Yoongi pulls his sweater close to him, gripping tightly to shield himself from the cold. It’s late, two am now, as he walks home from his studio. He stayed late, again, because of a fight with Seokjin. How Yoongi is careless about his health, and that his husband misses him, to just stay home.
He had snapped back at Seokjin, telling him that he has deadlines to meet, that he can’t slack off. It caused them to have another huge fight, they’ve been having a lot of those lately. They spouted angry things at each other, things Yoongi wishes he could take back.
He saw the hurt in Seokjin’s eyes. He can hear the pain in his voice as he told him to not come back for the night, that he needed to be alone. He didn’t miss the quiet sniffles Seokjin tried to hold back as Yoongi walked out the door.
He sighs, pulling out his phone, debating if he should even bother calling or texting his husband to let him know he’s coming back to make up, to talk things out. He decides against it, stuffing his phone back in his pocket. He rounds the corner to see a bundle huddled up against the building. He walks cautiously, in case it was a mugger.
When he gets closer, an elderly woman’s head pops out from the bundle, startling him. She looks him dead in the eye. Her voice is quiet, humble.
“You will lose something that is precious if you aren’t careful.” She warns him. He scoffs, continuing on his way, when he hears her call out again.
“You will lose him. Heed with caution. He will no longer be yours. Your anger will get the best of you, and it will be your downfall.” And she snaps her fingers.
He turns back to her, “You’re crazy, you old bat.” But he speaks to no one. He looks around, seeing that the old lady has disappeared. He really must be tired if he’s seeing and hearing things. He takes out his phone again, looking up flights to Japan, and books tickets for a hotel for a three night stay. Hopefully this will help, a getaway from the real world with his husband, to reconnect. To apologize for his behavior, a promise he’ll do better.
He makes it home, noting the quiet. Seokjin probably went to Namjoon’s house, knowing Yoongi would try to come back to apologize.
He climbs into bed after his nightly routine, brushing his teeth and washing his face with a hopeful mind that Seokjin will be happy about their trip. He smiles as he thinks of his husband’s face, doe eyes shining, his smooth, silky blond hair, and he misses the warmth. He lets the darkness take him into a peaceful slumber. Tomorrow will be a better day.
Waking up the next morning, he rubs his eyes as he fumbles for his phone, pressing on Namjoon’s contact info. After a few rings, Namjoon answers.
“Hey Namjoon.” He says groggily, voice heavy with sleep.
A slight chuckle comes from the other line. “You’re not much of a morning person. What are you doing up this early?”
“I’m calling to see if Seokjin made it to your place okay last night.“
“Why would he be at my place?” Namjoon questions, clearly confused. “And why would you be calling about my brother? You never ask about him. What’s going on?”
He sits upright, fully awake from what he’s just heard.
“God dammit, Namjoon. What the fuck are you talking about? We live together.” He snaps.
Another laugh. “How much did you drink last night?”
“I’m not fucking joking, Namjoon. Where is Seokjin?” Yoongi demands, impatient. It’s way too early for this bullshit. “Where is he?”
“He’s with his husband in France. You know, Jimin? I thought you knew this. You were at the wedding. Seriously, how much did you drink last night? Are you still drunk?”
The words of the old lady come back to him. ‘You will lose those that you love’. He panics, hanging the phone up. He tosses it to the side as he goes through his closet, seeing only his clothes there. No big, fluffy sweaters in sight. He runs to the bathroom, no extra toothbrush, no strawberry shampoo to be seen.
This has to be a mistake. He goes through the apartment, seeing that the pictures of them together that were on the walls are no longer there, but awards and pictures of his friends are. Not one of Seokjin and him in sight. He slumps to the floor, leaning against the wall for support. This can’t be true.
He looks through the pictures in his phone. All the ones he took of Seokjin cooking, sleeping, playing games, all gone. Yoongi fumbles with the screen, going to Seokjin’s social media profile.
He’s there, Seokjin is there, but Yoongi isn’t. Photos of him and a blond haired man, plump lips almost matching Seokjin’s, litter his Instagram page. Photos of them in the Caribbean, mushy captions of how he’s the luckiest man to be married to this Jimin man. One in particular catches his attention. His heart is clenching looking at this intimate photo, ones Yoongi use to take of the two of them.
Seokjin is lying in bed, asleep, shirt off, leaning against Jimin’s equally naked torso. The Jimin Guy is smiling into the camera, hand in Seokjin’s hair captioning,
“I’m the luckiest man in the world. Hacked by your baby Jiminie.” And a bunch of heart emojis. Seokjin loves emojis.
He can only cry, seeing as he fucked up big time.
He lost his one true love.
Hey-o everyone! The time has come! I’ve made this into a chaptered fic, and I’m so excited to continue this! I wanted to maybe turn it into a series, but it’d end up being like a chapter each new update so I thought, why the hell not!
Here’s the first part! Thank you to those who’ve left kudos and comments on the first part, it means so much to me!
Anywho, lets get this started!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
The open window let in a soft breeze, the smell of wet concrete and the soft drip drops of the sprinkles of rain fill the air. Yoongi didn’t know what to do. The first thing he did after he realized what happened with Seokjin, being thrown in this parallel universe where he wasn’t married to the love of his life anymore, was look for the old lady he had encountered on his way home that one night.
He looked everywhere for her. Day and night, he waited at the same spot, walked by the same building each night, just waiting for her to show. She never did.
He picks himself up from the warmness of his bed with a heavy sigh. Life without Seokjin was... bland. He didn’t have the luxury of coming back home from the studio to see Seokjin singing softly in the kitchen, dancing to the beat drifting through his mind, or seeing Seokjin curled up on their couch with a mug of chocolate ice cream with whipped cream and peanuts after a long day at the modeling agency. And he missed it, so fucking much.
Yoongi didn’t have the pleasure of waking up to the most gentle of butterfly kisses pressed to his neck anymore, never being able to wake up in the comfort of those warm, strong arms, hands caressing the skin between his hip. And to say that it devastated him each and every time he woke up was an understatement.
Days passed, soon turned into weeks. He immersed himself in his work, never once leaving his studio unless he needed to eat or take a piss, often times sleeping an hour or two on the pull out couch he had stashed in the corner of the room, only to focus on his productions once more when he had awaken. Namjoon noticed Yoongi’s off behavior, often asking what was wrong.
Of course, he debated with himself of telling Namjoon everything, how he was suddenly thrown into this unknown world where the two weren’t married anymore; how Seokjin and him were once an item, never going anywhere without the other unless it was for work, how they had plans of adopting a puppy and a kitten, when they dreamed of owning a huge house with a large yard for their future kids to explore.
In the end, he decided to dismiss it all, waving Namjoon off with a grunted, “Just work stuff.” Namjoon never seemed to believe him, but never once called him out on it, sensing that his friend needed his space, his thoughts to be kept to himself until he was ready.
That’s what he liked about Namjoon, the subtle actions he made were loud and clear, giving him space when needed, but with a gentle but firm grip on his shoulder, letting him know that he was there to listen, whenever Yoongi was ready to share his thoughts. The way Namjoon would drop by with bags of take out or snacks, water bottles and coffee on hand. He was very thankful for Namjoon stumbling into his life, glad he was able to befriend him at a show where they were introduced by a mutual friend. Because of Namjoon, he had met the ever so beautiful Seokjin.
He stared up at the morning from the window, a scatter of grey clouds and blue skies, the sprinkle of rain coming down a little harder minute by minute. Memories of how he and Seokjin would cuddle on the bed, listening to the rain pour down in when they were too lazy to get out of bed flooded his thoughts, the softest of whimpers he’d let out when Seokjin would let his hands wander, grazing, caressing, loving.
“I miss you so fucking much.” Yoongi spoke out loud. Tears formed in his eyes as he closed them, listening to the drops hitting the pavement.
He’s on his way home, a rare thing now, nothing on his mind but one thing: Seokjin.
What is he doing right now? Is he eating properly? Is that... man, taking care of him, pampering Seokjin the way he deserves? Is the man touching him like Yoongi use to? Does he know that Seokjin needs cuddles at the end of every day, to be shown how much he’s loved because Seokjin’s always unsure of himself?
Of course Jimin should know, they’re married after all, he thinks to himself. The word leaves a bitter taste in his mind, angered that someone else gets to touch his beloved, being able to feel Seokjin inside them, to feel the soft touches Seokjin would leave when they were inside him.
He wonders how they met, if Namjoon had introduced them like Yoongi was, if Seokjin had the slight blush to his cheeks when they shook hands and talked the night away, if they immediately connected as if they’ve known each other their whole lives like he and Seokjin had.
Shaking his thoughts away, he happens to glance up, seeing someone he’s been looking for all too long.
He rushes forward, making haste to get to her side before she disappeared into thin air, and tugged her coat sleeve to grab her attention.
“It’s you again!” The woman startled as she looked behind to see who had laid their hand on her. “How’s life?” She asks.
Yoongi scoffs, grip tightening on her sleeve. “I want Seokjin back.”
The woman looks at him, wrinkles in her face creasing to form a grim smile. “I can’t help you, young man. What’s done is done now.”
“Why did you take him away from me?” He asks lowly, slowly letting go of the tightness he had to her coat. “He was my everything, and now I have nothing.”
“You’re recognized now. Isn’t that what you wanted? The awards, the praise, everyone noticing your hard work. Those restless nights holed up in your studio paid off.”
“That’s not what I wanted.” Yoongi says shaking his head, letting go of her as he paces back and forth in front of her.
“Yes it is. It’s the whole reason why you lost him. You prioritized work over him, the countless fights of him begging you to come home. Do you realize how many tears he’s shed because of you? How many sleepless nights he’s had to endure because of your selfishness?”
Yoongi stops, picking his head up to look her in the eye.
“You lost him. Even if I didn’t interfere, he would have gone eventually.” She pauses. “You began to neglect him. He could only take so much, you would have driven him away.”
“Please.” Yoongi begs with a shaky breath, coming to his knees in front of her to bow as low as he can. “I need him back. I’m miserable without him. I miss him, I love him. I need him back..”
“Pick yourself up, son.” He kneels down to grasp his hand, coaxing Yoongi to look at her, wrinkles and all. “There is one thing that can turn this all around.”
“Anything, anything! Please.” He pleas. “I’ll do anything.” She smiles at him, and when he sees the mysterious glint in her eye, she says,
“Make him fall for you once again. Show him how much love you have for him, how much he means to you. And when that happens, everything will turn back to how it once was.”
“How will I know when he’s in lo-“ he begins, but she abruptly cuts him off, continuing.
“Be warned though, it won’t be an easy task. There will be many obstacles in your way.” She says. “There is one more condition.”
He bites his lip, staring at her. His heart is racing, awaiting to hear something he probably doesn’t want to.
“He must be the one to kiss you first,” She says, “but if you fail, you will lose everything and more.”
“God! Why is no one right for this!?” Yoongi says a little loudly, head in his palms.
Namjoon hums next to him, patting his back reassuringly. “We’ll find someone, don’t worry.”
“No ones vocals work! We’ve been through too many artists already, Joon! How many more are we going to go through!?” Yoongi is frustrated, no one’s voice works with this song, he’s tried asking the many artists that work in the building. None seem to fit his qualifications.
“Look, I know you’re upset, but don’t lash out just yet. It’ll happen. Just be patient.” Namjoon sighs, also frustrated but trying not to show it. He knows it’ll only stress Yoongi out even more.
A few moments later, Namjoon picks his head up.
“I’ve got it.” Namjoon says, wide, dimpled smile on his face.
“Please, enlighten me. I don’t know who else we can call in the company.” Yoongi states as he clicks here and there on the software, moving around beats.
“He’s not from the company.” Namjoon says as he types on his phone.
“What do you mean ‘not from the company?’ Namjoon, who else do you know?” Yoongi eyes Namjoon wearingly.
“Its a surprise!” Namjoon says as he bolts from the chair, running into the hallway with his phone pressed to his ear, keys in hand.
“Our savior is here!” Namjoon says as he walks in a half an hour later.
“Can’t you just tell me?” Yoongi mumbles frustratedly. He has a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, churning with nerves and anxiousness. “I’m not good with people, Joon, c’mon...” he pauses when he looks up, seeing who’s standing next to Namjoon, and his heart stops.
“Hi,” Seokjin waves with a smile, “Yoongi, right? The pianist from the wedding? It’s nice to see you again.”
He stands up abruptly with eyes wide and wet, bringing his chair to knock into his studios table. Namjoon eyes him curiously, but doesn’t say anything, merely observing Yoongi’s behavior.
“Seokjin...” he manages to breathe out. God, he looks beautiful. His hair looks recently bleached, a pretty platinum blond. He’s wearing a large oversized beige hoodie, some acid washed jeans with a couple rips in them, and some black suede pumas creepers. Yoongi wants nothing more than to embrace him, pepper kisses all over his face, but he feels paralyzed. He’s stunned to see Seokjin in front of him again.
He wants to scream the words that he’s sorry, to come back to him, tell him how much he misses him, but he can’t. He doesn’t belong to Yoongi.
Yoongi’s brought out of his daze when Namjoon clears his throat.
“You remember my brother Seokjin right?” Namjoon says, as if he didn’t hear Yoongi JUST say his name. All he can do is nod, eyes glued to Seokjin, words still stuck in his throat.
He’s RIGHT about to speak when another body enters the room. One he wishes didn’t exist at this moment.
The second Jimin walks in, he doesn’t even spare a passing glance at Yoongi as he kisses Seokjin’s cheek and intertwined their fingers and smiles brightly at Seokjin as he giggles.
“I don’t know if you remember Jimin,” the words pierce through Yoongi’s heart painfully as Seokjin says that with an equally wide smile, “since it was a few years ago, but this is my husband.”
The bright smile Seokjin gives Jimin is breaking his heart, Seokjin use to look at HIM like that. He clenches his hands by his sides, debating if he should leave or just hear Namjoon out. He doesn’t have to make the decision, as Namjoon starts speaking again.
“I asked Jimin if he can sing Serendipity for us. I know, I know, he’s a choreographer, but you NEED to hear him sing.” Namjoon says, a hint of pleading behind his words.
“He’s amazing. You should give him a chance.” Seokjin says as he gives a light squeeze to Jimin’s hand. Jimin flushes red, dogging his face into Seokjin’s chest.
“Babe! Stop embarrassing me!” Jimin pouts into his sweater.
“I’m just telling the truth! Don’t be so shy! Show him what you’ve got. If that’s okay?” Seokjin directs the last part to Yoongi, eyes shining. Namjoon is behind the two of them, bringing his palms together in silent beg.
Yoongi ponders this for a moment. If Jimin is here, then that means Seokjin will be around. Until they finish this anyway. This is his chance.
“Sure, lets give it a shot.” He says, and Namjoon fist pumps in the air, Seokjin claps excitedly, and Jimin nods.
“Where do you want me to start?” Jimin says eagerly as he walks around the studio, letting go of Seokjin’s hand to fiddle with the equipment.
“Please don’t touch anything.” He says a little bit with distaste and he winces internally. That came out sounding harsher than he intended, and everyone can sense it. Jimin does look sorry though, as he pries his fingers off of the sound equipment.
“Sorry, I’m just a tad excited. I didn’t mean to overstep.”
Yoongi just nods, “Just head up into the booth and read over the lines until you’ve got the hang of it. Then we can start.”
As Jimin enters the booth, Namjoon excuses himself to grab some snacks and drinks from the vending machines, leaving Seokjin and Yoongi alone, and his heart speeds up.
He doesn’t know what to say, he doesn’t want to feel like he’s rushing too quickly, but he’s alone— well, semi alone— with Seokjin now, and he looks up to Seokjin as he stands in front of the equipment, looking at it with longing.
“Do you sing?” Yoongi asks. He doesn’t know why, but those are the first words that come to mind. Seokjin nods, but looks upset as he does so.
“All the time. But it’s not for me. I’m terrible.” Seokjin says with a light, bitter laugh.
“I’m sure you sound beautiful.” Yoongi blurts out, gaze not leaving Seokjin’s frame.
Seokjin snaps his head in his direction and stares straight into his eyes, his own wide and his ears turning a shade of red. It’s gone in a flash though, and Seokjin shakes his head.
“Thank you for giving Jimin a chance. I know he’s not a professional, but he’s great. His voice is amazing.”
hey hey yall! thought it was time to update this bad boy. i finally unlocked my twitter acct, so if you wanna check it out, its right here --> https://twitter.com/DimplesPout
thank you to those who have been suuuuuuper patient with me updating. i sincerely apologize, i just needed the stress of not worrying about updating, and to save me from this stress, i have decided that i will be writing either smaller chapters, or not updating until the story is almost finished. writers block also doesnt help in these situations, and tack on depression, anxiety, and the constant feel of being useless, and youll have me. ive had episodes almost every other night where i break down, and most of the time i have no idea why. i have also decided to slow down on my smoking, so my nerves are even more through the roof now that i dont have nicotine in my system. my boyfriend recently bought me a vape pen to try and help me accomplish this, and so far without cigarettes, my body is pretty much going haywire from the sudden stop. its put me off from a lot recently, so i hope you can forgive me! i hope you understand, and thank you again for being patient with me! <3
anyway, lets get onto this chapter! enjoy!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
"Jimin, you"re off a few scales. Let's try this again from the top." Yoongi sighs into the mic. He tries not to sound so displeased, but he can't help it. It's frustrating. They've been in the studio for days now, and only made a small dent in what needed to be done, barely a few lines. They needed to cut the last two sessions extremely short, seeing as Jimin forgot he needed to attend to his studio of students he was currently teaching as a favor for one of the other choreographers, some family emergency apparently. Yoongi wasnt paying too much attention. He understands, sure, but its not like Yoongi is fairing any better; hes also busy. Yoongi needs another coffee, or a shot of whiskey to keep his mind in the game.
Jimin nods from inside the sound booth, giving him a thumbs up and closes his eyes, taking a few deep breaths in and out slowly. Yoongi can tell he's tired; they all are. But he has a deadline to meet, and he's ready for this to just be over and done with.
"You need to be a little easier on him, it's his first time recording.." Namjoon whispers in his ear as he hands him an iced americano from Yoongi's favorite cafe, eyes trained on Jimin's form behind the soundproof glass. Yoongi merely nods and takes a sip from the straw, not giving eye contact as he tweaks at the synthesizer with one hand.
It's not that Jimin sounds BAD per say, he's incredible actually, but the sound is still rough. A few scales off here and there, otherwise he's perfect. It's not Jimin's fault whatsoever. Yoongi just has a certain melody and sound in mind for this one, and he wants it to be perfect.
There's a small knock on the door from outside, he would recognize that knock anywhere. Before Namjoon or Yoongi could even say 'come in', Seokjin peers his fluffy head in and gives them a shy smile as he slips in and shuts the door quietly behind him.
"I hope I'm not interrupting?" Seokjin says timidly from his spot as he eyes the two, fiddling with his oversize hoodie sleeve that's currently engulfing his hands in the cutest sweater paws. Yoongi almost, ALMOST, coos out loud.
Namjoon chuckles and head towards his brother to give him a big hug.
"You could never interrupt. We were taking a quick breather anyway." Namjoon gestures for Seokjin to take a seat on the pleather couch against the wall. As he takes a seat, he looks up to Yoongi.
"Hi." Seokjin gives him a small but blinding smile with those beautiful, plump lips.
"H-hi." Yoongi stutters. Oh, GOD he sounds like an idiot. He clears his throat, sitting up straighter. "How've you been? You haven't been around the past few times." Yoongi tries to sound nonchalant, but of course he fails. Namjoon raises his eyebrow at his behavior, but Yoongi ignores it.
"Ah, yeah. I've uh, been busy." Seoljin looks everywhere but at him, scratching at the back of his head.
Something's wrong. He's lying. Yoongi knows all of Seokjin's tells. Seokjin's ears are turning a tint of pink and his voice is kind of shaky, and he isn't making eye contact with neither him or Namjoon, but eyes trained on the floor. He wants to pry, pick him apart, kiss him, ask him what's wrong. Cuddle him, love him until he hears Seokjin's giggles, to see the plush smile he fell in love with. Be his shoulder to cry on again, let all his worries to. He isn't allowed to anymore. Comforting him is out of the question. It sets an ache in him, and his mind is reeling in what could be the matter.
Yoongi must have been staring too long, because Namjoon clears his throat and claps his hands together. "Let's get back to recording, yeah?" Namjoon stands, heading towards the empty chair next to Yoongi and fiddles with the buttons. Turning his attention back to Jimin, Jimin's been standing there with an unreadable expression as he looks at Yoongi. There's a small glint in his eye that briefly scares him. The look is gone in a flash as Jimin looks to Seokjin. Yoongi looks back at Seokjin, who is scrolling through something on his phone. A small tap on the glass, Seokjin looks up at Yoongi, then Jimin, and blows Jimin a kiss. Jimin pretends to catch it, putting it in his pocket, and blows one right back at Seokjin. Seokjin pretends to catch it as well, but brings his small fist to his lips and gives it a little kiss.
Seokjin turns his attention back on his phone, taking out some headphones and melts into the couch as he closes his eyes and leans his head back, mouthing words to something he's listening to. Yoongi looks towards Jimin again, a flash of smugness crosses his features before he speaks into the mic and says, "I'm ready, Yoongi."
"Aaaaaaand i think that's a wrap! You did so great today, Jimin. We'll do a quick run through tomorrow, but otherwise this is pretty much done!" Namjoon says. "Bring the same energy in that you brought today, and we should be finished recording!" Namjoon says through the speaker. Jimin gives him a big smile, eyes crinkling into small creasants as he takes off the headphones and practically runs to the sound booths door. Seokjin is already standing when Jimin engulfs him in a hug, lifting him off the floor and twirling him around. Seokjin squeals, pleading for Jimin to let him down.
Anger rushes through Yoongi as he watches the exchange with heated eyes. He wants to rip off Jimin's hands from Seokjin's waist, tear off his lips he's planting all over Seokjin's face.
Namjoon groans as he packs his backpack, "God, get a room. Y'all are disgusting. I love you two, but please, for the love of all that is sacred, please stop."
Jimin lets out an obnoxiously loud laugh. "Sorry Joonie. I'm just happy we're practically done. Who knew singing was so exhausting? Oh, it was so much fun though." Jimin curls his hand around Seokjin, pulling him close, burying his nose into Seokjin;s neck. "And I'm just so happy Jinnie bear was here. It was a pleasant surprise."
'Oh, what a pleasant surprise it was to see someone you see every single fucking day' Yoongi mocks internally, turning off the synthesizer harshly. God, what an ass.
"You see me everyday, I'm nothing special." Seokjin says shyly.
Yes you are, Yoongi's thinks.
Jimin's giggling stops. Namjoon's groaning stops. Everything stops.
Oh shit. He looks at everyone with a panic in his eyes, and they're all staring at him. Seokjin's ears are pink as he's looking down at his feet. Jimin is giving him that dark look again. Namjoon's just staring at him. Fuck. Did he say that outloud?
"Yes, you did." Namjoon says with a questioning look.
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