Chapter 1: The Crybaby
"You just can't leave me alone, huh, Deku?"
*Author did some minor edits/updates because they realized they didn't change a few things they wanted to fix before posting*
Apirl 4, 2022
Izuku stood frozen in shock. He forced his limbs to lock in place and dared himself to not breathe should he accidentally alert the other to his presence.
His mind couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing, couldn’t believe it to be true.
When he had first walked into the agency locker rooms, it was with a pounding headache and sore, bruised muscles. He was covered in dirt, sweat and grime, his hero costume torn in multiple places. His bleeding lip had finally stopped, but the cut above his left eye was still leaking, albeit at a sluggish pace now. It had been a long day and definitely not one of his favorites. The villain he and Iida had finally managed to apprehend had been extremely difficult. Her Quirk allowed her to reverse time in rapid intervals, making it almost impossible for Izuku and Iida to keep up with her. It had been even more frustrating when said villain managed to evade every attack they sent her way while also managing to deliver quick and painful attacks of her own.
What made this villain the most challenging, however, was not just her mastery over her Quirk or her advanced skills with a blade. No, this villain was smart. She used her Quirk perfectly to her advantage, employing dramatic tactics that left Izuku grasping air while she sliced through his costume and cut into his skin. She would then employ more subtle tactics, altering time to make certain events seem much slower or faster than they actually were. She had especially enjoyed using this tactic against Iida who had not appreciated the attention one bit.
It had easily been one of the most difficult fights Izuku had had in a while and he assumed the same was for Iida. It had gone on for nearly a whole day resulting in an increased amount of damages, injured civilians (thankfully, only minor bruising and cuts), and a seemingly endless chase across the entire city. Izuku made a mental note to purchase and send a month’s worth of juice pouches and a cat patterned sleeping bag to Aizawa Sensei as thanks for forcing him to undergo such insane training. There was no way he would have been able to keep up with that villain for so long (and without puking even once) if it hadn’t been for his former teacher’s sadistic methods of teaching.
By the time they had finally defeated the villain, it was almost two in the morning and Izuku was sure his limbs were going to fall off. Iida had shared the sentiment and nearly collapsed on the spot, his legs shaking in pain from overuse of his Quirk. Izuku’s arms and legs were not much better. One for All had only been able to help him so much, considering that most of his time had been spent chasing the villain and then saving civilians or Iida at the last second. The villain had hardly given him any time to recover, constantly moving and altering time to her will.
Needless to say, Izuku’s only interest (after giving a brief mission summary alongside Iida to their superiors) was to take a quick shower, clean up and then collapse in bed once he made it back to his apartment without passing out along the way. Somehow.
He had not expected to witness any of ... this. It just it didn’t feel real. It couldn’t be real.
Across the locker room, tucked into the small corner of the wall separating the changing room and the showers, sat the Bakugou Katsuki with his knees drawn up to his chest and his head tucked in his arms. If Izuku hadn’t heard him, he probably would never had seen him to begin with. But he could. He could see and hear everything.
Please, don’t be real.
His gut twisted painfully as Katsuki’s broken sobs echoed against the concrete walls. His entire body shook with each desperate wail that escaped him. It sounded as though he was in complete and utter agony, painfully vulnerable and without any remote sign of stopping.
Another thing that stunned him was Katsuki’s lack of scent. He should have been able to pick up on the smell of an extremely distressed Omega before he had even entered the room. Hell, anyone should have been able to pick up a scent that strong and sour.
Izuku was aware that Katsuki used strong suppressants and scent blockers. Everyone did at the agency, for professional and personal reasons. But nothing was capable of masking someone’s scent that well. Nothing legal, of course.
Something was terribly, terribly wrong.
Izuku so desperately wanted to reach out to him, to ask him what was wrong. But he held himself back. Katsuki wouldn’t want that. He didn’t want help from anyone. He had made that abundantly clear.
During their third and final year at U.A., Katsuki had actually been … pleasant. He was still the same old competitive, explosion detonating Bakugou from before. But he had “mellowed” out in a way. He had been able to get along just fine, if not perfectly with him. They hadn’t become friends, but they weren’t enemies anymore. Hell, Katsuki had even smiled at him once! And not his typical trademark “I’m about to strangle you with your own intestines, you pathetic piece of shit” smile. A for real, genuine smile!
Izuku couldn’t recall a single time Katsuki had smiled in the past four years.
Something had changed in Katsuki. Maybe it was the increasingly competitive and stressful life that came with being a young adult Pro Hero. Maybe he hadn’t been able to handle or control the certain aspects of himself that he wanted to. Maybe his pride in his abilities had diminished, felt miniscule and irrelevant in his mind in comparison to everyone else.
Whatever it was, it had destroyed nearly every bit of growth Katsuki had managed to create. He was hardly seen outside the agency or on patrol. He was hyper aggressive and territorial without actually full on assaulting his coworkers. He was constantly on edge, screaming at the smallest of slights and the most mundane of inconveniences. He took offers of help as personal attacks on his abilities and constantly seethed over the criticisms of his work ethic.
When he was on duty as Ground Zero, he was able to maintain a professional, if not hostile manner. He was able to get his missions done successfully and was able to work with others when forced to do so. He was relentless in seeing everything through from rescuing every possible civilian to the mountains of paperwork and reports he had to fill out every night. He was meticulous with his strategizing and was willing to take on any mission, no matter how insanely dangerous or mundane.
These were probably the only reasons he hadn’t been just straight up fired by their agency at this point.
Izuku had heard rumors as well. That Katsuki had stopped eating as much, that he appeared to be sleeping less. He was constantly fidgeting when he was forced to wait or sit still at his desk. He stopped going out after work to hang out with their fellow heroes. He had taken to covering his neck a lot lately, adding a higher collar to his costume. He had started wearing thicker and longer sleeved clothing despite the changes in the weather.
Then there was the the most troubling development: Katsuki had stopped speaking to Kirishima, virtually cutting him out of his life altogether.
Izuku had been beyond shocked to discover just how horribly true that rumor actually was. He had noticed almost two years back that Kirishima had been especially distraught for months on end. When he had accidentally walked in on him silently weeping in his office, Izuku couldn’t bring himself to walk away. He had done his best to comfort the other Alpha, listening to and even holding him when he became particularly distraught. He listened as Kirishima told him how worried he had become over Katsuki, how he had sought him out countless times and done everything he could possibly think of to make his friend happy once again.
At first, Kirishima swore that Katsuki was getting better. He seemed to be getting more sleep and would even hang out for long hours after work and on their days off. He had seemed lighter almost, able to make jokes and banter with him like back in high school. Looking back, however, Kirishima did admit that there were times where things had felt … off. He would glance over to Katsuki when the other didn’t seem to notice him and would be blown away by just how dead his best friend seemed. His eyes were noticeably duller, his skin paler, his facial features completely blank and devoid of any emotion. He would appear to be staring off into nothing as though separated from the moment and his body entirely.
And then he would snap back to his “normal” self as though nothing had happened.
He had tried so hard to get Katsuki to talk to him and would do his best to make sure the other knew he was there for him whenever he might need him. When Katsuki began to talk even less, he gently suggested that perhaps he should seek out someone or something else. He stopped mentioning therapy altogether after Katsuki threw him out of his apartment and refused to speak to him for several days.
Then the day came when Katsuki refused to let them mark each other as pack anymore. Refused to let him anywhere near his apartment again. Refused to let him anywhere close to him altogether. Then there was the night that Katsuki refused to even acknowledge his presence altogether, refused to react or to respond to anything Kirishima said or did. And without a single explanation for any of it no matter how much Kirishima had cried and begged for Katsuki to explain what he had done wrong, what he could possibly do to fix things.
Katsuki never told him why.
Kirishima still remained friendly and cordial with Katsuki whenever they happened to run into each other, but he was always met with a thick wall of silence. Izuku didn’t have to look at his face or seek out his scent to know that the other was still devastated despite the two years that had passed since that fateful night.
When Izuku had run into that wall again, he didn’t even try to fight it. It hurt, yes. God, it hurt. He had hoped beyond all belief that he would never have to encounter that wall again. But things were different now. His world was bigger than his old childhood friend. He had others he could rely on. Others who never repeatedly constructed impenetrable walls against him or made him feel so awful inside with every single interaction. He didn’t want to give up on Katsuki, not after everything they had been through. But ...
Watching Kirishima fall apart on the grey blue carpet of his office … it scared and hurt Izuku to even think about trying again. He just couldn’t do it anymore. He still cared for Katsuki, God knows he did. But he couldn’t experience what Kirishima was going through all over again. He didn’t think he would be able to make it the second time around.
So what he was supposed to do now?
Several things, he knew, were for certain.
One, Katsuki was so lost in his grief that he hadn’t heard Izuku when he first walked into the locker room.
Two, Katsuki believed he was alone. He had most likely chosen this specific place at this specific time to let his emotions out. No one was typically here at the agency this late, let alone the locker rooms.
Three, if Katsuki caught onto the fact he wasn’t as alone as he thought he was, he would definitely lash out. Violently. He had never been comfortable with showing his vulnerability before and his behavior the past four years made Izuku suspect it would only be worse.
Four, Katsuki’s arms and neck were bare for once, seeing as he had elected to wear a tanktop. Izuku took in the dark, ugly bruises that littered his arms. He could make out the distinct shapes of a violent hand grip. When Katsuki made a wet hiccup, his head jostled enough that Izuku could see that the bruises were extended to his collarbone and shoulders.
Five … five made Izuku’s insides run cold and his throat fill with bile. Katsuki’s neck … it looked as though a wild animal had mauled him. He could make out distinct scarred tissue in the shape of sharp teeth. His neck glands looked as though they had been nearly ripped out.
Izuku’s terror quickly turned to pure Alpha rage at the sight of a newly added claiming mark. It was dark red and ugly. He could tell that it was fresh, that it clearly had been bleeding out for most of the day. He knew that it would scar just like the others.
He bit down harshly on his lip and willed his scent to die down before Katsuki would notice. He fought against the urge to jump to conclusions, to add up all the clues in his mind before hearing the full story. If Katsuki was even willing to tell him the whole story.
All the same, it wouldn’t do well if the first thing Katsuki noticed was the scent of an enraged Alpha. Izuku prided himself on his control over his second gender, using it to his advantage in battle while also employing his instincts in order to comfort friends and civilians alike.
Katsuki and him had hardly spoken to each other outside of the rare times when they would get assigned a mission together. He was going to have to tread extremely carefully here. If Katsuki was being harmed by someone, he wouldn’t want anyone to know about it. He would get defensive, deny that anything of that nature was even taking place. If he was feeling this broken, Izuku suspected that his pride was one of the few things that would remain intact.
It also meant that Katsuki would be far more volatile than any time Izuku had ever seen him. There was no way there wouldn’t be an altercation of some sorts, no matter how gently or quickly he handled the situation. But he couldn’t just leave Katsuki like this. He so desperately needed help and while he knew that he was the less than ideal person to be offering this, Izuku resolved himself to take on the brunt of Katsuki’s anger and distrust.
With that, Izuku begin to ever so slowly send out small waves of comforting pheromones in the locker room. Nothing too noticeable at first unless someone was looking for it, of course. Every ten seconds, he would instinctually strengthen his pheromones and spread them farther out, careful to insure that they wouldn’t hit Katsuki just yet.
Izuku waited five minutes and when Katsuki still hadn’t reacted, he took a deep breath and pressed harder. Almost immediately a harsh gasp rang out and Izuku couldn’t help but wince at the startled and terrified expression the other was now sporting.
For a tense moment, they simply stared at each other. Red, widened eyes met dark and determined greens. Neither of them said a word. The silence was practically unbearable to Izuku, but he stood his ground as he relaxed his posture. He held his hands out where Katsuki could see them, taking note of how wildly the other’s eyes followed the miniscule movement. Izuku paused for a moment before tilting his head so that his neck was perfectly exposed: a clear and vulnerable sign of complete submission.
Taking a deep breath, Izuku pushed his pheromones out to Katsuki all the way and watched as he violently recoiled against the comforting scents. He was practically scrambling to get away from it, even going so far as to move onto his hands and knees before sprinting further into the locker room. Izuku blinked in surprise before moving to follow after him.
“Katsuki! Wait!” Izuku cried out.
He definitely hadn’t been expecting that kind of reaction. Katsuki running? From him?
The image of bruised skin and a brutal claiming mark flashed into his mind. Izuku stifled the growl that escaped him before it became too loud and pumped more strength into his legs despite the sting. The locker room wasn’t exactly large by any means and the only clear path Katsuki had was either back towards him or to the showers. Izuku made a mental note to keep an eye on the exit behind him, just in case.
Mindful of the slick floors Izuku swung around the wall that led into the long hallway en route to the showers, using the momentum to gain even further distance. A shock of blonde hair disappeared quickly around the next corner, causing Izuku to muster up 15% of One for All. If Katsuki managed to make it to the pool exit at the end of the shower room, there was little chance of him being able to catch him before he hid and then disappeared altogether.
His heels audibly skidded with a sharp squeal as he rounded the corner and entered the shower room. Immediately his eyes narrowed, the room suspiciously empty. He eyed the sign at the end of room that signaled the entrance to the pool area and slowly walked towards it. Something didn’t feel right. Katsuki had been moving quickly, but he wouldn’t have been fast enough to keep up with Izuku even if he had used One for All at a meager 5%. Not at that short a distance.
No, Izuku had a distinct suspicion as to where exactly Katsuki was.
“Katsuki, I’m not going to hurt you,” he said aloud, careful to keep his voice as nonthreatening as possible. “I didn’t mean to scare you like that. Promise. I just wanna talk. Is that okay?”
Even though he suspected it would be useless, Izuku sniffed out for the other’s scent and was unsurprised to find none. The soft thud of his boots echoed eerily as he walked across the shower room tiles, almost ominous sounding to even his own ears. He came to a quiet stop once he reached the center of the room.
“I know I’m the last person you want to see right now,” Izuku tried again. “And I know that you don’t like people seeing you … I get that this is probably a lot right now. But I’m worried about you and I just wanna make sure you’re okay.”
He let out a long sigh when no response came.
“You probably don’t want to hear me say that, either, huh?” he asked.
Again, silence. Izuku worried his lip before an idea suddenly popped into his mind. He couldn’t detect Katsuki’s scent, but he definitely could smell his own. And he had doused the area near Katsuki the strongest back in the locker room. Maybe …
Taking a deep breath, Izuku close his eyes and sniffed at the air around him before opening them again. He turned his head to a series of stalls to his back right, careful to avoid tipping Katsuki off that he now knew where he was hidden. Working fast, Izuku pumped One for All at nearly 50% capacity, unwilling to risk losing Katsuki again. He moved so quickly that he practically smacked into the stall door, but managed to pry it open despite the lock.
A soft whimper shattered his focus.
Izuku could only stare in paralyzed shock as Katsuki clung to the side of the shower stall, his fingers clinging to the top of it with a white knuckling grip. At the realization he had been caught, he all but crumpled to the tile floor, letting go and sliding against the wall. This close up, Izuku was able to take in everything in greater detail. Katsuki’s tears were streaming down his face again, desperate whines and loud whimpers falling from his mouth uncontrollably. His eyes appeared sunken in, his skin sickeningly pale making the bruises and markings even darker in comparison. He was shaking so violently his teeth would rattle against each other and his arms wounds tight around him as he began to rock himself back and forth. He felt himself almost vomit at the sight of pure fear in Katsuki’s eyes.
He hardly had a moment to contemplate who that fear was directed towards before Katsuki stunned him once again.
“Alpha. Alpha. I’m sorry, Alpha.”
No, no, no, no-
“I’m sorry I ran, Alpha. I won’t do it again. I promise, Alpha.”
Katsuki’s voice was desperate, almost erratic. Begging, even.
Stop it. Stop it. Just stop-
“I’ll be good, Alpha. I’ll be a good Omega. I’m taking care of your pup, just like you told me to. I’m being good!”
What the fuck, no, no, no, no, NO!!!
“I’m being good, Alpha, I promise! I promise I’ll be your good Omega! I won’t put your pup in danger! YOU’RE RIGHT! I’M BEING SELFISH!!!”
His voice was rising even higher now, borderline hysterical.
This couldn’t be happening. There was just no way something like this would ever happen-
"I WON'T DO IT AGAIN, ALPHA!!! I WON'T FIGHT YOU ANYMORE!!! I'M DONE BEING A HERO!!! I QUIT TODAY JUST LIKE YOU WANTED-"
Izuku’s hand flew to his mouth, but the damage had already been done. Katsuki’s expression had gone completely blank, not even attempting to fight off his accidental Alpha Order. He had fallen silent and his rocking had ceased altogether.
If there was ever a moment Izuku truly hated himself, it was now. The sight of Katsuki tilting his neck in submission and staring back at him, his eyes glazed over and virtually dead to the world made Izuku’s stomach roll dangerously.
“What happened, Kacchan?” he sobbed. “What happened?”
Update: saw some grammar mistakes and such. I am that kind of author, sorry! D:
The only thing I really majorly edited were some details at the end where Katsuki was hysterical after Izuku found him again. Sometimes I post things at ass o'clock at night and don't do as great a job of rewriting/editing things and I forgot to tweak a few small things before posting this fic.
Oh, look another fic I've been writing to avoid writing the newest chapter on my other longer running fic. When will the madness ever end?
For real, though, I've been benching this fic for quite a while. I almost considered just scrapping it altogether. Buuuuuuuttttt ... there's still a lot of ideas I would like to explore here and who knows? Maybe I'll grow to love it just as much as my other fics. We'll see.
This is going to be more of an angst ride than anything, but I promise to sprinkle in fluff here and there. Let me know if this is something you guys would be interested in me writing any further.
Chapter 2: The Sinner
"Honestly, I think there's something fucking wrong with you."
A slow look from four years back and to the present from Katsuki's perspective, part numero uno.
P.S. Be prepared for depression, PTSD episodes, self-destructive behavior, OCs that won't really appear again outside the chapters they're introduced (that's a promise) and loads of smut in this chapter and the next.
P.S.S. To everyone who is already theorizing about who the mysterious Alpha is .... have fun >:3
October 29, 2017
Katsuki barely took in anything the nurse was telling him. Probably something about how visiting hours were going to be over soon or maybe another attempt to get him to agree to a check up. It didn’t matter. He couldn’t see anything other than the young body before him.
He had to be quite the sight. His mask gone after having been torn and pulled into tiny pieces. His costume was ripped and barely hanging onto his body. His arms were laced with cuts that had stopped bleeding hours ago, a deep gash stitched together on his torso. A wad of gauze was bandanged to his right cheek and his hands were aching painfully from the overuse of his Quirk. Someone had wrapped a blanket around him at some point, too, but Katsuki couldn’t even begin to conjure a face or a name of the one who did.
“Mr. Ground Zero, I’m really sorry,” the nurse’s voice finally started to fade back in. Her voice was irritatingly sympathetic. “It’s already two and a half hours past visiting hours and unless you’re a family member of the patient, the hospital cannot allow you to stay any longer. I’m sorry, but I have to ask you to leave now.”
Katsuki nodded his head minutely to let her know he understood. His voice sounded dead and gravely even to his own ears.
“Just five more minutes,” he whispered. “Just five more.”
“Okay, five more minutes,” she agreed with a soft sigh. “But I really can’t do any longer than that.”
Again he nodded. Once he heard the audible click of the door, he focused back in on the sound of the steady heart monitor and the near silent breaths forced from the breathing tube. He stared at black locks and pale skin, watching the unnatural rise and fall of a chest that belonged to lungs that forgotten what their job was. His fingers twitched violently as he took in the burns that weren’t wrapped in bandages or thick layers of gauze. The burns that were actually minor in comparison to those that were obscured. Finally, his eyes began to wander back down to where a set of legs should definitely be. Or had been there, but were now quite significantly missing.
He took a deep breath, releasing it with a violent shudder before cradling his face in his hands once again.
“You fucked up, Bakugou Katsuki,” he whispered into the still hospital room. “You fucked up and you should rot for it.”
Nov 23, 2017
Katsuki was in a bar at who knows what fucking time. He didn’t know the name of the place was and he really didn’t care trying to figure it out. He had heard somewhere before, maybe from some older heroes or just adults in general, that alcohol was the go to in situations like this. He wasn’t quite exactly seeing the appeal, but then again he was drinking the most basic of beers. He hadn’t even worked up to a buzz yet. If he really wanted to get trashed tonight (he was sorely working his way up to it), he would get up from his seat and bother the bartender for something significantly harder.
As it was, Katsuki couldn’t find the will to get up just yet. He couldn’t quite feel his limbs and a strange sort of numbness had overtaken him ever since he had left the hospital. A toddler’s desperate wailing suddenly began to ring in his ears, replacing the shitty top charting music that was blaring from the bar’s speakers. He felt his limbs become dead weight, locking into place as his breath started to come out erratically.
He waded through the bodies, searching everywhere. There were so many of them, but he had to find the kid. They were here, he knew they were! They needed his help, damnit! Who knows what would happen if he didn’t get there in time. Katsuki bit back the sting of his tears from the smoke, coughing wetly at the burn in his lungs before pushing himself further inside. He winced at the squelch of a body beneath his boots, the crack of a bone as he climbed over and then inside. The kid was inside, he knew he was! He just had to keep pushing, pulling an arm here and breaking a leg there. He couldn’t do anything for these people now, but he could help this kid. He had to! He was a hero for fuck’s sake!
The crying was getting louder now and Katsuki felt hope begin to stir within his chest. He pushed another body aside, ignoring the wet splat it made from the force he used. There! There! Katsuki could see them now! Right through the wrongly bent angle of a mangled arm. They were waiting for him! He just had to reach out a little more. Just a little bit more-
“Hey, are you, uh, here with anyone?” a nervous voice asked.
Katsuki nearly toppled out of his booth in shock before leveling as harsh a glare he could towards whoever had just spoken to him. He couldn’t help sneering at the Alpha that had just dared to hit on him. He eyed the man down, taking in his pathetically plain looks from his brown eyes to his equally dull, dark brown hair. The only thing questionably interesting about his appearance was the slight speck of freckles covered his cheeks and forehead. Even his dorky ass smile scraped him in an irritating way. He was tempted to send the idiot packing.
However … he couldn’t deny that he was in desperate need of a distraction. Taking another long sip from his beer, Katsuki angled himself to face his his “suitor” fully.
“Need to get your dick wet, Alpha, or are you actually here for conversation?” he snarked. He laughed out loud when the other’s face immediately flushed a deep crimson.
“I, uh, both?” the plain Alpha floundered. “I mean, nothing you’re not comfortable with! If I’m bothering you, I’ll go away! I’m probably bothering you, aren’t I? I’ll just go away and leave you alone now-”
“Shut up, holy shit,” Katsuki chuckled, gripping the other’s arm a bit to prevent him from going anywhere just yet. “Does any of this actually get you laid?”
“Does any of what?” the Alpha asked, blinking almost comically back at him. Katsuki took another swig and barked out another laugh.
“You! Do people actually want to fuck you?” he asked.
“I mean, uh, sometimes?” the Alpha replied. “Everyone has their personal tastes and all, I guess. And it’s not like I just expect you to sleep with me or anything. I’m perfectly fine with you telling me to … fuck off.”
Katsuki raised a brow at how quietly the other cursed. Like he was ashamed to do it or something. The plain Alpha flushed even darker at his stare and even went so far at to rub the back of his neck nervously.
Holy fucking shit. This was going to be so much fun!
Without giving him a warning, Katsuki pulled onto the Alpha with as much force as he could muster. With a startled yelp the Alpha followed, landing perfectly in between Katsuki’s open thighs and his face practically a breath away from his lips. The plain Alpha blinked down at him in surprise, his right arm bracing himself up against the wall of the booth to keep himself from landing fully on top of him. Katsuki sneered up at the other before moving an arm around the Alpha’s waist and pulling him flush against him until there was no more space in between them. He openly delighted in the unflattering grunt his “suitor” emitted and made it known through his scent just how pleased he was with himself.
“What’s your name, Alpha?” he asked.
“Han-Hansuke” the plain Alpha breathily answered.
“Well, Hansuke,” Katsuki purred. “Do you wanna fuck me?”
“If that’s what you want” Hansuke answered.
He stared back at Hansuke, relishing a bit at the small sweat the nervous Alpha was starting to build up. It made him feel powerful in a way. In control.
But it also made him really fucking impatient.
“Say you want to fuck me or go home and make love to your hand” he ordered, growling darkly.
“I want to f-fuck you” Hansuke obeyed.
Katsuki laughed and pulled down the plain Alpha for a rough kiss. It was more teeth than anything, but he was pleased to see just how breathless Hansuke looked when he did eventually break the kiss.
“You better not disappoint, Hansuke,” he growled.
“I hope I don’t,” Hansuke laughed. “You’d probably kill me if I did.”
“You’re not wrong” Katsuki threatened.
Despite his plain looks, Katsuki had to begrudgingly admit that the Hansuke wasn’t a bad lay. Not that he exactly he had a lot of reference to compare notes with, but with how good the plain Alpha was making him feel he was pretty confident his judgement was sound. He was more surprised than anything to find himself enjoying the feel of the other’s cock inside him, each thrust physically dragging him up and down his mattress. He wasn’t even ashamed of how loud his moans were becoming or of the desperate whines that escaped him when Hansuke sucked at his neck glands in time with a particularly hard thrust that had him seeing stars. He could hear himself pathetically begging the Alpha behind him, sobbing and wetly demanding that he grip him tighter, fuck him harder. It almost felt like the air was being knocked out of his lungs when Hansuke started pounding more forcefully into him, borderline brutal even.
He was practically clinging onto his sheets for dear life when his arms suddenly gave out from underneath him. Hansuke’s firm hold on his hips was the only thing keeping his entire lower half from following suit, a fact that Katsuki became even more aware of when Hansuke wound an arm around his waist and started pulling him back onto his cock with impossibly even deeper thrusts. Katsuki couldn’t help but feel so blessed in that moment at the fact that Hansuke was definitely one of those Alphas that so genuinely lived to please their partners. Shit, Katsuki was willing to bet he probably got off harder when his partners were more fucked out than he was.
A part of him wanted to be embarrassed at the position he was losing his virginity in. It had been Katsuki’s idea, after all, to use this one in particular. Whether from nervousness or just excited anticipation, he knew he wouldn’t have been comfortable with a stranger witnessing his first reactions to sex. Or anyone for that matter. It hadn’t been his plan to lose it tonight, but like fuck he was going to let just anyone see him like this. Hansuke hardly gave him a time to be embarrassed by his body’s reactions, always giving him praise, always complimenting him and holding him tighter. Katsuki felt himself blush at the endearments sent his way, almost irritated even. But then Hansuke would pinch his nipple just right, would suck at the tip of his cock just so or brush his tongue so perfectly inside him. After a few rounds of Hansuke eating him out, mouthing at his cock and then teasing him with his fingers, Katsuki had all but snarled at him to get the fuck on with it. The plain Alpha hadn’t seemed to mind his display of roughness and impatience. He almost seemed endeared by it.
Probably because he had managed to make Katsuki scream his name more than a couple times. Whatever. What? Did he want a prize or something?
So while he had chosen to enter the most basic position in all existence (especially for an Omega), Katsuki hadn’t thought much of it besides that. He had ignored the small part of his brain that pointed out how nervous he was at presenting himself this way, the voice of insecurity on whether he was even doing it right to begin with. Hansuke had definitely seemed pleased judging by how he had eagerly ran his cock in between his folds, not quite ready to stop teasing him. Katsuki would forever deny the small warmth that came over him when the plain Alpha bit and sucked at his earlobe, whispering small praises that actually made him slick up even more.
Figures that he would have some sort of praise kink.
When Hansuke had finally, finally entered him, Katsuki let out a long high whine of satisfaction. The plain Alpha had elected to start slow, but he couldn’t bring himself to pretend to complain. He had mentally prepared himself for a harsh, if not somewhat painful first time, but Hansuke’s insistence on teasing his impatience even further came with its own added benefits. Other than the more obvious upside to all of this, it also forced Katsuki to just feel. He was momentarily dazed at just how full he suddenly felt, how Hansuke’s cock lazily rubbed against his insides so good. He felt himself clench sporadically once or twice as the plain Alpha continued his slow place until he was finally balls deep inside him. When Hansuke then elected to just stay still there, Katsuki finally moved his head to look over his shoulder with an Omegan whine. The most obvious and degrading form for him to desperately request his partner to just fucking move already! He didn’t bother to hide his blush at Hansuke’s small laugh, only letting out another longer Omegan whine.
“Ssshh,” Hansuke had gently hushed him when he began to slowly pull back out. Katsuki sobbed at the sudden emptiness, tears beginning to collect on his lashes before Hansuke entered him with another lazy thrust. “I’ve got you, baby. I’ve got you.”
“N-not your baby” Katsuki hiccuped, still looking over his shoulder.
“Hmmmm,” Hansuke hummed. “You think so?”
Katsuki let out a gasp, eyes wide and cheeks flushed darker. Hansuke had thrusted into him balls deep again and was holding him still once more, the hands on his hips keeping him immobilized. Katsuki sobbed wetly, desperately wanting his partner to really take him.
“You really sure about that?” Hansuke teased. He smirked amusedly as Katsuki tried to squirm against his hold. “You sure you’re not my baby?”
“P-please! Please, Alpha!” Katsuki sobbed. How the fuck was Hansuke able to stand not moving? Katsuki was absolutely positive he was going to die if he didn’t start in the next second!
“You like my cock, baby?” Hansuke continued, mercifully pulling back and sliding forward. “You like it when I’m inside you like this?”
“Fuck y-yes!” Katsuki shouted. “Yes, Alpha, yes!”
Holy fucking shit, Hansuke felt fantastic. Who was it that said you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover? As far losing your virginity goes, Katsuki was convinced that he had hit the all time jackpot. He had quickly lost count of how many times Hansuke had made him orgasm, how many times he made him scream and lose his mind under his ministrations. He hadn’t bothered to tell the other this was his first time, but holy shit Hansuke was making him feel like a Goddamn motherfucking princess. Katsuki had used to scoff at the way others around him spoke about sex, at how desperate and ridiculous they seemed about it. After tonight, Katsuki knew for certain he was going to become a full-blown addict.
Katsuki moaned at the thought of a next time. There was no way he was going to let this shitty, plain ass motherfucker disappear when this was over. Hansuke, that dumb fuck, had no idea what he had just signed himself up for-
His entire body jolted and shuddered in surprise. He blinked in stupefaction, his brain rapidly working fast to figure out what exactly had just happened. A pleasant feeling had overtaken his mind and he felt himself gush out another wave of slick, his thighs absolutely beyond drenched now. He stared almost trance-like over his shoulder again at where a visible white hand print was displayed amongst the dark pink of his right butt cheek.
“S-sorry!” Hansuke immediately apologized, coming to a sudden stop. “I should of asked first before doing that!”
Katsuki blinked as he took in the sting and warmth left behind from where Hansuke had abruptly slapped his ass out of nowhere. He could feel his body shaking just the slightest, his breath coming out just a tad bit harsher as he watched the hand print begin to fade and blend back into dark pink.
“That was totally uncool of me!” Hansuke continued. “I’m so sorry, Katsu-”
“Do it again” Katsuki interrupted him, his voice a mere whisper.
“What?” Hansuke asked. “Are-are you sure?”
He turned his head back to stare at his partner, his expression fixed into his trademark smirk. He felt a rush of pure, unadulterated glee crash through him at Hansuke’s surprised blush. He grinned wider and feeling a bit daring, clenched harshly around the cock inside him. He relished in the shocked gasp he wrung out of his partner and felt no embarrassment for the first time as another loud gush of slick escaped him. Fuck, he was making a mess, but if getting spanked really made him feel that good, fuck all if Katsuki wasn’t going to experience that again.
“Do it, Alpha” he smirked. “Do it harder. Make your baby cry.”
For the first time in weeks, Katsuki was able to sleep without a single nightmare.
May 8, 2018
“I just don’t think I’m the right person for you,” Hansuke said. “I really like you, Katsuki. A lot, really. But I just … I’m kinda starting to wonder if maybe this isn’t really working.”
Katsuki snorted in derision reflexively, not even attempting to hold back the roll of his eyes. They were in a coffee shop of all places because of fucking course Hansuke would want to do this in the most cliche of break up places. A wave of harsh embitterment washed over him as his ex (fuck, he had an ex now) nervously continued to stir the spoon in his tea.
“And?” he asked. “That’s all you got to say, Alpha?”
“Come on, Katsuki,” Hansuke sighed. “I’m trying here. I know that this is … shitty and everything. And I’ve been dumped before so I know how horrible it feels. Can you just let me explain myself at least? I don’t want you to think this is your fault or anything like that. I would spend my time for weeks, even months after getting dumped wondering about what was wrong with me. I just … I wanna try to help you with that. Is that okay?”
Jesus sweet fucking Christ! Why did I have to bang the doe-eyed Alpha with the magic cock?
“Fine. I’ll listen, Hansuke” he surrendered, taking a sip from his still scalding hot coffee. He strongly resisted the urge to roll his eyes again at Hansuke’s look of utter relief.
“Thank you, Katsuki!” the plain Alpha smiled.
Stop doing that shit, you asshole Prince Charming! Fuck!
“Where was I? Oh, right!” Hansuke began again. “This was always going to just be a … sex thing.”
Katsuki did roll his eyes at how Hansuke whispered “sex.”
“And that’s perfectly fine!” his ex continued. “It was actually a lot of fun and you’re definitely one of the best partners I’ve ever had! I’m not just saying that, either! You honestly made me a lot happier and I was always so excited to see you. You’re genuinely a really fun and hilarious person to be around.”
“You’re the only one who thinks that” Katsuki interrupted. He did his best to hide his smile inside his coffee when Hansuke let out a loud laugh.
“No, you’re a great person,” Hansuke insisted. His expression suddenly sobered and Katsuki physically felt his chest clench. “It’s just … I don’t think I can give you what you want.”
“And what do you think that is?” Katsuki asked. “You fall in love with me or some shit?”
“Nothing like that,” Hansuke replied, shaking his head. “I think … I think you want me to handle you a lot rougher or something like that. I don’t think you feel confident enough to ask me for what you want and I think that’s because you know I’m not exactly … into that kind of thing.”
At Katsuki’s unimpressed glare, his ex began to flounder.
“N-not that there’s anything wrong with that!” he clambered. “I mean, you didn’t even tell me you were a virgin when we first … you know. So it makes sense that you would still want to try other stuff or explore new things. Which is totally cool and a fun thing to do! The problem is that I kinda already know what I want and … I don’t think you’d like trying it with me, specifically.”
Katsuki let out a long sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. Had he really been that obvious? And how exactly was he supposed to go around asking for something he didn’t know he wanted or even understood?
“Whatever, we’re done and that’s that,” he eventually settled on. He audibly groaned at Hansuke’s downcast expression, rubbing his hand down his face in order to collect himself.
“I’m gonna miss you, okay?” Katsuki told him. “I … I really liked you, too. But life’s life and shit’s shit.”
He tried to not blush under his ex’s daydream gaze, his brown eyes practically sparkling.
Seriously, how in the ever loving fuck did this mushie ass Alpha ever make me slick at the mere sight of him?
When Hansuke had hugged him and wished him well, Katsuki returned it wholeheartedly. He just didn’t have the energy to be a dick after Hansuke had sat with for another hour making him feel significantly better and even managing to draw an actual heart to heart out of him. Him, the explosion monster demon. It still hadn’t prepared him for the way his heart clenched painfully after dropping Hansuke off at his apartment. Nor the pinprick of tears that accompanied him all the way home in the car.
Seriously … how am I gonna find another person like that?
Katsuki was genuinely taken aback by just how much this actually … hurt. He never thought he would be one of those idiots that actually formed an attachment to the person they lost their virginity to. It sounded completely ridiculous and out of character for him to be experiencing any form of loss over a nearly four month-long fuck buddy.
He bit into his pizza and nodded along to Eijirou’s over the top retelling of his patrol with Pikachu earlier that day. Something about a purse snatcher with a confusion Quirk, who used a purple moped as a means of transportation and wouldn’t stop throwing the dumbest and most nonsensical puns at them.
I gotta remember to tell Hansuke about this. He loves hearing stories about Shitty Hair-
Katsuki nearly choked on his pizza, coughing harshly and ignoring his best friend’s worried expression. He pushed off Eijirou’s efforts to give him the Heimlich, delivering a particular strong kick to his shin that had his friend wincing despite the fact he had activated his Quirk in response. After taking a long sip of his water, he motioned for Eijirou to continue on with his story and grabbed another slice.
Really? It’s only been five hours and you’re missing him this much?
Whatever. He’d get over it like he did with every other obstacle that got in his way. He had been able to function just perfectly without sex before, he most definitely could do it once again.
The image of a teenage boy in a hospital gown, his lower legs amputated and a breathing tube down his throat flashed through his mind. A thick wad of bandages covered the left side of his face and shoulder, where the burns were at their worse. The methodical sound of the heart monitor beeping in the background as a toddler clung to the teen’s hand, yelling and begging for their brother to respond to them. The empathetic and teary eyed stares of nurses and the doctor as they tried to console him, a cacophony of voices promising that he was going to be okay. That they would make sure someone took care of him until his older brother woke up.
If his brother woke up.
Katsuki set the pizza down, appetite completely gone. He ignored his best friend’s gentle encouragements to eat just a little more. At least, that’s probably what he was saying. He couldn’t be sure exactly.
He didn’t sleep a single wink that night.
June 17, 2018
Looking for a new partner after Hansuke had been … hard. Katsuki hadn’t been exactly sure how to go about it. He wasn’t an idiot to assume that anyone he met would be as good. Fuck, he had only been slept with one amazing person and now his standards were incredibly fucking high. But there remained that insecure and irritated part of him that wondered if Hansuke had a point. Maybe he did want a very specific thing and maybe he needed a partner who was willing to explore that with him. Whatever “that” might actually be.
Which meant that one night stands weren’t going to be able to satisfy him for long. He had started frequenting bars and clubs a lot more lately, doing his best to entice whoever he could to spend a night with him. That in itself was a thrill. Katsuki had known he was attractive, but he hadn’t spent much time until fairly recently contemplating just how attractive he might actually be. He never had seriously spent a moment to consider just how “sexy” he could be.
He enjoyed it immensely when others would come to him, would do and say whatever they could to garner his approval. Even if he wasn’t interested in whoever was propositioning him, just the fact that they would attempt to seek his favor was flattering to his ego. The ability to reject and even humiliate the other should the person get irritatingly aggressive or flat-out stubborn was just as addicting.
And when he deemed that someone was worthy of his attention, Katsuki was pleased to discover that he had a natural ability to seduce others. He had been initially nervous the first time he had approached a female Omega, unsure as to whether he would come across as an idiot or if she had a preference towards first and/or second genders. When she had responded immediately to his interest, Katsuki’s ego swelled even more.
She had admittedly never been with another Omega herself and was perfectly open to trying it out with him. While there had been a few bumps here and there during their coupling, both had concluded in agreement that the experience had been eye opening and amazingly satisfying. He was beyond thrilled when they became fuck buddies for a short three weeks. While the time had been dramatically short in comparison to Hansuke, Katsuki had felt remarkably more confident in himself.
Is this why people were so interested in dating and sex? If so, Katsuki could most definitely get behind it.
But it didn’t solve everything.
When he and Hansuke were still together, there was a comfortable ease and trust that came to their relationship. If he was experiencing persistent nightmares or he had a rough day on patrol, he only had to send a text and he would be guaranteed an hour or even a whole day of pure and utter bliss. A time where he didn’t have to think, didn’t have to do anything but feel. Hansuke had been so skilled at getting him out of his head and Katsuki greatly missed him for that despite the mushie Alpha’s insistent need to cuddle afterwards every single time.
The problem was finding someone else who could do just as good a job if not more. Someone who could satisfy his baser needs while also simultaneously satisfying his other mystery ones.
Katsuki knew he was acting desperate. Fuck, he felt absolutely pathetic. He hadn’t anticipated just how much he had actually depended on Hansuke to distract him from … everything. The nightmares and shakiness were coming back with a vengeance and Katsuki saw the miniscule ways it affected his work. He would randomly freeze for a second out of nowhere while assisting a civilian, would completely zone out while fighting a villain or doing a mission with his coworkers. There were times where he simply had no recollection whatsoever of what had happened that day and the sudden anxiety from not knowing would incase him within an iron grip. He would stare down at his blank mission report sometimes and be completely unable to recall what had even transpired, relying on carefully extracting the information out of whatever other hero he had been assigned with. More often than not, said heroes were Shitty Hair, Icy Hot or Round Cheeks.
Eijirou was by the far the easiest to get along with and was prone to talking out loud when filling out his report. It was almost annoying just how forgetful Shitty Hair could be at forgetting the details, especially when he would ask him for help. A quick jab at his intelligence or mocking joke about his horrible attention span would always result in Eijirou jokingly attempting to defend himself and point out what he had done right … before admitting what Katsuki had done better than him.
Todoroki was annoyingly difficult, but if he pressed and annoyed him just right or accused him of being shit at his job, the dual-haired asshat would divulge all the reasons he believed Katsuki could have “done better.” If he really got him going, Todoroki would viciously mock him and fight with him over how the mission could have been handled or taken care of in a million other ways than what Katsuki had actually done. Katsuki fought back just as viciously … for appearance's sake, course.
Uraraka was either super helpful or super fucking annoying. She was always exuberant and happy to help, always requesting to work on their reports together similar to how Kirishima would. But she was often pensive when writing her mission summary, just like Todoroki. Her writing process involved her splurging everything in great detail, mentally dumping as much information as possible without thought to structure or grammar. She never spoke out loud like Kirishima as it helped her to focus better so Katsuki was forced to wait until she had completed. Once she was finished with her report, she would immediately ask him opinion on its form to which Katsuki would use as an opportunity to glean as much information as possible while inputting his “thought” on the situation.
Rinse and repeat. He had been doing this long enough now that when his memory was unattainable, he was able to gather what he needed without tipping anyone off to his slip up. He quickly learned to apply these strategies and even other ones when he was assigned with other heroes as well. Thankfully, his memory didn’t slip too often to cause him much concern.
Lately, however …
Katsuki barely repressed a groan as he examined the bar from his booth in the far back. He had turned down Eijirou’s offer to hang out and play games tonight. He almost wanted to pretend he felt bad for blowing off his best and only friend, but he couldn’t muster the will to do so. As fun as playing video games and being with Eijirou had been in the past, he was beginning to feel the unbearable itch again. He hadn’t been sleeping for nearly a month now and barely managed to get anywhere from a five to ten minute nap when his body was just willing to give out. People had started commenting on the bags under his eyes and fuck all if he was going to let anyone get into his business.
His conquests the previous the night hadn’t been that satisfying, either. While the Alpha couple that had approached him were both physically attractive and pleasantly skilled partners, Katsuki hadn’t been able to escape his head once during the entire interaction. His inner omega had been greatly satisfied with the exchange, unashamedly basking in the attention of two partners who were more than happy to indulge his desires to be handled as roughly as possible. But it hadn’t mattered. It didn’t matter what position he was in or how harshly they used his mouth when he begged for it. It didn’t matter how brutally they both fucked into him at the same time, how they left dark bite marks along his collarbone and thighs. It didn’t matter how wonderful it felt to be caught between them, rocked back and forth roughly with a harsh grip in his hair and another on his hips. It didn’t matter when they fucked the breath out of his lungs or how he so desperately enjoyed it when they finally agreed to use their Alpha Orders on him. It didn’t matter that he had melted alongside his inner omega at just how fucking debauched and satisfyingly degraded he felt during those moments.
He still couldn’t sleep. After all of that, after being used as a virtual Omega sex slave (to which he had absolutely begged for and agreed to) he couldn’t keep his eyes closed and shut his mind off no matter how desperately he wanted to.
Katsuki let a growl escape him, not giving a shit at the surprised or confused expressions of the patrons nearest to him. He leveled them all with a dark scowl before returning back to the whiskey in his hand. Holy fucking shit, how he wished alcohol worked for him like it did for others. He had tested it out a few times to no avail. Sure, he could drink himself until he passed out, but he was unfortunately one of those individuals where alcohol made things so infinitely worse. His nightmares were more persistent, darker and twisted even. And the hangovers were definitely far worse than a sore and painful backside. There was also the fact that alcohol was harder to hide on duty or around the office than the occasional limp or dark bruise.
So what now? He had gone farther than he had ever done before with that Alpha couple. They had almost reminded him of Hansuke, what with how enthusiastic they were about making sure he was comfortable and enjoying his time the entire night. He and his inner omega had been finally sexually gratified after a long few months of hits and misses. So what was the next step? A full on gangbang?
Katsuki immediately grimaced at the thought. He was only just so comfortable with strangers seeing and using him like this.The idea of anymore than two or three people, irregardless of their second gender, having sex with him made him tense all over. There was no guarantee he would have control in those situations. He needed that guarantee more than anything. He’d had some shitty lays where his partner had decided to take things far past his comfort zone and Katsuki hadn’t hesitated even a second to almost ripping their throats out. So what exactly was he supposed to do now-
“You look like you’re having a wonderful fucking time” a feminine voice suddenly broke him out of his thoughts.
He glanced up with a scowl, lowly growling at whoever dared to disturb him while he was thinking. Hadn’t he made it fucking clear that he wanted to be alone? If not for his loud snarling earlier, surely his scent made it obvious to any dumbass within all of Japan that he had no interest in being disturbed.
“Is it okay if I sit here?” the woman asked.
Absolutely fucking not!
Without even waiting for his response, she sat down in the opposite side of the booth. Katsuki narrowed his eyes at her audacity and quickly began to analyze the stranger in front of him. She was a tall long-haired blonde with dark skin and golden eyes that seemed to glow in the lowlight. She was dressed in a gray hoodie with blue jeans and her hair up in a ponytail, quite a contrast to the other patrons. In fact, Katsuki was certain that they were the only ones who had elected to wear something casual to a notably more high-end kind of bar.
The small smile she sent him revealed a set of sharpened teeth, not quite like Shitty Hair’s but definitely sharp enough to split skin with a small bite. Katsuki immediately fought down the urge to contemplate what it might feel like to have those around his neck. He instead focused on the only other thing he could find of interest about the strange female in front of him. Her entire presence screamed confidence and the look she was sending gave him the impression she knew more than she was letting on.
It kinda pissed him off … but it intrigued him the tiniest bit. That was the only reason he wasn’t pushing her out of the booth altogether. At least, that’s the only thing he could come up with.
He was hit with a fucked up sense of deja vu.
“I’m Tsubaki” she finally said.
“Nobody asked” Katsuki bit back, tacking a long sip from his whiskey.
“And you are most definitely Katsuki,” Tsubaki continued with a laugh. “Akira and Ichiro told me you were something special.”
“Who the fuck is that and why should I bother to give a shit?” he drawled.
He would forever deny just how much her snort warmed his insides.
“Wow, so harsh,” Tsubaki joked. “I’ll be sure not to tell them that the beautiful Omega they met last night has already forgotten all about them.”
Katsuki shrugged. “They were a good lay. We had a fun time and that’s it.”
“But apparently not good enough” she smiled. Katsuki narrowed his eyes once more. She was leveling him with that look again.
“What do you want?” he asked.
“Cutting straight to the point. I like that,” Tsubaki replied. “Well, you’re probably wondering but I’ve occasionally shared a night or two with Akira and Ichiro myself-”
“I wasn’t and I can’t stress any further how much I really don’t fucking care” Katsuki interrupted. He hid his blush at another of her snorts in his whiskey as best he could.
“Okay, okay,” Tsubaki laughed. “Point is, they told me that while you guys had a great time, you seemed to be looking for something else.”
“And you think you can provide it for me?” Katsuki asked, making it quite clear in his tone just how little he believed in her.
He quirked an eyebrow up as Tsubaki got up from the booth and moved to stand beside him. Her expression was still all-knowing, but there was something steely in her eyes. Something … not all that unpleasant, actually. He met her stare head on all the same, unwilling to back down from whatever this thing they were doing was. He startled just the tiniest bit when her hand went to grip the back of his head, pulling just a little tightly at his hair. He let out a small warning growl, but otherwise made no move to stop her. He had had a few partners in the past who had hit on him this aggressively before, too, but none that intrigued him as Tsubaki. He couldn’t exactly put his finger on just why though …
“Do you know what my Quirk is, Ground Zero?” Tsubaki asked. “I don’t blame you if you don’t remember me. We had only met for a few seconds during the briefing for the hostage situation in Coruscant Prefecture.”
Katsuki definitely remembered bits of that mission. A group of villains with stealth and fighting based Quirks had taken an entire hospital hostage two months back. He and a few others like Icy Hot and Shitty Hair with more combative Quirks were stationed to take on the villains preventing others with agile and control type Quirks from entering the hospital and aiding the hostages when negotiations had ultimately proved null and void.
“You were with Eraserhead and Dead Eyes” he recalled.
“Dead Ey-oh, you mean Mind Jack!” Tsubaki said. “Yeah, I was stationed with them! My Quirk works best for stealth and information gathering after all! Do you remember me now?”
“You’re Spider Queen,” Katsuki said. He chose to ignore how her thumb began to gently glide up and down his neck, raising goose bumps on his skin. “Your Quirk let’s you see the best outcome in any situation.”
“Not exactly,” she corrected. “My Quirk gives me a plethora of information depending on what kind of situation I’m placed in. You could even say it’s more analysis based than anything. But you know why I was really assigned that mission?”
“I assume you’re going to tell me” Katsuki drawled. He tensed at the tight pull of his hair before Tsubaki went back to lightly rubbing his skin.
“My Quirk tells me what people want,” Tsubaki whispered, smirking when his glare transformed into surprised understanding. “Whether it be something as simple as a nap or something far more … intimate. It helped me give advice and direct the others from the control room and then later while engaging the villains. I tend to stay away from the spotlight too much since others knowing too much about my Quirk has been disadvantageous in the past.”
Katsuki swallowed heavily when she leaned in until her forehead was pressed against his.
“But it definitely has it perks outside of work” Tsubaki informed him, her voice teasingly more sultry than before.
He … didn’t have a response to that. This was becoming far more intriguing than he had initially thought it would. A small swell of hope rose within his chest.
“I’m going to try something, but only if you’re okay with me doing it,” Tsubaki said, her voice firm.
He didn’t even bother to think it over before nodding his consent.
“Good boy” she smiled and Katsuki flushed at the pet name. Then she suddenly pulled away from him, stepping back until she was a few booths away. She gave him that look again.
“Follow me” Tsubaki said, her voice laced heavily with an Order.
Katsuki blinked a few times before getting up from his seat. When he moved to leave some bills for his tab, he was surprised to see that a twenty was already lying there. He glanced back towards Tsubaki who merely shrugged before walking towards the exit, her Order pulling on his inner omega. For once, Katsuki was more than willing to follow without question.
Y'all are way too fucking thirsty for angst, holy fucking shit!
In all seriousness, I am blown away by how everyone has responded to this fic. I cannot voice enough how much I never seriously considered ever posting this one for several reasons. One, I thought that maybe there were already enough angst fics in this fandom. Two, a lot of angst fics follow the same story and I didn't have a full plot for this planned out until just now. Three, if I was going to ever do an angst fic, it was going to be absolutely heart-wrenching and it was going to motherfucking hurt.
But then I got hit with insane writer's block, revisited, edited and then posted this fic. To be honest ... I don't think this story is that great. I think it's actually quite shitty. And that's not me being self-deprecating. I just don't think it's my best writing. That's not gonna stop me from continuing this story, of course. I just ... don't think it's that good?????
Fun little tidbit: I'm pretty sure that Hansuke means "a very helpful friend/companion." I could be wrong, though, but it just felt appropriate :D
Chapter 3: The Fool
"You should really learn when to let things die. Not everybody wants to be saved."
April 4, 2022
There are very few people in his life that Shinsou Hitoshi is willing to pick up a call from at two am in the morning. There were his adoptive parents, of course, followed by his younger sister for whom he would especially never hesitate to answer. Sometimes he would get a random call from an old classmate for a reunion or get together and if he was feeling particularly inclined, he might consider answering it. Or maybe he wouldn’t. Most times it was just his agency and he would have to scramble to put on his costume in less than three minutes because of a sudden emergency.
The point being that when his ringtone began blaring at ass o’clock in the morning on the same day he was due for patrol in less than three hours, Hitoshi was mentally prepared to meld into the void. Letting out a low groan and a soft hush to his mate who had begun to stir, Hitoshi picked up his phone from the nightstand and answered it without a glance to who was responsible.
“This is Shinsou Hitoshi speaking” he yawned.
Hitoshi immediately launched himself out of bed, rushing around the room for a T-Shirt and some socks. A million horrible thoughts raced through his mind at the sound of his best friend’s broken voice. He didn’t give a single fuck if it ended up just being something as ridiculous as Izuku drinking alone and way too much at some seedy bar again. He needed to get to him now!
“Izuku, what’s wrong!?” he asked. “Where are you?”
Shouto was at his side not even a moment later, an All Might tee thrown haphazardly on backwards and his long hair in wild disarray. A breath left him at the fear and concern that was radiating from his mate, Shouto’s scent and eyes begging him for an explanation to which he had none. He motioned instead for Shouto to go to their dresser, thankful that his mate quickly picked up on what he needed.
Hitoshi’s heart clenched painfully at the loud sob that answered him, Shouto’s pained expression making it clear that he had heard it as well.
“Izuku, you have to tell me where you are, okay?” he tried again.
He quickly accepted the pair of sweatpants handed to him, wedging the phone in between his head and shoulder. Shouto was struggling with his own pair and nearly toppled over before managing to right himself again. Shouto then wrestled with a pair of socks next before quickly giving up and instead pulling his hair back into a disorderly bun to keep his ridiculously long locks out of his face.
“Take a few breaths,” Hitoshi instructed, handing Shouto his tennis shoes that he had left in their bedroom earlier that night. “You’re gonna be okay. Shouto and I are gonna come get you, but you have to calm down and tell us where you are.”
They were in the living room now, Shouto quickly moving to grab the car keys while Hitoshi struggled to pull his boots on. He patiently listened to Izuku’s shaky breaths, each accompanied with a small whimper or another loud sob. He was sorely tempted to mutter a prayer to whoever or whatever was willing to listen, to implore them to keep his friend safe.
“T-the shower ro-rooms at Miruko’s agen-agency,” Izuku finally managed to stutter out. “Kacchan-Oh God! Ka-Kacchan’s hurt!!!”
“What happened?” he prodded, wincing at Izuku’s harsh intake of breath. An image of his friend violently shaking came to mind. “Do we need to call an ambulance?”
“I do-don’t know!” Izuku wailed. “I ju-just found him like t-this and then-Fuck! I used an O-order on him, Hitoshi! He’s just staring at me l-like a broken doll!”
Hitoshi didn’t remember entering the car, but he was thankful Shouto was retaining some semblance of awareness for the both of them. He hardly reacted to the sudden harsh lurch of the car or the shrill screech of the tires as Shouto began to press way too hard onto the accelerator.
“Is he bleeding anywhere?” Shouto suddenly spoke.
“Izuku, I’m putting you on speaker-phone,” Hitoshi informed him. “Shouto wants to know if he’s bleeding. Does he have any open wounds that you can see?”
“His glands are-Fuck!” Izuku sobbed. “They’re almost t-torn out! I didn’t check anywhere else yet. I didn’t ev-even think to-”
“Do you need us to walk you through first response?” Hitoshi interrupted before the other could begin to panic and self-deprecate himself.
“N-no, I’m looking now” Izuku whimpered.
“Go through the list with us” Shouto encouraged.
He felt a swell of pride for his best friend when his voice slowly began to calm down just the slightest, reporting to them everything he could see. His stomach rolled violently at the scene Izuku was describing, his brain unable to fully accept the description of Bakugou’s injuries and behavior. An endless series of dark questions and possible explanations entered his mind, his scent souring dramatically with each new thought.
It just … it didn’t seem possible for something like what Izuku was describing to be real. It felt like a horribly twisted prank, a sick joke. A part of him wanted to completely reject the notion that anything like what he was speculating could have possibly have happened to Bakugou-but that’s what heroes were meant to do. He needed to take the information in, assess and analyze it. He needed to prepare himself and Shouto for whatever they were about to discover. He needed to help Izuku.
Hitoshi let out a loud gasp when Shouto suddenly swerved around a corner with a harrowingly sharp turn, almost hitting two cars in the lane next to them.
“Sorry” his mate gently apologized.
Fuck, his license is still suspended.
He fought down the internal panic and irritation he felt at forgetting something so crucial. He chose not to comment on the speed they were going or the fact that Shouto elected to press down even harder on the gas pedal despite what had just happened. Hitoshi quickly resolved to just not worry about his mate’s inevitable increased suspension (if not total revocation) until after this was all over.
“Listen to me, Izuku,” he instructed. “We’re going to call emergency services, okay? I’m gonna hang up for a bit, but I’ll call you right back, alright?”
“Ka-Kacchan wouldn’t want anyone to s-see him like this” Izuku argued.
Hitoshi tried again, wincing at the overprotective shift in the other’s tone. “We don’t know what happened to Bakugou and there’s no way we can figure out if there’s something like internal damage or-”
“Kacchan doesn’t like-”
“This isn’t the time to worry about Bakugou’s pride, Midoriya,” Shouto cut in. “He needs professional help. Focus on what you learned from your training. Try to picture him as an injured civilian instead if that helps. Stay with him and keep him stabilized until we or the paramedics get there. Bakugou needs you to be there for him.”
“O-okay” Izuku conceded with a wet sniffle.
Hitoshi let out a sigh of relief …
… and then immediately shouted at his mate when he mowed down a stop sign and then drove onto an empty sidewalk.
Izuku sniffled wetly when Hitoshi hung up and then rubbed his nose up against his arm, completely uncaring of the possible snot trail he had just left on his sleeve. A loud hiccup escaped him as he forced himself to face Kacchan again. He whimpered at his childhood friend’s blank stare, his neck still titled in submission. The lifelessness that had completely overtaken him was too much for Izuku to bear; Kacchan resembled a mangled corpse now more than a living being.
Who did this to you, Kacchan? Why would anyone do this to you?
His inner alpha whined in lamentation, perfectly voicing his complete sense of helplessness and hurt. Another sob escaped him despite his efforts. He felt so utterly pathetic and incompetent. He hadn’t even thought to call the paramedics first before reaching out to Hitoshi. He was a hero for fuck’s sake! He’s supposed to remain calm and rational in situations like this, not falling apart at the seams and crying so hard he could hardly see.
“I’m so sorry, Kacchan,” he whispered. “I’m worthless when it actually counts.”
He took several deep, shaky breaths and forced his self-loathing to dissipate. As painful as it was, he needed to give Kacchan his complete focus. Todoroki was right. Izuku had no doubt that Kacchan was going to hate him even more once he was well again. There was nothing he wanted more than to make up and rekindle their lost friendship, but this wasn’t about him. His wants were nothing now in comparison to Kacchan’s needs.
With a stronger sense of resolve, Izuku turned back to face Kacchan. He couldn’t help wincing just the slightest all the same. Everything in him was screaming at him to comfort his hurt childhood friend, but uncertainty and genuine terror kept him from reaching out. Kacchan had ran and then hid from him after all. There’s no telling what he would do if Izuku were to touch him.
Instead, Izuku settled himself a bit more comfortably on the tile and pushed down his own scent until it was nonexistent. He kept a steady eye on the other while he allowed his inner alpha to rise enough to take in his surroundings. A part of him wondered in the awful quiet of that shower room if Kacchan’s attacker might still be in the building or perhaps somewhere nearby. He bit his lip to keep in the sudden growl that threatened to erupt from his throat and pushed his inner alpha farther to the surface.
It was becoming increasingly difficult to keep a lid on his instincts as a furious rage began to stew violently within his gut. The urge to seek out Kacchan’s attacker, to hunt them down and tear them apart was overwhelming. While such thoughts would normally disturb him, Izuku didn’t bother to chastise himself in that moment for desiring such a bloody encounter. It was only his fierce need to protect Kacchan that kept him from pushing out territorial and hostile pheromones, no matter how much his inner alpha was frothing dangerously at the mouth.
Despite himself, Izuku leapt to his feet with a feral growl as his scent erupted into an violent explosion of deadly Alphan pheromones. He hardly even registered the fact that he had activated One for All until a gentle scent coaxed him back into awareness. He nearly wept in relief at the sight of Hitoshi peeking around the corner of the hallway, one step already into the shower room.
He trembled in mortification as the sound of terrified whimpers from behind him finally made its way to his ears. Shame flooded Izuku’s being as he turned back to face where Kacchan was curling in on himself, his neck still bare and tears beginning to fall down his cheeks once more. A sharp pain ran through his chest as he watched his childhood friend begin to let out heart wrenching sobs. Without thinking, he began to approach Kacchan again.
“Don’t,” Hitoshi ordered, gripping his shoulder firmly. “Stop pushing out your scent.”
He meekly nodded and was to quick to obey the Omegan Order despite his inner turmoil. Izuku noted that his best friend was exuding his scent at its full capacity, the shower room now drenched in Hitoshi’s unique pheromones. He almost wanted to shout with delight as Kacchan’s whimpering and tears stopped almost immediately once Hitoshi entered the stall. Izuku watched in fascination as Hitoshi crooned quietly over his childhood friend and how his scent had taken on a distinctly warm and almost fuzzy quality. In any other situation, Kacchan’s almost shy and innocent sniffs at the other Omega’s outstretched wrist would have been cute to him. Right now however, Izuku was simply grateful that Kacchan appeared somewhat calm for the first time that night.
The haze hadn’t completely disappeared from Kacchan’s eyes, but he wasn’t trembling in fear anymore. Izuku was proud to consider that a win.
I’m going to protect you, Kacchan. I won’t let anyone ever hurt you like this again.
Hitoshi narrowed his eyes in focus as Bakugou continued to timidly sniff at his outstretched wrist, taking note of how the other still remained curled around himself. A flash of annoyance shot through him at the lack of scent that Bakugou should be emitting right now at such an intimate act between Omegas. In fact, the entire area should be doused in distressed pheromones powerful enough to cause Izuku and him to gag.
And yet … there was nothing.
Hitoshi was no stranger to the darker side of heroics. He had chosen this path for a reason and as awful as his encounters had been with victims of assault, he did not regret his decision once. It had definitely shaken him up a little when he had come across his first sexual assault victim, their scent alone almost causing him to vomit outright. Years of mentoring and guidance from his fathers’ and mentors had thankfully prepared him for this possible outcome and he had been able to push through in order to help where he could.
The guilt was still there, of course. It wasn’t easy being a hero, regardless of whether one was underground or in the media spotlight. The questions and the guilt were always the same: What if I had gotten there sooner? What if I had pushed myself even harder? What if I had gone left instead of right? What if their lives were ruined because I wasn’t fast enough, strong enough?
Hitoshi hated that those thoughts were now directed towards Bakugou. He could only imagine what Izuku must be thinking.
He glanced back up to inspect the blonde Omega’s neck, something dark curling up inside him at the sight of the ugly mating marks over both destroyed scent glands. Hitoshi wasn’t a doctor, but he had a horrible suspicion that whatever damage that had been done to them would be permanent. Taking a risk, he attempted to slowly approach Bakugou further and was relieved to see the other’s form free of tension.
The blonde Omega was by no means relaxed, but Hitoshi noted that the other’s instincts had identified him as non-threatening for the time being. Using that to his advantage, he scooted closer until he was face to face with the other Omega. His frown deepened as he took in the additional mating marks he could see peeking from underneath the stained tank top. The theory he had been internally contemplating on the ride to Miruko’s agency was slowly starting to come to life before his very eyes.
Ever so cautiously, he gently angled Bakugou’s neck enough for him to take a deep sniff and had to bite back an enraged growl. He hadn’t expected to find Bakugou’s scent, but at the very least he had hoped he would be able to catch the scent of his attacker. With another glance back to the scarred mating marks on the other Omega’s collarbone and chest, Hitoshi came to several conclusions at once.
Someone removed the attacker’s scent. This isn’t the first time this has happened. Bakugou might know his attacker.
There was more to it, of course, but it was a place to start. Hitoshi was hesitant to inspect Bakugou any further or even make an attempt at questioning him. There was no way the distressed Omega was anywhere in the right mind to handle any of that at the moment. He made a note to inform the paramedics of Bakugou’s fragile state when they arrived-
“Midoriya, is Hitoshi with y-”
Everyone tensed at the terrified Omegan cry that erupted from Bakugou’s throat. Disregarding his own personal boundaries, Hitoshi wrapped his arms tightly around Bakugou and brought the other’s nose directly to his neck glands. He held on as Bakugou continued to wail and tremble, refusing to let go even when the other accidentally bit into him in his terror.
Hitoshi didn’t bother to see if Shouto and Izuku had left, trusting in the strength of his Order and the Alphas’ instinctual respect to obey it. He grunted at a particularly sharp bite to his collarbone and began to pump out comforting pheromones to his max ability. At first, Bakugou rejected it all, continuing to violently thrash and scream uncontrollably. Hitoshi let out a pained groan when his head forcefully hit the side of the toilet and then his chin scraped against the side of the stall. Despite his own hero training, Bakugou was able to push the violet Omega onto his back in his hysterical state. Hitoshi was quick to readjust and strengthen his hold around the other while attempting to fight off the sudden dizziness that clouded his head. He wrestled with the frightened Omega and shouted when Bakugou suddenly began to repeatedly hit his own head against tile floor, completely lost to his panic.
Hitoshi grit his teeth and grabbed a firm hold of Bakugou’s right wrist. He absolutely hated himself for what he was about to do, but he was running out of options to get Bakugou to calm down before he did something irreversible.
“I’m sorry, Bakugou” Hitoshi said.
A heavy breath escaped Bakugou as Hitoshi’s sharp teeth bit into his wrist gland. Hitoshi watched as the blonde Omega’s pupils fully dilated, his trembling fade away and his tears finally slowing once more. His own cheeks flushed as the steady warmth of the pack bond flowed throughout his entire being. He noted that Bakugou’s sickly pale skin did indeed look notably pinker. Careful not to spook the suddenly still Omega, Hitoshi brought his own wrist gland to rub against Bakugou’s and was not surprised to see the other’s gaze fixated on him.
A tidal wave of awkwardness took over Hitoshi’s being as Bakugou began to nuzzle him in curiosity, but he did very little to fight it. He had initiated a pack bond after all. It was only right that he let Bakugou’s inner omega inspect and take it in. He felt his cheeks flame hotter as the other Omega began to purr and rub their cheeks against one another, his nuzzling transforming from timidness into full blown aggressive pack marking.
Hitoshi didn’t even resist Bakugou biting into his own wrist gland. He couldn’t even fathom not giving whatever form of comfort the other so desperately wanted in that moment.
It wasn’t exactly ideal what he had just done, Hitoshi knew that. He had let his own panic get in the way of any proper rational thought. The paramedics would be here any second now and they surely would have some type of sedative with them to help calm down Bakugou. Still ...
The sight of Bakugou bashing his head into the floor in pure desperation wouldn’t escape his mind. Hitoshi couldn’t even begin to imagine what had happened to Bakugou to convince him and his inner omega that their only option was to-
Hitoshi refused to complete that train of thought.
Sharing a pack bond with Bakugou was a minor inconvenience in the long term. Sure, it would be awkward as hell to even begin explaining to his mate what he had just done, but he couldn’t see Shouto actually being upset with him for it. As for Bakugou’s reaction when things “settled down,” Hitoshi was prepared to deal with whatever the other Omega had to throw at him.
When a steady gloved hand gently touched his shoulder, Hitoshi blinked his eyes in recognition before flushing deeper at the loud purring Bakugou was emitting. He gave a small nod to the paramedic above him (thankfully a Beta) and gently guided Bakugou off of him. The whine the blonde Omega gave as Hitoshi made room for the paramedics tugged at his heart and he found himself torn between leaving Bakugou to the professionals or returning to his side.
“Did you leave this pack marking just now?” another paramedic (also a Beta) asked.
“He was hurting himself and I couldn’t think of anything else to do … “ Hitoshi tensely replied, awkwardness accidentally slipping into his scent.
The paramedic gave a light hum before returning back to inspecting Bakugou. He watched in a trance as another paramedic (thank fuck, also an Omega) appeared around the corner with a stretcher and the other two began prepare a sedative. Throughout it all, he was unable to keep his gaze off of the other Omega. Bakugou was already lethargic due to their new bond, but he was barely able to keep his eyes open now as the sedative quickly made its way through his bloodstream. The paramedics gently and professionally loaded him onto the stretcher and began to wheel him out of the shower room. Bakugou continued to let out small whines here and there, but they were noticeably less pain-ridden than the ones Hitoshi had become eerily familiar with. No, he recognized the whines for what they were; Bakugou didn’t want him to leave.
“I’ll see you soon,” he promised. “I’m not leaving.”
His stomach sank when Bakugou finally disappeared around the corner, his inner omega tensing at the loss of his new packmate. Taking a shaking breath, Hitoshi calmed himself and made his way out into the agency hallway where his mate and best friend dutifully stood waiting.
“Izuku offered his car since ours is … not working right now,” Shouto greeted him. “But he doesn’t think he’ll be able to drive right now and I wasn’t sure if you would want me-”
“I got it” Hitoshi sighed.
“I called Mi-Miruko” Izuku said. “The hospital was going to call her anyway since it’s policy to call the head of the agency when-when emergencies happen. I th-thought it would be better for her to hear-hear about Kacchan now instead of waiting.”
Hitoshi winced at the slight trembling of Izuku’s form. The image of Bakugou’s bloodied forehead and panicked expression suddenly crashed to the forefront of his mind. Before he knew what he was doing, Hitoshi was hugging Izuku tightly to him and began to gently nuzzle him. A few tears of his own escaped as his best friend began to weep again, but he was pleased to feel Izuku return the hug. He willed his scent to encompass and warm the distraught Alpha.
He almost laughed when Shouto’s scent greeted him when he went to rub at Izuku’s neck glands.
“He’s going to be okay, Izuku,” Hitoshi whispered. “Bakugou’s going to be okay. Whoever did this to him, they’re never going to get another chance, alright? We will never let that happen again.”
“He didn’t even recognize me,” came Izuku’s shaky reply. “He thought-he thought I was going to hurt him!”
“We all know that you would never do that. You didn’t hurt him, Izuku. You protected him and that is what’s important.”
“Kacchan’s going to hate me. He’s going to hate me even more.”
Hitoshi pulled back for a moment and gently held his best friend’s face. He wiped away what tears he could before managing to bring out what he hoped was a small, comforting smile.
“You saw something was wrong and you stepped in. Bakugou can say he hates you all he wants, but that’s what being a hero is, right? Sticking our noses into things that we really have no business doing so in the first place. Bakugou didn’t need a friend back there. He needed a hero.”
“Hitoshi’s right,” Shouto chipped in. “You did everything you were supposed to and more. It doesn’t matter if Bakugou and you aren’t friends. You chose to help him despite all of your history. Not everyone is capable of doing that.”
“Th-thank you” Izuku hiccupped.
“Let’s get going, huh?” Hitoshi gently asked.
At Izuku’s small nod, the group made their way down the hallway and to the agency parking lot. Hitoshi made a mental note to call his own agency as he slid into the driver’s seat. He wasn’t surprised that Shouto elected to sit in the backseat with Izuku, gently encouraging the freckled Alpha to nuzzle into his neck glands. He met his mate’s mismatching eyes in the rearview mirror. For a brief moment they simply held each other’s gaze, a silent understanding spoken between them.
Bakugou wasn’t the only one who was going to need help tonight.
Shouta raised an eyebrow at the caller ID. It wasn’t as though he wasn’t used to receiving phone calls this late at night; far from it. He had made a career out of late night patrols and even married a man whose radio show would begin around the same time. Hell, his adopted son had followed in his footsteps and it wasn’t uncommon for the two of them to interact during their own patrols. It would be even stranger if he didn’t receive a phone call or two while out at night.
Still … it wasn’t often that his own agency would bother him while on his shift, let alone call his personal cell. Something had gone horribly wrong.
“Eraserhead speaking” he answered.
“You’re being called to Mustafar General,” his agency head informed him. “A former student of yours, Bakugou Katsuki, has been admitted and your presence is required.”
“I don’t understand” Shouta replied, his capture gear activated. He effortlessly scaled down the building he was previously on and continued freerunning towards his destination, Mustafar General thankfully not too far from where he was now.
“He needs to undergo surgery, but there are various risks and factors that he is currently unable to give consent to,” his agency head explained. “It appears that he selected you in the event something like this were ever to occur.”
“Got it. Be there in five minutes.”
Shouta couldn’t even begin to understand why Bakugou of all his students would select him for this sort of role, but it didn’t matter. His only priority at that moment was to get to Mustafar General as quickly as possible and ensure that his former student recovered. He could question Bakugou’s logic (or lack thereof) later.
He couldn’t help the small amount of anxiety that entered him at the thought of what could have happened to his student. He had accepted that his students were adults now and heroes in their own rights. They were colleagues at this point. Despite all of this, it seemed his protective instincts had never actually left.
How fucking troublesome.
Did you miss me? ;)
What is an Order? I like the idea of Orders being a direct call to someone's inner Alpha/Beta/Omega. It's kinda like a direct call/link to an individual's instincts. However, I don't like the idea of Orders being impossible to fight off and I like the idea of Orders being something that all dynamics can do, not just Alphas. I kinda see it from the perspective of age, experience and personality have a stronger influence on how impactful an Order is. All Orders can be fought off, but the individual behind the Order can have an even bigger influence than the instinctual pull to obey.
Hence why Shouto and Izuku are willing to obey Hitoshi's Order, but also why Omega and Beta Heroes can't be controlled by a villain Alpha. Does that make sense or do I need to elaborate more? XD
Basically, Shouto and Izuku know and respect Hitoshi so they're willing to obey his Order. If Hitoshi had been a stranger or presented himself as a threat to Katsuki, they would have ignored it. God, I hope I'm not fucking up this explanation.
Alright, here's the format, folks. There's going to be alternating chapters: Present Time and Katsuki flashback. This will continue until the flashbacks catch up with Present Time. Also, flashbacks are probably just going to be longer chapters in general. I'm still going to attempt to keep OC involvement down to a minimum as much as possible, but I promise their presence is there for very particular reasons.
So if BakugouxOC sex or interactions bothers you, I promise they'll be gone pretty fucking soon D:
I would like to apologize for not updating this fic sooner, but the main reason is mostly due to the amount of research I've been doing for this story. I know it's fanfiction and I can technically write "whatever I want," but I like adding elements of realism where I can. I think it just comes together better if I do.
I do plan on this fic being one of my longer running ones and I'm very excited with the reception it's gotten so far. Thanks to everyone who has chosen to stick around! :D
P.S. Chapter titles are based on what Katsuki thinks of himself and his situation. Forgot to mention that in the previous chapters, so have fun with that!
Chapter 4: The Degenerate
"What even made you think I ever wanted your fucking help? That I ever needed it in the first place."
Warning: Two more BakugouxOc sex scenes as well as a passage featuring a severe panic attack.
June 17, 2018 (continued)
Tsubaki’s apartment was interesting to say the least. The furniture came in a variety of clashing colors, themes and styles giving Katsuki the distinct impression that she either didn’t care or hadn’t gotten enough money yet to unify anything. A huge part of him suspected that it was a bit of both. The wide array of posters featuring everything from competitive online video games to cult classic horror films and a few Broadway musicals only furthered added to the wild disarray of contrasting themes.
It was kinda nice, actually. A bit chaotic, but it felt like something perfectly Tsubaki.
Katsuki attempted to occupy himself with inspecting a shelf of DVDs, Tsubaki’s new Order to wait for her still thrumming throughout him. God, how he was dying to know what her second gender was. Like all professional heroes, she wore scent blockers while out in public. Katsuki wasn’t exactly surprised to discover that she chose to wear them in private as well, but damn if it didn’t make him curious as fuck. Hopefully he would find out soon.
He scratched at his bare arm idly as he read off the titles of films in a language he didn’t understand, doing his best to avoid feeling too self-conscious about his state of undress. It wasn’t like this was his first time being naked in someone else’s home. The past year had only proven just how okay he was with that concept. He had welcomed Tsubaki’s Order with enthusiasm, excited to see what she had in store for him. As the minutes ticked by, however, he felt himself beginning to grow a bit antsy and was almost tempted to try fighting her Order off. It wouldn’t be too hard since Tsubaki had laid it on quite light. Probably so he would still feel some semblance of control before they started whatever it was she had in mind.
“Has anyone ever told you that you have a great ass?”
Katsuki swiveled around and smirked, confidently crossing his arms. He didn’t know what he had been expecting when Tsubaki had told him to wait, but he sure as fuck hadn’t expected to see her coming back with her hair up in a towel and pair of regular gray boy shorts. He eyed her bare breasts for a moment before returning his attention back to her teasing smile.
“Only everyone ever” he responded. He felt the warmth in his chest build up even more when she snorted again.
“How foolish of me to assume otherwise” she teased back.
Katsuki still had no idea where any of this was going, but he could physically feel himself relax by the second the longer he spent in Tsubaki’s presence. He felt an air of excitement settle over him for the first time since Hansuke and he desperately hoped that tonight wouldn’t be another disappointment.
“I have a few ideas of where we could start from,” Tsubaki said. She pulled her hair from the towel and rubbed at it a few more times before tossing it into a laundry basket nearby. “But I think we should talk a little bit first.”
She moved past him to sit down in the center of her couch. Katsuki merely watched her, still not completely sure as to where this was going. A small swell of nervousness started to overtake him when Tsubaki continued to stare at him for a moment longer, her expression turning thoughtful. He noticed how her eyes seemed to glow again, how they shimmered unnaturally the longer she took him in. It was equal parts intriguing as well as it was unnerving.
“Would it make you feel more comfortable if we had a little fun first?” she finally asked. “I’m getting the impression that you would like something a little more … routine? You know, before I offer you my ‘proposal.’”
Katsuki let out a near inaudible sigh, a bit embarrassed at how obvious his slight discomfort was showing. Then again, it could have just been her Quirk. Either way, he was grateful that she wasn’t forcing him to voice his anxieties and instead offering something he was a little more used to.
“I’m guessing that’s a yes?” Tsubaki pressed.
“Thought you knew what I wanted” he quipped instead.
Tsubaki shook her head with a smile before answering.
“I want you to feel safe, Katsuki,” she said. “I’m not just gonna start making decisions for you. There’s also the fact that just because you might want something, that doesn’t mean you fully understand what that is or how you want it. Besides, I don’t use my Quirk like that.”
“So what now?” Katsuki asked.
“Well, how would you feel about me using an Order on you again?” Tsubaki offered. “I’ll make sure it’s weak enough again so that you can fight it off if you don’t like anything I do. You like things a bit rougher, right? I can work my way up to that if that sounds interesting to you?”
“That’s fine” he quickly agreed, impatient to finally get things started.
He lightly blushed again at Tsubaki’s snort before she collected herself. He watched in fascination as her whole body and facial expression settled back into that confident and all-knowing persona he had encountered only half an hour ago.
Katsuki immediately moved to obey until he was standing in front of her. He peered down at her as she leaned forward and began to lightly run her hands up and down his thighs. A shaky breath escaped him when she moved to suck a hickey right below his belly button.
“Akira and Ichiro definitely had fun with you, I see” she teased. Katsuki gave a low moan when she lightly bit into a bruise closer to his hip before returning back to suck and bite a new mark a little lower. Katsuki purred happily at the sudden feel of a wet tongue running alongside his cock before being replaced with a firm grip.
“You know, it’s kinda mean that you forgot their names so quickly,” Tsubaki commented. “They sure couldn’t get enough of you.”
Katsuki huffed out a moan at another particularly heavy lick and long stroke before answering.
“Sounds like I was the better performer then” he bantered.
“You really like to be the asshole bad boy, don’t you?” she laughed. “Take a step back.”
Katsuki did let out a small Omegan whine at that, but Tsubaki merely shook her head and waited for him to accept her Order. With another roll of his eyes he acquiesced and watched as she stood up, pulling his head down just the tiniest bit in order to meet her kiss. He sighed into it, loving the way her hands roughly scraped his scalp and how her tongue moved languidly against his. Feeling emboldened, he reached a hand up to softly knead at her breast and brought her closer against him with his other. He smirked at Tsubaki’s small giggle before pulling back from the kiss to bite down at the side of her neck, sucking delicately around her scent glands.
“If I didn’t know any better,” Tsubaki murmured. “I’d think you were trying to be sweet with me.”
“If you knew me,” Katsui countered with a small bite to her gland. “You’d know that I’m starting to think you’re all talk.”
“Oh, really now?” she chuckled. “Are you ready for me to get mean, Katsuki?”
“You don’t have a mean bone in your body” he countered, his scent betraying his excitement.
A harsh breath left him when his inner omega acquiesced to her Order, tilting his neck and giving her perfect access to his glands. His hands gripped her hips tightly at the feel of sharp teeth pricking at his collarbone, unable to keep himself from grinding into her just the slightest. He swallowed heavily when her tongue slipped out to trail a path up to his neck, panting heavily as she bit into the skin between his neck and shoulder.
“Maybe I wanted to take care of you for a bit before I wrecked you,” she growled. Katsuki’s breath audibly hitched at the sudden sharp and cold authoritative tone of her voice. “Maybe I wanted you to have a little fun before I used you like my own special toy, Omega.”
The slight growl to Tsubaki’s voice as she yanked harshly on his hair again did absolute wonders to him, his entire body shaking pleasantly at how she handled him.
“Or do you want me to call you something else?” Tsubaki continued. “Omega’s a little too vague for someone as pretty as you, don’t you think? You need a proper title when you’re like this before me.”
Katsuki audibly moaned when she moved to pull off her boy shorts, his excitement increasing at the slow reveal of skin. He gasped in surprise when his head was suddenly yanked so painfully hard that tears welled up in his eyes. A none too gentle grasp of his chin had him gaping dumbly at Tsubaki once again, her glowing golden eyes burning impossibly brighter into his. He felt himself slick up as her lips curled into a delicious dark smirk.
“Keep your eyes on me when I’m talking to you.”
Again, Katsuki more than gladly succumbed to her Order, practically melting in her grasp. He felt his inner omega begin to rise and take over as Tsubaki’s gaze began to seemingly transform into something far more predatory. Almost mocking and condescending even, her golden eyes keeping him pinned in place when she did let go of him.
“That’s better,” Tsubaki purred. “You wanna be good for me, don’t you? You don’t want to disappoint me, right?”
Katsuki only moaned in response. He could feel himself hardening impossibly more now, traces of precum and even more slick beginning to leak out of him. He continued to stare with half lidded eyes as Tsubaki went back to taking off the boy shorts, kicking them to the side before stroking a hand through his hair. A steady purr began to rumble out of him as she continued to not so gently pet him, her fingers occasionally pulling and grasping at strands of his hair.
“Already making a mess, I see,” Tsubaki chuckled. “Let’s see what we can do about that.”
Another pleased groan escaped him when she began to stroke him just a bit faster. He whined when she would twist him just the slightest, when she would trace his folds with her fingers and when she would bite and suck teasingly around his neck glands.
“Slut doesn’t quite fit you, either,” Tsubaki mused, biting at his earlobe. “How about ‘little prince?’ Since you like to think of yourself as royalty, huh?”
He barely had a chance to roll his eyes before Tsubaki suddenly knelt down and began mouthing at his dick again. He watched completely transfixed as she sucked at the tip and along the slit all while maintaining eye contact with him with that all-knowing stare. Katsuki shuddered when she suddenly moved to take him even further in her mouth, wondering for a brief second if this angle was actually awkward for her or not before losing that train of thought completely when her tongue rubbed up against a particular vein. He let out a louder purr when her other hand moved to grab firmly at his ass, pulling him forward and encouraging him to fuck into her mouth. He did so slowly, careful to avoid gagging her right out the gate. He had been on the giving end himself plenty of times, after all, and he abnormally felt like being a gentleman for once.
When she moved his right hand to grip her hair and then grabbed his ass again with both hands, he took it as the go ahead to start rocking a bit harder. Small gasps and whines escaped him as Tsubaki sucked wonderfully around him and took him deeper each time. He felt traces of slick begin to languidly slide down from in between his folds, moaning again when Tsubaki slid a finger in to stroke at his inner walls. Katsuki found himself unable to break her gaze, her eyes lidded but still open and watching him all the while. He could feel himself starting to become lost in her golden gaze, unable to look away for a moment despite how much brighter it kept getting. Every so often Tsubaki would grip him harder from behind and encourage him to thrust faster, her nails biting pleasantly into his ass. Fuck, he hoped she left marks.
So far nothing new was happening that he hadn’t already experienced, but Katsuki wasn’t exactly complaining. Then again, most partners he had before weren’t exactly keen on straight up giving him a blow job, let alone letting him face-fuck them. Most preferred to instead focus on his folds or even his rim. He could probably count three or so who had been quick to blow him, all of which were that first female Omega, a Beta and Omega couple a few months back, and a plain Alpha he was still pathetically trying to get over. He didn’t know if it had something to do with the fact that being an Omega meant his dick was smaller in comparison or maybe it was just a more popular kink to focus on his cunt instead. He honestly didn’t care which area got paid more attention to just so long as he got fucked in the end. Tsubaki, however, was definitely winning some points from him right now. Especially when she moved to take his cock all the way and then held him there for a good five seconds before gagging. And then continually repeated to do so until he became desperate and had to start fucking into her mouth harder and faster.
He barely withheld a small whine of disappointment when she pulled off and slowly began stroking his cock with one hand again, looking up at him with a gentle smile.
“Enjoying yourself?” she teased.
“Definitely would enjoy it more if you let me finish” he replied, thrusting into her grip.
“That so?” Tsubaki smiled. “And how would you like to do that?”
“Don’t care, just get me off” Katsuki huffed.
“So easy to please.”
He flushed at her amused giggle and the pleased hum she made when she took him back in again. He moaned loudly at the small vibration and barely registered the sting of Tsubaki’s nails before he was fucking into her mouth harder. Without realizing it, he wound both his hands into her long hair and gripped the strands tightly. A part of him wants to feel bad for how roughly he’s treating Tsubaki, but any attempt he has made to slow his pace or loosen his grip only resulted in her increasing her efforts impossibly further. Her eyes would narrow further and glint brighter before she’d pull back and suck hard around the head of his cock. Katsuki couldn’t help the loud whine he let out when two fingers started to thrust in and out of his heat at the same time Tsubaki went back to swallowing him whole once more.
It was only when Katsuki was absolutely sure that he was going to lose his fucking mind, that everything finally came to a blinding crescendo. He couldn’t help his loud whimpers as Tsubaki’s fingers continued to trace and pet his insides, almost as though she was encouraging as much of his slick to escape as possible. He whined when she finished licking up his cum to then mouth at the slick she gathered on her fingers and then went to swipe her tongue against his folds. Shaky breaths wouldn’t stop leaving him while Tsubaki continued to lick and feast on him. Katsuki could feel actual tears start to well up in his eyes at the overstimulation, loving and hating the torture she was forcing upon him. He sighed loudly in relief when she finally stood up and guided him to lie down on her couch.
His limbs felt completely heavy and numb, barely able to register the faint warmth Tsubaki’s body gave when she crawled forward to lie atop him. He all but melted when she began to idly run one of her hands up and down his chest in a soothing motion, her own rumbling purr answering his in kind. There was something almost sweet about the way she settled her cheek against his left pec and the way her humming lightly vibrated against his skin.
“You’re really too fucking beautiful, Bakugou Katsuki,” Tsubaki quietly said. “But you already knew that, didn’t you? Such a perfect little prince.”
He could only purr harder in response. Maybe later when he was back at his own apartment and in his own bed, he would feel horribly embarrassed by how much her praise affected him in that moment. Maybe he would damn himself again for being such an absolute fucking idiot every single time one of his partners had praised him during sex and in the afterglow. Maybe he’d promise himself just one more time that he wouldn’t let a few compliments turn his mind into utter mush like a stereotypical, easy Omega.
“Boy shorts, huh?” Katsuki murmured when reality finally came back to him.
“You really liked those, didn’t you?” Tsubaki grinned, her sharp teeth on full display. “Yeah, I wasn’t really feeling up to wearing lace tonight, but I got the impression you wouldn’t be disappointed if I chose to wear something a little more comfy. That and I wasn’t entirely sure whether or not you’d bolt if I came out wearing a corset and stilettos.”
Katsuki blinked. Three times.
“Corset?” he repeated, dragging the word out. “You … oh. Wait. You, um?”
“Take your time” Tsubaki teased.
“Wait, so this was-oh” he scrambled. He hated how hotly he flushed at Tsubaki’s laughter, a long series of snorts escaping her.
Fuck, why is that so cute to me?
“No, no” she giggled. “That was just us having sex. I asked if you were nervous earlier, remember? You wanted to have some fun just in case you didn’t like what I was gonna offer you. At least, that’s what I gathered from my Quirk.”
“You think I want to do … BDSM” Katsuki stated.
“I think you want to be controlled while feeling in control,” Tsubaki corrected. “You definitely have a penchant for rougher sex, but it’s not doing anything for you anymore, right? You have an itch that’s not getting scratched and you’re getting bored because of it.”
“Your Quirk’s gonna grate on my nerves at some point, isn’t it?” he said instead.
“Hey, be nice!” Tsubaki giggled. “Anyway, I’m currently without a sub at the moment and you need someone who can get you out of your head for a while without pushing you past your comfort zone. Win-win, eh? We’ll have to talk about it in a lot more detail, though, before you agree to anything. I’m not gonna dom you without hearing your interests and turn-offs.”
“You want me to tell you that I’m not into piss and shit?” Katsuki drawled.
“Essentially, yes,” Tsubaki said. “I told you I don’t use my Quirk like that so I’m not just gonna assume what you’re into. I’m not a mind reader, despite what people tend to think. My Quirk gives me a plethora of information, but it’s not always as accurate as everyone expects it to be. I can get a very good idea of what it is exactly that you want, but that doesn’t mean the information is always correct. People change their minds every second or so all the time. It can honestly be a fucking nightmare to focus on a target for too long.
“I’ve gotten better at it over the years, though. I can usually sort out what is a fleeting desire or what’s really important to that person. But there’s always gonna be a time when I just have to give my best guess based on the information I’m given. You get where I’m going with this, right? It doesn’t matter if my guesses turn out to be correct. I’m not going to just assume I’m correct and then start making decisions for you.
“That and I like sitting down and discussing what my subs know they like or want to experiment with. It’s a lot of fun being able to share that and in my experience, it’s another step that helps us bond better as a dom and sub.”
“Sounds tedious and embarrassing” Katsuki huffed.
Although … he couldn’t say he wasn’t intrigued by what Tsubaki was offering him. He knew a little about what BDSM entailed, but he had never seriously contemplated doing it until that moment. He wasn’t exactly opposed to the idea even. He was just … a little unsure if this would actually help him sleep again.
“You can think it over, you know?” Tsubaki told him. “I’m not expecting you to give me an answer right this second. I’m still open to seeing you again even if you decide this isn’t something for you. I’m totally fine with being friends with benefits. You can ask me some questions, too, if you’re curious.”
“No, I’m … open to it,” Katsuki slowly answered. “I just don’t know what all of this will end up being. And I’m starting to get really sick of looking for someone new all the time.”
“I feel you there,” she sighed sympathetically. A quiet, content purr escaped him when she ran a hand softly down his back and up to his hair again. “One night stands are like an annoying random generator or something.”
“Or something” he repeated.
A comfortable silence enveloped them. Katsuki closed his eyes for a moment in an attempt to gather himself. What Tsubaki was offering … it sounded almost too good to be true. Maybe this was what he really had been looking for: control while being controlled. The more he thought about it, the more everything seemed to fit better into place. Ever since Hansuke had alluded that he might be looking for something else, Katsuki had just assumed that maybe what he desired was rougher and more demeaning types of sex. Which he had admittedly ended up being really into, but he had never entertained the idea that what he actually desired might have been to be ‘dominated.’ It was almost pathetically ridiculous that the thought had never entered his mind even once while he begged for Alphas to man-handle him or for Betas and Omegas to ‘force’ him to submit. The idea of Tsubaki domming him was too good of an opportunity to pass up.
“So what do I call you then?” he asked her.
“I mean, I’m supposed to call you something, right?” Katsuki explained. He frowned when Tsubaki appeared to be thinking it over, going so far as to dramatically place her head in her chin and hum out loud as though in deep thought.
“You can call me Milady” she finally said, her eyes twinkling with amusement.
Katsuki couldn’t help but snort. Her answer, while a bit irritating, did make him feel just the tiniest bit less anxious.
“You gonna hang me from the ceiling and put me in a gimp suit?” he joked.
“No, of course not,” Tsubaki said. “Unless that’s what you’re into.”
Katsuki barked out a laugh at her cheeky wink.
June 25, 2018
“This movie is fucking shit” Katsuki drawled.
He rolled his eyes at the over the top gasp Eijirou gave him, shoving him a bit roughly when the dumbass attempted to crawl too close into his personal space. He couldn’t help letting out a loud snort when Eijirou simply rolled off the couch and fell onto the floor in a tangle of limbs. Even the mock teary-eyed expression his best friend gave him in response was too good to not let out a snicker or two at. Alphas and their overdramatic reactions to everything under the fucking sun. How fortunate Katsuki was to somehow land himself with the most clingy and emotional of them all.
“Whoa, you do not get to insult the most amazing movie in all existence when we’re literally only three minutes into it!” Eijirou screeched.
“What’s so great about a mom dropping her kid off in the middle of nowhere with some randos just so she can go fuck her new trophy husband?” Katsuki snarked.
“Okay, no!” Eijirou shouted, pausing the movie on his laptop. “You do not get to trash on Secondhand Lions, which I repeat once more is the greatest movie ever, without even giving it a try!”
“I gave it a try,” Katsuki argued. “Movie’s boring as shit.”
“You do not get to insult me on movie night, man!” Eijirou whined. “I even bought the beer and pizza to celebrate the new place!”
“You bribed Pinky for her shitty alcohol,” Katsuki snickered. “And I didn’t tell you to do any of that. You were the one who was so insistent on paying for everything all because you wanted to make a big deal out of nothing. We could have just split it like we always do.”
“Getting your own place is a big deal!” Eijirou insisted. “Dude, we’re adults now! We graduated U.A. and we’re real Pros! We can actually use our Quirks to fight off villains without constantly getting harassed about breaking the law all the time!”
“It’s almost been a month and you still haven’t gotten over graduation?” Katsuki asked, reaching for another slice of pizza. “Didn’t you get accepted into Fat Gum’s agency two weeks ago? Why aren’t we celebrating that instead?”
“The same reason you didn’t want to celebrate that you got accepted into Miruko’s,” Eijirou explained. “Or that you’re her first ever sidekick! We’ve been mentoring under them for almost two and a half years now. It was pretty much guaranteed at this point, man. This, though. This is really exciting!”
Katsuki took a bite of his slice.
“You’re stupidly easy to please sometimes.”
“Yeah, well I’m not gonna apologize for being happy for you!” Eijirou smiled.
“Eat your expensive ass pizza” Katsuki snorted.
“You’re stupidly emotionally constipated.”
“Eat your goddamn pizza.”
Katsuki lent a hand out and aided Eijirou back off the floor. He still kicked him in the shin when the idiot accidentally sat too close to him again, but otherwise they both ate in comfortable silence. As annoying and overbearing as he could get sometimes, Katsuki couldn’t deny how grateful he was that Eijirou had tried so hard to befriend him. He had never thought that he would genuinely enjoy a relationship as close to the one he now held with the clingy Alpha. In fact, a small part of him had been worried that Eijirou was trying to court him during their first year like every dumbass Alpha he had heard about. The only thing worse than a clingy, friendly Alpha was a clingy, ‘romantically’ determined Alpha.
It had a taken an extremely embarrassing and awkward as fuck conversation during one of their study sessions for things to finally be cleared up. Katsuki had still been skeptical, of course, but Eijirou had just been too damn genuine for him to question the other’s motives anymore. He certainly hadn’t expected the other to care about his well-being so much or to actively seek him out at every opportunity. He almost reminded Katsuki of a dumb puppy with the way Eijirou would follow him around and encourage him at every turn. Their friendship was almost too good to be true and yet Katsuki knew without a doubt that they would always be there for each other, no matter what. Maybe that knowledge was what had finally given him the courage to ask Eijirou to be his packmate at the end of their second year.
He could confidently say he had never regretted that first bonding, nor did he regret the newer and stronger ones they had made since then. Sure, Eijirou was a dumbass, clingy as fuck Alpha who had only gotten even more insufferable as the result of their bond. But Katsuki had known what he was signing up for when he had asked in the first place.
“Being Miruko’s sidekick sure does seem to have its perks” Eijirou suddenly commented after a beat. Katsuki raised an eyebrow in confusion as he grabbed for his drink.
“You act like this place is a fucking penthouse,” Katsuki said. “There’s only one bedroom and it’s so small that I can stretch my arms out and touch both walls. The entryway is pretty much just the kitchen and living room combined. The bathroom literally took us fucking hours to clean properly-”
“Only because you’re a neat freak-”
“And the stupid ass elevator is still out of commision because my landlord turned out to be a fucking cheapskate! We had to walk down and back five flights of stairs the entire fucking day.”
“This place is a penthouse for someone who just got out of high school” Eijirou insisted.
“You have shitty ass standards as always, Hair for Brains” Katsuki drawled.
“Dude, I still have to room with Kami and Sero,” Eijirou snorted. “And those two aren’t exactly as quiet as they think they are.”
“That’s what you get for agreeing to room with those idiots,” Katsuki snorted, taking a long swig of his beer. “Don’t complain about shit you got yourself into.”
“You’re so mean to me!” Eijirou whined. Katsuki audibly growled when his friend moved to wrap his arms tight around his middle and wail into his ear.
“Get the fuck off me, Shitty Hair!” Katsuki shouted, hitting Eijirou hard over the head and kicking wildly into the air.
“Ow! Bakugou, chill!” Eijirou laughed. “Give me attention! Ow, ow!”
Katsuki let loose another growl when the dumbass went to nuzzle his scent glands before moving to rub his cheek against his. A loud, feral hiss escaped him at the overpowering waves of comforting and bonding pheromones Eijirou was drenching the area around them in. He squirmed in the clingy Alpha’s tight hold with vicious hisses and snarls. He ignored the coaxing Alphan croons and disappointed whines his best friend would give when he would wildly twist his head and neck away to keep the other from initiating another packmarking.
“LET ME GO, YOU DUMBASS BRAINLESS ALPHA!” Katsuki screamed in frustration.
“I love you, too, Bakugou!” Eijirou replied.
“I WILL CRACK YOUR FUCKING SKULL OPEN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!”
“I’LL RIP YOUR FUCKING KNOT OFF! I’LL RIP YOUR THROAT OUT AND CHOKE YOU WITH IT!!!”
“BOND WITH ME!”
“YOU CLINGY ASS, STUPID FUCKING PIECE OF USELESS SHIT ALPHA!”
Katsuki growled at Eijirou’s pleasant laughter and the clear enjoyment his inner omega felt with his packmate so happy and so close to him. He felt a dark smirk overtake him when a well placed kick to Eijirou’s stomach had the Alpha letting out a grunt and loosening his arms just enough for Katsuki to wildly scramble out of the idiot’s hold. Just as soon as he escaped, Katsuki gripped the other and flipped him off the couch once again with far more force than was clearly necessary. He took pride in the loud thud that took place and how one of the beers toppled off the coffee table onto the wood floor due to the sheer force of it all.
“Fuck,” Eijirou groaned. “Fuck, I think you broke my everything.”
“Exactly as you deserve” Katsuki grinned.
“Harsh, man,” Eijirou replied. “Harsh.”
“Bitch, you wish I was your bitch.”
Laughter erupted out of Katsuki so hard that his sides started to horribly ache. He ignored the victorious smile Eijirou was sending him, too focused on encouraging what air he could back into his lungs. He didn’t even try to fight it when Eijirou finally got up and wrapped his arms around him again in a gentle, loose hug. As he took deep breaths, the scent of his packmate’s contentment washed over him. It warmed him from the inside out when the clingy Alpha rubbed their wrist glands together before delivering a light nip to them. Katsuki didn’t even hesitate to bite into Eijirou’s own wrist when the other offered it to him, too high and warm on the feeling of his packmate’s happiness to pretend that he wasn’t interested in reaffirming their bond just for the heck of it.
Fucking clingy ass Alphas.
June 28, 2018
He bit back a low groan at the feel of Tsubaki slowly easing herself onto his cock and melted when one of her hands came to press against his abdomen in order to steady herself. He pictured her looking down at him, her dark smile in place as her other hand traveled up to cup and massage her own breast. He imagined her eyes glowing down teasingly at him, drinking in every single one of his reactions from his breathy moans to the slight twitch of his arms from where she had bound them behind his back earlier.
Katsuki let out a satisfied grunt when she seated herself fully, tensing when she squeezed around him tightly.
“My little prince doing okay?” Tsubaki chuckled.
Holy fuck, how desperate he already was to see her giving him that look again. How much he wanted to watch her eyes glow brighter, her dark smirk transform once again into something dangerous and predatory as she rode him slowly to the brink of insanity.
He had felt a bit silly, childish even when he had finally admitted to Tsubaki that he wanted to try blindfolds and some kind of bondage for their first scene. He had been curious, but felt too awkward to ask for anything else just yet.
After listening to her lecture over basic BDSM guidelines, roles and such, he had felt remarkably more confident about it. Uncomfortable with the idea of coming up with his own unique safeword, he elected for a simple red and green as his signals. Then came the seemingly endless list of what he liked, possible things he might be interested in and those he mostly definitely never would be. He had been initially a bit irritated when Tsubaki kept insisting that he didn’t have to push himself to try anything, his pride interpreting it as a stab against his “inexperience.” That is until she quickly explained that there was no such thing as “vanilla” while they were together; everyone had different interpretations of what that could possibly mean and he shouldn’t feel obligated to “prove” anything to her. These sessions were about what he was comfortable with trying and exploring his reactions to the newer or more familiar acts as a sub.
So when he had finally worked up the confidence to tell her he wanted to be bound and have his sight taken while she rode him, he was relieved when Tsubaki eagerly agreed.
There were other nonsexual aspects that he was excited to try, of course. During his own research, Katsuki had been taken aback by just how intrigued he was by the whole power dynamic between a sub and a dom. It was a new concept he had never considered before and the more he looked it into, the more things began to click into place. It wasn’t so much the idea of someone tending to his different sexual desires that really sucked in him, but how such a dynamic could be enacted outside the bedroom as well.
Katsuki wanted to feel ashamed of his fantasies, wanted to feel at least some ounce of self-humiliation for desiring somebody like Tsubaki to dictate his actions, routine or even his attire. He wanted to hate himself for craving something so perverted and for feeding into the shitty stereotypes attributed towards his second gender. He wanted something inside him to stop lighting up with excitement at having the opportunity to just not think for once; to have someone else make decisions for him so he could just disappear for a while.
But he still wanted to try a few more things before admitting any of that to Tsubaki. They had a nice arrangement going so far and while he doubted she would give him shit for it, he was still nervous about voicing what it was he truly wanted.
“You still with me, little prince?” Tsubaki purred above him.
“Yes, Milady” Katsuki choked out.
Heat rose to Katsuki’s cheeks at her playful and sinfully deep chuckle. He twitched again at the sudden feel of fingers gently prodding his mouth, obediently obeying the silent order to suck. His breath hitched when Tsubaki clenched around him again before she began to rise languidly back up his cock. He moaned lowly when she pressed a finger down at the back of his throat and fought the urge to gag before she pulled it back. He whimpered when she moved her fingers to idly pet at his tongue as she sank lower on his once again.
Yeah, he was definitely starting to see why people might enjoy something like this.
July 6, 2018
There was a moment where all Katsuki saw was a torn off arm. A pale, thin wrist that traveled up to a dripping, cut off elbow. Everywhere he looked there was another set of fingers, another set of hands and armless torsos lying all around him. His palm felt wet and he immediately regretted it the moment he turned it over to inspect it.
Red. There was red everywhere. It was all over him. Dripping down his head and coating the fabric of his costume. He took a step and nearly toppled over at the sickening crunch he heard.
“Katsuki! Katsuki! Come on, man!”
The smell. Fucking hell, the smell. Katsuki fought the urge to vomit, swallowing back bile as it began to pour into his lungs and seep into the pores of his skin. It clawed its way down his throat and burnt his insides. It’s choking him.
“Let him go! He’s okay! Everything’s fine!”
He’s choking. There’s no air. Just more of that god awful smell.
“Katsuki, you have to breathe! You’re scaring him! You have to let him go!”
Someone’s crying. More loud snaps and crunches echo in his head as he digs deeper. More red, more bodies. Dig, push, snap! He has to keep going. Someone’s here. They need his help. He needs to get to them. If he doesn’t they’ll be lost forever. The red, the smell. It’s going to get them. It’s going to suffocate them!
“Katsuki, you have to calm down!”
Red dances across his vision, but it’s different now. Brighter, softer. Warm. Someone’s still crying. He doesn’t trust the red. He has to keep them from the red. He has to keep digging. He has to hold onto them. He has to pull them out. Stay away from the red-
A loud gasp and wet series of coughs escaped him. Suddenly, everything was too bright and far too loud. Katsuki winced at the onslaught of noise crashing over him and the overpowering scent of distress and concern in the air. He physically startled when a glance downwards revealed a small boy no older than three held tightly in his arms. He blinked dumbly as the child continued to cry big, seemingly endless tears. He contemplated giving into his inner omega for a moment to attempt calming the child, but felt a firm hand grip his shoulder before he could act on it.
Eijirou sat next to him with a strained grin. They were sitting down on a sidewalk with a small crowd of shocked civilians around them. Katsuki was internally grateful not to see any media or any phones recording whatever had just happened, but even that did very little to ease him entirely. He flinched before calming down again when Eijirou delicately began to lift his arms away from around the small boy.
“That’s it, buddy” Eijirou coaxed.
Whether that statement was meant for him or the toddler, Katsuki had no idea. He watched as though in a daze as Eijirou delicately picked up the distraught toddler and handed him over to his grateful parents.
“Hey, everything’s alright now,” Eijirou cooed. “Ground Zero was really fast wasn’t he! I think you guys actually flew for a bit, yeah! Now, don’t go running around like that anymore, okay? Make you sure to look both ways and hold your parents’ hands.”
Katsuki struggled to stand up and was grateful when his packmate was quick to grip his forearm and guide him away. He felt disoriented, his vision blurring at the edges as his stomach rolled violently. After a while it just became too much and he had to close his eyes. Katsuki felt his body slouch against Eijirou and was unable to respond when the other began to question him about his state.
Everything suddenly came crashing back to him. His patrol route had just so happened to coincide with Shitty Hair’s that day and they had planned to share a lunch together. They had been stopped by some eager fans on their way to grab something to eat when Katsuki had noticed a toddler suddenly rush into traffic after a toy. Eijirou’s back had been turned to the whole thing and Katsuki hadn’t bothered to alert him as to what was happening. One moment he was reluctantly signing an over the top fanboy’s Ground Zero snapback and the next he was flying at top speed to grab the boy out of harm’s way.
But something had clearly gone wrong after he had grabbed the kid. Katsuki struggled to recall what must of have happened a minute, if not a few seconds ago. The driver hadn’t been quick enough to hit their brakes and Katsuki had just barely managed to grab the child out of the way before a horrible accident occurred. So what happened next? Why couldn’t he remember what had happened after that?
He remembered being terrified that he wasn’t going to make it. He remembered pushing his Quirk into overdrive and judging by how much it hurt to clench his fists, he had gone a bit past his limit. For a split second he had made eye contact with the driver, had seen the look of utter terror in their eyes at their inability to stop. He remembered the shaky breath that escaped him when his fingers tightly wrapped around the toddler’s wrist and then-
Blood … there had been blood everywhere.
Without warning, Katsuki began to vomit. When he opened his eyes, it was to see a dirty brick wall in front of him and to the scent of calming pheromones lacing the air around him. Eijirou must have steered them into an alley at some point and away from the crowd. Katsuki gagged on his own distressed scent, finally recognizing it for the smell that he had been choking on earlier. Vomit continued to spew out of him all the while Eijirou rubbed his wrist against Katsuki’s neck glands in attempt to further comfort him. He felt pathetic for the small whimpers that would escape him without his consent and the tears of frustration that flowed down his face.
“Shit! Bakugou, I’m calling your agency. You’re not doing good.”
I’m so sorry! I fucked up! I fucked up!
“It’s gonna be alright. Everything’s gonna be alright.”
It’s all my fault! It’s all my fault!
“You’re gonna be okay, Katsuki.”
It’s all my fault!
“It’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna be okay.”
July 24, 2018
In all honesty, Katsuki knew he should have seen this coming. It was only a matter of time before word finally got to his mentor what he had been doing for the past month. He had never been able to get anything by her before so why did he keep expecting to get away with it? Probably because he had never someone as bull-headed and stubborn as he was until Miruko had first approached him about not accepting her internship offer after his first Sports Festival. He should really know by now that nothing could possibly stand in the way of Miruko and what she wanted without being utterly obliterated in her wake.
And right now she wanted his head mounted in her office for having the utter gall for attempting to pull another fast one on her.
Honestly, he’s just surprised he managed to get away with it for this long. He was sure she would have found out the very second he hadn’t arrived to his appointment last weekend. Then again, four days is still pretty fucking fast for finding out your protege isn’t attending his government mandated counseling sessions. Katsuki makes a mental note to wait a few months before trying something like this again. That should be a reasonable enough time for Miruko to cool off and maybe forget all about this.
Who the fuck is he kidding? Miruko never forgets shit.
“Do you think I’m a fucking idiot!”
And there goes another desk.
Katsuki took in the deep cracks that radiated from his mentor’s fist, mentally sympathizing with the innocent desk for all the damage it just took. He wouldn’t be surprised if Miruko single handedly kept a few carpentry companies alive simply for the sheer amount of damage she inflicted on her own furniture on a near daily basis. Not always out of anger, of course. Miruko’s Quirk can be a bit taxing on any normal sort of equipment even without the extra influence of her natural strength. Miruko was a fucking beast in and out of her uniform and she had never been shy about making that well known to everyone around her. It just so happened to often come at the cost of her office decorations, supplies and furniture …
She should buy sturdier furniture. Or move her office to the agency’s gym.
“Bakugou Katsuki, look at me when I’m talking to you!”
He refused to flinch at the intense expression of irritation on Miruko’s face nor the clear scent of pissed off Alphan pheromones. His inner omega whined at the sheer strength of her presence, but this wasn’t the first time Katsuki’s been called into her office nor would it be the last. He was not going to submit just yet, no matter how much he actually wanted to. It scared him almost just how much he desperately wanted Miruko’s approval of him. It didn’t feel like him to care this much about what others thought about him … at least, not this intensely. Well, he could think of one other person, but they stopped being his mentor once he graduated high school and he wasn’t entirely sure if their opinion of him still held as much weight as it used to. Besides, Miruko was on a whole other level of intensity and Katsuki would like to think that maybe he has grown a little closer to his mentor over the past three years. He would like to hope that Miruko had come to approve of him to some degree; at least, enough to see him as more than just a regular sidekick or worse, a fucking kid.
Who knows where he now stood in her eyes?
“You have a lot of fucking balls pulling this shit, Bakugou,” Miruko began. “What the fuck were you thinking? Did you even think about what you were doing? You’re a fucking adult and a Pro Hero at that for fuck’s sake! You know better than to throw a fucking tantrum every single fucking time something doesn’t go your way!”
“Honestly,” Katsuki replied. “I was just surprised you hadn’t tracked me down the second I didn’t show up.”
“Believe me, I most certainly would have,” Miruko said. “However, there’s a common and practiced policy where your therapist attempts to reach out to you and you are given a window of time to respond back in order to reschedule a missed appointment. I don’t have to get involved unless you go out of your way to be an ass about it.”
“I didn’t ‘go out of my way’ to be asshole-”
“You told him to ‘Eat shit and die’ and then threatened to stab his throat with his pen if he tried calling you again” Miruko cut him off with an Alphan growl.
“Well, that’s his fault for taking things so personally” Katsuki groused.
“Do not fucking start with me.”
He absolutely hated how much influence Miruko’s inner alpha had over him. It was his own damn fault, really. He knew better than to get attached that quickly for fear that his inner omega would accidentally imprint on his mentor. Apparently he and his instincts had no say in the fucking matter because it had only taken two weeks under her tutelage in his second year at U.A. for him to start viewing Usagiyama Rumi as another trusted adult figure in his life. First, Aizawa and now her. He really had nobody but himself to blame for leeching onto an adult who didn’t constantly kiss his ass and wasn’t afraid to call him out on his bullshit. It didn’t help matters that Rumi had a similar personality to his own which was oddly … comforting somehow? Maybe it was just the knowledge that there were other heroes out there who felt and spoke just like him who still managed to power their way up the rankings. It really helped his self-confidence on his rare bad days that’s for sure.
Of course, sharing so many similarities with his mentor didn’t make their fights any easier.
“You know better than to go around threatening civilians!” Miruko shouted, her scent intensifying with her rising irritation. “He filed a complaint against you-”
“Oh, please!” Katsuki scoffed. “The fucker clearly overreacted! He probably just added it alongside his other notes about my millions of fucked up issues as the result of my ‘troubled childhood-’”
“This is serious, Bakugou! I have to attend a meeting with a representative from the Board of Mental Health to vouch for you and convince them you’re not mentally unstable-”
“‘Mentally unstable,’ my ass! Those fuckers have been looking for any reason to pull me out of the field ever since the League kidnapped in me first year!”
“No one is out to get you, Bakugou, and you know it! You ever stop to consider that maybe their keeping an eye on all the newer Heroes? Does it not escape you that your entire class went through repeated trauma, year after year? That maybe there are authorities checking in on your mental health and overall progress just to ensure you can continue what you love doing most? Surely, you are aware that all those monthly check-ups aren’t just to see if your diet needs to be adjusted or if your reflexes are still up to par? You literally have to take a mental assessment immediately once the physical one is over. Did it really escape you that maybe your mental health is just as important as your physical?”
Katsuki struggled to argue back, but was unable to come up with a proper response.
“I have seen too many great heroes fall apart,” Miruko continued. Katsuki tensed at how suddenly soft her tone had become, unsure as to where this was going or how to respond. “I nearly lost my closest friend because of the repeated, overpowering trauma he experienced. He’s just now coming back to the person he was before he took on the assignment that nearly fucked him and his life over forever.”
Katsuki grew uncomfortable under the weight of his mentor’s sorrowful expression. He couldn’t help fidgeting at just how … sad she looked, her mind clearly elsewhere and lost amongst painful memories. It was sort of unspoken rule between them and everyone at the agency; do not bring it up. Everything was still so complicated despite the two years that had passed since Hawks had lost his license and disappeared entirely from the Hero community. Katsuki couldn’t help the bitterness that overtook him when he had accidentally stumbled on Rumi bawling her eyes out during those first few weeks. A small grudge had developed in his heart that day towards the former Number Two Hero and moments like this didn’t exactly endear him to the man, either. Not that he would ever voice that to Rumi, of course. Not when she was still hurting and grieving for someone who was still so precious to her.
“We’re human, Katsuki,” Miruko continued. “We’re human and we’re vulnerable. It’s annoying as shit, but that’s the truth. Just because we have Quirks that can level buildings or part oceans, that doesn’t mean that things can’t get to us. Sometimes the hardest thing you’ll ever face isn’t a villain. Sometimes it’s something far more abstract and personal. There’s nothing wrong with that. You’re not weak or a failure for feeling things, Katsuki.
“Look, I’ll see if I can negotiate for your sessions to be once a week instead of two. It’s honestly way too much for them to expect you to attend that often when it’s been almost eight months now-”
“It doesn’t help me!” Katsuki interrupted. “It just makes things worse, okay! I hate it! Everyone keeps talking about how this shit’s supposed to help you, but it’s doing fuck all for me! That dumbass doesn’t know jackshit about me and like fuck I’m going to spill my guts to some prissy ass dick who has never come close to experiencing the shit I’ve gone through!”
“... I’m really sorry to hear that,” Miruko sincerely replied. “I know therapy isn’t for everyone. If it were up to me, I would pull you out of those sessions right away and have you look into something else that might actually help you. But I can’t. It’s government mandated that all Pro Heroes undergo, at minimum, bi-weekly therapy for the first year after what you experienced. Your case was deemed … special based on what happened and your history. The Board decided that extra measures needed to be taken to accommodate for those factors, but I don’t believe they did that so they could ‘fuck you over.’
“You’re not the only one who’s voiced their hatred for these appointments.Trust me, I had to go through the same thing when … well, you know. These sessions can be really fucking tedious. I know it fucking sucks, but you have to go to them, Bakugou.”
“Yeah, well the government can suck my fucking dick!” Katsuki snarled. “No way am I going back there.You’ll have to drag my dead body back there before I listen to that dipshit drone on about mental repression and whatever the fuck he’s snorting up his ass.”
“You and I both know that dragging you anywhere wouldn’t be a problem for me,” Miruko lightly teased. “But refusal to attend these appointments carries serious consequences. You only get two warnings, Bakugou. You ignored the therapist’s attempts to get through to you so that’s one. This meeting we’re having now, that’s two. If you don’t show up to your next appointment, they will suspend your license for one month. That’s an entire month where you can’t use your Quirk in public, can’t enter the agency and can’t step in to fight off a villain without heavy fines and increased suspension. But you already knew all this, didn’t you, Bakugou?”
Katsuki grinded his teeth together in agitation and forced himself to meet Miruko’s stern stare head on. He hated how strongly his inner omega responded to her light scolding, her small amount of disappointment rattling himself and his instincts into a puddle of embarrassed chastisement. He hated how quickly he had come to value his mentor’s opinion of him, of how utterly grateful he was that she had been willing to give him a second chance after he blew her offer off his first year. He absolutely hated how amazing of a mentor she had turned out to be and that every moment spent under her tutelage genuinely made him feel more powerful and more like a real Pro every single day.
He hated that she didn’t put up with his bullshit. He hated that he respected her for that most of all.
“We both don’t want any of that to happen,” Miruko pressed. “You’re too talented to waste a month pissing around like a dumbass on house arrest when you could be using that time to improving your technique and climbing up the ranks. Or was that whole talk about you ‘willing to take anything I threw at you so long as it helped you become Number One’ a whole bunch of bullshit?”
“No, ma’am” Katsuki answered.
“I’m really sorry, Katsuki,” Miruko sighed. “This is fucked. I didn’t know your sessions had been going that badly.”
“Yeah, well ... I wasn’t exactly open about it, either” Katsuki gruffly admitted.
“Still, I don’t like the fact that it’s making things worse for you. I’ll try looking into some other alternatives and maybe convince the rep to give you some leeway.”
“I’ll survive. Just an idiot with a fucking pen and paper anyway. What the fuck does he know?”
“I meant what I said. It’s not wrong for you to feel vulnerable.”
“Yeah, I heard you.”
August 2, 2018
“I’m not going to use Orders during our scenes anymore.”
Katsuki paused in drying his hair, pulling the towel away from his head and setting it aside. He turned to face where Tsubaki leant against the open door of her bathroom. Her figure was tense despite her attempt at nonchalance and she was unable to hide away the frown she was struggling to get rid of. She didn’t meet his eyes, instead choosing to stare at their reflected forms in the glass of her fogged up mirror. It would have almost looked cute if it weren’t for how serious her tone had just been.
“What?” Katsuki asked.
“I don’t feel comfortable using them,” Tsubaki explained. “I … I don’t like how you disappear.”
“The fuck you on about?” Katsuki scoffed.
He picked the towel back up and rubbed at his still dripping locks with a lot more aggression than he actually felt. Tsubaki chewed at her lip for a bit, her sharp teeth pricking the skin just the slightest as she appeared to gather herself. When she still didn’t elaborate, he gently pushed past her and into the bedroom where a clean set of his clothes had been set out earlier. Katsuki felt a spike of irritation threaten to explode over, but quickly dampered it down. As annoying as it was to wait for Tsubaki to speak up again, he wasn’t going to be an asshole and scream at her to get it over with. It was only fair, really. She had given him plenty of space and never asked questions about his own issues.
It was still annoying.
Only after he had pulled on both his jeans and his T-shirt did Katsuki finally turn to address Tsubaki once more. He couldn’t help narrowing his eyes at just how gray her own pupils looked, no fleck or shimmer of gold to be seen. He almost wished she wouldn’t mask her scent so much just so he could have some idea of what she was thinking.
“Just spit it out” he sighed.
“It doesn’t take a lot to put you into subspace,” Tsubaki slowly said. “Sometimes I just have to give you a look and you’re already there. Other times … you just show up at the door and you’re gone. I don’t know if you’re aware that you’re doing it or how, but it happens a lot.”
“Then just lay down a lighter Order” Katsuki offered.
“No, that’s not it,” Tsubaki shook her head. “Katsuki, sometimes when I try to pull you out of a scene, you will actually fight me. You want to stay there, but you’re extremely vulnerable and you freak out even more than you usually do when you resist my help.”
“Don’t push so hard then” Katsuki replied.
“Will you just listen to me!” Tsubaki suddenly shouted.
Katsuki felt a snarl beginning to rumble in his throat, but fought it down again. He forced himself to take a deep breath and faced Tsubaki. To his surprise, her eyes were still gray and her scent was neutral despite her obvious upset state. Katsuki couldn’t help admiring her control over both her Quirk and her instincts even while she stared down at him with a fuming expression of anger and hurt. He briefly contemplated just what it would take to push her to the point of activating both when she began speaking once more.
“I’m trying to have a conversation with you,” she said. “Could you stop downplaying everything I say for one second?”
“Then go ahead and talk” Katsuki replied, unable to keep his typical sneer from taking over.
“Look, I don’t want to do them anymore so I’m not going to,” Tsubaki said. “End of discussion.”
“You call that a fucking conversation!?” Katsuki snarked. “Thought the whole point of this arrangement was that you and I talked things out, Milady. Isn’t that what you keep harping on about? How we need to discuss everything until there’s a mutual understanding and agreement between both parties. Sound familiar?”
“You’re so fucking frustrating sometimes!” Tsubaki vented. “Are you even capable of having an adult conversation without acting like a fucking child every time something doesn’t go your way!?”
“It’s not that big a deal” Katsuki argued.
“‘Not that big a deal!’” Tsubaki mocked. “Are you shitting me right now!”
“The fuck I am!” Katsuki shouted. “So what if I’m out of it for a bit? What’s so wrong with that? What’s so wrong with me not wanting to get out of subspace right away, huh? Isn’t it your job to make your subs feel good and give them what they want?”
“Fuck you, Katsuki! I’m trying to tell you that I don’t feel comfortable and you’re being such a fucking ass! What the fuck is your problem? Are my personal boundaries not as valid as yours? Where the fuck are you getting this idea that I have to be into everything you’re into, huh? I don’t force you to do anything on that list that I liked even though you clearly didn’t want to even try them! I respect that, Katsuki! I have never once pushed you to do something you didn’t want to do! Not once! What kind of fucking asshole are you to give me shit for wanting to adjust things so both of us have a good time!”
“... I’m sorry.”
“Yeah. I’m sorry,” Katsuki repeated. “I’m being an ass, okay? You’re right.”
For a tense moment neither of them said anything. Katsuki sighed, one of his hand coming up to rub at the frustrated wrinkles in his forehead. He floundered for a bit about what he contemplated doing next. He had never done something like this before for anyone in a long while and he was nervous about attempting to do so again. Taking another deep breath, he pushed himself up from his seat on Tsubaki’s bed and walked over to stand in front of her. His frown turned into a teasing smirk as her eyes widened in surprise at the small waves of comforting pheromones he sent over them both. He surprised even himself with how tenderly he kissed her before backing off again.
“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like shit.”
“Yeah, well,” Tsubaki stumbled to respond. “Fuck. What makes you think you can be so smooth out of nowhere? I want to stay mad at you, asshole.”
“Natural born talent” Katsuki smirked.
“Fuck you!” Tsubaki laughed. Katsuki chuckled when she went to wrap her arms around his neck and pulled him in for another quick kiss. “You’re such a fucking insufferable bastard, you know that?”
“You’re the one who approached me all desperate to fuck me” Katsuki countered.
“I was not desperate,” Tsubaki snorted, flecks of gold beginning to shimmer once again in her eyes. “You were practically tripping over yourself the moment I sat down.”
“Cocky piece of shit, too.”
“Oh, yeah? This coming from the bad boy who could hardly stand when I-”
Katsuki’s grin deepened at Tsubaki’s laughter, his scent taking on a notably warmer tone without his awareness. A small well of contentment settled inside him despite his disappointment. He wasn’t going to push his lover about it, but the craving to be controlled sparked dangerously in his gut at the realization his instincts wouldn’t be influenced by an Order any longer. There had been something just so enticingly perfect about handing over his inner omega to her command alongside his own whenever she dommed him. But as much as he was going to miss that aspect of their scenes and relationship, he wasn’t willing to trample over whatever this was they had just because one of his darker preferences wasn’t being met.
Not after it took him so long to finally find what he had been looking for since the day Hansuke dumped him.
August 11, 2018
“THE F-FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR!?” Katsuki spluttered.
Katsuki’s eyes narrowed at Eijirou’s blush and how quickly his best friend flipped his hood up in attempt to hide. A growl rumbled in his chest when the other went to hide his face in his hands, too, as though ashamed of himself. He quickly pulled the hood back down, ignoring Eijirou’s embarrassed gasp when black locks erupted into his vision. Neither of them said a single word for a while, Eijirou too flustered to make an attempt and Katsuki too dumbfounded to comprehend anything other than what he was seeing.
“What the fuck, Ei?” Katsuki finally said.
“I, uh,” Eijirou fumbled. “I thought maybe it was time for a change and-”
“Why the fuck would you think that!” Katsuki shouted.
“Um, I’ve been thinking about it for a while actually,” Eijirou confessed. “The red was nice and all, but I, dunno. I, uh, just thought maybe it would look better like it was before and all ...”
“Who did it?” Katsuki asked, his tone sharp and threatening.
“... I dyed it?” Eijirou replied.
“No, dumbass!” Katsuki snarled. “Who’s been fucking with you!”
“Tell me what happened and who I need to kill, Ei! I’ll make those fuckers regret ever messing with you! I’ll make them choke on hair dye until their blood turns black-”
“WHOA! Whoa, man!” Eijirou interrupted. “Don’t kill anybody, Bakugou! It’s not like that!”
“Like fuck it isn’t!” Katsuki roared. “The last time you dyed your hair black was when Amakiji nearly died after taking that hit for you and those fuckwits started saying shit about how it should have been you! You better tell me who’s fucking with you, Ei, or I swear to fucking All Might I’m going to-”
“It’s not like that, okay!” Eijirou shouted. “Look, I just thought … I thought it would help you feel better.”
“... explain” Katsuki demanded.
“Please don’t take this the wrong way, man,” Eijirou sighed. “I’m not looking down on you or trying to coddle you, I promise. I still think you’re the manliest guy I’ve ever met. I just … you kinda scared me a little bit last time with that kid.
“You kept saying something about protecting him from ‘the red’ and hardly anything I did seemed to be helping you. I couldn’t stop thinking that maybe if my hair wasn’t like that, then maybe you would have calmed down quicker. Or maybe I just fucked up everything from the start and I kept making things worse for you whenever I got too close to you.”
Katsuki flinched at the onslaught of sad pheromones his packmate started emitting. His inner omega went into a panic when tears actually began to fall down Eijirou’s face and yet all he could do was stare in bewilderment at his best friend’s emotional outburst. Desperate to fix things, he drowned the area around them in his own scent. He winced as the air suddenly became thick with pure Omegan pheromones and felt his skin flush hot in embarrassment. It wasn’t often that he exuded his scent out, preferring to keep it to his own space or suppressing it with neutralizing scent blockers while out on patrol. Naturally, when he did choose to use his scent, he couldn’t help flooding the entire surrounding area around him despite his best efforts.
What made it worse was that Eijirou had dyed his hair because Katsuki couldn’t keep his fucking shit together. Fuck. He felt sick to his stomach the longer he thought about it. His internal struggle must have shown because once again he was enveloped in a tight hug. A small whimper escaped him at the intensity of Eijirou’s calming scent.
I can’t even comfort my only friend properly. What the fuck is wrong with me? I can’t even do this right!
“Please stop being so mean to yourself,” Eijirou said. “I know that you think you’re a screw up or that you’re not a good friend, but that’s not true, Katsuki. You gotta listen to me. It’s not your fault, okay? None of this is your fault. I’m sorry I made you so upset. I should of talked to you first before doing something like this.”
All I ever do is make Eijirou take care of me. What the fuck have I ever done for him other than use him to feel better?
“I hate seeing you hurt,” Eijirou continued. “I wanted to make things better, you know? But, yeah. Should of thought about what it would have looked like to you before dying my hair.”
“You shouldn’t have changed it because of me,” Katsuki mumbled. “I can take care of myself.”
“I know, I know,” Eijirou replied, tucking his nose into the blonde Omega’s glands. Katsuki waited as his packmate took a deep breath of his scent in an attempt to collect himself. “I didn’t do it because I thought you couldn’t handle it. I just wanted to make things easier for you. It’s just hair anyway.”
“But it’s not ‘just hair.’ That shit means something to you and … I wish you hadn’t done it because of me.”
“Don’t fucking apologize. Stupid mushy ass Alpha.”
Katsuki let out a long sigh. Their scents were still thick in the air and seemed to have intermingled at some point while they were talking. He took a deep breath and allowed his inner omega to bask in Eijirou’s scent in an attempt to center himself once more. He would of taken sniff at the other’s glands, too, but he had a feeling he would probably get too light headed to stand if he did that. He rarely ever let anyone this close to him, let alone allowed their scents to entwine with his own. Katsuki was admittedly extremely territorial about his personal space and hated it when others got too close. In rare moments like this when he let himself be vulnerable to Eijirou’s inner alpha, it was all but guaranteed his own instincts would become overwhelmed for a while.
“... I kinda like it now, though” Eijirou softly spoke up.
“Fuck me,” Katsuki groaned. “Why did I get the dumbass Alpha for a packmate?”
“Hey!” Eijirou laughed. “I’m being for real here! It was weird, sure, but I haven’t had it like this in years and it looks really good!”
“You’re so stupid” Katsuki chuckled.
“You think it looks good, too, right?” Eijirou asked, unable to completely hide the small bit of nervousness he felt.
“You look good” Katsuki gently smiled.
August 21, 2018
A framed photograph of a tall teenager with black hair pulled into a tight ponytail smiled back at him. Katsuki grimaced as the leftover smoke of the burnt incense sticks continued to swirl in the air. The headstone was still wet from being washed, further cementing the fact that someone had been here eerily not to long ago. He gnawed at his lip for a bit as he contemplated his own box of incense sticks currently in his jacket pocket for a moment longer before finally pulling it out. His fingers shook slightly, betraying his nervousness as he set about lighting the stick and then placing it amongst the others.
He paused for a moment before lifting his head to finally read the name engraved into the headstone.
August 21, 2005-November 1, 2017
Katsuki closed his eyes, willing his scent to not give away the torrent of emotions he was experiencing. A part of him wanted to say something, anything. The decision to come here had been a spur of the moment and thus, he hadn’t fully prepared himself for what exactly it was he was going to be facing. What the fuck were you supposed to say in situations like this? Surely a “Happy Birthday” to a dead person wasn’t entirely appropriate. There’s no way “I’m sorry” was ever going to cut it, either. Katsuki still had no fucking idea why he had been so desperate to discover the identities of the two people he had failed the most, let alone their fucking birthdays. That had be really creepy, right? No sane person did shit like that.
So why had it felt so important that he do so? Why did he need to be here right now in front of the grave that shouldn’t be here to begin with? Why was he fucking himself up like this?
“You should be here,” Katsuki heard himself say. He paused for a moment. “Your brother Kotaro’s doing, uh, pretty good. Got adopted by one of your aunts from what I heard. I mean, fuck, he’s obviously missing you and everything.”
I’m talking to dead people now? The fuck’s wrong with me.
“Yeah, so …” Katsuki struggled. “I just … look, you should be here and it’s my fault you’re not. Me saying ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t going to change anything. You’re still going to be dead and I’m … I’m gonna be here.”
Katsuki quickly wiped away a tear, no longer able to meet Nobuya’s frozen smiling gaze. He lit another stick and made a quick prayer before speed walking as fast as he could out of the cemetery. He wrinkled his nose as the scent of incense clung to him, almost as though it was chasing him while he fled. He wished he had never bothered doing any of this in the first place.
I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.
I have returned! Apologies for the long wait! I'm kinda laughing at myself because I've had to create a massive ass timeline alongside my notes for this series. It's basically turning into a fucking mystery novel at this point, what with all the extensive research and note-taking I've been doing.
Anyway, here's the dealio with the edits. Let's discuss dates and the timeline. I had to revisit the dates multiple times for the previous chapters and kept getting myself so horribly confused. So in order to make it coherent again (at least for me), I decided to use actual months/days/years. I edited the previous chapters, but I'll state it here as well: the current time is early April, 2022.
Here's my reasoning for the year 2022.
The manga was originally published in in 2014 and Izuku and Katsuki were 15 when they entered U.A. In the current chapters, Katsuki is now 16. So, I've made 2014 my reference for events and character ages. Based on this timeline and the plot I have going, I’ve decided that Katsuki is 23 in present time.
Does that make sense? Fuck, I hope it does.
Apologies once again to those who don't like BakugouxOC sex scenes, etc. I promise they are there for a reason. Hopefully, their presence in these scenes doesn't pull you out of the story D:
(I'm really sorry if they do)
Also! I know I've been really weird with the chapter summaries, but I've finally settled on a format thing! So if you want to take a look at those, have fun! >:D
Oh and if you're interested/curious, I actually created a playlist for this fic. It's just a small collection of songs and music I listen to when I need inspiration. I've never actually done that before, but I'm very proud of what I've gotten together. (And, yes, the songs and placement do have hints in them as to where this fic is going).
Here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUDT-E2B8M1f6fNNKWPFo03RgqGGOOq9E
Anyway, welcome back to Angst City! >:3