longer hair because it’s cool!”
“Says who!?” Roman blurted folding his arms along his chest.
“Says me!” Ryder responded. “Why do you think Christopher from apartment 15 likes to stare at me? It’s because of my LONGER hair!”
Castiel’s words got stuck in his mouth when he heard Christopher’s name. He tried to keep in his ‘aww' and laughter as he thought of the kid in apartment 15- he was the Mason's 5 year old son- an adorable sweetheart who wore glasses. Before he could get in a word, Sam asked curiously, “Who's Christopher?”
Roman blurted with a roll of his eyes, “He's Ryder's boyfriend".
Sam was trying so hard not to crack a laugh- just like Castiel was. Castiel managed to clear his throat, “Ok boys that’s enough".
“Yup and he wears glasses just like Harry Potter's!” Ryder added proudly.
“That’s why he can’t see who the handsome brother really is!” Roman smartly added.
“Whaaaat!?” Ryder scoffed. “You’re just jealous!”
“Says me!” Ryder blurted.
“Yeah! Well guess what!?” Roman threw back.
“He likes superman like me! He's got a superman bag pack, he has a superman lunch box, he wears superman shoes, he wears superman t-shirts and once I saw him in superman PJ's. True story!", Roman added teasingly.
Ryder squinted his eyes, “Are you spying on my boyfriend!?”
“No!” Roman says then goes silent.
Ryder huffed, “You’re a boob!”
“You’re a boob!” Roman countered.
Castiel had had enough. It was cute to see his sons quarrelling over a boy but it was coming to a point where it would escalate to nowhere good. So he put on his ‘don’t mess with me' papa voice, “Boys! I said that’s enough!”
Everything went silent. Even Sam was hesitant to move an inch.
As always the boys said in unison, “Sorry papa!”
Castiel saw that his sons were tired which was maybe one of the reasons they were grouchy. He sighed, “I think it’s time for bed”.
“Yeah", Roman yawned.
Ryder grumbled, “I want daddy! I want him to read me a story!”
Castiel knew that grumpy look. Ryder wasn’t going to let up. He smiled at Sam, “Excuse me Sam. Let me just send Dean a quick message yeah?”
“Yeah sure", Sam replied. “I’ll keep an eye on them".
“Thank you", Castiel replied before heading off to send Dean a text.
Wait till Dean and Charlie hears what happened while they were gone. Yup they’ll probably laugh it up over a cup of steaming coffee.
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All I'm saying is trouble is approaching....
Trouble always finds a way of trying to ruin something good. It’s really what you do at that point in time, when trouble comes knocking, that really matters.
It all started out like this....
Dean had decided that the boys rooms was ready to be slept in, so naturally he informed Cas. Dean wanted Cas to have the final say on the room before he revealed it to the boys. Charlie had taken the boys to the park for a little while, which gave Cas the opportunity to come over and see the room.
Dean had a hand on the door knob to the boys room, saying, “Close your eyes Cas”.
Castiel did as he was told, already feeling giddy. He heard the jerk of the door knob, before he felt Dean's warm palm gently grip him by the forearm, guiding him forwards. He was getting overly excited now and a tad impatient, “Can I open my eyes now?”
He heard Dean chuckle before the man said, “You can open them".
Cas jaw practically fell to the ground, as he took in the half superman, half batman themed room. There was even a batmobile bed and a themed superman bed with the ‘S' symbol on the sheets and pillows that were red and blue. What he assumed was Roman's side- walls was blue with superman figures flying amongst the stars and on Ryders side was more of a greyish, yellow, black wall that had batman figures standing atop tall buildings with his cape flying behind. His eyes landed on the shelves that were littered with plush toys- from superman to batman to a pink unicorn to....wait what?
Castiel pointed, “There’s a pink unicorn with a rainbow tail on the shelf Dean.”
Dean shrugged, “I remember that Roman likes unicorns too- so hey why not".
Castiel’s heart figuratively melted. He clasped at his heart, “That’s so sweet of you Dean".
Dean felt a flush creep up his cheeks at Castiel’s fond expression, he stuck his hands into the front pocket of his Jean’s, bouncing on the balls of his feet, “So what do you think of the room?”
Castiel studied the space themed carpet that covered the floor of the room, eyes finding Dean’s as he happily stated, “I think they will love it!” He added, “Thank you for doing this Dean. I know it will mean alot to the boys just like it does me".
Dean felt his heart swell and tears cloud his eyes. His heart felt a little heavy and his voice thick as he stated, “Well that’s all I ever want. To make you and our sons happy".
Castiel’s heart pained whenever he saw Dean like this. Yes, Dean had hurt him in the past, but by God the man has proven how dedicated and remorseful he was to Cas and the boys these last couple of months. He smiled shakily and walked up to Dean, rubbing a hand up and down the man's bicep, “You have succeeded Dean. Thank you for being a big, bright part of me and our sons’ lives".
They were clearly feeling some sort of magnetic pull towards each other. It was charged and allowed their eyes to delve into each others deepest core. Castiel felt himself being drawn to this changed man before him- his own heart fluttered at how familiar this feeling was- much like when he and Dean were when they were together nearly 6 years back- before everything went to shits. Surprisingly, it didn’t scare him as much as it should. This was all he ever dreamt of or wanted- to be bound to the man he always loved.
Dean wanted to pull the blue eyed beauty by the waist and plant a sweet kiss on those perfect lips, however, he knew he didn’t have the right to- heck he didn’t even deserve it. He was too deep into his mesmerized daydream that he gasped when he was the one being pulled in by strong hands that gripped his waist. He was nose to nose with Cas now, heart beating so hard against his ribcage, he squeaked, “C-Cas?”
Castiel remained undeterred and quite to the point as he ran a thumb down Dean’s jugular, eyes piercing Dean’s as he asked, “Be honest with me Dean. Do you want this?” Do you want what we once had before?
Dean swallowed, nodding, “Y-Yes Cas. I do want this".
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to hurt me again Dean, certainly not our sons, so be sure".
Dean already knew in his heart what he wanted. He uttered, running his hands down Cas' sides to rest on his waist, “I’m never leaving you and our sons ever again, Cas. I’m in it for life".
That was all the answer Cas needed. He leaned in and claimed the lips of the man he loved. Nothing could describe the feelings that rolled between the two men as they kissed out the pain and welcomed the beginning of new and better things to come- holding on to each other tight- never wanting to let go. Never again.
It was the buzzing of a phone in Dean’s back pocket that finally broke the two men apart. Dean groaned and leaned his forehead against a chuckling, crimson, Cas. He pouted, “I don’t want to answer any calls".
Castiel pecked Dean lightly on the lips, “Answer it baby".
Dean’s heart thrummed at being called ‘baby’. He sighed as the phone buzzed persistently, grumbling, “Fine". He pulled his phone out of his back pocket, huffing when he saw it was ‘Sammy'. He answered, “This better be good Sammy! You just-".
He was cut off when Sam blurted, “Dean he's on his way to your place!”
Dean at first was confused, “What the hell are you going on about Sammy!? Whose on their way here?”
Dean’s heart almost climbed out his throat. His hand shook as he quietly asked, “W-when did he arrive?”
“He must have come in sometime today. I tried to tell him to keep away from you because you were still settling in but he wouldn’t budge!” Sam then adds almost frighteningly, “Dean he knows about you and Jo not being together anymore”.
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose, “Its ok Sam. I’ll clear things up with him".
“Well I’m on my way to you Dean. He should be there soon".
Just then the doorbell rang. Dean muttered, “He's here Sammy”.
“Dean?” Sam carefully said.
“Follow your heart. Don’t let him tell you how to live your life".
Dean appreciated his brothers concern. It actually filled him with much needed empowerment, and amplified when he looked over to a concerned Cas. This man before him was all the inspiration he needed, he replied, “I’m not letting him come between Cas and I anymore Sammy. See ya soon bro". With that he ended the call.
Castiel had a fair idea what was going on from the last sentence Dean said into the receiver and by Gods it terrified him to the very core. It felt like Deja vu. He was most probably going to lose Dean and he couldn’t go through it again. He shook where he stood as he asked, “He's coming? He's going to tear us apart again".
Dean was not going to let Cas feel this insecure again. Never again! He cupped the papa of his children’s cheek, eyes burning into Cas as he firmly said, “I’m taking control Cas. You and our boys are the most important people in my life and I meant when I said I am never abandoning all of you ever again".
Castiel nodded, feeling a little settled and hugged the man before him, whispering into Dean's shoulder, “What do you want me to do?”
Cas was not going to be his dirty little secret. He stepped back and threaded his fingers into Cas, squeezing lightly, “Come on baby. I want John to know who I chose to be with. No more hiding".
Castiel smiled fondly at the father of his children- again who has changed so much, “Ok Dean. Let’s do this".
Dean raised Cas hand to his lips, kissing the man's knuckles, “I love you baby".
“I love you too Dean".
With that they headed towards Dean's front door with nothing to hide.
Please feel free to leave comments and/or kudos as it helps inspire me to keep writing :)
Warning: Homophopic and deragatory words. Please don't read if triggered easily.
So will Dean choose Cas?
Dean laid a kiss on the back of Cas hand, “You ready, baby?”
Castiel gathered himself, taking a deep breath, “Yes Dean. Let’s do this". The warmth of Dean’s hand providing him security and courage.
When they opened the door, lo behold, a pissed off John Winchester stands.
Castiel watched Dean boldly stand his ground, “Dad? What’re you doing here?”
John’s eyes travelled from Dean’s face, down to Castiel and Dean’s entwined fingers. The older Winchester shot narrowed eyes back and forth between his son and Cas, “What is the meaning of this, Dean!?”
Dean matched his fathers scrutinizing gaze, “What does it look like dad!? I’m standing before you with the man I love".
John balked, aiming stink eyes at Castiel, “You’re not a faggot like this…thing here Dean!”
Well Castiel definitely felt the sting of the older Winchesters words. He stood frozen to the spot, honestly feeling afraid. John Winchesters death stare could make someone piss himself, hence his gaze shot to the floor.
Dean grit his teeth together, “His name is Castiel, John! And he is the papa of my children!”
That little piece of information stunned John. The man shot incredulous- menacing eyes at Castiel, “You’re a carrier?”
Castiel swallowed, “Y-Yeah".
Dean pulled Castiel to his side, “Yes he is a carrier, dad. For that I am thankful because he has gifted me with two beautiful boys. You have two grandsons John”.
John’s jaw ticked, then he said a word that stabbed Castiel in the heart, “Abominations!”
That was also the moment Castiel witnessed Dean lose his control. The man had let go of his hand, hooked his father by the lapels of his leather jacket and shoved him against the wall. Dean’s voice boomed, “DON’T YOU EVER CALL MY CHILDREN THAT! YOU HEAR OLD MAN!”
John cackled like a maniac, spitting out in his sons face, “What will people think if they saw you with….a freak of nature….like Castiel? What would they think if they knew A MAN birthed your kids?” John could feel his sons grip loosening which told him that his words were taking effect. He continued, “You can leave Dean. You deserve normalcy".
Castiel felt his whole world was slowly slipping back into darkness. His heart filled with dread and doubt as he saw that Dean was slowly slipping back into the old Dean that broke his heart, 5 years back. Oh God!
Dean had all sorts of thoughts running in his mind right now. It felt like his fathers words were taking a hold of him, but as time passed, he remembered.
He remembered their voices, he remembered their laughter, he remembered their green identical eyes, he remembered reading them stories, he remembered their little batman and superman themed bedroom, he remembered the first time they bumped into him wearing their teddy bear jammies, he remembered how much they loved him.
He remembered how much he loved them.
John coaxed, “Come with me son. Go back to Jo. She can give you kids that I bet would be much more normal".
Dean felt his heart squeeze and tears cloud his eyes, shoving his father once more against the wall. There was anger in him, but he was able to control it, his voice thick as he said, “I pity you John”. He took a few steps back to center himself, arms out as he said, “Why can’t you see that I’m happy? Don’t you want what’s best for your children?”
John grit out, feeling irritation fill him, “What’s best for my son is that he goes back to Jo!”
There was tears rolling down Castiel’s cheeks. He didn’t want to face rejection again, so he refused to look at the pair. He only closed his eyes, psyching himself for the worst. But then he startled, eyes flicking open the moment he felt Dean’s warm hand slip into his. His eyes met watery green eyes, holding so much love and affection, “Cas and my sons are MY family now John”. Castiel felt his heart stutter as he gasped.
Dean winked at Castiel before he turned to face John, throwing a smirk at his dad, “Nothing you say, will change my mind. So I'd appreciate it if you leave me and my family alone".
John warned, “Or what!?”
“Or you’ll be reported for harassment and I’ll have a restraining order filed against you within the hour!” Came Sam's voice to the left.
John took in his younger son who had just arrived, he challenged, “You don’t have the guts to do that Sammy! I AM YOUR FATHER!”
Sam folded his muscular arms along his chest, “Well I don’t know about that dad. You see, I’m damn good at my job. Everything is just a dial away".
Castiel watched as the Winchester brothers cornered their dad with their words. Dean shrugged, “You see, I think you should listen to him John”. Dean smirked, “He's a damn good lawyer. Heck! He's the best in the damn state".
“Why thank you bro”.
“You’re welcome Sammy!” Dean folded his arms along his chest, “You see John. I ain't some little, helpless teen anymore. I know right from wrong. I know that you tried to shove your beliefs and stereotypical thinking unto Sam and I. Heck we listened because we were afraid. But we aren’t anymore because we’re grown men. Your mind games won’t work on us anymore”.
John stood stunned and taken aback by his son's boldness.
Dean wasn’t done. He said, “John. You need to leave. Don’t come back here”.
John huffed and spat out, “You’re making a big mistake Dean! You will never be happy!” With that John stomped away. "I don't need to waste my time with this shit!"
Dean ignored his dad's final words and breathed a sigh of relief, heading straight to Castiel, pulling the man into his arms, “Are you ok?”
Castiel buried his face into Dean’s shoulder, “You chose us".
It was then Dean realized that Castiel was crying into his shoulder. He met Sam's sad eyes over Cas shoulder, he nodded at his brother before he laid a kiss into Cas hair. He pulled back and thumbed at the tears that drenched Cas cheeks, his own heart heavy with emotion as he said, “I would have always chose you and the boys in the end Cas. Always”.
Castiel leaned his forehead against Dean’s, just breathing the mans air in. He asked, “What if John comes back?”
Dean knew his father better than anyone. His father put up a tough guy exterior but in reality he didn’t have the balls nor brains to carry out anything menacing. He kissed the tip of Cas nose, “Don’t worry. He's spineless. He also knows that he can’t control us anymore but just for safety, I’ll get Sam to file a restraining order against him".
Castiel asked, “Do you think he'll abide by it?”
“Of course he will Castiel", Sam jumped in. “He really is spineless. All words, no action”.
Castiel smiled, “Ok. Thank you Sam".
“You’re welcome! I’ll leave you guys to it then", Sam clapped a hand on Dean’s back before he walked away, saying over his shoulder, “I’ll have that restraining order and the police alerted within the next hour".
Dean smiled at the blue eyed beauty who was looking at him like he had hung the moon. He flushed lightly, “What?”
“You stayed", Castiel whispered.
Dean kissed Castiel gently on the lips, “I’m staying for as long as you’ll have me Cas".
“Forever then?” Castiel teased.
They stood outside Dean’s apartment, hugging for God knows how long. That was until two vibrant voices that meant the world to both Dean and Castiel squealed in unison, “Daddy! Papa!”
Dean and Castiel chuckled as their sons hugged their waists.
Dean picked up a giggling Roman while Castiel heaved Ryder into his arms.
These two boys were Dean’s whole world. He bounced his little one in his arms, “Hey do you boys want to go see your room?”
Both brothers squealed excitedly, “Yeah!”
Everything was A-OK.
Please feel free to leave comments and/or kudos as it helps inspire me to keep writing :)
Today, Dean was emotional. Today marked a day of many more to come. It was the first day he was here to witness a milestone in his baby boys' lives. More so, the swarm of emotions that overtook him was mostly due to the fact that it made him remember- it made him remember that he wasn’t here for their births, for their first 4 birthdays, for their first walk, their first word.
Castiel obviously noticed how sentimental he was. The blue eyed beauty laid a palm on his shoulder, “Its ok honey. It’s ok to feel emotional on this day, but what matters is that you’re here, NOW. And I am so thrilled to have you as a part of our sons lives".
Dean smiled at Cas, leaning into his boyfriend's side, voice a little cracked as he replied, “Thank you baby for allowing me to be a part of our sons lives".
“Daddy! Papa! Where are your jammies?! IT’S A JAMMIES PARTY!” Roman said as he skipped up to his parents.
Dean and Cas both chuckled down at their youngest. Castiel murmured, “You chat him up and I’ll go get our jammies ready".
Dean crouched down, meeting his youngest at eye level, “Yup! Papa and I will get into our jammies soon, bubs".
Roman beamed. The little one then did a 360 turn, “Do you know what Jammie I’m wearing daddy?”
Just then Ryder stopped by his brothers side- obviously hearing what Roman had asked, repeating, “Yeah! Do you know what jammie's we wearing daddy!?”
Dean took in the teddy bear printed PJ's his sons had on. At first it didn’t come to him, but after some time, he came to a realization that made his eyes shine with tears and his heart squeeze in emotion. He replied thickly, “Yeah I remember babes. It’s the ones you wore when you first bumped into me".
Roman and Ryder glanced at each other- a secret message passing between them- next Dean knew, he was being engulfed in a warm hug – both his boys on a side each- fitting perfectly into his arms- laying their heads on each shoulder. Dean’s heart thrummed, holding his boys close to him, his tears finally rolling down his cheeks.
Roman murmured into his shoulder, “Don’t be upset daddy. You know we loves you".
“We loves you a lot!” Ryder repeated.
Dean sniffled, “I love you both- so so so much too".
They hugged for at least another minute before Ryder pulled away and peaked at his dad with a raised brow, “You loves papa too, right daddy?”
“Of course I do…very much bubba".
Ryder beamed while Roman pulled out of the hug and said with a big smile on his face, “We glad we ran into you daddy".
Dean thought of all the hurdles he had to get through to earn Cas trust and to be given the right to call Ryder and Roman his sons. It was certainly worth it. He smiled and laid a peck on each of his boys cheeks, “Well I’m glad you boys did run into MR. INCHESTER that day".
Both boys giggles was the most beautiful sound he has ever heard till date.
Sammy, Jessica, Charlie, Christopher & his parents, Blue (who was dressed in custom made teddy bear jammies) a few kids- who are friends of the boys, Castiel and Dean - were all dressed in jammies- as per the boys wish and requests. The boys had blown out their candles and were shoving cake into their mouths while everyone laughed and cheered.
The boys then ran over to Dean, where they jumped into their daddy's arms. Ryder blurting, “We’re so happy you’re here daddy!”
“Yeah!” Roman added.
It was safe to say that there wasn’t a dry eye in the room as the boys showered their dad with gratefulness and affection. Even Blue was wagging his tail happily.
“Happy 5th birthday, boys", Dean said with emotion as he held his precious jewels in his arms.
Castiel came to stand beside Dean, slipping an arm around Dean’s mid back, resting his chin on his shoulders. He asked, “So what did you boys wish for?”
“A new brother!” Ryder blurted which earned a laugh from everyone and a groan from Roman
“Ryder! You can’t say our wish!” Roman complained but the little ones face soon morphed into a big, sly smile, “So can we have a sister instead?”
“WHAT!? NOT A SISTER!” Ryder blurted.
“Well I don’t want another brother!” Roman retorted.
Dean and Castiel both chuckled. They glanced at each other sharing a smile.
“SO? CAN YOU GIVES US A SISTER?”
“OR BROTHER!?” Ryder added still shooting Roman the stink eye.
Castiel knew that Dean didn’t know what to actually say- heck they haven’t even explored the sexual part of their relationship yet because they had just started dating and had decided they take things slow. So he replied as honestly as he could, “Maybe someday boys but not anytime soon”. He rubbed at Dean’s shoulders, meeting his lovers smiling eyes, “So honey, shall we give these pumpkins a sister or a brother someday?”
“Oh hell yes”. Dean replied bouncing his sons in his arms.
Apparently, that was a satisfactory answer for the boys where they both squealed.
The next few hours were packed with family and friends joyfully celebrating. And Dean was so thrilled to be a part of it.
Forever and always.
A/N: I would like to thank all you wonderful readers who have been so supportive of this fic. It has indeed been a joy to write and I couldn't have honestly completed it without you ❤
It's sad that I have to end the fic, but I felt it was the right time to do so. Please keep in mind that there is always a possibility that I write a sequel 😏
Once again, thank you ❤❤❤
Please feel free to add any last comments and/or kudos 🙂