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Life is about surviving and more

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“Are you sure you want to go?”

Clarke zipped her bag and hoisted it up to her shoulders. “Am sure.”

Abigail pursed her lips. “Stay out of the Volturi’s way,” she eventually sighed and embraced the younger blonde tightly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, Mom,” Clarke whispered back and placed a lingering kiss at her mother’s cheek.

Clarke smiled. She was going to miss her Mom. But she needed to be independent. This world offered a whole lot more than she could ever imagine. It was not broken. It was not dangerous. In this lifetime, she would be free.

“Are you going to turn Marcus?”

Her mom just gave her a tired sigh and looked away. Clarke left it at that.


“Blood must have blood!”

“We don’t believe in that anymore!”

“You have changed our ways! Heda died because of you! We are at war because of you! You Skaikru started it all!”

“It wasn’t supposed to be like this! Heda Leksa died because you people didn’t want change!”

“Heda was weak to love someone like you.”

“You killed Lexa!”

“No. You did.”


“Dr. Griffin?”

Clarke blinked. “Yes?”

The nurse gave a chart. “There’s a patient in Ward B.”

Clarke accepted it. “Thank you.”

As Clarke walked towards Ward B in a human-pace, she thought of the sudden painful memory.

Memories of the past sometimes blasted Clarke’s mind. It was spurts and sudden that Clarke didn’t have a choice but to relive it.

Clarke died in her past life in pain.

Clarke woke up in this world in pain.

Being a Vampire was not in Clarke’s bucket list.

In her past life, being the leader of her people and fighting for her life was not her in bucket list.

Fate screwed her in every lifetime, she thought with disgruntlement.

When Clarke woke up as a Vampire, the first thing she thought was ‘Not again’.

Even if she had enhanced strength and enhanced abilities or more than human than usual, she needed to fight for survival. No human would walk up to a restaurant and say: ‘Hey! Do you have some blood?’.

No. She was a Vampire. And she needed to keep it from anyone.

And she thought life was about more than surviving. Ugh.

The only perk she had with being a Vampire was her ability to heal and ability to give pain.

Clarke always was her mother’s daughter and being a medic was something Clarke enjoyed. But her ability to give pain must have developed from her past life. She was a Healer. But she was also a Killer.

Cue in Mount Weather. Dun-dun.

She also couldn’t avoid war. During her travels, she fought in the two consecutive World Wars and other wars in other countries.

Clarke was trying her best to save a lot of innocent people during war eras. Vampires tend to use wars as a feeding festival.

Clarke healed then lose lives due to unexplained deaths.

Clarke can explain it. She had enough.

In those years, Wanheda resurfaced. She healed the sick. She made those hard-headed Vampires suffer and disappear.

She had saved and killed thousands of lives. Clarke was just happy that the war stopped and humans became smart and lazy.

Clarke eventually became a full time doctor. She took credits at universities and got her degrees.

Clarke loved being a doctor. Even if she couldn’t use her healing abilities to worst cases and lost some patients due to technicalities of breaking Vampire laws, she still loved being a doctor.

Saved a few today, but more for tomorrow.

“Hello, Dr. Griffin,” a blonde haired doctor with a handsome face and gentle smile greeted Clarke as she arrived at Ward B. “My name is Dr. Carlisle Cullen.”

Clarke already smelled the certain scent of a fellow blood drinking friend. “Hello, Dr. Cullen,” Clarke greeted back. “What can I do for you?”

Dr. Cullen smiled widely.

Golden eyes were bright.

Yellow eyes.

Animal drinker.

Human friendly.

Clarke sighed in relief. She wouldn’t need to fight any day now.

Dr. Cullen presented her the patient. They discussed health plans. Exchanged possible surgical path. By the end of the day, Clarke gained a new friend.

“How many years have you been a doctor?” Carlisle asked curiously. Apparently, Clarke was the first Vampire he met who was also a doctor.

“Too many to count,” Clarke waved her hand in dismissal. “I guess…roughly 500 years, give or take.”

“Ah,” Carlisle took it in stride. He must have met ancient Vampires.

“150 years for me.”

Clarke sipped at her go-to bottle. Fresh O+. “Rough years?”

Carlisle shrugged. “Some.”

The two blondes worked together for years.

Clarke liked Carlisle. He reminded him of her Dad. Carlisle didn’t have Jake Griffin’s dry sense of humor but Carlisle had a fatherly aura that made Clarke calm and safe enough.

They bonded with ease.

Carlisle spoke if his stint with the Volturi. He even had a portrait with the 3 Kings. The way he was turned. His love and hate for his father and religion. His desire to die and his discovery of animal blood.

Clarke talked about her turning and her stint with the World Wars. She told him about her special abilities and how she utilized it during the wars and before the wars. She told him of her relationship with her mother and their separation because of her desire to travel the world where she ended being a nomad medic who set up tents in small villages and healed for free. She told him of her Wanheda persona and how much she hated when it arose.

“In my newborn phase, I wasn’t a fan of drinking blood,” Clarke explained. “It was only a necessity. It was not a rave.” Clarke looked at her hands. “I was a fan of bloodshed. I woke up while a revolution was happening. I tried helping. Healing there. Saving here. But they didn’t stop dying. I had enough and gave them the pain they wanted.”

“But Wanheda is you and you are Wanheda,” Carlisle concluded. He patted Clarke’s hand. “You are you, Clarke. Wanheda or not. You live to heal and you live to give pain. That is you.”

Clarke just hugged Carlisle and thanked him. He was so like Jake. Forever believing that she was enough.


“I have a Coven,” Carlisle stated one day once they finished a bypass on a little boy. “Our usual base is in Washington.”

Clarke paused. Memories of the past flooded her mind. She knew it was a sign. Washington DC. TonDC. Tondisi. “May I visit?”

Carlisle smiled widely. “You may even stay.”

Clarke traveled with him and met the Cullens.

They were all golden eyed and cultured.

Carlisle convinced her to stay and try to settle down for a few decades. Clarke just grimaced at the word high school but eventually gave in. She could volunteer where Carlisle worked. Curse him for being turned much older than 20. Clarke could gamble and pass for 25 but no older than that. Being turned at 17 left a bitter taste in her mouth in this type of situation.

The topic of blood was raised and Clarke felt defensive of her preferred diet. Carlisle knew her reasons.

Clarke’s eyes were a muddled crimson that could pass for dark brown in some lighting. Clarke partake on animal blood but she still needed human blood.

“My abilities take toll and animal blood isn’t enough,” she defended while Edward gave her the stink-eye. “I could drink animal blood but I still need human blood. I have a go-to bottle which I refill from blood banks so there will be no human-killing happening.”

“We don’t know you,” Edward countered.

“You just can’t hear my thoughts, boy.”

Clarke knew there were telepathic Vampires and other species that is why she taught herself to strengthen her mind from these types of mind intruders.

First of all, it was a complete and utter invasion of privacy. Second, she didn’t want anyone to know who she was and her past. Third, she didn’t want other to know all the killings that happened. Ever.

She wasn’t called Wanheda for nothing even though it left a bitter taste in her mouth.

Her memories and thoughts were her own. The thousand deaths she had dealt with was her own.

A gnawing feeling of dark thoughts enveloped Clarke’s mind but she shooed it away. She wasn’t going to kill one of Carlisle’s beloved ‘children’ just because this one was a prissy brat even though all her fiber and her Wanheda persona treated this boy as a threat.

No. No more killing.

She didn’t kill for less. She always killed for the worst. Not for a prissy boy.

Amazingly, the most standoffish of the Cullens welcomed her into the family with open-arms. Rosalie Lillian Hale applauded Clarke for pissing of Edward.

With that, she was welcomed to the family and now an honorary Cullen.

Her school registration was named Clarke G. Cullen.

It was the first time Clarke experience going to a high school in this life. Her past life had those lectures in the Ark but it was different when classes were in a School Building. Her university stints were mostly for college and doctorate degrees.

School was mundane. Clarke knew better than the teachers and she couldn’t eat cafeteria food and join sports club. But it was an acceptable past time. She only worried for Jasper who looked like he was having a yearlong stomach cramp. She offered shrouding him with a calming shield for his throat and nose but Jasper declined saying he wanted to practice for Alice. Ah…young love…

Hunting was another pleasant past time. Before it was only her and her Mom. Abby tend to always hunt for Clarke. Now, Clarke hunted with a coven and it was amusing watching Emmet wrestle bears, Edward running with mountain lions, and Rosalie getting down and dirty with an Elk.

One of their hunting sessions, Clarke tilted her head then grimaced. “What is that smell?” she complained as she walked away from a certain part of the forest.

Rosalie smirked. “Oh. Those are the dogs.”


Alice went on a long explanation about the La Push reservation outside the boundary of Forks and selected Quileute Tribe members turning into wolves who struck a treaty about borders and Vampire etiquette with Carlisle decades ago.

“The Shifters,” Clarke paused, brows furrowed. “Are they trouble?”

Carlisle saw the troubled expression of the blonde. “No,” he quickly replied with a shake of a head and s comforting smile. “They are a peaceful settlement that was ravaged by Vampires in the past.” He saw the blonde’s tensed shoulders drop a bit. “They have what they call Wolf Spirit Warriors. We call them Shifters.”

Clarke mulled over the information then nodded when she found no threat. “I see.”

“When you joined this coven, I promised you peace,” Carlisle placed a comforting hand at Clarke’s shoulder. “There will be no wars in this area as long as we abide by the rules.”

Clarke didn’t believe that. Edward and Rosalie were like reenacting the World War every opportunity they got resulting a pissed of Edward running off to a sister-coven in Alaska and an enraged Rosalie damaging and fixing cars all week. Alice being the all-knowing brat that she is manages to bring Jasper out of the house away from the squabble, Emmett defending his wife by day and destroying counter terrorists in his gaming console at night, Esme ignoring her ‘children's’’ antics and busying herself with house designs and cooking for the soup-kitchen, and Carlisle making himself at home at the hospital.


Clarke shook her head and confined herself in her room which she asked Esme to convert into a studio where she drew and painted and sharpened her blades. Jasper, being a veteran soldier, was intrigued of her weapons. Swords. Guns. Bombs. She had a collection. Esme, at first, was against it but Clarke assured her the guns and bombs didn’t work. Her swords had dull sides. Only one set of dual blades were sharp and special. It reminded Clarke of her.

“Why do you have these?” Jasper asked while eyeing the glass case and its contents.

“A past life,” Clarke remembered whispering in lost thought. “It reminds me of my loved ones.”

Alice, on the other hand, was intrigued of the sketches and paintings. Alice and she had the same love for drawing. But Alice sketched for clothing design and her visions. Clarke sketched her past.

“Who are these?” Alice tapped her chin in thought. “And where are those?”

“Loved ones,” Clarke replied while touching the sketched face of her favorite mechanic. “Landmarks where I lost and gained.” She touched the sketch of Mount Weather.

Alice and Jasper didn’t ask again, knowing Clarke’s past haunted her until now. More of her past from her past life but they didn’t have to know that. Yet.

Clarke thanked them for the curiosity and respect.

Months went by and everything was fine. The Cullen children continued to go to school. Carlisle went to the hospital. Esme assumed her mother role.

Clarke was at peace. From haunted memories. From her.

Everything was fine.

Then Edward found a Singer and a Mate in a human.

Rosalie wanted to strangle him.

Emmett and Alice were over the moon with a new addition to the family.

Carlisle and Esme were just happy for their 96 year old bachelor son. Jasper just held on to Alice.

Clarke found everything amusing.

“When the Volturi hears of this…” Rosalie grumbled as she bent another one of her wrenches and threw it at the garage wall which became embedded to the wall. “Why are you not finding this as a threat?”

“Isabella Swan?” Clarke sipped at her go-to bottle. Rosalie eyed the bottle with disgust. “She’s not a threat, Rosalie.” The other blonde gave her an incredulous look. “Unless Eddie’s gonna advertise to Italy that he’s got a human girlfriend.”

“This is not a joke,” Rosalie hissed. “Don’t worry, Rose,” Clarke patted the other blonde with a reassuring smile. “I’ll look out for everyone.” Rosalie just huffed and plucked the crooked wrench straightened it then went back to work.

Well, everything didn’t go fine.

Bella was a magnet for trouble.

Bella was a clumsy. Terribly clumsy. She reminded Clarke of Jasper Jordan when he was so high and drunk with moonshine. It made Clarke ache for the lanky boy who laughed with her then hated her when she couldn’t save Maya from the mountain then loved her again when they fought side by side against ALIE 1.0 and Pike and the Grounders. She missed her friends every day.

Edward made matters worse.

He declined Bella at first, opting to run off to the Denalis, leaving the human confused and hurt. Clarke clucked her tongue at the juvenile decision.

“CLARKE!” Alice shouted when she got the vision and Clarke just sighed.

She had to do this.

Edward was a walking emotional disaster. She reminded him of her.

Clarke in her past life was a walking emotional disaster.

Edward was protected by Carlisle and Esme.

Clarke was protected by Jake and Abigail.

Edward thought he was privileged and did what he thought was right.

Clarke did so, too.

Then everyone died.

She died.

Clarke wouldn’t forgive herself if this human tried to kill herself because she couldn’t understand why she felt hurt and longing for Edward’s departure. Of course the mating related factors already happened. Or was it just a Vampire-induced pheromone thing? Jasper couldn’t decide between the two. The love for a Singer’s blood and a Mate’s call was simply had the same degree of emotion. Bella was still first and foremost Edward’s Singer.

But Edward still left Bella when things got out of hand. What were family for if he couldn’t even ask for advice on this thing? Edward was going to kill this girl because he decided it was the right thing. Clarke was not going to let that happen.

“What is she going to do?” Rosalie asked.

Alice pursed her lips. “Something.” Clarke stood up. She walked straight towards the lunch line. Stopped beside her target.

“Do you want to sit with us?” Clarke started, startling the girl. Bella looked spooked.


“I think your friends wouldn’t miss you that much,” Clarke eyed the group who was gawking at them. Clarke almost scoffed. Clarke was the only Cullen who was friendly enough to talk to other students. Talking to Bella should not be gawked at. “Even only for today? Just a payback for what our stupid brother did.” She ended with a scratch at the back of the head.

Bella was still wary. “Okay…”

The girl was just so depressed. Clarke was going to smash Edwards face on a tree multiple times when she sees him.

Bella got her lunch and followed Clarke.

Clarke eyed Rosalie who was scowling but behaved.

Emmett was grinning from ear to ear.

Alice was clapping excitedly.

Jasper just held on to her.

“Hi, dear brothers and sisters. This is Bella.” Bella waved shyly.


Alice couldn’t handle it anymore and started barraging Bella with questions and shopping schedules and whatnot.

Emmett invited her for game night.

Jasper sat still and clutched unto Alice for dear life. Rosalie was just quiet and brooding.

“You did good,” Rosalie muttered as they all stood up for class. Clarke just beamed at her.

Bella became a lunch buddy starting that day.

Bella was awkward and quiet but she was intelligent. It suddenly occurred to Clarke while they were doing homework which ended with them playing chess at the end of the day and Bella winning, Bella reminded Clarke of Wells, as well. Her sweet best friend who was awkward and quiet but was intelligent and who always wins at chess.

That day, Clarke vowed to protect Bella.

Wells died because a little girl hated his father.

Bella wasn’t going to be stabbed by some little girl because of her father who was the kindest Chief of Police Clarke had ever met but Clarke would protect Bella. Rosalie and Edward be damned.

Alice became Bella’s best friend but Clarke was always there for Bella. Every nightmare. Every injury. Every clumsy moment.

Edward eventually came back and she and Edward had an understanding.

Bella eventually knew about the Cold Ones and Shifters thanks to a young Quileute boy.

Bella and Edward eventually got together but Clarke would kick Edward away from Bella’s window every night.

It doesn’t mean that he was the boyfriend he could have the privilege to be creepy voyeur.

And she smashed Edward’s face on a tree multiple times when he went back.

Rosalie was quite pleased.

Esme was not.

Bella was somewhat accepting.

Emmett just whooped with Alice.

Jasper still held on.

Carlisle was still cooped up in the hospital.

Everything was going fine again.

Until three nomads appeared in Forks.

Clarke just saw red.

Wanheda in all her glory appeared in that field.

Clarke was not a fighter in her past life. But this life gave her all the abilities and skill a Natblida could have had.

When James stated his intention to hunt down Bella, Clarke just charged and pounded her fist at the nomad. His companions fled immediately, sensing the murderous intent Clarke gave off as she continued to pound her fist that would make any Grounder proud.

That would make her proud.

“You are a monster!” James wailed as Clarke managed to pull off his arms. His face and body were full of spider web cracks.

Clarke was more than a monster.

She was Death.

“I had killed hundreds. A thousand, maybe,” Clarke stated ominously. The thunder and lightning in the skies echoed her intent. “Killing is not a game, James. It makes you more than a monster.” James just wailed louder when Clarke put her hand at his head. He could feel thousands of blade-like sensation continuously stabbing him.

Clarke healed for life.

Clarke gave pain for death.

She was Wanheda. The Commander of Death.

“Clarke!” Clarke was pulled out from her concentration to look at Bella who was crying but looked at her worriedly.

Clarke looked down at the nomad who looked like he wanted death more than anything.

“The little Vampire…” James muttered as his head was tilted at a strange angle but his red eyes were staring at Alice. “She was a good little girl…”

“You know Alice?”

“Mary Alice…” James continued. “Mary Alice was supposed to be mine…”

“Where did you meet her?”

“Asylum,” James smiled wickedly at the memory. “She was a little prophet. The doctor just got in my way…”

Clarke frowned then turned to look at Alice who was wide eyed with shock.

“Jasper, light a fire,” Clarke said when Alice didn’t respond.

“Yes, ma’am,” Jasper nodded and started collecting wood.

Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle took up dismantling James’ limbs and cutting off his head. Rosalie helped Jasper with the fire and once it was burning the rest threw James into the pit.

Screams of anguish echoed throughout the forest.

Esme held onto Alice and Bella. One was still in shock at the revelation of her past. One was still crying from emotional stress.

Clarke stood frozen. Watching James burn into ashes.

She reached up to her necklace. It was a customized pendant she had sculpted when the memories of her past life came to her. It was the shape of Beca Pramheda’s ALIE 2.0 design.

“In peace, may you leave the shore,” Clarke started. The ancient proverb the Ark had instilled in her flowing freely from her lips. The ‘final words of death’ as Raven called it one time when they finished reciting it for her Mom when she passed. “In love, may you find the rest.” James’ cries were wild as the fire licked at his skin. “Safe passages on your travels.” Clarke looked up at the skies. It was dark and unforgiving. “Until your final journey to the ground.” Clarke looked down at James as he slowly burned. “May we never meet again, James. Never.” Clarke’s eyes grew dark and sinister. “Yu gonplei ste odon.”

The fire went out, so were James’ ashes.

Clarke strode away.

Death, even though it was just, was not a pleasant sight.

“Clarke!” and a body collided at Clarke’s. Bella was crying as she clung at the blonde.

Clarke let the girl and hugged her back. “It’s alright, Bella.”

“Y-You could have died!” Bella cried. Clarke silently scoffed at that. Didn’t Bella see how the nomad didn’t even have the strength to overpower her? “When you punched him, I thought you will get hurt.”

“I’ve lived a few lifetimes, Bella,” Clarke wiped the girl’s eyes. “James is nothing compared to what I fought before.”

Mount Weather.

Kwin Nia kom Azgeda.

ALLIE 1.0.

The Coalition.

Charles Pike.


She was purely human then. It was harder. She was mortal. She almost died a lot of times.

“Do not worry for me,” Clarke murmured as she took Bella’s face with her hands. “Worry for your mortal bum, okay?”


Clarke smiled and kissed the brunette’s nose. “Okay.”

Bella giggled and snuggled closer to Clarke. She would protect Bella. She would protect her Wells of this lifetime.

But Clarke almost regretted saving Bella when Edward bombarded her with kindness.

“I would slice of your dick and burn it to crisps,” Clarke threatened when Edward gifted her another set of her favorite oil pastels. Edward conceded but thanked Clarke every passing moment he got.

Clarke just took all his gratefulness…until she smashed his grand piano.

Esme just sighed as the peaceful weeks she got after the nomad encounter got noisy again when Edward whined for the loss of his baby and Rosalie and Emmett's cackle. Alice just shrugged and said Clarke’s decision was varying from smashing his CD collection to bringing Bella to Port Angeles without permission to the piano. The piano was time-saving. Jasper just held on to Alice. Carlisle went back to hospital duty. Clarke smiled and high-fives her pseudo sister.


“We have a meeting with the Shifters,” Carlisle announced one day. “What do they want?” “Dog food?” Rosalie offered and winced when she got a scolding look from Esme.

“A year ago there were no Shifters,” Clarke said with a frown.

“Ah…it only takes a year for a Shifter or two to acknowledge our presence,” Carlisle offered. “It’s like they breed when we stay here longer than a year,” Emmet rubbed his perfectly baby skinned chin. Clarke looked out the windows to look at the direction where the Reservation was located. She mulled at the new information.

“A defense mechanism of some sort, I guess,” Clarke mumbled to herself but the Cullens heard it loud a clear.

“We think so, too,” Jasper murmured in agreement.

They dressed up and went towards the border. Clarke wrinkled her nose. The stench was of wet dog multiplied by a thousand. Wet dog smell didn’t appall Clarke but this was just too much to handle for any sensitive nose.

When they got there, three humans were already there. They were gruff and buff and close-shaved.

After a few minutes, one by one, humongous wolves started to come out from the trees. Wolf Spirit Warriors.

Clarke slightly frowned in disappointment. She expected them to be humans with wolf heads. She let the thought slip towards Edward and the boy choked up a laugh.

“Greetings,” Carlisle greeted. “We are the Cullens.”

“I am Sam Uley. I am the Alpha of this pack,” a gruff young man spoke out. He reminded Clarke of the Grounders. Tall and bulky and tattooed with a permanent scowl in the face.

“Hello, Sam. My name is Carlisle.”

“We know,” Sam huffed. “You’re the doctor.”


“How can a leech be a doctor?” one of the La Push boys growled out. “I bet he already broke the treaty, Sam!”

“Shut up, Paul,” Sam barked out and Paul back down submissively. Sam turned back to Carlisle. “The treaty still stands. Hurt no human. Don’t cross the border.”


Clarke tuned out the conversation between leaders and surveyed the rest of the Shifters.

They were varying of sizes and colors. But one thing was clear. These Shifters’ sizes were not of ordinary wolf-size. More of horse sizes. At least, not Pauna size. Clarke visibly shivered at that thought. Jasper glanced at her but Clarke waived him off and continued to observe the Shifters.

Aside from taking the appearance of a horse-sized wolf, there was nothing Clarke could see. If the Shifters were made to fight off Vampires, then these wolves could tear her to pieces in a blink of an eye.

Clarke pursed her lips at that thought.

But, it’s either that or the Pauna.

Floating Paunas… Clarke was deep in thought of her memories with the Pauna encounter when a set of bright green eyes crossed her vision. Clarke’s eyes widened and her she silently gasped in shock.

There were two wolves out of the group that were smaller. One was grey with a bored look while the other had a black pelt that was dark enough to produce a midnight blue shimmer when the light hit the fur. The dark furred wolf stood proud and tall almost regally and had intense green eyes that stared at Clarke for some reason.

If Clarke’s heart could beat, she could already have a heart attack.

Jasper choked on air and Edward and Alice turned to him then turned at Clarke. Edward’s face was clenched because of not hearing Clarke’s thoughts while Alice’s were blank apparent from a vision.

“What’s the matter?” Carlisle asked.

“Nothing!” Clarke exclaimed then cleared her throat. “Nothing.” She smiled. “Should we go?”

“Yes. Sam and I are done with the discussion of the treaty.” The Alpha and his two henchman were the first to go then one by one the rest of the wolves followed. But the wolf with the green eyes stayed. The grey wolf nudged the other but the green eyed wolf nudged back until the grey wolf huffed and walked away.

Clarke stared at the lone wolf at the other side of the border.

“What is she waiting for?”


“Must be guarding the border…”

“I can’t read her mind.”

“Wow, Eddie-boy. First, Clarky. Then Bella-bear. Now a wolf?” Emmett grinned, dimples full on display. “Your powers are flunking, dude.”

While the Edward whined, the Cullens started to head home.

Clarke gave the lone wolf one last look then followed the rest of the Cullens back to the mansion.

Clarke had the feeling she would see the wolf soon.

Sooner as she thought.

After meeting the Shifters at the border, Clarke could sense a nearby presence. It was just out in the surrounding trees near the Cullen mansion. The others were none the wiser. Clarke was the only one who could sense it.

Could it be?


One weekday where the sun was too high for them to come out, they stayed at the backyard.

Emmett and Jasper were playing chess where Emmet whined all the way. Edward was quietly composing music. Rosalie was reading an engineering book. Alice was sketching a new clothing design. Esme and Carlisle were sitting close together and enjoying the serene atmosphere.

Clarke stood at the top of the stairs leading down the main backyard grounds and stared at a particular tree.

Triku. Amusing. She got it.

“You can come down the tree now, you big raccoon,” Clarke shouted with a fond look.

The rest of the Cullens, except for Alice, just looked at her with confusion.

“Who are you talking too, Clarke?” Emmet asked.

“I could hear your heartbeat from here, raccoon!” Clarke continued to shout.

After a few minutes, a lithe figure dropped down the said tree. The Cullens gasped in surprise at the intruder.

“Is that from La Push?”

“Why is one of the dogs here?” Rosalie snapped her book shut. “Isn’t this breaking the treaty?”

“I don’t think so…” Carlisle looks at Clarke. “Clarke knows her.”

The Cullens looked at Clarke with another round of confusion and curiosity but Clarke only had eyes at the approaching figure. It was her.

It was her and Clarke could feel herself tremble in relief and longing.

It was her and Clarke thanked all the gods that she was here.

It was her and Clarke suddenly felt whole again. In her last life, she fought a war she couldn’t end. No matter what she did, there was no winning.

She died with a sword in her gut and looking at the sky that was full of ash and blood.

She couldn’t save everyone she loved.

Her dad. Wells. Finn. Raven. Monty. Bellamy. Octavia. Indra. Her mom.


When she woke up in this life, she was again at war. British Revolution or something like that. Her father was dead and it was because of her mother again. But this time, Clarke did not accuse her. Amongst the confusion and panic, a Vampire made the town a feeding ground. Dead and missing people were of the norm because of the war. A drink here and a sip there. Abigail Griffin was always a doctor in every lifetime and was always late out in camps and hospitals, trying and failing to save patients. Abigail became one of the victims in the Vampire’s quest for food but was failed to be drained dry. Three days of agony and confusion, Abby went home only to feed on her dear Jake and turning her daughter Clarke.

At the moment of her turning, Clarke recovered her past memories in detail. Abby did so too. The two Griffin women looked at each other. Relief and anguish flooded their senses. They mourned at the loss of the most important man in their life. Jake Griffin was bound for an early death in every lifetime.

But what Clarke mourned more was her Soul Mate.

Clarke woke up in this life without her.

Wells tried to give her his love. Becoming her best friend. Refusing to cooperate with his father. Trying to control the 100 when Bellamy only urged everyone to be free from the Ark.

Finn tried to show her love. Accompanying her in the ground. Making her feel that she wasn’t alone. Choosing her even when Raven showed up. Killing for her. Sacrificing for her.

But ultimately, Lexa showed and gave her unconditional love. Listening to her when Camp Jaha tried to overrule her for being a child. Betraying her during the siege at the mountain for her duty and love for her people. Saving her when everyone was out for her blood for destroying a mountain. Using her as an advantage against the other clans for the sake of the Coalition and peace between the clans. Swearing her fealty to Clarke and Skaikru even if she knew that Clarke’s people were a danger to the Coalition. Still loving her even though she died because of Clarke. For Clarke. Everything for Clarke.

Lexa loved her people.

Lexa loved Costia.

Lexa loved Clarke.

But when Lexa loved, she also died bit by bit.

Her people were enslaved by war and death after years of peace from the Coalition because of the Skaikru.

Costia was killed by Azgeda.

Lexa died because Titus decided to try firing a fayagon at Clarke.

Clarke wished she hadn’t fallen from the sky.

Clarke wished Lexa didn’t rise from the ground and catch her.

But Clarke wished more if Lexa lived.

Lexa brought her pain and suffering. But Lexa also gave her the love she wished that lasted.

Last time she saw Lexa, she was on death’s doors but smiling at Clarke and telling her that her fight is over.

Right now, she was watching Lexa walking towards her. Alive and well.

It was Lexa. The same dark hair in intricate braids. The same strong jawline. The same intense green eyes.

But this Lexa was not her Commander. She was not Heda.

This Lexa was slightly hesitant. Young.

This Lexa was approaching the house where a coven of Vampires lived and she was successfully putting up a cold, brave face but Clarke could see the unsure eyes and nervous clenching of fists.

This Lexa was not Heda of the 13 Clans. This Lexa was not the Commander of Blood.

But this Lexa is Lexa.

Like Clarke is Clarke.

The girl finally stopped at the foot of the stairs and looked up.

The girl who made her life miserable and killed the boy she loved. The girl who helped her people but betrayed her in the end. The girl who believed that love was weakness but in the end loved her with all her heart and died because of her.

The girl at the bottom of the steps was young and had the innocence Lexa of the Grounders never had.

This Lexa was a normal girl who suddenly turned into a wolf because of Vampires.

This Lexa had not saw and fought years of war.

This Lexa did not live to fight and die for her people.

This Lexa is innocent and Clarke was relieved. Even though this Lexa was not the Commander, at least Lexa had grew up without thinking that blood must have blood.

Clarke smiled down at the Shifter who slightly fidgeted.

This time’s Lexa looked around to be 15 years old. She was still tall and her off-white wife beater and old running shorts didn’t hide the sun-kissed skin and taut muscles and beautiful tattoos. The only missing thing from this ensemble was the black war paint but that was for another lifetime.

She would meet her dear raccoon soon.

Lexa pursed her lips and gave a wary look at the Cullens who were watching the scene unfold then shifted her attention towards Clarke.


The girl tensed at the call of her name but kept head held high and stared hard. Even in another lifetime, things never changed. Lexa was such a Commander.

“Clarke.” The soft voice with the hard ‘K’ that made Clarke’s knees weak spoke out. Wide green eyes stared hard at Clarke. “You are real.”

Clarke smiled. She knew Lexa was slowly recovering her past memories. “Yes, I am.”

“You are…not a figment of my imagination.”


“You are Clarke Griffin.”

“Once,” Clarke responded with a tired sigh. “A long time ago. In a different time.”

Lexa seemed to understand the meaning behind those words and nodded.

“Fate must hate us, Lexa,” Clarke shrugged. “Once, we were Sky and Ground.” A flash of recognition crossed Lexa’s face. “Now, we are reincarnated in different species that hated each other.”

“I do not hate you,” Lexa replied with a shake of the head. “Or the Cullens.” She added as an afterthought. “But I must do what I must to protect my people.”

“Your people…” Clarke barked out a laugh. “God, Lexa. You do not change.”

Lexa looked down for a second then looked right back at Clarke. “I still do not remember all…” she informed with a tinge of regret. “But I always see you.” Clarke could see the longing in the green eyes. “I dream of blades and blood. I dream of a mountain and people dead.” Lexa gave Clarke her the smile. The smile that wasn’t visible but it was there. Only Lexa could give that invisible smile. “I dream of gold hair and blue eyes.”

Clarke reached for her pendant. Heda’s sacred symbol. Clarke still had gold hair but her eyes were not the bright blues of the past. It was turned into a bloody crimson the day she was turned.

“I do not dream of you,” Clarke smiled at the sudden frown on the younger girl. “I always think of you.”

For the first time, even from the past, Lexa blushed deeply. Clarke felt like whooping in celebration.

“Do not mock me…” Lexa grumbled, looking down to hide her blush. Young, innocent Lexa was so cute!

“A wise woman once told me that ‘Mockery is not a product of a strong mind’,” Clarke quipped with a smirk.

Lexa’s eyes brightened at the phrase. She returned it with her own playful smirk. “That is one wise woman.”

Clarke almost wanted to go down and wipe Lexa off her feet and kiss her like there was no tomorrow. But Clarke was a gentlewoman. She was not brash in this world. If Clarke became the hotheaded teen she was back at the Ark, this world with burn.

So she stayed put. Even though all she wanted was to go to Lexa and touch her. Feel that she was alive and not dying.

“I should go back…” Lexa informed with a dejected tone. “Sam. He…”

“I understand.” Lexa was still a Shifter and Clarke was still a Vampire. “But you would return?” Clarke asked with hope. She glanced at Carlisle who nodded. “You are welcome here.”

Lexa looked conflicted but in the end a resolute nod was given. “I will return.” To you.

Clarke accepted that. Lexa would return. She would hold on to that. She lived for centuries. She was a patient person now.

“Remember this, Lexa.” Clarke clenched her right hand into a fist and placed it at her chest. “Our fight is not over.”

Lexa’s eyes widened further and seemed trembling at those words. Clarke almost felt guilty. She could see the memories bombarding Lexa’s mind right now. When she told her Mom ‘I forgive you’, her mother stood still and gotten her past memories and broken down in front of Clarke. Telling Lexa such words were a trigger Clarke needed for the other girl to remember everything.

Lexa suddenly snapped back. Her form more regal than before. Her hands behind her back. A knowing glint in those green eyes. Clarke finally met the Commander.

Oso gonplei nou ste odon.”

Clarke finally got Leksa kom Triku back.

They both nodded at each other and Lexa turned away to leave. Clarke forlornly watched the love of her life leave.

Ai hod yu in, Leksa…” she whispered.

The girl stopped and looked back. Fierce green eyes bored unto Clarke.

“May we meet again, Klark.”

The girl continued to walk away until she took off sprinting and finally shifting into a wolf leaving Clarke grinning widely.

“So…that was a thing,” Emmet drawled out and got smacked at the head by Rosalie.

“Yeah…” Clarke smiled dopily at her pseudo-brother. “A good thing.”

“Did you just give out an invitation to the dog?” Rosalie quirked a brow.

“I did.” Clarke scowled. “Lexa is not a dog. Well, she is. But she’s Lexa. She’s important to me.”

Rosalie smirked then nodded. Emmett wiggled his eyebrows. Clarke stuck out a tongue at him.

“The Shifter Imprinted on you,” Edward informed with interest. “I saw glimpsed of imprinting in the wolves’ thoughts at the meeting. It’s a sacred thing for them.”

Emmet scratched his chin again. “I thought you couldn’t read her thoughts.”

“I can’t,” Edward grumbled. “But her eyes were set for Clarke and Clarke alone. It’s either what past they share is important or that she Imprinted.”

“Imprinting means I have a soul,” Clarke teased. “Do you have one, Eddie?” Edward scowled deeper.

“Are we going to get explanations about what occurred, Dr. Griffin?” Carlisle, ever the curious one.

“Maybe,” Clarke shrugged. “Well, my love-life happened a lifetime ago.” She dismissed with a wave of the hand. She couldn’t quite explain everything now. “Shouldn’t we be discussing about Eddie’s now?”

A loud groan came out from Rosalie and Jasper. Edward looked offended.

A gentle hand dropped unto Clarke’s shoulder and she turned to find Esme smiling warmly at her. “I am happy for you, Clarke,” the maternal Cullen said and Clarke could almost cry.

“Thank you, Esme…”

“Abby will be, as well.”

Clarke thought of her mother and chuckled lowly. Her mother meeting Lexa again would be a bloodbath. “I guess so.”

An arm slung around Clarke’s neck and came face to face with Alice. Bright eyed and a big smile.

“Your future’s so bleak, I’m so excited even though my head hurts!”

“Thanks, Alice.”

“Your Mate has the perfect body for dress-up!”


Alice’s whines echoed the whole house and Clarke left her with her husband and trudged off to her room slash studio. At the far side of the room was a covered canvas.

Clarke breathed in and exhaled deeply before removing the cloth. Touching the charcoal drawing, Clarke smiled forlornly.

“See you soon, Commander.”