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Sit Still Look Pretty

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She didn't hate him, not like some girls who got knocked up after one fervent night of passion and drink. She couldn't place the blame solely on him, she had wanted him as much as he wanted her but she had hoped he would have been aware enough to use protection. But afterward, she had heard through the grapevine that was his MO. In the end, it was what it was and there was no turning back. She couldn't imagine abortion, it might've been alright for some but she was raised staunch Catholic and that had never been an accepted idea in her home. Instead, she decided to have the baby, to embrace motherhood. She fretted whether or not to contact him. She didn't' want him to blame her, to hear that she was a gold digger but at the same time, her child deserved his father. So she reached out to him at last, his number was buried in her bedside table drawer, she had never intended on using it again but now, this was that rare occasion.

"Hello," his voice came on the other end of the line, that sexy Australian silk that she had been attracted to at first.

"Travis? It's Keavy," she said and waited.

"Keavy, hey," he said. He either recognized her or he was being polite.

"I don't know if you remember me..." she trailed off. She wouldn't have been insulted, he was a one night stand as much as she had been for him.

"I remember you," he replied. Then she worried, why did he remember her? She shook her head, pushing the thought from her mind and charged on.

"Okay well, I have to talk to you about something," she started. Damn, she should've planned this better. "I'm pregnant," she said and there was a long pause.

"With mine?" he asked.

"well I wouldn't be calling you if it was someone else's," she said and cringed, there's her sarcasm to save the day.

"Yeah, obviously," he muttered. "Are you...going to keep it?" he asked.

"Yes," she stated. The subject of abortion wasn't up for debate and she didn't want to open the door.

"Alright," he said and then paused again, fuck this was awkward and terrible.

"Whatever you want to do is fine by me but I just thought you deserved to know," she said and heard him clear his throat on the other end. Where had she caught him at? She hadn't even thought about that. Maybe she had caught him on set or even with another woman.

"Well you're completely sure its mine?" he asked.

"Completely but I am more than happy for you to do a paternity test," she said and he sighed, pausing again. Travis hadn't been very wordy, to begin with, and she was pretty sure this had stumped him.

"I don't know, we'll see then," he said.

"Alright," she replied and the conversation fell silent. She stared out her window, thinking of all the ways she could have handled this better and all the places she'd rather be than in this conversation right now. She had a photo shoot to fly out to in a day, she had to pack, get ready but here she was talking to the father of her child, the man she had put in the back of her mind after that one time. Now he was going to be part of her life forever.

"When are you due?" he asked.

"End of August," she stated, glancing at the date on her calendar.

"End of August, alright," he said and she sighed.

"Look, this is completely awkward and I understand that. I just wanted to tell you so you had the chance to make the choice. I'm flying out tomorrow to New York for a photo shoot and after that, I'm flying to LA, I don't know if you want to meet up to talk about it or if you want to just keep a distance, whatever works for you is fine with me," she said.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll meet up with you in LA, I'm in Santa Clarita, that'll work," he said.

"Okay, I'll be out there in three days, I'll call you then?" she asked, desperate to end this conversation.

"Alright, I'll talk to you then," he said and she nodded to herself.

"Bye," she said, not sure if the conversation was over or if she was cutting him off.

"Bye," he said and they hung up. She threw her phone on the bed and leaned back, groaning. God that was fucking terrible.