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the search to live honestly

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River bends over as the doctor turns around. He's always liked her arse in these trousers. Likes it better out of them, though.

"What are you going to do, Doctor?" She asks, looking coyly over her shoulder at him, "Spank me?"

The Doctor's eyes darken immediately, "I will," He nearly growls as he stalks towards her, a predatory look in his eyes. She doesn't move, simply stays in position, her front pressed over the railing as she stares at him. When he's next to her, his hand snakes into her curls and he tugs her head back just a bit, just enough, before his mouth descends to her ear, his breath hot and his voice heavy, "But only if you ask me like a good girl, River."

River's breath catches in her throat - she's always liked him like this and she hasn't seen it nearly enough. But there's something about that baby face giving her directives that just makes her insides roil with excitement. When he's like this, she'd ask him - beg him - for anything.

But not before playing with him a little bit, first. "Sweetie," Her voice is stern, even though it's breathy - as though she's not bent over, arse displayed for his pleasure, his fingers tangled in her curls, "I thought you liked to be told what to do," She smirks at him as his eyes flicker at the thought, because oh, he does.

His fingers tighten in her hair and he pulls - her eyes water a bit and she loves it; loves him possessive, loves him hers, loves him taking what he wants, especially when he wants her, "Normally, that's true - but right now," His teeth sink into her ear and she gasps, "Right now I want you to ask me, River. Beg me, just like the good girl I know you can be."

"Please," She whispers, her voice ragged and harsh. River Song does not beg, she does not plead - unless it's for him. He is always her exception.

"Please, what?" The Doctor asks, not willing to let her off the hook - there are few sounds he likes more in any universe than River Song begging for his hand against her arse. When she's silent, the Doctor smooths a hand over the curve of her arse, watching her face with curiosity as her nostrils flare. She leans into his hand and he chuckles, moving his hand away, "Please, what?" He asks again, more harshly this time.

At her silence, he loosens his grip on her curls, makes a sound of resignation in the back of his throat, turns like he's going to walk away from her - but his eyes stay on her face and he sees it. He sees the moment she gives in, the moment she decides to ask him for exactly what she wants - what they both want, really, and more than either of them had ever thought possible.

"Please... spank me, Doctor," She utters the words like a secret, and his grip tightens in her hair again like a promise. She can be this with him, here - she can be vulnerable, wanton, she can ask him for what she needs. It's the only time she can and the power of that makes both of them dizzy sometimes when they think about it.

"Oh," The Doctor marvels the way he always marvels at River Song begging him, "What a good, good girl you are, River," His hand smooths over her arse again, gently, and she leans into his touch, arching her back, "And so eager."

“Trousers on or off, River?" The Doctor asks, his voice low and rough, still right in her ear.

River whimpers and the sound echoes around the TARDIS; it sounds pleading and dirty to both their ears, "Off," She answers, "I want to feel your hand on my skin." She shakes her head what little she can with his tight grip on her hair, "I need to feel your hand on my skin, Doctor," She amends, and when he tugs on her hair again in a silent reminder, she groans, "Please."

"Then take them off," The Doctor releases her curls, stands just far enough back to get a full view, "Now."

River moves to stand, to bring her back upright, but the doctor surges forward, reaches his arm out and presses it against her back, pushing her back down, "No," His fingers gently caress her spine, "Stay like this, bent over so I can see."

River nods once, and when the Doctor is satisfied she won't move, he removes his hand, stepping back, his eyes trailing over her frame. River's hands move to the button of her trousers and she undoes it slowly, her hands not as steady as they usually are because she really does love him like this and every ounce of arousal it sparks in her is flooding through her veins right now. She drags down her fly, careful to keep her chest pressed against the railing as she works her trousers - so tight - down and over her hips.

She feels the cool air on her skin as her trousers reveal her naked arse. He likes her bare under everything, and there's just something about shooting a gun without any knickers on that always gets her going.

She stops when her trousers are midway down her thighs and lets them fall to the floor. She moves to step out of them, but the Doctor's voice stops her. "No," He orders firmly, "Leave them," She can hear the arousal in his voice, knows it so well by now, "But spread your legs, River, far as they'll go like this."

River obeys, spreading her legs as wide as they'll go and she can feel the Doctor's gaze burning into her; she can always tell when he's watching her, and she knows there are very few things he likes more than seeing her spread out for him like this. "Good girl," The Doctor breathes, stepping up behind her. His hand hovers over her arse, but he does not touch her and when she moves to back into his hand, he backs away, "You know better than that," He scolds, and she nods, leaning forward over the railing – because she does know better than that.

"For that, you'll need to ask me again, River," His finger trails idly down her spine and a shiver runs through her, "Beg me again."

She does. She does not hesitate this time, the arousal thick in her blood now, "Please, Doctor," She says the word on a moan, "Please spank me - please."

The Doctor chuckles, the sound low and throaty as he reaches his hand out and trails a finger slowly down over her arse until he reaches her cunt. He slips his fingertip inside, feels her wetness and smirks, "How hard do you want it tonight, River?" He asks, and she knows he doesn't just mean the spanking.

River resists the urge to rock back into him, to draw his finger deeper into herself, knows she won't get what she wants if she does. "Hard," She answers, her voice gruff and full of sin, "So hard, Doctor."

The Doctor moves his hand up, smoothing it over her arse, and River looks back over her shoulder. He's staring at her skin reverently, with such awe, like he can't believe he's the one who gets to touch her - to see her - like this. He's the only one who does.

"Only for you, River," He whispers, his hand still caressing her skin, and she smiles - can't help it, because he's still a sentimental idiot even when he has her spread, arse out, begging for him to spank her over the railing of his TARDIS.

She bites back a reply, too worried about drawing his wrath because she needs this tonight. Needs to feel the Doctor’s palm stinging against her skin as she cries out, as she begs for more. "Please," She whimpers the word and his eyes darken again, his nostrils flare, and oh - there he is.

The first hard slap rings out without further warning and River cries out, feeling that pleasure-pain course through her because the Doctor knows just what she needs, exactly when she needs it. It's harder than any first slap he's given her and how much he's learned about her body thrills her, turns her on.

"River," His tone is warning even as his palm smooths over the place on her arse he just struck.

She moans, knowing what he wants, loving that he wants it – that she wants to give it, “Thank you,” She whispers, and as soon as she does, three successive hard spanks come, followed quickly by his soothing palm over her flesh.

"More?" The Doctor asks, his hand gliding over her skin. River nods, remaining still, fighting the urge again to push herself into his hand, to beg without words. He wants her words, and there is nothing he wants that she won't give him, her Doctor.

"Please," She nods.

The Doctor laughs, his hand still caressing the skin of her arse, "Then say thank you, River - like a good girl, remember?”

River does move now, tries to soothe the intense ache between her legs, tries to no avail to press against something, anything, and even as she does she worries that the Doctor will stop, but he doesn't. Instead, his hand dips lower, his long fingers slicking through her swollen flesh, and she cries out, feeling on the edge of coming undone from that simple touch alone. "Thank you," She says, "More, please." And she doesn't even know what she's begging for this time - just more, more of anything at his hands.

"Oh," The Doctor says the word on a groan, "There's my good girl," His hand comes up and he slaps her arse hard once, twice, three times and he does not stop except to smooth his hand over her red flesh after every third slap, "There's my good, good girl."

River moans, whimpers, cries out - biting her fist to muffle her cries, and she speaks against her hand, her voice heavy with arousal, with desire, with release because she needs this, wants it from him, has long since stopped feeling ashamed of it, "Thank you, thank you, thank you," She speaks after each swift spank, feels the tears sting at the corners of her eyes but it hurts the way she needs it to, the way it only can from the Doctor, tinged with every ounce of trust and love between them. It’s a good pain, and she’s had so little of that in her life, "Thank you, my love," She finally whispers, and the Doctor stops, his hand gentling over her warm, red skin and his lips soon follow.

His lips trail warm, soft, gentle kisses over her flesh as he murmurs praise against her - variations of 'good girl,' and 'so sweet,' and 'my River, mine - only, always, mine,' and River turns her head over her shoulder to see him, to watch him thank her this time.

River smiles when she feels his lips move lower, feels them slide gently, sweetly over her skin until his lips find her cunt. “So wet, River,” He marvels, lips flush against her skin as he speaks, and then he’s kissing her, his tongue darting out to taste her and she cries out.

She’s always loved this angle, loved the way his tongue feels like this as it delves inside of her, tasting her, fucking her.

“Sweetie,” She moans, arching her back up and turning over her shoulder again to look at him – all she can see is his hair, the top of his head as he murmurs praise against her cunt now, his words as sweet as his tongue as he laps at her.

He’s on his knees – this centuries old Time Lord is on his knees behind her, his face buried in her and River knows she needs this too. And so does he.

River arches further back and grabs the back of his head, holding him against her, and his words are muffled but she can feel the vibrations of them against her as he speaks and she breathes out hard, rocking back into his face before she pulls his head back and shifts her body forward, just out of his reach because it’s his turn to beg now.

And he knows it, does not disappoint – the minute his lips are off of her, he pleads with her as her fingers thread in his hair, tugging him back. “Please, River,” He begs, his voice filled with arousal; he loves begging as much as he loves to be begged, “Please let me,” He says, his face suffusing with red.

River smirks at the sight – something about the Doctor blushing as he’s on his knees behind her makes her stomach fill with heat, “Let you what, Doctor?” She asks, because she wants to hear him say it – wants to hear her Doctor beg for her cunt tonight.

“Let me lick you, River, please,” He groans the words out and she knows if she could see his trousers, they’d be tented.

River moves back, pushing his head gently towards her and he licks her once before she pulls forward again. His eyes flit up to her face and she arches a brow at him, a slow smirk spreading across her face. His eyes are alight with every kind of desire for her and it’s heady – but he smirks back, licking his lips to taste her again.

“Thank you,” He whispers, voice rough and dark with want, with need – and, she knows, all for her.

River gasps – she’ll never get over hearing him thank her for allowing him to taste her, “Good boy,” She murmurs, her fingers lightly scraping over his scalp. When the words fall into his ears and his eyes darken and he lets out a groan of approval because he loves this game just as much as she does, no matter which way they play it, she curls her fingers tightly into his hair and pushes him forward at the same time she leans back.

His mouth covers her from behind and she holds him there as his tongue laps at her, dives into her, licking at her furiously as he makes noises of approval in the back of his throat because he loves this, too.

Her trousers are still around her ankles and she steps out of one leg of them and spreads her legs wider, pulling the Doctor’s face deeper into her and she feels him smile against her skin as his fingers come up between her legs and circle her clit.

He’s so dexterous in this body, his fingers long, and they know just how to work her as his tongue slides in and out of her, guided by her hand in his hair.

The Doctor doesn’t stop speaking against her skin – begging, she realizes through a thick fog of arousal – as her pleasure begins to crest in her body, threatening to spill over.

He’s begging her even as he licks at her, his face buried in her cunt, and his words are so muffled she can only hear every other word or so but it doesn’t take her long to realize that he’s begging her to come, to ‘please come, River, please, please come for me, come on my tongue,’ and then he’s thanking her for using him like this and she feels the heat sliding through her body – on the edge, she’s right on the edge and it’s one of her favorite places to be with him.

His fingers circle her clit rapidly, and he’s not teasing her anymore, and she’s not teasing him either, so she pulls his face into her and rocks against him hard, fucking herself on his tongue while his fingers work and he begs her to ‘please, please come,’ and she does.

River comes with her back arched as she writhes against him, holding his head firmly in place – she cries out, his name falling from her lips and the pleasure rolling through her in a thick wave is as mesmerizing and potent as the edge of the universe, her voice an echo in the TARDIS like she may someday be – but she doesn’t care.

She only cares about his mouth on her cunt, his tongue inside of her, licking as he murmurs against her skin.

She shudders, her back still arched, but she relaxes her grip on his head – he does not stop licking her, his face still buried as he laps at her.

River moans, bending back over the railing, opening herself up to him, “Good boy,” She whispers, reaching back to run her fingers reverently through his hair.

The Doctor finally pulls away, and she turns to look at him – he stares at her, his eyes swirling with things she can read clearly, and does. His chin is slick, his mouth is red, and he’s smirking at her, “Thank you,” He says, licking his lips again as he brings the back of his hand to his chin.

“Sweetie,” River whispers, stepping fully out of her trousers and turning around; she presses her lower back into the railing as she reaches her hand down and helps him up from his knees, tugging him into her. Her fingers hook into his braces and she pulls him against her roughly.

He bends his head and she kisses him, her tongue sliding into his mouth – she tastes herself there, and she moans, her fingers gliding up over his chest to his bowtie. She undoes the knot carefully, expertly, like she’s done it a thousand times and she has.

She strips him until he stands before her in nothing but his desire for her, his chest heaving as he watches her with dark eyes as she pulls her shirt over her head, smirking as his eyes flicker down to her bare breasts.

The Doctor loves her naked for him, and his eyes scan her body slowly as she smirks, “We already know how I want you tonight, Doctor,” She speaks in a low tone, her voice coated with desire, “Hard,” She drops her gaze between his legs, chuckling when he flushes, “But how do you want me?”

The Doctor swallows, and he raises his eyebrows at her in silent question – when River nods, relinquishing control back to him, he steps forward until his bare chest is pressed up against hers.

“You made such a pretty picture for me bent over like that, River,” His finger comes up to trail along her bottom lip – she licks at it and tastes herself again, “I’d like to have you like that – bent over the railing as I slam into you. Is that how you want it, my good girl?”

River nods and closes her eyes, her breath coming in shallow pants already, “Please,” She breathes the word out and she can feel him smirk without even opening her eyes.

“Look at me when you beg,” The Doctor instructs, and River’s eyes snap open.

“Please,” She breathes again, her eyes focused on his, watching the lust cloud them over.

The Doctor reaches out and grabs her by the arms – he turns her around, rough and yet somehow gentle at the same time in only the way he can ever be with her, and walks her forward until her abdomen hits the railing. He grabs her wrists behind her back with one hand and pushes her down over the railing with the other.

“Oh, look at you,” He murmurs, leaning forward and pressing a kiss against the nape of her neck – he breathes her in, sweat and gun smoke and everything he doesn’t deserve but somehow still gets to have – “Look at you,” He whispers again, his fingers sliding languidly up her spine until his fingers curl into her hair. River likes this – likes his hand in her hair, pulling, tugging, yanking. “My good girl, spread out for me,” He keeps his grip on her wrists firm, pulling back to look at her, “A bit more,” He nudges her legs apart with his knee, and surveys her, smiling in appreciation of the sight before him.

He steps forward and lets her wrists go, “Don’t move your hands, River,” He warns in a tone that tells her she won’t like what happens if she does, and then he grasps himself at his base and moves forward, rubbing himself against her, “Is this what you want?” He whispers, leaning down to speak into her ear the way he knows she likes best, “Hm?” He breathes into her ear and she shudders, nodding her head, “You want me to fuck you, River? Hard?” When she nods again, he smirks against her ear, “That’s what good girls need, is it?” He groans, sliding just a bit into her, “That’s what you need, isn’t it?”

River tries to rock back into him but his hand on her lower back halts her – and she knows what he wants, “Yes,” She nods, still pushing against his hand on her lower back, “Yes, it’s what I need, Doctor – I need you – please, I need you to fuck me.”

The Doctor pulls out of her, his thumb drawing swirling patterns on her lower back, “Like what, River?” He pushes into her only a bit further than before, but it’s not enough because she needs more – she needs him to give her more.

She groans, “Like a good girl,” She moans, dropping her head forward so he can pull it back by her hair, “Fuck me like a good girl, Doctor – please.”

Even as she says them she knows they’re the magic words – and if you’d have told her a century ago that she’d be begging for someone to fuck her, she’d have shot you just to have fun hiding the body – but it’s what she needs now, from him, what she craves and he’s the only one she trusts to give it to her.

And he does give it to her – at her words, the Doctor slams into her, no trace of gentleness now as he yanks her hair back so hard her eyes water and she loves it, she loves him. He pulls out of her and roughly slams back in and she keeps her wrists crossed behind her back because he told her to; she wants to brace herself against something, but she doesn’t.

The Doctor’s mouth finds her neck and he licks her, sucks at her skin, sinks his teeth into her until she cries out.

River needs to know she can always ask for things and he will give them to her, “Harder,” She begs, even as he slams into her again and again.

His fingers disentangle from her hair and his hands find her hips and he steadies her, his fingertips digging into her skin and she know there will be half-moon bruises there, but it’s her favorite constellation these days, so she just begs for more, begs him to fuck her harder and he does – her Doctor does.

River’s wrists are still crossed at her back just like he’d arranged them, and the Doctor leans in to her ear, “Such a good girl, River, always doing what you’re told,” She whimpers in response because she is – she is a good girl, and only ever for him, “Do you want to touch yourself?” He asks, “Do you want to come again, River?” His teeth nip at her ear and his rhythm is fast and so, so hard, “Do you deserve to come again? Have you been good enough, do you think?”

The Doctor’s hands still hold her in place as he fucks her and she whimpers, “Yes,” Her whimper morphs into a moan as he slams into her, “It’s so good, Doctor – I’m – I’m so good for you, so good only for you.” She sounds so breathless and needy, but she doesn’t care, only cares about the feel of him roughly sliding into her, “Please let me touch myself – please, please let me come.”

He hums in agreement, his voice still in her ear, his hands still steadying her as he pounds into her, “You are a good girl – touch yourself like one, River. Come for me.”

River doesn’t wait, she moves her hands from her lower back and drops one down to her clit; with the other, she rolls her nipple, her back arching up and towards the Doctor.

She can feel herself start to tumble over the edge, but she can’t quite get there even as the Doctor murmurs filth in her ear. Filth he would have blushed at when he was younger – filth he sometimes still blushes at, but oh he’s so good at it, the dirty things he says.

“I can’t,” She whimpers, and if she sounds pathetic and wanton, she doesn’t care because she needs to come, needs to feel the Doctor come inside of her, “I can’t – sweetie, I need – I can’t,” She pleads for something just out of her reach, she doesn’t even understand what.

“Shh,” The Doctor soothes, and he knows what she needs, he always knows what she needs, “You can, River, and you will.”

A protest is on her tongue – she felt it crawl up her throat, but it doesn’t make it past her lips because the Doctor keeps his steady, hard rhythm as he fucks her. He leaves one hand on her hips, his fingers curling into her flesh, but he moves the other one and River doesn’t have time to think, doesn’t have time to speak before the Doctor brings his hand down against her arse, hard.

She cries out, clenching in pleasure around him because it hurts, but it feels so good – and he does it again, smoothing the flesh before he does it again, and again, and again timing each slap of his hand with his thrusts and River screams in pleasure as she feels herself crest right up to the edge again.

“That’s it, my good girl,” The Doctor says, bringing his hand down again, harder this time, “I know what you need,” His hand smooths her red skin and he spanks her again, just as hard, “I always know what you need.”

He spanks her three more times, the sound of his palm slapping against her arse echoing around the TARDIS, and River comes hard, her eyes rolling back into her head as her mouth opens but no sound comes out.

She clenches around the Doctor as he fucks her, his hand moving back to her hips now as he slams into her over and over again. She finally moans, and thrusts back against him, rocking into him as his rhythm falters, becomes unsteady but still just as hard.

And River knows what he needs too, “Come for me, sweetie,” She whispers into the air; he needs to know it’s alright – needs to hear her ask, “Please come for me,” She moans as the Doctor’s breathing hitches, “Please come inside me, Doctor.”

The Doctor cries out in pleasure then, slamming into her once more and staying buried inside her while her name spills from his lips – ‘River, so good – my good girl, my good, good girl,’ before he thrusts erratically a few times as the pleasure washes through him.

Finally, he slumps over her, his teeth biting gently into her shoulder as he speaks against her skin, murmuring and she hums in contentment, even though the position is far from comfortable. His chest is against her back, and River thinks this might be all she ever needs – bent over a railing, her Doctor whispering against her skin.

But he gives her so much more even than that.

“Sweetie,” River whispers – and she doesn’t have to say anything else.

“Oh,” He smiles, pressing a gentle kiss to her shoulder before he stands up, his fingers drifting up her sides as he gently lifts her up and turns her around to face him.

She smiles at him as his hand reaches up to her face – his fingers skate along her cheek bone, gliding down her face until his thumb dances across her bottom lip.

“River,” He whispers, and she wonders how she never knew that worlds and universes and every good thing could be contained in the way someone says her name. In the way he says her name.

The Doctor leads her wordlessly to the shower on the TARDIS – the big one with a thousand settings he wouldn’t know how to use if he tried. He guides her into the stall and turns the water on – hot, just like she likes it – and he washes her body, his fingers skating over her slick skin, massaging the conditioner into her hair, kissing her sweetly beneath the steady stream of water that smells faintly like citrus.

When he leads her to the bed after having dried her off, he holds the sheets back for her and she climbs inside. He follows her, and then curls around her, his arm slung protectively over her waist and River smiles – her hair is still damp on the pillow, but the Doctor buries his nose into it anyway.

Only the Doctor ever gets River Song naked and spread out and begging all at once – and only he gets her like this – only he makes her like this: soft and sweet, his good girl wrapped in his arms - happy.