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I am the Author ! I am the one who decides how it ends !

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So… this was how it ended…


Well… seriously.


Like… could they really more ruin a character than the way they were doing ?


(Spoiler : yes. Clearly. Like with Facilier's death in the 20th episode.


And the worst of it is that I don't care, they ruined him the way they ruined Jack for me.


The way he died was as terrible as the way Jack died.


Facilier just… disappeared.


It was just like : oh, we don't need this character anymore, just let's kill him in a non-emotional way, because, really, who cares ?


Personally, I must admit that I don't.)


Were they really going to kill Jack, one of the most interesting characters of the new season ?


(Again, it's a personal opinion, if you don't agree with this and if you like Facilier, well… you won't agree with what follows. And you won't like it.)


The Author (me, clearly, not Henry. Even if I don't think Henry would have accepted to let his friend die this way) then just let escape a gasp of horror when she realized that yes, Facilier wasn't going to let Jack alone, and was going to kill him.


With voodoo…


Hum… excuse me, WHAT ?


“Are you kidding me ? She muttered, furious. Like, what, really ? What kind of death is it ? And, were they really forced to kill him ? He was just arrested, right, couldn't they just let him in prison until the curse break ? Even if I don't like the way Drizella left the story, well, at least, she is still alive and had her happy ending. Well, at least, things are good for her, and she is with her sister.”


Silence appeared then, the young woman being too astonished by what just happened in front of her eyes.


(Well, not really, not physically, as she was not here, but you understand the idea.)


“And, well… is is possible to make a death seem to be that non-emotional and so meaningless ? I mean, I never liked Tremaine, but her death had a sense, it really meant something, and they did make efforts to make us feel something about her. And here… nothing ! I know Jack was a murderer, but he did have an interesting story. Unlike a certain wizard just here who means nothing for anyone. In fact, not for me.”


(Spoiler : it's still the case.)


“And Jack was killing evil witches, who were dangerous ! And were they really forced to add Zelena in his story ? I don't know, I guess Zelena is more popular than Jack is, but he really deserved to get more screen-time, and a real flash-back about him and his sister ! Not an entire episode about how Zelena had always been rejected before, and wasn't anymore because she changed, a thing we all already knew !


I mean, I didn't ask for Law Believer (well, maybe as a BroTP, we could have had it), but it would have been cool to have Jack being more developed, and...”


The Author had a deep sight, and didn't need so much time before taking her decision.


(Hum… you're sure about it ? I mean… really sure ?


This is a fanfiction, I can do and write what I want, and I don't care if someone doesn't agree with it !


Hum… okay.)


“You know what fourth wall ? Fuck it ! I am going to go in the OUAT universe, and I am going to fix it !”


Couldn't you do it before, and fix Neal's death ?


Oh, shut up !




The two men started when they saw a woman appear in front of them.


(Well, they knew about magic, so they weren't that surprised.)


“Who the hell are you ? Facilier asked, still holding the voodoo doll in his hand.


- Well, she answered, trying to be impressive, my name (well, pseudo) is Angelica R ! I am the Author !”


Yes, according to their suspicious looks, it was not that impressive.


“As the Author is Henry, I don't think you can say that you're the only Author, Jack said.


The Author sighed again.


- Well, I am an author, not the Author. And I am the Author of this story.


- The what ? Facilier demanded.


- So, break the fourth wall, done, the woman said, not answering him. Now, what was I supposed to do ? Oh, yes, she remembered, stop this masquerade, of course.”


With just one gesture, she made disappear the doll in Facilier's hand.


“Why did you do this ?


- I don't like you. As a character, I don't dislike you, not really, but there are two things about you I don't like. The fact that you were going to kill Jack just here, who, I think, deserves death less than yourself do. Oh, and I don't like Shadow Queen. It's not that I really love Outlaw Queen, but the season 7 really made me love Step Queen (a ship I am the only one to write about), and the thing is that, for me, your relationship for Regina is not done well here (sorry for the fans, again, it's just what I think about it).


- What are you talking about ?”


The Author rolled her eyes, and, making a gesture, she just made him shut up.


And she smiled.


“Oh… I really understand now the reason why Regina really loved using it on Zelena during season 5. Now we can talk.”


She then gave him his voice back, and the sorcerer looked at her, choked.


“How are doing this ?


- I told you, this is my story, and I do what I want here. I decide how things happen. I am the Author ! I am the one who decides how it ends ! Then, she frowned. Hum… isn't it the title of this One Shot ? Oh, yes, I forgot about it, my old habit of using the title of my story in the story itself. This commentary was already too long, she muttered.


- Please, can you tell me the reason why you're here ? Jack asked her.


- Certainly not to free you. Because, Jack, even if I like you as a character, and even if these witches deserve to be punished… I am sorry, but I still must to stop you.”


Jack raised an eyebrow, seeming to think something like : What, really ?


“Hey ! The Author protested. I do like characters like Regina, Rumplestiltskin, Zelena or Hook, but you can trust me, if I had to meet them during their revenge/dark/evil period, I would try to stop them.


- But why are you here ? He repeated.


- Oh, I don't want you to get killed, you don't deserve this. Oh, and please, don't tell me that all witches are bad, it does not make any sense to me. This is just crap, and you are wrong. But it's not your fault, the writers made you do this.”


When the two men looked at her, skeptical, she rolled her eyes.


“What ? Oh, come on, we had a “darkness made me do this” with Rumplestiltskin, a “my Evil side made me do this” with Regina. So, why not a “the writers made me do this” ? Oh, bloody hell, we did have a “the author made us do this” with Snow and Charming ! One of their worst ideas ever, if you want to know my opinion about it, she muttered, more for herself than for the other.


- Excuse me ? Facilier said. But isn't it supposed to be our story ? What the hell are you doing here ?


- I want to change the story, because I think the writers messed up everything here. Well, it's not the only one thing they messed up with in this show, but we are not here to talk about this.


- You know that this is absurd, right ? Jack said.


- Yes, of course it is ! That's the reason why it's so fun ! So, this is how it ends here. Facilier, you're not going to kill Jack, you're going to leave this place, and kill Gothel. Then, you will cure Henry, wake him up, and then, you will leave the town, never come back, and let StepQueen happen ! Because I live in an alternate universe where Drizella never left town and where she lives happy with Regina.


- But, this is absolutely non-sense, and I am sure you know it, Facilier told her.




- You're crazy.”


The Author smiled.


“Maybe. Maybe not. Well, as we are all a little bit crazy here…


- Wait, Jack told her, frowning. Did you just try to kind of quote Alice in Wonderland, or something like that ? Because it was a total fail.


- It doesn't matter… And I'm not crazy, I'm a fanfiction author, and I am happy to meet you. Well, one more than the other.


- A what ? Facilier asked.


- Fanfiction. You're in one of them. Now, please, go.”


The wizard disappeared without asking any other questions.


“That's the reason why I love fanfictions…


- You know I am not going to stop, right ?


- You see, she answered, if this story was not just pure crack, fun, non-sense and was more than just something totally absurd, I would make you go to the Wish Realm. Then, you would meet grown-up Wishverse Henry (I read something about this on Tumblr, and it was a really interesting idea of a story). And then, I would make you both fall in love, forget about your revenge, and we would have both Law Believer AND Glass Believer. That would be just perfect.


- I understood nothing about what you said.


- It doesn't matter. When I leave you, you will remember nothing about it, just as Facilier, but in this version of the story, in one, at least (well, two, if I take into account You hate me and you're right, but I'm not your enemy, where I made Zelena talk with you and where you didn't die), you will be safe. Well, there will be no Law Believer, and I am kind of sad of it, as this is one of my new OTP now, but I guess I can deal with it.


You see, that's the reason why I love fanfictions, she continued. People may sometimes not agree with what happens in canon, for many and various reasons, and it's my case sometimes. I don't agree with everything, and even if it's futile, there is a part of me which is sad that Hookfire or SwanQueen, or even StepQueen never happened. And I am still mad at the writers for killing Neal, even if, at least, his death was much more emotional than yours.


But, at least, with the fanfictions, I can try to fix it, and yes, it is a total deny of what really happened, and maybe it doesn't worth it, maybe it doesn't change anything, and I agree with it. But I don't care, and I'm happy to know that, even if it's just fiction (as it is in canon, by the way), well, at least, I know that there is a version of the story where things happen the way I want them to be.


Now, please, excuse-me, I have some Law Believer fanfictions to write, like right now, because, as with StepQueen, I am afraid I have a fandom to expand on my own (except of course if other people want to write about Law Believer or StepQueen, I would glad not to be alone on these ships. Even if I never wrote about Law Believer, and by the way, thanks for victorfrankenwhale for writing about them, and making me discover this ship that I ship so much now. And I will try to write about them, one day.) Bye !”


And she left, leaving a surprised and astonished Jack.


His last thought about it could summarize what happened.


It had absolutely no sense.