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Boomerang Effect

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Dear Luna,

Hi, it's me, Luna. You are the first person I'm writing to for now, to remind you that no matter what happens : you are the person I care the most about.
Do you remember when, a few months ago, you were attacked by a man on a random street who wanted you, even if you didn't want him ? You can't even remember his face, but you know you dream about him every night. You dream about his shouts, about how hard his punches were, about the sounds of your bones breaking. He beat you almost to death, Luna.

And sometimes, not all the time, because you're awfully good at avoiding painful issues ; you dream about what angered him. About him trying to ask you out - but you shouldn't call this "asking someone out" really, because he wasn't, he was already trying to have some power over you - and you saying "You're not exactly what I'm looking for", trying to put on a cheeky smile. And you think that it's your fault. You think "I should have said that I was in a hurry. Or that I already had a boyfriend. But not this. Never this." But the thing is, he would have punched anyway. Maybe the fact that you're a lesbian and are not what women are supposed to be - docile creatures made for men's sexual pleasure - frustrated him even more, maybe. But that's not why he hurt you. He didn't hurt you because you made a mistake. He hurt you because he's an horrible human being. That's the unique reason. Please remember that. Please remember that I love you, too.

Don't think that because you/I wrote this, you're okay now. You're not, you will be, but you're not. You haven't "made peace" with it, and to be honest you shouldn't. Be angry, be sad, feel. Just don't hurt yourself.

Now let's talk about what happened next. You thought you were dying, I think you were, and you saw faces. You didn't recognize them at first, and then you knew. You knew who they were and how important they could be in your life, if they wanted to. Maybe you wouldn't be able to be with all of them, maybe just with one of them, maybe with a few of them. However, you could feel that you had to try. When you saw your body lying on the ground, your hair covered with blood, your body looking like a shattered, fragile, piece of paper ; you felt some parts of your soul crumbling, falling, drowning in the depths of the universe. You saw your body being taken to an hospital, you saw Harry, and all your friends, arrive. You heard Harry singing some beautiful song which sounded like thunderstorm, while he was holding your hand. And I was born. The Luna who knew more than ever that life was something to cherish. That you shoud be cherished by someone. By the whole world. I often disappear for a while, I'm sorry. I'm not here to remind you that you matter. That's why I wrote this, so it can more concrete. More real. To anchor you, like food can do.

When you died, there was no voice to tell you to stay alive. It doesn't mean that this voice doesn't exist, it means that your life only belongs to you.

Remember that you came back on your own. You're magical.