It's my twelfth life. I have every memory from every life. I've had many names. I've seen many things. I didn't expect to wake up in rubble at the age of five, but I wasn't really surprised.
Helen and Jack Pevensie took me in, such kind people when born into such a cruel world. Of course I had no memories of my 'birth parents'. Turns out they left me in that house when I was three. Delightful people. I refused to be adopted, not because I didn't wan't a family but because I already had one. Between every life I have 24 hours in Limbo where I can talk to my family. They watch over me when they can but the afterlife is a big place and there is only so many screens to watch from.
Let me explain.
My first name, and the name that I will always go by no matter how many lives I live, is Harry Potter. I am the Master of Death. It means I have a certain amount of lives to live before I can choose an heir, someone to take my place. That person could be centuries into the future, but I would send the Hallows down to earth to wait for their next master. I would finally die a proper death. Of course I always have the option to continue until I reach that point again. Something rather amusing about the whole new life situation is that I always keep similar features to my first life. I always have darker hair, different shades of green eyes and I can feel every scar on my body, but nobody can see them unless I obtain a scar in that life, they cannot see an old scars from my past lives. Except of course for that time when I had bright neon blue (I swear that was also my sixth life!)
Anyhow now I'm Harrison Lucas Pevensie - just because I'm not adopted doesn't mean I can't take the name.
They had Peter when I was seven. So bright, polite I could see it a mile away; he would be the Golden boy, the perfect son. And I couldn't help but feel sorry for any siblings he might gain. He knew first, all about me, my past, about Harry Potter, but he didn't believe it. Not that I expected him too, to Peter it was just a made up bedtime story. He had so much of Jack in him, smart, practical, someone who would believe if it was possible in reality, not some "fiction nonsense" and yet he looked so much like Helen.
Susan was born a year later, She was Jack all over including in looks. She knew lots of facts, could spout them off at random things, was extremely intelligent from a young age yet rather like a girl from my first life; she didn't know how to say it without coming across bossy and a know it all. Of course I told Susan, but I was careful, changing things to make them seem more realistic. Peter and Susan were joint at the hip even with their differences.
Edmund was an ill baby when he was born, I was nine so Helen and Jack deemed me responsible enough to look after the other two whilst they tended to Edmund. And still I ended up beside his cot whilst Jack was downstairs entertaining Pete and Su. I remember whispering my first story to him, telling him about how I was malnourished as a child, weak, then saying just as quietly; that I got stronger and he will too. That boy is anything but weak. However unlike Peter he wasn't perfect and unlike Susan he didn't spout off his knowledge, I saw the disappointment in Jack's eyes. Consequently, I saw it in his elder siblings also.
Lucy was always a happy baby, from the moment she was born, smiling. She, I knew, would be the light her siblings would follow anywhere. So eccentric and bubbly just like a Ravenclaw I used to know. She was so much like her mother, bright blue eyes, dreamy, so amazingly happy. She would be brilliant. She could soften even Jacks hardening heart. The first story I told her wasn't of my life, but of the marauders, how they stuck together to help Remus Lupin the werewolf and always trying to make people happy even in the darkest of times with their pranks.
Then of course came WW2, where everything changed.
I remember when Jack left.
Helen whispered, hugging him close, army uniform wrapped tight around his body. I can't say I was proud, I'd seen what war was like, if they didn't have soldiers there would be nobody to fight, nobody to die. Jack turned to Peter first, the 13 year old stood tall, shoulders back, staring up at him with adoration and pride.
"Peter, keep the girls safe for me, your the man of the house now."
Okay that hurt a bit, but then never been that close to Jack.
Peter nodded tearfully, Jack smiled down at him with his own pride.
"I love you"
The blonde murmured hugging the tall mans waist.
Jack pulled away and turned to Susan, taking his hands in hers.
"Your incredibly intelligent Susan, don't let this war stop you becoming amazing"
I raised an eyebrow. Could he not see his other children were intelligent also? I let it slide as he turned to Edmund.
"Edmund, you be good for Mummy and Peter now. And Listen to Harrison"
Although I saw It, Ed never had, he adored the man, I dread the day he realises the truth. Edmund nodded his head rapidly and hugged him tightly. No prideful smile for your youngest son then? Ed saw that, I watched him glancing at Pete and Su then at Jack, back and forth for a moment, I saw the flash of hurt and anger cross his face.
"Lucy just carry on being amazing, and don't forget me in your prayers"
She nodded crying and leaping into his arms.
Ed broke from the line they were stood in and crossed to where I was stood opposite them, Helen only a few feet away. Immediately I pulled him into a hug, lifting him from the ground and kissing his cheek softly. Jack saw none of this. However Peter did, he was watching like a hawk.
As Jack turned to me Peter strode forward
"Edmund come stand back in line so Harrison can say goodbye to dad"
He commanded. I almost spoke up but I saw Jack looking at Edmund expectantly. I set him down with a kiss to his head as Peter dragged him off.
"I hope to see you on the battlefield one day Harrison. God knows how long this will last, especially after the last war."
"You know my views on War"
I replied sharply, frowning as he clapped my shoulder.
"But for your country you should fight. We are innocent in this, the Germans plan to attack, we must defend"
"What has my country ever done to warrant me to fight for it"
I snapped back, Jack turned away with a shake of his head as the taxi came to pick him up.
"You must understand; Nobody is innocent in war"
I called after him. Jack didn't turn back.
Not long after we were evacuated.
Something had changed in all of them when they started attending boarding school. I was there to help them of course, much more acquainted to that lifestyle. Peter was just as popular as ever yet increasingly self righteous, however I don't think he realised. I remember after we were evacuated Lucy was 'making up' an imaginary game in the wardrobe and Ed was 'just playing along' that Edmund made Lucy cry (again) and that made Peter start to yell. Ed then yelled "You think your dad but your not!" and ran off. I saw the way Pete literally recoiled in shock. I think that was the first time he might have started to think before he spoke. Of course his later actions weren't any better though.
What Pete never truly realised is that he failed to listen. I found them countless times outside the headmasters office, Pete yelling at Ed for fighting and because Pete wasn't listening to him, Ed just yelled insults back. Ed's 'fighting' was more like bullying. I've stepped in multiple times to stop Ed getting beaten up.
Speaking of Lucy's game, that's where Narnia came in. The world in the Wardrobe.
"To the Eastern Seas, Queen Lucy the Valiant"
No truer word ever spoken, she is so Valiant.
"To the Great Western Wood, King Edmund the Just"
Correct in so many ways.
"To the Radiant Southern Sun, Queen Susan the Gentle"
Can this Lion see the future?
"To the Clear Northern Sky, High King Peter the Magnificent"
Peter truly can be magnificent, he just had to grow up first.
"And from the Deep Magic beneath, High King Hadrian the Arcane"
I stared into Aslan's golden eyes as the crown was placed upon my head. I saw the confused looks and smiled. Harrison may be my name in this life and I may always try to go by Harry, but Hadrian is the name my parents gave me. Hadrian Salazar Potter.
Weren't you a naughty boy Dumbledore, changing my name on a fake birth certificate to Harold James Potter. What Dumbledore didn't know was that James was actually my godfather and that Severus Snape was my father, because James couldn't have children. Still I took on the name Potter. Something else Dumbledore missed was that Severus was James' younger twin taken at birth. All the bullying that happened wasn't real, it was all fake.
Don't you just Love plot twists. They complicate my life beautifully.
Our reign was good. Mostly.
There was one year, in the fifteen we ruled that wen't wrong.
"Are you mad! She only wants you for the title and money!"
Peter swung round, golden crown on his head, glaring at his younger brother.
"Don't talk about things you don't understand Edmund!"
He growled, I stepped out of the shadows.
"You don't give them enough credit Peter. They all know exactly what they're talking about. She isn't good for you"
I kept my voice cold, my face expressionless. Susan and Lucy had come to me when there pleading hadn't worked.
"This has nothing to do with you! I am the High King, I don't have to listen to any of you!"
All three of his younger siblings recoiled, hurt expressions on their faces.
"You forget yourself Peter. We are all equal, Aslan made it so. And if that is not enough, I am also a High King. You need to calm down"
Peter glared at me, hand tightening on his sword.
"How dare you tell me to calm down! You aren't my family! You said yourself you aren't really our brother!"
Silence fell. I wont pretend that didn't hurt.
"So either You leave. Or I will."
Susan and Lucy gasped, tears immediately springing to the younger of the two's eyes. Swallowing back any emotion from even my eyes, I stared at each of them, from Peter's angry face, to Susan and Lucy's pained faces, torn between us, to Edmund's horrified face. Peter had been an amazing brother over the years, but that girl changed him.
I refused to split up this family, I refused to put them in any more pain, I can't keep hurting people. And throughout all my lives, I've done a lot of that. I could see it in their eyes, they would never choose between us, they wouldn't want me if they knew everything I've done in my many lives. I should be the one to go.
"It's okay, Peter's right, I do have a family beyond the living. I can't let you get hurt anymore because of me."
With a flick of my hand my trunk flew into my hand making them jump in surprise. I rarely used magic in this life. Anything precious was tucked away inside it, everything else I left, encase they needed it. I left my crown on my bedside table.
Turning away from Peter I strode forward towards Ed.
"Don't touch him"
Peter growled. I ignored him reaching out and running a hand through his hair. Ed stared up at me, eyes suspiciously bright. I kissed his forehead, squeezing his shoulder and stroking his cheek one last time.
Lucy let out a sob and ran at me, hugging me tightly.
"It'll be okay Lu" I murmured pulling back to kiss Susan on the cheek, she cupped my face, understanding and remorse in her eyes.
With another flick of my hand, I summoned my two swords, ones that I forged myself, ones that had only been seen by two people; Edmund and General Oreius. They slid into holsters on my back, my cloak covering them.
"I'll see you around?"
Ed asked suddenly, eyes pleading. With an unnoticeable twitch of my wrist, I left a letter on each of their pillows. My friends used to call me a pessimist, I just like to be prepared for the worst.
"No, I don't think you will"
I murmured, giving his hand one last squeeze before pulling away and walking down the corridor.
I saw them a year later, they were searching for something.
I saw Phillip first, well, the horse saw me first. I quickly motioned for him to stay quiet, I was perched in one of the trees getting ready to hunt, but not for food.
General Oreius saw me next, eyes widening in shock. I flashed him a quick smile before my focus switched. My prey was coming, charging through the tree's towards the kings. They didn't even have time to draw their swords. I pulled my hood up and leapt from the tree, plunging my dagger into the mans head before he could even look up.
"Who are you?"
It was neither grateful nor angry, just cautious. I paused, Peter's voice stopping me.
"That depends who you ask, High King."
I changed my voice with ease, making it much deeper and unrecognisable. Out of the corner of my eye Peter flinched.
"My older brother is the High King. Your sources are wrong"
"Last I heard you didn't have an older brother."
"You heard wrong"
"No I don't think I did."
"Who are you?"
Peter asked once more, the two kings jumping down from their horses.
"That Is a deep question High King, I am many people yet I am only one at heart."
A sharp intake of breath to my left signalled Edmund had figured out who it was. He stepped forward ignoring Peter's warnings and reached up, slowly pulling down my hood.
He traced the new scars on my face, staring into my emerald eyes. I caught his hand in mine, closing my eyes. A chocked moan escaped his lips and he hugged me tightly, burying his head in my shoulder. Oreius disappeared as the girls rode forward, gasps escaping their lips.
They leapt down, running towards me, smiles on their faces. They barrelled into me, hugging me hard.
"Hadrian Salazar Potter"
I stiffened, the others pulled away staring worriedly between us.
"I don't care If I'm threatening to kill you, Don't Ever Leave Again"
He snarled striding forwards and wrapping his arms around my waist. I smiled crookedly.
"Maybe my sources did get it wrong after all"
"Yes they fucking did get it wrong, you should fire them" Peter mumbled into my ear.
What none of us knew was that in two years that day we would leave Narnia back through the wardrobe. We didn't know Tumnus was going to propose to Lucy and Ed didn't know I was going to propose to him. Pete and I agreed to never tell them, It would break them. Susan had the problem of keeping boys away, not leaving them.
It was hard for them to adjust. Not for me, I did it once before, went from a royal in one life to a nobody in the next. Of course we went to Narnia again, unlike the others I had no doubts.
I think, Pete, Ed and I might have gotten slightly overprotective when Caspian took a liking to Susan. She was so pissed at us when she found us interrogating him about his intentions.
Pete and Ed would kill me if they knew I'd given Su and Caspian a way to keep in contact with each other coughcoughMagicalMirrorcoughcough.
Now though I wonder if Aslan allowed that, if he could have stopped me from doing that?
I got a letter from Ed and Lu whilst they were away at Aunt Alberta's explaining they had been in Narnia for the last time. Then I got a letter from Pete saying he was travelling to Alberta's to check on them. Su sent me a letter amusingly complaining about America and Helen and Jack trying to get her a boyfriend.
Where was I?
Exactly where I never wanted to be again.
In France. Fighting in World War Two.
Lets just say they forced me.
Yet somehow I found myself in Narnia once more.
Gun shots echoed, tanks rolled past me and soldiers fell. Fuck. They needed trenches again.
I quickly took cover behind one of the advancing tanks as more boats landed. I could feel blood trickling down my face from near misses, sand and dirt covering my body.
Suddenly I was flying, hitting the water with a sharp crack, ears ringing, gun flying from my hands. I tried to swim as my body sank, lower and lower, my arms struggled to pull me up, my right lg wasn't moving, it wasn't kicking. My eyesight was dizzy, I was suffocating.
The currents dragged me down further, I panicked coming into contact with a bloody sinking body, I yelled out, air escaping my lungs, water spilling into my mouth, I clawed at my neck with fear and panic, still unable to hear.
Then strong arms wrapped around my body, pulling up to the surface, saving me from death that I knew was always inevitable.
I coughed, expelling water from my lungs, body laying weakly on wood, hard familiar wood. Gasping for breath I rolled onto my back, squinting up at the fuzzy faces.
"Harry? Harry? Harry?""
I struggled to sit up, breathing deeply, my head swimming.
I panted, running a hand through my hair tiredly. Only then did I realise I was on a small rowing boat.
"Lions Mane Harry! How did you get here? Why didn't you swim?"
"Son Of Spirit you should not be here"
The low rumble of Aslan made us jump. I immediately struggled into a bow.
"Relax King Caspian, King Hadrian"
Aslan grumbled amused.
"Aslan, please don't send me back, I can't do it again"
For the first time in about eight Lives, I begged, on my knees, sodden and hurt, I begged.
"Harry, You must go back, so many people need you, young Queen Susan needs you to help her believe, King Edmund needs you; Love is a strong type of magic Harry, I believe you know that. Why are you so afraid to Love him in your country and not here?"
Aslan already knew, I could tell, but he needed me to realise the truth.
"Because I've loved in my country before, It hurt, even though all were never the right people it didn't make it hurt any less. Aslan, I don't wan't to hurt anymore."
His golden eyes smiled down at me.
"You have seen so much young one. And you have more to come. But for now Shield Of Spirits, Prince Of Protection, Consul Of Secrets, you must go on living. Son of Adam it's time for you to return. I am always with you child, do you know who I am in your world?"
"Of course, your J-"
"Then I am always with you"
For the first time in months I gave a genuine smile.
It was on the Normandy coast, Omaha beach.
It was brutal. I wasn't even supposed to be there, I should have been fighting with the Englishmen on Sword beach or Gold beach. But I made it out alive, I got home two weeks after Helen, Jack and Su got back from America and a week after Pete, Ed and Lu got back from Alberta's.
I remember the rain pouring down, I was sodden once more before I could even see the house, with no money to get a taxi I walked. It wasn't too far. I could see the lights on and the fire crackling in the fireplace. For once it truly looked like home. Jack came to the door, opening it with the intentions of telling whoever it was to go away, I could tell. He stopped, jaw slack, eyes wide.
"I knew I didn't look good but surly I don't look that bad"
I joked, breaking him from his stupor. He surprised me next, by pulling me into a bone crushing hug that could have rivalled Molly Weasley. I flinched and winced but he ignored it. Then he yanked me inside, out of the rain with a yell to Helen. She came hurrying out of the kitchen and stopped in shock, I saw the pile of newspapers on the side and realised they must have been checking for my name and number. To make sure I wasn't dead.
She cried out and ran forwards pulling me into another tight hug, I winced again, my body tired, sore and injured.
"Oh My God!"
Susan was the first down, eyes wide taking in my appearance. I guess I did look that bad. She stepped forward and cupped my face, staring into my eyes, looking for any sign of pain. Seconds later she kissed my cheek and wrapped me in a light hug. I smiled weakly, hands shaking, adrenaline and energy finally wearing out.
Peter appeared next, rather like Susan he grabbed my shoulder and stared me down, checking me over before hugging me, not too tight. I found myself leaning against him, feeling drained. He quickly wrapped an arm around my waist and lead me into the living room. I sunk into the sofa with a content sigh and half grimace.
Lucy ran forwards, she looked slightly lost without her cordial but like her siblings checked me over anyway. Susan wrapped her in a hug before she could squeeze me tightly.
Then Ed came down, silently like always, appearing in the doorway, slightly taller than before but no less attractive. He swept forwards, crouching in front of me, taking my hands in his and staring deep into my eyes. I leaned forward and tipped my head, our foreheads touching, resting together, sharing a private moment. The others looked away.
I remember the rest of the night being mostly hazy. But I do remember waking up with all four of them on my bed, protecting me from all sides. I smiled.
When we died in the train crash in 1949 we awoke in Aslan's country.
And I saw them all once again. I think I knew from the beginning what Aslan's country meant, I think I knew I would see my family. I guess maybe I didn't wan't to die.
But Death gave me an offer. I had one life left before I had to make my decisive, stay Master of Death or pass it on. My 13th life. He offered to allow a small group to come back with me, with all their memories intact. And with their permission I accepted.
Edmund Pevensie, Luna Lovegood, Ron Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Theodore Nott, Severus Snape, Peter Pevensie and Caspian.
So time to begin my thirteenth life.
Who would I become this time?