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That´s not enough

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Chapter One

 

He didn't go to her after sherrinford. He couldn't. How to deal with her emotions when he couldn't handle his own? 

 

So the first time he saw her again, he und John went to the mourge for a case.  2 weeks after they're return from musgrave.

Lestrade was allready there.  The Body waiting on the slab. 

And Molly.

Back turned to them.

Ponytail shinging and in place. 

 

"Hello Molly" Be careful now.

He missed John greeting her and George. Too fixed on her slight frame.

She turned slowly and the deductions came flying in: harldy slept, evident by the rings under her eyes. Lost 2 pounds, no appetit.

Outer appearance like always. Baggy troursers, sensible shoes. A white blouse and gulp the cherry printed cardigan.

Secretly he had a kink for that specific peace of wardrobe. Outfit garnished with the labcoat. Another kink?

He would analyse this later. Probably. Maybe.

She barely acknowledge him. Just giving the details of the post mortem and then left as soon as he concentrated on the case.  Right, case! Thats why you're here! 

He gave his findings to Lestrade and turned to leave the mourge. 

"Wonder what's wrong with her" Gavin. "Dunno. She's awfully quiet as of late,  no cheery or chatty at all"

He didn't wait for Johns answer or gave an answer himself. 

Leave, now! 

The door shut close behind him and he gulped in air. Was there something wrong with the ventilation? Why couldn't he breath?  Pulse raicing he clutched his chest.  Panic Attac? But why? 

Struggeling to get his bearings back, he didn't hear John approaching him.

"Everything allright, Mate?"

"Yeah, fine." Bearly able to answer. Great,  just great.

"You didn't talk to her? I can't believe it, Sherlock." John sounded disapointed. What was he expecting anywhere? 

"Ahm..no..somehow there was no opportunity" Breath!..in...out

"Cut the crap, Sherlock. You're avoiding her. Come on,  we need Molly.  I need Molly with Rosie. She's on the edge for weeks.. months even. Totaly stressed, even since before...Mary...and youˋre not making it easier, you could at least apologise.. i know, it wasn´t your fault..but it can´t go on like this. i really thought you would have spoken with her by now."

Johns babbeling goes on, but he couldn´t follow anymore. His chest felt thight, there was no air for him. Blue little dots appearing before his eyes. Am i fainting? oh Dear, please not.

Last he could need right now was colapsing in the hall way.

"You´re right John, i need to speak with her" turning he slowly walked down the hallway to the Labs. She´s porbalby there.

He pushed the door open, and there she was. Glancing his way, but saying nothing.

"Molly...i...listen.."

"It´s fine" no Eye contact, but at least she was speaking to him.

"Mycroft told me all about your Sister...horrible what she did, really"

"Mycroft?" What?

"Yeah, he came by after the bomb squad left, explained everything. You saved my Life...kind of.. thanks for that" she smiled at him, but it was fake and they both knew it.

She was staking papers, loading her arms with them. Wanting to leave. 

"Molly, i´m really sorry" she had to know "i..." how explain himself?

"i know" she said in a small voice, almost by the door on the other side of the Lab. Two more steps and she´s out.

Reaching for the Doorhandle, balancing her Papers and Books and opening the Door, she turned halfway to him.

"i´m sorry, too. for making you lie" and with that she left.

Leaving an confused consulting detective in her wake.

 

Wait. Lie?