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Miss Fisher's Limericks

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There once was a copper named Jack 

Who really just wanted to Phrack 

With a lady named Phryne 

Though their window was tiny 

'Cause Aunt P would surely come back. 

 

There is a hawt copper named Jack 

A topic much lauded on Slack.

Miss Fisher's the dame,  

Who shouts out his name, 

Every time that they frick and they Phrack. 

 

There once was a lady named Fisher 

Who was a very big wisher 

Please, Jack, make your move 

Then get in the groove 

And take your time to ravish her. 

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There once was gal name of Dot 

Who was much more clever than not. 

When it came time for Hugh 

To follow a clue 

He stumbled much more than he aught. 

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There was a detective named Jack 

Solving cases he sure had a knack 

He'd follow a clue 

With his buddy Hugh 

And knows that he's got his back.

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There once was a gent name of Guy, 

Whose fudge would get you quite high.

Mr. B, he ate four, 

And was knocked to the floor. 

Great scene for our man Richard Bligh. 

 

There once was a gal named Aunt P 

Who was snooty as snooty could be 

When it came to fudge 

On this she'd not budge 

"I think figs are just not for me." 

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Miss Phryne and Dot at the beach

Saw Jack and Hugh dive and then breach.

When the men who had searched for the dagger

Left the waves with a swish and a swagger

The ladies were robbed of all speech.

 

Hugh bowed and presented the prize,

But Phryne could not pry her eyes

From the view on the sand

Which she felt was quite grand.

Her gaze was affixed on Jack's thighs.

 

While observing Jack swim in his suit,

Phryne thought to herself, "Oh, he's cute!"

While finding him fetching,

Her breath was still catching

'bout the way it was snugging his boot.

 

 

 

After finding the bootlegger's cache,

Phrack went over the rails in a flash.

From a bridge they were hanging

When they should have been banging.

Then fell into the drink with a splash.

 

 

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There once was a doctor named Liz 

Who was a right a medical whiz.  

Beat that drunken ass knob 

For the coroner's job. 

She knows how to get down to biz. 

 

There once was a lady named Mac 

Who no one considered a quack. 

She was a great doc 

Who eschewed all cock.

She much preferred gals in the sack. 

 

A doctor with gorgeous red hair

Had quite the sartorial flair.

She could wear a cravat,

And not look like a prat.

She's suave and yet so debonair.

Chapter Text

There once was a fella named Jack,
Who knew of our penchant for Phrack,
He'd never tell Phryne
He loved her sublimely
In case she did not love him back.

The lovely Miss Fisher one day
Decided to get her own way
She tired of baiting
Jack into a mating
'Twas time to employ lingerie.

She served him a delicious dinner
In hopes that they'd both be a winner
She plied him with whiskey
Until he was frisky
And then they banged.