Chapter 1: UNO
Remember those “innocent” card games you would play with your family? You know, the ones that ended in some kind of anger induced table flip. No? Well then you need to try it just once.
As the seven members of the RFA had concluded their late night meeting, Zack found a deck of Uno cards in Seven’s jacket. They were crisp and never had been opened, it was clear that Seven had intended something out of this. The members all got up, stretching their muscles and yawning as they noted the late time. Seven, however, stayed seated. He eyed Zack and then the jacket and back at Zack again. That devilish smile told him everything he needed to know.
“H-hey…” Zack cleared his throat. “Does anyone want to-“
“I do!” Seven shot up and snatched the cards out of Zack’s hand. “Oh wow! Did you just buy these Zoozy? Hmm hmm~ looks like someone loves the old school family fun games!”
Zack sighed. “Erm… yeah.”
Jaehee looked back. “We’re getting ready to leave.”
“W-well yeah but-“
“Zachary, it’s late. Unlike some people here,” Jumin glanced at ZEN, it did not go unnoticed, “I have extremely important matters to attend to.”
“Unlike some people here!” ZEN gritted his teeth, “I need my beauty sleep for I have an important modeling gig tomorrow!”
Yoosung smiled. “There’s a LOLOL match happening with a rare drop so…”
Seven seemed to have prepared for this. “Aww well I guess V, Zack, and I will have to play alone.”
“Oh?” V chuckled. “I guess I’m being volunteered in this.”
“And I understand why you wouldn’t want to play, YS,” Seven draped his arm over the naive blond, “V’s really good at this game. You’d lose for sure.”
Yoosung smiled broadly as his eye twitched. “Let’s play!”
“Let’s make this interesting!” Seven placed a box on the table. “Inside this present here, is the grand prize to the winner of three games.” He held up three fingers. “Whoever can accumulate three wins gets the prize.”
“What’s in it?” Jumin stepped forward.
The conniving hacker smirked. “Well, it’s a surprise. But take it from me, it’s valuable and heavy, and no, I didn’t make it or invent it or anything. The only thing I did was obtain it and wrap it. What I will say, is that this item is a collectors item of a certain something. So even if you don’t like the item, it’ll sell for massive bucks. Or,” he looked over at Jumin, “it will surely gain the favor of a certain investor-shut-in.”
Now this peaked Jumin’s interest. “I see, so I can take this as confirmation that you do read my private emails. Even though I told you time and time again not to.”
“Details, details.” Seven waved him off. “Soooo?”
ZEN put his arm around Zack, “Oh, you kids play your silly games. The prince and I are going to get our beauty sleep.”
Jumin undid his necktie. “Running away coward?”
“WHAT!? OKAY! IT’S ON!!”
“Ow Hyun…” Zack sighed as he plopped down next to V and Seven. Jaehee was forced to play as Jumin concluded having her on his side would give him a 20% better chance in getting the prize for the company.
V smiled wearily as the cards were passed out. He leaned over to Zack, “Are you a part of this?”
“No…” Zack smiled. “Just… when Luciel gives me that look, I can’t say no.”
V chuckled. “He sure has you by the strings.”
“Okay!!! Let’s get this started!” Seven chuckled. The table went: Jumin, Yoosung, Jaehee, Seven, Zack, V, ZEN, then back to Jumin.
Zack looked at his cards and frowned. This…was going to be brutal.
~* Game 1 *~
“Reverse!” Yoosung slammed the card down.
“Reverse again!? Are you kidding me!?” ZEN rolled his eyes. “How many of those damn things do you have on you? You do realize you’re just giving this round to Jumin, right? Who’s side are you on!?”
“Yoosung understands my value.” Jumin said simply. “As thank you Yoosung, for giving me this win-“
“Shut up…” Yoosung leaned back.
“-I will give you a raise when you join my company.”
Jaehee rubbed her eyes. “Sir…”
“Wait, seriously? You mean it?”
V hid his laughter behind his hand.
Jumin nodded before placing his card down. “Draw four, and the color is blue, uno.”
Seven laughed as ZEN pounded his fist to the table before putting down his cards. “I hate this game.” He took his cards.
The first game went to Jumin.
~* Game 2 *~
“Revenge!!” ZEN threw down his draw 2 atop of Seven’s, Zack’s, and V’s,. “That’s eight cards trust-fund jerk!”
“Unlike you, I can count.”
“That was one round!!!”
“This is brutal.” Zack laughed.
Seven was grinning as he thumbed his cards. To Zack it didn’t really seem like he was actually playing, more like observing. Their eyes met. Seven smiled brightly. Ah, I get it. Zack smiled back.
“Mr. Han, I don’t like that smile.”
“All in due time Assistant Kang.”
Yoosung shuddered. “Th-the room suddenly got colder.” He placed down his card followed by Seven then Zack.
V placed down his card. “Uno.”
“WHAT!? Since when!?” Yoosung slammed his cards down.
“Since forever.” Zack laughed. “But you were on Jumin’s di-“
“Zachary.” Jumin spoke lowly. He wasn’t totally into the crassness.
“-ck for so long that you didn’t notice.”
“What? I wasn’t on!” Yoosung blushed. “I wasn’t!”
“You kinda are.” ZEN laughed.
“What?! No I’m not!”
“There is soooo much fan fiction of you and Jumin.” Seven showed him his AO3 account.
Jaehee leaned forward. “Luciel… why are all these by you?”
“Wh-wh-what~? Nooo~ reason~”
“Stop shipping us!” Yoosung pleaded.
“I… am happy that I can’t see that.” V mumbled.
“Oh you can’t? Lemme read one!” Seven chuckled. “It was just a regular day at C&R when-“
“I see that E rating Seven.”
“EW EW EW!!!”
“Luciel, do you want to die?”
“Resume the game Luciel.” Jumin spoke seriously.
The game went to V.
~* Game 8 *~
Jumin | 2 - ZEN | 1 - Jaehee | 2 - Yoosung | 1 - V | 1 - Luciel | 0 - Zack | 0
“Zachary, I don’t appreciate you stacking the cards so much.” They had decided to shake up the seating arrangement. Now it went: Yoosung, Zack, Jumin, Seven, Jaehee, ZEN, V, and back to Yoosung.
“Sorry, but I have to protect myself you know.”
“You were the one who brought up the playing. Are you and Luciel planning another prank on me?” Jumin side-eyed Zack.
“Memes!” Seven called out.
“Really Jumin, I’m not. I just wanted to play too is all.”
“It’s 1 in the morning.” V pointed out.
“I want that box! Money! Give the poor college kid money!”
“Investments, Yoosung, is what all of this boils down to. Thus, I should be the one to win.”
“This game will last for ages Luciel. Mr. Han, shouldn’t we be getting home now? You have a meeting-“
“Assistant Kang, this game is important.”
“Thank god it’s not monopoly.” ZEN muttered.
“Oh!” Seven perked up.
“NO!” All five, excluding Jumin, yelled.
“NO NO NO!!!” They yelled again.
“I would rather keep you all as friends.” V sighed. “Seven, please stop skipping everybody.”
“I can’t help it~!”
“These cards aren’t rigged are they?” Yoosung held his up to the light. Everybody else followed suit.
“Aww, guys, you don’t trust me?”
“No.” Unanimous vote.
“I’m so tired.” Jaehee mumbled.
“We need only one more win.” Jumin’s eyes were intense. “Keep going.”
Zack yawned. He looked over as Seven was hunched over or his lap. “Luciel! What did I say about the Dr. Pepper!?”
Seven jumped. “Ah…ha… that I can’t have anymore?”
“Then what’s in your hand?”
Zack glared. “I said you could only have water today. You drank four cans yesterday!”
“Geez, have we all been trained by the newbie?” ZEN laughed as his fingers twitched for a cigarette (Zack had scolded him earlier).
“Yes.” Unanimous vote.
Game goes to Zack.
~* Game 13 *~
Jumin | 2 - ZEN | 2 - Jaehee | 2 - Yoosung | 2 - V | 2 - Luciel | 1 - Zack | 2
“Kill me. Just kill me now!” Yoosung cried. “Wh-what time is it!?”
“Fi…five in the morning.” ZEN yawned. “God… but I’m so close.”
Jumin slowly lowered his cup of coffee. “Give up now. I’m going to win.”
Zack snored softly as he held his cards against his chest. Yoosung leaned against him as the two shared a blanket. Seven nudged the college blond with his foot. “Your turn!”
“Huh? Wha? Ugh… how are you still so chipper?”
“This is nothing to me.”
Yoosung threw down a card.
Zack barely opened his eyes. “I… I fold.”
“What!?” Seven shot up. “Why?!”
“I’m so tired.” He rolled out of his chair and crawled to the couch. V was already asleep in his own chair.
“Actually yeah,” ZEN stood up and stretched. “Let’s just finish this next time.”
“Agreed.” Jaehee stood up with a wobble.
“I shall have Driver Kim take us all home.”
“Wow," ZEN yawned, "for once you’re nice.”
Yoosung softly shook V awake and before long the room was empty except for Seven and Zack.
“Tsk.” Seven sat down.
Zack yawned before walking over to him. “Why are you so upset? We said we’ll play next time.”
Seven sighed. He looked up at Zack wearily and rested his head in his arms. “I know… this was a stupid idea.”
“Why were you so adamant on all this?”
“Because… because I’ve only played cards once with someone very close to me. He was so excited when I snuck them in and… god I dunno. I saw this game when I was going through someone’s facebook. It was some compilation of kids playing Uno and… I just missed that.”
“You… haven’t played with anyone since?” Zack placed a hand on Seven’s shoulder.
He shook his head. “The last time we played was the first time we played. When…” He froze up. “When my mother… got home… I-I burned the cards quickly. I promised that we would play again but it never happened.”
Zack pulled him in for a hug. He didn’t know what to say but he couldn’t just sit there watching as Seven started shaking so brutally.
“I’m a stupid child, I get it.”
“You’re not.” Zack hushed the demons. “Not at all. It was really fun, I was having a blast. This time, I promise, we’ll play again. And if not all of us can make it then I’ll most definitely play a game with you. Got it?”
“And there is online Uno, so we can all connect there.”
Seven perked up. “You think?!”
“Yeah.” Zack smiled. “We’ll play again. And we’ll laugh again. Cuz the RFA is a family, right?”
Seven smiled, though it looked painful, “Yeah.”
Chapter 2: Jumin, Zen, and Legos
Inspired by an insult starter found on Tumblr. Spoilers for Seven and Unknown’s real names
It was supposed to be a friendly team work exercise. But that's asking too much when Jumin and Zen are grouped together. “Yeah hey, Jumin, you’re being about as useful as an expired coupon."
"It’s as I thought, Hyun, you’re dumber than a pole.”
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Spoilers for Seven and Unknown’s real names
It was quite the sight to see. Jumin and Zen working together on a group activity that involved Legos and a manual. It was V’s brilliant idea to volunteer the RFA in the Annual Charity Extravaganza. Other Charity and Fundraising groups would gather and mingle, share their accomplishments, and plan future events. This was the first year that the RFA was joining this party and, at the time, it seemed like a brilliant idea.
Truthfully it wasn’t just V’s idea, it was also mine as the new coordinator. Okay…mainly it was my idea. I would be taking credit if it weren’t for Dumb and Dumber. Normally at our parties they were decent human beings mainly because they had something to keep them occupied, and it started that way believe me. Then came the ‘games’. The damn… games…
We divided into two groups. Group A was Jaehee, V, Yoosung and myself. Group B was the Choi twins, Jumin, and Zen. It was like a disaster waiting to happen. Why did I let that happen? Oh right, because I thought they were grown adults. And somehow the two biggest children in the room wasn’t the twins but Jumin and Zen. Isn’t Jumin a respected CEO and Zen a respected actor, you ask? No. I’ll tell you what they actually are, idiotic children.
The task was to have two people putting together Legos while the other two read the instructions. The catch was that in the pile of Legos were two different sets and you had to make both of them. For example, in our pile we had two different types of Star Wars Legos. Jaehee and I decided we would give the orders while Yoosung and V put everything together. My manual was for the Death Star while Jaehee’s was for the Millennium Falcon. Hard and challenging but ultimately fun. With Jaehee on my side things were going so smooth it was like butter and we were killing it. Then… I looked over at our other members.
I don’t know what exactly they were supposed to be making but my guess was chaos.
Zen leaned back and glared. “Yeah hey, Jumin, you’re being about as useful as an expired coupon. What. B. Part?”
“As I said, put part B into part A.”
“WHAT. B. PART!?”
“Part B into part A.”
“ARGH! Next step!”
“Ach-shually,” Saeyoung pushed up his glasses, “I think we need that part.”
“Stop.” Saeran mumbled. “Stop stirring the pot.”
“No I’m serious. That blue piece looks like the one we need.”
“No.” Jumin showed him his manual. “This looks like the one we need.”
“Oh really Jumin?” Zen snatched the manual. “Show me. Show me where we need it.”
“See this? Part. B.” Jumin raised the blue rectangle. “It goes here into Part. A.” He made sure to enunciate all of that as he pressed it into some random piece. It did not fit.
“You were just comprised to fail weren’t you!?”
“Fail? I own a company.”
“And yet you can’t put together a children’s toy.”
“I would be able to if my partner wasn’t so incompetent.” Jumin tossed the piece behind him. Saeyoung ran after it.
Zen gripped the manual as he forced a smile. “And this is why nobody likes you. You can’t admit when you’re wrong!”
“I wasn’t wrong. I was mistaken.”
“What’s the difference!?”
Saeran quietly pushed his pieces further from the two. Jumin leaned against the table. “Look, would you like me to say I’m sorry?”
“Yes. Finally some human decency.” Zen smiled eagerly.
Jumin slightly narrowed his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry that I’m better than you in every way.”
“…” Zen’s face went blank as if he was processing what he just heard.
Zen was foolish to think it’d be sincere. I was foolish to think that’d be it.
“Did you not hear me?” Jumin tilted his head, the look of triumph was obvious. “Why am I even asking, of course you didn’t. If you did we would’ve been done by now.”
“Please shut up. Shut – stop talking. I’m ready to kill you.”
Saeran quietly fished through the pieces as his brother was on his hands and knees still looking for that singular piece. Jumin kept talking. “You’re only mad because you’re too incompetent to read a manual and too incompetent to take orders.”
Zen clicked his tongue and waved his index finger. “No – mmm – I swear Jumin.”
“Really? You think you can do it by yourself?” Jumin took a step back. “Then go ahead.”
“You’re making me do it all by myself?”
“What? You can’t? It’s as I thought, you’re dumber than a pole.”
“Okay bitch. Okay. Okay.” Zen slammed the manual on the table and grabbed some pieces. “I’ll show you who’s dumber than a pole.” He started connecting pieces not checking if they were even his. Saeran was already at the bar while Saeyoung was under someone’s table. Zen quickly put together some sort of tower and stepped back. “Here! A big middle finger to you!”
“How classy.” Jumin sighed and shook his head. “I should’ve known. Instead of proving me wrong, you just continued to confirm that you are indeed an idiot. Only children act this petty.”
“Okay, you’re about to catch these hands.” Zen rolled up his sleeves.
“Alright!” I stepped in. “Zen! Go over there! And Jumin you go over there!” I pointed to two corners of the room. “It’s time for a time out.”
Zen looked taken aback. “You’re not serious-“
I slowly turned towards him. “Did I fucking stutter Zen?”
“If you’ll excuse me.” He awkwardly bowed before going to his corner.
“Coordinator this is-“
“Jumin,” I narrowed my eyes “I have keys to your penthouse and Saeyoung is in the room with me. I can give him access to Elizabeth. Do you really want that?”
“… I will be in my corner if anyone needs me.”
I snapped my fingers. “Rest of the RFA let’s finish this bitch. Saeyoung stop sticking your ass in the air and get the hell over here!”
The red head crawled out from the table holding a blue piece. Saeran casually walked back and handed Jaehee his manual. “Are we going to finish this shit or what?”
Jaehee sighed and nodded as she ran her fingers through her hair. “Then we’re all going to the bar and forgetting this ever happened.”
Saeran raised his drink. “Way ahead of you.”
Needless to say, we were never invited to the even ever again.
You can find me on tumblr too! zackandghostie Hope to see you there!
Chapter 3: Mystic Messenger Area 51 AU
This is going to be dated in a few months
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Yoosung★: This is it! The promised day!
707: Soon we will have our answers!
707: And soon I will be granted my very own spaceship!
MC: Soon we can marry in space!
707: I can’t wait!
Zack: Wait! What the fuck?
707: (((( ;°Д°))))
Jumin Han: Who is that?
Zack: What? You guys don’t remember me??
Zack: That’s harsh considering I’m coordinating your party!
MC: What? No! I’m the coordinator
Jaehee Kang: Wait. What is going on?
Zack: I’m not an intruder! I’m your friend! Zachary Rein!
707: Never heard of you.
MC: Wait! guys…
Zack: Never heard of me!? Excuse me but I have solved a lot of your guys’ problems!
Jumin Han: Seven, get rid of this strange man.
Zack: I was a pet sitter for Elly!
707: (((( ;°Д°))))
707: He knows Elly!?
Jumin Han: Elizabeth the 3rd
Jumin Han: And no, I’ve never seen you before.
Jumin Han: And I am not merciful to intruders.
Zack: I know your real named Seven! It starts with an S and ends with a G
707: Okay haha;;;
707: Now I’m getting worried.
Yoosung★: What is going on!?
ZEN: Has Seven been compromised!?
MC: YOU GUYS!
Jumin Han: Yes, what is it?
MC: How weird is that we,
MC: who are planning to raid Area 51,
MC: are suddenly compromised??
MC: It’s only one of two things!
MC: Government Spy! Or a
Zack: What? No! I’m not an alien.
Zack: Although… now that you mention it….
Zack: I was sitting in my apartment when suddenly the world got all red randomly.
Zack: I’m looking around and… this is definitely not my room.
Jumin Han: Are you breaking into someone’s house right now?
Yoosung★: What the heck!? What is going on!?
707: There is only one thing
MC: I agree
Jaehee Kang: I doubt that;;;
ZEN: It’s like they were made for each other;;;
Jumin Han: It’s more likely that we are dealing with a strange criminal.
Zack: Well I am escaping through a window right now.
ZEN: Oh my god…
Zack: But my god, you’re right.
Zack: Not only was I abducted.
Zack: I was sent to another dimension!!
MC: That is the only explanation!
Yoosung★: The government is on to us!
Jumin Han: I must have been abducted too
Jumin Han: And transported to a world of absurdities
Zack: There is only one way for me to go back to my dimension.
707: Yes, the plan still stands. We must raid Area 51
MC: That way poor Zack here can go home!
707: Let’s go!
Midnight September whatever the fuck. It’s only a few hours before the group hits Lincoln County, Nevada. The plan was set. Get inside Area 51 and send this Zack fellow back to his dimension.
“So who even are you Zack?” MC smiled as she handed him a shot.
“I’m you but with more angst and a penis.”
It was here, it was almost here. The day the rumor came out. Does Jumin Han- Oh wait dead meme. What is hiding inside Area 51? What was the government hiding?!?
Seven pressed his ear to the ground. “I can hear it.”
“Hear what?” Yoosung followed suit.
“The secrets. It’s saying… hmmm… ah! Yoosung… Yoosung!”
“W-What! What is it saying!?”
“Don’t drink the… don’t drink chocolate milk…”
Yoosung frowned and stood up. “Don’t remind me…”
Zack stared up at the stars. “We’re here early the sun hasn't even started to rise. Those other raiders haven’t shown up yet.”
MC shook her head. “No. Now that you’re here our mission has slightly changed. If they learned that you were a dimension hopper you’d be dead faster before you could say Dattebayo! But with all of us by your side it won’t be a problem.”
“It’s true Zack! I’ve been practicing my Naruto run for a week!” Yoosung smiled. “I won’t drag us down!”
“Thanks guys, I feel like I’m in safe hands. Mainly because Jaehee is here and out of all of us she is the only one who can kick ass.”
Jaehee pushed up her glasses. “It seems your Jaehee in your world also has a PHD in ass kicking.”
“That she does.”
“Does that mean there is another ZEN like me who is just as handsome?”
Zack tilted his head. “Yeah pretty much. He’s just as narcissistic too. But we love him anyways.”
“We?” Jumin looked over. “I doubt the Jumin in your world is so foolish.”
“Okay, most of us love him. Everybody except Jumin loves him.”
“That makes more sense.” Jumin nodded.
“It’s sad to know that there are two insufferable trust fund jerks in this universe.” Zen pity cried.
MC raised her phone and frowned. “V hasn’t joined the chat yet. Does he even know we’ve left Korea? Oh well… He wouldn’t be able to see any of this anyways.” She put her phone away. “That’s enough talk about dimensions. Our focus is Aliens.”
“Right.” Seven nodded. “Now let’s stick with the plan. There are only eight of us but if well all Naruto run it shouldn’t be a problem.”
“Where are we Naruto running too?” Yoosung started his ninja stretches.
Seven clicked his tongue. “Oh my sweet Yoosung. It’s obvious. It’s in that general direction.” He pointed left.
Jaehee held up her clipboard. “It’s true, I was doing my research, and the lab is indeed over there.”
“What is your source Assistant Kang?”
“The greatest source of all. The tumblr blog zackandghostie.”
“Zack and Ghostie?”
“Yes but all one word and all lowercase.”
“Wow. I should check out that blog.” MC smiled. “It seems like I can get all my mystic-al information there. I should message them. I should send them a mystic message.”
“Don’t bother.” Jaehee protected her dear friend. “It is poorly run; you won’t get much out of it.”
“Anyways,” Seven grinned, “enough chatter. Let’s go!”
Jumin nodded. “Does everyone have their weapons?”
Seven raised his tinfoil sword. Yoosung held up his tin foil ball. Jaehee put on her tinfoil body armor. Jumin had his tinfoil brass knuckles. Finally, Zen had his tinfoil covered hammer.
“Wait!” Zack halted the group. “What if they can still shoot all of us? MC and I should go first.”
“What? Why?” Zen said.
MC nodded in agreement. “Isn’t it obvious? Zack and I have plot armor. If anyone can break into the compound, it’s us. We’ll text you when it’s safe.”
“Good idea!” Seven grinned.
“Let’s go MC.”
Faster than the wind MC and Zack Naruto ran through the empty dessert or whatever it looks like over there. They were so fast not even the most trained eye could see them. It was indeed the power of anime and plot armor that protected them. As they ran left, they noticed something very odd. There was a strange metal hatch nearly obscured by a cactus and a pile of rocks. The two skidded to a halt and nodded at each other.
“This is it. It has to be.”
MC pulled the hatch and sighed. “Locked. But luckily we have God Seven on our side.” She texted him.
Two minutes later, they were blessed by the presence of god. “I see. This is no ordinary lock, but then I’m no ordinary man.” He grinned and pushed up his glasses. He protruded a USB from his hoodie pocket and plugged it into a laptop he had been carrying. He plugged the other end into his cell phone and began dancing his fingers over the keys. He was a gifted hacker. “This will take a second. I’m hacking into the mainframe.”
Zack rubbed his head. “Of…what exactly?”
“The hatch door. I’m giving us all access to the compound.”
“Well alright then.”
MC smiled. “He can do anything.”
“Except eat healthy.” Her eye twitched.
Luckily, before they got into it, there was a clicking noise. “We’re in.”
“Amazing.” Zack nodded as he pulled open the door. “Whoa…it’s freezing in there.”
“The walls are so white. And look! The floors are all covered in chrome!”
Seven fell to the floor and did a weird sit up. “Fuuuttuuree!” He was giddy. “I’m so excited! I’ll get the others here!”
“We’re already here.” Jumin walked up. “I was getting tired of waiting.” He knelt down and looked down the hatch. “This is amazing technology. It’s more advanced than I’ve ever seen.”
“I know.” Zen added. “It reminds me of when I played the flawless android in a SCIFI special.”
“I remember that.” Jaehee nodded. “It was beautiful.”
“Well,” Zack grabbed the handles of the ladder, “we aren’t going to learn anything if we stand around forever.” He began his decent; MC followed him.
The inside of the compound was something out of this world. Everything was blindingly white and there were strange green lights glistening along the walls. It truly was something out of a SCIFI movie. Being in here confirmed everything.
“It’s oddly quiet.” Zack murmured.
MC looked around. “Maybe they put all their forces into stopping the raid? We did come here early.”
“Maybe. If so that means we’re pretty lucky.”
Yoosung looked around and held his hands together tightly. “I’m a little worried. What if aliens work here? What if they dissect us?”
“I’m sure they don’t need someone who just plays video games all day.” Jaeehee said bluntly. “We should still be careful though. We don’t know what we’re facing against. Mr. Han please stay alert.”
“Of course.” He touched the walls. “How odd, this area is freezing but the walls are hot.” Everyone touched it. “And these lights, there is something odd about them. MC please do not touch anything. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“Too late.” She said. “But thanks for your concern.”
“He’s right though.” Seven stuck his finger in the light. “It feels… slimy.”
“…Mmm…” Zack thought for a moment. “Nngh this better not turn into a tentacle hentai.”
“Tentacle…hentai?” Jumin inquired. “What does that mean?”
“L-let’s not. Just uh… put on safe search the next time you look it up.”
“I’ll send you some links.” Seven said before walking ahead.
“Whoa there Seven!” Zack and MC pulled him back. Zack shook his head. “Sorry man, but we still don’t know what happened to you in Ray’s route so we better not chance your plot armor.”
“AH!” Seven covered his ears. “LALALA! Don’t tell me the future or else you’ll create a time rift!!”
“Yeah true. I don’t want to get into all that crap.” Zack said before he and MC walked forward.
MC narrowed her eyes. “There’s something strange about that wall. It looks different than the others.” She pointed over at a slightly off-white colored portion.
“I see it here too!” Yoosung pointed. “Maybe it’s a secret area? LOLOL and other games do stuff like that all the time.”
MC walked up to it. “Hmm it’s not doing anything.” She put her hand up and waved it around before pressing her palm to it. A panel opened up. “Oh!”
“A scanner?” Zen looked at it closely.
“Lemme look, I have the skillz.” Seven carefully touched his palm to the green panel. “No dice. Let’s see here…” He pulled up his phone and typed in something before pressing it against the panel.
“Good job Seven.” Zack smiled. “I’m not even gonna ask how you managed to hack technology not from our world.”
“Nor should you!” They high fived as the door opened.
“Ah!” Yoosung jumped. Inside were giant tubes with green liquid. “Who knew Hollywood got it so right.”
“The answers were right under our noses.” Jaehee shook her head. “There’s nothing in them.”
Jumin peered into the room before stepping in. “Well we are in the very back or very front of the complex. This could be extra storage.”
“Look at all of these tools.” Yoosung picked up some sort of scanner. “Weird… it’s scanning our heartbeats.” He pointed it at Zen.
“W-Watch it! What if that thing is dangerous?!”
“No. Look it’s like some kind of medical scanner.”
“Star Trek is real!” Seven put a hand to his forehead, he looked like he was about to faint.
Zack nearly followed suit. “Dammit Jim, I’m a doctor not a miracle worker!”
“Ah!... AH!!” Seven’s eyes gleamed. “Oh that me in another dimensions is one lucky son of bitch! You’re a treky!?”
“I am.” Zack grinned. “You and I in my time… ah whatever. Let’s keep looking around.”
Yoosung waved the scanner around. It beeped softly in his hands as he studied it closely. “I’m getting the hang of this thing. It’s not only scanning our vitals but everything in this place. With this I’ll be able to see if someone is getting closer to us.”
“Perfect.” Jumin looked around the room. “It seems that was the only one. We’ll leave it in your hands Yoosung.”
“Leave it to me!”
After searching the room and not finding anything else, they decided to check the other rooms. Most contained the tubes with computer instruments. Seven looked through them but nothing was making much sense to anyone. After some time they had made their way into a large room with an elaborate metal door leading to god knows where.
“Ah, the final boss.” Seven looked up at it. “Whatever we’re looking for has to be in here.”
“Finally, we’ve been searching for hours.” Zen sighed.
“And yet all that searching was reduced to a single paragraph.” Zack looked up.
MC walked up to the door and took a breath. “I feel…I feel something strange behind this door.”
“Yoosung, do you read anything?” Jaehee said.
He nodded. “I wasn’t sure at first but I am now. There are two life signs in there.”
“Any way to know who or what is back there?”
“Yes. I can check the biological compounds of their body… let me see.” He pressed a few buttons on the scanner. “One is definitely human… but the other… I’ve never seen an organism with this makeup before.”
“Uhm… since when did Yoosung get so smart?”
“He’s good at science.” Zack shrugged. “Well… we have our weapons and Jaehee, we might as well go in already.”
MC nodded. “There’s only one way to go, forward.”
Seven and Zen pushed the door open. A blinding white light flooded the room. The group winced as they took a few steps forward. The light was comforting and somehow scary. It was warm yet cold.
“You’re here~” A beautiful voice spoke.
“N-No way…” The group stood there agape. Zack and MC glared.
There, on an elaborate throne with wires and tubes interconnected everywhere was a woman with long blonde – fuck it, it was Rika. Next to her was a man with white hair holding his head in agony. “Oh~ and the OC I brought here. What was your name again? Will?”
“O…C?” Zack spoke carefully.
“Other Choice. You, like that girl there, was one of my many choices to make my wish come true. You are both my vessels. My beautiful lambs who were to carry out my will.”
“And that will is?” MC spoke curtly.
“To bring the RFA to me!” Rika grinned.
“R-Rika!” Yoosung dropped to his knees. “You-You’re alive!!” He started tearing up.
Jaehee stepped forward. “This… can’t be happening. We’re in Area 51. What are you doing here?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Zack smirked. “A witch like her couldn’t possibly be human. She’s an evil being from another planet!”
“Ha! You dare say that after my side story came out?!” She glared and laughed.
“I didn’t read it!” Zack laughed. “And frankly I don’t care to read your shit! You’re like Junko Enoshima! Overrated!” That was only a burn if you’ve seen Danganronpa. And if you like Junko please don’t get mad. It was a joke.
Yoosung lifted his head. “Zack! How dare you! Rika was the kindest most sweet-“
“Let’s not get into that Yoosung.” MC looked over at him. “There’s a lot you just don’t know.”
“Now everything makes sense.” Zack put his hand to his heart. “I should’ve known. The promo art for the 3rd anniversary was trying to tell us something!”
“That’s right!” MC took a step forward. “It was a prophecy foretelling us gathering here to stop you! Seven as our warrior! Yoosung as our wizard! Jumin as our brawler! And the rest!”
“I’m beginning to wonder why Jaehee wasn’t the brawler of our group.” Seven muttered.
“Cuz she’s our mutha fuckin tank!” Zack grinned.
“Tut, and what about you two?” Rika stood up and began to walk towards the group.
“Us?” MC snorted. “We. Have.”
“Plot armor!” Zack and she said together.
“And not only that!” MC raised her phone. Zack did the same. “We have the power to RESET!”
“W-What!?” Rika took a step back.
“As much as it pains us to do so,” Zack looked down sadly, “it is the only way we learned how to stop a witch like you!”
“It’s true we did it, but we did it to stop you! To help the others! Though, I could never imagine you were an Alien from another planet. But I don’t care! Now! Now I can finally end this reset madness!!”
Music encompassed the grand hall of the very astonishing arena. It was time, they did not know why but it was time. “That guy over there!” MC pointed at the white haired person. “I won’t spoil it but we have to protect him!”
The group nodded in determination. “Yoosung,” Zack glanced back at him, “I know it’s tough but we have to do this!”
“How did this even happen?” Yoosung wiped his tears. “I… I don’t know how I feel about this but I’ll accept what I must do. Rika!! I’m so sorry!!!”
Rika didn’t seemed phased. “Pfft…hahaha! Do you really think you can stop me!? No matter what there will always be another OC who resets!”
“Y-You knew about our power!?” MC lowered her defensive stance.
“But of course. Do you see those tubes hanging from the ceiling? They relay information from different timelines of all of my precious OC’s! I know everything about every single one of you! There is nothing that can stop me! I am eternal! I AM THE SAVIOR OF THIS WORLD!!”
“I won’t allow it.”
The group turned to see…
“Jihyun!?” Rika gasped.
There at the door stood the turquoise haired man. “I was hoping this was all just a dream. I never imagined you guys would find Rika’s true area of operation.” He looked down sadly as he walked into the room. “Rika… this has gone on for far too long. You cannot hurt our friends anymore.”
She glared harshly at him. “You! YOU DEMON!”
“V! No!” MC ran up to him and shielded him with her body. “You don’t have any plot armor! NONE! Zilch! I’m doing Another Route! You won’t be saved!!! Zack help me!”
Zack sighed and walked up to V. “Fine…”
“W-What? Do you not like V?”
“Well did you do his route?”
Zack shook his head. “I wanted too but I can’t be mean to you know who. And… I just… V sometimes you irritate me.”
“Fine. V stop being stupid.”
V shook his head. “I’m not. I’m here to tell you Rika… I don’t need you to be perfect. I accept you and all your flaws.”
V continued to talk and say the things Rika had always wanted to hear. I don’t remember what it was so this is good enough.
“Jihyun…” Rika collapsed to the floor. “I…I’ll stop but in exchange you must stay by my side forever.”
Zack opened his mouth but decided not to be a smart ass. “Well… that’s all dandy but how am I going to get home?”
Rika looked over at him. “I suppose I should send you back. If you SHIFT I’ll be able to do it.”
“A… so we’re doing this time dimension jump Zero Escape Series? Well shit…”
Seven and the rest lowered their weapons. “Wow that was wacky.” The red head rubbed his temples. “I have sooooooo many questions but this isn’t the time for that.”
“Zack!” MC turned to him. “What’s SHIFT?”
“I don’t remember what it stands for but basically I have to die and jump my subconscious to another timeline.”
“D-Die!?” Yoosung gasped.
“That seems extreme.” Jaehee crossed her arms. “How are you supposed to die?”
“Like it has to be in a big way. Like an explosion for example.”
“I forgot why.” Zack looked around the complex. “We didn’t really get much out of this place… I think it’s only fitting to end this shitstorm with something epic.”
Jumin nodded. “I could drive you somewhere.”
“That would certainly kill me…”
“Hey guys!” Zen called everyone over to a table. “Look at this.”
“A phone microwave?” MC said.
“Oh!” Seven ran up to Zack. “We can just Stein’s Gate it!”
“Perfect! Now I don’t have to die!”
MC’s shoulders dropped. “But… now this is going to end with nothing. Nothing epic at all.”
“Eh…” Zack shrugged. “Well! It was nice knowing you all. I’ll remember you all in therapy!” He pressed a button and disappeared.
And that was the long awaited raid to Area 51. Remember readers, you are resetting for a reason! Don’t feel bad!
zackandghostie is my tumblr. I know Jaehee dissed it but I think it's pretty decent...well its functional. She was just upset that I didn't post some ZEN content.