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trollhunting with your troll

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Arcadia. Home to many. In this world trolls and humans live together without fear. Trolls can go into the sunlight (cause why not) Jim is the only hybrid in the world (Merlin or the ‘intense drama’ of the show don’t apply, its a ‘just go with it and have fun’ thing) and hes the first ever omega trollhunter. A big 3 new records he holds as trollhunter! Omega, human, then hybrid! Many old trollhunters don’t approve, oh well who cares about some old dusty ghosts feelings right?. Kanjigar watches over and guides Jim and his son on this strange thing called life. (he’s going to be straight up Mufasa this bitch)

With no real threats and fighting, things are pretty laid back. Sure the occasional goblin or gnome problem or settling nasty troll disputes, other than that, things are all good. Jim has proven himself time and time again to everyone, yet some still don’t fully ‘enjoy’ the fact of what Jim is, an omega trollhunter, (they don’t give Af about him being a hybrid). Still, he isn’t put down by comments and mean glares and the occasional cat call from some big brute alpha, HIS big brute alpha usually slams them to the ground until they apologize and promise to never again talk like that.

Draal Is now the permanent mate to Jim. A while back when they first became mates, Draal did a ‘troll proposal’ (something you will have to find out what that means in a future chapter!) and the two got mating carvings, a permanent thing to carve into your body, signifying your eternal courtship. What are those? Well they are symbols carved into you that match each other. (going to just base this off of how trolls get tattoos.) Kinda the troll equivalent of getting a heart with the other persons name on it. He has about as much love for Jim, his friends, his family really, as big as his body.

Barbara and Walt are happily married, and have been so for a few years now. It was very awkward at first, but what isn’t?. The four live together in their big loving home. Jim has come to really love Walt as his step father, meanwhile Draal….

Well the two don’t always see ‘eye to eye’. Meaning Draal still doesn’t trust the ‘impure’.
“This ‘wedding ring’ must be cursed! The Bar Bruh ah (how it’s spelled in the books whenever he says her name) must be under his spell! Why else would she fall for him?!”
“Love Draal”
“I don’t think it’s that simple.”
“Well technically love isn’t simple, so yeah I guess you’re right about it not being simple”

Walt can still switch between forms (why? Just go with it.)
Notenrique (and from now on, just to make it easier, I’m just going to call him Noten.)
lives with his ‘big sister’ Claire along with her parents and the actual baby Enrique.

Arrrg (yes, that’s how I’m going to spell it, easier) And Blinky are happily troll married. They gay Af. Living in trollmarket, and within their ‘loving home’ lives Blinky’s blind brother, Dic (yep. that’s how I’m saying it, 1 you know him. And 2, easier to spell)

Vendel is alive and chillin out in the heartstone, so that’s cool.
I guess this would Technically be at the end of the ‘cannon’, but whatever it’s my Au so it don’t matter much! Here to have fun! Not stress out!.

All the friends are together being...well friends, doing what friends do.
Everyone's aged up, why? Cause not really into underage stuff, anyways they all go to college together, and the teachers are there. why? My Au, just shut up and enjoy it XD.

Steve and Eli are dating, they gay AF for each other. Deal with it. Boyfriends gotta Creepslay together bruh!

Jim is the only hybrid, and everyone's chill about it and no one cares, trolls are common and so on. Plus Au. Does the janus order exist? Idk, doesn’t matter atm.

Draal has a nasty habit of “oh oh! Let me help! I can fix it!” at home, but just makes it so much worse. Oh well, they all love him and he tries his best. He loooves when Barbara gives him approval and love. It makes him feel like hes doing a great job being a big blue boy! He also wants her to love him because hes Jim’s mate. What proper mate doesn’t try to be kind to his parents mother? A monster that’s who! And not the good kind!

Barbara wants her boys to just get along. Jim is usually the bumper between the big blue boy and old knife man when Barbara isn’t around. (THIS IS CANNON!) Jim has his own little garden where he grows fresh vegetables. (they said in the books that its in the backyard). Now, its a fun little family garden for the four of them.

Jim’s room is way bigger, cause the two need room! Also sometimes when Jim gets mad at Draal and kicks him out of the nest, Draal slinks to the basement downstairs to sulk. He is the type to always blame himself, even if Jim Is the one to have caused the argument. He always makes sure to improve himself when he messes up though. He wants to make Jim happy, and vice versa of course. The basement is bigger and has a large storage with many of Draal’s weapons (AU! Expect that answer to every question)

He also has the nasty habit of ‘collecting’ the things he loves, like regular trolls. So there will be things like tiny lights, a few dozen rolled up carpets he never intends to unroll, a mountain of home paint cans, opened and UN-opened, he ONLY lets them be used if Barbara wants to. No one else gets to touch. Not much of a problem since no one plans on re painting the house. A large amount of unopened sunflower seed packets (he loves the sound of them shaking), and honestly, etc. (prob am just gonna end up saying a bunch of other rando junk too).

Big blue ball boy has a few other nasty habits.
1. ‘in appropriate dinner conversations’. Including but not limited to:
saying how well he properly breeds Jim, he wants to make sure everyone knows that he is NOT a selfish lover.
Talking about how he has skillfully disemboweled opponents and in which ways.
Talking about the cats he ate while digging through garbage bins, and what he FOUND in said garbage bins (no detail spared)
and other such things.

2. charging at the mailman thinking hes an opponent trying to break into their home.
“DIIIEEEEE”
“NO DRAAL NO!” Jim has to get in his way and stop him from going after the now screaming and running away mailman.
At least now he no longer does it...he still watches him though. With zero trust.
“He comes here everyday at the same time. he’s studying us for weaknesses.”
“No Draal, that’s just his job”
“I don’t buy it.”

3. eating Jim’s cloths. Yes, Jim has found him more than once having a snack of his worn cloths. To Draal, they taste like how we taste candy or cakes. Poor Jim has to spend so much on re-buying his cloths. At least he knows how to lock them up or hide them now. Yes, Draal can never truly figure out how to undo baby proofed things. (I’m not trying to make him dumb, just funny dofus)

4. Leaving his weapons lying around. More than once has someone tripped and even hurt themselves.

5. following Jim around when he isn’t supposed to. Jim loves him and loves being with him. What Jim DOESN’T like is seeing Draal ‘sneak’ around the college trying to find him.
“What are you doing here?? go home!”
“I’m lonely, and I’m bored.”
“Go to trollmarket!”
“Blink and Arrrg aren’t for guests right now.”
“of course not. Go fight someone then!”
“OKAY!”
“NO NOT HERE!”

5. roaring at cars who honk at him

6. falling into a deep sleep post orgasm on top of Jim. A firetruck could hit Draal and he wouldn’t even budge. Jim isn’t hurt, just stuck...and bored. Thankfully he has his phone! Oh shit it died. Well, guess he can sleep...

7. watching soap operas when is isn’t supposed to.
You heard me right. Soap operas. He ALWAYS tries his hardest to study human courtship so he can better improve himself to his love~. However its a TERRIBLE place to learn about love. He also loves the ‘human drama’ and watching them interact.
“This one fleshbag woman said to another that ‘she stuffed her bra to look bigger’. I do not see how she has gained size from a bra.”
“These two fleshbag woman are fighting over the same man. If this were trolls, they would fight to the death to prove who is more worthy than a mate, instead these two...what did they say...’talk shit get hit’ yet I see little fighting, only backstabbing.”

the family tries to not let him watch much, or else pick up bad habits.

8. not understanding something and bringing it up, typically at terrible times.
“Ba bruh ah, what is a MILF? I heard someone call you one”
“What is dabbing and why does Toby keep asking me to do it?”
“the other day they asked me what an ‘up dog’ was. I asked what’s up dog, they all laughed and cheered.”
“one fleshbag woman called a man a cuckhold….what is that?”

9. overall being a big fun rowdy boy.

10. trying to make ‘home improvements’ without telling anyone. When a troll has a mate and they plan on having whelps down the line, the alpha will typically dig and create a bigger cave, making a nicer more comfortable larger living space to rely on for the soon to be whelp raising. (Jim and Draal DO plan on having kids, just not now. Jim isn’t ready, Draal ALWAYS respects Jim)

11. always leaving messes everywhere, he has to constantly be reminded to clean up, he says sorry and does so right away, and makes it spotless!.

(and other random stuff I’ll come up with later on).

Jim isn’t too ‘pure’ himself.
HIS nasty habits consists of
1. eating things when hes not supposed to. With Draal, he always just eats the garbage and leftovers and literally anything they plan on throwing away. So he’s one big troll disposal system. Jim however, he will eat paperwork or too many utensils or actually chew and eat his pillows and blankets. More than once has he woken up to literally having cotton mouth. He also eats his pencils by mistake. Plenty of times where he’s chewed on a pencil trying to figure out something, then doesn’t realize that hes eaten it. Plenty of times where hes cooking, tastes a spoon and eats it without realizing it. (yes, in this AU he CAN make and eat good food.)

2.He does go a bit feral at times. He will bite you if you get all up in his face sometimes. Usually he only goes to his more ‘troll’ side when hes under heavy stress, typically when he’s in heat and very emotional. They go to the extremes. One minute hes wanting to be pet and laying on the couch, the next he might think someone’s trying to disturb his nest and he will go totally off the wall attack mode. Only seeing red and having a hard time ‘remembering’ who’s who.
‘protect nest! Drive off intruders!’
‘aggressive! Bite back!’
‘don’t let them come into your territory!’
he always feels awful for what he did after that. Always apologizing constantly and cries into a pillow before eating it.

3. his heat’s are EXTREME. when in heat, his emotions are off the charts, he gets very...tense. Growling and irritated at most things. He just wants a ‘calm no sudden movements, quiet, relaxed’ atmosphere. Or he WILL get bitey bitey.
He also is constantly wanting affection and attention. He always just wants to cuddle and be pet, or almost always just stay around Draal~. When Draal is near, he can calm Jim down easily, making things under control. When he isn’t, Jim gets a bit...paranoid, more tensed up, anxious, etc.
more than once has he growled when someone tries to come to close to his food.

4. he does shed a lot at times, hairballs and clogged showers are common.

5. he will pout and sulk in his nest, being a big grumpy fluff ball. Eating food while having the blanket over him. Watching sad things and having a terrible pity party.

 

Walt is always there for them, always making sure he’s available when needed. He’s the college dean and does his job well. Everyone knows hes a changeling and no body cares. Same with Nomura, shes still at the museum doing her thing. Barbara still works at the hospital and overall is still the same.

Toby and Arrrg don’t live together, although Arrrg does visit often. Blinky visits often, except is the type to just randomly drop by at any time without telling anyone first. Nobody minds, they expect the random visit from him at any given moment. Other than that, for the time being everything is the same as it is in cannon, unless I think of something else to add. If I do, I’ll just say the ‘update’ in the notes on future chapters. Anyways let’s begin the fun!

…………………...

“Names Jim, but you already knew that. Normal is a fun thing around Arcadia. Everything is simple and dumb. Just how we like it.
Nothing says happy family like a loving human mother, a once head of the janus order changeling step-father, a hybrid son who’s the trollhunter, and a big blue ball boi troll. The ‘typical’ day consists of my friends and I hanging out, going to college, doing dumb ‘do it for the vine’ style things. We go shopping, go to the movies, walk around and watch sunsets. Pretty mundane, but we do know how to be reckless and keep it lively around here.”

“My two best friends are Toby and Claire, both human Betas. Steve, an alpha human, and Eli, omega human, are probably one of my favorite couples, they know how to have fun and nerd out. In no way are they the type to just want to watch the clock tick by. If its not ‘searching for cryptids’ or watching over the top fighting anime or going on the occasional date night, they’re usually with our friend group.
Darci, Mary, and Shannon, all human betas, are all apart of our fun stupid happy go lucky group. Nothing says excitement like a bunch of dumb college students doing memes and crying over school together.”

“My two ‘adopted’ troll dads Arrrg and Blinky take good care of me, helping me train and learn and yadda yadda. Funny, at times my mom and Blinky argue over me.
‘He should be doing this’
‘no he should be doing this’
Or sometimes I’ve gotten hurt and mom, being the doctor she is, helps me. Meanwhile Blinky feels that ‘human medicine’ sometimes isn’t good enough compared to trolls. The two get along great but bump heads from time to time. All in a usual days work I suppose.”

“I try not to cause too much trouble and help my ‘fellow troll’ out, being the trollhunter and all it’s kinda my job anyways. Still I don’t usually complain about it, I love it! Especially now that I don’t usually have life threatening events going on anymore. Grumpy old goat man Vendel tries to put up with our shit. He cares, but hes grumpy. He needs a long nap and tea. And a vacation.”
“If I left trollmarket for even a single day, nothing but anarchy would occur!” while he is a stubborn old goat, his heart is always there for everyone. “

“Most people like me, I’m kind and friendly and ready to help!. There are still enough though that see me as a mistake. A misfit, well I love being one. Why be some boring typical person when I can be the fun misguided weirdo chillin like a villain. Being an omega, I do get ‘cat called’ by the bigger brute alphas. I share my words, Draal shares his fists, and horns, and ax. Anyone who’s smart though, knows not to say shit to me. Or at least not out loud when I’m nearby.”

“My training is fun, dangerous, but fun. Beats slumping over math problems yawning and trying to stay awake. Nothing wakes you up more than having a giant blade slice past your head. Also having fun spars with my friends, lighten up the mood, get competitive, make a game out of it. Good exercise too!. Nothing feels nicer than going home after a long day, kicking off your shoes, eating something good, hot shower, get cozy in your nest, and just hangout. Until your big troll mate comes into the room and wants to get cozy in the nest too~. Or actually just relax with you. My life is great, only things I have to really worry about is keeping everyone from dying, making sure that humans and trolls don’t try to kill each other and fight often, preventing my mate from killing my step father and everyone else as well, and making sure I stay sane. Easy peasy right?.”

 

“right now I’m sitting at the dinner table next to my mate, and across from my mom and walt. Those two are so sweet to one another and the romance is never dead. On their side, they share thoughts and ideas, talk about and drink wine. Plan out date nights or just something fun. Meanwhile on my side, I’m next to my mate who eats like hes on death row, wolfing down everything in sight. Including actual silverware. He’s messy, very messy, at least he is more than willing to clean up after himself.

He’s hardly ever satisfied with the ‘usual’ dinners I make. He, like most troll’s, are NOT picky eaters. So we just round up whatever leftovers or things we don’t want anymore, put it in front of him, and watch him go. Within minutes a pile of food will disappear, leaving only minor amounts of anything that missed his mouth leftover. The only evidence showing what was once there, is now in the stomach of a troll. I do eat a LOT more than when I was human, and hey, some garbage DID taste good, but I got sick quickly, sometimes literally, of stuff. So I almost always stick to regular food. it’s also nice to just eat whatever wrapper I have left over from whatever was inside of it, no need to worry about throwing it away!.

The big brute can eat a ton! So we always make sure to stock up on plenty of stuff, another thing we don’t need to worry about is throwing away any thing we don’t have need for. Like plastic wrappers, or bags, or moldy food, or anything expired, and you get the idea. When something gets too old or worn down, chow time!. Only problem with his big appetite is that he tends to bring home his ‘own food’. We made him promise to stop eating cats. I won’t go into the details, but my point is he’s switched over to the food we provide. One time I found him eating an old tire we had in the garage, not a problem, we didn’t need it. Another pro than con, easy cleanup everywhere! Between the massive strength he has to help move things around like they were nothing, and the stomach to match, hardly anything was difficult to move around or get rid of.

Another bad thing his stomach tells him to do is eat my cloths. Not just the socks, but ALL of my dirty cloths. Apparently to him it tastes just like how cake and candy is to us. I’ve spent more money replacing cloths than most other things. Well, on the bright side, I grew out of pretty much everything. So a good excuse to go shopping. I’ve caught him red handed and told him to spit out what he hasn’t chewed. He always has that ‘shame’ look on his face, like a dog when they know they’ve done something bad. You can just never stay mad at the big dog. we’ve ‘baby proofed’ a lot of things around the house. He has a hard time getting into things, without breaking them of course. Either way it deters him from trying anything. He isn’t bad or anything, just a big doofus. He’s my doofus though, and our little family wouldn’t want him any other way….

Jim finished the last bits of food on his plate before getting up and putting the dirty dishes in the sink. Draal gave a hearty burp after finishing his own food. He excused himself then got up and put his own (what he hadn’t eaten) dishes in the sink.
“You know, I really wish you’d let your mother cook more often. Her food is far better than yours...not that I’m saying you’re terrible! Just that...uh...” Draal tapped his fingers together. Jim just smiled and patted his arm

 

“I get it, but not all of us like what my moms….food….is like...” one GREAT thing about Draal, he, for some reason, loves Barbara’s food. Jim will help teach her, the ‘attempt’ at whatever she was cooking got fed to Draal. He loved every bite and always asked for more. Good excuse for Barbara to practice with her son.

Draal watched Jim clean up before asking to assist

“That’s alright, I’ve got this. Why don’t you go get ready”
“I am ready”
“You sharpened you ax?”
“of course”
“And cleaned up your weapons?”
“...i shall go do that” Draal turned around and headed down to the basement. Jim smiled, watching his mate shift his body and horns around to fit through the doorways. He was surprisingly good at that.

It wasn’t long after that the two said goodbye to Barbara and Walt.
“Oh sweetie have fun and be safe” Barbara kissed her son’s cheek.
“I will mom, for both of those things.”
“You know how I worry”
“I know you do. Well even if for some reason I might get into a fight, Draal’s there with me. Aaaand you know he’s literally willing to kill on the spot.”
“Please make sure he doesn’t” Draal walked out of the basement. hearing that he walked over and said with a nod
“I promise I will not take a life this night.”
“and no starting fights?”
“...I will not start them. But I will defend Jim’s honor.”

“Well close enough. Alright boys have fun, don’t stay out to late” Barbara kissed both their cheeks as they left. Tonight was going to be a fun night. Somehow Noten managed to convince the ‘fair Claire’s’ Family to let him throw a party. He promised he’d keep it from going all out explosive and no cops will be called AND nothing will be broken. Now THAT was a hard promise to keep. Luckily he always knew how to clean up after everything. So they gave him the benefit of the doubt….

Earlier that evening when Jim was cooking, his phone rang and he answered to a ‘cheery, trying to convince you cause he wants something’ Noten.
“Heeeyyy! How’s my favorite omega doin?”
“Alright, making dinner”
“heyyy soooo I had something to ask ya”
“what? Is it ‘protection’ from some shady trolls who you made some underhanded deal with?”
“aye! I don’t do nothin under the table no more! Too risky. Besides I knew you would say no anyways.
No, I’ve come to ask my dear dear omega friend to come on over to this little shindig I’m havin. You would be our celebrity guest! The true V.I.P! You would REALLY be a big deal!”

“Thanks but no thanks.”
“Awww come on! You know you wana have fun! Parties started and havin the trollhunta will make this into a legend for the ages! Or at least until I throw another one”
“I’m good thanks, last time I came to one, every drunk alpha hit on me, then Draal hit on them and almost beat them all to death.”
“Big lovin sweet heart you got, drives me to tears. Pleeaaassseee!”
“How did anyone even give you permission?”
“I pulled a few strings, cried a bit, and did a sweet plead”
“….I’m not saying yes, but who’s going to be there?”
“Everyone! Well the important people...I doubt Vendel will show up, old guys not the party type. Besides, don’t cha wana see Arrrg get drunk and headbutt people?”

Jim smiled, when Arrrg was drunk he got VERY rowdy ‘playful’. It was a sight to see. He was a gentle giant, with a frat boy in his head at times.

“That is a nice thing to see...”
“Toby is gonna be here! Wana watch him get drunk and cry?”
Toby was the type to just let everything out and need a shoulder to cry on.
“Maybe...”
“Claire and her friends will be here”
Claire was the type to rarely get drunk, when she did, she was the type to laugh at everything.
“I thought she would, like she would leave you alone.”
“Those two litte lovers will be here”
“Really? They agreed?”
“Yep!”
Steve and Eli rarely went to parties. Eli never cared about them, meanwhile Steve loved them. They made a deal of coming to this one, since they knew there friends would all be there. Steve was funny when he was drunk, he would always take any dare. One time Eli spilled something on his jacket and he had to take it off. He threw it on a couch and when drunk Steve came over, he thought there were two boyfriends. He cried and said he was NOT the type to cheat. He cried and promised it wasn’t his fault. He was loyal like that. Someone recorded it and showed everyone else. It was a great time. Eli was never drunk, maybe a bit buzzed but that was about it.

He always made sure to try and be one of the ‘responsible’ types.
“What about Blinky?”
“You know he would come anyways. You know he wouldn’t leave Arrrg alone at any party.”
Blinky was never the one to drink. He would enjoy partying, but he never cared much for REAL partying. He always rounded everyone up and kept them from getting into too much trouble, especially, and mostly, Arrrg. Arrrg would drunkenly walk over and hit on Blinky.
“Were mates already”
“Really?! With me?!”
“YES!”
“oohh….so wana go out?” Blinky would sigh and decide to take him home.

Draal hardly ever got drunk. Not because he didn’t party, no he did at times. Not because he wanted to stay sober, although he always made sure to have some sort of ‘control’ over himself. ‘a warrior must always be aware of their surroundings!’ he would say. When he DID start to get a buzz, his hunger for violence skyrocketed. He and Arrrg looooved to fight. Causing a LOT of damage, mostly to their environment around them.

 

“Alright. You convinced me. I’m only staying for a little bit though, you hear me?”
“Loud and clear. Okay, no need to bring anything except that fun attitude!”

 

………………………………….

The house was blasting with music and flashing multi colored lights. Jim didn’t even need to knock on the door, as soon as he walked onto the porch Noten opened up the door
“Heyyy! There he is! Alright hurry up and get inside! Oh and uh...you got a pen? Nah who cares! I can find one. Anyways I got some people I need you to meet reaaaaaal quick. Sign a few things, take a few photos and there we go!”
“Suddenly I have to do work?”
“i did say you were the celebrity!”
“So now everyone wants to meet me?”
“nooo! Not everyone! Just a few...out of towners. That’s alllll!” Jim rolled his eyes and headed inside. His ears had already started to ring as music blasted an attack onto his eardrums. Noten told Jim to follow him. Draal went off by himself and had somehow already gotten into a fight.
“Here he is! Like I promised!” Noten said as a group of angry looking trolls looked the two up and down.
“Good. You kept you promise, we’ll keep ours.” Jim raised an eyebrow and looked at Noten. He just smiled a worried expression in reply. So Jim had started to give his autograph out (surprisingly he actually had to develop one. After becoming well known, many people wanted to meet him. Get hugs, signatures, pictures, you name it.) take some photos and the like. A half hour went by until he finally finished up. The once angry looking trolls seemed pleased and then hastily left the party.

 

“Okay, tell me what happened.”
“whaaat? Can’t a changeling just promise a few people to get his best friend the trollhunter to do a quick meet and greet?” Jim didn’t buy It. That was clear on his face.
“...okay okay, stop lookin at me like that. I may or may not have...agreed on something that I didn’t realize until much later that...well….i couldn’t exactly...’make a quota’. So before I lost my head, I promised I could get them to meet cha! At first, they didn’t believe me! So I invited them over-to the party! Yep! I totally threw this just for fun and not a total cover up! So they waited...and uh….well thankfully you came over before anything nasty happened!. You really are such a sweet heart”

“I thought you said you quit doing shady business!? I AM the trollhunter! I make sure stuff like that DOESN’T EXIST. I’M LITERALLY THE TROLL POLICE!”
“Yeah, but your me friend! Aaaannnnnddd you love me! Aaaaannnnd..uh….and you wouldn’t want anythin happinin to me! Besides I promise, after this whole…..well anyways, I swear on me mothers grave that I won’t do ANYTHIN like this again. Trust me, I don’t plan on it. You were LITERALLY my only way out. Phew! Am I the luckiest changeling or what?”

“yeah. Lucky. I need a drink.”
“You’ve earned it!”

Noten jumped up on Jim’s shoulders and yelled out loud to the crowd
“TROLLHUNTAS HERE! TIME TO REALLY. CRANK. THIS. UP!”
everyone roared in agreement.
so the party went on and crazy stuff happened. (just imagine, sorry but I am still super pissed and upset)

 

…………………
Jim opened his eyes, the sunlight was harsh and he felt like he was almost blind. His head felt like Gunmar had split it in half with his sword. Jim opened his eyes more, trying to sit up and looking around. After a few minutes of just trying to get his head to wake up fully, he realized he was still in Claire’s house, laying on her couch. He noticed the house was….spotless.
“There’s me trollhunta!” Noten said in a friendly greeting
“wh...a..”
“Take it easy, here, drink this water, its also got some aspirin.” Jim took it and practically chugged it.
“what...time is it?”
“1:30pm.”
“WHAT?!”
“You had fun last night”
“Okay...what happened? I don’t remember anything...i blinked once and suddenly I’m laying on the couch”
“Well...uh….quick question, you REALLY don’t remember ANYTHIN?”
“nothing...” Noten make a ‘phew’ face. Jim started to scowl
“What happened….why do you look like that.?”
“nothin….well….long story short. Shit got real, you had to step in, big fight, lots more drinking, you started to eat the house, then...might have made love to Draal in Claire’s room. Man you were SHITFACED! I think you drank the strong stuff. Anyways we all had fun! Claire’s bed is pretty much ruined….geez you two are rough and tumble!. How the hell you survive anythin is beyond me. Anyways. Oh and Arrrg chugged two bathtubs of glug in one go! He did it like he was takin shots!”

“okay...go back….”
“to what?”
“the fight for one thing!”
“ohh….well some trolls were getting rowdy. Two alphas saw the same omega, got horny and jealous, and drinking and arguing over getting laid don’t mix well. So a trollhunta broke them up, then Draal broke them. Mostly cause you got a TERRIBLE blow to the head. you’re fine though! don’t worry, we checked you to make sure all the bolts in ya brains still were in the right place, they were.”
“okay...eating the house?”
“yeah by then you were laughing and really just going with the flow. We ran out of snacks and before we replaced them, you started to just munch on the walls, chairs, pillows, hell even the dam ceiling fan! Now THAT was an awesome sight!. We had to get you away before you ate everything else.”
“okay. Now….the last part..”
“well, we didn’t want you eatin the house like a dam termite. You were drunk and crying cause...how did it go again…..OH YEAH! So, you kept hitting on Daal, asking if he had a mate. He said yes. You cried and yelled at him cause you felt like he was stringing you along. Draal said he was dating you, Jim. Then you got mad cause he was dating someone who ‘stole yer name’. So more arguing. Draal just kinda left and then got into some fight, I don’t know, I missed it.

 

Well he was blood thirsty, you were horny. Put two and two together, and you both had a nice calm night~. We hardly got you two into Claire’s room! I was tempted to just let you both fuck on the floor. But I knew you would make too much of a ‘mess.’ and shit was I right! The sheets were nearly soaked!. Big guy really is big all around. So It was...what, 5am when I started to do me cleanin. Of course I had to move you both, Draal I got out of the house, he actually forgot you! I was tempted to call him but I needed to get cleanin. So with a little help, I moved ya down here after I finished up in the living room. And that was that.”

“Okay...what about Claire? Oh god….i...i don’t remember anything….”

“oh she was...well point is she wasn’t too ‘happy’ about her room. So shes out shopping for new sheets, rug, and a mattress. Those things were stained and torn up! I’m also surprised the dam bed legs managed to stay unbroken.”
“yeah..his spikes are nasty. We figure out how to work around them at home...oh Claire..i need to say sorry”
“Already did! You mumbled it in your sleep. Shes still pretty mad though. Parents are out with the baby doin somethin, I dunno, well I decided I owned it to ya to look after ya until you woke up. And here we are! Now get out”
“Gee thanks for looking after me. Ugh...i feel like I died...”
“yeah that’ll happnen to ya. You sure had a good time last night! Truly were the life of the party! Even out played Arrrg! You might also wana shower the second you get home. don’t exactly smell like a daisy.”
“UGH. I smell like Draals-...anyways...Well...i did something fun I guess….” Jim tried to stand up, he was wobbly and fell back down. Noten rolled his eyes and help him up. Jim managed to call and get a ride home from his mom. She didn’t chew him out, seeing his condition. She just told him how worried she was and is happy he’s okay. Even if he didn’t feel like it. Once he got home he showered and ate something, brushed his teeth and kept chugging water throughout the day (tip. Alcohol causes hangovers and cotton mouth because it dehydrates you. Drink up a shit ton of water and you’ll be gtg. Well mostly) Draal and Jim cuddled and quietly relaxed the rest of the day. Well, that’s yet another ‘fun’ day in the life of Jim the hybrid omega trollhunter.