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Roll for Seduction

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The dragon roared, angry and furious at the adventurers who had stormed their way into its cave. Its teeth were sharp, its claws vicious, and its reputation as terror of the southern reaches well-deserved.

“What color was it?” Sebastian interrupted.

Blaine pressed his mouth together. “I was getting there.”

“I assume it’s a chromatic dragon,” Sebastian said, rolling his dice in the palm of his hand. “But somebody should cast detect evil just to be sure. Unless our DM wants to just let us know and save us the effort.”

Blaine clicked his jaw shut and didn’t say anything.

Sebastian grinned back.

Tina glared at Sebastian. “Did you invite yourself just to pick on Blaine?”

“Tina,” Blaine protested weakly.

“I’m just saying that it’s really suspicious that Sebastian shows up to D&D night right after you break up with Kurt. It’s rubbing salt in the sound, that’s what it is.”

“I invited him,” Blaine pointed out. “And Kurt and I broke up at least four months ago.”

“Well, yeah,” Tina admitted.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow. “Blaine can take care of himself,” he said. “I’m just asking the questions I need to make the best decisions for the party.”

“You got drunk and hit on the first person you saw,” Artie pointed out. “I don’t know if that would be called making the best decisions.”

“I’m in-character.”

“Suuuure,” Tina muttered.

“More than I can say about you,” Sebastian drawled back.

“Excuse me?”

“Guys, do we have to do this?”

Sam is in-character, which is why he’s only spoken in Elvish this entire game.”

Sam let out a remarkably melodic agreement in what they all assumed was Elvish.

“And my character is remarkably attracted to all of the NPCs, especially since they’re played by Blaine.” Sebastian smirked. “Tell me Killer, has the ass on that dragon got anything on yours?”

“I’m not answering that,” Blaine said, before Tina could say anything else. “You all enter the dragon’s lair. It’s dark. You can roll for perception to figure out what color it is.”

Sebastian rolled his dice.

“Seriously?” Tina demanded.

“Seventeen should tell me what color it is,” Sebastian replied to Blaine.

“It’s red.”

“Hot,” Sebastian concluded. He winked at Blaine again, just in case Blaine got confused about who he was directing the commentary to. Blaine rolled his eyes back.

“Why did you invite him?” Tina hissed to Blaine.

Sebastian replied before Blaine could, “A chance to see Blaine as a dungeon master? I have to admit I was expecting more whips and chains.”

Sam, Tina, and Artie stared. “Gross,” Artie finally said. Tina’s face was contorted in an expression torn between disgust and horror. Sam offered his own opinion in Elvish.

Blaine said, to Sebastian, “That’s your own fault for making assumptions.”

“Yeah, I don’t know why I thought you’d be having kinky sex with your adventurers club.”

“Can we change the subject?” Artie asked. “I would like to get back to the dragon.” Blaine obligingly turned to the monster handbook on the table to roll its stats.

“No,” Tina said stridently. She slapped her hands on the table. “Why are we playing with this…?”

“Evil Meerkat?” Sebastian offered.

“Yes! No.” Tina frowned at him. “What? Where did you get meerkat from? You don’t look like a meerkat. They’re much cuter.”

“I think Sebastian’s pretty cute,” Blaine said absently, rolling another dice and making a note of the number on his notepad.

The New Directions member directed their aghast shock to Blaine. Sebastian grinned.

“What?” Blaine looked up. “Why are you all looking at me like that?”

“Did you just call Sebastian cute?” Tina demanded.

“Blaine,” Artie said, “is there something you want to say?”

Sam said, in English, “Are you dating Sebastian?”

Blaine froze. “What did I say?”

Sebastian propped up his chin in a hand. His grin didn’t abate. “You called me cute.”

“You are,” Blaine said. Then, he remembered that it was Dungeons and Dragons night with the New Directions seniors (sans Brittany) and went, “Oh. Shit.”

“Cat’s out of the bag now,” Sebastian crowed.

“Blaine?” Tina’s voice quivered.

Blaine swallowed. He put his notepad on the table—facedown, so nobody could see the dragon’s newly rolled stats—and cleared his throat. “Um, well, Sam’s right. Sebastian and I are dating.”

“Is that why you invited him to D&D night?” Tina demanded.

He smiled sheepishly. “I know that we’ve had our differences—”

“He threw rock salt into your eye!” Tina shouted.

“I apologized for that,” Sebastian pointed out.

“And you tried to blackmail Rachel and Finn,” Artie pointed out.

“I also apologized for that,” Sebastian added.

“Not helping,” Blaine said to Sebastian. “Guys, listen. Sebastian’s my friend. I forgave him for the rock salt. And after Kurt and I broke up, he kept me from getting blackout drunk at Scandals and we started talking more. About a month ago I asked him out.”

“I said yes,” Sebastian said, voice too helpful to actually be helpful. “Just in case you guys haven’t figured that out yet.”


Sebastian shrugged, mostly unrepentant.

“Cool,” Sam said, finally. “I didn’t know you were into D&D, Sebastian.”

“Well, I’m not, but Killer here is.” He slung a familiar arm around Blaine’s shoulder. “Also, Blaine wanted me to meet his friends.”

“We’ve met before,” Tina pointed out.

“Multiple times,” Artie added.

“I mean,” Blaine interrupted, flushing. “I’d like it we all got along.” He looked beseeching at the others. “Hang out sometimes? Maybe do D&D night together?”

Sam said, “Sure. It’s good to have somebody with decent charisma stats in the party.”

“Sam!” Tina exclaimed.

“Sam has a point,” Artie said, decisively. “Whatever my personal feelings for Sebastian, if I am looking out for the best interests of our party, having somebody with an 18 for charisma is only going to benefit us.”

Tina stared, aghast. “But what about Kurt?”

“Kurt doesn’t play D&D,” Sam pointed out.

“I meant—” She turned to Blaine. “I thought Kurt was your true love.”

Blaine took a breath. Sebastian’s arm around his shoulder tensed, in support, and then relaxed again, trusting Blaine in whatever he chose to say.

“It didn’t work out, Tina.” He said, “I loved Kurt. A part of me always will. But I love Sebastian, and I’m with Sebastian now.”

Tina studied him, gauging his sincerity. “I’m not completely okay with this,” she finally said.

Blaine closed his eyes.

“But if he makes you happy.”

“He does.”

“Then he can join us for D&D. But I’m drawing the line at Sunday brunch.”

“Deal.” Sebastian leaned across the table, and shook hands with Tina is unusual sobriety. “You may have Blaine for brunch on Sunday—”

“I’m right here.”

“And I’ll have him Friday nights and all Saturdays—”

“That’s over 36 hours!”

“Boyfriend privileges.”

“What about best friend privileges?”

“What about them? I don’t see Evans complaining.”

Blaine interrupted: “Are you guys dividing me?”

“Just your time,” Sebastian reassured. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you have more than enough time to get down and dirty.”

“Gross,” Artie groaned, again.

“I don’t know what you were thinking of,” Sebastian said, corner of his mouth tugging up in far too much delight. “I was talking about going to the gym.”

Artie spluttered.

“Guys,” Blaine interrupted. “Sebastian. Cut it out. You especially. I know you’re just talking shit just to rile them up now.”

Sebastian conceded the point, slouching into his chair with his usual dancer’s grace. Tina settled back in her chair. She still eyed Sebastian suspiciously, but her shoulders were relaxed. Artie coughed a little longer, before taking a few sips of his Mountain Dew to clear his throat.

Sam said, “So, the dragon?”

“Right.” Blaine flipped over the notepad. “The dragon roars ominously. It’s red. What would you like to do?”

“Oh,” Sebastian said. “That’s easy.” He winked at Blaine. “I seduce the dragon.”