Chapter 1: Wake
“Are you awake, princess?”
Oh… god. My thoughts spin back to me in a haze, and I whimper as I wake up in our bed. It’s dark, but the TV flickers with another replay of The Lion King and makes my eyes pop painfully. I try to sit up, but my arms are too weak, and I stay limp in the pink and gray pillows. Help me… help me…
The mattress shifts as daddy crawls into bed with me, naked, smiling at my blank stare. He brushes my hair from my face and coos when I pant in fear. His black hair is drawn back in a bun, concealing his ears he’s so insecure about, and he has bite marks from me all along his shoulders. He lies beside me and strokes my cheek with his long, thick fingers.
“It’s the middle of the night,” he coos. “You seem so restless. Dinner not settling well?”
He kisses my neck with soft, hungry lips, and skates his hand down over my thigh to the hem of my panties. He whispers in my ear as he slips his fingers between my thighs and gently strokes my slit. I whimper and struggle against the rope binding my wrists together, and breathe heavily into the tie wrapped around my head.
“My good girl.” Daddy kisses my forehead and tugs my panties down past my knees. “Do you feel sick? Or do you need daddy to make you sleepy again?”
The air conditioner whirs as he rolls on top of me, spreading my legs with his knees. He pulls the gag from my mouth up over my eyes and I can hardly take a breath before I feel the weeping head of his cock on my lips. I open up and let him in like I’m supposed to, and he groans. At least he’s gentle.
Daddy’s cock slides in and out of my waiting mouth. He cups my cheek and pants while he moves and I close my eyes behind the blindfold. He stretches my lips and drool slides down the corner of my mouth. I just wait. I suck and slobber like I should.
“You’ll have a full belly soon,” he coos. “Then it’s back to bed.”
He comes a minute later with grunts and groans. I swallow his load and suck the spend from the tip. It’s supposed to be ‘food.’ Daddy kisses my cheeks while I swallow the salty mess and nuzzles under my jaw. He thinks he loves me.
“All full?” he asks. “Is your belly better?”
I nod stiffly. He hums and kisses my neck, then slips out of bed to go to the closet. My heart pounds when I hear a crinkle and feel him pull my panties off completely. The bed shifts, and he lifts my butt.
Daddy hums. “I don’t want you to have an accident, princess. Wake me up if you need help, okay?”
I’m not sure how much time has passed. I heave a sob as he straps an actual diaper around me, like I’m a fucking infant, and he gasps and kisses my face again. He pretends he feels bad while he infantilizes me in varying humiliating ways. He reaches into the nightstand drawer and worms a pacifier into my mouth. I sob harder.
I just wanted help with my student loans. Others girls did it. Other girls found guys to help. Why did I find the one fucking psychopath?
Chapter 2: Somnolence
less exciting chapter but necessary
YOU MUST SUBMIT PAYMENT BEFORE THE BEGINNING OF THE SEMESTER OR YOUR COURSES WILL BE DROPPED.
Year two of college has begun, and I’m up shit creek without a paddle. I’ve applied for every scholarship I can, from financial hardship to STEM for women, and it’s not enough. I groan and throw the letter on the floor of my tiny dorm room. I’m screwed. I have nowhere to live this summer and nowhere to live next year.
A year of base classes for a mechanical engineering degree won’t do squat. Plus, I want to be a mechanical engineer. I need about $16,000 to make that happen, and I’ve exhausted all my resources. Motherfucker. Being broke, smart, and female isn’t enough. I can’t even take out loans because I don’t have a co-signer.
My best friend Rose has been texting me all kinds of ideas, like selling a kidney or donating eggs. It’s not feasible. I’m screwed. I was accepted into MIT based on my grades and volunteer work and now they’ll boot me out because I’m too broke at nineteen.
I flop back on my bed and roll around. “Ugh—why me?!”
My dorm room is decked out with Christmas lights and posters and inside jokes, and now I’ll never be back. I’m so angry. I worked so hard to get here from Unkar Plutt’s foster home of torture and now…
I can’t think about anything else for the next week. I have a two weeks until the semester ends, and two weeks to figure out what I’m going to do. I lost my part time job, so I’m living with Rose and her sister Paige until August, but then… I don’t want to be a burden. I need a plan. I need an escape.
Rose spins in my computer chair one night, munching on a burrito. “Okay, but—sugar daddies.”
We’re both kind of drunk. I burst out laughing, snorting wine, and she laughs, too. We have matching footie pajamas. We’re real best friends.
“Fuck you,” I snort.
“Google, girl.” She chews with her mouth open. “They’ll send you money and shit. For real.”
Jessika Pava comes in totally shitfaced and the three of us go online to find me a sugar daddy. I’m about seventy percent kidding. We giggle and send messages, somehow avoiding giving my personal information, and go back to drinking when we’re done. I pass out in bed between the two of them.
College is a blast, honestly. I’m good at math, Rose helps me with English, and I play lacrosse. I think about how happy it makes me as I wake up, groggy, to my phone vibrating. My friends are gone and I’m left to deal with the aftermath of creeping online.
Most of the emails are just that—creepy—and I delete the bulk of them. But one catches my eye near the end, and I open it up to read the response.
KyloRen: Hello. How are you?
I’m curious. I click on his profile, squinting through my hangover, and scroll through. He’s thirty-two, six three, two-hundred some pounds, athletic, and owns his own company. I frown when I see he hasn’t answered most of the bullshit questions, like ‘what’s your favorite color.’ Straight-shooter, maybe.
Sunrae2187: hi there! i’m okay. nice to meet you.
Whatever. Might as well try. I yawn and slip out of bed to go shower down the hall and dress for class. I’m basically studying for finals now.
When I come back, I have a message. I dry my hair while I read it and respond.
KyloRen: Likewise. You’re nineteen?
Sunrae2187: yep. going into my second year of college, that i can’t afford :V sucks to be me
While I dress in white short shorts and a loose blue blouse, I see another message pop up. It’s a little addicting. The guy is probably a nut job.
KyloRen: Oh, I wouldn’t say that. We may be able to work something out in that regard. Go to your classes and we’ll talk later.
I’m tempted to say ‘sure thing, daddy,’ just to see if he can take a joke, but I reply with an ‘okie dokie’ instead. I finish putting my hair up in three buns, spritz on perfume, and head off to public speaking.
It’s an easy class for me. I’m comfortable in a crowd and in front of people. I strut to the front of the room to give my last speech of the semester, a five minute argument about why there should be free pads and tampons in all public bathrooms. The professor dozes off during some of the other speeches, but I keep my voice loud to make sure he’s awake for mine.
My only other class is chemistry at noon so I have a few hours to kill. I wander to the library to study for my finals and alternate texting Rose, Jess, and my other friend Kaydel. Jess is a junior and captain of my lacrosse team, but Rose and Kaydel are freshmen, too. Rose plays volleyball, which is a little lame, but I love her anyway. Kaydel’s more of a debate team person. I like smacking people with my lacrosse stick.
It’s cool and quiet in the library. I walk downstairs to the lounge and grab a ham sandwich and an iced tea to munch on while I go over pulleys and levers and shit. Paige is an electrical engineer, so she helps me study when I have a big test. She’s not so great at math, but I’m a math whiz.
I open my binder and read for five minutes before I’m too bored to continue. I’ll do fine. I’m a good test taker. I munch on my sandwich and message the stranger to see what he’s up too.
Sunrae2187: hey i’m on a break until noon. how does this whole thing work, anyway? am I supposed to be a virgin?
The chat says he’s typing. I sip my tea and snort when Rose offers to get male strippers for my twentieth birthday coming up. Kaydel and Jess are going back home, and Paige has to take Rose on some trip with their old foster parents. I’ll be all alone. Woe is me.
KyloRen: Of course not. For now, all I ask is that you keep me up to date on your day. If you behave, I’ll send you gifts. We don’t need to exchange pictures or anything like that at this stage. I work in healthcare, so I’m busy most of the day and may not respond.
KyloRen: Oh—and call me daddy or sir. Either works. I’m going to call you princess or sweetheart. Whatever I feel like.
I chew my nails for a minute before I reply. Clearly he’s done this a few times before and knows what he wants from me. I can send messages. That’s easy.
Sunrae2187: okay… sir. and not to be rude, but… you can help me pay for school, right?
KyloRen: Yes. I’ll send proof if this seems like it will work out for both of us.
Okay, fair enough. I apologize again and send him a message about what I’m eating and studying. From the way he talks, I assume he’s a doctor or surgeon. Of course, he could also be an eighty-year-old crackhead with a smart phone. The wonders of the internet.
Rose meets me in the library and we study for a bit longer before heading to chem. I want to tell her I’m talking to one of the guys, but I think it was supposed to be a joke. If she knows I’m taking it seriously she might get protective and mad. I’ll tell her if things work out with him.
“We’re having your party a few days before we leave,” Rose says while we walk. “You want red velvet cake, right?”
“Cupcakes are good.” I groan, leaning my head back. “Maybe I’ll find a job and try to pay for school that way. Will they let me pay as I earn?”
Rose hugs me from the side. “Don’t worry, Paige is still pulling strings where she can.”
“I know. Thank you.” I hug her back.
We do some review in chemistry for an hour. The professor cuts us loose a little after one and we go have lunch in the cafeteria. I wolf down a burger and the half of Rose’s she doesn’t eat, then pick at her scraps when she’s distracted by her phone. I’m a grubber. It’s a learned behavior.
Oh—shit. I remember to message… ‘daddy’ and let him know what I’m eating. I don’t use Rose’s real name. I’m not doing anything besides chatting until he proves he’s legit. He doesn’t answer.
We go to the gym with Jess, who tries to drag Kaydel to no avail. Jessika looks every bit the gym rat she is in her matching Nike outfit. Rose and I look like hobos in mismatched crap from Walmart. It’s kind of funny how we end up looking like Jess’s broke entourage when we go out.
“Connix needs to work out!” Jess gripes at the gym. “She sits around too much; it makes the blood pool in your legs, y’know!”
“We know!” Rose and I groan in unison.
I’m in the mood to run, so I go to the treadmills instead of weight training with the other two. If I can figure out how I’m going to pay for school, I need to sign up for a kickboxing class ASAP. Punching stuff is way more satisfying.
There’s a message from… Kylo, I guess, when I’m done. I shower quick before I read it while waiting in the lobby for the other two.
KyloRen: You shouldn’t eat things like that. It’s bad for you. Greens, please. Send pictures of your meals.
I scowl. Sunrae2187: excuse you, burgers are delicious.
KyloRen: Yes they are, but daddy is giving you instruction you should obey. Understood?
Sunrae2187: fine, i’ll eat rabbit food. >: (
KyloRen: That’s my good girl.
Eek. It gives me a thrill. I smirk and message him about how bad I can be when my two friends pop up. We go home together, exhausted and ready for a nap. Kylo messages me back when I get to the house.
KyloRen: I should hope not, princess—or you’ll be punished accordingly.
Chapter 3: Narcoleptic
cw: dubcon that kind of turns in noncon??
so this story in its very nature (with kidnapping and captivity) will have noncon. i'm going to add the tag next chapter or so when it actually happens. kind of figured everyone would understand that after the first chapter BUT i want to give people fair warning
The next week goes by faster than I thought it would, and I easily adjust to my weird role with Kylo. He doesn’t tell me his real name and I go by ‘Rae’ instead of the usual spelling of my name. I text him throughout the day and he usually answers me later on at night. I’ll send pictures of someone else’s salads to placate him and still stuff my face with greasy crap.
He sends me things, like a new iPad and laptop. I can’t believe it at first and thank him profusely, to which he just says ‘you’re welcome, princess.’ I have to hide them from Rose and the others, but I intend on telling them about my new ‘daddy’ when they come back from their trip.
When my finals are done and I’m packing up the rest of my stuff to bring back to Paige and Rose’s, I get another package in the mail. I stand outside the mail room in the basement of our dorms and open the mailer, frowning. What could it be now?
My eyes widen when I see the edges of hundred dollar bills. I quickly shove them back in the mailer and scurry into the bathroom to check, heart pounding. Holy shit. I leaf through and find he’s sent me $5000 even with a note in small, messy handwriting.
This should help a bit with school.
I’ve never seen so much money at once. I fan it out in my fingers and hold them up to the light to check for security marks. They’re real. Holy shit. Trembling, I take out my phone and message him through the website.
Sunrae2187: uh… i got your package. i feel like ‘thank you’ doesn’t even begin to cover it.
He’s busy and doesn’t answer right away. I fold up the mailer and stuff it in my bag before heading to the apartment. It’s only a short bus ride away. I keep checking for Kylo’s response the whole way and up two flights of stairs to the apartment. Most of my stuff is already moved in.
Rose is finishing up her finals and Paige is at work. I’m alone in our three bedroom with five grand in my backpack. That’s definitely enough to keep my place for next semester. I go in my bedroom to fan the money out on my bed and can’t help but squeal with excitement. This guy can actually help me, and all I’ve had to do is bullshit with him for a week!
He answers an hour later. I snatch up my phone and my pulse pounds in my ears.
KyloRen: It’s nothing, princess. I have more—whatever you need. But I know how you can thank me.
My palms sweat. I hope this isn’t the part where I have to start sending nudes. Is it worth it?
KyloRen: Meet me for dinner on your birthday.
Oh… well that’s easy. I shrug and agree, letting him know he’ll have to pick me up and I’m in Massachusetts. It’s safe to meet up in public.
KyloRen: Great, I’m in upstate New York. I can certainly drive. I’ll pick you up at six in a black Tesla.
Sunrae2187: so you are a doctor!
KyloRen: Of course I am. Why do you think I’m so controlling? Now clean your room and put the money in your bank account. I’ll send you what you’re expected to wear to dinner.
If he’s a doctor who drives a Tesla, he’s probably not a lunatic. I gather the money and head out to the bank to deposit it, then go back home and organize my bedroom. I send Kylo pictures when I’m done, and in one I sit on my bed in my stockings with my feet curved together. I’m so excited I can hardly breathe. This is easy and it’s actually kind of fun.
Paige comes home from work an hour later and teases me about finally cleaning my bedroom. I want to tell her about Kylo, but she’ll worry during the trip about us going out for dinner. I help her cook and when Rose comes home we all sit and chat at the dinner table. Paige has another possible lead on a scholarship and I agree to check it out.
Kylo’s already answered when I lock myself in my bedroom and check.
KyloRen: Very good, princess. Very good. No more pictures until we meet and I make sure you’re at least eighteen.
Oh… right. Oops.
Sunrae2187: oops!!! sorry daddy : (
KyloRen: It’s okay. Thank you for apologizing. Give me a local place where I can pick you up.
We agree to meet at a gas station about half a mile from my apartment. He knows my address but it’s safer to meet up in public.
It’s in another handful of days. He doesn’t mention sex, but I still shave and tweeze my eyebrows and buy a teeth whitener. I’m not sure if I should admit I’m a virgin or not. It could make him second guess everything, or he could be into it.
Kaydel and Jess head home for the summer and I see Paige and Rose off the day before my birthday. I’m so excited I can hardly sit still, so I message Kylo.
Sunrae2187: i am SO excited about tomorrow!! i don’t even know what to do with myself haha
KyloRen: Poor girl. Watch a nice movie and have some tea. Something animated and from Disney. What did you have to eat today?
Sunrae2187: um… waffles
KyloRen: With syrup?
I bite my lower lip and just send maybe.
KyloRen: I’ll have to punish you for that. You know syrup is bad for you. Now you’re all excited from the sugar and I’m not there to play with you and tire you out for a nap.
Holy shit. I laugh at how absurd it sounds reading something like that before I answer. He won’t like it if I laugh in his face in person.
Sunrae2187: i can always tire myself out
KyloRen: Only if I give you permission—which I am not. Watch your movie and drink chamomile. I expect you to take a nap this afternoon.
Hmph. He can’t control me that much. I put on Beauty & The Beast and make green tea before settling on the couch under a blanket. Obstinate, I wriggle down into the pillows and slip my fingertips under the hem of my panties. I haven’t had sex, but I’ve masturbated a few times.
It’s hard to get off with a Disney movie playing, so I go on the website I usually use and watch on my phone. The doorbell rings downstairs—someone’s dropping off a package. I ignore it and stifle my moans as I roll my fingers around my clit the way I like. Pressure builds and I push two fingers inside myself as I get closer and closer.
A message pops up from an unknown number.
You’re playing right now, aren’t you?
I stare at it for a minute before responding. kylo?
Daddy asked you a question. Are you playing? The package arrived and you didn’t sign for it. Go sign. Now.
The doorbell peals. I jump up and quickly wash my hands before running downstairs to sign for the package. The delivery guy looks irritated as he hands off my outfit from Kylo. He’s watching the tracking that close? Wow.
I text Kylo. got it! sorry daddy…
I’m sorry too, little one. Now I have to punish you.
When I open the package, I find a sheer black dress, red ballet flats, and a matching black set with a bra and panties. How does he know my size?
My phone vibrates. Wear your hair in a braid. No jewelry. No lotion or perfume. I’ll supply those things. Now go back to your movie and finish playing, naughty girl.
Somehow I’m even more turned on. I go back to the couch and resume where I left off, stroking and whimpering until I climax with a quiet moan. I’m used to keeping my voice down.
It’s hard to sleep that night. I text Kylo about it, not even wondering about how he got my number. He answers immediately.
Excited, sweetheart? I wish I could give you some pointers, but I don’t know how old you really are. We’ll see tomorrow.
Ugh. I toss and turn for a while longer before I give in and masturbate again. In the middle of it I text Kylo with my free hand and just say i’m doing it again daddy : ), then snap a dark picture that only shows my knuckles straining my panties.
He takes a few minutes to answer. And I’m joining you.
Fuck. I don’t reply, just close my eyes and keep stroking along my front inner wall until I finish again to the thought of this mysterious man doing the same thing a few hundred miles away. It’s hot. Maybe I can actually commit to this.
He texts me Happy birthday, princess at midnight. I smile and thank him before I finally fall asleep.
Prepping for dinner is even more stressful than waiting for it. I make absolutely certain I braid my hair neat enough and double-check my armpits and legs for stubble and put on extra deodorant. I’m not used to wearing dresses and stuff so I laugh when I see myself in the mirror. I apply eyeliner and lip gloss and figure I look appropriate enough.
Around quarter to six, I shut off all the lights and head downstairs to wait at the gas station. I wobble in my heels but manage to get to the front door without snapping an ankle. Huffing, I tug it open.
A man stands on the porch with his hands in the pockets. He checks his silver watch before glancing at me and smiling. He’s tall—yes, very tall—and has shoulder-length black hair combed to the side. His face is long with a sloping jaw and dark, penetrating eyes. It’s Kylo. I can tell. I stare up at him.
He raises an eyebrow. “What? You thought I’d let you walk half a mile in heels?”
“I—I thought you’d be like… an eighty year old serial killer. I’m just really surprised.”
Kylo’s dark gaze rakes down my dress. “A good surprise, I hope.” Then he nods at my clutch. “You have an ID?”
I hurriedly grab my license and hand it over. Kylo offers his, which tells me his real name is Ben Solo. He nods and we give them back to each other. He’s thirty-four, I’m twenty. Eek.
Ben leads me down the stairs. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I’ll be swiftly unemployed if I go out on dates with underage girls.” He smirks down at me as we approach his Tesla. “Or masturbate with them.”
My cheeks flush with heat. I thank Ben when he opens the door for me to get in the car.
We go to a fancy Italian restaurant in Boston and sit near the window in a dark corner. Ben orders for me (lemon chicken with side salad) and he has the salmon. He picks my drink (iced tea) and has a glass of pinot noir for himself. I politely fan my napkin in my lap and we chat while we wait for our food. It feels like a normal date until the food comes.
Ben beckons me with his index finger. I slide around the booth with my plate and can’t help but giggle when he pulls me into his lap. Voices carry on around us, but no one can see. Ben coos in my hair and reaches around to cut up my chicken.
“Shh,” he murmurs, “this isn’t the time to be silly.”
I let him feed me piece by piece. He eats a bite of fish every once in a while and offers me some, chiding me when I gag. His huge hand slides over my thigh and squeezes after all the chicken is gone.
Our waiter comes back to refill our drinks. I feel high. I chew my salad and Ben noses along my neck. He lets me feed myself, sliding his palms down my bare thighs under my dress, and kisses me once.
“Do you like sitting in daddy’s lap?” he whispers.
I nod, stabbing a tomato. “I do. Thank you for feeding me.”
“You’re welcome. Nice full belly for my princess.” Ben nibbles my earlobe. “And what about dessert? Cake? Ice cream?” His hands slip inside my thighs. “Maybe something else?”
Then I squirm in his lap and feel hard warmth pressing into my panties. A sickening sense of being used prickles up my back as Ben softly strokes me outside my panties with one finger. He shifts his hips and rolls me across his erection with a sharp breath.
I hold the table. “…I like Reese’s?”
“Do you?” Ben touches me so lightly that it tickles. “Will you play in my lap if I buy you a candy bar?”
Our waiter comes back. He silently gathers our plates and doesn’t even offer Ben and me a second glance. Ben kisses my neck more intently than before, brushing his soft lips on my skin, and I cling to his outer thighs. My heart pounds. We’re in the middle of a restaurant. This is so bad.
I nod, though. “Yes, daddy.”
“Mm.” He worms a finger through the hem of my panties and gasps softly when he prods my entrance. “Oh, look at this—you’re already wet.” I whimper as he pushes his middle finger inside me. “Such a good girl I have.”
He pushes deeper. I bite down on my lower lip to keep from crying out and feel a pinch on my upper arm. Ben breathes in my ear and rubs me in his lap, back and forth, but somehow not making it obvious. He strokes along the spot inside me that makes me come the hardest and I dig my nails in his leg.
“What’s wrong?” he says in a low, ominous tone. “Am I making you nervous, Rey?” He grasps my hip tight. “You’re always so nervous—at home, at school. Everywhere I watch you, you always seem so tense.”
My heart skips a beat. I squirm in his lap, but feel a sudden stroke of dizziness when I move. Whimpering, I sag into Ben’s chest and paw at his wrist shifting between my thighs. People carry on around us, laughing and clinking glasses.
Ben kisses my temple. “Shh… it’s okay. You’re okay. This is going to help you relax, baby. Daddy’s here.” His lips wander across my neck. “We’re going home to take a nap after we’re done playing.”
“Please,” I croak, “I’m… I’ve never—”
“Ah, ah. I know. I know everything I need to know about you. Don’t make a fuss.” Ben traces his finger over my hip bone. “My little girl is still a virgin, so I’ll be nice and gentle. Now finish for daddy and go to sleep, please.”
I writhe against his chest and move my lips, but nothing comes out. My body reacts to him and pulses around his thick finger and I only make a couple rasping sounds as I climax. Ben kisses along my shoulder, slowly withdrawing his finger, and noisily sucks on it. The room and the sounds spin together and I pass out in his lap.
Chapter 4: Hypnagogic
yeah this is pretty fucked up right here
Sesame Street wakes me up in my own bed.
Disoriented, I whimper softly and struggle to open my eyes and look around. My head feels heavy and the low volume of the show echoes in my ringing ears. I’m on my back under the covers and I’m groggy and confused. What happened? Am I back home? It feels like I’m home.
I stretch my legs, toes curling, and realize I’m wearing a onesie that covers my feet. The room swells and spins as I lift the sheets and see my outfit is printed with unicorns and unbuttons down the front, with the last one between my legs. I squint and moan in confusion and feel something crinkle. Either I’m wearing a weird pad or…
Oh god. Trembling, I tug open the buttons near my crotch and choke when I see I’m in a diaper. I scramble with clumsy hands to get the outfit and the diaper off, squirming in bed, and the door opens.
Ben stands there with his hands in the pockets of his black slacks, charcoal gray sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He has his black hair drawn in a bun that conceals his ears. He smiles.
“What are you doing, naughty girl?” he coos.
I gape as he approaches, tall and imposing, and notice a raised rail along the edge of my bed. He leans across to fix the diaper and onesie while I can only whimper in protest and paw at his huge hands. Ben murmurs as he slips a hand under my butt and strokes back and forth.
“All clean—my good girl.” He frowns and cocks his head. “Such a little grump after your nap, though. Very fussy. Are you hungry?”
What the fuck? I shake my head, terrified, and struggle to resist the haze of whatever drug I’m on.
“I don’t want to do this,” I rasp. Tears well up in my eyes and I sob. “Please… you’re scaring me, Ben.”
He opens the nightstand next to my bed and produces a pink ball gag, like one I saw when I went in a sex store on a dare. I beg him to stop as he smiles and forces it between my teeth and around my head, then tightens the straps. He brushes my hair back with his long fingers while I claw at the bed and scream until saliva drools from my mouth.
Ben wipes the spittle with his thumb. “Don’t throw a tantrum, Rey. That’s not how we get what we want.”
I kick my weak legs and keep screaming. He sighs and takes out mitts that match the onesie and have horrible black straps. I’m too wasted to fight back as Ben hums and pushes my hands inside them. Oh god… oh god. Paige and Rose won’t be home for a week—does he know that? Is he going to kill me?
Ben smiles as he tugs open the buttons near the crotch of my onesie. “Let me help you relax.”
He rests a forearm on the rail and slips his fingers inside the diaper. I screw my eyes shut and scream again as he strokes through my folds, gently circling around my clit like he did at dinner. His dark eyes watch my face and he rests his jaw in his palm, sighing and smiling down at me squirming in discomfort. I push the mitts on his wrist writhing between my legs and turn my face towards the wall. Get away from me!
Sesame Street plays quietly in the background while I break down into sobs, body reacting to Ben’s touch. He dips two fingers inside me and uses the heel of his palm to rub my clit light enough that I roll my hips up into his hand. It’s far worse than the restaurant—I can’t get away and I don’t want it and I can’t help it.
Ben has a dreamy expression. “I won’t hurt you, sweetheart. I just want you to calm down.” He glances at my hips and hums. “I’m going to set you free from the burden of choice. You’ll learn to like it.”
I bite down hard on the gag and resist the blooming tension between my thighs. Ben is as patient as he is insane and he waits without batting an eye for me to lose the fight with my own body. It takes a long time and I sweat from exertion, but eventually I give in. My legs writhe in the sheets and I breathe hard on the gag, whimpering as my climax comes fast and intense. He leans over the bed to kiss my forehead while I ride out my orgasm, bucking my hips into his palm.
My head spins as I come down, panting and groaning. Ben kisses the ball of the gag and the corner of my mouth. He wipes away my saliva with his thumb and nuzzles my hair as I begin crying softly again.
“My poor baby,” he whispers against my scalp. “It’s okay—shh.” He straightens and offers me a sympathetic pout as he unbuttons his shirt. “I took a few days off work to help you settle in. I’ll be here whenever you need me.” His long fingers work through his belt buckle, making it clink. “Like right now.”
Ben lowers the rail and crawls into the bed beside me, still wearing his half-open shirt and dress pants. He pushes his black shoes off and murmurs while I cry and he pulls the covers over us. I’m so overwhelmed that I can’t even cry anymore, just hiccup as he gently gathers me in his arms and holds me against his broad chest. He’s warm… he smells like teakwood cologne.
One of his big hands cups the back of my head and he kisses the crown of my skull. “Much better. I’ll have to get you more binkies when I go out shopping. What else, what else…” Ben clicks his tongue, thinking. “Maybe I’ll just look around when I go.”
We lie there in silence for a long time. I resist my heavy eyelids, huffing into the gag, until Ben turns and opens the nightstand again. He rifles around and unclips the gag and I work my jaw before he turns to me again. I can’t see his face, but I do see the pink plastic of a pacifier in his long fingers. My eyes squeeze shut and I obediently open my mouth.
It’s relaxing and it shouldn’t be. I curl my tongue around the nipple, relieved to be free of the gag, and suck frantically when Ben tugs through the top row of buttons on my onesie. He slips a hand inside and strokes my nipple with his rough thumb, breathing in my hair. My brain buzzes with calm pleasure.
“I know you’re sleepy,” he murmurs. “Rest, princess.” He trails kisses down the side of my face, pausing to kiss the pacifier, and makes his way to my neck. His palm closes over my breast. “Perfect.”
I whimper, fisting my hands in the mitts as Ben slides lower in the bed. He gently tugs the onesie aside and whispers empty platitudes when I keep squirming nervously and struggle to escape the mitts. He kisses my nipple so softly I’m not sure that I feel it, then licks his lips and sighs as he draws the nub in his mouth.
My fingers arch into claws and I moan despite my terror. The pacifier almost falls out and Ben casually reaches up to readjust it with a small laugh. He strokes my cheek with his thumb a few times while I suck on the nub, and I close my eyes. I can’t help it—it feels good. He alternates suckling with his lips and tongue and I writhe beside him, sighing from pleasure and relaxation. I feel drunk.
We go on like that for a while. Ben switches to my other breast and suddenly takes off the mitts, casting them off the bed and moving closer. I cling to his bare chest when he moves back up, aligning his hips with mine, and he nuzzles my head.
“Now daddy is too excited to nap,” he whispers into my hair. “Let me show you how I fix it.”
He wraps his fingers around the back of my neck, resting his forehead on mine, and I watch him reach his other hand down his pants. He withdraws his cock, already hard and red and beading precum at the tip. It’s big, but I could tell that at dinner—and he’s tall and broad himself. I stare as his thumb drifts across the slit and smears his precum around the head. He huffs and groans.
“Does this make you nervous?” Ben asks, breathless. When I nod, so does he. “Mhm—it’s big, isn’t it? But it won’t hurt you. Just watch.”
Thank god. I hear a click above my head and see Ben squirt lube on his cock with a slight shiver. He drops the bottle and makes several long strokes from base to tip, groaning, and watches himself masturbate along with me. Warmth prickles up the back of my neck at the sight and slick sounds of each twist of his fist around his erection. Precum trickles out.
I’ve seen a penis before but I’ve never watched a guy jerking off. Ben quickens his pace as time wears on and I find myself still watching even though I can close my eyes. He grunts and thumbs the underside like he’s done it a thousand times. Why is he doing this? Any woman would jump at the chance to sleep with him—I would’ve—so what’s the point?
He squeezes my neck. “Why don’t you try, baby? I’ll help.”
Repulsed, I shake my head, but Ben rips a hand off his chest and tightens his hold on my neck. He praises me as he empties the bottle in my palm and guides my wrist down to his pulsing cock. His breath catches when my palm touches his hot skin and I curl my quivering fingers around his cock. The tips don’t touch on the other side.
“You’re such a good girl,” he whispers. “Squeeze tighter, please—and touch here.” He presses my fingertip to a bump under the head.
I do what I’m told. Ben chokes and wraps his arms around me in a hug, bucking his hips while I silently mimic his strokes. His cock stiffens even more and now he whimpers as more precum dribbles down my fingertips. The pacifier comes out and Ben kisses me hard, slipping his tongue in my mouth and grunting with the first pulse of his climax. My heart pounds.
He pushes me on my back with his sticky hand and takes over jerking off. I squeak before his mouth is on mine again and he tears through the onesie buttons.
“My dirty girl,” he manages in a groan, “so hungry for daddy’s cum. I’ll give it to you right where you want it. Our—oh, god—our little secret, princess.”
He pulls open the side of the diaper and my eyes widen as he shifts nearer, aiming his cock on my pussy. I scream ‘STOP!’ but Ben pins me by the throat and squeezes so I claw at his hand with both of mine, gasping. The hot head worms in my folds and he swears as he climaxes, rubbing the head along my slit and calling ‘oh, Christ!’ a couple times. He makes a couple more frantic thrusts and I feel ropes of sticky, warm semen spurt on my skin.
I scream as loud as I can while being choked. Ben heaves for air and almost collapses, but manages to keep up on his arm. He shushes me breathlessly and smears his cum all around between my legs, even dipping some inside me. I kick and cough, tears pricking my eyes. Holy shit—GET OFF ME!
Ben’s dark eyes watch my face. I can finally see him and he looks fucking elated. He smiles as he pops open the lube and drizzles more on my crotch. I want to puke but I can’t even breathe.
He tosses the bottle and carries on making my cunt a sticky mess. “What’s wrong? I just gave you what you wanted.” I shrink back, sobbing with his breath on my ear. “You think this is fucked up? You have to earn that money for school, Rey—so stop crying, or I’ll give you something to really fucking cry about.”
Ben gives me a wet, obnoxious kiss on the lips and closes the diaper. He smears the mixture of cum and lube down my face and laughs when I manage to bite his hand. I earn a retaliatory slap across the face that makes my head spin, and he threads his fingers through mine. Before I recover from the smack I feel something prod my lips.
“Lick daddy’s cock clean.” He tightens his grip on my hands until I wail. “This is your punishment for refusing. And don’t bite, or you’ll have a laxative for dinner.”
“Please!” I beg, sobbing hysterically. “I’m so sorry! I’m scared—I’ve never done any of this!” I shriek again, too terrified to do much else. “You’re HURTING ME!”
For a minute, Ben doesn’t speak. I can’t see him through the blur of tears, but his hold lets up on my hands. He releases and they throb with pain but I thank him over and over, anyway. Then he rises from the bed and fixes his pants and shirt, and the railing comes up with a loud click.
“Go to sleep,” he instructs coldly. “If I have to come in here and reprimand you, the same punishment applies.”
I nod, trembling, until he leaves the room. I’m left alone with him all over my face and vagina and I can’t do anything about it. I bite my salty lower lip until it bleeds and squeeze my eyes shut. Don’t cry… don’t scream… don’t make a sound…
Chapter 5: Delirium
so i hated the last chapter and rewrote the second half
sorry eeeeeee downsides of drunk writing
“Good morning, little love.”
The first thing I see is Ben looming over my bed, big hands clasped on the railing as he smiles down at me. He’s in a gray T-shirt and black sweats, dark hair in a messy bun, and he seems… tired. I moan and squirm. I’m still sticky from last night and I can’t get the disgusting diaper off.
Something pricks my upper arm. My head lolls to the side to catch Ben injecting me with medication, drawing more sobs from me. He coos and tosses the needle on the nightstand, then lowers the rail. I’m helpless to resist as he gathers me gently in his arms. I tremble, arms curled to my chest, head under his chin, shivering thighs open around his hips.
Ben kisses the top of my head. “You did so well last night. I didn’t hear a peep on the monitor.” He heaves a sigh into my hair. “I’m sorry I lost my temper. Let’s make today a better day, hm?”
The drugs kick in quick. Ben carries me to the bathroom and I hang limp in his arms, fighting to keep my eyes open. He smells nice—like aftershave and toothpaste.
It’s humid and warm in the bathroom and I hear dripping water. Ben carefully lays me on a blanket fanned across the cold tile and kneels between my thighs. He smiles as he pops open the onesie, extracting my arms as gently as he can, and I smile when he takes the fucking diaper off. Sick fuck.
He tosses it in the garbage and leans back on his heels to look down at my languid, naked body. I have enough strength to blink, but that’s about it. The drug lulls me into quiet obedience as Ben’s fingertips trail down my stomach.
“Beautiful,” he whispers. He brushes down to my slit and gazes at it. “Daddy loves you, princess.”
He peels off his shirt from the bottom hem up and stands to take off the rest of his clothes. He’s big: broad-shouldered, kind of pale, and riddled with small scars and moles. Ben carries me into the bathtub and murmurs as he lowers us into the hot water. It’s good—it’ll sear him off me.
I’m afraid to speak. I’m nestled between his thighs, water up to my shoulders, leaning against his hard chest, and he slowly kisses the top of my head. Maybe if I let him keep going I can wait it out until everyone comes home.
Ben hums contently and reaches behind him. A lid clicks and I hear fluid squirt. “Not a single accident yet from my princess.” The water ripples as he rubs a loofa on my back and whispers in my ear. “Does the diaper embarrass you, little one?”
“Y-yes.” My voice cracks and I heave a sob. “Please don’t make me wear it—please—”
“Shh… hush, hush. Don’t get excited.” He cleans my back in long strokes and trails languid kisses along my cheek and jaw. “My sweet Rey wants to be a big girl. I understand. But a big girl needs to learn how to obey her daddy before she can be rewarded.”
I cry softly while Ben washes me, too loaded on the drug and emotionally spent to play his game. He takes his time cleaning under my arms and behind my ears and drizzles water on my head to wash my hair. When he’s satisfied, the loofa slips between my thighs and rotates in gentle, pleasurable circles. My breath hitches.
He leans the side of his head on mine. “How does this feel?”
“Mhm. Good girl.” Ben cups my breast, thumbing my nipple. “Big girls can admit the truth—and say what they’re thinking. That’s why little girls can’t be trusted without a diaper. Do you understand?”
I nod quickly. Ben nods too and keeps up rubbing the loofa in tight circles on my clit, palming my tits with his other hand. I squirm and grab his wrist with one hand, and clutch his arm with the other. The tension prickles up my thighs the longer Ben keeps at it. I’m close. The water splashes as I kick my feet and moan.
“Are you going to come for me?” he coos.
“I—I think so.” I’m bucking my hips, rubbing his cock against my back.
“Mm. You’ve been so naughty today. Maybe I shouldn’t let you come.”
The urge to get off takes over everything else. I grumble and cling to Ben, redoubling my efforts to have an orgasm before he can stop me. He laughs and slips his hand away, but I wrap my arms around one of his and refuse to let go. My pussy pulses with want—I just want to come.
I cry, burying my face in his bicep. “Please don’t stop, daddy. Please?”
“Rey,” Ben says in a stern, deep voice, “what did I say about obedience?”
Maybe the drugs have me more emotional than usual. I tremble and sob as I let go of my kidnapper’s arm, all over trying to get off, and he murmurs ‘very good’ and kisses my temple. Ben drains the water and lifts me out of the tub, drying me and whispering about how I’m a good girl. My cunt throbs with want and I consider rubbing on his leg before he can pry me away.
He smiles as he dresses me in a pink nightgown that comes down to my knees. I sway on my feet, dizzy, and clutch his shoulders to step into a pair of white panties. Ben holds my hips and kisses just under my bellybutton through the thin fabric of the nightgown. I dig my nails into his shoulders and try to push my clit against his chin, drawing another laugh from him.
He stands, looming over me, and dresses himself in black slacks and a gray dress shirt. He loops a belt through his pants and puts on socks and shoes. I watch through lidded eyes, confused. Why is he putting clothes on? Is he leaving?
“This is your last warning about disobedience—then you’ll be punished.” He raises his eyebrows, rolling up his sleeves. “Understood?”
“Okay,” I mumble. I’m getting teary again. “It aches, daddy.”
Ben licks his lips, dark eyes searching mine, and he curls his long fingers around my jaw. His demeanor shifts from casual amusement to a hungry, predatory edge. I gaze up at him with watery eyes and my lower lip trembles in the most pathetic way possible. His hand curves around my cheek, thumb stroking the first tears that roll down.
“Please,” I whisper, sagging on the bathroom counter, “please…”
He smiles a bit. “Do you think you’ll get your way if you cry?”
I shake my head and my knees wobble. I’m about to fall over. “N-No. I just…”
Quivering, I grasp the front of his shirt and step up on his shiny black shoes with my bare feet. My hands slide down to hold his belt and I adjust my hips to his, tugging for friction. Ben drops his hand from my cheek and sighs, leaning forward slightly to place his hands on either side of me on the counter. He doesn’t say anything else, so I eagerly rub my throbbing clit on him, meeting with his hard cock. He doesn’t move.
I close my eyes and squeeze his belt. His wet hair drips on my shoulder and occasionally he makes a muffled grunt, but the only sound otherwise is my moaning and the squeak of my soles on his shoes. I smile despite myself as I get closer until my climax comes. Ben lets out a sharp breath. I squirm, gasping and struggling to get closer while it ebbs out, and bury my face in his chest.
The pressure and urgency fades. I’m left standing there catching my breath with a sick feeling in my stomach. Oh god. Gross.
Ben heaves a sigh in my ear. “I have a long way to go with you, Rey.”
He grabs my hair in a fist and twists, making me squeal and bow over the counter. He drags me from the bathroom to my bed, where he sits and yanks me stomach-down across his lap. I scramble to get away as Ben rips my panties down and hikes up my nightgown. I know what he’s about to do, and even the drug I’m on can’t keep me from shrieking.
His fingers tighten in my hair. “You were warned twice. Now you’ll be punished.”
The first slap is so hard that I can’t bite back a scream. Ben cups his hand over my mouth and squeezes to keep me in place, then cocks back and smacks my ass again. I’ve never been spanked before so I’m not prepared for how painful and humiliating it is. I scream into his palm until my chest hurts while he slaps me over and over again.
It ends long after what I can handle. Ben fixes my panties and I blubber hysterically, shaking like a leaf as he rights me in his lap. He wraps his huge arms around me, perching his chin on top of my head, and coos as he rocks back and forth. I wail until I can’t breathe, then sniffle and simper. Pain radiates all along the back of my thighs and my butt. His hands are so huge that he hit my pussy a few times—but maybe that was deliberate.
Ben kisses the top of my head. “I know… I know.” He sighs and pats my trembling thigh, calm and paternal. “Cry it out, little one. I don’t like hurting you, but you have to learn to do what you’re told. Pain is a good teacher.”
I break down into sobs again, shaking my head. “I don’t want to do this anymore! I’ll—I’ll pay you back and—”
“Oh, Rey—sweetheart.” Ben laughs and adjusts me so he can smile at my tear-streaked face. “You don’t have to pay me back a single penny. Do you know why?”
My crying slows a little. Really? He’s going to let me keep it? And leave? I sniff and shake my head, wringing his shirt in my hands. He wipes the tears from my cheeks with his thumb, slow and relaxed, and doesn’t answer for a minute. I catch his eye and we exchange a weird smile. Okay… then w—
Ben seizes my throat, still smiling as he clenches his jaw and strangles me. I cough and kick my feet, clawing at his hand, wheezing for air.
“Because I’m not going anywhere,” he whispers.
He shoves me off his lap to the floor. I roll on my back and scramble away as he rises to his feet, no longer smiling and somehow even taller. My fear turns into rage and I scream at him.
“Get out of my HOUSE!” I shriek. “Get OUT!”
“Shh. Relax, baby.” Ben opens the nightstand, withdrawing a pacifier, and starts toward me. “You’re overtired. Take your nook and come nap with daddy.”
I scream again and make a rush for the door. Ben laughs and watches me turn the handle, and I spill out into the—
No… there’s no carpet in the hallway. I frown, panting, but look over my shoulder and see Ben following me with the pacifier. Terrified, I skitter down the long hall on my hands and knees and realize this isn’t my fucking apartment. This isn’t my apartment. This isn’t my apartment.
“Where are you going, baby girl?” Ben calls.
My head spins as I clamber to my feet. I stumble along, brushing the wall with my fingertips, and walk out to a bigger room with a bunch of pictures of me plastered on the wall. Some are from months ago. Some are baby pictures. Some are me lying in bed. I stare and pant and claw at my hair. No—NO!
He steps up behind me. I look up with a sharp breath into his dark eyes and wide smile. He has a needle.
“Daddy wants to cuddle,” he croons.
Chapter 6: Nightmare
Ben looms in front of me, framed by my photos, most of them candids from random times throughout my life. I scramble back towards the opposite wall and take deep, terrified breaths through my mouth. Holy shit. Who is this fucking guy?
He smiles. “What? Surprised?” The needle waggles in his fingers. “I’ve been watching you for a long time, sweetheart. Too long.”
I scream and lash out as he comes closer. Ben murmurs as he restrains me, easily overpowering my weakened body to inject my upper arm with another sedative. He lets me slump to the floor and disposes the needle in a bin near the doorframe. I watch him circle the room and he smiles as he looks around at all the pictures of me.
“It’s been a bother collecting some of these,” he sighs, “but worth it. I couldn’t believe my luck when you signed up for that ridiculous website—I’d grown tired of watching and waiting, and it gave me an excuse to initiate contact.”
I crawl towards the door, reaching out, desperate to escape. Ben casually picks me up and kisses my temple as he adjusts me in his arms like a toddler. He carries me back down the hallway to my fake bedroom while I cry and reach over his shoulder for the door. Help me… someone help me…
The room feels ominous now. I’m horrified by the painstaking measures he took to make it look exactly like my apartment bedroom, down to chips in the paint and scuffs on the floor. He’s completely insane. That means he’s been in my apartment and he’s been stalking me for a long time. What was the point of recreating my apartment, anyway?
Ben lays my limp body under the sheets and worms the pacifier between my lips. His phone rings as he steps out of his shoes and he answers with an irritated ‘what?’ The room swims and I suck on the pacifier, woozy from the medication and terrified by what I just found.
“I’m on vacation!” Ben snaps. “Doctor Hux is acting medical director of pediatrics. Refer Miss Jones to him.” He’s quiet, then: “Audrey, I don’t care if she’s the Virgin Mary—I’m not coming off my vacation to supervise the birth.”
He hangs up the phone and tosses it on my nightstand, scowling from the call. Ben climbs into bed on top of me, nudging my thighs apart with his knee, and shushes my groggy whimpers of protest. I’m helpless to resist as he rests his weight on me and pulls the covers over us.
Ben whispers in my ear. “Shh—daddy’s here.” He rolls his hips, rubbing his cock against me. “You’re too little for sex, so we’ll just do this for now. Just rubbing… it feels good for both of us.”
His finger hooks through the back of the pacifier and gently bobs it in my mouth. He holds my cheeks, kissing along my throat, and uses his forearm to support some of his weight. I dig my heels into the mattress and sob around the pacifier, too weak and terrified to do much else. There’s no way out. I have no idea where I am or how far from home I might be. I’ll never see my friends again.
Ben breathes in my ear. “I’m so hard from spanking you. I love feeling your little body squirming around in my lap and listening to you scream. Gets me so fucking hard.” He kisses a trail to the corner of my mouth. “But you can’t fight back now, sleepy girl. You’re going to lie there nice and quiet for daddy and suck on your nook.”
His dark eyes watch raptly as I do just that without him forcing it. My brain finds some pleasure in the motion, maybe regressing back to infantile comforts, and Ben stares with his lips parted like it’s the hottest thing he’s ever seen. It’s so disturbing.
He’s a pediatrician, too—which is extra disgusting. I pray he’s never done anything to an actual kid, but I know odds are that he has. I shudder at the thought and he runs his long fingers through my hair, hushing me in a soft voice and planting kisses across my face. He keeps flexing his hips and the bed creaks.
“Does the nook help?” Ben whispers into my hair. “Does it make you feel safe?”
I nod and he nods back. He kisses the tip of my nose and brushes my cheek with broad strokes of his thumb, gazing into my lidded eyes.
Ben smiles and nuzzles our noses. “I’m not a pedophile, you know. I just love helplessness, and infants are entirely helpless.” His smile fades, dropping into a blank stare. “I’m going to make you utterly dependent on me, Rey.”
I’m too wasted from the drug to feel much emotion from his threat. His breathing picks up as time wears on, bed creaking, and he remembers to lift the rail at one point. Ben refuses to look away from my face until I writhe underneath him, eyes rolling with pleasure. He watches me suck hard on the pacifier as I come with fast, frantic breaths and bucking hips, and he swears.
It feels so good, even though it shouldn’t. I breathe hard as I come down and suck on the pacifier, bobbing it in and out, and Ben stares as he thrusts faster. He cups my cheek.
“Good girl,” he grunts, “good girl. Did that feel nice? Do you like playtime with daddy?”
“Mm,” I mumble.
“Daddy loves playing with you.” Ben kisses my temple hard, groaning in my hair. “You’re such a good girl. Daddy’s been so stressed recently—you’re making me feel so good. I’m going to cum on your tits, okay? I’m going to cum on your tits.”
He groans again and quickly leans up, working through his belt and unzipping his pants. He straddles my waist and clumsily grabs a bottle of lube. He squirts a generous amount on his throbbing cock and pumps fast, grunting and gasping.
“Feels so fucking good!” Ben pops out the pacifier. “Stick out your tongue, baby girl. Out. Oh god—I’m going to cum on your tongue. You can’t tell mommy, okay? This is our little secret. Our playtime.”
I whimper, recoiling, and he decides to take it farther. Ben seizes my head in both hands and forces his cock in my mouth, refusing to let up when I squeal and flail in shock. He pounds and tangles his fingers in my hair to fuck my mouth, spitting and swearing the short minute or two I blow him.
Then he moans and his hips still. I squeeze my eyes shut as Ben’s cock twitches in my mouth and squirts warm cum down my throat, giving me no choice but to swallow. He bobs my head in time with jerky thrusts with each stream that spurts out of him until the last bit drips from his head. He pants and trembles as he slips from of my mouth.
Ben rubs his face and laughs. “Holy shit. Christ that felt good.”
I scream. My mouth tastes like salt and sweat and lube and I want to puke. He frowns and coos, lying down beside me and drawing me to his chest like he doesn’t get why I’m upset. I sob hysterically and try to get away from him, but I’m still too fucked up by the injection.
“Hey, hey,” Ben whispers. “It’s okay, sweetheart. You did such a good job.” He reaches over my back and touches the pacifier to my lips. “Shh… take your binky. Shh.”
“NO!” I shriek. I pound feebly on his chest. “STOP! GET AWAY FROM ME!”
“Do you want another spanking?”
Heaving, I part my lips and take the pacifier. Ben smiles and watches me suck hard on it, and again I find it relaxing. I can’t. I have to resist him trying to infantilize me.
He kisses my forehead and sighs. “Good girl. You’ll learn. We’ll have a little nap then I’ll make you some dinner. How does that sound?”
I don’t respond. We fall asleep curled up together.
Ben wakes me with a kiss on the lips. The pacifier fell out while we were sleeping. He smiles into the kiss, chastely pecking a couple times, and whispers about how much he loves me in my ear. His huge hand takes my wrist and guides my hand to his cock, which reacts in a minute and stiffens against my palm. I hide my face under his chin while I jerk him off. Eventually, he slips his erection in my panties and gets off humping my wet slit.
“Oh fuck,” he whispers in my hair, “oh fuck!”
I wince when Ben twitches and comes all over the inner lining of my panties, soaking them. He gathers his cum and uses it at lube to make me climax on his soft cock, which in turn makes him hard again. I cling to his shoulders as he rolls over on top of me and eagerly thrusts with sharp, quick breaths.
“So close,” Ben grunts. “So close to fucking you. You want daddy’s cock inside you?”
“No?” He tugs my hair. “Why not? You don’t want daddy to fuck you?”
I remember his words from earlier and parrot them back. “I’m… I’m too little.”
He nods, sucking on my neck. “Fuck yes, you’re too little. Tiny fucking cunt—my little girl’s virgin cunt. I’m going to tear you open and fill you up with cum. Daddy will be your first and your last.”
“Please don’t!” I wail. “Please let me go!”
Ben grabs my jaw and squeezes. He smiles at me. “I like when you beg. Do you want me to cum on your face or down your throat?”
I’m too revolted to make a choice. Ben decides to force me to blow him again, but this time he isn’t as close to climaxing. He pushes my mouth back and forth, groaning, and I cling to his belt.
“I’m going to fill that sweet little belly with cum,” he whispers. “You won’t be hungry after you swallow my load. I’m all you need. Nice and full and ready for another nap with daddy with your nook.” His dark eyes flicker back with pleasure. “Fuck yes, Rey; suck the head. Lick underneath.”
Ben lets up on holding my head and I suck his cock without guidance. He touches my cheek and stares while I blow him, up until his cock pulses and suddenly climaxes. He swears, thrusting weakly, and I gag as I swallow his cum. It has the grossest texture ever, and the weirdest taste.
Then he pulls out of my mouth and flops down in bed beside me, panting. Ben groans and covers his face. I quiver like a leaf and try not to scream.
“God fucking damn, you give a good blow job.” His dark eyes flicker to me and he laughs. “Feels like you sucked my soul out through my cock. Are you full, little love? Ready for a nap?” He runs a hand through his hair, huffing. “I sure as hell am.”
“Please,” I rasp, “please…”
“Mm? What?” Ben smiles and turns on his side to kiss my temple, snuggling closer. “Is cum like a warm glass of milk? Making you drowsy?”
He blinks. “Oh—right.” The rail comes down and Ben rises from the bed, stretching until his joints crack. “I’ll bring you ginger ale and a grilled cheese with tomato soup. I know it’s your favorite.” He smiles over his shoulder, eerie. “I’ve watched you eat it so many times.”
I stare at him without saying a word. He winks and raises the railing, kisses my forehead, and leaves the bedroom. I lie there in silence for two minutes before I erupt into hysterical screaming.
Chapter 7: Sleep Paralysis
THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS GRAPHIC NONCON/RAPE. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Ben returns with my dinner a while later. It’s on a bamboo in-bed tray, complete with a red rose in a vase and a glass of ginger ale. He smiles at me lying prone in the bed and settles the tray over my hips as I sit up to eat. My stomach rumbles. I have no choice. I’m so goddamn hungry and thirsty.
He lowers the rail and sits on the bed near my feet while I eat. The grilled cheese has a combination of cheeses, along with bacon, and I wolf it down without touching the soup. Ben’s dark eyes watch me guzzle back the thick tomato soup and gurgle the whole glass of ginger ale, plus a bottle of water.
“Hungry girl,” he laughs. “Then again, you’ve had quite a work out.”
I redden but don’t speak. Ben smiles for a minute, equally silent, then moves the tray to the top of the dresser. He opens a drawer and pulls out a pink onesie and, to my horror, another diaper.
He idly picks through the clothes. “Big girls don’t cry, Rey. I heard you screaming when I left.”
“Please,” I rasp, struggling to cover my chest, “I’m begging you—Ben—”
The drawer slams shut. He turns, still smiling, and stands over me naked in bed. He sets the onesie and diaper aside to brush my hair back with one big hand. His hand slides under my jaw and he tugs my lower lip with his thumb, pressing the wet flesh inside. I squeeze my eyes shut.
“Beg me more,” Ben murmurs.
I let out a shaky breath. “Please don’t make me wear a diaper. It’s so… horrible.”
“And why is it horrible?”
“It makes me feel like—like a baby.” I keep my eyes shut and swallow hard, shuddering. “It feels dirty.”
He makes a soft sympathetic sound. “My poor baby girl. You just need to get used to it.” His thumb traces over the rise of my chin, fingers grazing along the edge of my neck. “I think I might make love to you while you wear it. How does that sound?”
I shake my head, sobbing as his fingers wrap around my throat. “Please don’t make me… please don’t make me… I’m begging you.”
“Shh. It’s okay, sweetheart. Daddy’s here.”
Ben’s fingers tighten like a vice. I gasp in shock, eyes flying open, and claw at his thick wrist. He smiles at me as he opens the diaper with one hand and shifts my hips with his free hand to position me in it. I’m too breathless to cry and he slams my head off the wall to stun me while he finishes. The Velcro closes and he leans across me to kiss my cheek.
“You’ll be okay,” he whispers. “You can still use the bathroom. I just like to see you in the diaper…” Ben smells my hair and I cry again. “Touch you in it.”
“I want to go home… I want to go home…”
“This is your home now. Just us.” He laughs near my ear and grasps my hips in his big hands. “We’re going to have so much fun together. I’m even going to take you virginity soon. Are you excited?”
I twist away from his kiss. “No—please don’t!”
“I’m going to,” Ben coos. “I’ll be gentle. You’ll be nice and wet before I take you. It’s going to feel good, princess.” He climbs in bed on top of me, sighing. “You’ll squeal and call me daddy—you’ll need me to help you come.”
But he leans back against the headboard and guides me between his legs so my back rests in his chest. I stare at the TV through tear-blurred eyes, trying not to look at the diaper. I’m otherwise naked, but Ben takes care of that. He leans forward to put the onesie on, starting at my feet, and kisses my temple when I help him.
His hands massage my upper arms, lips on my neck as I button up the front with quivering fingers. His breath tickles my skin and I rub my thighs together.
He slides his hands down to grip my outer thighs. “What’s happening here? Tingly?”
Ben kisses the side of my head. “Are you excited being so close to daddy?”
I swallow hard. “…Yes.”
He hums and reaches behind himself for a featureless throw pillow. It’s pushed in my hands and I stare at it blankly, unsure of what he wants. But Ben gently guides the pillow between my legs and I realize he wants to watch me hump it.
It’s not like I have a choice. I squeeze the pillow and begin rolling my hips against it, eager to get the creepy display over with. Ben rests his cheek on the side of my head and strokes my hair, sighing happily while he watches me.
At first I’m just squirming to give him a show, but it rubs just the right way. I shift my legs and whimper, and Ben tugs my blanket over our laps. He touches my hands with one of his.
“Are you masturbating right in front of daddy?” he whispers. “Naughty girl. We’re just watching Dora.” His deep voice murmurs in my ear. “Playing with yourself in my lap is very bad, Rey.”
“I’m—I’m sorry,” I mumble.
He noses in my hair. “Thank you for apologizing. You may continue, and we won’t tell mommy about this.”
The diaper makes bizarre, unsexy noises, but my desire to have an orgasm overwhelms everything else. I keep trying to push the pillow down hard but it isn’t enough friction, and Ben whispers that I should lie on top of it. He follows me as I lie flat and thrust against the pillow, moaning.
His body cages over mine and he meets my thrusts with his own. Ben pants as he grinds his cock against the diaper and I whine as my climax comes closer. He’s heavy and huge but it’s… kind of hot.
“Daddy,” I mewl, playing into his game, “what are you doing?”
“I’m just playing with you, sweetheart.” He grasps my hip, rubbing a thumb on my diaper. “Don’t you like when we play?”
I cling to the sheets. “Yes… Yes, daddy.”
Ben turns me on my back and throws the pillow away. He leans on his heels, running his hands through his hair, and his dark eyes rake down my body. I squirm nervously.
His throat bobs. “Good girl. Good girl.” He runs his fingertips down the center of my chest to my bellybutton. “How do you want to play? Do you want daddy to lie on top of you? We can come together that way. Or do you want another belly full of cum?”
“On top!” I blurt. I do not want his dick in my mouth again. “P-Please.”
Ben smiles and leans over the edge of the bed for the nightstand. I know what’s coming next.
But he takes out a neck tie instead. I can’t hide my surprise as he loops it around my head to cover my eyes. Blinded, I grope around the bed and my palm falls on the railing, which Ben gently moves. We’re lying the wrong way in the bed.
“On top, hm?” he murmurs. “We can do that.”
Ben wraps an arm under me to turn me the right way like he read my mind. He rummages around in the nightstand again and I hear metal clinking. My vague confusion turns to fear when he attaches one wrist to the rail and worms the pacifier in my mouth.
His naked, heavy body presses to mine. I whimper and kick my legs as Ben settles between them and he shushes me and murmurs ‘you’re okay’ over and over. He buries his face beside my head in the pillows and rips open a hole in the diaper with both hands. My whimpers shift into terrified squealing. He pins the pacifier in my mouth and uses the other hand to stroke my hair.
“We’re going to make love today,” Ben whispers. “Just relax.”
I yank hard on the handcuff and scream into the pacifier. He gently rolls his hips, bare cock against the diaper, and groans under his breath. Oh god—I claw at his back until I draw blood and keep kicking my feet while Ben humps me with unsettling grunts. He’s huge and heavy and I can’t get away.
He kisses my temple. “I know, sweetheart. I know. Just suck on your nook and everything will be okay.” His breath catches. “It’s—It’s going to be okay.”
My breathing comes in harsher puffs. It’s not going to be okay. It’s not.
Ben ignores my screaming and frantic kicking as he guides his cock to my entrance. He whispers, trying to calm me down, and I rake my nails down his back. My wrist hurts from yanking on the handcuff.
The head presses into my lips, no condom. I dig my heels into the mattress, desperate to escape, but there is no escape. Ben kisses my cheek as he slowly gathers wetness from my slit before he shoves himself inside me. I want to go home—I want to be anywhere but here, even if it means I’m dead.
Ben forces his way in. My breath catches from shock and pain but I can’t see a damn thing. I scream so hard my throat hurts.
“Oh—god,” he groans, “oh fuck. Quiet, baby girl. Shh—shh. Nice and gentle.”
The pacifier bobs in and out of my mouth as I suck hard to deal with the pain. Ben drives deeper, conquering each inch of unyielding flesh, ripping my body away from me. It’s a gentle assault, but that doesn’t make it nice or painless. He pins my scratching hand and grunts on my throat.
His cock is thick and hard. It takes a while for him to become fully seated inside me, filling me from entrance to cervix, using me to get off. He chases my lips for a kiss when I twist away and sloppily kisses the corner of my mouth with his hand on the diaper. It crinkles with each slow thrust.
Ben keeps nuzzling my cheek to keep my face aligned with his. “That’s right. That’s right. My baby girl, split open by daddy. You’re so… so fucking tight.” He huffs and thrusts faster. “Christ—too tight. You’re too tight. And you’ve got this fucking diaper on—so fucking hot. You fucking need me.”
I squirm, struggling to escape. I’m afraid to spit out the pacifier and he has his finger on it anyway. He’s fucking me now, no longer taking his time and being gentle. It’s like being skewered. I think of hot dogs on the bonfire from when I was a kid and squeeze my eyes shut. I’m a piece of meat. That’s all.
I’m so glad I can’t see his face and watch the pleasure flit across it. He grunts like a horse into my hair every few thrusts and I fight to keep myself silent. I won’t give him anything.
“My sweet baby girl,” Ben whispers, fucking me bodily into the mattress. “My sweet girl with such a tight cunt. Daddy loves you so much.” He leans back and pops out the pacifier. “Tell me how much you love daddy’s thick cock.”
“I—I love it,” I sob.
“You do, don’t you? Being filled up?” He takes a shuddering breath. “Oh, Christ. Oh fuck. Daddy’s going to come in you. You’re ready to take my load, aren’t you?”
I nod, fighting back tears. Ben nods and pounds harder until I cry out in pain—then I feel him come.
He splutters more curse words and pulses inside me. I’m nowhere near having an orgasm so I close my eyes and wince with each spastic thrust. He groans my name until his hips still with the last spurt.
The nightmare ends. Ben gulps for air on top of me and smatters kisses along my face. I sob, yanking on the handcuff, and he shushes me. He rolls his hips to move his cum around inside my cunt and refuses to get off me. I just keep crying. I can’t do anything else.
Chapter 8: Restless Legs
okay so this is tagged with NONCON so more NONCON
also lactation kink because why not
The monster falls asleep beside me.
One long arm is slung across my chest and his leg hikes over mine. His breath comes in slow, even tickles across my collarbone and he snores lightly in his sleep. I lie still beside him and don’t dare move an inch, even with his cum leaking out of me. I’m afraid of what he’ll do when he wakes.
I’m sore between my legs. I have the awful diaper on and one wrist still chained to the bedrail, restraining me beside Ben. Ben. I can’t believe he has a human name. The sensation of him lying on top of me and grunting in my ear is enough to turn my stomach. He isn’t human.
The monster stirs. He groans in his sleep, then blinks blearily and yawns into my skin. His long legs stretch until they crack and he grasps the bedrail to stretch out his arms. I quickly close my eyes to pretend I’m still asleep. Ben huffs and nuzzles under my jaw, kind of… whimpering?
He kisses my neck, tugging the blanket over us, and rolls over on top of me. His weight settles between my thighs and he kisses his way sloppily down to my nipple, mumbling to himself all the while. I yank on the handcuff.
“I’m hungry,” Ben sighs sleepily. He latches on to my nipple with his wet lips and cups under my breast, massaging rhythmically.
The cuff rattles as I yank desperately. “Stop—stop!”
He pins my free hand and keeps going. His tongue laps at my nipple, lips gently tugging like he’s trying to get milk out of me. I heave hysterically underneath him while he hums and sucks in time with the squeezing motions of his hand. The room is silent. Only the bed creaks a bit as Ben begins thrusting haphazardly against the mattress.
I catch sight of his eyes as he rolls my hips up so he can kneel between my thighs. Nothing seems to be looking back at me—in fact, it feels like he’s staring through me at something else. Ben leans back and licks his lips, reaching down to stroke his erection with a low groan. It’s already beading precum and as big as I remember.
“I have something nice for you,” he coos.
I watch him reach over for the dreaded night stand and choke on a sob. “You raped me!” I yank on the cuff and scream. “YOU RAPED ME!”
“I know I did.” Ben smiles as he comes back and frees my hand from the cuff. His black hair is mussed and makes his eerie smile take an a sickening, evil edge. “And I’m going to again, and again, and again.”
Now I’m free to move around the bed, but that’s what Ben wants. He pins me on my stomach, forearm across my shoulder blades like a steel bar, and clenches his fingers in my hair. I cry helplessly as he pops open a box near my ribs and ruts against the cum-stained diaper.
I want the fucking thing off of me already. His cum sticks to my thighs and my cunt. The last bath he gave me was awful, but I’ll gladly take it again to wash him away.
“Shh… shh…” He kisses my temple. The box tears open. “You’ll get used to it, sweetheart. You’ll get used to it.” His fingers slip in the hole in my diaper and rip it open toward my spine. “Now try to relax—I have a suppository for you.”
Something prods right where I don’t want it. My eyes widen and Ben shoves my head down when I scream as he worms a finger up my ass. I kick my feet and squeeze my eyes shut and just scream. My body heartily resists his advance, along with whatever thing he’s pushing inside.
It hurts… it hurts so much…
He laughs in my ear. “You throw a worse hissy fit than a toddler. I’ve given them medication the same way—” His finger finds its mark and he roots around a bit, groaning while I cry. “Of course, I don’t enjoy that. But this… this is nice.”
Ben draws his finger from my body and leans back for a minute. I bury my face in the mattress, maybe trying to catch my breath or maybe hoping I’ll suffocate and die. Why did he recreate my apartment? Why the fuck is he like this?
I’ll never know unless he stops treating me like a toy. He doesn’t see me as an equal he can talk or vent to. I’m literally an errant child to him, and my freak-outs just make him even worse. What if that’s what he wants? If I put up and shut up, will he get better or worse? Will he kill me?
I didn’t give him much feedback while he fucked me last night. Maybe I should keep quiet.
Ben lowers the bedrail and rises, yawning and stretching out his enormous body. I lift my face and catch his dark eyes watching me as he runs a casual hand through his mop of hair. My gaze flickers down to his blood-smeared erection.
He turns on the TV and clicks through the channels without looking at me. “All you, little one. We’ll go take a bath while we wait for the domperidone to kick in.” Paw Patrol flickers on the screen and he smiles at it. “If I had a nickel for every kid I see under ten with Paw Patrol shit, I could retire tomorrow.”
My heart pounds. I swallow down vomit. Now’s my chance to change how I look in his head.
“What do you do?” I croak.
Ben sets down the remote, ambling over to my dresser. He’s not at all ashamed of his nudity and I can understand why. He’s tall and built like a fucking mountain: not with fine sculpted details like a model on Men’s Health, but just big. His thick arms run through with tendon and muscle, broad shoulders shifting as he sifts through my clothes. He’s strong.
“Obstetrics and gynecology,” he replies. He selects a pink nightgown and white panties. Innocence, I guess. “Most of my residency was in pediatrics.” He shuts the drawer and opens another.
“…Oh.” I swallow again. “What medication did you give me?”
He claims he’s not a pedophile, but there’s something really wrong in that head of his. I don’t know if I want to find out, especially with the advent of ‘mommy’ stuff.
Ben throws the clothes over his shoulder, things for me and him. “It will make you lactate.”
Oh god. My lower lip trembles at his approach and he gets the patronizing smile on his face again. I smile back as best as I can.
“I’m thirsty,” I rasp, trying to change the subject.
“Mhm. We’ll have a drink while I wash you.” He stands beside the bed, our clothes over his bare shoulder, and opens his arms to me. “Come.”
Trembling, I push myself up on my aching arms and manage to turn towards Ben. He scoops me up and I wrap my legs around his waist, holding on tight for the short walk across my room. I can’t ask about that yet. Baby steps.
I’m set on my feet in the bathroom. Ben starts the bath and lays our clothes out on the sink, where I catch my reflection in the mirror. I stare at the diaper and my bruise-stricken neck. I’m getting thinner already. Has it really only been a few days?
He saunters over to help me out of the diaper. His gaze catches mine in the mirror and he smiles smugly at the sight of blood on my inner thigh. It makes sense, considering the size of his dick and me being a virgin.
Ben whispers in my ear. “Daddy has a nice, big cock—doesn’t he?”
I nod, peering down at his flagging erection with terror. Instead of trying to pretend I’m not intimidated by it, or afraid of the pain, I decide to give him the humiliating truth he wants.
“I’m scared of it,” I mumble, leaning closer to him. Touching his skin makes me nauseous.
It makes his cock engorge. Ben deliberately presses his warm, pulsing erection to my stomach and plants soft kisses on my shoulder.
“Are you?” he murmurs. He settles his hands on my hips, guiding me toward the tub. “I split you open, didn’t I?”
“…Yes.” Tears gather in my eyes. “It hurt.”
My cunt throbs in agreement. Ben coos in my ear as he turns off the water and helps me into the warm bath with him. I shiver, settling between his thighs like the last time. My skin is alight with little agonies from his touch—in all the places where he’s too forceful and too violent. I hate touching him, but I’m still comforted having his broad chest behind my back.
Inside, I hurt in more ways than one.
My captor sets to work cleaning my body with the loofa. He doesn’t linger much, choosing to spend more time lavishing my breasts with attention instead of my pussy. I try to breathe. I try to keep calm. This is a good thing. This is a bath.
Ben helps me wash my hair and does the same with his behind me while I lean forward. My shoulders stick out of the water, hunched together, and I shudder miserably. I’m never going to college. I’ll never see my friends again. Should I just go out with a bang and deprive him of more sadistic pleasure? Or do I keep fighting?
My thoughts ripple off in a thousand different directions and I can’t get a grip on any of them. I close my eyes as Ben kisses between my shoulder blades so softly that I almost miss it.
“I’m going to rape you again,” he whispers against my skin.
My heart skips a beat. I fight the urge to run like fucking hell. I’m going to rape you again. He is a fucking sadist. Fucking psychopath.
I don’t reply. I don’t think I’m supposed to. Ben trails his fingertips along the sides of my body under the water and tickles my nape with kisses and subtle little licks. He dips a hand between my thighs, thumbing my clit, and I huff in surprise. His other hand travels up to play with my breast.
He works my nipple, twisting a bit, and I feel a strange tingle. “Ah—there it is. You’re letting down.”
Ben turns me in the water and reclines back, perching me over his hips. His cock strokes my clit under the water and he gazes at my breasts. I stare as white fluids beads at the tips of my nipples and a strange heaviness settles in my chest; tight and needy. My spine prickles.
He smiles and dips his lips to my left tit, latching on like earlier, and sucks. Pleasure flits in the back of my head and jolts down to where his cock strokes me, and I can’t hold back a gasp. It’s warm, fuzzy pleasure, like getting a tight hug.
Ben suckles in a steady, relaxed manner with his eyes closed. He lazily works my hips but after a few minutes I’m rubbing against him on my own, panting from the delicious feeling his lips make. He swallows back everything that flows out of my breast until nothing more comes out. My right tit still feels heavy and sore.
He reclines again, licking his lips, smiling like he’s drunk. “You don’t seem scared of my cock now. You seem like a hungry little whore.” Ben reaches under the water and angles the head of his cock down so it prods my entrance.
The water doesn’t lubricate. I cry out with genuine distress as he penetrates me as slowly as he probably can. He holds my hips to keep me from squirming away and water laps over the edge of the tub. Ben’s hazy dark eyes lock on my face, drinking in my contorted expressions.
“Such a tight little pussy,” he coos. “Does this hurt, sweetheart? Is it too much for you?” I nod, choking on a sob as he sinks deeper. “I know it is, but you’re still going to do it.” He sits up suddenly and sloshes more water over the edge of the tub. “Daddy loves fucking you.”
It hurts more than the first time. I grit my teeth as Ben stretches me open with shallow thrusts until he settles fully inside me, groaning gutturally. He forces me to bob in his lap and mouths at my other tit after setting a rhythm. I feel him stroking up and down and hitting all the raw spots from last night, and I’m about to cry when he lathes in to my right nipple.
It takes two suckles for my body to relax like it’s been cut off marionette strings. Warmth coils in my belly and loosens up the muscles in my cunt, and all of a sudden, sex feels good.
I cling to Ben’s head, panting while he thrusts and sucks milk from my breast. It feels good—really good. He laps his tongue along my nipple and I come undone without any warning. Gasping, I bury my face in the top of his head and moan as the pleasurable contractions set in. They’re long and slow and strong. Even Ben huffs and slaps my ass under the water. Holy fuck.
It’s amazing, even if it shouldn’t be. Ben pops off my nipple with a wet smack and kisses me hard, dribbling my own milk in my mouth. It’s thin and watery with no real taste. I gag as I swallow.
He breaks away, licking his lips. “You said you were thirsty, little one. Daddy’s here to take care of you.”
I’m slack from my weird orgasm when Ben abruptly leaves the tub. He carries me out the the bedroom sopping wet and drops me on my bed. I whine when he enters me from behind. It’s deep. I squirm away, trying to escape.
Ben yanks my hair. “Where do you think you’re going? I’m not done fucking you.” He leans across my back, thrusting hard and fast, and shoves the discarded binky in my mouth. “I felt you come all over my cock. You like being raped?”
I shake my head spastically. Ben reaches a big hand underneath us to play with my clit, and I tighten in response. My nook bobs with frantic fear as he teases me and grunts into my hair. Our wet skin slaps together.
“Good girls don’t come when they’re raped,” Ben whispers in my ear. He wrestles down my defiant struggling. “But you did—all over daddy’s cock. If you make a sound when you do again, you’re getting a spanking.”
My teeth lock down on the plastic binky. Does that mean I like it? Does that make me a bad person?
When I climax again, I hold my breath to keep from moaning. Ben laughs and rocks my hips to ride it out himself, lilting into deep groans. I can feel my muscles flutter and squeeze around him, trying to encourage an orgasm from him, too. Two bodies built for one purpose. Machines.
Ben leans across my back. “Very good.” He cups one of my breasts and I whimper. “Getting heavy again, aren’t they? Don’t worry, daddy’s going to help soon—” His breath hitches. “Fuck, I’m about to come. You’re so fucking tight—beg me to stop. Beg me to stop.”
I spit out the nook and gladly oblige. “Please don’t come in me! I don’t want to get pregnant!”
“I want you pregnant.” Ben grunts in my ear and I feel him twitch inside me. “Nice and round with my baby. My Rey.” He wraps a hand around my throat, clenching. “Keep begging, bitch.”
So I do. I let out all of the things I really feel and scream at him to stop and beg him not to finish inside me. He whispers in my ear when he finally does and warm, sticky ropes of cum spurt inside me. I sob into the pillow with each lazy thrust.
“That’s my good girl,” he coos. “Take it… take it…”
Ben keeps moving his hips long after he’s done coming. He murmurs in my ear, combing his long fingers through my hair while I cry quietly. I can’t do this. I can’t tolerate it any more.
“I know, honey. I know.” He shifts his hips and rolls over to lie beside me. His dark eyes are soft and sleepy, sated from his orgasm. “You’re so beautiful.”
I stare at him, tracing the long slant of his jaw with my eyes. He’s not ugly, and he doesn’t look like a monster. He looks like a normal guy. I stare at him, then touch his cheek with a trembling hand. He nuzzles into my palm and smiles.
“So are you,” I croak. “That’s why I don’t understand.”
Ben kisses the heel of my palm. “You will.”
Then he draws me closer and cranes his neck to my chest. His lips latch to my nipple and I whimper, relieved to feel the pressure dissipate. It feels nice. It’s so relaxing.
He draws my hand to the column of his throat. His Adam’s apple bobs under my fingertips with each suckle from my drug-induced lactation and it’s oddly mesmerizing. I cup the back of his head with my other hand and close my eyes. The rhythmic motions slowly put my to sleep and I find my fingers combing through Ben’s thick hair, stroking from root to tip.
“I love you so much,” he sighs. He kisses a lazy line to my other nipple. “I love you so much, mommy.”
I’m too exhausted to panic. I drift off to sleep as Ben latches on my other nipple, humming to himself and gently massaging my breast. This feels nice.
Chapter 9: Sleeping Beauty
i'm extra angsty today so here ya go
I’m already awake, but I wish I were dead. I shudder at the sound of his voice and pretend to be drowsy as I open my eyes with a small smile.
Ben’s standing over me with his hands in his pockets. He’s wearing black slacks and a charcoal shirt with a tie, dressed up for his first day back to work. His black hair is parted to the side and neat like when we first met. He smiles back at me and fiddles briefly with his watch. I see a silver band on his left ring finger.
“I got you a present,” he murmurs. He cups my cheek with a big hand and strokes under my eye. “You’ll be so lonely when I’m at work… So I figured you could use a friend to keep you company.”
I frown. “Like a cat?”
His smile tips me off.
Ben leans over for a moment, then straightens with a plastic terrarium in his hands—and an enormous black tarantula crouching in the center.
I almost scream. I’m deathly afraid of spiders and this one is bigger than my hand. It shifts slightly as Ben sets the terrarium down on the nightstand, sloshing some water in the stone dish. The thing taps its front legs and begins to wander. Oh my god. Oh my fucking god.
“Do you like him?” Ben asks innocently. He taps the side of the cage and I flinch when the tarantula rears up, displaying its huge fangs. “Ooo; what a feisty little thing.”
My stomach turns at the sight of it. I hate him. I hate him.
I crack a pained smile. “It’s—it’s great. I’ll call him Peter.” I manage to laugh. “Like Spider-Man.”
Ben keeps on smiling back at me. He gestures for me to sit up and I do, still wearing the gown from last night. I hang my legs over the side of the bed and try not to let my fear of the tarantula show. My ankles hook together when Ben combs his long fingers through my hair.
“Do you really like him, Rey?” He idly reaches over toward the terrarium and pops the lid open.
I can’t help but look. Ben gently guides my gaze back with his fingers on my jaw and promptly works through his belt. My heart pounds.
“Y—Yes,” I stammer. “Yes, Daddy.”
“My good girl, showing initiative.” He reaches in his pants and slips his cock free, already half hard. “Are you hungry?”
I catch the spider shying away from Ben’s hand. It hesitates, then taps his fingertips with its front legs. Precum beads at the tip of his cock and I’m not sure which issue is more pressing.
My ears ring, but I nod. “Yes… Yes.”
“Open your mouth.”
My trembling lips part and Ben guides his head just inside the warmth of my mouth. He groans, cupping the back of my head while I obediently lap at the underside of his shaft, still struggling to watch the spider. Keep it away, keep it away…
“That’s right,” he whispers, “enjoy it.” He sweeps his hand to my throat and squeezes. “You’ll have to feed your new pet, too. He likes newborn mice—still pink, with their eyes closed. Can you feed him like a big girl?”
I close my eyes and nod. I’m going to vomit after he’s done with me.
Ben’s other hand slips under my shirt to play with my breast and a bit of milk squirts out. I sneak a glance at the terrarium and find it empty, which means the fucking tarantula is crawling around somewhere. I wrench my eyes shut and suck his cock in my mouth to make him cum faster.
He tightens his grip on my throat. “You seem nervous, little one. Worried about your pet?” Ben pushes deeper, gagging me, then abruptly pulls out. He seizes my jaw and I cough as I grimace at him. “The key is to keep very, very still.”
My eyes widen as I catch sight of the tarantula idly patting my thigh with a long leg. Shaking, I hook my fingers on Ben’s belt and hold back sobs.
He traces the tip of his cock along my lips. “Shh… go nice and slow… don’t try to rush.”
“Please,” I beg, tears prickling in my eyes, “please stop.”
The tarantula creeps along, testing my skin before each step. It almost slips into the cleft between my thighs and I startle. The thing rears back and I have to bite my lip until I bleed to keep from screaming.
Ben keeps his dark eyes on my face as I finally break into quiet sobs. He strokes his cock offhandedly, watching me slipping into a full panic, then tangles his fingers in my hair at my nape.
“I’ll put your pet away,” he acquiesces, “but you’ll have to be punished for lying about liking him. Does that sound fair?”
I nod fast. He raises his eyebrows and shrugs, like I made the wrong choice. Anything is better than having a fucking tarantula crawling all over me. Anything. I’ll wear a thousand diapers and let Ben fuck me in them without making a peep if he gets Peter off me.
Ben buttons his pants and I watch as he calmly sweeps the spider off my thigh without hesitation. It doesn’t resist much, climbing on his broad palm, and Ben keeps his hand still as he lowers it back into the terrarium. The tarantula crawls off and sits very still in the center of the cage.
I stare at it. “That’s… that’s it?”
Ben leans over beside the bed and takes out a bag of newborn mice. They’re all pink and squirming, lumped together in the bag—food for the awful thing crouching a few feet away. I cover my mouth in horror as Ben reaches in for one of them.
“Everything has to eat, Rey,” he chides. “Nature is ugly and cruel.”
He drops the poor thing in the cage. The tarantula seems to sense it, then dashes over to the mouse and snatches it up. I turn away and gag.
“Can’t you at least knock them out first?” I ask weakly. “So they don’t suffer?”
“Yes—but our friend Peter is a predator that’s evolved a certain hunting method.” Ben rustles a bag and the cage snaps shut. “Who am I to deprive him of that for my human sentimentality?”
Ugh. I shudder at the thought of being consumed by an enormous tarantula. I wish someone would knock me out before that happened.
Ben turns on the television and settles on Digimon for some reason. He steps out of his shoes, eyes trained on the screen, and crawls into bed with me. I shift to let him lie back in the pillows and he puts an arm behind his head while I obediently unbuckle his belt again.
He squints at the TV. “I spent two hours convincing a woman to vaccinate her child instead of bringing him to a ‘pox party.’”
I hesitate. He’s… talking to me? What’s his problem today? He’s all over the place.
Nervous, I fumble over his pants. “Oh. Like chicken pox?”
“Mhm.” Ben groans when I lick along the underside of his cock. “Fucking new age shit is just reverting back to the old shit that doesn’t work.”
He runs his long fingers through my hair and guides me deeper. I’m too full of him to keep talking and focus on what I need to do to get him to come quickly. He rolls his hips to meet the sucking from my mouth and drool runs along the corner of my lips. My eyes water.
The salty taste of precum slicks on my tongue. I try to lie flat and let Ben fuck my mouth like I know he wants to. Sometimes he pushes back too far and I cough, but I don’t complain and I don’t pull away. His deep voice echoes around the quiet room, gruff with pleasure and somehow doing things to me. I shift my hips.
Ben doesn’t pick up on it immediately. He closes his eyes and arches back a bit, twitching in my mouth, but doesn’t come. A foreign tingle of excitement zips straight down my spine and between my legs. I swallow hard, squirming again to avoid the awful realization that I’m getting turned on.
He huffs, groaning. “I’ve been thinking about this all day. You give such good head.” Ben cups my cheek and presses his thumb to the sallow part to feel his cock move on my mouth. He smiles. “Are you hungry?”
My stomach twists. I haven’t eaten since breakfast, but I know he’ll come back later with dinner. I nod and move faster.
Ben nods, dark eyes hooded. “I can tell. Hungry for daddy’s cock.” He brushes my hair back from my face. “But if you want to come, you have to climb in my lap and ride me. Which one do you want more, hm? A full belly or coming?”
I hesitate. He raises his eyebrows and laughs at my dilemma like he finds it mildly amusing. The tingle of arousal between my thighs could just get worse and worse, and I’m sure he’ll make sure I can’t masturbate on my own.
I’m not crazy about him cumming in my mouth, anyway. I lean away from Ben’s cock and wipe my lips, now tacky with spit and precum, and awkwardly crawl over his lap. He hums like I made the right choice and pushes down his pants past his thighs. I feel like a moron.
“That’s my good girl.” Ben holds my hips while I try to lower onto his cock. “Nice and slow on daddy’s cock—nice and slow for you.”
I clench the front of his dress shirt as I do what he says and gently meet the warmth of his cock. He helps hold it at the right angle and we both watch the inches disappear inside my body. I’m not being pinned down. I’m doing this entirely on my own volition and it feels kind of good.
“Is this my punishment?” I mumble, emboldened by Ben talking to me twice.
He laughs, breathless. “No, sweetheart. Not yet.” His cock strokes through me, no longer meeting resistance, and I whimper. “This is so I don’t fucking strangle pox party cunts like Rita Jenkins.”
I adjust in his lap and he takes control, pushing me back and forth and up and down. It’s a lot. I bunch his shirt in my hands and wince as Ben bounces me in his lap. He holds my hips still at one point and fucks into me with wet slaps, not stopping when I cry out in pain.
Ben seizes my jaw, clenching his, forcing me to look at him. “I saw you squirming while you were sucking my cock, Rey. Did you like it?”
My muscles tense at the thought of admitting that. I shake my head almost imperceptibly and he growls, cupping a hand under my breast. He squeezes until milk oozes out and I jerk back at the sensation. I can’t admit it; I can’t admit it—
My refusal to admit it really pisses Ben off. He shoves me off his lap and I curl up in a ball on the mussed sheets as he gets out of bed. He yanks up the bedrail and opens the nightstand, rummaging around for something particularly awful. Peter skitters to his half log with his dinner.
I sit up, crying. “I’m sorry—I’m sorry—”
“You’re making this fucking impossible!” Ben snaps, slamming the drawer shut. He slaps a manacle around one of my wrists and restrains me to the bedrail. “I know you fucking like it—stop fighting back!”
He leans over me and I cower, afraid he’ll hit me for once, but he yanks up another bedrail. He attaches my other wrist to it and drops the box of suppositories between my thighs. A blue nook comes next, roughly pushed through my lips.
I shake my head as Ben gets back in the bed with a livid expression on his pale face. He draws his hair back in a half-ponytail and shakes out two of the suppositories in his palm. My body screams at me to panic, but I don’t want to piss him off even more. I shudder miserably.
He grasps my thigh and pushes up to raise my ass a couple inches. “You don’t seem to be grasping the concept here, Rey.” My toes curl as he introduces the first suppository. “You need me.”
The other one comes and he releases. I squirm uncomfortably and Ben grasps my knee to part my thighs. He pushes inside me again, groaning, and I arch and grunt at the tight fit.
It’s an awful experience. He’s already angry from work and fucks me until tears run down my cheeks, snapping insults about what a whore I am. My body responds to his thumb circling my clit and I climax with terrified puffs around the nook. Ben breaks into another smile when I do, watching the humiliation contort my face.
He fucks me for all of five minutes after that. My legs quiver around his hips during the ordeal, Ben grunting in my hair, and I watch TV over his shoulder. I feel him throb inside me and he gasps and erratically thrusts through his orgasm. He’s big enough that I can feel each twitch of his cock.
Ben sags when he’s done, sighing. “You’ll break.” His sleepy gaze flickers to mine. “Sooner or later, you’ll break.”
I stare as he leans up and steps out of bed. He fixes his clothes, making no move to free me, and leaves without saying anything else.
Chapter 10: Compliance
this is so poorly written lmao
The medication goes to work about fifteen minutes after Ben leaves me alone in the room. At first it’s an ache in my breasts, but it quickly progresses to painful pulsing fullness. I sob helplessly, restrained and unable to move.
It’s awful. It feels like I need someone to squeeze them, but Ben is nowhere to be seen. The chains jangle as I wail and kick my feet, desperate for help. I know he has a baby monitor to keep an eye on me, so I hope he’ll come help if I keep kicking up a fuss and screaming.
The TV changes to Paw Patrol and I cry into the binky. I don’t spit it out, because sucking on it helps me relax. I close my eyes. I’m so hungry.
Time drags on. The door opens and I glance up to see Ben slip inside with a smile on his lips. He coos when I whimper and strain against my restraints. I’m so hungry and my boobs ache. He’s dressed in sweatpants and a maroon Harvard t-shirt.
“Hello, honey.” Ben leans over the bed, smiling. “Did you need me for something?”
My lower lip trembles. “My… my…” I nudge my chest with my bicep. “It hurts.”
“Ah. I see. I can help you.”
He unlocks my wrists and lowers the rail to help me out of bed. I reach up for my breasts but Ben swats my hands down and leads me to the bathroom. He helps me into the shower and washes me while I shudder and sob. It hurts so much and I’m so hungry.
We walk back to the bedroom, me naked, and Ben curls a strand of hair behind my ear. He sits me on the edge of my bed and kneels before me to seal his lips over my right nipple. I gasp, clutching his head to bring him closer. Milk flows with each suckle and relieves the ache.
I bury my face in his hair and moan. Ben hums and cups my breast while he nurses, squeezing more milk and edging between my knees. I wrap my legs around his back and struggle to get closer. It feels so nice. It’s better than a back scratch.
Ben rises after a bit and cups my jaw. “If you’re hungry, you’ll have to suck my cock for your dinner.” He smiles, licking his lips. “Can you do that?”
I claw at his belt to free his cock and eagerly suck the salty, hot hardness in my mouth. I’m desperate for another grilled cheese and soup. Ben groans and massages my other breast, spilling milk in his palm and making me whimper. But the pain ebbs away and warm relief sets in.
He keeps thrusting in my mouth until he cums, filling my cheeks. I swallow as fast as I can and huff when Ben tugs me away from his cock. He cups my face and whispers about how beautiful I am, then kneels again to suck on my nipples.
After he’s expressed all the milk he can, we lie in my bed together and watch TV. He’s dressed again and I’m in my pink onesie, hair drawn back at my nape with a nook in my mouth. I lie quietly at his side amongst the pillows and stuffed animals with his long arm around me. He idly combs his fingers along the top of my scalp, toying with my hair.
My stomach grumbles loudly, demanding attention, and I peer up at Ben. His dark eyes roam elsewhere, disinterested in me. I’m not supposed to speak—so I don’t. Is this the punishment?
Ben stays focused on the television. “Hungry?”
I nod once. He shifts a bit to push down his sweatpants so his half-hard cock pops out, and he gestures vaguely to it. Ice prickles down my spine. This is what I’m supposed to ‘eat.’
The realization just about kills my appetite, but I still squirm down to Ben’s hips to suck him off again. I’m so hungry that I’m willing to do it. Refusing after making a ‘request’ will just get me in even more trouble.
He changes the television to a nature documentary as I lick along his length to bring him back to full hardness. Nothing I’m doing seems to interest him much. He cups a hand on the back of my head and twirls my hair around his fingertip, more concerned with watching TV.
But he still groans as I take him in my mouth and I glean a gross sense of satisfaction from it. He rests his head back and closes his eyes, petting me like a cat while I suck him from root to tip. My gag reflex kicks in and I cough and drool all over him, eyes tearing up as he touches the back of my throat.
Ben laughs softly and brushes my hair back from my face. He smiles at me, eyes lidded, and wipes saliva from the corner of my mouth with his thumb. It’s strange and tender.
“Hungry girl,” he coos.
I keep going until he comes down my throat. Ben bucks his hips into my mouth, grunting while he finishes, fingers tangled in my hair. He lets me go a moment later, broad chest heaving as he draws me up to him to kiss my lips. His tongue dips in my mouth and he cups my face, leaning forward as I crawl into his lap.
“All full, Rey?” Ben whispers, searching my eyes.
My stomach twists like it’s searching for food. I’m afraid to deny him what he wants, especially if this is the punishment, so I nod and smile faintly. He turns me in his lap so I’m lying between his legs, back to his chest. I swallow hard.
We sit there again in silence. Ben rubs my stomach with one big hand, but doesn’t make a move any lower. He kisses my head lackadaisically and my skin tingles wherever his lips touch. His heart beats slow and steady while mine patters away. It would be relaxing if he wasn’t such a beast.
Ben sighs. “Much better, little one. Much better.” He reaches behind himself for something and hands me a brown teddy bear. His lips brush my ear. “Now daddy wants to watch you play.”
I give an involuntary shudder, but do what he wants. He drapes his hands on my thighs to keep them spread and breathes on my temple as I position the stuffed animal. Ben cups a hand over both of mine as I roll my hips, rubbing the thing on my clit. The TV carries on in front of us.
I’m not really trying to come and I can always fake it, but I’m paranoid that he can tell I’m faking it. So I close my eyes and buck my hips against the teddy bear until I find the right spot that tingles pleasurably down my thighs. He’ll know if I’m faking, like he knows everything else. It’s easier to actually make myself come than risk him noticing it’s all an act.
Ben helps me move the stuffed animal and listens to the little moans that slip through my lips. He absentmindedly rubs his thumb along my thigh in the meantime and kisses my temple.
“I want you to do this when I leave,” he whispers. “Crawl under your sheets and hump one of your pillows so I can watch on the camera—and say my name while you do it.”
“Okay,” I mumble. My breath hitches and I rub the teddy bear harder. “I’m—I’m going to come right now, daddy.”
It slips out without any prompting. Ben pushes down on the stuffed animal and groans while he watches me come undone with melodramatic wails. It feels good, but not that good.
He pets me after and slides a hand in the onesie to check how wet I am. His long fingers smear my essence through my folds and it arouses me again. I grab his wrist, delirious with want, and he silently lets me fuck myself on his fingers.
Ben leaves after I have another toe-curling climax. He helps me under my sheets and kisses my forehead, licking my juices from his fingers as he leaves me alone in the mockery of my bedroom.
When I wake a few hours later, I groggily drag a pillow under my comforter and push it under my hips. The television is off and I’m alone in the darkness as I do exactly what Ben said and rub off on the pillow. It’s bizarre. I don’t know what he gets out of it. But I bury my face in my pillows and moan while I do it until I climax, huffing and frantically thrusting.
Then I go back to sleep, stomach twisting with hunger—and I wake in the same state.
Time drags on. I’m alone in my room for a long while, hungry and tired, and so bored that I chat with Peter the tarantula. My breasts ache a bit but I know better than to touch them. I lie in bed and rub my stomach, wincing when it growls.
The door opens and Ben comes in with a bottle of water. He’s dressed up, maybe just home from work, and smiles when I scramble upright in bed. I don’t shy away from him like I usually do. My gut writhes at the promise of food.
“I liked watching you the other night,” he says as he sits on the edge of my bed. He offers me the water and I guzzle it down. “You’re doing so well, kitten. Would you like a bath?”
I nod, spilling water down my chin. Ben smiles wryly and wipes it up with a broad stroke of his thumb. He doesn’t have any food with him. The realization makes my heart sink, and I obediently climb over his lap to unbuckle his belt.
He doesn’t say a word. He combs his thick fingers through my hair as I work open his khakis and immediately take his cock in my mouth. A pleased groan rumbles through his chest and he rubs my back while I bob up and down, struggling to make him come as fast as possible. Drool leaks from the corners of my mouth.
“That’s my good girl,” Ben whispers. He listens to me slurp for a bit and groans again. “Daddy’s hungry little girl is so messy.”
Maybe he’s pent-up, but it only takes a few minutes before I get what I’m after. My mouth fills with salty, warm cum and my ears fill with Ben’s satisfied grunts as he pins my mouth to his cock.
I’m rewarded with a bath. Ben cleans the sweat and grime from my skin and watches me masturbate with the loofa. He kisses my temple and mumbles about how much he loves me. I almost believe him—I want to believe him.
We cuddle in bed afterwards. I learn that my punishment is to only ‘eat’ cum. I’m not sure how long it will last or what Ben wants, but I obey. It’s easier to obey.
…And time flows on, and I claw for Ben’s pants whenever he visits. He fucks my mouth and comes down my throat and I grow disoriented from hunger. I have plenty of water and company in the form of my spider, Peter. I’m starving. I’m so hungry, and he’s the only source of sustenance.
One day, when I kneel before him, Ben offers me a cereal bar. I stare at it and drool.
“It’s okay,” he whispers. “Eat it, sweetheart. It’s for you—for being so good.”
I rip the wrapper to shreds and wolf the thing down, crouching to eat the crumbs off the floor. Ben steps behind me and I hardly respond to him penetrating me. He fucks me hard and laughs.
“That’s my good kitten. My good girl.” Ben nuzzles the back of my head. “Let’s move you upstairs.”
Chapter 11: Incubus
It’s a little melodramatic, but I cry when I see the sun.
My heart skips a beat at the sight of golden rays filtering through the blinds, spilling across dark hardwood floors. We’re in a beautiful kitchen with stainless steel appliances and granite counters, but I shuffle towards the sun, drawn to it. I can escape. I can just… jump through the window…
Fingertips brush under my shirt, tickling my spine. Ben kisses the top of my head and I shudder.
He hums. “You’re trembling.”
“I’m… I’m…” I shudder again. “I don’t know.”
Ben picks me up in the next moment, supporting me with an arm around my back and one under my bottom. He kisses my temple and pats my shoulder blades, swaying slightly.
“Let me show you around,” he suggests. “You’ll be living up here from now on, little one.”
I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my face under his jaw. My thighs tighten around his hips as we walk from room to room, admiring the modern decorations and fancy furniture. He’s a doctor, after all. The house has six bedrooms and four bathrooms, all decked out and clean, and we walk to the end of the second floor hallway.
Ben takes out a key from his pocket. “This will be your room during the day—we’ll sleep together at night, of course.” The key crunches. “Here I can watch you, and you can play.”
I’m too hungry and sleepy to ask what he means. I blink groggily on his shoulder and sigh as the door swings open. I don’t care anymore. I don’t know why he recreated my apartment, I don’t know why he chose me in the first place, and I don’t care.
It’s a pretty room. The carpet is beige, the curtains pink, and a twin bed with pink sheets is wedged in the corner. He has a white dresser and nightstand for me, and a small television. It’s bigger than my bedroom before. There’s a chest with stuffed animals sticking out of it and a couple on the bed, along with a bookshelf filled with all kinds of stuff. Flowery wallpaper.
I tremble on my feet when Ben sets me down. My toes curl on the carpet, relishing the texture, and I sit obediently on the edge of the bed. He smiles and turns on the TV.
“Daddy has to work,” he says, “so you can read books, watch TV… do whatever you’d like while I’m gone. I’ll get Peter from the basement.”
The mattress is nice and plushy. I bounce on it, feeling out the springs, and redden when Ben kisses my forehead. He hands me the remote and leaves the room without another word. The door shuts and the lock clicks.
I’m not stupid—I know it locks from the outside. I rise from the bed and walk to the window, basking in the morning glow. We’re in the woods. I see trees and not much else, but it’s better than nothing. I can see the sun. I’m half-surprised it exists at all.
Ben returns with Peter. He sets him on top of my dresser and taps the roof of the cage, smiling. He’s wearing sweatpants and a Nirvana T-shirt, black hair bedraggled, maybe still sleepy. I haven’t sucked his cock yet so I’m not sure why. The cereal bar gives me a bit of energy—a sliver of lucidity.
Ben slips his hands in his pockets. “Take good care of him. I’ll be home around five.”
“Okay,” I mumble, gazing outside. There’s no clock, anyway.
He coils his arms around my waist and kisses my temple. He’s warm. He smells like home.
“Are you still hungry?” Ben murmurs.
I let him push me down to my knees. The sunlight warms my back as I tug down his sweatpants and take his cock in my mouth. I suck with my eyes closed as Ben gently guides me by the back of my head, whispering about how good I am. I don’t give a shit about that. At least… I don’t think I do.
He cups my jaw when he comes, filling my mouth with the familiar salty taste of cum. I’m so accustomed to it that I hardly flinch as it spills down my throat, thick and warm. His hooded dark eyes search my face.
“My hungry girl,” he whispers. “So messy.”
Cum leaks from the corner of my mouth. I cough as Ben wipes it up with his thumb and offers to back. I don’t want to lick it, but I’m hungry and I hope he’ll be nicer if I do what he wants. I lap it up, shivering and swallowing back the remnants of his orgasm.
Ben smiles. “Are you ready to nap now?” He helps me to my feet, then presses a broad palm to my stomach. “Nice full belly?”
I nod, accustomed to lying. I’m so hungry that I can’t fucking think about anything else, even the nausea his creepy words inspire.
He hugs me tight and kisses me all over my head before leaving the room. My throat burns and I taste salt.
But I’m left privacy, so I shower and change into a fresh white nightgown in the meantime. I wash my mouth with mouthwash until I almost puke it up in the sink, then do it all over again. I’d like to vomit up his cum, but I need protein.
Ben’s sitting on my bed when I emerge. He’s dressed in black slacks and a gray dress shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He smiles as he binds his hair in a ponytail and beckons me closer. My stomach turns.
I approach, hesitant. He pulls me between his knees and settles his huge hands on my hips. His dark eyes regard mine.
“Take a nap—” Ben brushes my hair from my face, frowning. “And let your tummy settle. I left you some coloring books, too.” He frets over my damp hair some more. “Don’t do anything silly, kitten. Okay?”
He smiles and cups my head, palms over my ears, drawing my forehead to his lips for a kiss. Ben leaves without much fanfare. He locks the bedroom door behind him.
It’s a weird sense of freedom. I wander the room for a while, picking at the walls for cameras, then stare out the window for a long time. The dark evergreens stretch as far as I can see, and I can’t get the window open. I stare beyond them to the horizon, low purple mountains and mist. Freedom.
Rose and Paige probably known I’m missing. Probably.
I find a coloring book with Paw Patrol characters and sit on the floor to shade them in. I’m so delirious from hunger that I don’t know what else to do. Sesame Street plays in the background while I scribble colors in on the police dog. It’s… relaxing. I don’t have any worries. This is easy living.
More books wait on the bookshelf: The Hungry Hungry Caterpillar, Where The Wild Things Are, Stella Luna… It’s a lot, and way below my reading level. I trace a finger on the spines and my chest tightens, but no tears come. What is he doing to me?
I’m just finishing up the police dog picture when I hear the key in the lock. Ben peers inside my bedroom and beams when he catches me on the floor. He looks tired and has a white lab coat draped over his arm. It strikes me—he’s a doctor. A real doctor.
He joins me on the floor with my coloring book, sitting behind me with his long legs stretched past mine. I huff as he kisses my cheek and nibbles down my jaw to my collarbone.
“How was your day?” Ben coos in my ear.
“Good. I colored… looked at the trees.” It feels like I’m an alien to the world outside. I guess I am by now.
Ben keeps kissing my neck while I color. He’s relaxed now—not worried and tense. I mechanically shade in the rest of the Paw Patrol police dog, shivering whenever he brushes my skin with his teeth. He shifts behind me and drapes his hard chest across my back. He smells like hospital.
We don’t say much. I color. We watch television until it changes to Seinfeld and Ben matters that it’s not appropriate. I’m content coloring in the firefighter dog on the next page. My hands tremble, vision swimming and shifting into shadow. Hm. I might faint.
He sighs. “Look at this—my sweet girl. You’re so well behaved today.” His fingers crawl across my protruding ribs to my stomach. “What do you want for dinner, kitten?”
Quivering, I drop my crayon and mechanically turn to face my captor. Ben laughs as I settle my hands on his belt and he grasps my wrists, guiding them up around his neck. I stare blankly and rest my knees over his hips. I don’t get it.
“Solid food,” he says. He raises his eyebrows. “Mac and cheese, maybe? I can add chicken or beef if you’d like.”
“Whatever you think is best,” I rely tonelessly.
That’s the right answer. Ben works open his pants in a hurry and lifts me in his lap. I have the pleasure of looking over his shoulder at the window as he pushes up my nightgown and tugs my panties out of the way. My knees bend to curl around his waist and I loll my head on his shoulder, eyes lidded. He impales me without taking his pants off and that’s going to stain.
Ben hugs me, burying his face in my neck. “Daddy knows what’s best, doesn’t he?”
I nod. The sun is setting. Winter?
His phone rings and he tosses it across the room. He leans back on one hand and sucks on my neck, one arm wrapped around my waist, working me up and down in his lap. I’m not ready for it, but I’m used to the pain. It’s a lot easier if I keep my mouth shut.
Ben thrusts up into me, clicking his teeth. “I’ve been thinking about you all day, little one. I missed you so much.” His hand glides down to squeeze my ass. “Did you miss me?”
“I dunno,” I mumble. I close my eyes and shudder.
He gives me a smack. I manage a small grunt of displeasure but I’m too exhausted and spent to tell him what he wants.
“Tell me you missed me,” he snaps.
My slow pulse throbs in my ears. I gaze out the window, moaning softly, and he yanks on my hair at my nape to force me to look at him. His dark eyes are hard and angry and he leans forward, using his other arm to make me keep moving on his cock.
Ben seizes my throat and squeezes. “Say it.” The muscles twitch in his cheek. “Tell me you need me.”
I scrabble at his wrist with both hands, quickly sinking into inconsolable sobs. It just makes him angrier and he keeps barking at me to say it until I wind up pinned on my back underneath him.
He isn’t fucking me anymore—now he’s just strangling me with one enormous hand, crouched over my hips. I cry and limply kick my feet and the darkness creeps in from the periphery. My ears ring. He keeps on demanding I say it until he’s practically shouting at me.
“Please,” I croak, “I can’t…” I shake my head slowly, hiccuping. “I can’t…”
Ben’s lower lip trembles and he abruptly lets off. He stares down at me while I take rattling breaths and cups my cheek—I think I hear him say my name.
My vision blurs, room swirling down on me in a huge black shadow. Now he does say my name and pats my cheek, trying to keep me awake, but all I can focus on is the empty pain in my stomach.
The ringing in my ears gets louder and louder and I slip into blissful unconsciousness. Not hungry, not tired—nothing at all.
Chapter 12: Lucid Dream
LMFAO WHOOPS DID THIS AND PETRICHOR?????
Unfortunately, death doesn’t come that easily.
I wake in Ben’s arms as he’s carrying me into a different room, but I’m barely lucid and I can’t make anything out. He says my name as he lays me down in a bed with the head elevated and cups my cheek with a big hand.
A strange sense of dread passes through me—and I think it’s an omen that I’m about to die.
Ben sits in a chair beside the bed and opens a drawer. Stuff rattles around; maybe something to torture me with before I fucking die. But he takes out other things that blur in my vision: a bottle of isopropyl alcohol, a butterfly needle, and gauze.
I swallow, rasping a laugh. “Some fucking doctor you are.”
“It’s only been two weeks,” he retorts. “You’ve eaten more than most people see in a month. Don’t move.”
He wipes my elbow and I watch him slip the needle under my skin. I don’t feel any pain. Blood blooms into the receptor and I have to turn my head away. Wooziness comes back; spinning my head and the room, and I take a couple gulping breaths before I pass out.
…Some time later, I wake up again—much to my chagrin. Sensation prickles to my fingertips and back up to my shoulder, and my eyes flutter open.
Ben’s sitting next to me in a green chair, dark eyes studying me with thinly veiled irritation. His arms are folded over his chest but he uncrosses them to grasp the armrests of his chair. The muscles twitch in his cheek as he chews it and glares at me.
My gaze travels down to my elbow. The needle is buried under my skin, attached to a tube running up to a clear IV bag. I swallow as I look around the small room, curious. White linoleum floor, some cabinets and drawers thrown open, stuff scattered all over. My bed has rails but it’s not like the one downstairs. It’s… a gurney?
I frown. “Am I in a hospital?”
“No.” Ben taps a finger on the armrest. “I assumed you’d try to commit suicide, so I set some equipment aside to keep you alive.”
“You assumed I’d try to kill myself, but took me anyway?”
“Yes.” He gestures around the room, smiling tightly. “You wouldn’t succeed—even though I’m not a good doctor.”
“You’re not. You almost killed me.”
Somehow, he looks even more pissed off. He takes a deep breath, still watching me, and raises his eyebrows. It gives me a sick sense of pleasure watching him get mad. He never loses his cool.
“I may have overplayed my hand,” he acquiesces. “I assumed you could survive longer without food. Semen does have quite a bit of protein, you know.” His smarmy smirk comes back. “You’re practically a connoisseur of it at this point.”
“Not anymore,” I hiss back. “I’d rather fucking die.” I clench my jaw and nod sharply. “I’m not doing that again. You can starve me to death.”
Ben rests his temple on his index finger, shifting his weight towards one side. He’s still wearing his dress shirt and slacks and I’m naked as usual. It’s weird talking to him like this. Usually he condescends until he scares the shit out of me and I have to give in and play along.
My pulse quickens. If I ruined the fantasy, is he done? Will he kill me? Maybe he has a few rooms covered with pictures of girls he stalks.
But he clicks his tongue and smiles.
“You won’t be getting away from me with a hunger strike,” he murmurs. “Either you can comply, or I can start feeding you medicine to ensure compliance.” He shrugs. “There’s always force-feeding, tube feeding, and of course—saline drips.”
“…You won’t just kill me?”
“Oh, no. You won’t get away from me, in life or in death.”
“But… why?” I ask, truly at a loss. “How did you even find me? Why did you start doing this in the first place?”
It doesn’t make any sense. There’s nothing special about me that should attract attention like this from a total lunatic.
Ben shrugs again. “Women don’t consent to these types of things and I was tired of paying prostitutes to scratch the surface. You’re a very pretty girl, Rey. I’ve always liked watching you, and before I knew it, I had amassed a generous collection of pictures. I figured I’d bring you into the fold—since no one will miss you.”
“I have friends!” I snap. “They’re probably worried sick!”
“Mm. Probably.” He smiles. “Probably.”
I’m trembling with rage, furious that this fucking freak kidnapped and tortured me because he thought I was pretty. Ben senses it. His smile takes on a sinister edge and he motions to a tray beside the bed with cereal and whole milk. It’s in a bowl printed with Disney princesses.
“You can choose to eat of your own volition,” he says, “or I can purée it and force it down your throat.” He holds up his hand that isn’t supporting his evil fucking head. “I’m a bit shaky, but I can fit you with a feeding tube if that’s more your speed.”
I grit my teeth. “Even when I do what you want, you still torment me.” Tears well up in my eyes and Ben pouts his lower lip. “I don’t understand what you want from me.”
“That’s a bit above your comprehension, kitten. For now, I want you to eat your Cheerios like a good girl and get some rest.”
He’s doing it again—talking down to me. I stare at him, struggling to figure out what’s going to get me back in his good graces.
Then I remember: I want you to be completely dependent on me.
“Can you help me?” I blurt.
“Me? Help a mature woman like you?”
I bite back a retort. Ben eyes me with boredom, like he’s expecting me to say the wrong thing and disinterested in punishing me. He’ll do it, though. I know how much he likes that part.
“Please.” It almost gets stuck in my throat— “…Daddy.”
He laughs and nudges the tray. It rattles.
“Don’t fuck with me, Rey. Eat your food.”
I don’t know if he wants me to keep begging or what the fuck he wants, because when I think I’ve figured it out, he just flips the script. I wring my hands and let the tears roll down my cheeks.
“Please,” I mumble. “My hands are shaky.”
Ben rolls his eyes, sighing, and leans forward to roughly grasp my wrists. He turns them, inspecting my quivering fingers, and releases.
He cracks the seal on the milk and pours it in the bowl. He’s trying to pretend I’m bothering him but I can see the same pleased curve to his mouth he always has when he does the weirdest shit to me: like the diapers and the binky.
I sit up in the blue sheets and watch Ben pick up the bowl. He lifts up a small scoop, dripping milk, and parts his lips like I need a demonstration of how to eat.
“Ah,” he says.
I’m beyond these little digs to my dignity. I open my mouth and let him gently feed me, scoop by scoop, milk dribbling down my chin and neck. That’s what he wants. Whether or not it will lead to worse things remains to be seen. I’m still trying to figure him out.
At the end Ben leans over me and licks the milk off my chin and neck.
“Good girl,” he whispers.
I cling to the front of his shirt, lying flat on my back. I just want to fucking scream.
Chapter 13: Arouse
the yuck continues
When I wake up again, I’m alone in the recovery room. No Ben, no IV—just me and the gurney with the drawers and cabinets closed. I feel a lot better, though. I guess that’s a good thing.
I blink hard before I slip out of bed to the cold floor. Stumbling, I investigate the drawers and cabinets until I figure out that they’re all locked. I huff and stagger my way to the door, annoyed there’s nothing for me to use as a weapon. The handle gives way and opens into a long hall.
The floor is dark wood. I peer out, gazing down the hall to my pink baby bedroom, and down the other way to a landing and sunlight. Obviously, I make my way towards the sunlight.
Classical music floats along from somewhere within the house. The closer I walk, the louder it gets. I stumble across the cool wood, fingers brushing beige walls, and rub my eyes. He’s letting me walk free? Is he losing his mind? I hope so. I hope he goes nuts and puts me out of my misery.
The landing looks out over a big window and a railing. I squint in the sunlight and turn a few times before proceeding down the stairs. They curve into a small foyer with a pretty welcome mat. I try the door, even though I know it won’t open.
“If only it were that easy, hm?”
Ben’s sitting in the kitchen at a gray granite island with a laptop in front of him. He types and peers at me over the rim of his glasses, then goes back to what he’s doing. He’s dressed—khakis and a blue dress shirt, sleeves rolled to the elbows.
The stainless steel refrigerator hums. I watch him uneasily, and only the clicking of his keyboard fills the room.
He picks up a recorder and presses a button on the side. “Eighteen-year-old female, normal vaginal delivery. Patient presents with postpartum depression, mastalgia—recommend psych consult.” Release, frown, click again. “Lactation consult as well.”
I blink. “…What are you doing?”
“Dictating.” Ben rubs a hand over his mouth and squints at the computer.
“Aren’t you a pediatrician?”
He shrugs. “Maybe.”
Silence ensues. I turn in a circle and wander around his kitchen, testing drawers to find a knife.
Ben grabs my arm and drags me to him and in his lap without a word. I squeak in surprise as he settles me on his thigh, absentmindedly kissing my temple. He goes right back to scrolling through some person’s medical chart.
I huff, shifting on his knee. “That’s a HIPAA violation.”
“You have no one to tell.” He wraps an arm around my back, caging me in so he can type. “This is how I can afford all those nice things for my little one—and why I like coming home and playing with you.”
Ugh. I shudder and look around the kitchen some more. It’s fancy. Looks like a doctor’s house; all stainless steel and spotless. No knives out.
Ben keeps typing up a report or something and checks on a few other patients. He doesn’t have a phone lying around. I consider hopping down and searching for one, but inciting his wrath again so soon after the last time seems like a bad idea.
Then he sighs and closes his MacBook. He kisses the top of my head and lifts me to my feet.
“Breakfast?” he asks.
I curl my toes on the cold floor. I’m naked and I feel very small when he stands up.
“Okay.” I fold my thighs, shivering. “Whatever is fine.”
Ben opens the fridge and takes out a couple things to make scrambled eggs. He turns on the stove and brushes past me to take down a skillet from a rack over the island. I shrink out of his way.
I’m afraid to ask— “Can I get dressed?”
He spins the skillet handle, turning back to the stove. “You know where your clothes are.”
“…Can you help me?”
For a minute, he’s quiet. He opens a cabinet and takes out a red mixing bowl and I stand and wait. He cracks two eggs in the bowl and I stand and wait. Come on—I know this is what you want.
Ben turns. He strides toward the stairs and I follow, skittering to keep up.
We walk down the hall to my bedroom, just as creepy as it was two days ago, and he opens my dresser drawer. Peter lifts his front legs, disturbed by the shaking. I hover back near the door and realize: it locks from the outside.
My pulse quickens. I can lock him in here. He can’t get out—right?
Ben rummages. “Lie on the bed.”
I hesitate. I need to plan. I need to think this through. He’s strong, so maybe he can bust the door down if I do manage to trap him inside. Then I’m really fucked. Lull him into a false sense of security and take some time to plan and learn the layout of the house. That’s sensible.
I shuffle to my pink bed and lie down on my back. He approaches with white panties and a onesie with unicorns printed all over it, but I’ll take that over a diaper any day. I swallow and press my feet together as he looms over me.
He smiles. “Foot, please.”
Ugh. I offer him one, and he cups my heel, then starts kissing my calf. My skin tingles as Ben slowly sinks to his knees at the edge of the bed and kisses a trail up my inner thigh. I shiver, closing my eyes. It could be worse. He could be shoving his cock down my throat.
His tongue traces along my skin, teasing close to my mound. “Daddy’s feeling a little hungry, too.” He slides his hands up my sides and fans his fingers around my ribs. I arch a bit. “Open up for me, princess.”
Trembling, I part my thighs around Ben’s head as he dips between them. He murmurs his approval and traces from entrance to clit with the tip of his nose and back down with the tip of his tongue. I shiver as he edges closer, roughly hiking my calves over his shoulders, and he links our hands.
The house falls silent. Ben holds me in place while he laps his tongue through my folds and around my clit and I can’t move, no matter how much I pull on his hands. It feels good, even if I don’t want it to, and soon I’m rolling my hips against his mouth. He watches me over the rise of my stomach and I catch him smiling smugly.
I come after a few minutes, writhing in my pink bed with Ben draped over me. He rubs the back of my hands with his thumbs while I gasp and clench my thighs, toes curling, and I try my damndest not to whimper.
Then he leans back and licks his lips with the same satisfied smirk on his face. I lie there, boneless, and don’t react as he dresses me in my new panties and onesie. The fabric feels nice.
“How did that feel?” Ben murmurs.
I manage a nod. “Good… good…”
He gently guides my quivering legs into the outfit. “Mhm. Making cummies for daddy is hard for little Princess Rey, isn’t it?” The onesie rolls up my skin and Ben slips my arms inside. “Sleepy baby girl. Take a nap and I’ll bring you dinner, okay?”
My mouth runs dry. I nod, swallowing hard, as he buttons up the front of the onesie.
He picks me up with one arm around my waist to peel the sheets back and settles me underneath them. I’m revolted by myself for having an orgasm at all and my eyes well up with long overdue tears.
Ben cups my cheek and bends over. His eyes light up. He’s elated to see me crying. I huff and sniffle and he shushes me and kisses the tip of my nose.
“I’m so tired,” I lie, voice cracking.
He nods. “I know you are.”
I grasp the front of his shirt and twist the fabric in my fists. Ben rests his forehead on mine.
“Don’t go, daddy,” I mumble. “I’ll miss you.”
He nuzzles our noses. “Will you?” I can feel his resolve cracking. He sits on the edge of the bed.
I nod and tug him closer. I’ll burn the fucking house down with both of us in it.
“I’ll be back soon, honey. I promise.” Ben kisses my cheek. “Then we can play some more.”
And he gets up and leaves, closing the door behind him. I feel fucking disgusting
Chapter 14: Ego
how pissed would u guys be if this was the end LOL
Ben wakes me with a tray of food. It’s a small omelette with bacon, spinach, and maybe cheddar cheese, and a glass of orange juice. I sit up in bed and mumble a ‘thank you’ as he sits beside me. The tray rests on either side of my thighs.
He rubs my back while I wolf it down. Maybe I’m in his good graces again, but that means I have to go back to debasing myself. I chew and watch Sesame Street. All I need to do is figure out how to trap him in the bedroom, then I’m home free.
Ben gathers my dishes when I’m done and holds my jaw to wipe my mouth. He sets the tray aside, humming as he selects a book from the shelf under the television: Where The Wild Things Are. I stay on the edge of the bed, picking at my onesie. How can I dig deeper without pissing him off?
“…Daddy?” I call softly.
I wait until he turns and looks at me before continuing. He’s already half-lured back in; I can tell by the hungry glint in his dark eyes. He needs this more than I can hope to understand.
I bite my lower lip. “Can I sit on your lap more when you work? I get lonely being up here.” For extra points, I fiddle with a button on the onesie and let my eyes well up with tears. “I’m sorry.”
It works. He frowns, pouting his lower lip, and nods as he comes back to the bed. Ben sits at the head of the bed with the book and draws me between his legs, resting my back to his chest. He kisses the top of my head and I make a show of nuzzling under his chin. Motherfucker. I’ll kill him.
We sit there for a while. He reads the entire book to me like I’m too fucking stupid to read it myself, idly grazing his long fingers across my thigh. I stick my thumb in my mouth for added effect.
If I can get him to fall asleep… then I can slip out and lock the door. Then I don’t have to pretend to like his disgusting games anymore.
I hesitate, then grasp his thick wrist and guide it toward my crotch. Ben’s reading drifts off as I whimper and push his palm between my legs, rolling my hips and soon clinging to him with both hands. He sets the book aside and brushes my hair back with one big hand, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
“Does Princess Rey want to make cummies for daddy?” Ben murmurs.
Fuck. My stomach turns but I manage to nod. He hums and deftly unbuttons the lower part of my onesie so he can slip a hand inside. I watch his fingers rhythmically stroke across my panties under the fabric and make the little pitiful mewls he likes so much.
He sighs, content. “There we go. Nice full tummy, a little reading with daddy, and now playtime before another nap. What a good girl I have.” His breath is hot on my ear. “Daddy loves getting sticky with his princess. Does Rey have tingles down there?”
“…Yes,” I mumble.
“Mm. Don’t worry—I’m here.” His middle finger slides under the hem of my panties and through my folds. “Daddy’s here.”
Ben keeps stroking and groaning until I fake an orgasm. I gasp his name over and over and writhe around between his legs like I don’t know what to do.
He moves me on my back and yanks through more of the onesie buttons until he can see my panties. Ben clenches his jaw and twists the leg around his fist, then rips it apart. He does the same on the other side and casts my ruined underwear to the floor. I watch him lean back and unbuckle his belt.
Nothing else comes off. Ben’s pants hang open and he works his cock free, already hard and leaking precum. He strokes twice as he leans forward, caging over me, and guides his head to my entrance. I close my eyes and wince as he pushes in.
“Good girl,” he whispers, cupping my cheek and slowly pushing deeper. He’s leaning on his elbow. He glances down to watch his cock gradually disappear inside my body. “Look how good you are.”
I hope this is the last time I have to tolerate this torture. Ben rests this forehead on mine and closes his eyes, thrusting gently, breaths stilted on my lips; he’s enjoying it more than I want him to. I don’t want to be so close to his fucking face. I wish he’d turn on on my stomach.
The television plays softly in the background and I try to turn my attention to the voices instead of Ben’s moans. He drops his lips to my throat and I have to watch his hips shifting between my thighs—too steady; too slow. The cold metal of his belt bites into my hip. He’s taking his time.
This is the last time. This will be the last time. I have to keep him in this room until he passes out.
Ben isn’t looking to leave any time soon, though. The show changes to something else, then something else, and he’s still on top of me, now beading sweat and panting. I keep whimpering and begging him not to stop and he’s too much of an arrogant asshole to ignore me. I cling to his shoulder blades and glare at each thrust he makes.
He huffs in my ear. “Fuck, Rey—gonna come so fucking hard.” His hips shift; he moves faster. “Finally doing what you’re told. Doesn’t it feel better this way?”
I dig my nails into his skin.
Ben comes a few minutes after with low groans and swearing. I grit my teeth while he fucks harder into me until his hips finally still and it’s finally over. He pants into my neck, jerking once more like he needs to make sure all his cum is stuffed inside me. My teeth ache from how hard I’m clenching.
He sighs. “Felt so good. Fuck.” His weight shifts and rolls to the side and he slips out of me. “Good job, honey. Take a nap now.”
I whine and turn, curling up to his chest. “Stay?”
“Got… calls to make.” Ben tries buttoning up the onesie as I struggle ever closer. “Rey—”
A hand braces on my hip as I whimper and nudge under his jaw. He groans even as his arms wrap around me and he gathers me to him, hugging tight. My smile drops as soon as he can’t see it.
Ben pats my back. “Just a few minutes, little one. Then daddy needs to work.” His heart pounds near my ear and he yawns. “I’m so proud of you.”
It doesn’t take long. He falls asleep.
I very carefully extricate myself from his huge arms once he’s passed out. Ben doesn’t react as I slip from the bed and back away, watching his peaceful face for any signs of confusion or awareness. He’s out. I’ll lock him in here and get the hell away.
My heart hammers as I pad to the door. I glance over my shoulder at him, burning with hatred, and turn the handle to close the door quietly. The lock turns from the outside.
And he’s trapped.
Chapter 15: Morpheus
IT'S DONE THANKS FOR READING
First I want to see the prison where he kept me. It’s a weird temptation; maybe borne out of the shock I’m in. But I’m not a teenage girl in a horror movie, so I skip descending back to the jaws of hell.
I head for the kitchen instead, padding softly, stuck in a daze. I can walk right out the door. He’s still asleep. He won’t even hear the lock; he might not realize I’m gone for a few more hours. I’ll be back to civilization by then. Back home.
Still, I circle, pacing the house in confusion. He has books in his living room: War and Peace, The Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe, The Hunger Games. I run my fingers along the spines. Weird. I never thought he would sit and read.
Then I finally head for the front door—hesitant. The handle is cool metal, round and hard, and I expect it to hold fast when I turn it. Then it doesn’t.
The mechanism clicks and the door swings open to the outside world.
I squint in the bright sunlight, stunned for a minute, then hear bees buzzing and taste spring on my tongue. It’s a beautiful day. I’m standing over a porch in what I think is a quiet cul de sac with other houses that look just like daddy’s.
come on, baby
Acid bile rises in my throat and I shrink back in the doorframe. Maybe I’ll wait until dark. I don’t want to run outside in a onesie, right? That’s bound to attract attention. I don’t want to look like a moron.
I finger the cracked wood on the doorframe, tentative, and feel a weird pull to go right back to hell. Maybe I should let him out.
“Hi there, neighbor!”
A man is walking by with a golden retriever on a leash. He waves to me from the street, smiling broad. There aren’t any cars; no other people, not even a bird singing. He’s standing near the mailbox in a windbreaker and his dog is trying to pee.
I wave. Wait. He carries on down the street and I realize the birds are singing, but my ears are ringing, and my stomach’s tied in knots. I don’t feel well.
“I won’t go back,” I whisper. Trembling, I cling to the doorframe and stretch out a covered foot, straining for the porch. “I won’t go back… I won’t go back…”
My toes curl, wriggle. I brush the hard wood with the tips and then plant my entire foot down. Suddenly I’m crying as I shift my weight and my other foot joins the first, but I’m laughing, too. I let my hands fall away from the doorframe and take a lungful of fresh air.
A lawnmower buzzes in the distance, mingling with a barking dog. I close my eyes and just listen for a minute; feel the breeze dry the tears streaming down my cheeks. I’m past the door. I’m free.
My first steps are hesitant and fumbling like a newborn’s. I pad down the stairs and the cement walkway, past the perfectly manicured lawn and trimmed hedges, right down to the black mailbox with its flag up. He’s sending mail out. Quaint.
I run my fingers along the hot metal and stumble onto the black pavement. I can go wherever I want. I can find Rose and Paige and tell them everything. I can shred his mail and leave it on the street—and I decide to do just that. I rip open the lid and tear the letter he’s sending out in half, then again, then again.
It’s satisfying. I drop the ruined paper on the street and carry on walking, pulse roaring in my ears.
Can’t get me now. Can’t get me now.
I don’t look back. I might turn into a pillar of salt if I look back.
I snap my fingers, mumbling. “Can’t get me now. Can’t get me now. I won’t go back. I won’t go back.”
little princess rey making cummies for daddy
Nausea burns into adrenaline; jolts down my legs. I swallow and quicken my pace toward the stop sign at the end of the street. I won’t go back. I can’t go back.
But I can feel his hands on me still and the burn of his cum down my throat into my stomach. I shudder and paw at my ribs poking through my skin and the bruises littering my forearms. He’s a beast. I want to go back and slit his fucking throat.
“I won’t go back,” I mutter, shaking my head.
A woman is kneeling in her garden pulling weeds. She leans back and stares as I pass.
…I find my way to an empty playground.
It’s twilight. I’ve been wandering for hours, avoiding patrol cars that I’m sure are out looking for me. I don’t quite know why.
I collapse in a swing. The chains rattle, cold under my fingers, but I just sit there and sag forward. It’s quiet here. Crows call to each other across the humid encroaching darkness and I can just… be, for a bit.
I close my eyes, and no one is touching me, or breathing in my ear, or—
“Very well done, little one.”
His voice is like ice down my spine; like a kick to the gut, but I’m too tired to be afraid. I shrug as Ben sits in the swing beside me and feel sick at the scent of his cologne. His swing creaks as he sways back and forth, but I keep my eyes closed.
We’re silent for a bit. I’m not sure what to think.
“The police are looking for you.” He curls a strand of hair behind my ear. “Not everyone appreciates how beautiful you look in onesies.”
My skin crawls when his fingers brush. I part my lips and taste the clear spring air.
Ben hums softly and his hand drops away. We lapse back into silence. I don’t know what his next move will be—and if I’m honest, I don’t know if I’ll resist. I feel… out of place. Wrong, in this big world, with all this freedom. No chains or bondage to tell me where to go and what to do.
Darkness creeps closer.
“I’ve been avoiding them,” I admit quietly.
“I know you have.” Ben swings higher, sighing. “Freedom is its own form of captivity, little one. A life in chains is easier; less demanding.”
“…Are you here to take me back?”
“No. I think the poking and prodding from the police will be punishment enough. Plus, you miss your little friends, don’t you? The Tico sisters?” He clicks his tongue. Scuffs his shoe on the dirt. “It’d be a shame if something were to happen to them.”
I refuse to look at him. Fucking monster.
“You better leave them alone,” I hiss, “or I’ll—”
Ben seizes my jaw, wrenching my head to force me to look at him. He’s kind of bedraggled in sweats and a T-shirt. I can see his black car parked at the top of the hill. Maybe he’s been out looking for me.
“What are you going to do, Rey?” he whispers, squeezing my jaw. “Are you going to curl into a ball and cry some more? Or do you think you’re going to kick my ass?”
“I’ll kill you.”
He barks a laugh. “You don’t have it in you.”
Ben shoves me from my swing and I fall in the dirt on my hands and knees. He drags me by my hair toward the darkness; toward a weeping willow with a bench underneath. There’s no light. No one can see us.
I claw at his hand and scream until he covers my mouth. He sits on the bench and pulls me in his lap, crickets chirping around us as night settles across the quiet park. They sing away while I beg him to stop and the bench groans under our weight.
I taste salt on his neck. “I won’t go back—I won’t—”
Ben wraps an arm around my waist and holds me tight to his chest, penetrating me painfully, shushing my shrill screams. It hurts. My knees brace on the unforgiving hard wood and I scream into his neck until I break down in blubbering sobs.
“You never left, honey.” He pets my hair and kisses my temple. His cock drives deeper into unwilling flesh. “Shh… it’s okay. Daddy’s here.”
I sag against his chest and cry while he fucks me. It doesn’t feel good. I smear tears on his rough cheek and sob to myself, struggling to ignore his soft pleased moans. Ben rests his cheek against the side of my head and thrusts soft and slow but his cock drags against my insides like a knife.
He doesn’t speak the entire time, just breathes in my ear, occasionally hitching a satisfied sound in his throat. Our clothes rustle and the long tendrils of leaves sway around us. I hate every second.
Ben holds my hips in place with one arm around my back when he comes. He groans and nuzzles my temple, rolling and jerking his hips as his cock twitches and spills inside me. I close my eyes and try to ignore it—the pain, the humiliation. He’s sweating and so am I. Hot night.
He hums and nibbles my earlobe. “Do you remember our first date? In the restaurant?” Cum dribbles from my body. “I’m friends with the owner—he pulls odd jobs for me every once in a while, to keep people quiet.” His hand closes around the back of my neck and curls to my throat. He whispers in my ear. “People like Rose and Paige Tico.”
“I hate you… I hate you.”
“No you don’t. You’re going to go home and be a good girl for me, and go to school, and we’re going to start dating. And if you let anything slip, your friends are going to pay the price.”
I grab his throat—squeeze. Ben laughs, Adam’s apple bobbing against my palm, and he slides his grip to my throat. He encircles my entire neck in one big hand and pushes me back as he sits up, still inside me. My lower lip quivers. I’m staring right into the eyes of evil and I can’t do anything about it.
He smiles. “There’s a patrol car down the block looking for you. Run along, sweetheart.” Then he stands, still holding my throat, but his smile fades into a blank stare. “Don’t make me hurt your friends.”
Ben lets go and I scream and batter him as hard as I can. He doesn’t fight back or try to stop me, but I’m not landing hard blows. I slap and shriek until my voice is gone and my arms tremble. He idly reaches down to fix the open flap on the onesie and gives me a soft slap on my ass.
I stagger back. I want to fucking kill him.
“Fly fly fly,” he coos. He slips his hands in his pockets and skulks by me, clicking his tongue. “I’ll be seeing you soon.”
When Ben’s back is turned, I jump on it.
I cling to him, legs around his waist and arms around his throat. He staggers and grunts in surprise but laughs and tries to peel me off. I won’t let go—I won’t go back. I won’t go back.
I hook my elbow under his jaw and brace with my free hand. His pulse throbs against my skin.
“I won’t go back,” I mutter.
Ben coughs and turns, trying to throw me off—so I tighten my grip. I feel his throat working under my arm and realize I’m strangling him. I coil tighter.
“I won’t go back!” I croak, shaking my head. I yank hard. “I won’t go back!”
He loses his footing and stumbles over the edge of the bench. We fall together but I’m locked around him like a fucking python and I ignore the sharp pain when his weight falls against me.
The willow sways softly. Ben’s yanking on my forearm but I ignore it; ignore him scratching desperately like I did to him so many times. I just—keep—strangling.
Lights flash from the parking lot. Ben is still struggling as two police officers rush down the hill to us and forcibly pry me off him. I kick and scream, but it’s plainly obvious what happened with his stained pants and my fucked-up onesie.
One tries to restrain me while the other pats Ben’s back.
“He raped me!” I shriek. “He raped me!”
“It’s okay—it’s okay.” The one behind me turns us and tries to sit me on the bench. “Deep breaths. We have an ambulance on the way.”
I have a need to crawl out of my skin. I tremble violently and watch the second officer handcuff and detain Ben, who casts me the look I’ve wanted to see since he first dragged me to hell.
“A neighbor saw you leave his house,” the officer says. I’m barely listening. “We’re taking him in for questioning.” He gently turns my forearm and whistles at the gashes dug into my flesh. “Shit. Just hold on. They’ll be here soon.”
I glance at the officer as he sits beside me on the other side of the bench. He looks scared, too, but that doesn’t give me any pleasure. His hair is messy blonde and he has rimmed glasses on. He almost looks like Ben, without the evil glint in his eyes.
I’m in shock, I think. The world is moving fast. The officer gives me his coat and I shiver miserably.
“What’s your name?” I rasp.
He smiles, but I can’t tell if it’s unsettling.