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Plans Don’t Always, Well.... Go To Plan

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Wade walked into the bar the same way he always did. The same stupid half-grin and the same walk that said "I'm more important than you, so get the fuck outta my way".
"Wade Wilson, patron saint of the pitiful! What can I do for you today?" Weasel greeted his best friend. Wade sighed and looked back up at him. "I'd... I'd love a blow job."
Weasel sighed. "God, me too."
"The drink, moose knuckle. But first..." Wade placed a gold card on the table, the name JEREMY GARRET engraved in capitals on the front. Wade turned his head to the side out of boredom. He saw a small figure in a light blue hoodie, hood up, hunched over his phone while slowly sipping on a can of coca-cola.
"Kaluha, Baileys and whipped cream. I give you a blow job.... w-why dud you make that?" Weasel said as he pushed the shot glass towards his friend. "Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. Give that to Buck, tell him it's from Boothe. Little foreplay." Wade passed the drink to the girl who placed it on her drinks tray. As expected, a fight started, but that was expected. Weasel was cleaning out some glasses, when Wade tapped him on the shoulder. "Hey, who's fresh meat over there?" He asked, pointing to the small person in the blue hoodie. "Oh, him? He came in 'bout 2 hours ago. He doesn’t talk that much." Weasel replied, pouring himself another drink. Wade was quite interested in the small boy, trying to find out something about him for reasons he didn't quite understand. "What's his name?" Wade said, still staring at the small boy, who was seemingly stuck in the same position - hunced over a can of coke, scrolling through various social medias. Peter glanced over to Wade. The small boy became clearly physically uncomfortable, before leaving his bar stool and moving to an empty table directly behind Wade. Peter was secretly glancing up at Wade, who was laughing with his friend. “He’s cute.” Wade said bluntly, swivelling his bar stool round to check out the boy, who was basically engulfed in his blue hoodie. Wade nudged Weasel with his elbow. “What you say his name was again?” Wade said, not breaking his slightly creeper stare, eyeing the teen up and down. “Ummm... started with a P..... Peter I think it was. Maybe you should go talk to him.” Weasel pointed at the boy before going back to cleaning more beer and shot glasses. “You read my fucking mind.” Wade said before making his way over to Peter’s table.
When Peter spotted Wade coming over to his table he felt like he might puke out of nervousness. This *extremely* good looking ma- no, Greek God - was walking in his direction. Peter somewhat collected himself before the man sat opposite him. “Hey there, baby boy.” Wade said. Peter slowly let down the hood of his hoodie. “Hi.” Peter said swiftly.
“Oh, aren’t you a little young to be checking me out?” Wade said confidently. “No, I wasn’t .... I don’t ..... I.....” Peter stuttered before gulping. “How old are you anyway, Peter?” Wade asked before taking another sip of his drink. Peter was slightly confused at how this stranger knew his name. “How... how do you know my name?” Peter asked, genuinely terrified that the blond was a stalker. Wade simply pointed at Weasel while silently taking another sip.
Peter was slightly relieved that Wade wasn’t a stalker, as he clearly remembered telling the bartender his name. “What’s... what’s.... what’s your..” Peter stuttered. “Wade Wilson.” Wade finished, understanding what the small anxious boy was trying to ask. Wade let out a small grin. Peter covered his hands with his hoodie.
“Want me to buy you a drink or what?” Wade broke the silence between them. “Sure.” Peter replied. Wade came back with two Jack Daniel and Cokes. “Oh.... um, I can’t drink.” Peter stated as Wade shoved the alcohol in front of him. Wade giggled. “What, you driving home?”
“No, I’m not 21 yet. And I can’t drive anyway.”
Wade laughed. “Now I know you’re too innocent for me.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure...” Peter mumbled. Wade looked up from his drink. “How old are you anyway?” Wade asked, genuinely curious about the answer. Peter hesitated before answering “17.” He said swiftly. Wade was surprised. Extremely young, but older than he expected. The kid looked about 13. “24. And don’t take this wrong, but you look about 12.” Wade pointed out. “It’s fine. I get that lot actually.” Peter said as he smiled.
Wade gently pushed the drink towards Peter. “C’mon, try it.” Wade said simply.
Peter raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t it illegal?”
“Awww... cute. Honey, everything here is illegal.”
Peter gulped before grabbing the glass. “My dads are gunna kill me.” Peter said before sipping the alcohol.
Wade slowly leaned closer. Peter definitely uncomfortable now. “Wow.... are you trying to kiss me?” Peter said before pushing Wade back into his seat. ‘Oh yeah, Wade. You may be a stunner, but not every man is gunna go gay for you.’ Wade thought. Wade snapped out of his little love trance.
“Yeah.” Wade answered. He did want to kiss him, but then again, he was a little tipsy. “But, like I said, you are definitely too innocent for a guy like me.” Wade said before backing up in his seat. Peter took another sip of his drink, his arm slightly shaking from nervousness, not even trying to counter Wade with all the shit Peter had gone through as Spider-Man himself. “Hey. You busy?” Wade said after he finished the Jack and Coke. “No?” Peter asked, confused. Peter looked at his watch. 11:39. His curfew was 12:30 am. He had time, right?
“So, what are we gunna do?” Peter asked, trying to ease the tension in his shoulders.
“Whatever I want.” Wade replied simply.
Peter’s whole body tensed up. “Wow, wow, wow..... are you trying to hook up with me?”
Wade grinned. “Would you say no to that?”
“Do you want the answer I want to give you or the truthful one?”
“Truth.” Wade said as he leaned back in his chair.
“Then I wouldn’t say no to that.” Peter chuckled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ Time Skip Because I’m Lazy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Time to put balls in holes. You agreed to whatever I want.” Wade said gently, Peter’s arms wrapped around the elders neck. “I get it,” Peter said “You love Ski-ball. More than you love.... sex.”
“It’s a tough call. Get ready to get your ass handed to you.”
Peter removed his arms from around the blond’s neck. “Ok then, bring it.” The teen said.
Wade threw the heavy black ball into the 100,000 points hole. “Ruh-Roh.” Peter said, imitating Scooby-Doo (Which was still Peter’s favourite TV show, even in his teenage years).
“Ruh-Roh.” Wade copied.
“Voltron, Defender Of The Universe ring, por favor.” Wade said as he slammed all 256,471 tickets onto the prize counter.
“And I will take the gummy bears.” Peter said.
The person behind the counter shuffled with the tickets for a short while, before grabbing one of the rings and placing it on the table. “You are now the proud defender of the planet Arus.” He then placed a pack of gummies next to the ring “And you can now eat something.”
Peter gave a polite smile to the man behind the counter.
“M’lady.” Was expected joked before extending out his arm, Peter hooking onto it. Peter looked down at his watch. 12:17.
“I’m sorry, but I have to go. You know. Curfew.” Peter said, slightly disappointed that he had to leave. “Aww c’mon. You’re already out. Break the rules.” Wade said, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets.
You know what? Peter kinda didn’t what to go home. The whole reason Peter went out was because he had a fight with Tony. “Sure. Why not?” Peter said, putting his hood back up.
Wade and Peter had decided to go back to Wade’s apartment for a couple hours. Peter’s hoodie was soaking from the rainy walk. He. Was. FREEZING.
Wade noticed the brown haired boy visibly shaking, when he looked up from his video game. The blond bit down his controller and grabbed a blanket off of a chair, and wrapped the high-schooler in it.
Wade then did something he thought he might regret in a few seconds.


He kissed the brown haired teen on the cheek. And as he went to walk away, the 24 year-old felt something grab his arm and spin him around. Peter then shoved him back on the bed. Wade then edged closer to Peter’s face.

He then pushed both of their lips together.

Peter could already taste the whiskey on Wade’s breath. Wade then pulled away from the smaller boy. “Are you gonna be okay with this?” Wade asked softly.
Peter nodded. Wade moved his hands to Peter’s small waist.


This was gonna be a fun night.


Both men were breathing heavily. Peter head was laying on Wade’s chest, listening to his heartbeat.
Wade’s arm was wrapped around Peter’s hips, the teen’s fingers interlocked with his.
Peter then caught a glimpse of the time. 4:23 am.
Peter finally shot out of the bed and swiftly picked up his clothes.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Wade whispered.
“I was supposed to be home 4 hours ago! My parents are gonna kill me!” Peter replied, panicked.
“Hey, hey, hey... calm down.” Wade gently soothed Peter. “They can’t stay mad forever.”
Wade pressed a kiss to Peter’s hair.
“Bye.” Peter said swiftly.
Peter was running home when he felt a tear running down his cheek. He didn’t know why.

He stopped for a second to catch his breath. He pulled out his phone to check the time. The small boy noticed a piece of paper stuck to the back of his phone case. He unfolded and smiled at the note.


(Insert phone number here)