He didn’t want the acting; he hated the acting. It was just like the police politics, but much worse. Police politics were just a bother and annoyance and tiresome. The acting was bullshit and made him want to shoot something.
If that something was Reiji’s stomach or some other part of his that wouldn’t lead to instant death, all the better. Maybe his fin to make it harder for him to swim off and escape.
Because it was Reiji’s acting that he hated so. Because it was Reiji’s acting that made his insides burn. Because it was Reiji’s acting that made the desperation tear with claws of poison at his insides. Because it was Reiji’s acting that created his insecurities, made him doubt.
He didn’t want the acting, he wanted the truth. Because then maybe finally, he would be able to find some peace of mind.