Chapter Text
"You thought I didn’t see it? You thought you could hide them all? You overrated yourself, young man. Now, he might think that you’re a saint, but do you know what I see in you? You’re nothing but this disgusting crap that I can’t wait to get rid of. Stay away from my brother. Or else I’ll make you wish that you’d never been born!”
The cold words went through him like a knife stabbing right into his heart. The only difference was that knives couldn’t hurt him the way words did.
“Dean, I –”
He wanted to protest, to defend himself. He wanted to say that he’s nothing like what Dean had just said. But then, no words came out. His mouth stayed opening. His eyes stayed tearing up. His heart stayed bleeding. He wished he could stop all of this crap. He wished he could end his life just at the moment. Living was too hard for him.
It took a moment of intense silence until Dean slammed the door behind him with anger to leave Jack all alone in the dark room. Tears started falling down the boy’s cheek. They’re all glowing gold.
“Mom… Help me”, the boy sobbed in the dark.
“Hey boy”, a voice whispered into his ears.
He sniffed and turned around.
“Who’s that?” asked Jack with his painful eyes.
Nobody but himself was in the room.
“I’m your friend”, the voice chuckled.
“I don’t have any friend”, said Jack. A tear fell down.
“Oh yes, you do. And I’m right here with you. Perhaps, I’ve always been with you”. Jack could feel the smirk somewhere in the dark.
“Father?” Jack straightened himself to look around.
“Nope”, the man chuckled again. “Your friend, your true friend who never leaves you and hates you for who you truly are”
“Tell me your name”, Jack wandered his eyes around in the dark room.
“My name? My name is Lonnie”
“Hello. I am Jack”, replied the boy.
“I know” he whispered.
“Why don’t you come out? Why are you hiding in the dark?” Jack sounded very confused at the moment.
“You are the only one who has the right to ask me to come out. Do you want me to?” the voice danced from his right to his left ear. It got Jack turn around.
“Y – yeah. Sure!”
Jack looked around to find out there’s a man standing in his room. The man was walking slowly into the light. Jack leaned in to get a better look of him. It freaked the hell out of the young boy to see it’s him standing before his eyes. It’s totally him. But it’s him with leather jacket, black ripped jeans, and black leather boots. His eyes went wild.
“Shhh”, the man jumped into him and covered his mouth when Jack was about to scream.
“Take it easy, man! I’m not hurting you!”
Jack frowned. There was a bit of horror in his face.
“I would let you go. But you gotta promise me that you’re not gonna scream, okay?”
Jack nodded. The man slowly let go of him and sat down face-to-face with Jack.
Jack swallowed then asked. He looked at the man as if he’s some kind of fantasy.
“What- what are you? Why do you look like me? Are you real?”
The man chuckled. “I am your conscious. It’s like your imaginary friend who is only seen by you. I honestly don’t know why I look like you. Maybe because you’ve always wanted to have a twin brother to bear those weights with you. My shape depends on your wishes. And I am real. But to you. Not to anyone else”
“Oh… kay. Why-why are you here?”
He smiled softly, “To be with you. You’ve been crying for days, screaming for help, for anyone to be with you. So I’m here. You’ve been praying hard enough”
“Is it true that you’re here for me? Not just for my power?” Jack worried.
“Yes, dude. I’m here for you. Right when you got what you need and you don’t need my company anymore, I’m gonna hit the button” Lonnie winked at him.
“What button?” Jack was confused.
“The button of leaving you forever, dude”, Lonnie rested a bitch face.
“Hey! Don’t leave me! I need you here! You can be my big brother! You can be the Dean to my Sam!” Jack said in hurry.
“Whoa whoa whoa! Slow down, boy! First thing first, I’m not gonna be anything to anything. Secondly, Dean is a real dick to you, why do you want to be like him?”
“He…” Jack felt like his cheeks burning.
“What?” annoyed Lonnie.
Jack whispered to Lonnie’s ears. “If I tell you, would you promise me not tell anyone?”
“Who can I tell to? You’re the only one that see me, bro.” the man lifted one of his eyebrows.
“Okay…”, Jack took a deep breath and pushed out a sigh. “It’s because… Dean has this ability to do a certain thing that I really want to”
Lonnie thought for a moment before giving up. “I don’t get it, man. He’s a human. You’re a nephilim. You’re absolutely better than him everyway. There’s nothing he can do that you can’t.”
“Well…” Jack bit his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood there. “He can truly make Sam smile. He might be hard on me, but he’s really soft on Sam. And whenever Sam talks about Dean, there’s this light in his eyes with full of trust and faith and love. And, I want that too. I wanna make Sam happy like that whenever he thinks of me”, Jack avoided the man’s eyes.
“Holy crap! Dude! You wanna take Dean’s position in Sam’s heart?” Lonnie was quite shocked. But then he smirked. “Wait. Hold up. You’re having a crush on Sam Winchester, aren’t you, Jackie?”
“I… I’m not!” Jack’s voice was pretty high and his face was pretty red.
“Oh man! Oh man!” Lonnie jumped up and couldn’t stop laughing. “Dude! Do you have any idea about what this is?”
Jack looked up at the man and frowned. He, of course, shook his head.
“First, how old are you? Two weeks! And yet, you’re having your first crush already. Second, do you know who you’re having a crush with? Sam Fucking Winchester! He is like this precious son of a bitch that Dean “Murderer” Winchester will slaughter a whole house for. And Dean has already disliked you. You liking his brother, it ain’t helping, man. It gets this situation worse. And third, why the hell does it have to be Sam Winchester?”
“He- he’s nice to me. And he’s smart, he’s caring and loving and full of hope. His soul is so bright. He has a warm smile with beautiful eyes and dimples. He’s tall and strong.”
Jack went on and on about Sam. His face lighted up like a he’s having someone giving him all of his wishing birthday presents. He smiled softly, chuckled sometimes when it came to Sam.
“Yeah, the man has quite an awesome ass. Can’t deny”, Lonnie winked playfully at Jack.
The boy blushed, “It’s not… I’m not talking about his lower part… I’m just…”
“Okay! Okay, dude! The class gets it! Don’t explain more”, Lonnie put his hands in defense. The man was thinking of something.
“So,” Jack spoke softly. “Would you help me?”
“To get yourself killed by Dean Winchester? Hell no!” Lonnie replied with his huge eyes.
There’s an obvious disappointment on Jack’s face. He looked like a puppy just got kicked out of the apartment. To his disbelief, Lonnie sighed.
“But”, the man smirked, “if you ask me to piss Dean Winchester off? Hell yes!”
Jack gasped. There’s a horror expression on his face. “I don’t! No! I don’t wanna make him mad. He’s gonna kill me! Please don’t piss him off! I don’t want him to be! Please”
Jack was shaking. The boy was starting to sob all over again. His gesture was so tense. Lonnie dropped himself down and put both hands on Jack’s shoulders.
“Dude! Easy! Breathe! Breathe for me! I was kidding. I was saying that Imma help you. Just it! Sam is gonna love you more than anything! More than his books! Hell! Even more than his laptop! I promise you, Jackie. Don’t freaking cry! Sam is not gonna like weak boy! Don’t you wanna be strong for him? Dean is strong! That’s why he’s attractive! You must be strong! Jackie, for Sam!”
Lonnie comforted Jack with whatever he could think of. And no matter what he said, it’s worth. Jack stopped himself from crying. The boy sniffed and nodded in agreement.
“Okay! That’s good!” Lonnie finally relieved.
Then he got up, gave Jack a hand to help the boy stand up. Jack followed the man’s lead.
“Jack. Okay. I’ll help you. But I gotta be honest with you, man. It’s gotta be really hard. So I need you to cooperate with me, alright?”
“Yes!” Jack said immediately.
“Okay. I’ll help you to gain Sam’s affection, but you gotta let me lead you without questions, without doubts. It might sound really strange but I can’t do it myself sometimes, so I might need your body for some certain tasks. Is it okay with you?”
“Y- yeah!”
“Good. So we have a deal here, right? I will be your leader, you will be my boy. Then, Sam will be you lover. How does that sound?” he lifted an eyebrow in amusement.
“L- lover? Sam and I?”
“Hell yea! And then you can get laid with that finest ass of all creations, dude”, Lonnie licked his lips.
Jack cocked his head. “What is get laid?”
“Well… It’s when… You know what? Too soon for it. I’ll show you when it’s time. Just know that both you and Sam will feel so good”, Lonnie smirked.
Jack smiled in excitement. “I wanna make Sam feel good. He deserves it”.
“Sure. No argument. Anyway, so we have a deal, right? You’ll let me in?”
“Yes!”
“Good!”
“Thank you!” Jack hugged the man.
“For what?” Lonnie hugged back in surprise.
“For helping me with Sam thing. I owe you”, the boy cheered up.
“You’re really gonna do anything for him, right, Jackie?”
“Yes! He deserves everything!” Jack felt happiness flowing inside of him.
“There you go, you sound like Dean already. Sam Winchester would be that hella kinda crush of yours, Jack. I’m sure of it”
Lonnie smirked. His eyes went glowing blue in the dark.